It's a Twine game. Cats also like Twine. That's all I've got.
November 10, 2014 4:13 PM   Subscribe

Cat Petting Simulator: You see a cat sitting on the back of the couch, licking her paw. Pet that cat.
posted by codacorolla (31 comments total) 16 users marked this as a favorite
 
I win! I petted a cat!

I petted... a virtual... text-simulated... cat.

damn.
posted by ardgedee at 4:22 PM on November 10, 2014


Considering the degree of dudgeon my real cats are in, it's safer to pet an electronic cat right now.
posted by wotsac at 4:25 PM on November 10, 2014


I can't wait to see how many other people named their cat Smarf.
posted by Room 641-A at 4:29 PM on November 10, 2014 [9 favorites]


Nope. I will not clean another litter box, never again. Had to stop there before my allergies started up again.
posted by Splunge at 4:30 PM on November 10, 2014


Even though it was a girl cat I named after my late little boy. And safely avoided the belly trap because he was a cheek and shoulders guy and I could always pet him there. :-)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:32 PM on November 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


It's funny how individualized cat petting is, even though we all recognize the universals. At most of these decision points, the available petting methods didn't include what would be the correct answer for my cat for that situation. ...Which is true to the experience of petting a new cat, I guess.

I have to admit I bailed when it looked like we were heading to litter town.
posted by LobsterMitten at 4:37 PM on November 10, 2014


My cat does not mind the occasional belly pet, but it's better to be safe than sorry, and I do not actually know [Cat Name Here] even though I named her. Even a virtual cat can penetrate the skin with a bite and a kick.
posted by Peach at 4:40 PM on November 10, 2014


Lol, I resisted that dangerously accessible belly but then the litter box came around. Nope, ain't gonna clean it, nope ... damn. OK, closed the tab. Back to Kittens Game for me! (Iron Will Year 2.)
posted by Autumn Leaf at 4:43 PM on November 10, 2014


I got some points but not all of them.

I think it should probably be impossible to get all the points.
posted by aubilenon at 4:44 PM on November 10, 2014 [2 favorites]


We've been away from our cats the past week, house-hunting across the country.

This game is nice... but sadly, no substitute for actual kitty scritching.
posted by metaquarry at 5:17 PM on November 10, 2014


Sometimes you gotta just get in there and rub the belly even though you know it's a trap and that the kitty is just waiting for an opportunity to do a playful bite and rake. Yeah the skin gets broken every once in a while but that just lets the toxoplasmosis collected when the cat scratches the box after pooping to enter your blood stream easier.

I swear the brain parasites aren't tell me to write this.
posted by vuron at 5:37 PM on November 10, 2014 [8 favorites]


I rubbed the belly four times, got light pushback once, didn't get at all scratched. Go for the belly skritches!

There never was an option to rub by face on her fur, though.
posted by gadge emeritus at 5:45 PM on November 10, 2014


The game took me to confusedcatsagainstfeminism.tumblr.com

Not sure what to make of that.
posted by ryanrs at 6:03 PM on November 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


I pet Pico all over and I got to eat fries!!!
posted by avocet at 6:26 PM on November 10, 2014


woah, avocet, I just had to blink a couple of times before I was sure that was your comment and not one I had somehow posted without realizing it. My cat was (and real cat is) a Pico too!
posted by bethnull at 6:36 PM on November 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


And now I want fries.
posted by bethnull at 6:40 PM on November 10, 2014


This sounded awesome! Then I went to the page, and it was... Text.

Please post again with a graphical cat simulator.
posted by el io at 6:41 PM on November 10, 2014 [7 favorites]


I went into this all not-sure-I-see-the-point-of-a-text-only-cat-simulator, and then I just had a giant grin on my face for the whole thing and kept going "awww! kitten!"

