Dogs. Big Dogs.
February 18, 2015 11:00 AM Subscribe
If you just cut it short at "will pursue relocation", that would be an apt description of the Siberian. That is what they do.
posted by Wolfdog at 11:07 AM on February 18, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by Wolfdog at 11:07 AM on February 18, 2015 [4 favorites]
"OK, so I'm in this fenced yard. That's a problem. I'm going to pursue relocation."
posted by Wolfdog at 11:08 AM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
posted by Wolfdog at 11:08 AM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
The Bullmastiff description is clearly written by someone who has never met a Bullmastiff. They are the gentlest dogs I've ever met.
posted by DrLickies at 11:09 AM on February 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by DrLickies at 11:09 AM on February 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
Besides the bullmastiff gaffe, there are one or two other small inaccuracies in the descriptions.
posted by Wolfdog at 11:12 AM on February 18, 2015 [11 favorites]
posted by Wolfdog at 11:12 AM on February 18, 2015 [11 favorites]
What did the working dogs ever do to this jerk?
posted by blucevalo at 11:19 AM on February 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by blucevalo at 11:19 AM on February 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
SAMOYEDFirst bit's right. The bit about a mining scheme gives them far too much credit. Sams' brains are primarily composed of white fluff, as is 30% of your house when the blow coat.
Hailing from Siberia. Has antifreeze for blood and will eventually settle in South Florida once it attains oligarch status through a copper mining scheme.
posted by maryr at 11:25 AM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
"BOXER
X-Rays reveal its interior contains no organs, only springs, chewed up shoes, and huge clouds of pure fart gas."
Spot on. Needs to mention couch cushion consumption though.
posted by jeribus at 11:26 AM on February 18, 2015 [6 favorites]
X-Rays reveal its interior contains no organs, only springs, chewed up shoes, and huge clouds of pure fart gas."
Spot on. Needs to mention couch cushion consumption though.
posted by jeribus at 11:26 AM on February 18, 2015 [6 favorites]
Big dogs forever!
Someday I'll own a ranch and fill it with giant rescue dogs. Especially the fluffy ones.
posted by Squeak Attack at 11:42 AM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
Someday I'll own a ranch and fill it with giant rescue dogs. Especially the fluffy ones.
posted by Squeak Attack at 11:42 AM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
All you really need to know about the Black Russian Terrier is that it was bred by the NKVD to eat dissidents.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:56 AM on February 18, 2015
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:56 AM on February 18, 2015
I had a good friend in college that had two rescue bull mastiffs. They were the most awesome and lovely dogs I've ever met. One was dumber than a bag of wet sledgehammers and the other was crazy Einstein smart. Smart dog would constantly manipulate dumb dog to do stuff and get caught, all the while she reaped the benefits of his dumb antics.
However, it was a very dangerous house to pass out drunk in. The dogs liked to cuddle and did not understand that they were not lap dogs. More than once I woke up convinced I was paralyzed from the waist down because they'd crawled in my lap while I was asleep.
posted by teleri025 at 11:59 AM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
However, it was a very dangerous house to pass out drunk in. The dogs liked to cuddle and did not understand that they were not lap dogs. More than once I woke up convinced I was paralyzed from the waist down because they'd crawled in my lap while I was asleep.
posted by teleri025 at 11:59 AM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
Sometimes I really wish I could have a dog.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:00 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:00 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
Is there something wrong with my browser, because I wanted a lot more pictures.
posted by benito.strauss at 12:07 PM on February 18, 2015 [19 favorites]
posted by benito.strauss at 12:07 PM on February 18, 2015 [19 favorites]
The problem with describing a Husky is that the bi-eyed versions have split personalities...
posted by HuronBob at 12:29 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by HuronBob at 12:29 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
He forgot to add that the malamutes will kill the horses on their own, then roll inthe rotting carcass when spring comes.
posted by ITravelMontana at 12:47 PM on February 18, 2015
posted by ITravelMontana at 12:47 PM on February 18, 2015
They're dogs. They'll ALL roll in the rotting carcass come spring.
posted by maryr at 1:20 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by maryr at 1:20 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
"OK, so I'm in this fenced yard. That's a problem. I'm going to pursue relocation."
