You won't regret that tattoo.
May 27, 2015 11:02 AM   Subscribe

You won't regret that tattoo. Single link Vimeo. A short, sweet first documentary by Angie Bird, via the Tattoo Historian at Tattoo History Daily. (Somewhat previously on the Tattoo Historian, Dr. Anna Felicity Friedman.)
posted by blue suede stockings (100 comments total) 37 users marked this as a favorite
 
In case anyone is wondering, I've been buys so Party Dog isn't done yet.
posted by josher71 at 11:07 AM on May 27, 2015 [27 favorites]


"It'll get all faded and saggy!" Yeah, and so will my ass. Big deal.
posted by showbiz_liz at 11:09 AM on May 27, 2015 [18 favorites]


I don't want to live in a world where anyone regrets the original Party Dog tattoo. (And dammit, I wish the bearer of that mark was one of Bird's interviewees.)

Showbiz_liz, one of the most striking things about the video was how beautiful the old ink on those aging bodies looked, especially in that context and light (figuratively and literally).
posted by blue suede stockings at 11:12 AM on May 27, 2015 [8 favorites]


I would. It's just too permanent a choice for me. I'd eventually grow to hate whatever design I picked. But luckily, not everyone's me, so it's all good.
posted by saulgoodman at 11:12 AM on May 27, 2015 [4 favorites]


"it's all good."
posted by saulgoodman


You do this on purpose, right?

Anyway, I have a tattoo that I guess I should regret, by standards of conventional wisdom, but I just view it as a marker and a memento of where I was in my life at that time. I'm still happy to see it on the rare occasion that I really notice the ink in my skin.
posted by komara at 11:15 AM on May 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


"This horrible Spuds MacKenzie tattoo reminds me of much that lovable canine alcoholic made me laugh."
posted by entropicamericana at 11:16 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


"This horrible Spuds MacKenzie tattoo reminds me of much that lovable canine alcoholic made me laugh."

For me, it was also the doubling down with the cover-up. Or as griphus so memorably put it:

"So what do you want to replace it with?"
"I don't want to replace it. I want you to give it life."

posted by blue suede stockings at 11:19 AM on May 27, 2015 [6 favorites]


It's just too permanent a choice for me. I'd eventually grow to hate whatever design I picked.

My dad always said, look, if you MUST get a tattoo, get it on your back, where you don't have to see it every day if you don't want to.
posted by showbiz_liz at 11:21 AM on May 27, 2015


I started off liking Monica and ended up really liking all of them. A nicely put together series of interviews and perspectives - really good link.

There is plenty of scope for potential regret, I guess a lot of it whether you will or not is just knowing yourself enough and how you deal with stuff before you get one. Not for me. My paternal grandfather was Chief Stoker on a minesweeper in WW2 and as a result ended up with a fairly standard set of naval tattoos. He was not the type to lay out exactly why he got them, I imagine a lot of peer pressure etc, but he absolutely hated them in later life.
posted by biffa at 11:22 AM on May 27, 2015


In a similar vein to Party Dog, one of my college roommates got a godawful homemade tattoo of a skull when he was underage. I took up a collection between our friends and we got an artist to add a straw hat, a Hawaiian shirt, skull hands holding a coconut drink with umbrella, and a sunset in the background. It was much improved.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 11:23 AM on May 27, 2015 [18 favorites]


Bernice charmed me silly. Good for her!
posted by marshmallow peep at 11:25 AM on May 27, 2015 [4 favorites]


A friend of my daughter's woke up and saw a tattooed arm on Facebook. It was his. He did not remember getting the tattoo, due to the usual reason. It was a tattoo of a black guy eating a watermelon. The young man was black. Boy, did he regret that tattoo.

Me, I mulled over my tattoo for twenty years and finally got it last summer (I'm 62). All three of us, a mixed white/Japanese family, went to the ink shop for an 8-hour family outing. My wife and I were born in the Year of the Dragon, so we got giant colorful dragon tattoos; our daughter got a koi. All Japanese style.

No regrets here, Jack!
posted by kozad at 11:27 AM on May 27, 2015 [15 favorites]


All three of us, a mixed white/Japanese family, went to the ink shop for an 8-hour family outing.

Hooray for this. This past winter, my wife, mother-in-law and I had a Family Tattoo Night and it was delightful.
posted by griphus at 11:30 AM on May 27, 2015 [3 favorites]


> I started off liking Monica and ended up really liking all of them. A nicely put together series of interviews and perspectives - really good link.

Me too, this exactly.

I got my first tattoo a year and a day after my mom died, as a memorial. Like Monica, I'm not sure she'd like it - but she's not here to say!

No regrets, not for any of them. And my artist posted a couple of photos of pieces she's done in the last few days and now I want another....
posted by rtha at 11:30 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


You do this on purpose, right?

Sometimes yes, sometimes no. This time it just sort of worked out that way.

posted by saulgoodman at 11:34 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


Frank Turner approves and agrees. [SLYT]
posted by wenestvedt at 11:46 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have a few tattoos. I will regret none of them.
posted by Kitteh at 11:50 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


Regrets, I've had a few, but then again, mom battleship kanji.
posted by maxsparber at 12:09 PM on May 27, 2015 [13 favorites]


I started getting facial piercings in my 40s in large part because I was pulling men who liked the conservative way I dress (I'm SO GLAD that mid-calf skirts are coming back! Whew!) And, like Rick, I got a lot of "whoops!" responses when the tattoo work started to be revealed. I see facial piercings as a Truth in Advertising bid, given that, aside from one tiny tattoo on my wrist and the white tattoo on my forearm, you can't see my tattoo work in the normal course of public interaction, especially in San Francisco, where I tend to wear sweaters, etc.

