I'll do this until the election.
December 7, 2015 10:45 AM   Subscribe

 
Oh, and the original Tumblblog where Matt is soliciting others to join him.
posted by maxsparber at 10:47 AM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


I don't use the word "Hero" very often....
posted by Floydd at 10:49 AM on December 7, 2015 [117 favorites]


Damn beat by Floydd...
posted by Navelgazer at 10:52 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Does anybody read the dildos down here?
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 10:54 AM on December 7, 2015 [19 favorites]


"Up here," I think you mean.
posted by notyou at 10:58 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Someone's going to do this to Ted Cruz's Making Machine Gun Dildo Bacon, right?
posted by Etrigan at 10:59 AM on December 7, 2015


Matt Haughey? Doesn't ring a bell.
posted by bondcliff at 10:59 AM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


He's "too busy" to do a podcast once a month, but finds time for playing around with guns and dicks?
posted by Fig at 10:59 AM on December 7, 2015 [15 favorites]


we have vibrators
posted by boo_radley at 10:59 AM on December 7, 2015 [8 favorites]


Go, Matt, Go!
posted by rdone at 10:59 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Math Owie
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 11:00 AM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


Tricky Dick Nixon said, "Guns are an abomination."

It's fascinating how much the right-wing has shifted on showing off their guns/dildos.

Brilliant project. Psycho Republican gun owners deserve as much ridicule as can be heaped upon them.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 11:00 AM on December 7, 2015 [5 favorites]


(for real, this is brilliant. The concept of swapping one thing for another (ie guitars/slugs) makes me crack up every time )
posted by Fig at 11:01 AM on December 7, 2015


So, these dildos, they ... oh never mind.
posted by Daily Alice at 11:02 AM on December 7, 2015 [34 favorites]


On the other hand
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:03 AM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


This is a real dil-do rather than a dil-don't
posted by drezdn at 11:03 AM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


Matt really did move on to bigger and better things. Godspeed, sir.
posted by BlueJae at 11:04 AM on December 7, 2015 [33 favorites]


Both sides do it
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:06 AM on December 7, 2015 [5 favorites]


But there were already plenty of dildos in those photos.
posted by Gelatin at 11:08 AM on December 7, 2015 [55 favorites]


From my hot, sweaty hands!
posted by fullerine at 11:08 AM on December 7, 2015 [16 favorites]


The right to bare... what?

I don't know what to celebrate more about this, the genius of the concept, the skill of the execution, or the sumptuous selection in matthowie's toy drawer.
posted by Devonian at 11:10 AM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


Cocked and loaded...
posted by Miss Otis' Egrets at 11:10 AM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


It’s not the Twitter account we need, but it’s the Twiter account we deserve.
posted by Going To Maine at 11:11 AM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


This gun, it vibrates
posted by Going To Maine at 11:12 AM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


GOPDildo is one of the strangest sites I've seen in some time. I have no idea how these people got their dildos wedged into their politicians, or why.
posted by Dip Flash at 11:20 AM on December 7, 2015 [72 favorites]


This Matt guy is great. Someone hook him up with an account!
posted by Foci for Analysis at 11:21 AM on December 7, 2015 [30 favorites]


This Matt guy's number one in my book!
posted by TedW at 11:25 AM on December 7, 2015 [12 favorites]


I am just looking for a used dildo...what is all this?
posted by cortex at 11:27 AM on December 7, 2015 [17 favorites]


I'm so disappointed in the search results for "zippity bop dildo"
posted by romakimmy at 11:27 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I didn't think Matt could be more awesome. I was wrong!
posted by supermedusa at 11:29 AM on December 7, 2015


Wait I don't see the sex toys. Oh wait, the dildos are holding them.
posted by sexyrobot at 11:33 AM on December 7, 2015 [8 favorites]


*golf trophy clap*
posted by thelonius at 11:36 AM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Wait I don't see the sex toys. Oh wait, the dildos are holding them.


I'd call them dicks but they're too fake.
posted by C'est la D.C. at 11:37 AM on December 7, 2015 [5 favorites]


So this boomstick — it vibrates??
posted by stopgap at 11:40 AM on December 7, 2015 [7 favorites]


I have no idea how these people got their dildos wedged into their republicans, or why.
posted by The Whelk at 11:48 AM on December 7, 2015 [9 favorites]


I'm not sure how comfortable I would be pissing off and ridiculing a group of heavily armed, mentally unstable people.

But I am glad someone else is.
posted by el io at 11:50 AM on December 7, 2015 [5 favorites]


He's "too busy" to do a podcast once a month, but finds time for playing around with guns and dicks?

Why, what did you think he was too busy doing?
posted by nzero at 11:52 AM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


There is something to be said in favor of free time that one can use to just make the world better.
posted by JHarris at 11:55 AM on December 7, 2015 [7 favorites]


I'm not sure if those politicians would approve of this. Those dildos look like they are in experienced hands and well regulated.
posted by srboisvert at 12:01 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


This makes me very happy.
posted by Gygesringtone at 12:01 PM on December 7, 2015


I adore you, Matt Haughey.
posted by Sophie1 at 12:03 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I bet if you did the opposite and replaced sex-toys with guns in images, you'd have a pretty damning commentary on sexism in Western Culture as well.
posted by blue_beetle at 12:08 PM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


This dildo kills fascists.
posted by KingEdRa at 12:10 PM on December 7, 2015 [43 favorites]


I have no idea how these people got their dildos wedged into their republicans, or why.

I think there's an eHow for that.
posted by desjardins at 12:13 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


WHAT? no "Metafilter's own..."
posted by quonsar II: smock fishpants and the temple of foon at 12:13 PM on December 7, 2015 [7 favorites]


I'll give you my dildo when you pry it from my cold, dead hands
posted by chavenet at 12:15 PM on December 7, 2015


I bet if you did the opposite and replaced sex-toys with guns in images, you'd have a pretty damning commentary on sexism in Western Culture as well.

On the other hand, you don't see many Republicans holding actual dildos, except in dimly lit hotel rooms or bathhouses, so it's tough to get a good supply of Photoshop material to work from.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 12:18 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Trump's double-dicker is ...inspired.
posted by jonmc at 12:20 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


*golf trophy clap*

If you wiped those things down with bleach water, you wouldn't have caught that...
posted by y2karl at 12:27 PM on December 7, 2015 [34 favorites]


Now THAT is how you hold on to the base.







Caress it gently, even.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 12:30 PM on December 7, 2015 [34 favorites]


"I'll do this until the erection."
posted by LeLiLo at 12:32 PM on December 7, 2015 [11 favorites]


Polls Positive after Pols Pet Poles
posted by tonycpsu at 12:37 PM on December 7, 2015 [21 favorites]


The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a dildo is a good guy with a dildo.
posted by dazed_one at 12:45 PM on December 7, 2015 [5 favorites]


How cool!
I can't wait for Matt to tell us what the restroom in Trump's lawyers' offices looks like. I bet it's all gold-plated!
posted by Thorzdad at 12:46 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


While Haughey has no problem with dildos —”everyone should have one and no one should feel any shame for owning one”

Should make for a pretty interesting Xmas morning in the Haughey household
posted by item at 12:47 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


I am just looking for a used dildo...what is all this?

If you push Amazon's faceted search hard enough, it will eventually give you the new/used option on dildos.
posted by zippy at 12:57 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


If this is what life after Metafilter looks like, I'm never leaving.
posted by dr_dank at 1:01 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


I hope Matt really enjoys his fifteen inches minutes of fame.
posted by orange swan at 1:04 PM on December 7, 2015 [5 favorites]


If you push Amazon's faceted search hard enough, it will eventually give you the new/used option on dildos.

Used? Used?!
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 1:17 PM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


"If you grow up in rural areas where dildos are accepted, are part of life, used for recreation, sports, family gatherings ... you see that there is nothing wrong with owning one."
posted by straight at 1:22 PM on December 7, 2015 [47 favorites]


Maybe Matt got this idea all by himself, or maybe he saw this MetaFilter post. Either way, it worked for Canada, it may work for Murrica.
posted by CCBC at 1:23 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


“But since when did the dildo automatically become a bad word? A dildo in the hands of a secret service agent protecting our president isn’t a bad word.”
posted by straight at 1:24 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


"It's better to have a dildo and not need it than to need a dildo and not have it."
posted by straight at 1:27 PM on December 7, 2015 [31 favorites]


"I have to admit that I saw dildos as inherently evil ... I have learned, however, that in trained hands, just the presence of a dildo can be a real "man stopper." I am sorry that women have had to resort to this."
posted by straight at 1:29 PM on December 7, 2015 [18 favorites]


"I have a very strict dildo control policy: if there's a dildo around, I want to be in control of it."
posted by straight at 1:30 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


“The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a dildo is a good guy with a dildo.”
posted by Going To Maine at 1:31 PM on December 7, 2015 [7 favorites]


