Apatosaur no more!
April 7, 2015 7:13 AM Subscribe
Our long taxonomical nightmare is finally over!
posted by phunniemee at 7:20 AM on April 7, 2015 [19 favorites]
posted by phunniemee at 7:20 AM on April 7, 2015 [19 favorites]
let's be honest, "brontosaurus" always, always sounded better than "apatosaurus"
posted by mightygodking at 7:20 AM on April 7, 2015 [25 favorites]
posted by mightygodking at 7:20 AM on April 7, 2015 [25 favorites]
Apatosaurus Burgers just don't have the same ring.
posted by bondcliff at 7:23 AM on April 7, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by bondcliff at 7:23 AM on April 7, 2015 [5 favorites]
I will be casually dropping the word "brontosaurus" into conversations about dinosaurs all day in a bud to catch pedants who are not up to date.
Have they given it feathers yet?
posted by Artw at 7:23 AM on April 7, 2015 [18 favorites]
Have they given it feathers yet?
posted by Artw at 7:23 AM on April 7, 2015 [18 favorites]
I feel like part of my childhood has been redeemed.
posted by Foosnark at 7:24 AM on April 7, 2015 [12 favorites]
posted by Foosnark at 7:24 AM on April 7, 2015 [12 favorites]
They come from Planet Pluto.
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:26 AM on April 7, 2015 [19 favorites]
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:26 AM on April 7, 2015 [19 favorites]
I mean, apatasaurus is still a thing, it's just that brontosaurus is also a thing now, too.
The real story of what happened here isn't quite as clean as this article about "science" would have you believe. They sent some...er...lobbyists from Big Sauropod out for a sit down. You don't disrespect the thunder lizard. That's a mistake you only make once.
posted by phunniemee at 7:30 AM on April 7, 2015 [7 favorites]
The real story of what happened here isn't quite as clean as this article about "science" would have you believe. They sent some...er...lobbyists from Big Sauropod out for a sit down. You don't disrespect the thunder lizard. That's a mistake you only make once.
posted by phunniemee at 7:30 AM on April 7, 2015 [7 favorites]
It feels like Triceratops not being a thing anymore barely got out the gate...
posted by Artw at 7:33 AM on April 7, 2015
posted by Artw at 7:33 AM on April 7, 2015
Have they given it feathers yet?
All of the fossilized skin impressions of sauropods that have been discovered have been scaly.
posted by 1970s Antihero at 7:33 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
All of the fossilized skin impressions of sauropods that have been discovered have been scaly.
posted by 1970s Antihero at 7:33 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
I'm kind of glad my kid was never really into dinosaurs, because we can't keep up. The feathers still throw me, because most renderings still look kind of fake, like they glued feathers to them.
posted by emjaybee at 7:35 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by emjaybee at 7:35 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
Well, duh. Everybody knows that aptosaurs have deep red eyes, and brontosaurs have bright yellow eyes.
posted by phooky at 7:36 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by phooky at 7:36 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
Does this mean he gets to be in Jurassic World?
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:44 AM on April 7, 2015
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:44 AM on April 7, 2015
I hope Jurassic World has in world pedants pointing out Indomus Rex isn't a real dinosaur.
posted by Artw at 7:58 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Artw at 7:58 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
They come from Planet Pluto.
If they add Pluto back to the solar system, this could be the best day ever.
posted by drezdn at 7:59 AM on April 7, 2015 [5 favorites]
If they add Pluto back to the solar system, this could be the best day ever.
posted by drezdn at 7:59 AM on April 7, 2015 [5 favorites]
this is the best news all year im telling the who library
in fact im going downstairs to the children's room to be like WHO KNOWS MORE ABOUT DINOSAURS NOW KIDS
i know it seems like an extreme response but i should never have let those kids see me cry
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:03 AM on April 7, 2015 [20 favorites]
in fact im going downstairs to the children's room to be like WHO KNOWS MORE ABOUT DINOSAURS NOW KIDS
i know it seems like an extreme response but i should never have let those kids see me cry
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:03 AM on April 7, 2015 [20 favorites]
Jesus Christ, this shit is FUCKING ME UP. How am I going to show up my cousin now? She thinks she's so much better because she's six days older (LESS THAN A WEEK) and my knowledge that her favorite dinosaur didn't really exist was the only thing keeping me on top. I am seriously not handling this well.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 8:08 AM on April 7, 2015 [18 favorites]
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 8:08 AM on April 7, 2015 [18 favorites]
If they add Pluto back to the solar system, this could be the best day ever.
