You're thinking of water
January 7, 2016 12:47 PM Subscribe
Periods aren't that gross (SLYT)
This was funny in a way that I totally didn't expect, so kudos.
But, as a uterus-having person, I'd like to go on the record to state that periods are gross in the same way that pooping is gross, and pretending that they are some magical moon goddess earth mother time (which this video doesn't do) is annoying and dumb even though they are natural and healthy and most ladies have to deal with them a few hundred times, which leads into the fact that dudes who freak out about the mere thought of lady blood are even more annoying and dumb and should grow up.
posted by sparklemotion at 1:32 PM on January 7, 2016 [33 favorites]
But, as a uterus-having person, I'd like to go on the record to state that periods are gross in the same way that pooping is gross, and pretending that they are some magical moon goddess earth mother time (which this video doesn't do) is annoying and dumb even though they are natural and healthy and most ladies have to deal with them a few hundred times, which leads into the fact that dudes who freak out about the mere thought of lady blood are even more annoying and dumb and should grow up.
posted by sparklemotion at 1:32 PM on January 7, 2016 [33 favorites]
I was expecting to be annoyed, but it was funny.
And periods are a bit gross, yeah. Unused pads and tampons aren't gross and the aisle doesn't have cooties.
posted by jeather at 1:33 PM on January 7, 2016 [8 favorites]
And periods are a bit gross, yeah. Unused pads and tampons aren't gross and the aisle doesn't have cooties.
posted by jeather at 1:33 PM on January 7, 2016 [8 favorites]
Handling tampons and pads is in the same category as handling toilet paper. We all know what they're for, but they're necessary (unless you prefer peanut butter jars), so come on now.
posted by numaner at 1:48 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by numaner at 1:48 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
Note to self: don't eat the peanut butter at numaner's place.
Especially not the stuff that's got the jam mixed in already.
posted by sparklemotion at 1:58 PM on January 7, 2016 [25 favorites]
Especially not the stuff that's got the jam mixed in already.
posted by sparklemotion at 1:58 PM on January 7, 2016 [25 favorites]
What is gross about beakers of bright blue liquid poured onto gleaming white products in a lab?
posted by Dip Flash at 2:04 PM on January 7, 2016 [20 favorites]
posted by Dip Flash at 2:04 PM on January 7, 2016 [20 favorites]
I have a good attitude about menstruation. was kindly burned into my me by kind high school girls who were friends.
posted by jeribus at 2:07 PM on January 7, 2016 [15 favorites]
posted by jeribus at 2:07 PM on January 7, 2016 [15 favorites]
Hint to "Manly Men": tampons are great for stopping blood from flowing from holes in your body. If you're a paranoid dweeb that can't "man up" enough to be seen buying tampons for your lady friend, just go with the excuse that you're putting them in your gun bag or first aid kit; because you know, people actually do that too.
posted by Xyanthilous P. Harrierstick at 2:09 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Xyanthilous P. Harrierstick at 2:09 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
the other day there was one of those "ask anything you want with no judgement" threads on reddit and someone asked a question about vaginal discharge, and it became obvious very quickly that a lot of cis men think that's only a thing that happens when women are overtly turned on (and "too much" means they're slutty) and is as "disgusting" as menstrual blood and any woman who suggests that men - especially straight men - learn about how vaginas work are some sort of crazy feminists because men don't need to know about our "gross" bodies. i want to go and dm every single one of them about the demons...
posted by nadawi at 2:17 PM on January 7, 2016 [30 favorites]
posted by nadawi at 2:17 PM on January 7, 2016 [30 favorites]
Yeah, there's this thing called the XStat that is basically a big syringe filled with miniature tampons that can plug up a gunshot wound within seconds. (Video is SFW but a bit gross in parts.)
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:26 PM on January 7, 2016
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:26 PM on January 7, 2016
I'd like to go on the record to state that periods are gross in the same way that pooping is gross
Eh. I don't find them gross. You're free to be grossed out by them but they're not gross by definition.