Yesterday, coming back from a store securing needed snow day provisions (ingredients for hot toddies) I saw two huskies come barreling down the middle of the street, clearly driven positively mad with glee by the snow. I was a little worried that someone would let their dogs run off leash in a city, even if traffic was light, but the dogs were clearly really happy, so I could only be so miffed by it. I expected to see the owner a little ways down the street, but I never did. There was nobody behind those dogs. I think they might have just escaped to go play in the snow.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 1:50 PM on February 18, 2015
Yesterday, coming back from a store securing needed snow day provisions (ingredients for hot toddies) I saw two huskies come barreling down the middle of the street, clearly driven positively mad with glee by the snow. I was a little worried that someone would let their dogs run off leash in a city, even if traffic was light, but the dogs were clearly really happy, so I could only be so miffed by it. I expected to see the owner a little ways down the street, but I never did. There was nobody behind those dogs. I think they might have just escaped to go play in the snow.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 1:50 PM on February 18, 2015
Many years ago, when I had a much higher domestic filth tolerance, I fostered for mastiff rescues. Aside from the mess and the space-sharing issues (and a lot of little broken bones in your feet, because they like to stand right next to you and not move if you don't move. Or can't move.), they are far better housedogs than my subsequent dogs.
We had almost every variant of breed*, every range of temperment (including an "untouchable" Neopolitan who met my roommate and fell in love and was a fine dog for the rest of his life. We had a lump on his head removed when he was neutered - it was a bullet.), and every background from well cared-for but "got too big" to neglect cases. We had a very few personality clashes, and maybe lucked out a lot with sometimes 4-5 unrelated dogs at a time, but for the most part they were chill, loyal, cat-friendly drool factories.
They're the *best* dogs. I have put quite a lot of time and money into this study.
*I think the only flavor we never saw was Argentine Dogo, which at the time was a fairly rare dog in the US, and we never expected to see one. One of my current dogs, a street stray we thought was pit-adjacent, turns out per DNA test to be...Malamute-Dogo.)
posted by Lyn Never at 2:34 PM on February 18, 2015 [4 favorites]
We had almost every variant of breed*, every range of temperment (including an "untouchable" Neopolitan who met my roommate and fell in love and was a fine dog for the rest of his life. We had a lump on his head removed when he was neutered - it was a bullet.), and every background from well cared-for but "got too big" to neglect cases. We had a very few personality clashes, and maybe lucked out a lot with sometimes 4-5 unrelated dogs at a time, but for the most part they were chill, loyal, cat-friendly drool factories.
They're the *best* dogs. I have put quite a lot of time and money into this study.
*I think the only flavor we never saw was Argentine Dogo, which at the time was a fairly rare dog in the US, and we never expected to see one. One of my current dogs, a street stray we thought was pit-adjacent, turns out per DNA test to be...Malamute-Dogo.)
posted by Lyn Never at 2:34 PM on February 18, 2015 [4 favorites]
"I saw two huskies come barreling down the middle of the street, clearly driven positively mad with glee by the snow."
30 miles later they stopped, looked at each other, and said "Where the hell are we?" and had no clue as to how to get home....
Never let your Husky loose, they will run forever and get lost....
posted by HuronBob at 4:41 PM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
30 miles later they stopped, looked at each other, and said "Where the hell are we?" and had no clue as to how to get home....
Never let your Husky loose, they will run forever and get lost....
posted by HuronBob at 4:41 PM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
but for the most part they were chill, loyal, cat-friendly drool factories
We had a huge brindle English mastiff when I was in elementary school and my mother ran an in-home daycare. Somewhere I have photos of four elementary-school kids lying side-by-side using the 200-pound dog as a pillow while watching tv, and of two of our three cats similarly curled up next to the sleeping dog.
He would definitely growl to keep strangers at bay, but he was extremely tolerant of anyone ok'ed by my parents as part of the household.
posted by jaguar at 4:59 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
We had a huge brindle English mastiff when I was in elementary school and my mother ran an in-home daycare. Somewhere I have photos of four elementary-school kids lying side-by-side using the 200-pound dog as a pillow while watching tv, and of two of our three cats similarly curled up next to the sleeping dog.
