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September 27, 2014 10:47 AM   Subscribe

"This is like the gateway drug of the Jewish foods" - Non-Jews try traditional Jewish food for the first time
posted by The Gooch (86 comments total) 20 users marked this as a favorite
 
Neat video, but couldn't you have linked to the YT video itself? After scanning some of the clickbait articles whatever that site is, I need brain bleach.
posted by Nevin at 10:49 AM on September 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


no cholent, no credibility
posted by escabeche at 10:55 AM on September 27, 2014 [5 favorites]


Do you think the woman who says "Again with the condensed?" is deploying a Yiddishism on purpose, or has that usage totally lost its ethnic flavor?
posted by escabeche at 10:57 AM on September 27, 2014 [7 favorites]


Is this it (direct to YouTube)?
posted by joseph conrad is fully awesome at 10:58 AM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


My brother insisted we try the kosher bakeries in north Chicago once. Respectfully, God would not make his chosen people eat cookies that frigging bad.

Matzah ball soup is my jam, though. We eat that regularly in our house.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 10:58 AM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


Oh! I can tell you why Jewish cookies are bad. They mostly don't have butter in them. The reason for that is that you're not allowed to mix meat and dairy (not counting eggs) in the same meal, so you can't have butter cookies after a meat meal. Mostly, therefore, Jewish bakeries will make their cookies with oil, so you can have them for dessert if you've had meat for dinner. There are actually delicious baked goods that use oil instead of butter, but a lot of non-dairy cookies are fairly gross.

Rugelach is a dairy dish and typically has cream cheese in the dough, and it is indeed delicious.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 11:01 AM on September 27, 2014 [15 favorites]


Maybe I was just at the wrong bakeries, though.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 11:01 AM on September 27, 2014


I want to point out that this is all Ashkenazi (Eastern European Jewish) food. Sephardic and other Jews don't eat this way. The first time I exposed my Italian (but Jewish) girlfriend to gefilte fish and kugel she reacted pretty much the same way.
posted by ubiquity at 11:02 AM on September 27, 2014 [10 favorites]


wait ...what are the special powers afforded to kugel?
posted by The Whelk at 11:02 AM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


It's not Jewish food--it's Ashkenazi Jewish food. Granted, Americans are more likely to encounter us than, say, Mizrahim, but still. (I mean, non-Ashkenazim generally don't like gefilte fish either, y'know?)

That caveat out of the way:

1) I like gefilte fish, although not enough to buy it (there's a whitefish shortage right now, and it's driven up the price), but yeah, acquired taste.

2) Not all that fond of kugel, myself, but there are less sweet versions of it out there.

3) Chopped liver is not attractive, I agree.

4) Yay for matzoh ball soup! My parents live near a deli that dishes up a mean bowl of the stuff, with a softball-sized matzoh ball. Good eating.

5) *sigh* Rugelach *sigh*

6) I was genuinely astonished that they liked Manischewitz, which is a notoriously dreadful wine--as one of the tasters said, it really does taste like grape juice. (Joke relayed to me many years ago by a professor of mine: "You know, Al, there aren't that many Jewish alcoholics." "Really? Why?" "Seriously, have you tasted Manischewitz?")
posted by thomas j wise at 11:02 AM on September 27, 2014 [8 favorites]


(Crossed paths with ubiquity, I see.)
posted by thomas j wise at 11:03 AM on September 27, 2014


Is this it (direct to YouTube)?

Yep. Buzzfeed. They've done a lot of these "A people try B people food." They're pretty entertaining, and not as offensive as one might assume.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:04 AM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


You could really do these for any nationality/ethnicity's food and they'd probably be fun, as long as the people were game and decent like these folks.

I'm imagining the one for Transylvanian food.

"Do they put pork in everything?"
"So over there 'salad' pretty much means 'bowl of chopped stuff held together with mayonnaise'?"
"Celery root in this one, too, huh?"
posted by DirtyOldTown at 11:10 AM on September 27, 2014 [7 favorites]


I have to concede thomas j wise's point about likelihood. Before the holocaust, more than 90% of the world's Jews were Ashkenazi, while today it's estimated that it's about 75%. But in North America, it's still around 90%. So I may have been quibbling when I claimed it wasn't Jewish. So sue me! Mea culpa.
posted by ubiquity at 11:11 AM on September 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


"So over there 'salad' pretty much means 'bowl of chopped stuff held together with mayonnaise'?"

