February 4, 2002

10:37 AM

Nike Air Jordan XVII priced at 200.00. Nike unviels this years prize court shoe that comes complete with metal carrying case and CD. But $200? Thats a wholelota Doritos yo!
posted by Brilliantcrank (54 comments total)

Takes a lot of Vietnamese kids to weld that metal box together, man. I think the shoes are worth the price. Those Nike guys have got a whole lot of expenses, man
posted by matteo at 10:41 AM on February 4, 2002

Wow... So, they're made out of gold or platinum, right?
posted by SweetJesus at 10:43 AM on February 4, 2002

Well I guess all the wiggers of the world can rejoice now.

And why do a pair of shoes need a cd? Whats on this cd, music?

If I purchased the shoes and brought them onto a plane would they take the metal carrying case away from me, because it can be used as a bludgeon?
posted by Keen at 10:44 AM on February 4, 2002

The CD is for the software updates.

Duh!
posted by NortonDC at 10:46 AM on February 4, 2002

No they would probably bludgeon you with it for buying the damn shoes:)
posted by bittennails at 10:47 AM on February 4, 2002

Wow, it contains everything I hate about our culture in one easy to carry box (instantenemy on FP).
posted by walrus at 10:47 AM on February 4, 2002

And it (cd) also teaches you how to tie your shoes, installs drivers and such.
posted by bittennails at 10:49 AM on February 4, 2002

Waste of money. Not to mention the fact that, well, they are horrendously ugly! It boggles my mind why people waste massive amounts of money on the stupidest—and ugliest—things. (Normally I'll take performance over appearance but, for $200 shoes, I want the full package.)

There is no way you can tell me that wearing those makes me look cool. In fact I would argue that wearing those over-priced clodhoppers makes me anything but cool. (How's about stupid, naive, a victim of the consumer herding instict, ..etc.)

I hate Nike and I haven't even started on the child labour issue. Gaaaarrrrgh!!!
posted by Dark Messiah at 10:59 AM on February 4, 2002

Is it just me or do the Jordan shoes get progressively uglier each year? If I had the money, I'd probably buy 10 pairs, put up in the attic for ten years and go sell them in Japan for $2000 US. Sounds like a reasonably sound investment.
posted by ttrendel at 11:00 AM on February 4, 2002

If you're a pretty good basketball player, $15 shoes from Pic 'n' Pay will do just fine. If you're average, $200 shoes aren't going to make you enough better to justify the expense. But then, nobody who'd blow $200 this way is capable of such common sense, so I'm pissing to windward here.
posted by alumshubby at 11:02 AM on February 4, 2002

For $200 you can get a GREAT pair of russet wingtips from Johnston and Murphy; they'll last forever, look like 007 personally vetted them, and feel like oleo on your feet.
posted by UncleFes at 11:07 AM on February 4, 2002

Same goes for a decent pair of workboots, which will have steel toes, handy for kicking the crap out of that dickhead who paid 200 bucks for $3.50 of canvas and plastic.
posted by dong_resin at 11:14 AM on February 4, 2002

They are actually appear to be subscription based sneakers. The logo on the CD is the same logo as Real's MusicNet. $200 plus $9.95/mo equals one helluva business model.

Maybe I can bring underoos back with rocking soundtrack...
posted by pedantic at 11:22 AM on February 4, 2002

Whoops! This is the working MusicNet link.
posted by pedantic at 11:25 AM on February 4, 2002

"It comes in its own metal case..."

Which is a very convenient blunt object for someone to use when they smash you over the head with it and take your 200 dollar (ugly ass) shoes.

posted by almostcool at 11:25 AM on February 4, 2002

I own exactly two pairs of shoes. One elcheapo $30 pair of dress shoes for when work requires such things and a $15 pair of army issue troop trainers than I wear about 14hrs a day. The boots are the most comfortable thing I've ever worn, and this is only my 3rd pair after wearing them for 10yrs now. I cannot even conceive of paying $200 for shoes. To each his (or her) own I suppose...
posted by revbrian at 11:26 AM on February 4, 2002

What's on the CD?

Well for starters, the graphic is of a spacer for 45rpm vinyl singles. I haven't seen one of those in nearly 20 years. Think anyone in the target market has ever seen one?

I remember owning a pair of the second round of Air Jordans in 1987 or 88. They were black and blue (these were recently reissued, although I swear the proportions are different). I stopped wearing Nikes in college when I started paying for my own clothing. Later, after moving to New York, I bought a pair of Nikes on a clearance rack somewhere. They wore out in 2 weeks.
posted by joemaller at 11:27 AM on February 4, 2002

You guys seem to not understand. Don't any of you remember elementary/middle school? These cool shoes will undoubtedly make you faster and able to jump higher in basketball. Lord knows when I had my Nike Air (with the air bubbles on the bottom), I also floated through the air like #23. Silly Mefi-ans, don't you know basic physics?
posted by owillis at 11:29 AM on February 4, 2002

Mmmm... landfill.

