Performance Lederhosen
April 3, 2015 9:49 AM   Subscribe

Patented bi-button codpiece? Snug, ball-tight fit? Check and check. After the five-year break-in period, your performance lederhosen will be good to go.

Yes I know April Fools was two days ago. Sue me.
posted by gottabefunky (29 comments total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
 
Eponysterical?

I had Leserhosen as a kid, and they were a lock for every report, several years of elementary school. Dependable fodder for presentations, but a bit undignified.
posted by wenestvedt at 9:58 AM on April 3, 2015 [3 favorites]


What are "liederhosen"?
posted by Nelson at 9:59 AM on April 3, 2015


Hosen made from smooth, differentiable manifolds, I expect.
posted by Zalzidrax at 10:03 AM on April 3, 2015 [3 favorites]


You wear them for art song recitals, Nelson. Important since most performance venues are very air-conditioned.
posted by amtho at 10:03 AM on April 3, 2015 [3 favorites]


Pants made out of leather instead of high-performance fabric! What a hilarious April Fool's Day prank! What are they going to come up with next year? Something absurd like leather hiking boots or leather wallets would be great.
posted by tecg at 10:04 AM on April 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


Do you maybe mean, "Das Lied der Hosen", the lesser-known childrens song by Hoffmann von Fallersleben?
posted by frimble at 10:04 AM on April 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Do these come in a tactical version?
posted by Foci for Analysis at 10:07 AM on April 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


What are "liederhosen"?

Pants for singing in.
posted by kenko at 10:09 AM on April 3, 2015 [4 favorites]


And the water proof Rubberhosen.
posted by boilermonster at 10:14 AM on April 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


You know who else liked Lederhosen?

Also, "recreating" ... is that a thing that people say now?
posted by sobarel at 10:14 AM on April 3, 2015


...and that's why they called him
The Leder of the Pack.
posted by oneswellfoop at 10:22 AM on April 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Realish.
posted by Muddler at 10:27 AM on April 3, 2015


It's pronounced "layder hosen".
posted by monospace at 10:37 AM on April 3, 2015


Do these come in a tactical version?

No, but as they're made of leather, they do come in a tactile version.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:41 AM on April 3, 2015


It's like putting your butt in a cow!
posted by aubilenon at 11:00 AM on April 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


The rock-climbing guy did look pretty great in his suspenders and leather trousers, I admit.
posted by kenko at 11:38 AM on April 3, 2015 [3 favorites]



Do these come in a tactical version?

What, for 'going commando'?
 
posted by Herodios at 12:09 PM on April 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


They're fucking awesome and I'm jealous of all the freaks who wear them unabashedly. Because I always think they're freaks - they're probably not freaks, probably just people who like sturdy, long wearing pants but here's something super - uh - alpine about them.
I couldn't pull that off and then you just feel super self-conscious and your lederhosen pleasure is totally spoiled.
posted by From Bklyn at 12:19 PM on April 3, 2015


And they go so well with the Long Sock!
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:28 PM on April 3, 2015


I immediately emailed this to my husband (who is Bavarian and a cyclist) with the subject line "Your new bike shorts! :)"

Oh, the Germanity!
posted by Flipping_Hades_Terwilliger at 12:31 PM on April 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


They're cut for mobility.
posted by St. Hubbins at 1:11 PM on April 3, 2015


Holy crap, that first picture of Hitler is a quintessentially senior-class-picture pose.
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:44 PM on April 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Lederhosen shaming is not cool guys.
posted by TheCoug at 5:59 PM on April 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Do these come in a tactical version?

What the shit, Metafilter? tacticalhosen.
posted by Jack Karaoke at 6:27 PM on April 3, 2015


Aside from the suspenders, I always thought that lederhosen were accessorized with a stein, no?
posted by BlueHorse at 8:56 PM on April 3, 2015


Well, that was somewhat arousing.
posted by fritley at 5:52 PM on April 4, 2015


I just emailed this to my marvellous gay German flatmate. I think muscular outdoorsy gents in Lederhosen will make an ideal Easter gift.
posted by Pallas Athena at 11:08 AM on April 5, 2015


I ordered a pair, but they arrived lightly soiled. I suspect that Pat Sajak and a lobster were involved.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 7:30 AM on April 6, 2015


Sadly the video is now "private", even if you're signed in to YouTube...
posted by Pallas Athena at 1:52 PM on April 14, 2015


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