Far truer to the experience of actually petting a cat then I expected a Twine game to be.
posted by moss at 6:43 PM on November 10, 2014


I found the text disturbingly pornlike.
posted by ottereroticist at 7:48 PM on November 10, 2014 [10 favorites]


I found the text awesomely pornlike.
posted by desuetude at 7:54 PM on November 10, 2014 [7 favorites]


Kept expecting/hoping this would open up to Candy Box levels of complexity and adventure. Nope, just cat petting. Does exactly what it says on the tin.
posted by buriednexttoyou at 8:44 PM on November 10, 2014 [1 favorite]


The belly is fine! She loves it!
posted by steganographia at 12:37 AM on November 11, 2014


About ten years ago I read an interview with Shigeru Miyamoto (creator of Mario). I can't find the link. It was about how the Wii was created because Nintendo had decided that the hard-core gamer market was tapped out and that Nintendo wanted to get little kids and older people to play games.

In the interview, he talked about an idea he had for a cat simulation game, for older people. This involved a real, physical robot cat that looked just like a real cat. You'd give it to old people and they could pet it and feed it, etc. Then after a time, the cat would start talking to the old person. It would ask to be pet more, or fed at different times, or whatever. The cat would never talk to the person when other people were around, so it would be a secret between the cat and the older person.

The idea was that it would become a companion for the older person, stimulate the brain and thus lead to a healthier and happier life for the old person. It was such a great idea, even if it was unfeasible. Wish I could find that article.
posted by nushustu at 1:42 AM on November 11, 2014 [4 favorites]


The cat would never talk to the person when other people were around, so it would be a secret between the cat and the older person.

Wait, but when the older person is like 'my cat talks', and the visitor is like 'oh, really, show me', and the older person is like 'well, it doesn't talk around other people'... And then the older folks come off as crazy robot cat lady. (or the older person recruits their cat to commit crimes)
posted by el io at 2:47 AM on November 11, 2014 [1 favorite]


OK, the name they gave me for my cat is my wife's name. Accident?
posted by dlugoczaj at 7:45 AM on November 11, 2014


Wait, but when the older person is like 'my cat talks', and the visitor is like 'oh, really, show me', and the older person is like 'well, it doesn't talk around other people'... And then the older folks come off as crazy robot cat lady.

I seem to recall that the family of the old person was in on the idea, so they would either act like it wasn't crazy, or would act like they couldn't hear the cat. Either way, the point was to give this old person something to do that nobody else could do, because the old person was the only one capable of helping the cat since he/she was the only one that could hear it.
posted by nushustu at 7:47 AM on November 11, 2014


Cat petting porn.
Jeez. Litter box cleaning porn.
posted by SLC Mom at 7:49 AM on November 11, 2014


The cat would never talk to the person when other people were around, so it would be a secret between the cat and the older person.

"You gotta believe me! When you aren't watching, the cat puts on a top hat and a cane, and sings Hello My Ragtime Gal!"
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 11:32 AM on November 11, 2014 [4 favorites]


[through clenched teeth] The name of the song is Hello! Ma Baby

It would be fun if they modeled a few different cats. Play through again and you get a tortoiseshell who switches between affection and whirlwind-of-pain with no warning. Another time and it's a Cornish Rex who loves that you're warm. Or maybe a tabby kitten who will purr like crazy until it falls asleep in your arms ... if you can catch it!
posted by aubilenon at 11:59 AM on November 11, 2014 [1 favorite]


The thing that I found interesting in this as a game was that if you've ever petted a cat then you're probably conditioned to avoid the belly at all costs. But this virtual cat loves having its belly rubbed. It's cool that it plays with expectations like that.
posted by codacorolla at 12:06 PM on November 11, 2014 [1 favorite]


Pffftttt!

Went for the cat, left because of the text.

I WANT A REAL KITTY!
posted by BlueHorse at 12:33 PM on November 11, 2014


« Older Bingo has the hots for you, Jane, for sure.   |   Why would a compulsive Elf-chronicler need... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments