If I have to sacrifice my family, it must be better than a Klondike bar

December 3, 2015 10:23 AM

Atlas Obscura asks Americans what they thought Turkish Delight was when they first read The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.
posted by jacquilynne (237 comments total)

hmm I'd had Indian desserts as a child so was familiar with the texture and rosewater flavor of Turkish Delight.
posted by sweetkid at 10:27 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Like saltwater taffy, but meat-flavored.
posted by theodolite at 10:30 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

I was familiar with it because I grew up in an Indian household and it would usually make an appearance around the holidays. But I've never been a fan of it at all. It's consistency is just gross.
posted by Fizz at 10:31 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

The closest I have ever come to divorcing my husband was when he tricked me into trying that Canadian horror candy bar that is Big Turk. What a nightmarish confectionery that is.
posted by Kitteh at 10:31 AM on December 3, 2015 [18 favorites]

Something red and covered in chocolate. A cherry cordial, basically, but somehow also tasting like meat. I think I was eight when I read TLTWaTW.
posted by Mogur at 10:32 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

I remember being confounded by what Yorkshire pudding could possibly be though, though I think that's just generic English food related, not Narnia.
posted by sweetkid at 10:33 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

MetaFilter: somehow also tasting like meat.
posted by Fizz at 10:35 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

I grew up in the US and when I had turkish delight growing up a few times. I always really enjoyed it! I'm not positive why people didn't, it was different but certainly not bad by any means.
posted by Carillon at 10:35 AM on December 3, 2015

When I first read The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe, my dad bought me some Turkish delight, because they sell it at the St. Lawrence Market, and because he's cool like that.


I was not impressed.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 10:35 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I never read the book but I saw a TV cartoon when I was a kid and I always pictured it being basically a Three Musketeers.
posted by bondcliff at 10:35 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

The closest I have ever come to divorcing my husband was when he tricked me into trying that Canadian horror candy bar that is Big Turk. What a nightmarish confectionery that is.

When I first moved from Texas to Canada, a so called friend did the same thing to me. I don't think we're friends any more. Not solely as a result of my trying the 'Big Turk' bar. But it certainly didn't help. Fuck that shit.
posted by Fizz at 10:37 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

I assumed it was ribbon candy.
posted by bdc34 at 10:37 AM on December 3, 2015

Ha! I can still remember the look on my kid's face when she tried it the first time-- so so excited specifically because of the Narnia books. It was the closest a 7 year old could convey "What is this bullshit?"
posted by gwint at 10:38 AM on December 3, 2015 [36 favorites]

One of my main pleasures when I went to Istanbul where the mountains of Turkish Delight in the Egyptian Bazaar. Even though I was 21 at the time, I too would have betrayed my family right then and there.
posted by signal at 10:38 AM on December 3, 2015 [10 favorites]

Many English readers would probably have pictured Fry's Turkish Delight, which is quite different from the authentic stuff. Certainly a (retrospectively quite nasty) fixture of my childhood and, at least, easier to eat without ending up looking like you're a clumsy coke baron.
posted by sobarel at 10:39 AM on December 3, 2015 [14 favorites]

For some reason, I always pictured these Christmas candies.
posted by Rock Steady at 10:41 AM on December 3, 2015

At some point during childhood I learned the connection between Turkish Delight and Aplets & Cotlets. I understood Edmund's betrayal, I could eat a whole box of those.
posted by Mister Cheese at 10:41 AM on December 3, 2015 [13 favorites]

My fifth grade teacher told us that it was the most glorious toffee-caramel you could imagine.

Thanks a lot, Mrs. Ryder.
posted by corey flood at 10:43 AM on December 3, 2015 [9 favorites]

I think I was a grown man, physically in Istanbul, before it ever occurred to me that they were a real thing.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 10:43 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Huh. This is good. I definitely had very vague negative associations with turkish delight when I was younger and I still can't really define them. I know that I saw something with what looked like nuts in it, and I generally hate nuts - no hard things in soft things is my lifelong rule. It was also pastel-colored and coated in something powdery which maybe reminded me of the profoundly disgusting circus peanuts. Also, nougat is a good description. Nougat is one of those things that I've maybe had once or twice and decided I don't like and now has been solidified in my mind as a Food That I Hate For Unknown Reasons. Like so many other foods I read about in books but rarely if ever encountered, it seemed so magical that it always held a place in my imagination (see also: all foods in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, milk poured over bread with sugar from The Boxcar Children, porridge from Winnie-the-Pooh and homemade applesauce from the Beezus and Ramona books).

BUT, I visited Turkey like five years ago and had some real, fresh turkish delight and now I realize what all the fuss is about. Chewy, soft and sweet, it tastes like gumdrops! Very delightful.
posted by triggerfinger at 10:43 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

Best enjoyed on a moonlit night.
posted by prize bull octorok at 10:44 AM on December 3, 2015 [12 favorites]

Man, this thread has me now thinking about the BBC adaptation with the animatronic Aslan. So many memories of watching that on Saturdays mornings as a child on PBS.
posted by Fizz at 10:44 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

I visualized Turkish Delight as being a beautiful rich turquoise color (I knew that Turkey was a place, but the color association was too powerful to resist - I'd think about how it probably wasn't actually turquoise sometimes but couldn't shake the image) and it was sort of like glazed caramel corn because that was light as it was described in the book, but blue and tastier and not-caramel. I think this had to do with the fact that it came in a tin, and we used to get tins of caramel corn for Christmas occasionally.

I too was disappointed the first time I had Turkish Delight, but then I realized that I'd gotten really bad Turkish Delight. I've had some pretty good versions.
posted by Frowner at 10:45 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

The closest I have ever come to divorcing my husband was when he tricked me into trying that Canadian horror candy bar that is Big Turk. What a nightmarish confectionery that is.

Big Turk! I was about to chime in with that. THat's what I pictured him eating in the book although I didn't actually read LW&W until I had kids of my own. I dunno, Big Turk isn't terrible but it wasn't my normal go-to candy bar. It's OK though if you're in the mood for chocolate-coated jelly. Which happens like once every 5 years.
posted by GuyZero at 10:47 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

I also assumed it was a form of divinity, which I was mildly obsessed with as a child.
posted by daisystomper at 10:47 AM on December 3, 2015 [12 favorites]

For some reason I thought it was something like rocky road with caramel or toffee, drizzled in syrup or treacle, savory but sweet and chocolatety.

I never actually saw the stuff until I was dating a British ex-pat while in my early twenties when she took me to a 7-11 that had a section of imported British snacks and teas, you know, timbits and PG tips and such, and there it was on the shelf next to the Aero bars and other weird British candy, kind of hidden away and a bit dusty.

"Oh god, its horrible. You don't actually want that." She warned me, but I didn't listen. Finally I got to try some of this amazing stuff that was so good that Edmund sold everyone out just for a tin of it. So I bought it and tried it.

It was horrible, like weird perfumey jello left to molder in the armpits of a yak for a year, then dredged in Satan's ass dandruff. It was like a cruel trick, shattering the fantasy I'd harbored for years like so much hard toffee under a hobnailed boot on a dirty floor.

I also remember thinking even less of Edmund's taste, sanity and humanity immediately after eating it, thinking something like "well, you are a really sick, masochistic fucker, aren't you, selling out everyone for this? Really? You couldn't have held out for some Jaffa cakes?"
posted by loquacious at 10:48 AM on December 3, 2015 [26 favorites]

if you're in the mood for chocolate-coated jelly

Gah you've made it sound worse
posted by Kitteh at 10:49 AM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]

Something changed recently at Atlas Obscura, because while they're blog was always interesting, lately they've been putting out some really great articles. Anyone know what happened?
posted by jessssse at 10:50 AM on December 3, 2015

I have had this very discussion with many of my friends. I think the most defining rite of passage for an American bookworm of a certain age (that is, before the Internet made it easy to Google anything you'd like) was to fantasize about Turkish Delight until you were able to try it yourself, likely several years after you'd read the books and had passed into adulthood, and to have your childhood dreams shattered by the disappointing banality of the real thing. Honestly, this is one of the most American things I know.
posted by Yoko Ono's Advice Column at 10:51 AM on December 3, 2015 [34 favorites]

(I happen to love Turkish Delight, but I'm the only one I know who does, so I don't think I take away from the universality of this experience.)
posted by Yoko Ono's Advice Column at 10:52 AM on December 3, 2015 [6 favorites]

To me, the rose flavored Turkish Delight has a similar texture and taste to the Botan rice candy I used to have as a child. When I tried Turkish Delight for the first time as an adult, it was a very Proustian experience.
posted by cazoo at 10:52 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

I always pictured those weird jelly nougat candies. I never actually tried those things, but they looked weird and unappealing, which were somehow to my mind appropriate for Edmund to obsess over (the little traitorous stinker).
posted by fimbulvetr at 10:52 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

I just thought it was... turkey. Like REALLY good, tender, thick slices of turkey meat. If it's actually stated in the book to be a kind of dessert, well... I guess I was just really into my meat fantasy as a child.
posted by jinjo at 10:53 AM on December 3, 2015 [13 favorites]

I always just figured it was a type of blowjob.
posted by egypturnash at 10:55 AM on December 3, 2015 [47 favorites]

I'm with jinjo - I thought it was turkey in gravy. So comforting on a sleigh in an eternal winter!
posted by moonmilk at 10:55 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

And now I am thinking about other literary confections that we imagine in different ways as readers.