Pluto is part of the solar system, it's just in the company of Ceres, Haumea, Eris and Makemake.
posted by Elementary Penguin at 8:10 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
Pluto is part of the solar system, it's just in the company of Ceres, Haumea, Eris and Makemake.
posted by Elementary Penguin at 8:10 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
and my knowledge that her favorite dinosaur didn't really exist was the only thing keeping me on top
Who is your favorite dinosaur, then?
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:10 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
Who is your favorite dinosaur, then?
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:10 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
Pluto is part of the solar system, it's just in the company of Ceres, Haumea, Eris and Makemake.
A cesspool of scum and villainy if ever there was one . . . no wonder all the normal planets rejected it for hanging out with that crowd.
posted by flug at 8:20 AM on April 7, 2015 [3 favorites]
A cesspool of scum and villainy if ever there was one . . . no wonder all the normal planets rejected it for hanging out with that crowd.
posted by flug at 8:20 AM on April 7, 2015 [3 favorites]
DINOSAUR MUSINGS:
1. A lot of scenes in Jurassic Park drive my dad CRAZY with illogic, but one of them that he hates the most is when one of the brontosauruses is eating the top of a tree. The dino’s head is already taller than the tree, and he is eating the top of it. And then he rears up to stand on his hind legs (whoaaaa cool 90's CGI, I guess), and has to LOWER HIS HEAD TO KEEP EATING THE SAME LEAVES. Did he just have a cramp and wanted to stretch? Or did they think it would be cool to see a brontosaurus stand on his hind legs and just forget to make the tree tall enough that it would make any sense at all?
2. There is a gang of turkey vultures that lives at the end of my street, and the other day they were too busy tearing apart a roadkill corpse to move for my car, so I drove around them. I thought to myself, “a ravenous cluster of super-evolved dinosaurs are shredding a bleeding corpse 20 feet from my driveway, and I responded by driving around them and fiddling with my radio. I live in Jurassic Park and I am bored by it.”
posted by a fiendish thingy at 8:22 AM on April 7, 2015 [22 favorites]
1. A lot of scenes in Jurassic Park drive my dad CRAZY with illogic, but one of them that he hates the most is when one of the brontosauruses is eating the top of a tree. The dino’s head is already taller than the tree, and he is eating the top of it. And then he rears up to stand on his hind legs (whoaaaa cool 90's CGI, I guess), and has to LOWER HIS HEAD TO KEEP EATING THE SAME LEAVES. Did he just have a cramp and wanted to stretch? Or did they think it would be cool to see a brontosaurus stand on his hind legs and just forget to make the tree tall enough that it would make any sense at all?
2. There is a gang of turkey vultures that lives at the end of my street, and the other day they were too busy tearing apart a roadkill corpse to move for my car, so I drove around them. I thought to myself, “a ravenous cluster of super-evolved dinosaurs are shredding a bleeding corpse 20 feet from my driveway, and I responded by driving around them and fiddling with my radio. I live in Jurassic Park and I am bored by it.”
posted by a fiendish thingy at 8:22 AM on April 7, 2015 [22 favorites]
Stegosauruses because they have such lovely plates! They use them for regulating temperature and if I had a pet stegosaurus I would name it Woodrow Wilson if he were a boy and Martha Washington if she were a girl and give her nice massages and scratch her between her plates and take her for walks.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 8:22 AM on April 7, 2015 [22 favorites]
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 8:22 AM on April 7, 2015 [22 favorites]
Or did they think it would be cool to see a brontosaurus stand on his hind legs and just forget to make the tree tall enough that it would make any sense at all?