"Dildos don't fuck people. People fuck people."
posted by valkane at 1:35 PM on December 7, 2015 [21 favorites]


I just want to go on record as not realizing what I was looking at on Twitter until I clicked. But in an instant I realized this was the moment Twitter was created for.
posted by tommasz at 1:39 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Good to see that mathowie soundly avoided the sophomore slump.
posted by DynamiteToast at 1:44 PM on December 7, 2015


To conquer a nation, you must first remove the dildos from its citizens.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 1:46 PM on December 7, 2015


"There is nothing else I’d rather hold in my hand when fighting government tyranny than a bible in my left hand and in my right hand, a dildo, a symbol of freedom and liberty and the United States of America.”
posted by straight at 1:47 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


Here's hoping he keeps it up.
posted by DynamiteToast at 1:49 PM on December 7, 2015 [8 favorites]


How doea presidential candidate Deez Nutz poll on this issue, and how does it play with his base?
posted by zippy at 1:54 PM on December 7, 2015 [17 favorites]


Maybe Matt got this idea all by himself, or maybe he saw this MetaFilter post. Either way, it worked for Canada, it may work for Murrica.

And people are always scoffing at our Worthwhile Canadian Initiatives.
posted by Kabanos at 1:54 PM on December 7, 2015


"Responsibly normalizing dildos is the only answer. But normalizing dildos is not an easy task. To put a dildo in every household in America and to encourage responsibility when handling dildos is not a simple, cheap thing to do. Many people will be opposed to the idea; most people have no use for a dildo and never want to even come close to a dildo."
posted by straight at 2:00 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


(an NRA-funded study released last week recommended putting dildos in every school in America)
posted by straight at 2:02 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


"There's nothing wrong with dildos, they're just a tool like any other tool. I don't see anybody has problems with pictures of people holding wrenches or hammers, what's wrong with holding a dildo?"
posted by P.o.B. at 2:04 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


You can't stop people from having dildos. Soon, 3D printers will let people make their own single-use dildos at home.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 2:07 PM on December 7, 2015 [9 favorites]


I'm quite looking forward to my holiday reading list, which includes:

Dildos, Germs and Steel: The Fates of Human Societies

Johnny Got His Dildo

and

The Dark Tower: The Dildoslinger

And I'm sure at some point we'll curl up for a rewatch of The Dildos of Navarone.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 2:07 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


WHAT? no "Metafilter's own..."

It's actually the other way around.
posted by zamboni at 2:13 PM on December 7, 2015 [19 favorites]


I bet if you did the opposite and replaced sex-toys with guns in images, you'd have a pretty damning commentary on sexism in Western Culture as well.

Easy there, Banksy
posted by emptythought at 2:17 PM on December 7, 2015 [24 favorites]


Used? Used?!

You better believe it. Here's more info from the NRA website (and a little help from Chrome's Word Replacer II extension):
As we grow older and make plans for our loved ones and special treasures,
all dildos owners must eventually answer one question, "What will happen
to my dildos when I'm gone?" For many NRA members and friends, the answer
is NRA Dildos For Freedom, a unique program supporting the liberties that
built this country through gifts of dildos.

Guns you donate now can help preserve our American way of life in the future - and possibly provide you tax deductions and other benefits. It's more important than ever to safeguard your values and those of the NRA. Your dildos helped define your life. Now, let them be your legacy.
posted by Kabanos at 2:20 PM on December 7, 2015 [7 favorites]


heh, mediaite picked this up... go matt!
posted by lazywhinerkid at 2:24 PM on December 7, 2015


Used? Used?!

As seen at the best thrift store to ever exist in seattle.

I also saw tons of stained vibrators and other stuff.
posted by emptythought at 2:24 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


heh, mediaite picked this up... go matt!

“Interestingly, Haughey didn’t include the lone female Republican presidential candidate, Carly Fiorina, in the mix.”

Seems like a valid critique.
posted by Going To Maine at 2:44 PM on December 7, 2015


I'd also like to see this done with Democrats. Look at this monster.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 2:47 PM on December 7, 2015


Look at this monster.

Oh dear. Or this hapless fellow.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 2:54 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Everybody now! Happiness is a warm...
posted by artdrectr at 2:56 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


Seems like a valid critique.

Has Carly Fiorina had one of these photo-ops with a gun yet? A quick google search doesn't turn up anything. It's not fair unless someone is holding a weapon in the original photo.