I'm thinking of the 'spice' from Frank Herbert's Dune universe. And I always pictured it as a kind of brown peppery-cinnamon that Fremen would place under their lips like chew tobacco.
posted by Fizz at 10:55 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

Man, this thread has me now thinking about the BBC adaptation with the animatronic Aslan.

You actually see the Turkish Delight in that adaptation, so I never had to wonder what it looked like. For some reason I thought it would taste sweet and brown—think maple syrup, molasses, horehound.
posted by Iridic at 10:56 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

no hard things in soft things is my lifelong rule.

my brain's "that's what she said" autoresponse collided with my face's raised eyebrow autoresponse and now my whole head's a mess. so.
posted by palomar at 10:56 AM on December 3, 2015 [38 favorites]

The odd thing about the Big Turk bar is that people must buy it, because they keep making it. Like I can go down to the corner store right now and buy a Big Turk. I wouldn't though, because they're awful. Who is buying these?
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 10:57 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

The closest I have ever come to divorcing my husband was when he tricked me into trying that Canadian horror candy bar that is Big Turk. What a nightmarish confectionery that is.

I have still not convinced her to try Thrills gum, for those keeping score.
posted by Shepherd at 10:58 AM on December 3, 2015 [14 favorites]

Remember that LW&W was written in the late-'40s, so we're really dealing with effects of a more than two-decade period of inter-war austerity and wartime rationing on the taste experiences of a child.

I bet the queen could have probably served Edmund, like, a fresh lemon or something, and he still would have been super impressed.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 10:59 AM on December 3, 2015 [33 favorites]

Yeah, well, when your proud tagline is "Still tastes like soap!", that's a hard sell right there.
posted by Kitteh at 10:59 AM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

I actually asked, and my parents explained it, and then we made my grandma's recipe, which my dad loves but which we never made because from scratch, it's kind of a hassle (in part because you have to work out a substitute for those gelatin sheets you used to have to pre-soak.)

I was really disappointed, but my parents explained that children didn't have modern candy in those days and what they did have, they almost never got to eat, so things like a fresh orange at Christmas, or sugar plums (which are just prunes with sometimes some candying on the outside) or almond-flavored, sugar-powdered gelatin cubes were a BIG BIG SPECIAL TREAT. I always felt sorry for the children of olden times.
posted by blnkfrnk at 11:00 AM on December 3, 2015 [16 favorites]

Who is buying these?

People who eat Necco wafers.
posted by zippy at 11:00 AM on December 3, 2015 [15 favorites]

I'm loving the comments and responses to this subject. I think I'll just stay in this thread the rest of the day and not the one about gun violence in America.
posted by Fizz at 11:00 AM on December 3, 2015 [17 favorites]

outside of countries where Turkish Delight is a ubiquitous treat, many people first encounter it via The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, the first installment of C.S. Lewis' beloved Narnia books

I detect several invalid assumptions here.

I will tell you this: I delight in Turkish Delight a lot more than I belove The Lion, The Witch, and the Oxford Comma.


"May I see your passport, please. . . ."
posted by Herodios at 11:01 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I was the type of kid nerd that actually looked up "Turkish Delight" when I read about it in the Narnia books. I'm of asian ancestry, and when I read the description, it sounded a lot like certain jelly-like asian candies I've eaten. So, not so strange to me. But, no, I wouldn't sell out my siblings for any candy!
posted by King Sky Prawn at 11:01 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I thought it was a cross between divinity and almond cookies dusted with sugar.
posted by immlass at 11:02 AM on December 3, 2015

Wait, is Big Turk a candy bar version of Ring Jells? And if so can you please send me like eleventy cases?
posted by uncleozzy at 11:02 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

But, no, I wouldn't sell out my siblings for any candy!

I probably would for a decent grilled cheese sandwich. But I'm a bit of an asshole. I didn't like my little sister growing up. As an adult, I consider her one of my best friends, but back then. A sandwich, yes, I'd make this deal.
posted by Fizz at 11:02 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

But, no, I wouldn't sell out my siblings for any candy!


Eh- for me, it would probably depend on the day, the candy, and the sibling.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 11:04 AM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]

I always thought it was some kind of fluffy soft turrón that was still somehow flaky like baklava. I suppose due to growing up with a Cuban family and Egyptian friends, those were the two closest nutty and exotic-seeming desserts I could compare it to.
posted by oh.ghoulin at 11:04 AM on December 3, 2015

My kids love love Thrills gum, circus peanuts, black licorice, Necco wafers, and other weird candies. They even like bring circus peanuts camping to roast them over the campfire like marshmallows (Don't even try it. Trust me on this one).

Even they won't eat Turkish Delight.
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:06 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

Wait, is Big Turk a candy bar version of Ring Jells? And if so can you please send me like eleventy cases?

See, now that seems weird. Who looked at Big Turk and said "This would be better if it was annular"? Anyway, just walk into any Mac's and they Big Turk will be.
posted by GuyZero at 11:06 AM on December 3, 2015

Did not read the book as a kid, but would have thought Turkish Delight was Turkish Taffee, a candy bar around in the 50s that came in chocolate, vanilla, banana, and strawberry and tended to pull teeth out. I thought it was pretty good, but not the best candy at all, being partial to Hershey's Crunch bars

Having read the description of what Turkish Delight actually is, I did have that somewhere as a kid, somebody's grandma's house maybe, and did not like it.
posted by mermayd at 11:07 AM on December 3, 2015

I assumed it was some kind of exotic toffee...I think the book says it made his face sticky, and toffee or caramel was what that reminded me of. I also assumed it was brown. Not being big on toffee, I didn't think much of his choices; it would take some kind of chocolate, at least, to get me to sell out my siblings.
posted by emjaybee at 11:08 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Ha! I thought it was a See's Scotchmallow. I remember this with perfect clarity. I don't think I've ever had actual Turkish Delight.
posted by sunset in snow country at 11:08 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

The real betrayal for me wasn't Turkish delight, it was ginger beer. In the Magician's Nephew, the kids spend all their leisure time up in an attic drinking ginger beer (and I realize now, also, that I pictured this attic as consisting solely of rafters they perches upon, with no floor at all.) I assumed ginger beer was exactly the same thing as ginger ale.

Flash forward: I'm in London on my honeymoon. We're in a tube station, and we see actual straight-up Old Jamaica ginger beer for sale. I am filled with childlike wonder and delight, and purchase a can.

The delight dissolves on the first sip. Ginger beer is NOT LIKE GINGER ALE OMG. It is much, much, much spicier, and much less sweet, and in fact it is probably the rough equivalent to getting a mouth full of Tabasco sauce when you were expecting good ol' ketchup. It was a sad day for me, my friends. A sad day.
posted by Andrhia at 11:08 AM on December 3, 2015 [13 favorites]

I feel like someone (erroneously) told me - though it's possible they accurately described it and this is just the mental image I got - that it was like these powdered sugar covered jelly mint things, but with honey inside.

It didn't sound great, but I liked the mint ones so I was willing to try it, if given the chance.
posted by Mchelly at 11:09 AM on December 3, 2015

Wait, is Big Turk a candy bar version of Ring Jells? And if so can you please send me like eleventy cases?

Do you mean Joyva Joys?
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:11 AM on December 3, 2015

I completely hate the consistency of things like Turkish Delight but I understand why people like certain things that others might absolutely hate. It's how I feel about the drink Moxie, for which I am completely mocked on a routine basis. I have a friend in New Hampshire who brings me two or three cases every few years and then I ration them out like some kind of drug user on a limited supply fix. I get why people hate the taste but something about the slightly metallic aftertaste is appealing to me.
posted by Fizz at 11:11 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

I thought of it as something like the gooey pastry/sugar/cinnamon mass at the center of a Cinnamon Roll.
posted by ethansr at 11:12 AM on December 3, 2015

Do you mean Joyva Joys?