If I bought these you can bet that that stupid metal case would sit in the back of my closet for many, many years until I finally relented and tossed it in the garbage or sent it off to GoodWill.

Hm...but can I even wear these shoes? They're not for girls, are they? It looks like only strippers could afford them.
posted by amanda at 11:30 AM on February 4, 2002

Well for starters, the graphic is of a spacer for 45rpm vinyl singles. I haven't seen one of those in nearly 20 years. Think anyone in the target market has ever seen one?

The logo on the CD is the same logo as Real's MusicNet.

Point proven.
posted by joemaller at 11:31 AM on February 4, 2002

Hey Keen, what's up with the racist language?
posted by acornface at 11:39 AM on February 4, 2002

Just you wait 'till these guys get a hold of a pair.

You can already see what they had to say about other 'Jordan brand' shoes.
posted by zpousman at 11:43 AM on February 4, 2002

"Hey Keen, what's up with the racist language?"

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

I had to do a doubletake on that one also.
posted by bradth27 at 11:45 AM on February 4, 2002

These cost about $7 a pair (just the shoes plus packaging, not the rest of whatever comes with them) to produce. Now that Nike's cut down on their security at the sweatshops and maquiladores - not worth spending too much to keep your underpaid employees from stealing $7 shoes, I guess - you can buy them pretty readily for about $15 a pair all over Asia. I saw very nice seemingly real (as opposed to the everpresent obvious fakes) Nike Airs for this price in two stalls at Chatuchak Market in Bangkok, and also at street stalls in Chiang Mai.
posted by luriete at 11:48 AM on February 4, 2002

They look like... ski boots. And they're about as expensive.
posted by atsarazin at 12:50 PM on February 4, 2002

From Ironic Times:

Nike Unveils $200 Air Jordans
Each shoe can feed the person who made it for a year.
posted by ferris at 1:05 PM on February 4, 2002

Somehow, I think I may have the following dream tonite....

Mars Blackmon: Money, it's gotta be the shoes!
MJ: No Mars, it's not the shoes...I need cash to pay that $200 mil to Juanita.
posted by PeteyStock at 1:15 PM on February 4, 2002

Am I missing something? What's so funny?
posted by acornface at 1:22 PM on February 4, 2002

200 smackers? That'd buy me about two years worth of Chuck Taylors... (and actually it did -- I loaded up the closet when I heard they were shutting the Converse plant down.) Of course, I don't have a nifty bullet-proof box to carry 'em in, and in my neighborhood, sometimes I wish I did...
posted by spilon at 1:23 PM on February 4, 2002

Back in the day, kids were getting killed for Jordan IV's. Now would-be thieves will have to severe your hand-cuffed wrist from the case too.

I think the vinyl spacer logo is supposed to tie in with the marketing of the shoes, basketball/jazz themed commercials by Spike "Gotta-work-to-sit-courstide-at-the-Garden" Lee.
posted by uftheory at 1:24 PM on February 4, 2002

Is this shoe really that bad? Last time I stopped by one of those athletic shoes stores at the mall every shoe looked like a UFO and cost almost $100. Granted, these are twice the price, but to the people who regularly drop $100 on a pair of sneakers every so often probably don't see this as such a huge rip-off as I do.

If the insane shoe market is the problem then what's the solution. Protest outside Foot Locker? Tell people that Nike is actually not cool? It ain't gonna work.
posted by skallas at 1:33 PM on February 4, 2002

Hey! I think going to the mall and prostesting outside Footlocker is a great idea! Then we'll all go next-door and demand that people not pay four bucks for a cookie.
mmmmmmmm......
mall cookies.......
posted by bradth27 at 1:37 PM on February 4, 2002

Buggin' Out: You almost knocked me down man, the word is "excuse me."
Clifton: Ah, excuse me, I'm sorry.
Buggin' Out: Not only did ya knock me down, you stepped on my brand new white Air Jordan's I just bought, and that's all you can say is "excuse me"?
Clifton: What, are you serious?
Buggin' Out: Yeah, I'm serious, I'll f*ck you up quick two times!

from Do the Right Thing, 1989
posted by grabbingsand at 1:42 PM on February 4, 2002

Like owillis mentioned, dont ya'll remember elementary/middle school? These are the tiny people who will be begging their parents to buy these ugly things.

Having the 'cool' shoes on the playground was essential when i went to school (late 80's/early 90's). I got teased so many times for my Kangaroo's with the secret pocket that i went home one day and cried to my grandmother that i didn't have a pair of Air Jordans (since I knew she was the only person who would buy me such a ridiculous pair of shoes).

She finally gave in....... but while at the store i decided to get a 8-bit NES instead - I bet the shoes wouldn't have lasted as long as that thing did.
posted by ewwgene at 1:44 PM on February 4, 2002

For that price you can buy some good quality (not excellent or superb, they cost more) italian leather shoes, original, not made-in-3rdworldcountry.

