Did you ask for that raise? You totally deserve one.

August 3, 2015 10:01 AM

The Data Drive. "After twelve years spent relentlessly growing Facebook into one of the largest internet companies in the world, [Zuckerberg] unexpectedly fled the country in 2015, taking with him an industrial air-hangar's worth of hard-drives containing all of the information accumulated through his social network from its inception to the day of his mysterious departure."
posted by thecaddy (18 comments total)

That's what my Facebook page looks like!
posted by oceanjesse at 10:08 AM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Your friend MetaFilter has invited you to play Mafia Wars.

posted by Fizz at 10:10 AM on August 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

I want to get Gluhh'd! Also I'm worried about the Chipotle bot/human.

(this is awesome.)
posted by emjaybee at 10:16 AM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

There is a surprising amount of stuff in here. Did not expect the deep web. Wonder what happens if you call.
posted by chrominance at 10:26 AM on August 3, 2015

/leaves cube, heads for nearest Chipotle.
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 10:36 AM on August 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Chipotle Face?
posted by symbioid at 10:46 AM on August 3, 2015

Sunuva I've been had, haven't I? *raisesfistatchipotleviralmarketingscheme*

Or wait - maybe it's qdoba trying to make chipotle look bad? *raisesfistatqdobaantichipotleviralmarketingscheme*
posted by symbioid at 10:47 AM on August 3, 2015

They missed a golden opportunity with that 2nd Chipotle pop-up. "What you bean up to?"
posted by Devils Rancher at 10:48 AM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

an industrial air-hangar's worth of hard-drives containing all of the information accumulated through his social network

Not an expert but I reckon Facebook's servers would now take up more space than that. Didn't they buy some underground ex-cheese storage facility or something? For more efficient cooling?
posted by colie at 10:59 AM on August 3, 2015

This is.... fantastic.
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 11:32 AM on August 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Facebook has a neat blue-ray (*Edit: "BluRay") based cold storage facility for data backups (very interesting read). I had thought they were the standard in use there, but it seems:

Facebook is also moving a prototype cold storage array based on Blu-ray discs from a science project into production to augment the disk-based cold storage facilities, according to Taylor. Facebook divulged the Blu-ray archiving system at the Open Compute Summit in January 2014, and it is based on a 48U (that’s seven feet tall) rack that is capable of holding 1 PB of data in a single rack using 100 GB Blu-ray discs. You might be thinking that this is not so great, considering that Facebook can get 2 PB in a rack of cold storage using 4 TB drives, but the roadmap for Blu-ray is to push from 100 GB to 200 GB to 500 GB and eventually 1 TB discs, and importantly, the cost of a unit of capacity on a Blu-ray disk is a lot lower than it is on a disk drive.

“We are working to roll that into production, probably later this year in pretty large volume,” says Taylor. “And through 2016, we will have a large number of Blu-ray racks, and by large number I mean hundreds of petabytes rolling into production. It is a great technology with a pretty reasonable roadmap.”

posted by infinite intimation at 11:52 AM on August 3, 2015

That's what my Facebook page looks like!

Needs more poorly-made Tweety Bird image macros telling me that liberals are evil.
posted by Sangermaine at 11:55 AM on August 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

more poorly-made Tweety Bird image macros telling me that liberals are evil

Here you go
posted by exogenous at 1:00 PM on August 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

To be fair, I always knew that tweety was a Teahadist.
posted by dejah420 at 1:15 PM on August 3, 2015

I am getting all my nutrients from Jaromir's Sausage Enclosure from now on.
posted by languagehat at 1:54 PM on August 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Harvest life's data.
posted by schmod at 6:39 PM on August 3, 2015

The other day, somebody on the Blue commented, "This is all of the things!" and I was a little irritated that they weren't saying anything more substantial.

However, the linked website is, in my opinion, all of the things.
posted by radicalawyer at 7:45 AM on August 4, 2015

whoa that empty notifications box is freaking me out
posted by numaner at 7:03 PM on August 5, 2015