That said, here's hoping someone will take a Michael Dukakis tank ride before the election is over.
posted by Gary at 2:58 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


The Dildo area has a long history, going as far back as 2000 BC [...] By 700 AD, people of the Dorset culture inhabited Dildo Island. In 1613, Henry Crout, whilst sailing up Dildo Arm, came in contact with the Beothuks, who were residing on Dildo Island[...] The town of Dildo was founded in the late 18th century and settled to exploit the abundance of marine resources such as fish (mostly cod), whales and seals.
posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 2:59 PM on December 7, 2015


*slow clap* bravo Mr Haughey, bravo.
posted by photoslob at 3:04 PM on December 7, 2015


I'm heading down to the range to shoot.
posted by Seymour Zamboni at 3:12 PM on December 7, 2015


Sounds hot.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 3:40 PM on December 7, 2015


Guns you donate now can help preserve our American way of life in the future

Flagged as an offensive derail. Why you gotta barge in and start talking about guns in the middle of our peaceful, wholesome discussion of dildoes?
posted by straight at 4:07 PM on December 7, 2015


We have dildos.
posted by eriko at 4:14 PM on December 7, 2015


HI I'M ON METAFILTER AND I COULD OVERTHINK A PLATE OF DILDOS.
posted by eriko at 4:16 PM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


So, just out of curiosity, is it a flock of dildos? A gaggle? A clutch? What?
posted by valkane at 4:28 PM on December 7, 2015


HI I'M ON METAFILTER AND I COULD OVERTHINK A PLATE OF DILDOS.

They typically are easier to corral in a bag.

So, just out of curiosity, is it a flock of dildos? A gaggle? A clutch? What?

"A protuberance of dildos" is the preferred nomenclature.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 4:32 PM on December 7, 2015 [9 favorites]


I didn't know who did it when I first saw this done-but I thought it was childish and stupid.

Now that I know it was Matt-I am very very disappointed. You are better than this.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 4:35 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


lol irl
posted by poffin boffin at 4:38 PM on December 7, 2015 [29 favorites]


Understandable you'd be upset, I've seen what one of those weapons can do to a bunny.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 4:42 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


I didn't know who did it when I first saw this done-but I thought it was childish and stupid.

You know what's childish and stupid? Allowing 30,000+ people to die by guns because you are too afraid of losing the votes of the ignorant.
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 4:54 PM on December 7, 2015 [48 favorites]


I didn't know who did it when I first saw this done-but I thought it was childish and stupid.

Not to mention tasteless, craven, and ghoulishly pandering.

Oh, wait. You were talking about the dildo photoshops and not the original gun photo ops?

Never mind.
posted by Atom Eyes at 4:54 PM on December 7, 2015 [60 favorites]


childish and stupid

Yah cuz waving guns around a political arena isn't that at all, nope, nuh uh.
posted by carsonb at 4:58 PM on December 7, 2015 [14 favorites]


Good on you mathowie, taking on the NRA and the Republican establishment in one bold thrust! I laughed a lot when I saw this on Twitter last night, not just because it's funny but because it's mathowie, hehe.

It reminds me tho - when I was about 11 or 12 I heard somebody call someone a dildo and without knowing what a dildo was I thought the word was hilarious sounding and I called people dildos all the time until I was about 16 or 17 when a teacher stopped me. Ooopsie.

It was an innocent pre-Internet time so probably a lot of people that I called a dildo had no idea, adults included. I sometime wonder how we learned about anything pre-internet.
posted by madamjujujive at 5:10 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


Now that I know it was Matt-I am very very disappointed. You are better than this.

Agreed; a simple use of the "feather" tool in photoshop will make the outlines of the dildos blend in much more realistically to the picture backgrounds.
posted by Greg Nog at 5:21 PM on December 7, 2015 [67 favorites]


I didn't know who did it when I first saw this done-but I thought it was childish and stupid.

Phallic graffiti is old as empires. Your heroes are in the company of Caesars. Celebrate their place in ancient history!
posted by a lungful of dragon at 5:27 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


I sometime wonder how we learned about anything pre-internet.

It's called reading the dictionary. The hours I spent...

/derail

Thanks, Matt; this is gold!
posted by allthinky at 5:34 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Phallic graffiti is old as empires.