He would definitely growl to keep strangers at bay, but he was extremely tolerant of anyone ok'ed by my parents as part of the household.
posted by jaguar at 4:59 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
I love big dogs. For awhile, when I lived with my aunt and uncle, I shared my twin bed with a laborador named Me Too; it was his bed, really, but he shared it with me. They raised labs and lab/Great Dane mixed dogs trained for hunting. Later on I had a Great Dane and a mini poodle - the poodle ran the roost, the Dane was a big sweetie who followed her orders. Then I fostered a Great Dane/Mastiff mix - Boomer - one summer; everyone was scared to death of him, but he was a giant love dog; my poodle ran that one around, too. Then my soul-mate came along, Crackers, a flat-coated retriever - absolutely beautiful and the love of my life. He was deliberately run over two years later, but he's still in my heart. Spent a week with a friend in Denver who raised prize Dobermans and my sleeping bag and I shared her living room floor with five of them - incredible, brilliant beasts. Then I had a German Shepherd and a Great Pyrenees, both nice dogs.
Where I live now they allow these little bitty things they call dogs and they're cute and sweet to pet and fuss over, but they're not the same critter I think of when I think of dogs.
I love to watch the dog shows - and especially the working dogs class - the best of the best. I got a kick out of the goofy comments in this post - it was fun. I got a good laugh out of this:
30 miles later they stopped, looked at each other, and said "Where the hell are we?" and had no clue as to how to get home....
because I could see Crackers doing that - oh, yeah.
posted by aryma at 7:48 PM on February 18, 2015 [4 favorites]
Where I live now they allow these little bitty things they call dogs and they're cute and sweet to pet and fuss over, but they're not the same critter I think of when I think of dogs.
I love to watch the dog shows - and especially the working dogs class - the best of the best. I got a kick out of the goofy comments in this post - it was fun. I got a good laugh out of this:
30 miles later they stopped, looked at each other, and said "Where the hell are we?" and had no clue as to how to get home....
because I could see Crackers doing that - oh, yeah.
posted by aryma at 7:48 PM on February 18, 2015 [4 favorites]
I like big dogs and I cannot lie.
"OK, so I'm in this fenced yard. That's a problem. I'm going to pursue relocation."
"BOXER: X-Rays reveal its interior contains no organs, only springs, chewed up shoes, and huge clouds of pure fart gas."
So, one of my chowderheads, Rocky, is Boxer/GSD/Husky. He's a handsome beast - beautiful posture, sweet face, gorgeous markings - and hasn't got the sense the gods gave a dandelion. He's spoilt rotten! He has his own rocking chair, sleeps in whatever bed he pleases (usually he pleases to sleep with Younger Monster, to whom he has been glued since the day we adopted him), gets treats merely for existing, and isn't expected to do anything except run laps around the yard, destroy his toys with glee, and clear the block with his weapons-grade farts, if that's what he wants to do. Lap of luxury, who needs to go exploring?
Rocky does, that's who. When we moved into the current house, he was so very excited to have so much room to run around. We were delighted to watch him race around at top speed, ears flapping, tongue hanging out, bouncing with the joy of running. Then he realized he could climb the fence, and it was off to the races. Literally. The dopey couch potato Boxer part of him might as well not exist when the Husky desire to RUN FOR YEARS kicks in. I chased that dumb fucker for a mile and a half, he crossed a busy street back and forth and scared the hell out of me, and someone took pity on my arthritic ass and called the cops. The lady cop who showed up stopped traffic, and about a dozen motorists got out of their cars to help me corral him.
Rocky, the jerk, ran right to the cop and hid behind her. I cried with relief, yelled at him that he was a dumbass, and threatened to glaze him in mustard and eat him. The lady cop laughed and offered us a ride home. Rocky thought sticking his head out the cop car window was the best thing ever.
We put up higher fencing. Damned sled dog instinct.
posted by MissySedai at 8:45 PM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
"OK, so I'm in this fenced yard. That's a problem. I'm going to pursue relocation."
"BOXER: X-Rays reveal its interior contains no organs, only springs, chewed up shoes, and huge clouds of pure fart gas."
So, one of my chowderheads, Rocky, is Boxer/GSD/Husky. He's a handsome beast - beautiful posture, sweet face, gorgeous markings - and hasn't got the sense the gods gave a dandelion. He's spoilt rotten! He has his own rocking chair, sleeps in whatever bed he pleases (usually he pleases to sleep with Younger Monster, to whom he has been glued since the day we adopted him), gets treats merely for existing, and isn't expected to do anything except run laps around the yard, destroy his toys with glee, and clear the block with his weapons-grade farts, if that's what he wants to do. Lap of luxury, who needs to go exploring?