So if you don't like my tongue stud, labret piercing, nostril piercing or the variety of piercings in my ears, I'm going to bet that you won't like my ink. And then you can just forget about my genital piercings, so here's your hat, what's your hurry.

I wonder what most tattoo discussions would be like if we substituted the word "child" in place of "tattoo." You won't regret that child, don't decide to (be)get a child on the spur of the moment, you think you want a child now, but what will it look like in 20 years?
posted by janey47 at 12:10 PM on May 27, 2015 [10 favorites]


I always like other people's tattoos, but those are the exact questions that keep me from having children.
posted by maxsparber at 12:12 PM on May 27, 2015 [10 favorites]


I've regretted desktop wallpaper choices, so I take that as a sign I might not be a good candidate for a tattoo.
posted by sageleaf at 12:13 PM on May 27, 2015 [39 favorites]


I have two tattoos and I regret both of them. Fortunately one's covered by my shirt and the other's smaller than a band-aid.

I don't have kids, and have never regretted that. So things could be worse.
posted by crazylegs at 12:16 PM on May 27, 2015 [4 favorites]


I wonder what most tattoo discussions would be like if we substituted the word "child" in place of "tattoo."

Well, it took hours, hurt like hell and cost a small fortune, but you know what they say: good children aren't cheap, and cheap children ain't good.
posted by griphus at 12:24 PM on May 27, 2015 [39 favorites]


At work and can't watch the video yet, but can definitely get the gist of it from the comments. I'll repost my comment from this trainwreck of a thread because it seems well -- even better -- suited here:

Not going to wade into the raging argument here, but I will take a moment to comment on the general sentiment of fear of regret keeping one from getting a tattoo. While permanency is something to take into heavy consideration, if you find a design you like at a time in which it is meaningful to you, don't let that fear of the future keep you from following your desires.

Years ago I worked at IBM with a very nice man who was a born-again Christian -- not my bag, but he wasn't overbearing with it, he just took it as something that provided personal comfort and guidance to him, which I respect. Anyway, his arms were covered in ink from before he dedicated himself to Christ, not a cohesive sleeve, just years of piecework obtained as whim dictated. Some of it was obscene, a lot of it was drug related, including a giant pot leaf smack in the middle of one forearm. As part of his rebirth, he had given up all intoxicants and was determined to keep edge for life.

One day, while we were making idle chatter, I asked him about his various tats, and whether he regretted getting them. He said, roughly, "Not one bit. I got them because of who I was then, and that is what they represent. When I was born again, I got this one..." -- and he pointed to one done around the pot leaf that said 'NO MORE KILLER BUD' -- "... to represent me now, and it was done. It's not something I'd do now, but it's done, it's my past, and it's a part of me like a scar. No regrets."

That influenced my thinking a lot, and was in my mind when I finally decided upon something that meant enough to me to get my first one -- a process which, for me at least, made me fear future regret even less. It was on my upper left arm, in a "safe" area. I got a second one that's meaningful to me in a much more obvious area, my inner forearm, when my wife was pregnant with my daughter to represent that life transition. Recently I've been focusing heavily on improving my health and life style. I used to weigh over 300 pounds. After years of struggle I'm currently just above 210, with a goal of 200. When I get to 200, I'm going to get myself a 1/2 or 3/4 sleeve with a rebirth motif to signify that success and change of life. A sleeve is a big commitment, and one I'm aware of the potential future implications of and regret for as I age. However, I'm willing to do it. It's me now, and will represent me now in the future. Done.
posted by jammer at 12:28 PM on May 27, 2015 [13 favorites]


I have two, very similar, 10 years apart. Due for the next one in 6 more. I don't regret them, nor do I expect to; I spend a lot of time thinking about them.

If you treat it like a novelty T-shirt purchase, that's on you — not the practice.

To each their own. And yes, to add to the chorus, my ink will look exactly like me I am older for — better or worse.
posted by Dark Messiah at 12:36 PM on May 27, 2015


I wonder what most tattoo discussions would be like if we substituted the word "child" in place of "tattoo."

The sound of her voice, the smell of the wet grass, the earthy bite of the red wine as they drank together, eyes locked: these things were forever childed in his memory. He sighed in the lonely twilight of his apartment, and, in a bid to clear his head, put on headphones and listened to some k.I.D.z.
posted by cortex at 12:39 PM on May 27, 2015 [5 favorites]


I don't have a tattoo but long ago decided what it would be if I were ever so moved or so drunk: a red reset button.
posted by jim in austin at 12:44 PM on May 27, 2015 [3 favorites]


My gods didn't those people in the documentary charm me to death. How lovely they are, and how lovely their tattoos are as well.

I've got seven tattoos now and wouldn't I have a lot more but for never having much money. A scar on my left elbow from when I was a baby grew with my body over the course of my life and now it looks like I once had a huge, crazy gash. In an oblique kind of way my tattoos conceptually do the same thing: their meaning and importance and feeling tone (and of course their physical appearance as well) keeps pace with me as we age together.

Gabriel Garcia Marquez in his later years reportedly said about his wife, "I know her so well now, I haven't the slightest idea who she really is." The images from which my tattoos arose have asked me to participate in them, and in doing so I've discovered that their mystery and meaning extends far beyond anything my younger self had imagined. I thought I knew what they meant or represented when I got them, and I wasn't exactly wrong, but their meaning -- as with all language -- vastly outstrips my limited idea of them at the time. Once I thought of my tattoos as signposts that told of who I was when I got them; now, I believe that image fails to capture how alive and in progress the tattoos are and can be. My tattoos are not best thought of as the dead wood of signposts; they are the living trees themselves. They are symbiotic creatures inscribed upon and cohabitating with me.

