Film noir, Monica Lewinsky style.

February 25, 2002 5:26 PM

Film noir, Monica Lewinsky style. As of January 22, 2001, Lewinsky was free to talk about the events that led to her immunity agreement with Ken Starr. HBO signed her up for some audience Q & A, and has taken this opportunity to push the envelope by filming it in black and white. It's set to premiere on March 3. Slightly more here. Really though, what's the point? Let's just put her in a zoo and let the patrons throw her peanuts.
posted by mikhail (46 comments total)

Throw peanuts? Because she's not slim? That's not very nice.
posted by ColdChef at 5:36 PM on February 25, 2002

Is it me or has Monica gone up about six points on the pretty scale?

Not quite a ten yet, but still.. something's different.
posted by dopamine at 5:41 PM on February 25, 2002

Monica got a really raw deal. I hope she makes a bit of cash from her 15 minutes, she deserves it.
posted by phatboy at 5:42 PM on February 25, 2002

Really though, what's the point?

er, ratings?
posted by victors at 5:48 PM on February 25, 2002

Aren't her fifteen minutes of fame already over though? Bill Clinton's old news. If she had any other talent beyond making an idiot of herself before the nation, I'd give her some chops. She can't act or sing or even be a decent news commentator. Can she do needlepoint? Her claim to fame is being the other woman. Big deal. She doesn't deserve cashing in. The guy who played Urkel deserves more fame than she does.
posted by ZachsMind at 6:00 PM on February 25, 2002

I'm with Phatboy on this. Monica indured pretty intense speculation about everything from her weight to her intelligence during the scandal. I think she managed to endure the scrutiny and rumors with class and humor...and I don't care what any of y'all say to the contrary...she's hot!
posted by black8 at 6:01 PM on February 25, 2002

ColdChef, I meant that more along the lines of putting her someplace public and letting people pay to gawk, which is pretty much what's going on anyway. Had nothing to do with weight.

phatboy said: Monica got a really raw deal. I hope she makes a bit of cash from her 15 minutes, she deserves it.

You can't be serious. She's no victim, and she's had more than 15 minutes already.
posted by mikhail at 6:01 PM on February 25, 2002

Excuse me, how is filming in black and white pushing the envelope? HBO is a so called premium channel... can't they afford to shoot in color?

I bet they'll make it widescreen too for the illusion of it being really special.
posted by Keen at 6:04 PM on February 25, 2002

Excuse me, how is filming in black and white pushing the envelope? It's called sarcasm. Perhaps you've heard of it.
posted by mikhail at 6:05 PM on February 25, 2002

It's called sarcasm. Perhaps you've heard of it

I have, sometimes it's easier to recognize when it's written better.

As for a Lewinsky movie, history is never old news and whether we like it or not, Monic Lewinsky is a name that will go down in history.
posted by eyeballkid at 6:18 PM on February 25, 2002

eyeballkid, now your being sarcastic.
posted by mikhail at 6:21 PM on February 25, 2002

Wow, how about that? Dissing someone's writing and I can't spell "Monica." Maybe someone should be tossing me peanuts.
posted by eyeballkid at 6:21 PM on February 25, 2002

The guy who played Urkel deserves more fame than she does. -ZachsMind

Yeah, what ever happened to Jaleel White anyway?

Actually ZachsMind, I agree with you. The people still interested in this melodrama are probably the same people who attend Jerry Springer shows. As guests.
posted by insomnyuk at 6:21 PM on February 25, 2002

> I bet they'll make it widescreen too

Another fat joke! Mean!
posted by jfuller at 6:22 PM on February 25, 2002

...and next time I'll remember to bring my <sarcasm></sarcasm> tags.

That was sarcastic, in case you missed it.
posted by mikhail at 6:24 PM on February 25, 2002

Here's betting she uses the word "sensual" a lot. Or maybe that was just a phase...
posted by Ty Webb at 6:33 PM on February 25, 2002

Maybe this occasion will allow us to consider what should have been the central question of the Lewinsky affair: How the bloody hell did this twit get an intern position at the White House?
posted by Ty Webb at 6:36 PM on February 25, 2002

I get the feeling that Monica Lewinsky is one of those people who will be a lot more interesting 20 years from now when she's the subject of a documentary on the History Channel and I'll turn to my girlfreind as we watch it, and say "Oh, yeah Monica, I remember her.." Or, at least that's the way it always seems with every other minor historical figure I've come across. Odd, in a way.

As of right now, I'll just as soon skip any Lewinsky-related material. Wake me up when I'm in my dotage.
posted by jonmc at 6:41 PM on February 25, 2002

i don't understand why people are so "proud" of her for the way she handled things and that she handled this w/class. she's has no class. let's be real...she gave the president a blowjob(who happened to be married) and he spooged all over her blue dress. what is there to discuss? why is she proud of this and running around doing barbara walters interviews? isn't she embarrassed of her actions? is she proud of herself when her parent's have to admit that she is their daughter...the one who gave the president a blowjob and stuck cigars up her...erm.

none of this excuses the actions of clinton but it's disgusting seeing her enjoying this so much. her 15 minutes are up. would she please go away?
posted by suprfli at 6:48 PM on February 25, 2002

I think it's interesting that the same types of people who profited from her telling her story first time around are suddenly disgusted that she's trying to profit from it now.