Rocky does, that's who. When we moved into the current house, he was so very excited to have so much room to run around. We were delighted to watch him race around at top speed, ears flapping, tongue hanging out, bouncing with the joy of running. Then he realized he could climb the fence, and it was off to the races. Literally. The dopey couch potato Boxer part of him might as well not exist when the Husky desire to RUN FOR YEARS kicks in. I chased that dumb fucker for a mile and a half, he crossed a busy street back and forth and scared the hell out of me, and someone took pity on my arthritic ass and called the cops. The lady cop who showed up stopped traffic, and about a dozen motorists got out of their cars to help me corral him.
Rocky, the jerk, ran right to the cop and hid behind her. I cried with relief, yelled at him that he was a dumbass, and threatened to glaze him in mustard and eat him. The lady cop laughed and offered us a ride home. Rocky thought sticking his head out the cop car window was the best thing ever.
We put up higher fencing. Damned sled dog instinct.
posted by MissySedai at 8:45 PM on February 18, 2015 [8 favorites]
GREAT PYRENEES
A very amiable line of brown bears dyed white by corrupt Spanish breeders for centuries.
this is 100% true and factual information
posted by jetlagaddict at 9:01 PM on February 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
A very amiable line of brown bears dyed white by corrupt Spanish breeders for centuries.
this is 100% true and factual information
posted by jetlagaddict at 9:01 PM on February 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
Oh man I am seriously tempted to find pictures for all these breeds.
posted by Pronoiac at 11:53 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Pronoiac at 11:53 PM on February 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
A while back in the Financial Literacy class I taught my high schoolers, we had a "Livin' Large" Week where the kids got an unlimited budget and had to buy the most expensive things they could find.
The winner in the Crazy-Expensive-Pets Category was the Tibetan Mastiff.
At the end of the term when all the kids did an assessment, everyone forgot how to read a paycheck and how to do taxes, but they all remembered that goddamned dog breed.
posted by kinetic at 5:37 AM on February 19, 2015
The winner in the Crazy-Expensive-Pets Category was the Tibetan Mastiff.
At the end of the term when all the kids did an assessment, everyone forgot how to read a paycheck and how to do taxes, but they all remembered that goddamned dog breed.
posted by kinetic at 5:37 AM on February 19, 2015
Was going to do an FPP out of this, but might as well put it here... Vogue covers Backstage Beauty at Westminster. Video.
posted by Mchelly at 6:56 AM on February 19, 2015
posted by Mchelly at 6:56 AM on February 19, 2015
DOGUE DU BORDEAUX
Laziest Franglais ever.
posted by biffa at 7:08 AM on February 19, 2015 [1 favorite]
Laziest Franglais ever.
posted by biffa at 7:08 AM on February 19, 2015 [1 favorite]
The caption on this pic from the Vogue series is TOTALLY WORTH IT.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:17 AM on February 19, 2015
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:17 AM on February 19, 2015
30 miles later they stopped, looked at each other, and said "Where the hell are we?" and had no clue as to how to get home....
Never let your Husky loose, they will run forever and get lost....
posted by HuronBob
The statement I make to people is: 'If I let him off lead, we'll find him in 3 miles or 3 hours.'
posted by Nanukthedog at 10:53 AM on February 19, 2015 [2 favorites]
Never let your Husky loose, they will run forever and get lost....
posted by HuronBob
The statement I make to people is: 'If I let him off lead, we'll find him in 3 miles or 3 hours.'
posted by Nanukthedog at 10:53 AM on February 19, 2015 [2 favorites]
Same for samoyeds, BTW. And it turns out the best way to capture one is to have a dog they want to play with in your yard. Our sams escaped twice to reaches beyond where we could track them and both times were found by nice people over a mile away who went to let their dogs in from the yard and found two extra fluffballs with them.
posted by maryr at 11:02 AM on February 19, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by maryr at 11:02 AM on February 19, 2015 [4 favorites]
« Older Russian Spring | miscarriage invisibility Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by maryr at 11:05 AM on February 18, 2015 [3 favorites]