I don't regret a single one of my tattoos and I don't expect I ever will. If anything I've grown more fond of them. Barring cases of impaired judgment (e.g., inebriation) when getting a tattoo, my own personal sense is that if I ever grew to regret any of my tattoos, that would represent an abdication of my responsibility to make meaning out of my past and my body and the permanence of my decisions. It would mean, for me, that I'd given up on a part of myself--that my ego was trying to shear something away from me. Fondness (lack of regret) for even the most embarrassing of my tattoos represents a loving commitment to care for and carry with myself even those parts of me that I might rather hide.

Thanks for posting. Filled with inky love right now.
posted by mister-o at 12:46 PM on May 27, 2015 [14 favorites]


I love my tattoos, I'll never regret them.
posted by gucci mane at 12:47 PM on May 27, 2015 [6 favorites]


It's funny - on an intellectual level I've never bought the "you'll regret that tattoo when you get old" thing. Especially when people go on about name tattoos being a bad idea. If it doesn't work out as a symbol of lifelong commitment you've still got a memento or a warning as the case may be. At the same time I am in practice almost incapable of making the kind of long-term decision that is selecting an image to be implanted in my skin. I can't even decide where I'd get a tattoo.
posted by atoxyl at 12:50 PM on May 27, 2015


My dad always said, look, if you MUST get a tattoo, get it on your back, where you don't have to see it every day if you don't want to.


That was my sister's reasoning 15 years ago when she was a teenager, and she's currently in the process of removing a 4-inch long Celtic tattoo from her lower back. I knew this would happen, which is why I tried to talk her out of it at the time (I'm not against tattoos), but I really wish that she would just own it. She's now complaining about how expensive, painful and time-consuming the process is.
posted by peripathetic at 12:54 PM on May 27, 2015


If I ever got a tattoo, it'd be a tattoo of Tattoo and I'd be, like, yo dawg, I heard you like tattoos so I got a tattoo of Tattoo getting a tattoo of Tattoo.
posted by octobersurprise at 12:57 PM on May 27, 2015 [3 favorites]


I wonder what most tattoo discussions would be like if we substituted the word "child" in place of "tattoo."

I guess the tattoo lovers would be less likely to speak up?
posted by biffa at 1:06 PM on May 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


A family member (a skinny teen) just completed work on a large tattoo of a skull, a flower and surrounding vines and leaves on her upper back.

If she was a van, it would look damn nice on her side panel.

She does not have wheels, alas, so I will be polite and supportive and comfort myself knowing that should she choose future employment that would raise an eyebrow at such adornment, it's more easily covered than many places she might have chosen for it. I am also impressed that her grandparents held themselves back from a full Scanners-level aneurysm over it.
posted by delfin at 1:09 PM on May 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


All of this tattoo talk lately is making me think about getting (or doing it myself w/ india ink and a sewing needle) a little skull-and-crossbones. Thumbnail-sized and over my left ankle. If I do so, it will be either my 4th, 5th, 13th, 14th, or an addition to my only tattoo. Depending on how we're counting. I like to change it up. Why not?

Of all the things on my body that are ageing in my 48th year, my tattoo(s) (is/are) probably holding up the best, really. My hair, when I stop shaving it off, turns out there isn't much left anyway, and It's not the color I'd have gone with if I were going to grow it out. My skin, tattooed or not, is wrinkly and flabby and definitely not 25 any more. (some of my tattoo(s) is/are 25 years old) All 7 of my ear-piercings have all closed up, I think. No hurry to test that theory. Lower-back pain. Upper-back pain. Bursitis. Some spots on my skin that are probably melanomas if family history means anything. Gotta get those checked out. But my ink? It's doing fine and dandy. Dependably right where I put it.

One of my older brothers has ink, the other doesn't. My 18 year old girl has ink. My wife does not. Her mother is bothered by tattoos. But she's bothered by all kinds of stuff, really. She thinks one of her daughter's lesbianism is a "phase" (she's been married to her spouse for over 20 years and they were able to make it legal here in Florida not long ago). So I think of being bothered by tattoos as kind of an "old person" thing.

So yeah, I love this video. Old people who got tattoos when they were young. Or when they were old. Showing them off, talking about them. Most people don't see mine, they're covered by clothes unless I'm at the beach, and I think it's brave as hell to go on the record like that talking about why they got them.
posted by Cookiebastard at 1:13 PM on May 27, 2015 [4 favorites]


Je ne regrette rien.
posted by Kabanos at 1:16 PM on May 27, 2015


I figured that when i got a tattoo, it would be words of some sort. But I couldn't think of anything that really spoke to me, that I wouldn't get tired of eventually, so that kept me from moving forward. One epiphany later, I got the alphabet tattooed around my ankle.

Sometimes when people look at it they'll offhandedly remark, "oh, I though it spelled something", but then I'm like "well duh, it spells everything."
posted by hopeless romantique at 1:17 PM on May 27, 2015 [25 favorites]


For the first 27 or so years of my life, my mother said "if you ever get a tattoo I will cry and cry and cry."

Then she said "Well, I suppose it would be *okay* if you got one..." (I got my first one about two weeks later.)

Then she said "Your father is going to pay for a tattoo as a Valentine's Day gift! Where should I go?" and she got two shamrocks on her foot, to represent my sister and me.

When she died, I got a shamrock to represent her.
posted by Lucinda at 1:24 PM on May 27, 2015 [30 favorites]




Real conversation from my daughter's eighteenth birthday breakfast with Dad.
Dad,"TELL ME THAT'S NOT A REAL TATTOO! TELL ME THAT'S NOT A REAL TATTOO!"
Dau,"Yup, it's a real tattoo."
Dad, "Want did your mother say about that? Did she say it's OK?"
Dau,"Mom can't say anything, I'm eighteen now."