Silly politics.
posted by dogmatic at 7:28 PM on February 25, 2002

eyeballkid: Monic Lewinsky is a name that will go down in history.

The choice of words was unintentional, right...? (snicker)
posted by davidmsc at 7:53 PM on February 25, 2002

davidmsc: if not, it was certainly lurking in my subconcious that way.
posted by eyeballkid at 8:16 PM on February 25, 2002

How the bloody hell did this twit get an intern position at the White House?

This may well be one of the questions -- apparently Monica and her handlers were aken aback at the negativity of some of the questions and reactions. I'm not sure why -- as superfli said, her claim to fame is being ejaculated on while committing adulterous acts with the last person on earth she could've ever imagined she could get away with having a clandestine affair with.

Call it lack of judgment, call it stupidity, call it immorality, call it all of the above; I still can't figure out how it makes one worthy of product endorsement deals, funding for her own line of wretchedly ugly handbags and now an HBO special.
posted by Dreama at 8:28 PM on February 25, 2002

The answer is easy, Dreama, these days fame is cheap. Used to be you'd have to do something heroic or create something beautiful or change the world to become famous.Now all you have do is something so shocking or ridiculous that the public can't help but pay attention, at least for a few minutes.Even the dismissals were giving Monica amount to a kind of antimatter equivalent of fame which will do in a pinch.
Miss Lewinsky is merely the culmination in a long line thatt began with the likes of Jim Jones and Patty Hearst(not uncoincidentally, the central characters in the earliest news stories I remember the grownups talking about as a kid).
Obviously, the Lewinsky incident and the people are worth discussing for what they reveal about our world in general, but turning Monica into an icon and treating her like someone possessing gravitas is definitely a bad idea and sends a twisted message to all of us about what our society values.
posted by jonmc at 9:01 PM on February 25, 2002

Monica in Blue with White Splotches.
posted by Dirjy at 9:29 PM on February 25, 2002

Oh I get it. I just saw on TV that her gag order is gone. She had signed something saying she couldn't speak about it in public for a certain time after the hearings. Now they think people will want to hear what they already know coming directly from the horse's mouth.

I don't care if she's beautiful or not. It's skin deep. I'm sure she's a nice person to get to know and all that, but she's indicative of a lot of people out there who will do anything for fame and power and money. Common sense dictates that it happens all the time. Clinton and Lewinsky just got caught. Why should this be glorified?
posted by ZachsMind at 9:37 PM on February 25, 2002

dreama: being ejaculated on while committing adulterous acts sounds so much better than the way i put it.

i put monica in the same class as kato kaelin. i was in las vegas and saw that fool and wanted to walk up to him and tell him how much of an idiot he really is and that being famous doesn't mean dick when you get famous the way he did. i just hate the way these sycophants kiss the "celebrities" asses. when i see monica at the "latest fashion show" w/other quasi-celebs it makes me want to puke.
posted by suprfli at 9:50 PM on February 25, 2002

i put monica in the same class as kato kaelin

Which president ejaculated on Kato? Would that have been Bush Sr?

Seriously, I agree with Dreama that Monica is not really worthy of any special attention, and I'm surprised anyone seriously cares anymore. That said, the public has a morbid fascination with the dirty sex lives of public figures because sex is interesting, especially dirty adulterous sex that is nothing like what most of them are having.
posted by daveadams at 10:03 PM on February 25, 2002

"How the bloody hell did this twit get an intern position at the White House?"

A father's love. And he was rewarded by getting to spend the rest of his life hearing his family name used as a euphemism for a blowjob. And the saddest thing is that he probably still loves her. And here she is, opening up old wounds again under the delusion she's going to get some respect by telling her side of the story. What a stunned bitch.
posted by BGM at 10:06 PM on February 25, 2002

I think it would be sadder if her father stopped loving her. She may be a pathetic excuse for an actiualised young woman in the 21st century, but she hasn't done anything worth depriving her of parental love.

In fact, I'd go so far as to suggest that if she'd had a little bit more love from her father she wouldn't have found it necessary to drop to her knees for a man old enough to be him.
posted by Dreama at 10:14 PM on February 25, 2002

Dreama, that's a bit too Freudian for my tastes. She didn't go down on Clinton because she didn't get enough love as a child. She did it so she could run the talk circuit and make a few hundred thousand dollars a year making public appearances as a wannabe. Has she posed nude in a circle jerk mag yet? I don't think this could get any sadder than it already is.
posted by ZachsMind at 10:53 PM on February 25, 2002

I think that she has nothing to be ashamed of, and I'm going to watch the documentary because I'm curious about what kind of attitude she takes. And because I think she's cute. So sue me.
posted by bingo at 10:56 PM on February 25, 2002

I agree with you dreama, because it would truly be a horrible thing if her father stopped loving her. Though, I feel that this whole ordeal of her regurgitated fame is absolutely more "numbification" of todays' mind: media conglomeration and coquettish decay of irrationality in societal stimulation...