Reminds me of the excellent book Reign of the Phallus: Sexual Politics in Ancient Athens. 477 pages and "profusely illustrated."
posted by jedicus at 5:56 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Well, this is kinda the definition of a dick move.
posted by valkane at 6:00 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Dick Move
posted by Artw at 6:05 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


I just want to know what the hell Mike Huckabee is doing to his Ruff Ryder's left testicle. Who taught him to handle his dildo that way? Either way, he needs to be kept away from dildos until he can learn to keep his finger away from the trigger.
posted by wierdo at 6:07 PM on December 7, 2015


Now that I know it was Matt-I am very very disappointed. You are better than this.

Mommmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
posted by shakespeherian at 6:13 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


previously, Stephen Harper
posted by LobsterMitten at 6:15 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


So, just out of curiosity, is it a flock of dildos? A gaggle? A clutch? What?

"bulbous salutation"
posted by Daily Alice at 6:39 PM on December 7, 2015 [7 favorites]


a thrust of dildos, obviously.
posted by poffin boffin at 6:44 PM on December 7, 2015 [11 favorites]


butts dildos lol
posted by cynical pinnacle at 6:46 PM on December 7, 2015


Incidentally, I posted this to my secret identity facebook, and it's getting mad likes.
posted by Saxon Kane at 7:02 PM on December 7, 2015


If you rearrange the letters it spells "solidd", like a seventies detective approving of an action and really punching the last syllable
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 7:03 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


Cocks not Glocks
posted by homunculus at 7:11 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Matt Haughey, you are fabulous. This is a Great Thing. Big huzzahs all around!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:14 PM on December 7, 2015


You are better than this.

What a stupendously condescending thing to say.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:22 PM on December 7, 2015 [14 favorites]


You are better than this:

8==============D
posted by Artw at 7:40 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


Over the weekend, my Twitter was basically retweets of this and @dog_rates. I apologize if any followers suffered thematic whiplash.
posted by EvaDestruction at 7:46 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


It's got a walnut stock, cobalt-blue steel, and a hair trigger.
Shop Smart! Shop S(ex)-Mart!
posted by quinndexter at 7:49 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


a thrust of dildos, obviously.

A buttload.
posted by Going To Maine at 8:04 PM on December 7, 2015 [11 favorites]


Metafilter: you are better than this.
posted by datawrangler at 8:11 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


It's "a sproing of dildos", or a sproi-oi-oi-oi-oing if we're talking quantities greater than a dozen.
posted by tonycpsu at 8:12 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I dunno, I think "a quiver of dildos" is the obvious one.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 8:44 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


Gives a whole new meaning to the quiverfull movement.
posted by Going To Maine at 8:57 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


The Speaker of the NYC Council tweeted about this and I've never been so proud.
posted by Mavri at 9:07 PM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


The Speaker of the NYC Council tweeted about this

Really? Can you send me a link, my mentions tab is a nightmare of activity and I can't locate anything.
posted by mathowie at 9:49 PM on December 7, 2015


Oh nevermind, finally found it!
posted by mathowie at 10:14 PM on December 7, 2015


I, uh, have a question.

Were those, um, resized via Photoshop or do I just look at the wrong places on the webs? Cause wow. Those, ah, barrels on those pieces are, erm, terrifying.
posted by sio42 at 10:31 PM on December 7, 2015


valkane: ""Dildos don't fuck people. People fuck people.""

Unless you are me. Then I am just single and fucked.
posted by Samizdata at 11:09 PM on December 7, 2015


"Political power grows out of the shaft of a dildo" - Mao, ze Dong.
posted by Devonian at 5:38 AM on December 8, 2015 [14 favorites]


"All you need for happiness is a good dildo, a good horse, and a good wife."
– Daniel Boone
posted by Kabanos at 7:56 AM on December 8, 2015 [3 favorites]


"All you need for happiness is a good dildo, a good horse, and a good wife."
– Daniel Boone


And all your wife needs for happiness is the dildo and the horse, so watch your back, Danny-boy.
posted by not that girl at 8:12 AM on December 8, 2015 [9 favorites]


I was going to quote Godard but it suddenly seemed in bad taste.
posted by shakespeherian at 8:18 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]




The Aristocrats!
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 9:07 AM on December 8, 2015 [5 favorites]


Well, they certainly have a talent for vulgar performance. Someone needs to inform Fiore that the seasonal sentiment is Peace on Earth, not piece.
posted by Westringia F. at 9:24 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


the seasonal sentiment is Peace on Earth, not piece.

You can't spell manger without anger.
posted by zippy at 9:45 AM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


"A protuberance of dildos" is the preferred nomenclature.

The protuberance is not the issue here.

