"You just blew [our minds], little dude!"

December 23, 2014 5:44 PM

Princess Bride: An Adorable Little Kid Just Came Up With The Best Fan Theory Ever OMG! The Princess Bride is one of those childhood classics that, no matter how many times you see it, you notice something new almost every viewing. Fan theories grow and thrive with these types of movies, and no matter if they're right or wrong, there's always going to be someone trying to justify or nullify the existence of these theories. Which brings us to a fan theory of just where The Princess Bride is going with its charmingly cryptic ending. Larry Young, co-founder of comic company AiT/Planet Lar and author of Astronauts In Trouble: Live From The Moon, shared his son's insightful speculation on the real story behind The Princess Bride. And all we're saying is, this kid is on to something. Larry Young broke the story himself on Facebook.

Inconceivable! Beat you to it.

posted by spock (77 comments total)

Is this a kissing thread?
posted by wabbittwax at 5:50 PM on December 23, 2014 [24 favorites]

GRANDFATHER
-- wait, just wait --

THE KID
-- well, when does it get good?

GRANDFATHER
Keep your shirt on. Let me read.

(via)
posted by spock at 5:57 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

It's one of the top three kissing threads in the history of kissing threads.

( The Princess Bride is probably one of the most successful movie adaptations ever, probably cause the author was one of the more respected screenwriters ever and the actual movie is like 90% what's in the text with only things stripped out, like Fezzik's childhood , and the book itself is a great way to demonstrate clear action and narrator joking - you loose some of the meta fictional stuff in the translation, where the author is pretending its a real story HE'S translating and leaving out the boring stuff or the contradictory stuff ...but you get some of that with the framing device in the movie.)
posted by The Whelk at 6:00 PM on December 23, 2014 [6 favorites]

I just saw this in the theater (it's a favorite) and on the big screen, I realized how low-budget it looks.
It's perfect.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 6:02 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

Apparently the movie didn't do too well when it first came out; Cary Elwes says it was a good ten years before people started recognizing him and quoting the lines.

It didn't help that the movie poster only showed Peter Falk and Fred Savage; not exactly the most compelling image.
posted by redsparkler at 6:04 PM on December 23, 2014 [4 favorites]

I honestly never found the ending even remotely cryptic. I mean after reading that story to your grandkid, of course you're gonna say "as you wish" to them the next time they ask for anything. Just cause Falk looks conspiratorial doesn't necessarily make it so. Dude had a glass eye. He always looked like that.
posted by wabbittwax at 6:09 PM on December 23, 2014 [29 favorites]

I think the kid's theory is a little too literal-minded... I mean, he's a kid, so that's expected. Maybe that's just my boring old-person opinion though.
posted by subdee at 6:13 PM on December 23, 2014 [2 favorites]

The princess bride also has the best sword fight coreography in film
posted by The Whelk at 6:14 PM on December 23, 2014 [13 favorites]

Yeah, I've never heard of the ending as "cryptic" before this, it sounds kinda like someone is shoehorning in the idea to explain a problem that isn't there. Anyway, I cannot stand "fan theories", something about them drives me crazy. This isn't really one of those, just a cute observation from a kid who is a little fuzzy on the difference between narrative and meta-narrative. Or maybe he isn't fuzzy, just making a joke, which is just as charming. Anyway, carry on talking about how awesome The Princess Bride is, which is the real point of the post.
posted by skewed at 6:21 PM on December 23, 2014 [3 favorites]

You guys, I read the book and hung out with Cary Else's, so now I have anecdotes about EVERYTHING.
posted by redsparkler at 6:22 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

The Fight Between Inigo and Roberts
Fencing Language In The Princess Bride
How Does Thibault Cancel Out Capoferro?
Grading Fight Scenes: Princess Bride (1 of 2) and The Princesss Bride (2 of 2)
Why Intent Matters: The Sword Fights Of The Princess Bride - or, Why Inigo vs. The Man In Black Isn't the Greatest Fight In The Movie.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 6:22 PM on December 23, 2014 [29 favorites]

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.
posted by hal9k at 6:24 PM on December 23, 2014 [13 favorites]

Yeah, no, that's gilding the lily, but I say any fan theory that enriches your experience of the work is fine by me.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 6:31 PM on December 23, 2014 [6 favorites]