Dunno you but I prefer a comfortable leather shoe then a overprice plastic bag wrapped around my feets
posted by elpapacito at 1:57 PM on February 4, 2002

elpapacito, finally there is something in this world you and I agree on.
posted by UncleFes at 2:27 PM on February 4, 2002

Hey Keen, what's up with the racist language?

Acornface, you could just email and ask him, rather than change the direction of the thread to perceived 'racism'.
posted by Karl at 2:35 PM on February 4, 2002

Nothing like a mailto: link to turn on the spam firehose.
posted by Mid at 2:42 PM on February 4, 2002

Oops, that wasn't my intention, I was just trying to suggest an alternative to opening up the 'racism' can o' worms. Matt do you want to delete the mailto?
posted by Karl at 2:44 PM on February 4, 2002

Speaking of alternatives... as athletic shoes over the years have become uglier and uglier, and correspondingly more expensive, my favorite shoe trend of the last decade or so is the simple genius of Teva, which sparked a sandal revival throughout the US. Since then, minimalists have enjoyed a flip-flop renaissance, and there is an even more economical and earth-friendly movement afoot.
posted by Tubes at 3:17 PM on February 4, 2002

*cough* *cough* ... Simple, Tubes? Well...

I'm a fan of going barefoot, myself. Unfortunately, people seem to think you're some kind of freak, like it's completely unnatural. Hm.
posted by whatnotever at 3:41 PM on February 4, 2002

These kinds of shoes aren't marketed to us. It's like arguing on Slashdot about the effectiveness of Febreeze against pet odors.
posted by glenwood at 3:42 PM on February 4, 2002

Wow, it took 3 clicks to actually see a pair of the ugly, hi-tech sandals at Teva.

Tee hee.
posted by glenwood at 3:44 PM on February 4, 2002

If people are going to wear sandals, there needs to be a licensing procedure. There are too many people with horrid looking toes that need to be covered - pronto!
posted by owillis at 3:48 PM on February 4, 2002

Uhm the Teva sandals..I've seen almost exactly the same models in Germany one year ago for $30 and I bought them. I meet owillis licensing protocols and I'm happy with them.
posted by elpapacito at 5:03 PM on February 4, 2002

Opps. Sorry for the confusion, if you've never seen the term wigger, be thankful. It almost always refers to a male white teenager who acts stereotypically black. Like by speaking ebonics, trying to play basketball, and driving Honda Civics with ugly lights or ugly stickers or ugly paintjobs.

Next time you go to any fast food place look for wiggers. You can tell by the $200 shoes they wear because it makes them cool, and the fact that scooping french fries is their career.
posted by Keen at 6:08 PM on February 4, 2002

Plenty of dummy gang bangers out there who will gladly surrender their drug money to identy with MJ.
posted by {savg*pncl} at 6:29 PM on February 4, 2002

A flip-flop renaissance.

A renaissance for the flip-flop.

Flip-flop renaissance.

Sorry, just had to turn that over in my mind a bit. Great band name, I think.
posted by amanda at 7:38 PM on February 4, 2002

Ugly shoes, oversized pants, oversized and oh-so ugly shoes, bubble jackets (in the summer), backwards hat (with, or without bandana underneath), and incomprehensible street jargon—the calling card of the 'wigger'.

Frankly, I find them entertaining. Except when the refer to me as "guy". Then I get irate. "Hey, I've got a name...GUY!"

Yeah, kids 'n wiggers are the only people who will buy these shoes. Although I'd give the intelligence advantage to the kids, as they don't pretend that being from a well-to-do middle-class family implies they are "ghetto" and "street, yo" (yes, the "yo" is required).
posted by Dark Messiah at 7:58 PM on February 4, 2002

I'm waiting for Air Maravich myself. Just a $30 pair of Chuck Taylors. Never out of style, coz they were never in style to begin with. I love em.
posted by jonmc at 8:32 PM on February 4, 2002

jonmc, you'll never see Air Maravich shoes. The material costs are too high 'cause it takes three to make two.

[rimshot]
posted by mr_crash_davis at 8:49 PM on February 4, 2002

Whatnotever, I had the classic Tevas in mind. Those overdesigned beasties you found are... unfortunate.

Yeah, barefooters get some funny looks but that's part of the fun, right? Plus you can save your $200 basketball shoes for the court...
posted by Tubes at 10:26 PM on February 4, 2002

Air Jordan XVII's? They've had XVI updates to the original? Damn. Where've I been.

They might as well stop numbering them and putting out a yearly model, like it's a car or something.

The New 2002 Jordan, from Nike.
Quality Transportation for the Discerning Social Climber.
Each pair comes with their own steel garage.
posted by chicobangs at 10:48 PM on February 4, 2002

hey tubes, love the sanuk flops. though the new ones are kind of funky, my old basic black foam-and-rubber sanuks are the most comfortable flops i've ever owned.
posted by mich9139 at 10:48 AM on February 5, 2002