At this point later, back from her birthday breakfast with Dad, as she tells the tale, I am laughing until I choke. I hadn't let her get a tattoo because she was underage. Maybe she got it because it was the one thimg I said no to, but I doubt that.

If I ever get tattoos, they will be eyeliner, and a small necklace of blue beads with highlights. Then I'll get rid of my eyeliner and jewelry. Simplify, simplify.
posted by Oyéah at 1:25 PM on May 27, 2015


...to get my first one -- a process which, for me at least, made me fear future regret even less...

Seconded. When I got my first tattoo, it was a big deal. I worried about regret, and I worried about, I don't know, doing something to my body that in some ineffable way would change me for the worse. I fretted and fretted and eventually did it.

When I got my most recent tattoo, I noodled over the design for a few weeks and that was that.

I do wonder if that lowered resistance to getting another tattoo will eventually lead to my getting one that I regret. I doubt it would be much regret, though. In the end, it's just a bit of ink; it means as much as you want it to.
posted by gurple at 1:25 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I loved this, thanks for posting it. I didn't expect it to be so moving but it really was. I was 24 when I got mine and I've never regretted it for a second. My sister (who disapproves of all my life choices) rolled her eyes so it pleases me greatly now that her kids ask to see it sometimes - "Auntie billiebee can we see your picture?" - and the 5 year old loves transfer tattoos and has announced she'll be getting a rose when she's bigger. I'll probably offer to pay for it just cos it'll piss her parents off so much. (Not really. And yet...) I've been planning my second for about 4 years now. I know what I want but like the first one I know there'll be a moment when I just feel "ok, now" and just go and get it done. And I won't regret that one either.
posted by billiebee at 1:28 PM on May 27, 2015


I am extremely amused that I saw this post seconds after sending an updated design proposal for a tattoo that several friends and I are planning on getting to commemorate a years-long hugely (within out social group) visible project we all work our asses off on.
No, I don't think I will.
posted by flaterik at 1:31 PM on May 27, 2015


I do wonder if that lowered resistance to getting another tattoo will eventually lead to my getting one that I regret.

At least in my (possibly tattooed in above-average quantities) peer group, I've noticed that it's almost a foregone conclusion that you're going to end up with at tattoo you, in some way, regret. Not, like "my god, I've defaced my corporeal form forever" regret but "I mean I like the Dead Kennedys but I'm not so sure I DK-logo-on-my-wrist like them." The solution often seems to be to get so many that the regrettable ones are just background radiation.

I do wonder about that 7-ft-tall, brick shithouse hardcore guy who hung around St. Mark's smoking cigarettes with enormous, thick black Xes tattooed on his hands though.
posted by griphus at 1:39 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oyeah, I have tattooed eyeliner and a fair number of tattoos (as well as the aforementioned genital piercings etc), and the touch up on the eyeliner was quite seriously the most pain I have ever voluntarily submitted to.
posted by janey47 at 1:44 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'd offer two VERY STRONG suggestions:

Get the name of your kid, your pet or just MOM or DAD. (You never see a DAD tattoo. Why not?) Any other name will almost inevitably lead to regret. (Ask Johnny Depp.)

Go for a simple design and be very, very careful with colors. All-black is good. You may scoff at those people who have some simple, all-black tribal symbol, but nobody sees those tattoos across a room and has to swallow a gasp because they think they're looking at a huge, disfiguring burn scar. A lot of big, colorful tattoos that look cool up close look like your skin is melting when somebody sees them from 10 feet away.

(Maybe that stuff comes up in the documentary. Don't have time to watch it just now.)
posted by Ursula Hitler at 2:42 PM on May 27, 2015


Tattooed eyeliner seriously changed my life. It's incredible.
posted by erratic meatsack at 2:49 PM on May 27, 2015


You might regret that tattoo.
posted by ethnomethodologist at 2:55 PM on May 27, 2015


The one time you're pretty sure to regret a tattoo is if Henry Rollins drives you there. Okay, maybe not precisely TO there.
posted by delfin at 2:59 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


> A lot of big, colorful tattoos that look cool up close look like your skin is melting when somebody sees them from 10 feet away

If I'm ever in a situation where I'm looking at my tattoos from 10 feet away I'm going to have more to worry about than if they're still pretty.
posted by The corpse in the library at 3:01 PM on May 27, 2015 [17 favorites]


I'm not anti-tattoo at all. But if something is going to make you look like you've been in a terrible fire, it's probably good to know that before you get it. This is something that will be with you the rest of your life, and walking around looking like you have patches of red, raw, weeping skin is no small thing.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 3:23 PM on May 27, 2015


Yeah, I concur with 23skidoo. Like, it's about tattoos, sort of, but it's about much more than that. Thank you for posting it, blue suede stockings--it's really a perfect little documentary. Man, Angie Bird is good. You can tell she really connects with her subjects.

They are all so personable and interesting--I feel like I would like to sit down and talk to each of them. But I think my favourites are Rick and Bernice. Rick's story at 5:40 is heartbreaking. No one should have to carry that around with them.

And Bernice! (What a great Newfoundland accent.) She is just lovely and openhearted. My favourite bit is at the end when she is showing her tattoo: "I think I'm a butterfly. At this stage of my life now for sure, 'cause I've been, like I said, in a cocoon. I think I'm beautiful now. I like who I am--I'm happy!"
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 3:35 PM on May 27, 2015 [3 favorites]


> (Maybe that stuff comes up in the documentary. Don't have time to watch it just now.)