I thought they did that for the effect when the dinosaur's front legs come down and it shakes the water glass, because then we see the water glass again with T-Rex and shit is all messed up.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 8:24 AM on April 7, 2015
I thought they did that for the effect when the dinosaur's front legs come down and it shakes the water glass, because then we see the water glass again with T-Rex and shit is all messed up.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 8:24 AM on April 7, 2015
taxonomy (the naming of organisms)
I'm now imagining a bunch of scientific Adams who leave the busywork of actual research to other scientists while they just sit around and invent new cool-sounding names for everything.
posted by Pyrogenesis at 8:26 AM on April 7, 2015
I'm now imagining a bunch of scientific Adams who leave the busywork of actual research to other scientists while they just sit around and invent new cool-sounding names for everything.
posted by Pyrogenesis at 8:26 AM on April 7, 2015
Stegosauruses because they have such lovely plates!
Eponironical!
Also- if Pluto gets to be a planet again, then so does Claire.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:29 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
Eponironical!
Also- if Pluto gets to be a planet again, then so does Claire.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:29 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
did they think it would be cool to see a brontosaurus stand on his hind legs
Yeah, good enough for me.
posted by jeather at 8:31 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
Yeah, good enough for me.
posted by jeather at 8:31 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
I thought they did that for the effect when the dinosaur's front legs come down and it shakes the water glass, because then we see the water glass again with T-Rex and shit is all messed up.
Brontosaurus playing the role of Brontosaurus: Mr. Spielberg, I just don't understand why I'm rearing up on my hind legs here. It actually makes it harder for me to eat the leaves I'm eating.
Spielberg: Look Phil, it isn’t about the tree. We need you to drop down with a thunderous reverberation, because the trope of the water glass is going to come back in the T Rex scene, okay?
Brontosaurus playing the role of Brontosaurus: But it doesn’t make any sense for MY character! I see how it plays in the parallelism to come, but it just doesn’t feel genuine for this character right now. It feels stagey.
Spielberg: Phil, let’s just get the shot. Nobody’s even going to notice the leaf thing.
Brontosaurus playing the role of Brontosaurus: [aside, to other brontosaurus] I went to Juilliard for THIS??
(room317, you are totally right, which is excellent because it will infuriate my father even more, just like how he knows that movies always have wet parking lots and streets because they look better on film, but he hates them because WHY ARE THE STREETS ALWAYS WET EVEN THOUGH IT IS NEVER RAINING WHY)
posted by a fiendish thingy at 8:31 AM on April 7, 2015 [18 favorites]
Brontosaurus playing the role of Brontosaurus: Mr. Spielberg, I just don't understand why I'm rearing up on my hind legs here. It actually makes it harder for me to eat the leaves I'm eating.
Spielberg: Look Phil, it isn’t about the tree. We need you to drop down with a thunderous reverberation, because the trope of the water glass is going to come back in the T Rex scene, okay?
Brontosaurus playing the role of Brontosaurus: But it doesn’t make any sense for MY character! I see how it plays in the parallelism to come, but it just doesn’t feel genuine for this character right now. It feels stagey.
Spielberg: Phil, let’s just get the shot. Nobody’s even going to notice the leaf thing.
Brontosaurus playing the role of Brontosaurus: [aside, to other brontosaurus] I went to Juilliard for THIS??
(room317, you are totally right, which is excellent because it will infuriate my father even more, just like how he knows that movies always have wet parking lots and streets because they look better on film, but he hates them because WHY ARE THE STREETS ALWAYS WET EVEN THOUGH IT IS NEVER RAINING WHY)
posted by a fiendish thingy at 8:31 AM on April 7, 2015 [18 favorites]
As long as they're still thin at one end, much much thicker in the middle, and then thin again at the far end, it's all good.
posted by mhum at 8:32 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by mhum at 8:32 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
Stegosauruses because they have such lovely plates!
Eponironical!
Oh yeah sorry I am not a dinosaur I am a flying lizard. This distinction was VERY IMPORTANT when I was teaching second grade.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 8:32 AM on April 7, 2015 [10 favorites]
Eponironical!
Oh yeah sorry I am not a dinosaur I am a flying lizard. This distinction was VERY IMPORTANT when I was teaching second grade.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 8:32 AM on April 7, 2015 [10 favorites]
is when one of the brontosauruses is eating
Um point of order that is a brachiosaurus.
posted by phunniemee at 8:34 AM on April 7, 2015 [4 favorites]
Um point of order that is a brachiosaurus.
posted by phunniemee at 8:34 AM on April 7, 2015 [4 favorites]
As long as they're still thin at one end, much much thicker in the middle, and then thin again at the far end, it's all good.