I must be cranky because this theory just makes me say "harrumph." It's zany in a way that doesn't fit the framing story, and it complicates an otherwise perfect ending. The movie benefits from the contrast between the everyday experience of a kid being stuck at home, bored and sick, and the lively goofiness of the story being read. The grandpa getting his grandson into the story is a great illustration of literature and imagination transforming a boring and isolating experience into something fun, exciting, and meaningful. "As you wish" caps it off because sharing that experience with someone is a wonderful, loving thing to do. Throw in real-life pirate dynasties, and suddenly it's an anything-goes Gilliamesque fever dream that sucks all the meaning out of the ritual of reading a child a story, because the "magic of reading" does not stand a chance against the magic of being a friggin' pirate. It's like if Hagrid came in and read a story for a whole day and then said "yer a wizard." Jesus, Hagrid, what did you read me this thing for?

Points for making me imagine Peter Falk as a swashbuckler, though. That's delightful.
posted by knuckle tattoos at 6:38 PM on December 23, 2014 [14 favorites]

The kid's take is very meta. Hilarious how many MeFite's are too cool to give him props for just making that clever connection at his age (regardless of whether it is "right" or you agree with it. ) PS... if you can find a source that makes this connection prior to the kid, please pass it along.
posted by spock at 6:41 PM on December 23, 2014 [3 favorites]

Well, it's better that he said "as you wish" instead of "inconceivable!", right?
posted by oneswellfoop at 6:43 PM on December 23, 2014 [3 favorites]

Why Intent Matters: The Sword Fights Of The Princess Bride - or, Why Inigo vs. The Man In Black Isn't the Greatest Fight In The Movie.

I would argue that the four seconds in which he dispatches four men (presumably trained swordsmen) is the greatest fight in the movie, because it combines both the flashy "Ha ha, I am so much better with you" moves (albeit only five) of the Westley-Inigo fight with the revelation that Inigo Montoya is not just a dueler, he is a killer. Once you've seen him dispatch four men while just barely taking his eyes off Rugen once, you know that he is going to kill Rugen. The fight between them is a formality, because Inigo is ready for any dirty trick, any vile calumny, any number of blades in his way.
posted by Etrigan at 6:45 PM on December 23, 2014 [13 favorites]

Naw, the fight between Wesley and Inigo is the best fight because it has the best in-fight banter. True fact.

"I am not left-handed either!"
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 6:46 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

Although "I want my father back, you son of a bitch." is a pretty good line too.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 6:47 PM on December 23, 2014 [24 favorites]

It's "a pretty good line" because it is that is only line that is not comedic in the whole freaking screenplay (to which anyone who has lost someone important, can attest). That line hits hard. That line is the point of the movie. The time will come when the kid will want his story-reading grandfather back, too. He just doesn't appreciate that yet.
posted by spock at 6:50 PM on December 23, 2014 [53 favorites]

If the kid's theory had even a shred of credibility the grandfather would've said, "I'll most likely kill you in the morning."
posted by wabbittwax at 6:51 PM on December 23, 2014 [26 favorites]

Too obvious, then. You have to trust your audience to connect the dots, even if it takes years and a prescient little kid to do it for you.
posted by spock at 6:54 PM on December 23, 2014

The point of him saying As You Wish is to point out the parallels between the devotion Whatshisface had for Princess Whatever and the grandfather (the storyteller)'s love of the kid. The grandfather serves the kid with the same purity of heart and just as that insane love is the driver of the story in the fictional world, that love drives the grandfather to tell the stories in the real world. In that sense he IS the Dred Pirate Roberts. But not, like, in an Army of Darkness way.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 6:55 PM on December 23, 2014 [17 favorites]

I got to watch the Princess Bride with my nephews and niece a few weeks ago. As we were putting it in, we were like, "Why is this rated PG?" We puzzled and puzzled over it... until we got to "I want my father back you son of a—" and the kids all dissolved into nervous giggles.

