Money in the Harry Potter Universe

December 14, 2014 10:17 PM

While there has been speculation and answers about how money works in the Harry Potter universe, no one has ever written about how the witches and wizards in the books might manage their personal finances after the end of the series. Until now.
posted by Hactar (33 comments total)

That is possibly my favorite Harry Potter fic series ever.
posted by immlass at 10:48 PM on December 14, 2014 [4 favorites]

I would just like to point out that some issues with this system have been raised and addressed in some detail.
posted by cthuljew at 10:57 PM on December 14, 2014 [15 favorites]

Wow, I am flying straight down a rabbit hole here. Thanks cthuljew; I didn't really need to sleep tonight anyways.
posted by protocoach at 11:45 PM on December 14, 2014 [1 favorite]

As with everything, a vaguely relevant Achewood
posted by dismas at 4:27 AM on December 15, 2014 [8 favorites]

Better than all of them losing their knuts and sickles an alternate universe Potter scheme run by a modern day Barmy Mugglloff.
posted by Buttons Bellbottom at 5:45 AM on December 15, 2014 [2 favorites]

Hah, I see I'm not the only Neville fan.
posted by Buttons Bellbottom at 5:49 AM on December 15, 2014

I would just like to point out that some issues with this system have been raised and addressed in some detail.

Nothing would have brought me more joy then seeing Harry then proceed to introduction the fractional banking system to Magical England.

I mean, seriously, why are the Weasleys poor? They're wizards; they can conjure out of thin air, make a car fly, but can't negotiate a low interest loan?
posted by leotrotsky at 5:51 AM on December 15, 2014 [6 favorites]

Lee’s job is to monitor unauthorized discussion of the wizarding world on Twitter
[...]
Tumblr is ridiculously problematic. Luckily, most of the Muggles don’t realize that a good 10 percent of the kids who put “Third-year wizard!” in their Tumblr profiles are telling the truth.

So I love this.
posted by jeather at 6:07 AM on December 15, 2014 [2 favorites]

The ones I've read so far are so good I'm saving the rest for later.
posted by hawthorne at 6:48 AM on December 15, 2014

These were really good. Thanks for posting.
posted by Pope Guilty at 6:56 AM on December 15, 2014

Ron was still desperately unclear on what the internet actually was, but Rose explained that she had found a website that seemed to have information about their lives, and that one of the pieces of information was that her daddy was a time-traveling Dumbledore.
[...]
[A]nd then [Hermione] said something to Ron about how she’d have to take care of that website later

If The Toast goes down, we know who to blame now.

Ronbledore 4eva.
posted by jeather at 7:01 AM on December 15, 2014 [6 favorites]

These are excellent. But what I want to know is how to get a job writing fic for pay.

Because I've got a ::cough:: novel about post-Winter reconstruction-era Narnia I'd love to get a bigger readership for...
posted by suelac at 8:33 AM on December 15, 2014 [7 favorites]

suelac, I don't know about Carpetbaggers, but if Neil Gaiman managed to publish The Problem of Susan without getting sued I'm pretty sure The Cave in Deerfield has a shot.

(omg hi I love your Narnia fics I almost went and reccced them to you before I checked your profile)
posted by bettafish at 8:47 AM on December 15, 2014

Oh neat, suelac I also loved Carpetbaggers! Lovely to see you here!

Those who enjoy picking over the incongruities in the Potterverse might also enjoy cantankerous Potter essayist J.Odell's exploration of why poverty exists in the wizarding world.
posted by Wretch729 at 9:05 AM on December 15, 2014

Wait yay Reconstruction Narnia sounds awesome and so I have gotten all the fics from this thread!
posted by corb at 9:21 AM on December 15, 2014 [1 favorite]

I mean, seriously, why are the Weasleys poor? They're wizards; they can conjure out of thin air, make a car fly, but can't negotiate a low interest loan?

They most likely already have something like that; in the parlance of enchanted folk, in place of a lien there would be a geas.
posted by Smart Dalek at 9:30 AM on December 15, 2014 [1 favorite]

bettafish:
but if Neil Gaiman managed to publish The Problem of Susan without getting sued I'm pretty sure The Cave in Deerfield has a shot

Thank you! And you know, you're right, there's no explicit reference to Narnia in it. Nor even any lions or witches.