It does not. The people in the film don't talk about how their tattoos look to other people, but to them, and what they mean to their own selves.
posted by rtha at 3:56 PM on May 27, 2015 [5 favorites]


So, all that ever matters is how something looks to you, and if something gives people an impression you did not intend, an impression that you are literally bearing disfiguring wounds, who gives a darn? Even if you didn't know your tattoo looks like a patch of bloody skin, finding that out wouldn't make you regret the decision one bit?

Again, I'm not anti-tattoo. I know people with tattoos, I've seen plenty of great tattoos. I'm with you up to a point, and what you think of your tattoo indeed matters far more than what other people think. I'm trans, so believe me, I know the frustrations of people clucking their tongues at you and trying to control you under the guise of being "helpful". But this isn't about trying to quash somebody's desires or harsh their buzz or whatever the flip. It's about letting them know that the pair of pants they're about to buy has a big KICK ME printed on the ass. Maybe they still want to buy the KICK ME pants, but they should buy them knowing that's what they're getting.

I wasn't assuming any of that came up in the film, but I wanted to avoid having somebody tell me to WTFF, or whatever the go-to snarky acronym would be.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 4:49 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


Well they do sort of address it. Bernice tells the story of the grandma who lectured her on the subway and Rick talks about deciding to put all his chips on the table during a blind date that had been going well and show his sleeves and having her immediately reject him. And Maria is intercut between their remarks saying, "Well opinions are like assholes, everyone's got one and they all stink." So they do address the fact other people's immediate impressions are sometimes negatively affected by this choice, but the tone from the interviewed participants appears to be that's their problem not mine. They do not address specific color choices.
posted by edbles at 4:59 PM on May 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


I'd offer two VERY STRONG suggestions:

Get the name of your kid, your pet or just MOM or DAD. (You never see a DAD tattoo. Why not?) Any other name will almost inevitably lead to regret. (Ask Johnny Depp.)

Go for a simple design and be very, very careful with colors. All-black is good. You may scoff at those people who have some simple, all-black tribal symbol, but nobody sees those tattoos across a room and has to swallow a gasp because they think they're looking at a huge, disfiguring burn scar. A lot of big, colorful tattoos that look cool up close look like your skin is melting when somebody sees them from 10 feet away.

(Maybe that stuff comes up in the documentary. Don't have time to watch it just now.)


This...this has nothing at all to really do with the doco and it's also kinda shitty advice? I know people who regret getting 'mom' and I know people who have other names who don't, and the colour thing is...well fucking stupid, to be blunt. Even without my glasses (thus legally bloody blind) I've never thought a tattoo was a burn or a wound (unless that was the intent). That's just...that's a really personal thing, you realise that right? That your perception is one I've never come across* at all, ever, about colourful tattoos.

My Da hates tattoos and I never really understood why I should care what he thinks. People always ask me, after a tattoo (or my shaved head, or any haircut) 'what does the other anachronism think?' and it reveals this unsettling level of entitlement that is expected to be had over my body. Yes, it does affect people's perceptions of my to find out the nice middle class white mama has tattoos, but it's pretty common now so the disruption is usually about the images themselves (heavy black mostly, one white ink, a little bit of red, large thigh pieces) rather than just having one. A shaved head has had far more of an affect than anything else.

But honestly, the 'DISFIGURING WOUND' is so far out of left field I honestly wonder where the hell it comes from. I've seen lots of tattoos, from close and far away, and some of them have even had lots of red work, and I've never ever once mistaken them for anything other than tattoos (or that one time I thought it was a lace underlay, damn that was some pretty work). But more than that it is unhelpful because it prioritizes a very odd and very specific misreading and misperception over the work and the meaning of the thing. It just reminds me of those times where I'm going somewhere and suddenly someone pipes up with an urban legend to 'warn' me about something - it 100% is absolutely about societal control, no matter how well-meaning the warning is.

*my white ink tattoo however, literally looked like a burn as it healed. It now looks like a white spiral scar, if you're close enough and lucky enough for me to show you it.
posted by geek anachronism at 5:23 PM on May 27, 2015 [14 favorites]


I certainly don't anticipate regretting my tattoo. I got it at 37 years old, literally mere months ago. My only potential cause for regret at all is that it's in a place where I can't ogle it. Personally, I think it looks awesome.
posted by ChrisR at 5:24 PM on May 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


Well they do sort of address it.

Yep, the only guy who talks about regretting one of his tattoos and then actually lasering it off explains he did so because he didn't want to serve an upcoming stint in jail with a naked lady tattoo on his back.

So, all that ever matters is how something looks to you, and if something gives people an impression you did not intend, an impression that you are literally bearing disfiguring wounds, who gives a darn? Even if you didn't know your tattoo looks like a patch of bloody skin, finding that out wouldn't make you regret the decision one bit?

So this gets complicated. Tattoo artists are notoriously grumpy about folks who want upside-down tattoos by clients who say they want it that way "because it's for me"; I also think that whether or not someone thinks a tattoo of mine (I'm not saying I do or don't have one) makes me look butch, disfigured, cheap, burned, etc. is something I may be asserting I don't care about precisely because that tattoo might be saying, "fuck what you think about what this means or looks like--my body, my tattoo." For women especially, there's something incredibly reclaimative about tattoos.

Get the name of your kid, your pet or just MOM or DAD. (You never see a DAD tattoo. Why not?) Any other name will almost inevitably lead to regret. (Ask Johnny Depp.)