(It was worth it.)
posted by BrashTech at 6:57 PM on December 23, 2014

... My name is Inigo Montoya, and this is my BOOMSTICK!
posted by wabbittwax at 6:57 PM on December 23, 2014 [5 favorites]

Anybody want a peanut?
posted by Glinn at 6:59 PM on December 23, 2014 [4 favorites]

Stop that! I mean it!
posted by wabbittwax at 7:00 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

As we were putting it in, we were like, "Why is this rated PG?" We puzzled and puzzled over it... until we got to "I want my father back you son of a—"

You got past the part where a dude is tortured to death without realizing that this isn't really a G-rated movie?
posted by Etrigan at 7:00 PM on December 23, 2014 [7 favorites]

Tortured mostly to death
posted by wabbittwax at 7:02 PM on December 23, 2014 [41 favorites]

MIRACLE MAX
Now, mostly dead is slightly
alive. Now, all dead...well, with
all dead, there's usually only
one thing that you can do.

INIGO
What's that?

He stops pumping.

MIRACLE MAX
Go through his clothes and look
for loose change.
posted by spock at 7:05 PM on December 23, 2014 [2 favorites]

The book makes it very clear that (in its continuity) The Princess Bride is historical. The movie doesn't argue with that premise, but I don't think the "grandpa is a pirate!!1" theory has anything going for it.
posted by Joe in Australia at 7:12 PM on December 23, 2014

Yes, but is grandpa saying that he's good at sleeping, or does he literally become a Viking Pirate?
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 7:15 PM on December 23, 2014 [4 favorites]

if you can find a source that makes this connection prior to the kid, please pass it along.

Me? I thought it right away. There's no way I'm the only one until this kid.

To me that line is designed to make you think exactly what this kid suggests, even if you dismiss it in the next moment because there's no way Peter Falk is really a pirate - OR IS HE? ... which brings the magic directly into the kid's everyday life. Now his imagination fills with wonder every time he sees Grandpa.
posted by scrowdid at 7:22 PM on December 23, 2014 [3 favorites]

It's a cool theory, but...yeah, no real basis there.

On the other hand, I totally agree with that link that the Wesley/Inigo fight is essentially showing off/ for fun compared to Inigo/Rugen being life and death and thus better. True dat. Thought that was obvious!
posted by jenfullmoon at 7:29 PM on December 23, 2014

From a highly entertaining recent Q & A with Cary Elwes, I learned that his awkward leg placement/slouch during the Buttercup and Westley Roll Down a Hill to the Swamp is entirely because of his broken toe. Which he broke while riding Andre the Giant's ATV. I haven't read the book (though he does sign your name and As You Wish, so be still, thirteen year old me) but if you have a chance to watch the film in a proper big theater, do it.
posted by jetlagaddict at 7:31 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

Another reason for PG rating: Wesley's (creepy IMO) line about perfect breasts.

I like so much about this movie, and yet, deep down can't help feeling that Wesley is a douche and Buttercup an idiot. Which makes it kind of ok because they kind of deserve each other. Mostly I just wait through the "romantic" scenes for the rest of the amazing cast to do their thing.
posted by emjaybee at 7:34 PM on December 23, 2014 [2 favorites]

mostly to death

Best inside joke in thread
posted by aydeejones at 7:37 PM on December 23, 2014

And yes this movie did make the couple seem possibly insufferable to each other in the long run, you especially think things would taper off once the stable boy fantasy was over.

Then you have Forrest and Jennay and Francis v. Claire
posted by aydeejones at 7:40 PM on December 23, 2014

Hilarious how many MeFite's are too cool to give him props for just making that clever connection at his age

Nobody's doing that. They're wondering why somebody has described the perfectly straight-forward ending as 'cryptic'. Now you've used the word as well.

It doesn't mean what you think it means.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 7:43 PM on December 23, 2014 [5 favorites]

Never mind that, I've just discovered that it's on Netflix. See you in two hours.
posted by arcticseal at 7:44 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

If I could make people watch one movie, it would be The Princess Bride. I'm sorta jealous of people who haven't seen it, because they don't know what's in store for them, but because it's called The Princess Bride it's so hard to get people to seriously understand that they need to go watch it immediately. Ah well.

It's not like this kid's theory solved some mystery I've been pondering, but I like it. Mostly because it shows a kind of wide-eyed, innocent enthusiasm and credulity that is so appropriate to the story.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 7:52 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

"...when he was saying 'As you wish', what he meant was, 'I love you.' "
posted by straight at 8:02 PM on December 23, 2014 [22 favorites]

Someone help me out, because I haven't seen the movie in ages, but what is the grandfather looking for in his pockets at the end? Maybe that's what made the kid think he was the pirate, because maybe he was looking for the mask?