I'm pleased when grown men are all "eeeew!" because it saves me the effort of working out whether they're an immature asshole or not.
posted by billiebee at 2:28 PM on January 7, 2016 [16 favorites]
Eh. I don't find them gross. You're free to be grossed out by them but they're not gross by definition.
I'm pleased when grown men are all "eeeew!" because it saves me the effort of working out whether they're an immature asshole or not.
posted by billiebee at 2:28 PM on January 7, 2016 [16 favorites]
i would be tempted to act out blood in the boardroom on his chair.
posted by nadawi at 2:34 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by nadawi at 2:34 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
To this day, I never understood why anyone would consider anything about the menstrual process to be gross at all. I grew up with older women in my family, and the neighborhood was dominated with older girls. Everybody was tampon friendly. I'm not joking, I got sent up to Tom's Pharmacy more than once for some Tampax in my youth.
It's a harsh reality when your tomboy baseball friend suddenly grows ten inches and has boobs and is complaining about how bad her period hurts. You can read all the "Are you there God, it's me Margaret?" you want, but it's still your fourteen year old best friend crying on the floor.
All I got with puberty was husky and hairy. I didn't have to fight my body every other fortnight or so. Gross? You have to be kidding me.
posted by Sphinx at 3:25 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
It's a harsh reality when your tomboy baseball friend suddenly grows ten inches and has boobs and is complaining about how bad her period hurts. You can read all the "Are you there God, it's me Margaret?" you want, but it's still your fourteen year old best friend crying on the floor.
All I got with puberty was husky and hairy. I didn't have to fight my body every other fortnight or so. Gross? You have to be kidding me.
posted by Sphinx at 3:25 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
Bulletin from mad socialist Scandinavia: I've never, ever met a male person who was put off by menstruation. Even the most ridiculous, sensitive or macho men I have known have been less worried than me about bodily fluids.
I know, these days, the manly men of the north are racist, sexist and generally intolerable. But we need to acknowledge what they've got for them: they genuinely appreciate women as real, whole people.
Jokes aside, medical researchers across the globe are currently revising the fundamental concept that for all of history human=male. Because it is absurd, since half of us are not at all male. When we see certain fundamental functions as gross, we are replicating the concept that males are normal whereas females are other. Which is gross. Hey, male person, is your mother inhuman? Or your wife? It makes absolutely no sense at all.
Reading the above, I can see that I am angry and unfocused. This is because the extent of this is so immense that I cannot make a clear-cut reasonable internet-sized comment. I'd need a book.
posted by mumimor at 3:28 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
I know, these days, the manly men of the north are racist, sexist and generally intolerable. But we need to acknowledge what they've got for them: they genuinely appreciate women as real, whole people.
Jokes aside, medical researchers across the globe are currently revising the fundamental concept that for all of history human=male. Because it is absurd, since half of us are not at all male. When we see certain fundamental functions as gross, we are replicating the concept that males are normal whereas females are other. Which is gross. Hey, male person, is your mother inhuman? Or your wife? It makes absolutely no sense at all.
Reading the above, I can see that I am angry and unfocused. This is because the extent of this is so immense that I cannot make a clear-cut reasonable internet-sized comment. I'd need a book.
posted by mumimor at 3:28 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
The video made me laugh out loud. And I haven't had a period for something like ten years.
posted by Peach at 3:30 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Peach at 3:30 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
Magical moon goddess earth mother menstruation (what a mouthful!) is one of those strange topics where I have only heard people complaining about it - but never the supposed period-positivity.
Is this really a thing?
posted by Behemoth, in no. 302-bis, with the Browning at 3:31 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
Is this really a thing?
posted by Behemoth, in no. 302-bis, with the Browning at 3:31 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
they had a frank conversation wherein she learned that he believed:
- Women can hold their periods the same way we hold pee or poop til we get to the bathroom; therefore
- She had not been properly trained, and/or was a slob, and
- Tampons are not necessary if one possesses enough self-control, and
- Most of what women do in the bathroom is just fooling around, malingering.
Please tell me the punchline is that she worked for Todd Akin
posted by The Gooch at 3:33 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
- Women can hold their periods the same way we hold pee or poop til we get to the bathroom; therefore
- She had not been properly trained, and/or was a slob, and
- Tampons are not necessary if one possesses enough self-control, and
- Most of what women do in the bathroom is just fooling around, malingering.
