They want to murder you in a well
November 4, 2015 8:41 AM   Subscribe

In late December of 1895, the writer Stephen Crane—nervous, shabby, and all of twenty-three—attended the first annual dinner of the Society of the Philistines as its guest of honor. He little dreamed he was walking into one of history's first celebrity roasts.
posted by Iridic (8 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite
 
More like "The Dread Badge of Disparage" amirite?
posted by MCMikeNamara at 8:53 AM on November 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


"This kid has spunk, moxie, and probably a few other STDs"
posted by growabrain at 9:08 AM on November 4, 2015


Test as to whether this qualifies as a "celebrity roast": Was Don Rickles there? Y/N
posted by the sobsister at 9:29 AM on November 4, 2015


Sure, this guy got a dinner. But Adam, who said to our Lord in the Garden of Eden, "I got more ribs - you got more broads?" Never got a dinner! Joan Rivers, who said to Marcel Marceau, "Can we talk?" Never got a dinner! And Vincent Van Gogh, who said to the hat salesman, "I like it, but it keeps sliding over my ear." Never got a dinner!
posted by yhbc at 9:47 AM on November 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


I literally had this in my tabs waiting to post it.
posted by The Whelk at 10:33 AM on November 4, 2015


A man said to the universe:
“Sir, I exist!”
“However,” replied the universe,
“That is still a pretty terrible haircut.
I mean, would you like some pomade or something, I have some."
posted by thetortoise at 10:43 AM on November 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


Had no idea that these went back that far, but not surprised when I think of it.
Reminds me of a thing some friends and I did a few years back, it was a "Celebrity roast for Jesus"
that we did for his 2000th birthday. We did little short films that we ran between the live segments Cops segment ,Veggie tales segment and a candid interview with Joseph. Other gods and and Death were on the roast panel.
posted by boilermonster at 10:46 AM on November 4, 2015


I think I accidentally stumbled onto a meeting of the Society of the Philistines when I went to see Tree of Life in the theater.
posted by one_bean at 7:19 PM on November 4, 2015


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