Yeah I'm probably stretching plausibility.....
posted by aclevername at 8:04 PM on December 23, 2014

He was looking for his glasses, which were on his head.
posted by papercake at 8:07 PM on December 23, 2014 [2 favorites]

Doing genealogical research my dad discovered we are related to Cary Elwes. It's a strange familial connection I can't get into now, I'm on my phone, but it involves a suicide, an Indian tea plantation, a case of multiple sclerosis, relapsing fever, and bigamy with a Thai woman.
posted by Rumple at 8:09 PM on December 23, 2014 [8 favorites]

Solon and Thanks: "If I could make people watch one movie, it would be The Princess Bride. I'm sorta jealous of people who haven't seen it, because they don't know what's in store for them, but because it's called The Princess Bride it's so hard to get people to seriously understand that they need to go watch it immediately."

One of the guys in my pan and paper role playing group hasn't seen it and I've been badgering him for a couple years now to see it. I's inconceivable that he hasn't yet.
posted by Mitheral at 8:35 PM on December 23, 2014

If Peter Falk was the last Dread Pirate Roberts, exactly what kind of pirate was he?
I mean, he looked like an accountant. Still... "It's fun to charter an accountant And sail the wild accountancy..."
posted by Auden at 8:52 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

I want my father back, you son of a bitch.

That whole fight scene and the way Mandy Patinkin delivers that line gets me a bit choked up every single time, and I've seen the movie many, many times. It is such a powerful scene in an otherwise pretty lighthearted film.
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 9:03 PM on December 23, 2014 [3 favorites]

What about the ROUS?
Rodents Of Unusual Size? I don't think they exist...

... Aarrggh!

Gets me. Every. Time.
posted by arcticseal at 9:19 PM on December 23, 2014

... because Inigo is ready for any dirty trick, any vile calumny,

...except for, y'know, a boot-dagger to the gut.

I want my father back, you son of a bitch!

I've read somewhere that Patinkin has said he was thinking of his own father, who had been taken by cancer, to give that intense passion to Inigo.

I also read somewhere that Christopher Guest was so tickled at being in a friggin' swordfight scene that he kept making "ching, kaching" sword noises while filming; he had to be reminded not to do that and that the SFX would be added later.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:24 PM on December 23, 2014 [14 favorites]

Earlier this year my mother accidentally gaslighted me into thinking there was an attempted rape scene in Princess Bride.

I told her I was going to a showing (I hadn't seen the movie in years), and she mentions that there's such a scene. I don't believe her, but then a memory creeps up out of the past: A scene where Humperdinck is trying to forcibly consummate his marriage to Buttercup, but Wesley shows up just in time! She was right!

Turns out we were both remembering this awful scene in Robin Hood [TW: sexual assault, Kevin Costner] instead. Thanks a lot, mom!
posted by neckro23 at 9:57 PM on December 23, 2014 [2 favorites]

MetaFilter: I must be cranky.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 10:03 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

I like so much about this movie, and yet, deep down can't help feeling that Wesley is a douche and Buttercup an idiot.

That's definitely true in the book. The book's humour is very 1970s in some unpleasant ways.
posted by betweenthebars at 10:26 PM on December 23, 2014 [1 favorite]

And yes this movie did make the couple seem possibly insufferable to each other in the long run, you especially think things would taper off once the stable boy fantasy was over.


I remember a friend saying that, reading the book as a young girl and getting to the big kiss and end and then reading something like "Of course soon Buttercup would lose her looks and Wesely would grow restless, but at that moment it was the greatest kiss in history." and being bowled over that there would be a snuck in subversion of the happy ending within the very real happy ending itself.
posted by The Whelk at 10:53 PM on December 23, 2014 [2 favorites]

Huh. Today I learned this is considered a fan theory, and not the standard interpretation. I know it doesn't really make sense, but, y'know....fairy tale. I'm having my mind blown by considering it might not be what you're supposed to conclude. To be fair, I saw the Princess Bride after reading The Sandman, and there is a story read by a Grandpa from an Eastern European country about shape changing werewolf type creatures where gramps turns out to be the subject of the story. I'm pretty sure that was partially inspired by TPB.
posted by Jon Mitchell at 12:09 AM on December 24, 2014

to me the book was... I only found it decades after the film, and obvs was so excited there was a book!... but in the end it was only ever a great disappointment. it's entirely too-meta, insufferably-clever, and just not in the least entertaining.