Please tell me the punchline is that she worked for Todd Akin
posted by The Gooch at 3:33 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
A friend of mine once lent me one of those moon goddessey books. It had pictures of different outfits to wear during various points in your cycle to express your specific powers or whatever, and the author would save her discharge in a jar to water her plants with, and stuff like that.
Yeah, it was silly and the pictures of the author modeling the outfits were hilarious, but they were enjoying themselves.
posted by ernielundquist at 3:42 PM on January 7, 2016
Yeah, it was silly and the pictures of the author modeling the outfits were hilarious, but they were enjoying themselves.
posted by ernielundquist at 3:42 PM on January 7, 2016
Maybe people are talking about different types of gross? Humans are kinda gross, generally. Nasal mucousboogers is gross. That doesn't mean that noses are "unclean" or that, like, buying kleenex is some kind of awful task, but it does mean that you can chase someone around the room with some on your finger.
I don't even know where that analogy is going and I might just be immature.
boogers
posted by quaking fajita at 3:43 PM on January 7, 2016 [25 favorites]
I don't even know where that analogy is going and I might just be immature.
boogers
posted by quaking fajita at 3:43 PM on January 7, 2016 [25 favorites]
that was funny in ways I was not expecting. and yeah any grown man who is squicked out by menstruation needs to go back to kindergarten :P
posted by supermedusa at 4:06 PM on January 7, 2016
posted by supermedusa at 4:06 PM on January 7, 2016
Magical moon goddess earth mother menstruation (what a mouthful!) is one of those strange topics where I have only heard people complaining about it - but never the supposed period-positivity.
Is this really a thing?
I do know one woman whose mother threw her a "moontime" party when she got her first period. Like, actually sent invites (to older female family members and family friends, not to the poor kid's school friends or anything) that said "Come celebrate with us, for <friendname> has had her moontime". She says that the gathering was every bit as mortifying as you might imagine.
I don't know if it's a common thing among all people, but I can say for sure that it has happened at least that one time.
posted by IAmUnaware at 4:16 PM on January 7, 2016
Is this really a thing?
I do know one woman whose mother threw her a "moontime" party when she got her first period. Like, actually sent invites (to older female family members and family friends, not to the poor kid's school friends or anything) that said "Come celebrate with us, for <friendname> has had her moontime". She says that the gathering was every bit as mortifying as you might imagine.
I don't know if it's a common thing among all people, but I can say for sure that it has happened at least that one time.
posted by IAmUnaware at 4:16 PM on January 7, 2016
Magical moon goddess earth mother menstruation (what a mouthful!) is one of those strange topics where I have only heard people complaining about it - but never the supposed period-positivity. Is this really a thing?
Among certain clusters of new-agey hippie women-empowerment groups, yeah. (You know the feminist bookstore owners on Portlandia? They'd be like this, and yes, there are people like that.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:29 PM on January 7, 2016
Among certain clusters of new-agey hippie women-empowerment groups, yeah. (You know the feminist bookstore owners on Portlandia? They'd be like this, and yes, there are people like that.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:29 PM on January 7, 2016
that attitude is a reaction to the way menstruation is treated, and the way people who menstruate are still denied opportunities today because of it. it's not my personal path, but i understand the impulse to try to reclaim the thing that has been so stigmatized.
posted by nadawi at 4:37 PM on January 7, 2016 [14 favorites]
posted by nadawi at 4:37 PM on January 7, 2016 [14 favorites]
Seriously, fellow male-identifying sorts: when you act like periods are disgusting, hideous things, to the point where you won't even handle a shrink-wrapped box of tampons, you look like a childish jackass to everybody around you.
Along this crawl before they run spectrum, I'll attest to two surprising discoveries...
Several British men I've known have asserted its discussion among other men was indecorous, so, that was a level of immaturity beyond puerile. American men I've known dismiss sex during a period as weak or pandering or desperate, and I've known some women who say period sex isn't so desired, yet I've known a few women with intense menstrual cramps for which sex provided greater relief than aspirin, pamprin, etc. You put down a towel and deal with it.