That's still only a theory.
posted by you must supply a verb at 8:45 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
That's still only a theory.
posted by you must supply a verb at 8:45 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
“a ravenous cluster of super-evolved dinosaurs are shredding a bleeding corpse 20 feet from my driveway, and I responded by driving around them and fiddling with my radio. I live in Jurassic Park and I am bored by it.”
Wait, is this a Black Friday thread already?
posted by Foosnark at 8:50 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
Wait, is this a Black Friday thread already?
posted by Foosnark at 8:50 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
Oh yeah sorry I am not a dinosaur I am a flying lizard. This distinction was VERY IMPORTANT when I was teaching second grade.
A fuzzy flying... well, actually not a lizard, lizards aren't archosaurs and pterosaurs are, but the important thing is that pterosaurs were super fuzzy and adorable.
posted by sciatrix at 9:08 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
A fuzzy flying... well, actually not a lizard, lizards aren't archosaurs and pterosaurs are, but the important thing is that pterosaurs were super fuzzy and adorable.
posted by sciatrix at 9:08 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
Good news for Roy Wood fans.
Now, this:
Now, this:
posted by Herodios at 9:19 AM on April 7, 2015 [3 favorites]
I'm the brontosaurus, baby, I've got speed
I've got everything I need
I'm the brontosaurus, baby, a sauropod second to none
It's a lot of fun
I'm not the apatosaurus, my pelvis is not the same
When they tried to rub me out, I bounced right back again
I'm the brontosaurus, baby, I'm makin' out
I'm all about
I'm still your big diplodocus, big taxo's biggest boob
Bronto in excelsus! Watch for me on youtube!
I'm the brontosaurus, baby, here's the latest twist --
I do exist!
-- apologies and a tip of the bony skull plates to Neil Innes
Do we really need more Bro's?
posted by Jahaza at 9:43 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Jahaza at 9:43 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
Unlikely that these animals grazed treetops. The difference in blood pressure would be more than an atmosphere if it raised its head all the way.
I believe these were grazing animals, the head extended at ground level and balanced by the tail. Every step created a new arc of grazing. By merely swinging its head side to side it could graze a large area, then take one step and graze another.
posted by Repack Rider at 9:49 AM on April 7, 2015
I believe these were grazing animals, the head extended at ground level and balanced by the tail. Every step created a new arc of grazing. By merely swinging its head side to side it could graze a large area, then take one step and graze another.
posted by Repack Rider at 9:49 AM on April 7, 2015
Bully for Brontosaurus! (Excellent book by Stephen Jay Gould about evolution.)
posted by Triplanetary at 10:02 AM on April 7, 2015
posted by Triplanetary at 10:02 AM on April 7, 2015
Splitters Rule! Lumpers Can Lump It!
Also something about how brontosauruses were suffering taxonomy without representation, just like Washington D.C.
posted by benito.strauss at 10:27 AM on April 7, 2015
Also something about how brontosauruses were suffering taxonomy without representation, just like Washington D.C.
posted by benito.strauss at 10:27 AM on April 7, 2015
"Have you ever seen the Great Valley?"
"No."
"Well, how do you know it's really there? "
"Some things you see with your eyes, others you see with your heart."
Others you see with your heart.
posted by johnnydummkopf at 10:31 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
"No."
"Well, how do you know it's really there? "
"Some things you see with your eyes, others you see with your heart."
Others you see with your heart.
posted by johnnydummkopf at 10:31 AM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
I was surprised at how happy this news made me when I heard it this morning. A little piece of my world I had forgotten about was suddenly made right again.
posted by Blue Meanie at 10:35 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Blue Meanie at 10:35 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
A lot of scenes in Jurassic Park drive my dad CRAZY with illogic, but one of them that he hates the most is when one of the brontosauruses is eating the top of a tree. The dino’s head is already taller than the tree, and he is eating the top of it. And then he rears up to stand on his hind legs (whoaaaa cool 90's CGI, I guess), and has to LOWER HIS HEAD TO KEEP EATING THE SAME LEAVES.
That wasn't a Brontosaurus/Apatosaurus. That was a Brachiosaurus.
It feels like Triceratops not being a thing anymore barely got out the gate...