One of the sweetest stories in the (very, very short documentary) involves a name tattoo that just worked. It's beautiful. And then there's this story by one of Metafilter's own. (That being said, I would never ever tattoo the name of anyone except a child--and I think a DAD tattoo is a cute idea.)
posted by blue suede stockings at 5:27 PM on May 27, 2015


People always say you're going to regret tattoos when you're old because of the way they look on your sagging skin. And they say you won't be able to work with tattoos and piercings.

I'm 63. My tattoos look *excellent* on my sagging skin, and my middle school principal thinks they're pretty decent. I don't show them off to the sixth graders I teach, because it's none of their business, but I won't hesitate to wear a sleeveless shirt to the faculty picnic next week.

I want to get another shoulder tattoo but haven't decided on the design. And I took my time on my second tattoo, even walking out and forfeiting my deposit when the first artist I went to wouldn't work with my idea.

Your skin's gonna sag no matter what you do unless you're into something more drastic than tattoos, such as plastic surgery.
posted by Peach at 6:54 PM on May 27, 2015 [5 favorites]


Oh, and a story: I went to the tattoo convention in my city and when I tried to buy a ticket, they asked me if I actually wanted the home convention next door. That's what I look like.
posted by Peach at 6:56 PM on May 27, 2015 [10 favorites]


"It'll get all faded and saggy!" Yeah, and so will my ass. Big deal.

Yeah, and eventually it will get all FOREVER RECEDED INTO OBLIVION. Just like YOU, ME, and EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE UNIVERSE
posted by threeants at 7:06 PM on May 27, 2015 [5 favorites]


Oh my GOD this was fantastic. On every level. And it resonated with me so much.

I got my first tattoo in my mid-late 30s (I'm 45 now), a tiny little triskele on my foot. I had just joined Flickr, and I was beginning to allow that maybe I was indeed a decent photographer, maybe even (gasp!) an "artist." People liked me as I was, and it was so unbelievably validating. My sense of self-worth was in the shitter at the time. I was lovelessly married to someone because he was safe, and I'd felt invisible for a very long time (without even realizing it - I thought I was happy). I've always been fat, and have gone through phases where I can't even look at myself in the mirror. Suddenly I was meeting people and making art and discovering the magic of bravery.

That little fucking triskele changed everything.

People noticed it. I was proud of it. I was proud of myself for having done it. It became a badge: This is me. I'm not just someone who'd get a tattoo. I'm someone who has a tattoo. Someone upthread mentioned reclamation, and that's exactly right. Reclaiming my sense of self-worth was like reclaiming something I didn't even know had been sitting there in the lost and found room at the train station for 37 years. It had been there all along, waiting until I was brave enough to hand over my ticket and take it home.

I have more than a dozen tattoos now - a massive sugar skull, Roger Peterson silhouettes of turkey vultures, a Joe Strummer quote, a maneki neko, the word "forgive," an Argus camera symbol, and more. They all carry immense meaning. I have talked about them in therapy over the years, how they're signposts, markers of moments and transitions. Sometimes people stare and shudder, sometimes people complement them. I still can't believe I had to courage to get them. And I'm already working on designs for the next one.

I'm still fat. I still have red hair. And I got divorced and married my college sweetheart and I've had several photography exhibits and I walk around with a nascent sense of ownership of my own awesomeness. (Not quite at the opinions-are-like-assholes point, but it's something I aspire to.) I still can't believe I've achieved all those things, am all those things. But the ink is there to remind me.

And yep, some of that ink has blurred over time. Some need touch-up work. But they are still there. And I am still here. And we'll age in awesomeness together.

(Sorry to go on and on. This post and thread really, really moved me.)
posted by flyingsquirrel at 7:09 PM on May 27, 2015 [15 favorites]


The documentary is fantastic, and I ended up wanting to spend time with all of the people in it. I loved their stories and the glimpses into their lives.

or doing it myself w/ india ink and a sewing needle

I did my first tattoo that way when I was a teenager. I forget that it is there until I see it randomly once in a while, and it is always a bit of a surprise. Well over 20 years later I still like the little blurry thing -- but if you want to have well-done art on your skin that will age well, go see a professional. The one I paid for that is almost as old looks, if not new, at least in good shape, and is probably the cheapest thing I have ever paid for in terms of still making me happy decades later.

I have slow-moving plans for more tattoos, both large and small, and will get there sooner or later.

But honestly, the 'DISFIGURING WOUND' is so far out of left field I honestly wonder where the hell it comes from.

No kidding. Weird derail comments are going to happen no matter what, I guess, but that was a particularly random one.
posted by Dip Flash at 7:25 PM on May 27, 2015 [3 favorites]


But honestly, the 'DISFIGURING WOUND' is so far out of left field I honestly wonder where the hell it comes from.

I responded to this once already and I didn't think what I said was harsh but it was swiftly deleted anyhow. So, I'll just say that this is something you seem to have very strong opinions about and I don't want to argue about it.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 7:46 PM on May 27, 2015


...if you want to have well-done art on your skin that will age well...

Yeah, I did my first tattoo, just a single poke with India ink, many years ago. Some time later I used it as the starting point for a little quarter-note that I also did myself. Several years after that I had a pro do a ring of music notes that integrated that note into the design. She suggested the possibility of her going over my homemade note so they would match better but I decided to keep it the way it was, and she didn't push the issue and I'm OK with that.