I mention the American/British distinction because two videos serially posted above irked me a little. I love Kids In the Hall, but I think that video fails to engage insight so much as perpetuate titters-- which isn't right or wrong and a process of engagement--while #Chunks rocks it hard.
posted by lazycomputerkids at 4:51 PM on January 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
Along this crawl before they run spectrum, I'll attest to two surprising discoveries...
Several British men I've known have asserted its discussion among other men was indecorous, so, that was a level of immaturity beyond puerile. American men I've known dismiss sex during a period as weak or pandering or desperate, and I've known some women who say period sex isn't so desired, yet I've known a few women with intense menstrual cramps for which sex provided greater relief than aspirin, pamprin, etc. You put down a towel and deal with it.
I mention the American/British distinction because two videos serially posted above irked me a little. I love Kids In the Hall, but I think that video fails to engage insight so much as perpetuate titters-- which isn't right or wrong and a process of engagement--while #Chunks rocks it hard.
posted by lazycomputerkids at 4:51 PM on January 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
oh man, i've only found (american) men who love period sex and i have to be the one to be all "no, i swear this isn't about ick factor or shame or blood, but i swear to god if you bring that thing near me this week i'm tearing it off."
posted by nadawi at 5:02 PM on January 7, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by nadawi at 5:02 PM on January 7, 2016 [7 favorites]
Did someone say Moontime Party? (YTL)
And now I'm rereading the relevent Connie Willis short story "Even the Queen," which won the Hugo, Nebula, and Locus Awards for Best Short Story in '93. It's an SF short story in a world where the period is optional thanks to a new medical shunt, but the moon goddess types are still around, and, I've got to say, sound very familiar even though this short story is old enough to buy beer.
posted by Sunburnt at 5:40 PM on January 7, 2016 [6 favorites]
And now I'm rereading the relevent Connie Willis short story "Even the Queen," which won the Hugo, Nebula, and Locus Awards for Best Short Story in '93. It's an SF short story in a world where the period is optional thanks to a new medical shunt, but the moon goddess types are still around, and, I've got to say, sound very familiar even though this short story is old enough to buy beer.
posted by Sunburnt at 5:40 PM on January 7, 2016 [6 favorites]
Hint to "Manly Men": tampons are great for stopping blood from flowing from holes in your body. If you're a paranoid dweeb that can't "man up" enough to be seen buying tampons for your lady friend, just go with the excuse that you're putting them in your gun bag or first aid kit; because you know, people actually do that too.
Tampons are actually a cheap and effective way to clean a shotgun barrel. I've bought tampons for this one specific task.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 6:13 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
Tampons are actually a cheap and effective way to clean a shotgun barrel. I've bought tampons for this one specific task.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 6:13 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
To this day, I never understood why anyone would consider anything about the menstrual process to be gross at all.
Emphasis mine. I can help with this.
First, a disclaimer: I'm a person who menstruates, and I am a person who dates women. Periods don't gross me out on either one of those levels. But let me entertain you with a little anecdote.
I had a long-term relationship (waaaay too long-term) with a woman who considered herself an anarchist and who bridled at anything she perceived as someone trying to exercise authority over her. Her "feminine hygiene" [ick] product of choice was those washable cotton "moon" pads. She washed them by soaking them. In a clear pyrex bowl with a lid. In the bathroom. In plain sight.
So look, the menstrual process itself isn't gross, but a clear pyrex bowl full of bloody water in the bathroom IS FUCKING GROSS. I repeatedly asked that she find an alternative, less visible method for soaking those rags, which triggered the anarchist in her and led to accusations of my being too controlling.
When it was clear that she wasn't going to stop doing it, I started covering the bowl up with a kitchen towel so I at least wouldn't have to look at it. So, there's that.
The second issue was that this pyrex bowl was one that was stored in the kitchen. We did not have dishwasher. After the rag soak, she'd hand wash the bowl and put it back in the cupboard. I had a problem with that, and refused to eat out of that bowl. Standards, you know?