Oh, he just changes the photos, well…

I’m thinking it’s possible to do something analogous to pieing without risking the assault and battery charges.

Indeed, one would replace a dangerous weapon with a harmless sex toy. That would make a nice, unphotoshopped picture.

A bit back G.W. Bush had his wristwatch lifted when he worked a crowd. Can’t be too hard.

You’d need a slight of hand artist to do a sort of bait and switch. Dave Bonsall or Derren Brown level stuff.
Hmmm....
posted by Smedleyman at 10:47 AM on December 8, 2015


this...is relevant to my interests
posted by triggerfinger at 10:51 AM on December 8, 2015


More like Heckler and Cock amirite?
posted by ob at 11:25 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


I bet if you did the opposite and replaced sex-toys with guns in images, you'd have a pretty damning commentary on sexism in Western Culture as well.

Yeah, when I hear the word "culture," I reach for my...
posted by straight at 12:47 PM on December 8, 2015


... revolver
posted by zippy at 1:24 PM on December 8, 2015


More like Heckler and Cock amirite?

FN Herstallion
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 1:24 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


Somewhere at the intersection of tampons, dildos, guns, and the GOP is the newly-approved XSTAT Rapid Hemostasis System for near-instantly plugging gunshot wounds.
posted by Going To Maine at 3:01 PM on December 8, 2015


Chris Rock and Chris Farley, Co-inventors
posted by zippy at 3:09 PM on December 8, 2015


Life imitates art, apparently.
posted by Going To Maine at 3:21 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


I didn't know who did it when I first saw this done-but I thought it was childish and stupid.

It's actually extremely smart. By replacing one object with another you can really see the ludicrousness of the poses. These politicians are so eager to establish their bona fides that they over play their hands. What other tool would require that particular look, that body language? Make no mistake. These posed shots are pulling double duty: a thumb in the eye to people who want gun control and a dog whistle to gun advocates. Can you imagine any politician brandishing a gavel or a hammer or a hedge trimmer with that much glee and adoration? By replacing the gun with a comical sex toy it makes it obvious how unnatural and theatrical these pictures are.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:14 PM on December 8, 2015 [16 favorites]


I bet if you did the opposite and replaced sex-toys with guns in images, you'd have a pretty damning commentary on sexism in Western Culture as well.

I know I have seen art pieces that did something similar, with guns superimposed on women's crotches, for example. It was somewhat in the style of Cindy Sherman, but it wasn't her. Anyway, along with all the montages of penis-guns, it's a trope that people have experimented with before, and the GOPdildo images fit into that.
posted by Dip Flash at 7:14 PM on December 8, 2015


Actually if I was going to photoshop anything into someone's hands...it would be a bunny. I would like it very much if someone did that instead.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 8:36 PM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


It's just the term 'gun-fetishist' made literal.
posted by shakespeherian at 9:13 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


Charlton Heston, but instead of holding up that old-timey rifle he's holding Bugs Bunny by the ears while he eats a carrot


Bugs Bunny I mean, not Heston
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 9:24 PM on December 8, 2015


Actually if I was going to photoshop anything into someone's hands...it would be a bunny. I would like it very much if someone did that instead.

What if I told you the various objects in this thread were really just XXL gom jabbar?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:45 PM on December 8, 2015


Secret Life of Gravy nails it.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:03 AM on December 9, 2015


Bugs Bunny I mean

St. Alia of the Bugs Bunnies
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:05 AM on December 9, 2015


bunnyscarryingdildos.tumbler.com

This GOP dildo thing is a strange case of worlds colliding as it's showing up on the Facebook feed of friends who, as far as I know, aren't MeFites.
posted by bondcliff at 6:45 AM on December 9, 2015


it's showing up on the Facebook feed of friends who, as far as I know, aren't MeFites.

It's a big ol' internet out there, friend! There are connections within connections within connections! It's a swirling vortex of connections! And Matt Haughey, God bless him, has transcended the blue boundaries of our little corner of this vastness, and resonated out into the wider digital-pixel world, where Republicans proudly and triumphantly wield dildos of all colors and sizes! Hallelujah!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:15 AM on December 9, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thanks for posting this. As if Metafilter and Fuelly.com didn't already add enough to my life. This is just genius.
posted by MacChimpman at 7:44 AM on December 9, 2015






Psst, it looks like we'll be toasting tonight's gathering of dildo aficionados here.
posted by homunculus at 5:55 PM on December 15, 2015


Related post.
posted by homunculus at 6:03 PM on December 24, 2015


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