I'm undecided if I want my little skull and crosssbones to be well-done and pro or not. I do like the blurriness of the homemade, and something about doing it myself, this teenage goofy thing at age 48, appeals to me. But, yeah, I might want it to actually look good. That's not outside the realm of possibility.
posted by Cookiebastard at 8:07 PM on May 27, 2015


The story about the anonymous black guy with the watermelon tattoo was HILARIOUS! Keep them coming!
posted by Wood at 8:13 PM on May 27, 2015


Even if you didn't know your tattoo looks like a patch of bloody skin

If someone has a tattoo that looks like a patch of bloody skin, it is because that is what they wanted, and because they found a talented tattoo artist capable of rendering it. This is not something that would ever happen by accident.
posted by Mars Saxman at 8:25 PM on May 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


I definitely like seeing how work ages. My tattooist was talking to me about tattoo history and how we're seeing a lot of the work from the 90s disappear and be reworked, lasered off, covered up, in a way that didn't seem to happen with earlier motifs/styles/pieces.

There are quality differences though, even with professionals. My wrist tattoo aged very differently than those of two of my relatives, and that affects how they look - there's the blurring of age, the softening and the blueing of the black, and then there's uneven, blownout, scarred up* and otherwise messy work that then ages.

That said, I love a lot of those tiny hand poked things people have. I like the messiness, I feel like it has a different quality to 'professional fucked up' messiness.

*I scar really easily, really really easily, so all of my ink will noticeably puff up with that scarring when I'm sick, or cold, or any other external thing affecting scar tissue. It's neat, but it does affect how I plan out work.
posted by geek anachronism at 8:28 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


*I scar really easily, really really easily, so all of my ink will noticeably puff up with that scarring when I'm sick, or cold, or any other external thing affecting scar tissue. It's neat, but it does affect how I plan out work.

Mine do that too! Normally the inked skin is totally indistinguishable by touch from the skin around it, but whenever I get a cold or even just get really stressed it turns into tattoo-braille.
posted by Dip Flash at 8:31 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I've gotten a lot of advice over the years - from tattoo artists, from other people with tattoos, from people without tattoos - about what to think about when getting tattooed, but "consider that design may look like a raw wound in 20 years" has never been among the advice given. Maybe I've just been lucky.

The (very heavy) blackwork pieces I had done in the mid-90s have blurred around the edges, but still look fine to me. The greywork juvenile red-tailed hawk on my left forearm is still lovely; the kestrel and the dragonfly - both less than two years old - are so far my only pieces of color and are gorgeous. Because I don't want to make my artist cry (she is a friend and we have many friends in common, and it's a damn small town!), I keep them protected from the sun as best I can. I expect they will both fade a little over the years, and the fine lines will get a little blurry. I am good with that. I will be good with changes to tattoos I haven't even gotten yet.

On preview:

> Mine do that too! Normally the inked skin is totally indistinguishable by touch from the skin around it, but whenever I get a cold or even just get really stressed it turns into tattoo-braille.

Yes! My blackwork pieces raise up when I am sick or having allergy symptoms (thanks, coyote bush!). It's kind of cool. I haven't noticed this with the kestrel, though it is heavily inked, and part of it runs over an old but large keloided scar on my arm.
posted by rtha at 8:38 PM on May 27, 2015


Anyway, thanks for posting this video, it was really beautiful. It was empowering and touching to see people talking about these ways that they were able to stake out a little agency in their lives and claim their bodies for themselves.
posted by threeants at 8:53 PM on May 27, 2015 [3 favorites]


Tattoos that "age well" are not necessarily tattoos that look new. I appreciate a blurry, blue tattoo on an old person.

One of my tattoos gets puffy and the other one doesn't, for reasons beyond me.
posted by The corpse in the library at 8:53 PM on May 27, 2015


I have no tattoos and no immediate plans to get any - not against them, and I always enjoy seeing other peoples'; I just haven't felt drawn (sorry) to any particular one for myself yet. Nevertheless the documentary was a joy and the entire thread has been fascinating to read.
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:53 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


If you're the sort of person who might regret a tattoo, they aren't for you. The idea of a tattoo is not to love something forever, but to love something at some point in time. Regret is not a part of the calculation.

If you are looking for a tattoo that will look good until you die and mean the same thing until you die, your thought issues are larger than tattoos.

I hope all my tattoos remind me only of how I thought about something sometime. And I hope I think differently now or what have I done?
posted by Lutoslawski at 9:49 PM on May 27, 2015 [14 favorites]


This is making me really want to get the one I've had in mind for a long time, which is some text on the side of my wrist/arm. I'm not worried about regretting the text, but how do pick a typeface I won't regret???
posted by NoraReed at 10:03 PM on May 27, 2015


Yeah, typefaces are difficult. My partner settled on something he wrote, so maybe that might work?

My tattooist, who is slightly alternative (LOL), says that the reason tattoos swell and puff is that it is a toxic substance under your skin. She's covered in lots of them, but it might explain why some tattoos respond like that and others don't. My thighs are worse than my wrist, but my shoulder is effectively just a scar at this point.
posted by geek anachronism at 11:41 PM on May 27, 2015


Next year when I turn 50 I'm getting a Beta Ray Bill back piece. I want this image (without the text) surrounded by the words in this last panel. It'll be my first tattoo. I'm tired of indecision and analysis paralysis.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 2:50 AM on May 28, 2015 [3 favorites]


I'm covered in tattoos (covered enough that there's no longer any meaningful way to count them, so when asked I just say I have 'one'). None of them mean shit, and I'll tattoo damn near anything on a whim (I'm fond of just telling tattooers I like to do whatever they feel like). I don't regret any of them, not even the ones that have been long since covered up.
posted by still bill at 3:20 AM on May 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm undecided if I want my little skull and crosssbones to be well-done and pro or not.