So, my parents were visiting this one time. The ex asked what she could do to help with dinner. I asked her to make a salad. And then later I spot that salad on the dinner table in that pyrex bowl, and it was like OH HELL NO.
TLDR: The menstrual process itself is natural and fine and not gross. But there are definitely ways to make it gross and there are definitely lines that can be crossed. There is the equivalent of 'traif' when it comes to menstruation and food service.
posted by mudpuppie at 7:22 PM on January 7, 2016 [12 favorites]
Emphasis mine. I can help with this.
First, a disclaimer: I'm a person who menstruates, and I am a person who dates women. Periods don't gross me out on either one of those levels. But let me entertain you with a little anecdote.
I had a long-term relationship (waaaay too long-term) with a woman who considered herself an anarchist and who bridled at anything she perceived as someone trying to exercise authority over her. Her "feminine hygiene" [ick] product of choice was those washable cotton "moon" pads. She washed them by soaking them. In a clear pyrex bowl with a lid. In the bathroom. In plain sight.
So look, the menstrual process itself isn't gross, but a clear pyrex bowl full of bloody water in the bathroom IS FUCKING GROSS. I repeatedly asked that she find an alternative, less visible method for soaking those rags, which triggered the anarchist in her and led to accusations of my being too controlling.
When it was clear that she wasn't going to stop doing it, I started covering the bowl up with a kitchen towel so I at least wouldn't have to look at it. So, there's that.
The second issue was that this pyrex bowl was one that was stored in the kitchen. We did not have dishwasher. After the rag soak, she'd hand wash the bowl and put it back in the cupboard. I had a problem with that, and refused to eat out of that bowl. Standards, you know?
So, my parents were visiting this one time. The ex asked what she could do to help with dinner. I asked her to make a salad. And then later I spot that salad on the dinner table in that pyrex bowl, and it was like OH HELL NO.
TLDR: The menstrual process itself is natural and fine and not gross. But there are definitely ways to make it gross and there are definitely lines that can be crossed. There is the equivalent of 'traif' when it comes to menstruation and food service.
posted by mudpuppie at 7:22 PM on January 7, 2016 [12 favorites]
tampons also make great firestarters!
posted by dinty_moore at 7:24 PM on January 7, 2016
posted by dinty_moore at 7:24 PM on January 7, 2016
Thanks for all the insights and stories! I just watched all the videos posted in this thread. I fully expect my youtube tomorrow to be full of periods.
Most menstrual conversations I've had with my female friends have been about how awful they feel or how much pain they're in. I can only offer sympathy. Only my best friend so far have actually described her flow, but I imagine that's not something most women share even with other women. Like quaking fajita said, it's probably like describing your boogers to someone else. You'd have to be pretty close to the person. But then again, I've never been included in two women talking about their periods, so I'm not sure.
posted by numaner at 7:26 PM on January 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
Most menstrual conversations I've had with my female friends have been about how awful they feel or how much pain they're in. I can only offer sympathy. Only my best friend so far have actually described her flow, but I imagine that's not something most women share even with other women. Like quaking fajita said, it's probably like describing your boogers to someone else. You'd have to be pretty close to the person. But then again, I've never been included in two women talking about their periods, so I'm not sure.
posted by numaner at 7:26 PM on January 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
when you act like periods are disgusting, hideous things, to the point where you won't even handle a shrink-wrapped box of tampons, you look like a childish jackass to everybody around you.
Yes, but my wife also doesn't like it if I yell down the aisle, "hey, do you need more of these? I think you're almost out!" Then proudly carry it around the store, toss it up and down, set it down on the free sample table for a minute, etc.
posted by ctmf at 7:26 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yes, but my wife also doesn't like it if I yell down the aisle, "hey, do you need more of these? I think you're almost out!" Then proudly carry it around the store, toss it up and down, set it down on the free sample table for a minute, etc.
posted by ctmf at 7:26 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
I think periods and pads/tampons should find their place in society on the levels of poop and toilet papers. It's funny when you point things out about them for jokes. But in general, no one should look twice when anyone carries around a box of tampons. It's just a thing that happens to half the population. NBD. Just like the other half needs to wear cups for sports.
posted by numaner at 7:32 PM on January 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by numaner at 7:32 PM on January 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
I've found that menses blood is much less gross to me since I started using a menstruel cup. It doesn't oxygenate or start to smell, as it does in pads. It's just like blood: bright red. Kind of pretty, actually.
posted by jb at 7:39 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by jb at 7:39 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
i want to go and dm every single one of them about the demons...