Whoa. I have literally never seen it except as rings in the big pink box around Jewish holidays. Mind blown.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:13 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

A properly aged Big Turk has nearly perfect bite resistance. The trick, however, is to get one that's suitably aged. Fresh is inadequate.
posted by aramaic at 11:13 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

I love that completely unnecessary and silly drawing of "upset Mallory Ortberg" that Matt Lubchansky threw in.
posted by almostmanda at 11:15 AM on December 3, 2015 [11 favorites]

I can feel cavities forming just reading this thread though.
posted by sweetkid at 11:15 AM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

The closest I have ever come to divorcing my husband was when he tricked me into trying that Canadian horror candy bar that is Big Turk. What a nightmarish confectionery that is.

Rumor has it they only made one batch and stores have been selling it ever since. Because why would anyone make a second batch?
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 11:15 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

I love that completely unnecessary and silly drawing of "upset Mallory Ortberg" that Matt Lubchansky threw in.

Technically it was not unnecessary, I told both of them that I was going to make Matt draw it just so I could see his interpretation of "disappointment." (Though I didn't really expect "disappointed Mallory" specifically.)
posted by babelfish at 11:17 AM on December 3, 2015 [14 favorites]

The trick with eating Big Turks is to make sure you get a fresh one. You have to squeeze them before buying them because when they're old they get hard. And then (somehow) they stick in your teeth and are really unpleasant. The taste is also less than optimal when they're not fresh. Admittedly, they're not the best chocolate in the world, but sometimes the combination of flavours and textures really hits the spot.
posted by sardonyx at 11:18 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

that Canadian horror candy bar that is Big Turk. What a nightmarish confectionery that is.

I love Big Turk. It's basically a chocolate covered bar of swedish berry and it is you all who are wrong
posted by Hoopo at 11:20 AM on December 3, 2015 [11 favorites]

It was supposed to have chocolate in it. I might have confused it with the chocolate turtles I remember eating once.
posted by steady-state strawberry at 11:21 AM on December 3, 2015

Dammit. Now I'm going to end up buying a Big Turk at the corner store on my way home today.
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:21 AM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

Rumor has it they only made one batch and stores have been selling it ever since. Because why would anyone make a second batch?

I think you're talking about the Scotch mints at my Aunt's house. She seems to have a never ending supply. Fuck Scotch mints.
posted by Fizz at 11:22 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

All English writers are skilled at making terrible food sound unbelievably scrumptious. Roald Dahl, Brian Jacques, C. S. Lewis, the lot. The English are taught to do this from a very early age. It makes sense, if you consider English cuisine.
posted by duffell at 11:23 AM on December 3, 2015 [42 favorites]

I always wanted to have berries and milk for dinner like Peter Rabbit but could not get my mother on board for this idea.
posted by sweetkid at 11:24 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

Rumor has it they only made one batch and stores have been selling it ever since. Because why would anyone make a second batch?

No, that was Mackintosh Toffee. They made 4 millions tonnes of it in 1932 and have been working their way through the backlog ever since.
posted by GuyZero at 11:25 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

I don't remember what I thought it was when I was a kid, but given that I still don't know what it is (before reading this article) the first thing that came to my head was that it would be a baklava-like dessert. Wrong apparently...

Also, speaking of other American misunderstandings, am I the only American child who was baffled by the mention of "marks" in Voyage of the Dawn Treader? It's mentioned at the very beginning that Eustace carries a notebook around with him, in which he writes his marks -- now that I know what it means his characterization as sort of a boor makes more sense. When I first read it I thought the notebook was literally filled with pencil markings and I was so confused.

I was also confused by what "riverbanks" were when I was a child, but that's because I grew up in the Los Angeles area...
posted by andrewesque at 11:27 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

Oddly, what I imagined Turkish Delight as being turned out to be pretty close to the actual case. Also, I quite liked it when I tried it. Also ginger beer.

There was, however, a period after I learned what some of the foods children went into raptures over in British children's books were actually like, such as sugar plums and figgy pudding, when I imagined Britain must be some land of terrible deprivation and woe.

(I live there now. Normal human desserts and candy are readily available, and the chocolate is in fact quite good. It is a bit wet, though.)
posted by kyrademon at 11:28 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

Just found out that the creators of Applets and Cotlets are Turkish, which makes a lot of sense.
posted by Artw at 11:28 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

No, that was Mackintosh Toffee

Truth indeed. Certainly one of the surest ways to remove teeth is to bite into one of those accursed things. I had many a well-meaning great-aunt who would buy those for us when we were kids. They seemed to be one of the greatest injustices and affronts to candy in the world.
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:29 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

There was, however, a period after I learned what some of the foods children went into raptures over in British children's books were actually like, such as sugar plums and figgy pudding, that I imagined Britain must be some land of terrible deprivation and woe.

Wait until you experience the full armour plated horror of a British "Christmas Cake".
posted by Artw at 11:29 AM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]

I remember Harriet the Spy's aunt or nanny or something was described as wearing "yards of tweed" which I could not get my head around but again, as the American born child of Indian parents, I assumed she was wearing a tweed sari, although it still doesn't make sense and even now I imagine it was a suit of some sort.
posted by sweetkid at 11:30 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

And, yeah, as a very young kid reading the books I probably didn't get the austerity or the intense role of food in general in context in the books.

I have had good Turkish delight. It's still a bit like eating a bar of soap.
posted by loquacious at 11:32 AM on December 3, 2015

I thought of it as a sort of vanilla nougat, maybe with nuts. Now, of course, I associate it with this song.
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:32 AM on December 3, 2015

For those who aren't Pynchon fans and are never going to make it through Gravity's Rainbow -- you should nevertheless read this short scene, which perfectly sums up the reaction many Americans have to the more esoteric types of British sweets..
posted by Nerd of the North at 11:32 AM on December 3, 2015 [16 favorites]

I pictured it as being sweet and crumbly, not chewy. Sort of like peanut brittle. Real Turkish Delight when you get it fresh in Istanbul is actually delightful (though I'm not a fan of the rose water flavor). The stuff that gets imported here is usually stale and dried out by the time one gets it.
posted by Daily Alice at 11:32 AM on December 3, 2015

a tweed sari

what an amazing mental image
posted by andrewesque at 11:33 AM on December 3, 2015 [10 favorites]

People who eat Necco wafers.

I actually like ::mumble mumble::

I'll just show myself out then
posted by holborne at 11:34 AM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]

No, that was Mackintosh Toffee

Aw man, you guys are making me feel like the weirdo here. I like Big Turk, Mackintosh Toffee, and Eat-More bars. Those are my go-tos if I'm going to get a candy bar. Which is not often these days. But those are the interesting ones, that have flavors other than "fuckton of sugar"
posted by Hoopo at 11:34 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

I imagined something airy and amazing like cotton candy, which I thought was ambrosia at that time in my life. I assumed it tasted like chocolate, too.

It was a delightful surprise, decades later, to encounter actual Turkish Delight in the Pike Place Market in Seattle and find out it was actually wonderful. Though I have to say what's available here doesn't hold a candle to the truly incredible Turkish Delight we sampled in Istanbul about 5 years ago.
posted by bearwife at 11:34 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

a tweed sari

what an amazing mental image

right? also a logical conclusion after hearing something described as "yards of tweed"
posted by sweetkid at 11:37 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

Some aspects of British cuisine are indeed troubling, but they invented chocolate Hobnobs, so they're all right by me.
posted by A dead Quaker at 11:37 AM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

...what they thought Turkish Delight was...

$5, same as in town.
posted by Thorzdad at 11:37 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

Another Aplets & Cotlets person here. I think they used to just be a West Coast U.S thing.
posted by benito.strauss at 11:38 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I have much better things to do, but here's that bit from Harriet the Spy:

"Hey, where are you going?" asked Harriet, jumping up.
Because Ole Golly had on her outdoor things. Ole Golly
just had indoor things and outdoor things. She never wore
anything as recognisable as a skirt, a jacket, or a sweater.
She just had yards and yards of tweed which enveloped her
like a lot of discarded blankets, -which ballooned out when
she walked, and -which she referred to as her Things.

ok derail over.
posted by sweetkid at 11:39 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

My mother told me that it was a jelly candy and that the nearest thing that I was familiar with was probably Chuckles.
posted by cleroy at 11:41 AM on December 3, 2015

Yeah, I gotta defend Mackintosh Toffee as well. Freeze one of them for a day, then whack it against a table (uh, still in the wrapper), and you get these toffee shards that you can slowly enjoy as they soften for an hour, or chomp to remove any loose fillings.
posted by GhostintheMachine at 11:41 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

It was a sad day for me, my friends. A sad day.

For me, revelatory. Proper Ginger Beer is the best thing ever, especially with a good bourbon in it.
posted by bonehead at 11:42 AM on December 3, 2015 [14 favorites]

Yeah, we're Armenian so we ate a lot of Aplets and Cotlets and homemade lokhoum as special treats when I was a kid. I asked my mom what Turkish Delight was and she said, "It's like Aplets and Cotlets or lokhoum, that kind of gummy stuff," and I remember thinking if I was going to sacrifice my family I'd insist on at least a little chocolate.
posted by town of cats at 11:43 AM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

One of my main pleasures when I went to Istanbul where the mountains of Turkish Delight in the Egyptian Bazaar. Even though I was 21 at the time, I too would have betrayed my family right then and there.