it took so many false starts to even get past the few chapters, and even more tries to eventually finish. a literal headache to read. (and this from a voracious fan of such wonderfully-overthought meta-meta-nonsense as Munro and Eco spin. seriously, even the Silmarillion did not hurt my brain nearly as much...)
((and, double-wound: since the film is too-meta, insufferably-clever, and yet entertaining beyond entertainment))

I like the kid's take. after seeing the film probably hundreds of times without ever something like that occurring to me, my immediate thought was, huh, cool, that's a pretty decent idea actually, why didn't I ever think of that? it's not something that's too-obvious or strong/solid, but it's really not a bad idea either. (but I would love to see Peter Falk having have said "inconceivable!" ... somehow he does seem more like a probable descendant of Vizzini than a hereditary pirate)

book is bad. movie is good. clever kid is clever.
posted by dorian at 12:47 AM on December 24, 2014 [2 favorites]

The author has so much contempt for his kid and his (ex?) wife.

Hint: you may want to read up about Goldman's actual marriage history.
posted by MartinWisse at 2:00 AM on December 24, 2014 [5 favorites]

One of the guys in my pan and paper role playing group hasn't seen it and I've been badgering him for a couple years now to see it. I's inconceivable that he hasn't yet.

John Hodgman has pointed out that those of us who are enthusiastic about some creative work will almost certainly discourage someone we know from seeing or experiencing it by hounding them about it. This is particularly true if the person you're failing to convince is a spouse or S.O., and if they don't get what the fuss is all about and aren't that receptive. Some people are more receptive rhan others, but being too much of a fan doesn't allow someone else to develop their own opinion about it. If they don't like it, that could make things really uncomfortable or might result in hurt feelings.

The best way to go about turning someone on to a favorite creative work IMO is to mention it once or twice like it's a wonderful secret, and don't go into any detail or gushing or bring it up again. But remember that secret and guard it well, and allow their curiosity to get the best of them when they insist on bringing it up like it was their idea, or that they have to pry it out of you. Otherwise, being too enthusiastic about that kind of thing can cause a rift to the point they won't ever want to enjoy that thing- not with its biggest fan in the same room.
posted by krinklyfig at 2:03 AM on December 24, 2014 [4 favorites]

As an example... One ex still hasn't seen The Princess Bride, though not due to my lack of enthusiasm. Eventually I realized that she would have difficulty being honest with me if she didn't like it, especially if we watched it together. It would have made things much easier for both of us if I hadn't been such an evangelist about it, and we likely would have watched it together.
posted by krinklyfig at 2:16 AM on December 24, 2014

Wikipedia's article on William Goldman has a section called autobiographical fiction.
posted by Joe in Australia at 2:50 AM on December 24, 2014

I've never read the book upon which the screenplay is based, but it certainly sounds like this is one of those cases where the screenplay did a masterful job of distilling the best parts from the original work and leaving the rest out. I don't think it is wise to generalize (the book is always better). It isn't so much the form but what you do with it.
posted by spock at 4:25 AM on December 24, 2014

Love the Princes Bride, and, when I first heard this theory (hypothesis?), I was charmed. Then, I thought about the Dred Pirate Roberts's nature, and it actually made the theory...disturbing.

• The Dred Pirate Roberts is a pirate, so he finds ships boards them, and steals everything.
• The Dred Pirate Roberts LEAVES. NO. PRISONERS! That is, he kills everyone on every ship he attacks.
• So, the Dred Pirate Roberts is probably responsible for hundreds or thousands of deaths, with a healthy chunk of those at his own hand.
• ...so, in this kid's notion, what does that say about the grandfather? Oops.

posted by MrGuilt at 6:30 AM on December 24, 2014 [1 favorite]

it certainly sounds like this is one of those cases where the screenplay did a masterful job of distilling the best parts from the original work and leaving the rest out.

I'm surprised by all the hating on the book here. Some folks are misunderstanding that the author's described family life was also fiction (see MartinWisse's link) and some feel the book is too clever by half, yet still enjoy the film. I found them to be different approaches to the same fairytale, and enjoyed both immensely. Chacun a son goût.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:17 AM on December 24, 2014 [5 favorites]

I have long maintained that The Princess Bride is the rare case where if you loved the book, you need to see the movie, and if you loved the movie, you need to read the book.
posted by Shmuel510 at 7:30 AM on December 24, 2014 [2 favorites]

The day I finally twigged that the magnificent Rugen and the magnificent Tufnel are the same actor?