That thread was so much more entertaining when I realized that at least one dude seriously thought that women had cloacas, and that maybe he was secretly a bird.
It did take me an embarrassingly long time to figure out the whole vaginal secretion thing. It wasn't covered in the puberty videos I watched in school, and I certainly didn't learn it from my parents. Thank god for the internet.
posted by muddgirl at 8:28 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
That thread was so much more entertaining when I realized that at least one dude seriously thought that women had cloacas, and that maybe he was secretly a bird.
It did take me an embarrassingly long time to figure out the whole vaginal secretion thing. It wasn't covered in the puberty videos I watched in school, and I certainly didn't learn it from my parents. Thank god for the internet.
posted by muddgirl at 8:28 PM on January 7, 2016 [5 favorites]
The final 5-6 years of my period up to perimenopause have been a fucking shitshow, occasionally requiring a mop, plunger, shower, and laundry at 3am. It was - and still occasionally is, like a horrible surprise - disgusting. But I get to say so, because it's my bathroom rug.
I feel like we'd all be better off if we could normalize the entire spectrum of experiences, from "beautiful moon power" to "staying home from work with a migraine and unable to stand up straight" so that disgusting is just one of the completely legitimate manifestations.
The reason it's such a big dumb deal among the men of certain cultures is the complete mystery of sex and reproduction. That vaginal secretion issue is sort of a scary big deal when you realize that some men gauge sexual readiness by whether or not it's paper-dry in there.
posted by Lyn Never at 8:33 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
I feel like we'd all be better off if we could normalize the entire spectrum of experiences, from "beautiful moon power" to "staying home from work with a migraine and unable to stand up straight" so that disgusting is just one of the completely legitimate manifestations.
The reason it's such a big dumb deal among the men of certain cultures is the complete mystery of sex and reproduction. That vaginal secretion issue is sort of a scary big deal when you realize that some men gauge sexual readiness by whether or not it's paper-dry in there.
posted by Lyn Never at 8:33 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
Ygritte: What's swooning?
Jon: ... Fainting.
Ygritte: What's fainting?
Jon: When a girl sees blood and collapses.
Ygritte: Why would a girl see blood and collapse?
Jon: Well... Not all girls are like you.
Ygritte: Girls see more blood than boys.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 9:10 PM on January 7, 2016 [15 favorites]
Jon: ... Fainting.
Ygritte: What's fainting?
Jon: When a girl sees blood and collapses.
Ygritte: Why would a girl see blood and collapse?
Jon: Well... Not all girls are like you.
Ygritte: Girls see more blood than boys.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 9:10 PM on January 7, 2016 [15 favorites]
Yeah, menstruation and poop are just not on the same gross level, sorry. I've regularly used diva cups, sponges, and reusable pads, all of which need to be washed by hand. But there's no way in hell I'd be washing a dirty diaper by hand. I agree that touching someones else's blood is arguably gross and potentially dangerous. But seeing it? I cannot for the life of me figure out why people think seeing menstrual blood is gross. It's one thing if all blood makes you faint. Ok, weak stomach. But *just* menstrual blood? I think you've got to have some screwed up views of women parts to only get grossed out when blood comes out of a vagina.
posted by greermahoney at 9:48 PM on January 7, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by greermahoney at 9:48 PM on January 7, 2016 [4 favorites]
I winced at "literally every woman does this" because, uh, that's not true whatsoever for a variety of reasons and the line could have been written "pretty much every woman does this" and delivered the same way to the exact same effect. But the escalating satire won me back over eventually. I lost it at "the teeth" [chatter chatter].