On the other hand, I'm another person who had no idea what Turkish Delight was, imagined it as perhaps my most favorite chocolate out of an assorted Whitman's Sampler, or whatever, and had my first Turkish Delight on a trip to Turkey at age 30 and was completely crushed with disappointment. Maybe it was just bad Turkish Delight, but it was basically everything I hate in a candy, rolled into one.

It absolutely confirmed for me that Edmund was a jackass.
posted by TwoStride at 11:45 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Yeah, I think I imagined Turkish Delight as being sort of like the candy version of baklava-- something light and crumbly and sugary that dissolves in your mouth. The real thing was disappointing. Though I guess not THAT disappointing, since I just finished putting in a Narnia-themed Christmas window at work.
posted by nonasuch at 11:47 AM on December 3, 2015 [9 favorites]

I do want to complain about the weirdness of calling hard candy "boiled sweets" and cookies "biscuits" -- I could never understand why British people were interested in terrible sounding things like ginger and chocolate biscuits -- and referring to ALL dessert as pudding, and both the name and concept of spotted dick. Why can't people from the UK, who are otherwise so articulate, verbalize the joys of sweet treats?
posted by bearwife at 11:48 AM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

i just realized i never read this hamfisted christian allegory in its entirety and i feel vindicated in knowing there was a rubbish sweet involved
posted by poffin boffin at 11:54 AM on December 3, 2015 [16 favorites]

Some aspects of British cuisine are indeed troubling

For example, the English Breakfast

baked beans? grilled tomatoes? for breakfast? /shudders
posted by Existential Dread at 11:55 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I am one of those Turkish Delight-loving outliers. Only the rose flavour will do! For a short, but glorious, period I worked near a Turkish restaurant and would buy it fresh by the bagful. This is all to say that I will eat your share of the Turkish Delight.
posted by atropos at 11:55 AM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

Growing up in Toronto, I went on quite the journey with Turkish Delights.

It wasn't until after I read the books that I first decided to spend my allowance money on the prepackaged Cadbury version (which I think was just called "Turkish Delight" back then, but now is apparently "Big Turk"), and I was horrified, to say the least.

Then, for some reason, someone brought a sample of a more authentic sort into my presence. Maybe one of my parent's friends dropped some off for Christmas? Maybe someone brought some to school? But it was basically stiffer jell-o, in "standard" north american flavors (I remember orange, and "red" which might have been strawberry, but could have been fruit punch), and coated in powdered sugar. Still not sell-my-sisters-for-it good, but I could see where Edmund was coming from.

It wasn't until university I think until someone brought some of the rosewater-and-other-primarily-soap-flavours stuff to a potluck or something, and I realized that Turkish Delight contains multitudes (and at least I was mature enough to realize that the reason I didn't like it was that I wasn't used to experiencing those flavours as food).

If that witch wanted something out of me now, she'd have to hook me up with a source for Mr. Big bars on this side of the border.
posted by sparklemotion at 11:55 AM on December 3, 2015

It is not that Mackintosh Toffee Bars didn't taste good. They were just impossible to eat. Little bricks of tooth-breaking candy, oh so tempting but so completely unaccessible without a ridiculous amount of work and jaw pain. Not worth the effort.
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:56 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Speaking of Harriet the Spy, egg creams are another one of those "read about it, get confused when see the real thing." Because, you know, you'd expect them to have eggs and cream in it, but nope.

(As someone who grew up in the NYC area with a father who grew up in Brooklyn with a steady supply of both Fox's U-Bet syrup and seltzer water in the house, I was of course, in the know, but plenty of my friends weren't.)
posted by damayanti at 11:56 AM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]

baked beans? grilled tomatoes? for breakfast? /shudders

many sins can be forgiven when one has a fried slice clenched in one's greasy fist
posted by poffin boffin at 11:57 AM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

Wow, I never stopped to consider other kids imagined this sweet, and were then terribly disappointed by the reality. Though of course it's obvious we would have all had this collective delusion.

I imagined it must be melt in the mouth delicate, and tasted like chocolate and toffee and milky. But also sliced thin like deli turkey somehow. And maybe weirdly meaty? I don't know. I just knew it was rare and precious, for him to betray his family like that.

I also spent way too much time imagining the foods described in the Little House on the Prairie series. Especially the maple candy made in snow.
posted by Windigo at 11:58 AM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]

terrible sounding things like ginger and chocolate biscuits

Well for one thing it's because ginger and chocolate are two great tastes that go great together, and Americans use the word "biscuit" RONG, and also "pudding" has more meanings in English than it does in American or whatever you call that language where words like "nite" exist and you hate the letter "u" for some reason.
posted by Hoopo at 11:58 AM on December 3, 2015 [11 favorites]

My father-in-law, several years later, is still mad that he had to explain to the teenager at the ice cream shop how to make an egg cream.

Goddamn I love egg creams. Which reminds me, I think we're almost out of U-Bet at home.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:59 AM on December 3, 2015

but they invented chocolate Hobnobs, so they're all right by me.

Until they cancelled out all the goodwill by inventing jaffa cakes.
posted by triggerfinger at 11:59 AM on December 3, 2015

you hate the letter "u" for some reason

THERE IS NO U IN TEAM
posted by moonmilk at 12:01 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

I expected it to be like Divinity, this white candy that all Southern grandmothers make at Christmas which is basically pecans suspended in clouds of sugar. It looks gorgeous, but it kind of tastes like nonsense.

As someone who was basically addicted to divinity from ages 10 to 16, this is a fabulous explanation of the stuff. Way better than Turkish delight!*

_{*if you have a massive sweet tooth and would love to eat like, slightly more concentrated cotton candy}
posted by sciatrix at 12:02 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Twiglets, motherfuckers.

MARMITE FOR THE MARMITE GOD!
posted by Artw at 12:03 PM on December 3, 2015 [10 favorites]

One time, someone brought to the office a package of a sort of halvah that was blown into melt-in-your-mouth threads like cotton candy. That stuff was amazing, and I've never seen it again. Any wicked magical royalty out there who want to bribe me, see if you can find halvah fluff.
posted by moonmilk at 12:03 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

GOD when i was little someone explained divinity to me as a christmas thing and i misheard it as a CHRISTIAN thing so naturally i assumed it was aggressively trayf and imagine my tiny surprise when it did not turn out to be made of ham and lobster
posted by poffin boffin at 12:03 PM on December 3, 2015 [12 favorites]

NO HAM NO LOBSTER JUST DELICIOUS CLOUDS OF SUGAR AND SOFTNESS

(seriously, it's like entirely egg whites and sugar)
posted by sciatrix at 12:05 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I would also like to add that on basis of this thread I asked my Canadian spouse wtf a Big Turk bar was and the FIRST THING I HEARD was "those are terrible why would you want one"
posted by sciatrix at 12:06 PM on December 3, 2015 [15 favorites]

I just tried Turkish Delight before Thanksgiving, since a coworker brought some from his visit to Ankara.

It was decently good jelly candy, but I wouldn't sell out my brother to Tilda Swinton for it.
posted by pxe2000 at 12:07 PM on December 3, 2015

I grew up watching the BBC miniseries of The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe (which, y'know, beavers) and so had a visual reference for the Turkish Delight Edmond is offered by the White Witch. The box unwraps itself and opens to reveal stone-like moldy white blocks which Edmund starts eating. They look terrible.

Having no idea what Turkish Delight actually was, I assumed that the Witch had put a spell on Edmund and had *tricked* him into thinking this terrible paste he was eating was Turkish Delight. He'd already had the drink by then and was getting a bit too comfortable.

< /anecdote >
posted by maryr at 12:09 PM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

Until they cancelled out all the goodwill by inventing jaffa cakes.

you shut your mouth
posted by Kitteh at 12:10 PM on December 3, 2015 [10 favorites]

I've never read C.S. Lewis but I've had Turkish delight from the local Turkish supermarket. It's delicious. Sweet, chewy, crunchy.
posted by Bee'sWing at 12:15 PM on December 3, 2015

Canadians will be delighted and horrified to learn that Shoppers Drug Mart sells chocolate covered jujubes that taste exactly like Big Turk but in compulsive snacking form factor. They come in different colours (and theoretically, flavours) under the chocolate shell just like normal jujubes but they're all actually Big Turk.
posted by rodlymight at 12:17 PM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

I also spent way too much time imagining the foods described in the Little House on the Prairie series. Especially the maple candy made in snow.