So, exactly like tuna salad or chicken salad?
posted by Sys Rq at 11:16 AM on September 27, 2014


So, exactly like tuna salad or chicken salad?

Yeah, but on and on to the point of silliness. It's like a 1971 potluck over there.

Also, with the cabbage. And dill.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 11:19 AM on September 27, 2014 [5 favorites]


If you are trying to turn me against Romanian cuisine, you are failing miserably.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:25 AM on September 27, 2014 [5 favorites]


Actually, it's pretty good stuff. I'm just trying to guess what people trying it for the first time would riff on.

Even some of the "salads" are good. The eggplant one, salata de vinete, is pretty awesome.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 11:28 AM on September 27, 2014


Oranges and maraschino cherries? What the fuck is going on with that kugel?

(Also everyone knows that, Jerusalem kugel aside, potato kugel > noodle kugel).
posted by Itaxpica at 11:32 AM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


My family hamentaschen recipe is The Best One, and I have had this confirmed by multiple outside sources, both Jewish and gentile. Just for the record.

(Also, my grandma puts apricots and ricotta in her noodle kugel, and it is SO GOOD.)
posted by nonasuch at 11:38 AM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


"Do they put pork in everything?"

ahaha as a vegetarian who spent a summer in Romania this is so accurate, but the list needs more "garlic sauce? is this just a shot glass of garlic?"


Dear everyone with family recipes, are any of you willing to share them? I've never even had potato kugel! I don't even know what I've been missing all these years!
posted by jetlagaddict at 11:40 AM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


This made me crave chopped liver. Why don't they like it?
posted by mumimor at 11:40 AM on September 27, 2014


Many years ago, when I was starting off in grad school, I lived with housemates who all came from various parts of the south. One day we were discussing our "native" cuisines, and it snowballed into a debate on the merits of various dumplings. We had a dumpling competition and I made matzoh ball soup and my housemate made chicken and dumplings.

I won.
posted by sciencegeek at 11:41 AM on September 27, 2014


wait ...what are the special powers afforded to kugel?

Someone mixed that up with Kegel a long time ago.
posted by Mr. Yuck at 11:42 AM on September 27, 2014 [7 favorites]


I was genuinely astonished that they liked Manischewitz, which is a notoriously dreadful wine

If you're not a big wine fan, you might like Manischewitz precisely because it's so terrible at being wine.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:43 AM on September 27, 2014 [8 favorites]


Actually, anyone interested in The Best Hamentaschen should memail me, as I am moderately evangelical about this recipe.
posted by nonasuch at 11:53 AM on September 27, 2014 [6 favorites]


My favorite wines are things like muscat or eiswein, so naturally I've always loved Manischewitz.
posted by kmz at 11:54 AM on September 27, 2014


When I saw the quote “I would eat this all day, I would have sex with it. This is the gateway drug of the Jewish foods” I assumed they were talking about matzo ball soup. Yup.

I really enjoy this entire series of videos. Irish people trying American food is pretty awesome (mostly they are disgusted).

I sort of wished they would have given these people a good New York Bagel. For people outside of NYC most likely have never had a real bagel.
posted by el io at 11:55 AM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


el io -- I think lox and bagels have become detached from their Jewish moorings.

Also, Montreal bagels for the win!
posted by jrochest at 12:01 PM on September 27, 2014 [7 favorites]


Needs more kishka! And knishes and barley soup and pastrami and blintzes and crap, now I'm hungry.
posted by capricorn at 12:03 PM on September 27, 2014 [8 favorites]


My Hawaiian daughter-in-law craves matzoh ball soup, and she hasn't even had Oma's matzoh ball soup.
posted by theora55 at 12:12 PM on September 27, 2014


Yeah there's a reason why the food in Israel is decidedly Sephardi.
posted by PenDevil at 12:12 PM on September 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


Eastern European Jewish food? Meh.

Food from all the nations in the Eastern Mediterranean?

Oh hell yes.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 12:12 PM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


I sort of wished they would have given these people a good New York Bagel. For people outside of NYC most likely have never had a real bagel.

I think the BuzzFeed offices are in New York so they are probably pretty familiar with New York bagels. But yes, they deserve to try real (Montreal) bagels.

(For years I thought matzoh ball soup was something really stodgy and dull, so I've never had any. Now I has a craving. So where's a good place to go for it in Toronto?)
posted by maudlin at 12:19 PM on September 27, 2014


Small text, because I am ashamed to say this, but... the box matzo ball mix from Manischewitz is pretty awesome.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 12:28 PM on September 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


I really enjoy this entire series of videos. Irish people trying American food is pretty awesome (mostly they are disgusted).