I'm not a person who is tremendously free and easy about talking about my own bodily functions in casual conversation, but have increasingly been consciously made a point to bring up my period unembarassedly the same way I would bring up other comparable body things. After all, I've got comfortable, polite and not-gross language to note that I'm having sinus issues, or that I have to pee, or that I'm bleeding from a cut.
posted by desuetude at 10:53 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
I'm not a person who is tremendously free and easy about talking about my own bodily functions in casual conversation, but have increasingly been consciously made a point to bring up my period unembarassedly the same way I would bring up other comparable body things. After all, I've got comfortable, polite and not-gross language to note that I'm having sinus issues, or that I have to pee, or that I'm bleeding from a cut.
posted by desuetude at 10:53 PM on January 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
The social expectations surrounding menstruation are weird. My wife is actually more grossed out by menstruation than I am (actually, she has problems with blood in general), and she actually expects me to be more grossed out about it than she is. She's all "Back away, I'm going to toss this gross thing!, and I'm all "Okaaay..."
posted by happyroach at 11:10 PM on January 7, 2016
posted by happyroach at 11:10 PM on January 7, 2016
That thread was so much more entertaining when I realized that at least one dude seriously thought that women had cloacas, and that maybe he was secretly a bird.
It's not just men, thanks to abstainence-only sex education! (via) What's the most simple thing you've ever had to explain to a fully competent adult? (self.AskReddit)
posted by sebastienbailard at 2:14 AM on January 8, 2016
It's not just men, thanks to abstainence-only sex education! (via) What's the most simple thing you've ever had to explain to a fully competent adult? (self.AskReddit)
posted by sebastienbailard at 2:14 AM on January 8, 2016
It seems the same but different conversation you hear from women who are icked out over semen, from people who are raised with the lesson that our bodies in general and anything sexual in particular is bad and mysterious and dirty and shameful.
posted by InkaLomax at 5:24 AM on January 8, 2016
posted by InkaLomax at 5:24 AM on January 8, 2016
It seems the same but different conversation you hear from women who are icked out over semen
Conversely, many men who are icked out over menstrual blood react with wide-eyed disbelief that anyone could be so prissy as to refuse a mouthful of jizz.
posted by billiebee at 5:59 AM on January 8, 2016 [13 favorites]
Conversely, many men who are icked out over menstrual blood react with wide-eyed disbelief that anyone could be so prissy as to refuse a mouthful of jizz.
posted by billiebee at 5:59 AM on January 8, 2016 [13 favorites]
Conversely, many men who are icked out over menstrual blood react with wide-eyed disbelief that anyone could be so prissy as to refuse a mouthful of jizz.
But kissing after would be gross, of course.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:36 AM on January 8, 2016 [4 favorites]
But kissing after would be gross, of course.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:36 AM on January 8, 2016 [4 favorites]
This was cute and well done. Love the Adam Ruins Everything cast members.
posted by kinnakeet at 7:13 AM on January 8, 2016
posted by kinnakeet at 7:13 AM on January 8, 2016
Preparing food with period blood (or, okay, semen) on your hands? A little gross, but it probably won't make you sick.
The part of me that came of sexual age at an urban college during the HIV-AWARENESS-A-GOGO early 90's is raising a skeptical eyebrow at this. I mean, fecal matter is definitely more of a problem, but I suspect that there may be some blood-borne illnesses as well...
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:23 AM on January 8, 2016
The part of me that came of sexual age at an urban college during the HIV-AWARENESS-A-GOGO early 90's is raising a skeptical eyebrow at this. I mean, fecal matter is definitely more of a problem, but I suspect that there may be some blood-borne illnesses as well...
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:23 AM on January 8, 2016
To this day, I never understood why anyone would consider anything about the menstrual process to be gross at all.