Now, that, I understood. I figured it would be very like the nirvana that is maple sugar candy, only gooey-er and chewy.
posted by bearwife at 12:17 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

My mom had the good fortune of buying me a very fresh Turkish Delight. I thought it was delicious in its texture, but far too sweet.
posted by yueliang at 12:17 PM on December 3, 2015

I've tried making it but couldn't get the right texture. I'm tried molecular gastronomy recipes and traditional recipes, but authoritative information about the behavior and treatment of the starch gel is hard to find online.
posted by polymodus at 12:19 PM on December 3, 2015

I'm glad to know I wasn't the only person who thought it was divinity.

I was like "seriously, do they not have Stuckey's in their country?"

(No, they do not.)

(( I miss Stuckey's pecan roll too.))
posted by Lyn Never at 12:19 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

imagine my tiny surprise
posted by sweetkid at 12:19 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

Oh my. I didn't even think "Turkish Delight" was food. I mean this literally: when I read the book the first time, I could NOT FIGURE OUT what lured Edmund into this level of betrayal, but it definitely wasn't edible. Maybe I scanned too quickly in my desperation to find out what happened so I missed the salient points, but Edmund was seduced by something that was completely intangible to me.

Was it a ring? Was it a magical Turkish...fairy? Something luridly evil? I didn't know where Turkey was, so that was no help at all. I mean, the whole "Delight" thing smacked of something dirty, so I was really, really confused.

I was very disappointed when I finally found out that it was a sweet, and not a very good one at that.
posted by readymade at 12:19 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Mackintosh Toffee is really good, and I would eat it still if I didn't value my dental work.

I think it's worth noting that there are also toffee trees in Narnia that grow a much more delicious sounding toffee-fruit. I think it's The Magician's Apprentice this happens in, one of the many horrible children in the series plants a bag of toffees in the ground - they grow from that during the allegory for the Garden of Eden that happens.

Also the lamp post that they see in the Narnian woods grew from the handle of a lamp post that Jadis (the white witch, who does have a name here people, who is also the ruler of a horrible hell-world called Charn that has been destroyed by her uttering the most terrible word, which I think is an allegory for nuclear war) has plucked off of one in London when she is transported there by magic of some sort. She sort of brandishes it at various carriages and a policeman. Some random man keeps calling her a 'dem' fine woman' so you can hardly blame her for a little brandishing.
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 12:20 PM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

the maple candy made in snow.

Tire sur la neige/Tire d'érable is the best, somewhere between maple and caramel, warm and cold at the same time, chewy as toffee, but better. It's totally believable that a snotty 8-year-old would sell his sisters for it.
posted by bonehead at 12:21 PM on December 3, 2015 [6 favorites]

Between family friends who are Turkish and spending a couple of days in Istanbul on the way back from Pakistan once I had had Turkish delight prior to reading The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. I like the stuff, and could imagine that magical Turkish delight would be even better. Then one day I noticed that they had chocolate covered Turkish delight at the Bay and used up all of my spending money to buy it because Turkish delight is great. It was not great. The stuff spent all my money on was a Big Turk bar.

Apparently truckers like Big Turk so that may be why it is still around. This info was relayed by someone in my dorm whose family ran a convenience store.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 12:22 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

... maple candy made in snow

Not at all like those candies bearwife links (those are more like a dry sugar fudge), more like fresh awesome maple taffy (on preview what bonehead says).

It's everywhere in Quebec during sugaring season.
posted by Laura in Canada at 12:24 PM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

It was decently good jelly candy, but I wouldn't sell out my brother to Tilda Swinton for it.

There are many crimes that I would gladly commit for the sake of hanging out and eating candy with Tilda Swinton. I'd suffer Turkish Delight. I mean, its Tilda Swinton in forever winter on a carriage. I completely understand Edmond's choice, it's not really a choice at all. If Tilda Swinton asks you to betray your family, YOU BETRAY YOUR FAMILY, IT'S JUST THAT SIMPLE.
posted by Fizz at 12:25 PM on December 3, 2015 [23 favorites]

One thing I miss about living in Quebec are the proper maple cones. OMG
posted by Kitteh at 12:27 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

She could at least throw in some dark chocolate hobnobs. Those are the ones with the smack in them.
posted by Artw at 12:27 PM on December 3, 2015 [6 favorites]

I like Turkish Delight a lot, but I generally like flowery foods: jasmine tea, violet gum, Anis de Flavigny candy, orange blossom pastries, etc.

There is a fancy expensive Turkish Delight-scented perfume and it is just the best. If you want to smell like a sexy marshmallow in a marabou-trim dressing gown, this is your stuff.
posted by Metroid Baby at 12:30 PM on December 3, 2015 [12 favorites]

Maybe I missed something when reading the books as a child, but to my mind Edmund was just having a nice conversation with a strange lady who was plying him with candy. How was he supposed to know what would result from it? How could he have known at that point that she was evil?
posted by Soliloquy at 12:32 PM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

Creeps had not been invented back then.
posted by Artw at 12:35 PM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

I recall my girlfriend-at-the-time once telling me she had an unopened package of Turkish Delights that I could have if I liked. I agreed enthusiastically having confused the name with Turkish Golds. When she handed me a bag that definitely did not contain cigarettes, I rolled with it and ate one or two. Those were the last Turkish Delights I will probably ever eat.
posted by Don Don at 12:37 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Also, speaking of other American misunderstandings, am I the only American child who was baffled by the mention of "marks" in Voyage of the Dawn Treader?

I understood that, but while reading Prince Caspian I thought that the kids were all running around with sticks with fire on the end, not flashlights.
posted by Daily Alice at 12:41 PM on December 3, 2015 [9 favorites]

I thought of it as a toffee-caramel type thing also, basically a reasonably tasty confection that was nevertheless very stupid to wish for. I took it as a sign of Edmund's ultimate toolness that the White Witch said "what does your heart desire" and he said "ooo candy!" In my mind, even as a kid, there was an unwritten paragraph immediately following where the White Witch gives Edmund all the side-eye and thinks "are you serious, you piggy little shit, how can this be this easy?" I mean, this is after she's already called him an idiot and then stage-whispered "he is easily dealt with", you're kind of a sucker Eddie boy.

But then, I once traded a full Voltron toy set for 2 dollars so I could buy a bag of circus peanuts, so I probably shouldn't ride that high horse for too long.
posted by Errant at 12:45 PM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

The tOoffee tree candy from the Magicians Nephew sounds fucking rad, I'd be up for that.
posted by Artw at 12:47 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Tire sur la neige/Tire d'érable

In Vermont (well, south of Swanton, at least) it's sugar on snow and it's properly served, I am told, with a cider doughtnut, black coffee, and a pickle.

How to prepare: Boil maple syrup to the softball stage. Pour on fresh snow. Serve.
posted by maryr at 12:50 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

I took it as a sign of Edmund's ultimate toolness that the White Witch said "what does your heart desire" and he said "ooo candy!"

Okay yes Edmund is a tool but to be fair to him she did ask what he would like best TO EAT, it's not like he had a chance at eternal happiness and threw it away on Turkish Delight.

He just had a chance at perfect stuffing, with the exact right ratio of soft and crispy bits, and threw it away on Turkish Delight.

I've been thinking about that imaginary stuffing literally once a day since I started writing this. I don't even LIKE real stuffing that much.
posted by babelfish at 12:51 PM on December 3, 2015 [12 favorites]

Not at all like those candies bearwife links (those are more like a dry sugar fudge)

Yes, like in taste, as those candies I link are made of maple syrup. As I added, texture would have to be goo-ey, however.

I love confectionary arguments.
posted by bearwife at 12:57 PM on December 3, 2015

Maybe I missed something when reading the books as a child, but to my mind Edmund was just having a nice conversation with a strange lady who was plying him with candy. How was he supposed to know what would result from it? How could he have known at that point that she was evil?

Edmund has been warned about the White Witch by this point, hasn't he? Who did he THINK was riding around on a a fur-adorned sled doing magics? (Or did he sneak out before that discussion at the Beavers?)

But still, he's a kid - he's mad at his bossy older brother, his sisters keep taking his older brother's side, this place is awful and cold, he's tired of walking, this lady gave him possibly liquor and candy. I am certain we have all sold out our siblings for something meager at some point. It just resulted in them getting sent to sit in a corner, not getting their faun buddies turned into stone and such.
posted by maryr at 12:57 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

it's properly served, I am told, with a cider doughtnut, black coffee, and a pickle

presumably by a folksy patrician in a bow-tie. I'm only surprised that pie isn't involved.
posted by bonehead at 1:00 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

I guess that this is why they translated the Harry Potter books into American English for the US market.
posted by octothorpe at 1:05 PM on December 3, 2015

It isn't an adult betrayal. Edmund is not really in the image of Judas. She tricks him, and he is just a little boy. Here is the passage, which makes that clear:

‘‘It is dull, Son of Adam, to drink without eating,’’ said the Queen presently. ‘‘What would you like best to eat?’’ “Turkish Delight, please, your Majesty,” said Edmund.

