Comments on: Comments on 15628

Post number 15628

headspace — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 03:13:38 -0800

Damned if you do, damned if you're dead. If families don't purchase an expensive urn for cremated remains, require them to purchase a $45 temporary container. But be sure to stamp it "Temporary Container" on all four sides, advises one industry newsletter. The funeral industry may not be making any friends, but they're making a boatload of money. The Funeral Consumers Alliance would like to help them make a little less.

By: raaka

raaka — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 03:51:47 -0800

See also: The American Way of Death, At Your Disposal: The Funeral Industry Prepares for Boom Times, Last Rites morior ergo sum

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 05:01:56 -0800

For the other side of the coin, see Thomas Lynch's books on "Life in the Dismal Trade." Believe me, you'd rather be selling cars.

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 05:06:06 -0800

Even better link.

By: MrBaliHai

MrBaliHai — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 06:01:28 -0800

cremated remains As I discovered when my step-father passed away, the actual funeral industry term is cremains. For some reason, this made me think of coffee creamer. "Would you like some Creamains[tm] with your coffee?"

By: quonsar

quonsar — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 06:14:12 -0800

for maximum profitability one dumps the remains in the field out back and places concrete dust in the temporary container. some people are just born businessmen!

By: Grangousier

Grangousier — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 06:14:14 -0800

Thomas Lynch... Wow. I really have to get that book. Thanks, Coldchef.

By: jennyb

jennyb — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 07:05:07 -0800

I used to work at a memorial park/funeral sales office as a telemarketer (yes, I know, I'm going to hell). I made the calls from a room lined with shelves that held pre-purhcased, empty urns. Each urn was labeled with an index card printed with the intended recipients name. I quit after about a month, and the park's managers were eventually indicted for a few counts of fraud. The head guy, manager or director or something, actually confided in me that he had multiple social security numbers and driver's licenses from different states with different names on them. But he also used photoshop to paste his head onto photos of people standing next to various state officials, autographed and framed them, and hung them on the wall of the reception area, utterly convinced that no one would know any different. So he could have been lying. Life in the Dismal Trade is a wonderful book. I myself have looked into a career as a mortician. I think it would be neat.

By: rcade

rcade — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 07:33:40 -0800

I smell the handiwork of the Kroehner Service Corporation.

By: briank

briank — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 08:09:43 -0800

As previously discussed here last fall...

By: clavdivs

clavdivs — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 08:59:53 -0800

coldchef: Lynch is a hellava nice guy..."breakfast of champions" go reread the book.(still rather sell cars) I consider him michigans finest poet. he is well thought of in U.K. I have an uncle in the monument business (hes even sold markers to Lynch) and the prices are high. But a fair dealer wont jip you. Federal law requires one to have a certain type of container for ashes...i'd imagine some greedy people are just cashing in.

By: laz-e-boy

laz-e-boy — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 09:51:27 -0800

I really like Muslim burials. Just wrap the deceased in a cloth and bury 'em within 24 hours. No expensive treatments, no lavish casket.

By: zpousman

zpousman — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 10:04:19 -0800

same with jews. no muss, no fuss. pine boxes only.

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 10:42:52 -0800

And now, the tale of Morose Marvin.

By: bingo

bingo — Tue, 19 Mar 2002 11:01:32 -0800

Although, at the Jewish funerals I've been to, there was a sort of metal coffin shell around the wooden coffin. A clump of dirt is put onto the internal coffin before it's closed in. And the coffin was more than a simple pine box, too. It may have been made of pine, but it was carved and stuff. Maybe this is a degree-of-religiousness thing.