That's because it never was a thing. It was the product of misleading headlines. There was (Continues to be?) some discussion of Triceratops and Torosaurus being the same genus. Triceratops was named first, so if this turns out to be true it's Torosaurus that would be retired. Unless you're that rare Torosaurus fanboy, you've always been in the clear.
See? Brontosaurus or no, there are plenty of things for paleo nerds like me to be pedantic about.
P.S. Dimetrodon was not a dinosaur.
P.P.S. Neither were pterosaurs.
posted by brundlefly at 11:07 AM on April 7, 2015 [4 favorites]
That wasn't a Brontosaurus/Apatosaurus. That was a Brachiosaurus.
It feels like Triceratops not being a thing anymore barely got out the gate...
That's because it never was a thing. It was the product of misleading headlines. There was (Continues to be?) some discussion of Triceratops and Torosaurus being the same genus. Triceratops was named first, so if this turns out to be true it's Torosaurus that would be retired. Unless you're that rare Torosaurus fanboy, you've always been in the clear.
See? Brontosaurus or no, there are plenty of things for paleo nerds like me to be pedantic about.
P.S. Dimetrodon was not a dinosaur.
P.P.S. Neither were pterosaurs.
posted by brundlefly at 11:07 AM on April 7, 2015 [4 favorites]
Ugh, my daughter just finished her module on dinosaurs in pre-k 1 last week and already her education is out of date.
posted by alms at 11:12 AM on April 7, 2015 [9 favorites]
posted by alms at 11:12 AM on April 7, 2015 [9 favorites]
Today, we will be talking about dinosaurs.
Ladies and gentlemen, put your claws together...
posted by ApathyGirl at 11:59 AM on April 7, 2015
Ladies and gentlemen, put your claws together...
posted by ApathyGirl at 11:59 AM on April 7, 2015
It was never not the brontosaurus to me. I acknowledged the apatosaur redefinition, but in my heart of hearts, always knew that it was wrong.
Because "brontosaurus" is more fun to say. And that's just science.
posted by quin at 12:04 PM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
Because "brontosaurus" is more fun to say. And that's just science.
posted by quin at 12:04 PM on April 7, 2015 [2 favorites]
It really is remarkable that the name stuck around for so long, given that the change was made over a century ago.
posted by brundlefly at 12:15 PM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by brundlefly at 12:15 PM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]
Brontosaurus is back? Quick! To the cloning tubes!
What do you MEAN "We don't have cloning tubes"? Get ON it man!
posted by happyroach at 1:01 PM on April 7, 2015
What do you MEAN "We don't have cloning tubes"? Get ON it man!
posted by happyroach at 1:01 PM on April 7, 2015
I knew the Flintstones would never lie to me.
It's rough when you realize you can trust the Flintstones over those ignorant scientists.
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 4:39 PM on April 7, 2015
It's rough when you realize you can trust the Flintstones over those ignorant scientists.
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 4:39 PM on April 7, 2015
The brontosaurus (skeleton) in the lobby of the American Museum of Natural History is standing on it's hind legs to fight off the velicoraptors coming for the baby brontosaurus and that was assembled by actual scientists, so I suppose that counts as it actually being a thing.
posted by sexyrobot at 5:39 PM on April 7, 2015
posted by sexyrobot at 5:39 PM on April 7, 2015
The long bitter dispute between Emily Bronte and Judd Apatow can finally be resolved.
posted by um at 5:42 PM on April 7, 2015 [6 favorites]
posted by um at 5:42 PM on April 7, 2015 [6 favorites]
P.S. Dimetrodon was not a dinosaur.
As celebrated in song
posted by mikepop at 7:11 AM on April 9, 2015
As celebrated in song
posted by mikepop at 7:11 AM on April 9, 2015
Dinosaurs are basically just Science Pokemon anyway.
posted by Artw at 7:39 AM on April 9, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Artw at 7:39 AM on April 9, 2015 [2 favorites]
I just remembered that Dan Telfer has a five minute routine where he runs down what is the best dinosaur. He'll need to update his brontosaurus chunk now.
posted by mhum at 3:29 PM on April 9, 2015
posted by mhum at 3:29 PM on April 9, 2015
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brontosaurus ++ungoodposted by ennui.bz at 7:18 AM on April 7, 2015