The Queen let another drop fall from her bottle on to the snow, and instantly there appeared a round box, tied with green silk ribbon, which, when opened, turned out to contain several pounds of the best Turkish Delight. Each piece was sweet and light to the very centre and Edmund had never tasted anything more delicious. He was quite warm now, and very comfortable.

While he was eating the Queen kept asking him questions. At first Edmund tried to remember that it is rude to speak with one’s mouth full, but soon he forgot about this and thought only of trying to shovel down as much Turkish Delight as he could, and the more he ate the more he wanted to eat, and he never asked himself why the Queen should be so inquisitive. She got him to tell her that he had one brother and two sisters, and that one of his sisters had already been in Narnia and had met a Faun there, and that no one except himself and his brother and his sisters knew anything about Narnia. She seemed especially interested in the fact that there were four of them, and kept on coming back to it. “You are sure there are just four of you?” she asked. ‘Two Sons of Adam and two Daughters of Eve, neither more nor less?” and Edmund, with his mouth full of Turkish Delight, kept on saying, “Yes, I told you that before,” and forgetting to call her “Your Majesty” but she didn’t seem to mind now.

At last the Turkish Delight was all finished and Edmund was looking very hard at the empty box and wishing that she would ask him whether he would like some more. Probably the Queen knew quite well what he was thinking; for she knew, though Edmund did not, that this was enchanted Turkish Delight and hat anyone who had once tasted it would want more and more of it, and would even, if they were allowed, go on eating it till they killed themselves. But she did not offer him any more. Instead, she said to him,

“Son of Adam, I should so much like to see your brother and your two sisters. Will you bring them to me?”

“I’ll try,” said Edmund, still looking at the empty box.

“Because, if you did come again—bringing them with you of course—I’d be able to give you some more Turkish Delight. I can’t do it now, the magic will only work once. In my own house it would be another matter.”

‘Why can’t we go to your house now?” said Edmund. When he had first got on to the sledge he had been afraid that she might drive away with him to some unknown place from which he would not be able to get back, but he had forgotten about that fear now.

“It is a lovely place, my house,” said the Queen. “I am sure you would like it. There are whole rooms full of Turkish Delight, and what’s more, I have no children of my own. I want a nice boy whom I could bring up as a Prince and who would be King of Narnia when I am gone. While he was Prince he would wear a gold crown and eat Turkish Delight all day long; and you are much the cleverest and handsomest young man I’ve ever met. I think I would like to make you the Prince—some day, when you bring the others to visit me.”

“Why not now?” said Edmund. His face had become very red and his mouth and fingers were sticky. He did not look either clever or handsome whatever the Queen might say.
posted by bearwife at 1:05 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

Turkish Delight? I assumed it was baklava, but a little bit better, somehow. And I prefer it to remain that way.
posted by redsparkler at 1:09 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I am certain we have all sold out our siblings for something meager at some point.

relevant
posted by poffin boffin at 1:16 PM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

I'm reminded of when the book Maniac Magee spoke frequently and lovingly of Butterscotch Krimpets, and I, being from the West Coast, assumed they were a completely fictional product. Imagine my delight when a coworker brought in a pack from a care package his mother had sent from New Jersey.
posted by redsparkler at 1:16 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

"I love confectionary arguments."

You are correct. They both taste like maple.
posted by Laura in Canada at 1:16 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I totally thought it was like some super-deluxe amazing lunchmeat. So my headcanon will always involve Edmund scarfing down slices of magical bologna while cozying up to the White Witch.
posted by the turtle's teeth at 1:22 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Moonmilk, was it Pashmak? I have been obsessed with the idea of Pashmak ever since I saw it online, but I haven't been able to get my hands on any yet.
posted by atropos at 1:28 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

For some reason I thought it was cake. I think because the book talks about "taking another piece" and I was imagining slices of something that you cut off a piece of. Definitely sweet, probably brown and spicy because things from foreign places are spicy. Maybe with candy in it because it was a treat. Therefore probably kind of like fruitcake. People in England eat fruitcake, right? QED.
posted by aimedwander at 1:34 PM on December 3, 2015

Not being big on toffee, I didn't think much of his choices; it would take some kind of chocolate, at least, to get me to sell out my siblings.

You have to remember, there was a war on, and obviously chocolate was hard to come by for the White Witch.
posted by pwnguin at 1:42 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

presumably by a folksy patrician in a bow-tie. I'm only surprised that pie isn't involved.

Um, no, by my grandmother, a lifelong Vermonter and nurse, married to a paper mill worker. I can't say she's entirely non-patrician (good Congregationalist stock, her dad was big in the railroad) but folksy she's not. That's what they do in St. Albans, apparently, not that that's far south of Swanton.
posted by maryr at 1:43 PM on December 3, 2015

As a kid, I always imagined Turkish Delight as something puffy, with lots of sugar floating about. Then, I had a Turkish colleague for a few years, and she would occasionally bring in a box of the imported stuff. So I tried some. And promptly retreated to the world of chocolate.

The local Wegmans stocks some imported British chocolate bars, all of which are aerated, for some reason. Not that I object.
posted by thomas j wise at 1:56 PM on December 3, 2015

Hey, my in-laws are from Swanton, maryr. There's a decent chance we are related by marriage.
posted by Rock Steady at 1:57 PM on December 3, 2015

I like Big Turk, Mackintosh Toffee, and Eat-More bars

Hoopo I couldn't agree with you more! There are definitely people around who like Big Turk, they just usually get drowned out by the people who passionately hate fun! Just kidding, they definitely are an odd taste, but hey more for us.
posted by cirhosis at 1:58 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

We're St. A/Sheldon/Enosburg forever back on my mom's side. Cousins still live in Highgate. *high-fives*
posted by maryr at 1:59 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I always envisioned Turkish Delight as being essentially Girl Scout Cookies Caramel Delights (aka Samoas). Tasting actual Turkish Delight and finding it seriously lacking, however was a distant third* on my personal list of Things I Found Disappointing About Narnia.

*One being "this is actually about Jesus ?! WTF?!" Two being the fate of Susan Pevensie.
posted by thivaia at 2:05 PM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]

but soon he forgot about this and thought only of trying to shovel down as much Turkish Delight as he could

man, eating that much turkish delight? I read this story, but I don't recall Edmund shitting his pants. Turkish delight has laxative effects I'm pretty sure.
posted by Hoopo at 2:07 PM on December 3, 2015

The delight dissolves on the first sip. Ginger beer is NOT LIKE GINGER ALE OMG

As bonehead says, it's not - it's 10x better, if by ginger ale you mean the Canada Dry sort of thing.
posted by atoxyl at 2:13 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Definitely sweet, probably brown and spicy because things from foreign places are spicy.

I want this brown spicy cake of your imagination!
posted by sweetkid at 2:19 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

but I wouldn't sell out my brother to Tilda Swinton for it.


I, on the other hand, would sell out my brother just to hang out with Tilda Swinton, and maybe have, like, a martini or something.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:20 PM on December 3, 2015 [15 favorites]

I also was an Aplets&Cotlets tray-inhaler kid. I would have stabbed my mother in the kidney for a box of those.

But yeah, the rose-water corn starch globs that are more traditional are rather subtle for a kid raised on kit-kats and cocoa puffs. They're sweets meant to go with tea, not scarfed with Martinelli's non-alcoholic sparkling cider.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 2:27 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Misread "candies" upthread as "candles" and now resisting temptation to comment on the original article that when I was a kid I assumed Turkish Delight was blu-tac.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 2:30 PM on December 3, 2015

It's funny that people keep bringing up their nostalgia for the old, pants BBC version.


This is the one I remember from my childhood.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:31 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Windigo: Yes! Little House on the Prairie maple candy! But ALSO - I spent a good deal of time imagining the joy of eating a crunchy pig's tale, and blowing up a pig's bladder to play with like a balloon.

Anybody? Anybody?
posted by pretentious illiterate at 2:53 PM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

When I was a kid, I wouldn't have been able to articulate what I thought Turkish Delight was supposed to taste like, but many years later, my then-boyfriend took me to an extremely fancy restaurant where we were served these tiny squares of something as an after-dessert bite, and my immediate reaction was "This, this is exactly what I imagined Turkish Delight tasted like to Edumund."

It looked like a little square of pate de fruit, a small, glistening, sugar-encrusted gem on a plate, but the texture was totally unlike anything I had ever put in my mouth. I was expecting it to be chewy, and it almost was, but it was also smooth, tender, and somehow also bursting with juice. And the flavor was purest essence of tropical fruit: sweet, tangy, delicious, and most importantly, seemed utterly alien to the posh French setting. I think it was the strangeness that was the most important part for my Turkish Delight head canon. It wasn't just that it was sweet and delicious, but it had to feel deeply out of place, and therefore a little suspect. I immediately wanted more, but knew I probably would never get it again.