I find this sentiment really annoying and minimizing of what some of us feel. I have had heavy periods lately, and the sensation and dealing-with of large clots slithering out of my body is fucking disgusting, and if you can't understand that, its cool, but you really don't have to act like people who DO find it gross are being unreasonable. I have a right to be grossed out by things my body does, and it doesn't make me more aligned with the patriarchy or anything.
posted by agregoli at 7:40 AM on January 8, 2016 [18 favorites]
I find this sentiment really annoying and minimizing of what some of us feel. I have had heavy periods lately, and the sensation and dealing-with of large clots slithering out of my body is fucking disgusting, and if you can't understand that, its cool, but you really don't have to act like people who DO find it gross are being unreasonable. I have a right to be grossed out by things my body does, and it doesn't make me more aligned with the patriarchy or anything.
posted by agregoli at 7:40 AM on January 8, 2016 [18 favorites]
It may bear mentioning that there are also scales of grossed-out-ness. There's a big difference between a momentary "ew" right before you suck it up and do something, and jumping back and screaming "OOOOOH NOOOOOOO GROSS ICKY GET THAT AWAY FROM ME" and noping out of the room altogether.
Those in this thread who do report finding the menstrual process to be gross are probably closer to the momentary-ew end of the spectrum, and the tut-tutting about "why do men find this to be so gross" are probably talking more about guys who are reacting closer to the "ooooh noooo" shrieking end of the spectrum.
Me, I just tend to ironically and sarcastically sing "I enjoy being a girl...." to myself whenever I'm forced to clean up after anything particularly charnel-housey.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:22 AM on January 8, 2016 [4 favorites]
Those in this thread who do report finding the menstrual process to be gross are probably closer to the momentary-ew end of the spectrum, and the tut-tutting about "why do men find this to be so gross" are probably talking more about guys who are reacting closer to the "ooooh noooo" shrieking end of the spectrum.
Me, I just tend to ironically and sarcastically sing "I enjoy being a girl...." to myself whenever I'm forced to clean up after anything particularly charnel-housey.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:22 AM on January 8, 2016 [4 favorites]
Magical moon goddess earth mother menstruation (what a mouthful!) is one of those strange topics where I have only heard people complaining about it - but never the supposed period-positivity. Is this really a thing?
Two sisters I went to high school with were encouraged by their mother to make paintings from their first menstrual blood. Those paintings were framed and hung in their home.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:26 AM on January 8, 2016 [1 favorite]
Two sisters I went to high school with were encouraged by their mother to make paintings from their first menstrual blood. Those paintings were framed and hung in their home.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:26 AM on January 8, 2016 [1 favorite]
Yeah, I don't think it's a traitor to the cause to acknowledge that having your period can be physically unpleasant, and that blood in general is often considered to be a somewhat icky substance.
The problem is that the shame and disgust around menstruation is wildly disproportionate for for a bunch of sexist reasons, including weirdly hypocritical willful ignorance by men about female anatomy, which leads right down the path of "this body function of yours alarms me, and I don't understand how you deal with it, which makes me feel insecure, so it's your fault for being gross."
posted by desuetude at 10:16 AM on January 8, 2016 [6 favorites]
The problem is that the shame and disgust around menstruation is wildly disproportionate for for a bunch of sexist reasons, including weirdly hypocritical willful ignorance by men about female anatomy, which leads right down the path of "this body function of yours alarms me, and I don't understand how you deal with it, which makes me feel insecure, so it's your fault for being gross."
posted by desuetude at 10:16 AM on January 8, 2016 [6 favorites]
I'm a little late, but I wanted to give mudpuppie's long comment the response it deserved, which is aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
posted by Countess Elena at 12:06 PM on January 9, 2016
posted by Countess Elena at 12:06 PM on January 9, 2016
Only my best friend so far have actually described her flow, but I imagine that's not something most women share even with other women.
I haven't had many conversations with friend-friends about this, but I have found that groups of people who have recently had a baby (or, more correctly, had a pregnancy) have these conversations a lot. Because periods can be waaaaay different after pregnancy than they were before, and no one tells you that.
posted by naturesgreatestmiracle at 3:40 PM on January 9, 2016
I haven't had many conversations with friend-friends about this, but I have found that groups of people who have recently had a baby (or, more correctly, had a pregnancy) have these conversations a lot. Because periods can be waaaaay different after pregnancy than they were before, and no one tells you that.
posted by naturesgreatestmiracle at 3:40 PM on January 9, 2016
« Older I like to think that Family Guy would be The... | Blood-Bought Sweets Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by Pope Guilty at 12:52 PM on January 7, 2016 [53 favorites]