I just went off to search for this, and I only found the video of Irish trying American snack foods, which they, of course, hated. I am, however, very interested with what the rest of the world thinks of American cuisine and national foods, snark aside.
posted by Lord Chancellor at 12:29 PM on September 27, 2014


I didn't realize this was an entire series. Fun stuff.

In college, I worked at a Memphis barbecue joint and watching international visitors try the food was pretty much like these people from X try food from X videos, over and over again.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 12:38 PM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


GRIBENES
posted by poffin boffin at 12:56 PM on September 27, 2014 [5 favorites]


"I am, however, very interested with what the rest of the world thinks of American cuisine and national foods, snark aside."

I think its unfair to ask the world's opinion about American food while at the same time asking them to put the snark aside.

(although the South, Texas, and Louisiana have some incredible cuisine).
posted by el io at 12:57 PM on September 27, 2014


I'm married to a Jewish woman, who's mother is handy with all the traditional dishes: kugel, chopped liver, rugelach and matzoh ball soup that could quite possibly raise the dead. etc. Her family was somewhat stunned that I enjoy Gefilte fish, however. Just call me Goy Wonder.
posted by jonmc at 12:59 PM on September 27, 2014 [5 favorites]


I don't know what would be defined as american food aside from corn dogs and hamburgers and that's as dumb as saying italian food is only spaghetti.
posted by poffin boffin at 12:59 PM on September 27, 2014


i really want a corn dog now
posted by poffin boffin at 12:59 PM on September 27, 2014


One day we were discussing our "native" cuisines, and it snowballed into a debate on the merits of various dumplings. We had a dumpling competition and I made matzoh ball soup and my housemate made chicken and dumplings.

You're lucky there were no Chinese competitors. (Or Russian, or Turkish, or Georgian, or Korean, or...)
posted by pravit at 1:03 PM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


I am, however, very interested with what the rest of the world thinks of American cuisine and national foods, snark aside.

Luckily, every corn dog is more than balanced out by some of the best BBQ that I've ever eaten.
posted by arcticseal at 1:11 PM on September 27, 2014


American food?

Cornbread.

I never encounter cornbread anywhere else.
posted by The Whelk at 1:19 PM on September 27, 2014


Pumpkin pie, gumbo, chili, crab cakes maybe?, pan-fried chicken, various types of barbeque, Tex-Mex, arguably cheesecake in its present form, etc. There's quite a bit of traditional American food.
posted by The Gaffer at 1:30 PM on September 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


I drive a cab sometimes on the weekends and get a fair number of hungry foreign passengers. I drop them at these tiny little soul food places. They look at me like I am nuts, but in they go. If I see them later in the day, they rave about chitlins and fried pork chops and hushpuppies and cheese grits and rhubarb pie.

And Lobster Rolls up in Maine are not something you see elsewhere.
posted by Mr. Yuck at 1:56 PM on September 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


Wait, is that Dmitri Simakis from Everything is Terrible? To think the Cinefamily is only two blocks away from Canter's Deli!
posted by eschatfische at 1:58 PM on September 27, 2014


I think the BuzzFeed offices are in New York so they are probably pretty familiar with New York bagels. But yes, they deserve to try real (Montreal) bagels.

BuzzFeed had a 'best bagel in NYC' rundown recently but, having had almost all the bagels they listed, their judgments were so wrong it made me angry.

the box matzo ball mix from Manischewitz is pretty awesome.

My grandma's amazing, legendary matzah ball recipe was 'the Manischewitz box mix with seltzer instead or of water'.
posted by Itaxpica at 2:07 PM on September 27, 2014 [5 favorites]


It would kill you to put a link to the other ones?
posted by IndigoJones at 2:30 PM on September 27, 2014


All of my heart to Canters. Oh lord that place was like a revelation to a seven year old me. Chopped liver you say? More, please. Full sour kosher dill pickles? Yes, I can hold my own with those. Whitefish. Pickled tongue. Cod. Pastrami. Brisket. In an industry where the majority of power players are still Jewish, I was the constant goy at dinners because I wouldn't say no to another helping of Baba's special matzah brei, even if it was a little (cough) dry.