Good day.
posted by flabdablet at 9:11 AM on December 24, 2014 [1 favorite]

We gave my daughters the book to read when they were about 13 and they loved it. Then they watched the movie, and were disappointed that it wasn't as good as the book.

I consider this one of my greatest failures as a parent.
posted by straight at 9:22 AM on December 24, 2014 [1 favorite]

No one cared who he was until he passed on the mask.
posted by clarknova at 11:09 AM on December 24, 2014 [1 favorite]

"What happens if I pull that mask off?"
"It would be terribly uncomfortable."
"You're a dread pirate."
" . . . for you."
posted by knuckle tattoos at 1:40 PM on December 24, 2014 [1 favorite]

If I could make people watch one movie, it would be The Princess Bride.

I actually know--and fell in love with!--a real live human being who had not only seen the movie but despised it on every level.

I'm still somewhat amazed that I kept talking to him after discovering this.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:52 PM on December 24, 2014

It was probably about the fourth time I watched the movie before I noticed that the wounds Inigo inflicts on Rugen exactly match the ones Rugen had given to Inigo, including those Inigo received as a boy.

(If I were a clickbait writer, I would insist that this observation WILL BLOW YOUR MIND. But it's just a clever bit which escaped me the first few times I watched it.)
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 3:46 PM on December 24, 2014 [1 favorite]

Wait what? The cheek wounds were kind of narratively necessary and obvious, but that's a really neat little thing to slide in.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 3:56 PM on December 24, 2014

Now that I think about it, I think maybe the clickbait-y overhype is leading to some of the backlash here. When I saw this earlier on Facebook, I had much the same reaction as many here — "What? No, that doesn't make sense, that's a stupid theory."

But if it had just been presented as "an interesting fan theory about The Princess Bride," my reaction might have been more along the lines of "Huh, I hadn't considered that before... well, let's see... on reflection, probably not, but it's an interesting idea. What's that? A seven-year-old¹ came up with the idea? That's pretty clever of him, even if I don't ultimately agree with it."

But the presentation of it as THIS WILL BLOW YOUR MIND AND COMPLETELY CHANGE YOUR VIEW OF THE PRINCESS BRIDE FOREVER AND MAKE YOU A BETTER PERSON AND BRING ABOUT PEACE ON EARTH AND GOOD WILL TOWARDS MEN made me predisposed to hate it before I got to the theory.

¹Somehow I got it in my head that the boy was seven years old. Looking back through the various links I can't find support for that and don't know where I got it from. I don't know how old he is.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:04 PM on December 24, 2014 [7 favorites]

Stupid or not, if I ever have kids they are SO growing up thinking I'm a retired Dread Pirate Roberts.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 4:13 PM on December 24, 2014 [1 favorite]

Stupid or not, if I ever have kids they are SO growing up thinking I'm a retired Dread Pirate Roberts.

Step 1: Move to Patagonia.
posted by Etrigan at 5:03 PM on December 24, 2014 [3 favorites]

if I ever have kids they are SO growing up thinking I'm a retired Dread Pirate Roberts.
Step 1: Move to Patagonia.

Step 2: Most likely kill them in the morning.
posted by Greg_Ace at 7:23 PM on December 24, 2014 [5 favorites]

I love this movie, and don't want to leave the impression that this kid thinking about it enough to come up with that mistaken impression is "As you wish" has anything to do with Dread Pirate Roberts beyond it being a "Westley-ism" is a bad thing, BUT Westley says "As you wish" to Buttercup a long time before he ever becomes DPR, and there's no way Westley utters "As you wish" to anyone BUT Buttercup, especially in DPR persona. So, mind not blown - still love the movie, though.

As for the book, I was so delighted when I wrote to the address inside asking for the "missing scene" and got the form letter back. I kept the letter with the book, but it went missing during one of its visits to a friend who hadn't read it yet (grrrr). I should probably write again, since Wikipedia advises that they still do this...
posted by birdsquared at 9:16 PM on December 24, 2014 [3 favorites]

You all can be doubters all you wish. I'm going to believe that kid's theory and wait for the premiere of "Big Trouble in Little Florin".
posted by happyroach at 4:56 AM on December 25, 2014 [1 favorite]