I imagine there was some kind of molecular gastronomy involved, since we never did figure out exactly what it was, and the only description we got from the waitstaff was thoroughly unsatisfactory, but years later, I can still remember that perfect and slightly unsettling bit of Narnia in my mouth.
posted by Diagonalize at 3:01 PM on December 3, 2015 [22 favorites]

You are all crazy. First of all, they are called loukoumia. Second, they are delicious.
posted by deanc at 3:24 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

big turks are amazing
posted by PinkMoose at 3:37 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

> They're sweets meant to go with tea, not scarfed with Martinelli's non-alcoholic sparkling cider.

That's the key, isn't it? It's like the Stella D'Oro cookies we'd sometimes get when I was a kid. I thought they were horribly dry and tasteless, but they're supposed to be eaten between sips of espresso or some amaro, and then they're perfect.
posted by benito.strauss at 3:42 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I always thought it would be way more amazing than it actually is.

Real Turkish Delight isn't worth betraying everyone for.
posted by jb at 3:47 PM on December 3, 2015

I like Turkish delight if it's reasonably fresh and made with good ingredients like pistachios, but I guess rosewater is an acquired taste for most non-middle-easterners?
posted by BrotherCaine at 3:52 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I was disappointed when I figured out this was that gross stuff served with coffee at Greek restaurants. (Of course, you mustn't call it Turkish coffee or Turkish Delight at a Greek joint.)

Rosewater ice cream seems to be much more approachable and appreciable for the average American (Western?) palate for some reason.
posted by snuffleupagus at 3:55 PM on December 3, 2015

I knew what it was and I love it. I can eat the pistachio and rosewater flavors by the poundful. I also adore Persian ice cream which is rose water and saffron flavored. I think the secret is not to overdo the rosewater so it doesn't end up tasting like perfume.
posted by nikitabot at 4:02 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

When I was in Istanbul they used to call me "English delight".
posted by turbid dahlia at 4:21 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

I have still never had Turkish Delight, but I think I might like it, because I have historically had sort of a weird taste for floral-y sorts of sweets. (Or other things kids my age didn't like; there used to be German marzipan candies at my grandmother's every Christmas and I was only ever allowed to have one and it was the saddest thing ever because everybody else barely tolerated them and I would sit there with my eye on the rest of the box.)

I think I managed to see the TV miniseries before I read the book, and therefore always knew roughly what they looked like, but I think I imagined them being cherry-flavored. At that age, I probably would have paid someone to take my little brother, but then we're into a different childhood favorite fantasy story entirely.
posted by Sequence at 4:32 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

"I honestly can't even remember it anymore, I was so angry and upset when I found out what Turkish Delight actually was that whenever I try to visualize it all I can see is disappointment." – Mallory Ortberg

As with all things, Mallory Ortberg voices my exact feelings on the matter.
posted by Anonymous at 4:45 PM on December 3, 2015

Take some fillet steak. Cube it neatly with a very sharp knife. Toss in flour.

Add a few cubes to the dainty plate of Turkish delight. Utterly indistinguishable.

Offer to Aunt Edith. You won't win every time, but when you do it's awesome.
posted by Combat Wombat at 4:50 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

I have seen this trick played with liver.
posted by Artw at 5:01 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]

Forgive me; I pictured a candy-coated turkey leg. In my defense I was very young.
posted by bq at 5:23 PM on December 3, 2015 [7 favorites]

I had English parents, so we had Turkish Delight every Christmas, usually brought over by visiting relatives or sent in a holiday care package. The English kind in the octagonal box. In various states of freshness. And I loved it--I still prefer it to real lokum with pistachios, to be honest. That rose and lemon selection, and the idea that this was an adult candy that the adults like--passed around before the sticky drinks and cheese come out after a big meal.
posted by Kafkaesque at 5:36 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

but I guess rosewater is an acquired taste for most non-middle-easterners?

the problem is that most people do it wrong/overdo it and it tastes like the smell of the ancient sachets in your gran's linen closet.
posted by poffin boffin at 5:42 PM on December 3, 2015

is it like a French tickler?
posted by ennui.bz at 6:07 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I would sell out my siblings for the week-old leavings of every Can-I-eat-that? AskMe thread I've ever read; I'd consider bad candy quite the bargain.

But that's more about my siblings than anything else...
posted by kythuen at 6:07 PM on December 3, 2015 [3 favorites]

Ginger beer is NOT LIKE GINGER ALE OMG. It is much, much, much spicier, and much less sweet

ooh, that sounds like vernor's
posted by pyramid termite at 6:09 PM on December 3, 2015

Ginger beer is NOT LIKE GINGER ALE OMG. It is much, much, much spicier, and much less sweet

ooh, that sounds like vernor's

Gah, still not even close!!
posted by TwoStride at 6:18 PM on December 3, 2015

Franco-American diners serve baked beans at breakfast with the eggs and meat of one's choice. They are thicker than the soupy beans one gets in the UK.

The first time I went to London I had so many acid drops that I shriveled my tongue.

I'm disappointed that I wasn't able to try the
Cadbury cola pretzel honeycomb before it was discontinued.
posted by brujita at 7:00 PM on December 3, 2015

Yeah, ginger beer is properly spicy and so much better than ginger ale, and I say this as someone whose default soft drink is ginger ale. It's like a liquid version of a spicy ginger candy.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 7:00 PM on December 3, 2015 [5 favorites]

I've no idea why anyone would bother with that Canada Dry stuff, it's basically lemonade.*

* the English kind. So, Sprite.
posted by Artw at 7:08 PM on December 3, 2015

For god's sake Kitteh, don't eat the Thrills!

Also, does anyone remember soap candy? Or that green chewy treat, gorgo? (Maybe not Canadian but somehow associated with Vancouver 80s punk scene...)
posted by chapps at 7:12 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

ooh, that sounds like vernor's

Nnnnnnnnnope, I'm a Michigan girl and Vernor's is my ginger ale of choice. As Vernor's is to Canada Dry, Old Jamaica is to Vernor's, except fifty times moreso. I mean, it's probably a fine drink if you're not expecting ginger ale. It's just... really, really not what I thought I'd be getting, and I was woefully unprepared.
posted by Andrhia at 7:59 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

I had a very clear flavor profile in my head: chocolate fudge with just a hint of carmel. What made it magical and addictive, I was certain, was that despite having the intensity and richness of the very best fudge I'd ever tasted, it was also so light and airy that it would crunch at the first bite and almost explode in your mouth into a perfect crystalline aerosolized essence of homemade fudge.
posted by deludingmyself at 8:03 PM on December 3, 2015

I thought Turkish delight was kind of like fairy floss (aka cotton candy). Given at the time I used to fantasise about a dream house that had root beer fountains and rooms of cool whip, I could totally understand why Edmund would sell out his family. Especially because it was ENCHANTED. Mind you, I did also think Edmund was a tool. I had already mastered the idea that if it tastes good, it is bad for you and you shouldn't eat it because then you will be a bad person. (Cue many years, still not overcome, of messed-up ideas about food.)

I like most kinds of Turkish delight, including the inauthentic Cadbury's version coated in chocolate, though I am not as fond of the sort with nuts in. The rosewater one is definitely the best though I have not tried mint, which sounds great.

And moonmilk, I am pretty sure you are talking about Persian fairy floss, also known as Pashmak (as atropos said above). (I can find plenty of places in Australia that sell it, but that's not much help to you.) You might also like soan papdi, an Indian sweet which is a bit like Persian fairy floss compressed into cubes, usually flavoured with rosewater and pistachio - so a combination of Turkish delight and Persian fairy floss. Yum!
posted by Athanassiel at 8:04 PM on December 3, 2015 [4 favorites]

Soap candy was solid win. Nothing quite like grabbing one, popping it in your mouth, and thinking "Mmmm, Dial"

Yes, yes, some savages call them Floral Gums. Those people are untrustworthy barbarians.
posted by aramaic at 8:11 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]

Ooh, pashmak looks like dragon's beard candy. Man, now I want all the candies.
posted by emeiji at 8:39 PM on December 3, 2015

Old fashioned sweet shop boiled sweets become chewy after being sucked for a bit.
posted by brujita at 9:57 PM on December 3, 2015

Goddammit, metafilter. I read this these this morning and it forced me to stop and buy a bar of Fry's on the way home. Which is to actual Turkish delight as mass-produced white bread is to homemade sourdough.
posted by lollusc at 12:29 AM on December 4, 2015

Heh... Fry's TD was a favourite of mine when I was a kid.