A sad little PS: I've been vegetarian for so long that I'd forgotten about Canter's "Fresser's Delight". Sing "I'm An Adult Now" in chorus with me, for the first time I ate an entire one all by myself. I think I was eleven. Fresser = glutton, especially when they come over to your house and eat all your food because you're too nice to say something about them eating all the best bits and favorites in your fridge. I just remember taking an incredibly long nap, first in the back seat of my grandmother's car, then transferred to her guest room, waking up after the sun had gone down and being terribly confused. It's a wonder that I didn't grow up to weigh 400 lbs.
posted by Purposeful Grimace at 2:34 PM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


Needs more kishka!


Someone stole it.




From the butcher shop.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:59 PM on September 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


Rugelach are officially the most delicious. I am also shocked at how popular Manischewitz is because it's vile. (Also, no charoset? Charoset is awesome.)
posted by jeather at 4:02 PM on September 27, 2014


And how come none of these guys ate a nice tongue sandwich? Yum, that's something I find hard to obtain here in the Upper Midwest.
posted by escabeche at 4:03 PM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


I don't know what would be defined as american food aside from corn dogs and hamburgers and that's as dumb as saying italian food is only spaghetti.
posted by poffin boffin at 12:59 PM on September 27 [+] [!]


I wanted to say but--but GREASY HONKY PIE, but then I remembered that that's technically Spanish cuisine. It's kind of an unsettling feeling, like a glitch in the matrix.
posted by darksasami at 4:49 PM on September 27, 2014


I am Catholic and my BFF is Jewish. My BFF's mom sends me matzoh ball soup. I won't learn to make my own because it would like infringe on my BFF's mom's thing. So it is like this super-special treat that I act like a crack addict about.

--

In law school I took a small seminar class on Jewish law and Purim happened to be on a class day. The professor brought us homemade hamentaschen and ice-cold vodka.

Nobody drove home that day. Jeeeeeeeeeeeesus that is a hardcore holiday. I don't even know if the hamentaschen were any good, I was too busy being egged on by a 70-year-old Jewish guy to do more shots. Definitely could not distinguish between "cursed is Haman" and "blessed is Mordecai." Could barely distinguish between my feet and my hands at that point. It was like 3 in the afternoon and I had to flag down a friend to drive me home ... and then back the next morning so I could get my car. I think it was the drunkest I've ever been, and it was school-sanctioned.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 4:53 PM on September 27, 2014 [22 favorites]


Yeah, we Jews are serious about our Drinkin' Holidays, and I think we have more of them than any other religion. I once got to see my friend's black-hatted Chabadnik rabbi do that Russian dance thing where you drop all the way down to the ground and kick out at a very boisterous Simchas Torah celebration.
posted by nonasuch at 5:07 PM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


Not Jewish, but I grew up eating tongue sandwiches. Love those things.
posted by arcticseal at 5:27 PM on September 27, 2014


I was once invited to the party celebrating a friend's very belated Bat Mitzvah (she was an adult mother of two at the time). Anyway...A lot of the food was made by her aunt and was amazing. The chopped liver...omg. I couldn't get enough. Soooo good.
posted by Thorzdad at 5:38 PM on September 27, 2014


I need to know about this apricot-ricotta kugel, nonasuch.

Also right now I'd pretty much kill for a good bowl of matzo ball soup. DAMN YOU BUZZFEED.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 6:35 PM on September 27, 2014


The standard summary of any Jewish holiday is "They tried to kill us, we survived, let's eat!"

The craziest thing about this video was seeing those huge pours of Manischewitz. I thought you always put it in the smallest glasses you owned so you could get through your mandated four cups with as little damage as possible and get on to the good stuff for the rest of the Seder.
posted by dfan at 6:56 PM on September 27, 2014 [4 favorites]


Manischewitz is the shame of our people. THERE ARE OTHER KOSHER WINES GOYIM I PROMISE YOU and some are not a grotesque abomination unto the lord.
posted by poffin boffin at 7:13 PM on September 27, 2014 [6 favorites]


Not fair, having a Jew food tisch while the Yidden are offline for New Year's and Shabbat. Some items I've introduced to goy friends:

Cod and herring caviar, either fresh or lightly salted/smoked, by the ice cream scoopful
Brined gutted matje herring, eaten whole with tail facing away, on buttered dark rye
Sweet wine and onion pickled chopped herring
Golden-smoked white fish, even better as chopped "salad" because no little bones
Potato latkes fried in goose fat with tart applesauce on top
Lacto-fermented garlic full-sour pickles
Lacto-fermented shredded beets and apples in their own brilliant magenta "rossl" vinegar
Braised smoked tongue (my mother once exploded a pressure cooker and set the kitchen on fire, when she forgot to turn the heat down on one of these)
"Kishke" (a turkey or goose neck skin) sausage stuffed with ground onions, carrots, celery, flour and beef fat
Stuffed veal breast
Carrot cake - yes, real shtetl food if it's only shredded carrots, raisins, flour, honey and oil (no canned pineapple, ewwwww). AKA "carrot ring" as a side dish with no cream cheese frosting
posted by Dreidl at 7:22 PM on September 27, 2014 [4 favorites]


THERE ARE OTHER KOSHER WINES GOYIM I PROMISE YOU and some are not a grotesque abomination unto the lord.

My ex-roommate had recently moved back from Israel and told me about all the delicious kosher wines they hoard there. Though I don't know because I went to her parents' for Shabbat dinner a few times and her mother thought that we get too much light, sweet airy breads so she made dense bricks of challah (because Shabbat is supposed to be different from the rest of the week) and also they mixed kosher white and red wines for some reason that I have since blocked from my memory.
posted by jeather at 7:25 PM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


And blintzes.

Then there's Sephardic and Mizrahi cooking....

Let's begin with the Syrian Aleppo tamarind mini-pizzas
posted by Dreidl at 7:27 PM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


Matzo crackers have been my favorite crackers since I was a little kid.
posted by straight at 8:33 PM on September 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


Kasha and varnishkes, anyone? Especially as leftovers, cold, the next day.
posted by adamg at 8:39 PM on September 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


Back when I was a grad student, at the end of Passover when I was sick of matzah, I'd always bring any extra in to campus and leave it in the department lounge -- it would disappear within a day.

These days, my wife (who converted to Judaism) eats it year-round. She likes gefilte fish too (especially with my mother's home-ground horseradish), but has never developed a taste for Manischewitz.
posted by janewman at 8:42 PM on September 27, 2014


Metafilter: crossing paths with ubiquity.
posted by HeroZero at 2:38 AM on September 28, 2014


Yes to the kasha! Recently introduced my Maltese machatunim to the wonder that is kasha fried with mushroom and onion. (There's no word for kasha in Maltese, though. I think my MIL thinks it's barley, or rice.)
posted by prettypretty at 5:07 AM on September 28, 2014


If you're in Canada and are not biased against fruit wines, I can't recommend Rodrigues wine enough. Made in Newfoundland, and it's always been a weird pleasure of mine to bring wine over to friends' parents' house. They'll invite me as a transplant for the holidays, and I'll show up with a bottle of it to their surprise and general delight.
posted by Lemurrhea at 5:14 AM on September 28, 2014


I want to point out that this is all Ashkenazi (Eastern European Jewish) food.

Most of which is traditional northern/eastern european food. Yummy.

Kasha and varnishkes, anyone?

That one might fall in the "let's mix some stuff I found in my pantry when I ran out of everything else" category, though.
posted by effbot at 5:25 AM on September 28, 2014


There's no word for kasha in Maltese, though. I think my MIL thinks it's barley, or rice.

Google tells me buckwheat is "Qamħ saraċin" in Maltese (i.e. "saracen wheat", which is the same as in Spanish/French).
posted by effbot at 5:28 AM on September 28, 2014


"saracen wheat", which is the same as in Spanish/French

Never realised that etymology before.
posted by jeather at 5:43 AM on September 28, 2014


Kasha and varnishkes, anyone? Especially as leftovers, cold, the next day.


Yes and yes!

Two of my favorite things are hard Jewish salami and half-sour pickles, but perhaps the greatest food of all is the humble bialy.

Now, am I the only one who likes the gentile fish jello? Because I will take all y'all's.
posted by Room 641-A at 6:37 AM on September 28, 2014


That one might fall in the "let's mix some stuff I found in my pantry when I ran out of everything else" category, though.

A shonda! Like prettypretty said, just mushrooms and onions.
posted by Room 641-A at 6:42 AM on September 28, 2014


> This made me crave chopped liver. Why don't they like it?

I suspect because it looks like poop. It is super tasty, though.

Solly's chopped liver on a toasted onion (Montreal-style) bagel with lettuce and onion from the Bagel House is my jam. Because of a colleague's extreme revulsion to its appearance (he had a bad experience as a child, apparently, involving a Hungarian grandfather sporting dollops of chopped liver on his facial hair) I will only eat it away from the office.
posted by scruss at 7:39 AM on September 28, 2014 [2 favorites]


Yeah, we Jews are serious about our Drinkin' Holidays, and I think we have more of them than any other religion.

