#popebars

November 30, 2015 2:39 PM

"His palms were bloody, knees beat, cross was heavy, there's wine on his torso already" From BuzzFeed.
posted by Halloween Jack (28 comments total)

Well that explains why Drake started tithing.
posted by cmfletcher at 2:49 PM on November 30, 2015 [4 favorites]

Is "bars" some piece of hip-hop slang or is this effectively just funny because it is a random word paired with "pope"?
posted by Mars Saxman at 2:51 PM on November 30, 2015

Bars as in segments of music.
posted by kmz at 2:56 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]

My favorites were a series between Lin-Manuel Miranda and jonnysun and Megan Amram.
posted by kmz at 3:00 PM on November 30, 2015 [11 favorites]

P Fancy
posted by Kabanos at 3:01 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]

"His palms were bloody, knees beat, cross was heavy, there's wine on his torso already"

Wouldn't this mean the Pope was rap battling Jesus?
posted by Horace Rumpole at 3:03 PM on November 30, 2015 [4 favorites]

Ohhhh this reminds me of the vatican rag. Pure gold.
posted by prefpara at 3:08 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]

I await the performance by P Franc, feat. P J. P. the Deuce.
posted by JoeXIII007 at 3:17 PM on November 30, 2015

Google isn't finding it, but in the very early days of mefi this conceptually was a meme almost exactly. All i remember is a bunch of edits of Handel's Messiah and some "rollin 24 inches off the ground like je-sus" sample getting overused at worse and worse quality.

The original most popular one was a flash thing. It was as old as, if not older than this. And yes, the pope was central to it.

Does anyone remember what i'm talking about? This was like a newgrounds thing, probably.
posted by emptythought at 3:32 PM on November 30, 2015

Despite what you read in my Laudato Si', i'm still into homophobia and misogyny
posted by naju at 3:40 PM on November 30, 2015 [3 favorites]

Droppin' encyclicals like Galileo dropped his affirmation of Copernicanism after we threatened him with excommunication the orange.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 3:49 PM on November 30, 2015 [12 favorites]

Psalm Pspaghetti; side project name claimed.
posted by delfin at 4:28 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]

Ta-Nehisi Coates has been on this all day:

Francis, M to Iz-H, phenomenal. Scripture rest under the vest, by the abdominal...
posted by ryanshepard at 4:29 PM on November 30, 2015 [4 favorites]

Spotlight totally killed the Pope Funky Frank buzz I'd been building the past couple of years.
posted by sallybrown at 4:39 PM on November 30, 2015

And all you other cats takin' shots, I'll hit you, you only get half a bar: peace be with you.
posted by box at 5:00 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]

I be the chalice lifter, the real good gifter, child educator, transubstantiator.
posted by box at 5:10 PM on November 30, 2015 [11 favorites]

Get your ass back behind me Satan
Been elected to confront your hating
I'm just getting started I'm accelerating
Spitting so fast I'm expectorating
While still maintaining my e-nunc-i-a-ting
Just like an angel, I'm Annunciating
The Good News
From the Good Book
And you'll get more after this hook:

Inter oves locum praesta
Et ab haedis me sequestra
Statuens in parte dextra
posted by Your Disapproving Father at 5:31 PM on November 30, 2015 [11 favorites]

Lorem / ipsum / dolor sit amet, consectetur / adipiscing elit!
posted by Potomac Avenue at 5:39 PM on November 30, 2015 [5 favorites]

You don't even gotta bring your papal out / pope boys of the year / drinks is on the house.
posted by gauche at 7:41 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]

Is "bars" some piece of hip-hop slang

Yes. As already noted, it's derived from the (non-slang) musical term "bar", which is a portion of a song consisting of several measures (which in turn consist of several beats). "Spitting bars" is just a flashy way of saying "rapping".

Explaining slang is almost as awkward as explaining jokes.
posted by escape from the potato planet at 8:15 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]

No more gold bling, I'm-a bring, a humbler thing,
Tear this Godforsaken hat off, like Frodo's ring,
I was prayin' in the beginning, in Argentin'
While they dissin' Franciscans, I felt the sting...
posted by Navelgazer at 9:11 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]

I got Mary on my lock screen, call that Virgin mobile
Get those alms for the poor, you know that shit is noble
posted by a halcyon day at 9:21 PM on November 30, 2015 [13 favorites]

I'm the Pontiff you want if you seekin' salvation,
Holy Spirit'll haunt if you want consecration,
Straight off the dome like Basilica blazin',
The word of the Lord and I ain't paraphrazin'
posted by Reyturner at 11:52 PM on November 30, 2015 [4 favorites]

I misread Popebars as Popebears and was a little disappointed not to find bears dressed as the Pope.
posted by Kris10_b at 2:53 AM on December 1, 2015

"Everyday Apostlin'" OK there is some gold here
posted by effugas at 3:19 AM on December 1, 2015 [6 favorites]

World leaders give me grief for ridin a Fiat
But I got the keys to heaven. What keys do they got?
posted by ardgedee at 3:54 AM on December 1, 2015 [4 favorites]

I misread Popebars as Popebears and was a little disappointed not to find bears dressed as the Pope.

Ask and ye shall receive.
posted by Halloween Jack at 6:31 AM on December 1, 2015

Jesus of Nazareth
I need no resurrection
You nail me up I get the FUCK back down again

goddamn hamilton won't get out of my damn head
posted by stet at 3:04 PM on December 1, 2015