But I do think the story misses out a little bit without the discovery the Pevensies make in the dungeons of the Witch's castle in Carpetbaggers...
posted by suelac at 9:36 AM on December 15, 2014

Is Gringotts too centralized for you? Join the Stellarmus network! Harry Potter and the Cryptocurrency of Stars
posted by mbrubeck at 9:37 AM on December 15, 2014 [1 favorite]

And thank you Wretch729! Yeah, I've been here for a year or so, since my workplace blocked nearly all my social media accounts. (It's vital for my mental health to be able to talk to non-bureaucrats occasionally.)
posted by suelac at 9:37 AM on December 15, 2014

I'm actually a little confused by the Dean Thomas story - is the ending that he's with a bunch of lawyers who are secretly loan sharks gamblers?
posted by corb at 9:50 AM on December 15, 2014

The Dean Thomas story is the only one (as far as I know) that crosses over with another universe, specifically with the TV show How To Get Away With Murder. Dean changes his name and becomes Wes from HTGAWM.
posted by pie ninja at 9:59 AM on December 15, 2014 [2 favorites]

corb - judging by the tags on the the story and the timing of its publication I suspect it's a reference to the new ABC show How to Get Away with Murder. I haven't seen the show so I don't know the reference, but that'd be my guess.
posted by Wretch729 at 9:59 AM on December 15, 2014

Trust a ninja to beat me to the answer.
posted by Wretch729 at 10:01 AM on December 15, 2014 [1 favorite]

corb, it's a fusion with How to Get Away with Murder, which co-stars Dean's actor Alfie Enoch.

ETA: ninja'ed twice!
posted by bettafish at 10:01 AM on December 15, 2014

The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas the Wizarding World
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 10:06 AM on December 15, 2014 [1 favorite]

I mean, seriously, why are the Weasleys poor? They're wizards

That pretty much sums up all the occultists I know.
posted by malocchio at 10:15 AM on December 15, 2014 [2 favorites]

More Potterverse worldbuilding previously on Metafilter.
posted by Wretch729 at 10:28 AM on December 15, 2014

Ahhhhhhh. I hadn't heard of that show so was super confused. Good to know, thanks!
posted by corb at 10:34 AM on December 15, 2014

The Ginny one was great! Really nicely written, and true to both the characters AND to, well, reality. Ginny's experiences as written here ring true to me. Well done.

Also, regarding Harry:

He knew how to be a father in the sense that you took a picture with your arms around your child’s mother, and then your child looked at the picture later.

Razor sharp, in my opinion.
posted by dirtdirt at 10:38 AM on December 15, 2014 [5 favorites]

“This is really more of a question for the Economics of Potion-Making, I guess. What time are econ lessons here?”

“We have no economics lessons in this school, you ridiculous boy.”

Harry Potter stood up bravely. “We do now. Come with me if you want to learn about market forces!”

—Ayn Rand’s Harry Potter and The Sorcerer’s Stone (previously)
posted by mbrubeck at 10:49 AM on December 15, 2014

Lee Jordon's was particularly poignant. Especially this:

Lee did not know how to say to his children that the future would bring them careers they had never heard of, working on things that did not currently exist. He did not know what to say about following dreams when the things they were dreaming about were already in the past.

Life would be so much easier if adults could tell children, "We have no idea what you'll be, you have no idea what you'll be. Enjoy life and be willing to try. But don't get twisted if who you wanted to be when you're ten doesn't exist when you're forty."
posted by teleri025 at 3:44 PM on December 15, 2014 [2 favorites]

"She was the human equivalent of that psychological game where the word red is written in the color blue; people kept commenting on her “beautiful Chinese accent,” or occasionally “beautiful Japanese accent,” and nobody ever guessed that she was Scottish until she told them." (Cho Chang)

I laughed out loud for a good minute. So true. I have seen this happen with ethnic Chinese who learned their English in Jamaica.
posted by d. z. wang at 8:39 PM on December 15, 2014 [3 favorites]

These were far far better than I had expected. Great post.
posted by Ber at 7:52 AM on December 16, 2014