Diary Of A B Grade Hooker
January 27, 2015 5:19 PM   Subscribe

Kinja user "Curious Squid" is an Australian woman who moonlights as a prostitute. She keeps a diary of her life as a sex worker, writing about the banal (arranging jobs) to the very interesting (sexual violence against sex workers).
posted by reenum (18 comments total) 26 users marked this as a favorite


 
Historically, these 'true life sex worker' stories run about 50/50 completely made up, right?
posted by leotrotsky at 5:46 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


If that.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 6:00 PM on January 27, 2015


Wait -- something interesting is coming from Kinja?
posted by potsmokinghippieoverlord at 6:12 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


That layout/navigation is a pain on my browser, but I like the essays that I read.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:16 PM on January 27, 2015


Animal text messages: A+
posted by Potomac Avenue at 7:17 PM on January 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


not to inadvertently bash rename, but this reads as 100% real to me just because it's so boring.
posted by infinitewindow at 7:46 PM on January 27, 2015 [6 favorites]


Historically, these 'true life sex worker' stories run about 50/50 completely made up, right?

I've known quite a few sex workers, and unless they like to lie and lie and lie and lie on a daily basis, no.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:16 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


Reads pretty darn true to me. With prostitution (substantially) legal in Australia, many folk are writing up their experiences. This person made a good book and a writing career from it.
posted by Kerasia at 9:21 PM on January 27, 2015


And, actually, the more I read this? The more it sounds absolutely true. I don't currently have any friends who work, but I have in the past, and the vast majority of stories are amazingly banal: "Dude couldn't get it up, dude wouldn't respect the boundaries I laid down when we spoke," etc. "Dude wanted to fuck me in his son's bed wearing his son's clothes" (true story) and "dude wanted me to watch him take a shit while I jerked off" (likewise) are the rarities. Most sex workers, at least in my second-hand experience, are providing a desired service to people who want a thing that is really pretty normal.

Think of the bad dates you've been on that have involved bad or weird (to you) sex. That's basically a sex worker's entire professional life, minus having to pretend at the small talk most of the time. Rarely is it people who have specific fetishes--mostly it's people who just want to get laid right now, and like the vast majority of us, 'right now' isn't an option when going to a bar to pick up.

To me, at least, this reads (so far; I'm only up to entry 22) as the sex worker equivalent of talking about Dave in Accounting wanting a spreadsheet formatted a certain way. It's just a job.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:47 PM on January 27, 2015 [7 favorites]


On Twitter, I follow a couple of people who do sex work here and their stories also sound much more like this than like Belle de Jour's. (Also, they are not fond of being called "prostitutes", much preferring "sex worker", but I don't want or intend to start In-group/Out-group Vocabulary Grar based on my very limited understanding.)
posted by gingerest at 9:59 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yup. Hookers always lie.

Alternatively, you could treat them like human beings, but let's not get crazy.
posted by lumpenprole at 10:09 PM on January 27, 2015 [3 favorites]


I've also known quite a few sex workers, and as far as vocab goes it runs the gamut -- I've known some who embraced just about every term, but "sex worker" is probably the most neutral and widely accepted (those who were OK with / used "prostitute", "escort", etc I don't think would have been offended by "sex worker", but the reverse is not necessarily true).


Yup. Hookers always lie.

I read those comments as saying "these blogs are often people pretending to be sex workers who are not", not "sex workers usually make stuff up".
posted by thefoxgod at 10:31 PM on January 27, 2015 [14 favorites]


Also "sex worker" is a much more inclusive term, it doesn't necessarily mean escort/prostitute/etc, it includes porn actors, nude/seminude dancers, even webcam/phone sex.
posted by thefoxgod at 10:33 PM on January 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I am really enjoying her writing. She's got some interesting things to say about sex work and racism, too.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 11:15 PM on January 27, 2015 [2 favorites]




She's completely right. Jill Meagher's abduction, rape and murder was everywhere. As I was reading Tracy's story I was thinking, I don't remember hearing about that. Now I know why.

She's a very thoughtful and articulate writer. Thanks for the link and also to those who've highlighted specific bits.
posted by Athanassiel at 5:38 AM on January 28, 2015


Yup. Hookers always lie.
I read those comments as saying "these blogs are often people pretending to be sex workers who are not", not "sex workers usually make stuff up".


Which is of course what I meant. I've noticed an increasing tendency here for some folks to immediately jump to the least charitable possible interpretation of others comments here on the blue, and it's really starting to grate. And I've been here a long time.

Maybe don't assume everyone else in the world is the worst possible asshole?
posted by leotrotsky at 7:22 AM on January 28, 2015 [8 favorites]


I started being curious about the sex trade back in the craigslist days; there was so much companionship for sale it seemed like half of the people you knew must be moonlighting. In the time since I found a number of interesting people writing things online about the life; let me check my feed reader...

Amanda Brooks doesn't seem to have updated in a long time but she wrote some books of advice for people working and had some interesting posts.

Tits and Sass is ongoing and written by sex workers.

Jenny DeMilo now writes about being a domme but used to write "Confessions of a Message Board Hooker." It's the same blog but you'll need to go back to much older pre-2011 posts to find her writing when she was full-service working. She also contributes to Fairy Whore Mother which is meant to be sort of a mentoring kind of thing, it seems.

As said by some above, it's interesting how banal so much of it is.
posted by phearlez at 1:21 PM on January 29, 2015


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