Kids don't know shit about food.
posted by pompomtom at 4:33 AM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

I also spent way too much time imagining the foods described in the Little House on the Prairie series.

Pa drinks a whole lot of whiskey in those books and I had no idea what that was when I was a kid, so I always thought it must be the best drink in the world, maybe something like cinnamon apple cider. I came pretty close to asking my parents for some and in retrospect I'm pretty glad we didn't have that conversation at the age of 10.
posted by andrewesque at 6:54 AM on December 4, 2015 [4 favorites]

Turkish Delight is closer to snozzcumber than frobscottle IMO.
posted by duffell at 6:56 AM on December 4, 2015 [3 favorites]

Some of the questions this thread has raised for me:

what do they call English Breakfast tea in England/the UK?

what do they call Canada Mints in Canada?

why is there no popular chocolate-covered jelly treat in the US? (that I can think of)

come to think of it, where's our toffee? Oh, wait, it's Skor, which sounds like a chewing tobacco brand, nevermind.

posted by maryr at 7:39 AM on December 4, 2015

why is there no popular chocolate-covered jelly treat in the US?

because we don't hate ourselves that much
posted by Kitteh at 7:41 AM on December 4, 2015 [5 favorites]

• What do they call American Chop Suey in America?

Wait.
posted by uncleozzy at 7:42 AM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

I googled Canada Mints, and I'd just call those peppermints. (Regardless of whether they were actually wintermint or spearmint flavoured.) Possibly dinner mints if they were passed around after dinner, though I think of dinner mints more as being the pillow shaped white, yellow, green and pink ones you get in Chinese restaurants.
posted by jacquilynne at 8:01 AM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

Why is there no popular chocolate-covered jelly treat in the U.S.?

Hello? Have you never heard of orange or raspberry jelly sticks? They are in every candy shop and quite nice when fresh.
posted by bearwife at 8:06 AM on December 4, 2015

what do they call English Breakfast tea in England/the UK?

Tea.
posted by Artw at 9:00 AM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]

bearwife, if you have to go to a specialty store, can you really call it "popular"? ;) Also, while I have seen the Trader Joe's brand of these, I have never seen either of the brands you link.

Artw, I can't tell if you are being sarcastic or not. English Breakfast here is a specific blend - Assam, Ceylon and Keemun teas, apparently. As opposed to, say, Irish Breakfast which is more heavily Assam.
posted by maryr at 9:09 AM on December 4, 2015

PG Tips.
posted by Artw at 9:32 AM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

(It's probably actually English Breakfast Tea, or just Breakfast Tea, since the various prefixes mean nothing, but people don't generally say that as it's the default tea.)
posted by Artw at 9:44 AM on December 4, 2015

Where's our toffee? Heath Bars and Almond Roca, at least as far as hard toffees go. For chewy, soft toffee we've got Mary Janes — which used to get classed as one of the junkier Halloween candies when I was a kid but I really like them.
posted by benito.strauss at 10:07 AM on December 4, 2015

I googled Canada Mints

me too and it was mostly about coins.

But the mints pictured? I've had them but I don't know if they have a specific name here, really. I'd probably call them "those pastel-colored mint candies, eh?"
posted by Hoopo at 10:45 AM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

if you have to go to a specialty store, can you really call it "popular"?

No, and I'd concede the point if we were talking about my favorite, chocolate covered orange peel, which is really hard to find in stores in the U.S. But orange sticks and raspberry sticks are easy to find in our grocery stores here in the candy section. I just provided the links as illustration that they are available online too.
posted by bearwife at 11:52 AM on December 4, 2015

> "... people don't generally say that as it's the default tea."

Yeah, it's what you get if you just order "tea". Anything else, you have to specify.

(Because of this, though, if you want, say, Scottish breakfast tea, you have to order it by that name, even in Scotland.)
posted by kyrademon at 12:04 PM on December 4, 2015

I knew that Turkish Delight came in a big round tin, like the Royal Dansk Christmas Cookies, but I knew that it was lots stickier than any cookie. I remember discovering baklava as an adult and realizing later "Ah, *this* is what the Witch gave to Edmund."
posted by fantabulous timewaster at 12:44 PM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

I think I assumed it was some kind of mincemeat pastry.
posted by janepanic at 3:07 PM on December 4, 2015

"May I see your passport, please. . . ."

This is where I first heard of TD, in high school. It's a reference to/from the first Firesign Theater record. A little later, I read the C.S.Lewis, and thought Edmund was being tempted by hashish. A few years after that, someone gave me a Fry's, a souvenir brought back from the UK -- and my reaction was, this is Turkish Delight? Blech, what's the big fuss? (And why no mention of this nasty in the article? Apparently, it's been sold there for a hundred years! So confusing!) I must confess I didn't know it was a common term for lokum until reading this thread -- and I was in Istanbul several years ago, where this great stuff I thought of as Aplets&Cotlets was everywhere. Thanks again MetaFilter, for tying it all together.
posted by Rash at 7:44 PM on December 4, 2015

I've had really good Turkish delight, heavily flavored with rosewater. But that's not the stuff you get in the boxes at the store, which is made of crystallized disappointment.

But it's still not something I'd trade my family for. Now, Trader Joe's DARK CHOCOLATE MINT STARS, on the other hand...
posted by happyroach at 10:55 PM on December 4, 2015 [3 favorites]

As an Aussie kid I knew what Turkish delight was (and I thought it was pretty good, though I preferred musk sticks if we were going pink and floral). However, I remember thinking that English kids mustn't have had any decent lollies or chocolate, otherwise he'd have asked for a Melody Pop, some Freckles, a packet of Whizz Fizz, a Bounty and those thin, oh-so-snappable Cadbury Furry Friends.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 3:23 AM on December 5, 2015

The odd thing about the Big Turk bar is that people must buy it, because they keep making it. Like I can go down to the corner store right now and buy a Big Turk. I wouldn't though, because they're awful. Who is buying these?

Yo. Not often, once a year or so. The secret is to lick all the chocolate off and then eat the not-at-all-like-the-real-stuff separately.

The real stuff is just oh my god. I really want to make it, but I'm so worried it won't turn out well and I will be SO DISAPPOINTED YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

Then again I LOVE Thrills so what do I know? (PS, Thrills are back, and the flavour is ALL WRONG. Instead of soap it tastes like sad cinnamon? No.)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 8:10 AM on December 5, 2015

However, I remember thinking that English kids mustn't have had any decent lollies or chocolate, otherwise he'd have asked for a Melody Pop, some Freckles, a packet of Whizz Fizz, a Bounty and those thin, oh-so-snappable Cadbury Furry Friends.

75% sure those first three are made up.
posted by maryr at 11:13 AM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]

I used to eat Big Turk bars, but then I discovered you could buy chocolate covered jujubes, which are basically the same thing, but in a more scarfable form factor.
posted by jacquilynne at 11:45 AM on December 5, 2015

Two things are for sure. Turks don't use corn syrup in it, and it doesn't taste like poo.

However, Hacı Bekir's is not the best. It's usually not fresh enough and runs a little dry. The best Turkish Delight I ever found was in a little shop west of the Hippodrome, which made its own. I only ever found the shop once. I bought 1 kg of rose and 1 of mastic and scarfed my booty to during long bus rides.

That said, the perfect sweet is not lokum but is ginger chocolate. /drool
posted by Autumn Leaf at 10:38 PM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]

Just a note on the rosewater issue: Authentic lokum (Turkish Delight) comes in a number of different varieties, of which rosewater is only one (and not even the most common). The most common is probably pistachio, and then there's hazelnut, mastic (definitely an acquired taste), rosewater, and many others. I don't really like rosewater (and am not particularly fond of mastic, either), but I love a good pistachio or hazelnut lokum -- especially the double roasted, which is a bit chewier (though it's not that easy to find). Divan is a decent brand that can often be found outside Turkey, if you want to try the real thing. As sobarel points out, the English make something that they call Turkish Delight that's only very vaguely related to real lokum.
posted by klausness at 7:47 AM on December 6, 2015

made of crystallized disappointment

Heh.
posted by chapps at 8:56 AM on December 6, 2015

Jelly Belly has started chocolate coating several of their flavors.
posted by brujita at 1:12 PM on December 6, 2015

Since this post I am seeing Turkish Delight everywhere. It was even in my local coffee shop behind their fancy carrot cake muffins and croissants... they have no other boxed treats or candy. hmmm.
posted by chapps at 10:55 PM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]

Baader-Meinhof Delight!
posted by pompomtom at 9:05 PM on December 7, 2015 [5 favorites]

Felicity Cloake's exploration of how to make it.
posted by Segundus at 4:33 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]

Felicity Cloake's exploration of how to make it.

I read that as 'Felicity Smoak' and thought it was a weird tie-in but I was tooootally going to roll with it.
posted by Andrhia at 1:48 PM on December 12, 2015