It just really doesn't surprise me anymore what these people choose to participate in these days. Laws of Inevitability perhaps?...
Time might tell us something, eh?
posted by Kodel at 10:57 PM on February 25, 2002

absolutely...heh.
posted by Kodel at 10:59 PM on February 25, 2002

I never realized MeFi was so full of sanctimonious prudes about sex.

I'm always amazed at the things you can learn everyday.
posted by dglynn at 11:13 PM on February 25, 2002

This is evidence that we need a good sex scandal. When was the last good sex scandal? You had Monica, Amy Fisher, Kathy Willets (the one who's husband hid in the closet and videotaped her sexual escapades with South Florida's elite - my personal fave), the teacher who had the kid with her student. America, where has your fun sexual depravity gone?!!
posted by owillis at 11:14 PM on February 25, 2002

Yeah, if my life was fucked up and I had the opportunity to make some money by doing something that will hurt only a bunch of santimonious folks obsessed with hating idiotic celebrity obsession, I'd never do it. No way. I'd be concerned for them. Can't bemoaning stuff be fatal?
posted by Wood at 11:27 PM on February 25, 2002

I hear Monica's next gig will be on MTV's Jackass.
posted by nofundy at 5:20 AM on February 26, 2002

Well, she was hanging out with Tom Green on his MTV show.
posted by NortonDC at 8:27 AM on February 26, 2002

America, where has your fun sexual depravity gone?!!

Stileproject, Oliver, what a silly question. If you're a fan of the Amy Fisher scandal, I actually have a flimsy connection to a minor player in it. Send an e-mail and I'll tell ya all about it.
posted by jonmc at 8:30 AM on February 26, 2002

"How the bloody hell did this twit get an intern position at the White House?"

A father's love.

...as well as a father's hefty campaign contributions. Seriously, this is the angle of the story that has been completely ignored. As far as I can tell, Monica showed little inclination toward politics, apart from the obvious celebrity aspect, but her father used his DNC connections to get her a coveted WH intern spot, because it was easier than buying her a pony, I guess.

And he was rewarded by getting to spend the rest of his life hearing his family name used as a euphemism for a blowjob.

and a messy one at that.

She didn't go down on Clinton because she didn't get enough love as a child. She did it so she could run the talk circuit and make a few hundred thousand dollars a year making public appearances as a wannabe.

Probably a little of both of those things. But I really don't doubt that, at the time, she was naive enough to think that she could keep the affair secret, to be used as a favorite party story: "Monica, Monica! Tell that one about when you sucked off President... what was his name?"
posted by Ty Webb at 9:23 AM on February 26, 2002

I just saw a commercial where they showed Monica calling on the old adage, "until you walk a mile in my shoes..." I'm assuming she means that no one has the right to judge her for her actions and her amorality until after they've stood in the oval office and offered to go down on the president.

She walked that mile in her shoes. They were shoes she could have chosen not to fill. She could have walked away, but she didn't. She deserves everything she gets. I hope for her sake she's able to find the glass as half full.
posted by ZachsMind at 9:06 PM on February 27, 2002

I just saw the premiere, and I thought it was pretty good. Not surprisingly, Starr and Tripp came off looking much worse than Monica. I've always gotten a good vibe from her, not that I've ever seen her in person.
posted by bingo at 10:00 PM on March 3, 2002

Are you kidding, Bingo? Let's see, what did we get from Ms. Lewinsky tonight? She never once admitted that she was wrong in committing the criminal act she confessed to (and for which she was granted immunity from prosecution) -- she whined mightily about being "threatened" with 27 years in prison, but never once said "Gee, I shouldn't have submitted a false affadavit in lawsuit. That was wrong."

She continued to run interference for Clinton (saying that Starr et al set a 'perjury trap' for him by questioning her the day before he was due to give grand jury testimony) even while describing how the White House set her up as a brainless stalker bimbo.

She got all self-righteous when a guy asked her how if felt to be the blow job queen of America -- granted, the question was rude, but her answer was ludicrous. She said that all of the sexual innuendo and joking that was spread about her was terribly hurtful to her family, and that she wished people would think about them before they said stuff like that. It would've been nice to hear her say "And I should've thought about my mom, and dad, and little brother before I hit my knees, too, but I didn't, and that was my failure."

Overall, she never once admitted general culpability or said that if she'd simply decided not to take Clinton's invitation into the back room -- something that she knew was wrong when she did it, but did again, anyway, and again, until she was drawn in -- then no one would have ever heard of her. She'd be an anonymous, former White House intern like thousands before her. She blames Paula Jones, Ken Starr, the FBI agents who questioned her and especially Linda Tripp, but still seems completely unwilling to say "I was wrong."

She still clearly has a tremendous amount of growing up and owning up to do.
posted by Dreama at 10:32 PM on March 3, 2002

Hrm. Factually, everything you say is true, but I find that I see it more her way.
posted by bingo at 11:00 PM on March 3, 2002

That was some weird, weird TV.
posted by ColdChef at 4:49 AM on March 4, 2002