If you don't want to decide between "stick and poke" and "professionally done," you can totally have both.
posted by blue suede stockings at 4:17 AM on May 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


Seconding blue suede stockings: professionally done hand poked stuff is awesome. In the UK, check out Into You tattoo in London and Brighton if you're into that.
posted by still bill at 4:48 AM on May 28, 2015


The idea you can't get work if you're tatooed is definitely bunk. My wife just got two great professional job offers in the span of a week and she's got a few conspicuous tattoos and doesn't regret them for a minute. Her tattoos are beautiful and sexy, but I know myself enough to know I don't want/need one.
posted by saulgoodman at 4:54 AM on May 28, 2015


I wanted to tell y'all that the Lower Back Tattoo thread and the MeTa about it inspired me to have a 20-year-old piece on my left upper arm refreshed and expanded. I've felt so-so about my ink for a couple of years but I am now inspired to own it and show it to the world. My appointment is on June 8, and I'll be taking before- and after-photos. So, thanks!
posted by workerant at 8:17 AM on May 28, 2015 [8 favorites]


If you're the sort of person who might regret a tattoo, they aren't for you. The idea of a tattoo is not to love something forever, but to love something at some point in time. Regret is not a part of the calculation.

If you are looking for a tattoo that will look good until you die and mean the same thing until you die, your thought issues are larger than tattoos.


I'm normally fairly snarky about tattoos, and am even prone to quoting Charlie Brooker ("I don't need you to tell me what your tattoo 'means'... they all mean 'I should not have done this'") but I will acknowledge that this is the best explanation of tattoos I have ever read and makes complete and total sense to me.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:24 AM on May 28, 2015


I have one that I sort of regret, mostly because I picked at it so much while it was healing that it looks not so great, but I don't like it or care about it enough to get it touched up. I sort of want to get it removed but idk if I have the right skin type for it, and also $$$.

i will probably continue not really caring about it for another 20 years or so
posted by poffin boffin at 9:27 AM on May 28, 2015


also i still want party dog but am undecided on where it should go
posted by poffin boffin at 9:28 AM on May 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


forehead
posted by you must supply a verb at 9:32 AM on May 28, 2015


Everywhere, like when wallpaper on computer screens were just one image tiled over and over and over again.
posted by maxsparber at 9:37 AM on May 28, 2015 [5 favorites]


Party Dog is inside all of us.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 9:37 AM on May 28, 2015


the palm of the hand idea was good
posted by you must supply a verb at 9:41 AM on May 28, 2015


I was talking to my SO about this thread and he told me that his brother got the name of a paramilitary organisation tattooed on his forearm when he was about 15. By age 20 he wanted it removed (as he realised he may as well have got a target done on his forehead). It was about 30 years ago, before laser removal, so he had to go to hospital to have it cut off. The doctor (he thinks deliberately, to teach him a lesson or because he had a particular hatred for the organisation) cut a really deep wedge of flesh out of his arm to remove it so that he was left with a really large, deep wound and subsequent scar. I mention it just because it's the only story I've heard of anyone really regretting a tattoo so I guess this is the place to leave it.
posted by billiebee at 10:32 AM on May 28, 2015


I am really hoping that when I am a wrinkly bag of eighty-year-old bones I have no regrets about the cosmic dragon wings on the backs of my arms.

Except maybe the regret I'll have forty years later that I didn't flay the skin off my old body and hang it on the wall of my modest little robot lady dwelling. But hey, maybe I'll have polychromatic skin that displays a more intense version with gently flowing nebulae and twinkling stars.

It marked some big changes in my life, you know?
posted by egypturnash at 11:32 AM on May 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


I can hardly believe this - after reading this thread, now I'm seriously pondering the idea of a giant colorful Celtic dragon tattoo: the head on one side of my upper chest, the neck going over my shoulder, the body wandering across my back, and the tail winding down around my opposite thigh. Now that'd be some damn art! Although as someone said upthread it might not matter, even so nothing would be visible in a "professional" situation - I'd actually have to be shirtless for anyone to see anything.

I really love this notion; my only hesitation is the amount of money and pain involved. Anybody think they can talk me out of (or goad me further up) the tree?
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:13 PM on May 28, 2015 [3 favorites]


DON'T DO IT!

(Seriously, though, do it.)
posted by maxsparber at 12:25 PM on May 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


You can do it a little at a time, so that you and the tattoo artist are collaborating on bringing an artistic idea to life over a period of time. You'll remember various stages of your life when you look back over the finished piece. The day you have it finished will feel like a total achievement.

TL;DR - Do it! Do it!
posted by billiebee at 12:26 PM on May 28, 2015 [7 favorites]


> Anybody think they can talk me out of (or goad me further up) the tree

Well, there's someone named Charlie Brooker who thinks you shouldn't do it.
posted by The corpse in the library at 1:36 PM on May 28, 2015


I'll tell him it means "snarky British comedians can kiss my ass"! :)
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:21 PM on May 28, 2015


i really really adore that kind of committed full body piece. The pain and cost are one thing, but it is such an intense thing to do, and they're usually so beautiful because of the scale, and the thought that has to go into it.
posted by geek anachronism at 4:56 PM on May 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


Greg_Ace > I'm seriously pondering the idea of a giant colorful Celtic dragon tattoo

DO IT DO IT DO IT

i may be biased of course
posted by egypturnash at 1:32 PM on June 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


giant colorful Celtic dragon tattoo: the head on one side of my upper chest, the neck going over my shoulder, the body wandering across my back, and the tail winding down around my opposite thigh.

*advances slide*

Do you see?
posted by entropicamericana at 3:05 PM on June 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


Except maybe the regret I'll have forty years later that I didn't flay the skin off my old body and hang it on the wall of my modest little robot lady dwelling. But hey, maybe I'll have polychromatic skin that displays a more intense version with gently flowing nebulae and twinkling stars.

Maybe in the future your new body will have actual dragon wings. Screw the jetpack.
posted by homunculus at 10:59 AM on June 10, 2015


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