I am convinced that to become an accepted minority in America, you need a good drinking holiday. If you start consider the Germanic and British ties of our foundering fathers, and the gradual mainstream acceptance of every immigrant group from the Irish to the Koreans, this becomes less a mild joke and more a semi-serious thesis.

Or to just quote my favorite movie:
Major Strasser - "What is your nationality?"
Rick - "I'm a drunkard."
Captain Renault - "...and that makes Rick a citizen of the world. "
posted by 1f2frfbf at 11:11 AM on September 28, 2014


Yeah, we Jews are serious about our Drinkin' Holidays, and I think we have more of them than any other religion.

If you are a Polish Jew who marries Irish, you might know what you are talking about. Love, lust, the distance seems surmountable. You stomp on that glass while people cheer and your GMIL tells you that your FIL is "a nice Jewish man." Then you're in trouble. On so many levels.

I don't mean to denigrate either culture. I would like some decent chopped liver with toast points or smoked whitefish salad or real corned beef with cabbage.
posted by Mr. Yuck at 1:56 PM on September 28, 2014


Come to thnk of it, now my gran is dead, I miss the pickled cucumbers. For some reason, I forgot to learn that specific recipe, and where I live, there is only one kosher store which I never manage to get to in opening hours.
Anyone here have a good cucumber-pickling concept?
posted by mumimor at 2:56 PM on September 28, 2014


Anyone here have a good cucumber-pickling concept?

I will be looking out for responses to this one. I have my Nana's dill pickle recipe but the recipe is very vague -- by the time I thought to ask her, she had a bit of dementia. And the one time I tried it, I ended up with a mouldy fermented mess. She also made raisin wine for Pesach -- another vague recipe I really should try someday.

Google tells me buckwheat is "Qamħ saraċin" in Maltese

And dafke it's got one of those silent/glottal "q"s I cannot pronounce!
posted by prettypretty at 4:12 PM on September 28, 2014


OK, true story:

When our second child was born I got my parents to stay at our place and babysit. A day or so later I come home and find them sitting at the table, glowering. I ask what's wrong and my mother complains that I didn't fix dinner (!) (there is like a ton of food in the fridge) (I asked you here to make things easier for me, not harder) (!)

Anyway, being a dutiful son I fix dinner, starting with chicken soup. It's Passover so I decide to make matza balls. Difficulty: no mix. No matza meal. But! There is matza. I quickly grind some up and mix up some matza balls. Now, decent home-made matza balls take time, which is what I didn't have. They were actually pretty tasty, seasoned with freshly chopped dill and parsley, but they were like little dumplings of lead. What could I do, I served them.

More glowering. "What? What?"

My father: silence.
My mother: "Joe! It's just as easy to make them from scratch you know."

Ugh.

Anyway, a couple of years later I serve matza balls for Rosh Hashana. My mother is delighted with them. She compliments my wife. My wife passes her on to me. "Oh, they're very easy," I say, "I have a mnemonic for the recipe." The other guests ask me for the mnemonic.

"It's Oil, Salt, Eggs and Matza. OSEM."

And that's how I make matza balls now.
posted by Joe in Australia at 10:20 PM on September 28, 2014 [1 favorite]


ahaha as a vegetarian who spent a summer in Romania this is so accurate, but the list needs more "garlic sauce? is this just a shot glass of garlic?"

Obviously, that's to repel the vampires!
posted by Anne Neville at 6:40 AM on September 29, 2014


...the box matzo ball mix from Manischewitz is pretty awesome.

Plus it's vegan (assuming you substitute tofu for the eggs in the matzo balls).
posted by ottereroticist at 11:53 AM on September 29, 2014


...the box matzo ball mix from Manischewitz is pretty awesome.

My aunt used to make it with club soda and they were probably the best I've had.
posted by Room 641-A at 12:39 AM on September 30, 2014


So...I dated an Israeli Sephardic Jew for about two years and I came out of it loving more than anything else burekas. I am sad that it wasn't included, but then again I see this thread tells me that it's more of an Ashkenazi jewish food thing they're doing. Although not sure wikipedia agrees...but it does seem to.

Either way, just spreading the bureka love because they are so so so so good.
posted by lizarrd at 3:09 AM on September 30, 2014


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