Oh, Seattle! in comic form
January 30, 2016 11:52 AM Subscribe
Seattle alt-paper The Stranger carries comic-strip renditions of real police reports by Callan Berry. Recent pieces include: Man Throws Boasts (and Roasts) in Elevator, Woman Gets Cut in Line, Uses Peppery Language, and Man Gives Friend a Beer, Fight Ensues.
Meanwhile, Real Change features MetroFareComic by Peter Orr, affectionate pieces based on real bus rider experiences, such as the overheard new lips prayer and misheard pothead genocide.
Based upon these comics it seems I should hope to never be in a situation after which I am given an SPD business card.
posted by mikhuang at 11:57 AM on January 30, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by mikhuang at 11:57 AM on January 30, 2016 [12 favorites]
The Skateboarding Shoplifter was one of the few casefile principals who didn't merit an SPD card?
I think that alone merits an SPD card.
posted by Smart Dalek at 12:22 PM on January 30, 2016
I think that alone merits an SPD card.
posted by Smart Dalek at 12:22 PM on January 30, 2016
Do you think at some point the senior members of the SPD sat down and said 'We're never going to be able to address most of these crimes, how about we make our key performance indicator to be giving out SPD business cards?'.
posted by biffa at 12:35 PM on January 30, 2016 [10 favorites]
posted by biffa at 12:35 PM on January 30, 2016 [10 favorites]
These are awesome!
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 12:41 PM on January 30, 2016
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 12:41 PM on January 30, 2016
paddlin' the school canoe, you better believe that's an SPD card.
posted by Rev. Syung Myung Me at 12:41 PM on January 30, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by Rev. Syung Myung Me at 12:41 PM on January 30, 2016 [5 favorites]
I still have Police Log Comics in my RSS feed even though it hasn't been updated in years.
posted by Drab_Parts at 12:47 PM on January 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Drab_Parts at 12:47 PM on January 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
lol these are hilarious. And being given a SPD business card sounds kinda ominous.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:17 PM on January 30, 2016
posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:17 PM on January 30, 2016
Ok some are kinda horrible but still.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:19 PM on January 30, 2016
posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:19 PM on January 30, 2016
Thrown cups of coffee, random pepper spraying, kicks in the head in lieu of shooting, apparently the SPD isn't concerned with any violence short of death? Or, apparently punching a guy who was walking a dog, I have to give them that one.
posted by JHarris at 1:31 PM on January 30, 2016
posted by JHarris at 1:31 PM on January 30, 2016
Sometimes, you just gotta let the tantrum out.
posted by Existential Dread at 1:42 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Existential Dread at 1:42 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
An SPD card has the responding officer's name, contact number, and the case report number written on it.
posted by P.o.B. at 1:51 PM on January 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by P.o.B. at 1:51 PM on January 30, 2016 [4 favorites]
Existential Dread: I have been in that situation as a distance runner in the city MANY times. In that situation, you might have been waiting a few miles to find a suitable coffee shop. Way worse than being a biker.
Still: ordering food without any intention of paying seems like it's over the line.
posted by billjings at 2:00 PM on January 30, 2016
Still: ordering food without any intention of paying seems like it's over the line.
posted by billjings at 2:00 PM on January 30, 2016
Well, that's not creepy at all.
In that case? I wouldn't doubt that the guy actually said "I'll take care of it later" or something like that. But you have a better chance of getting the police to go after someone who didn't pay your $4 bathroom usage fee if you make it sound as menacing as you can.
posted by JHarris at 2:01 PM on January 30, 2016
In that case? I wouldn't doubt that the guy actually said "I'll take care of it later" or something like that. But you have a better chance of getting the police to go after someone who didn't pay your $4 bathroom usage fee if you make it sound as menacing as you can.
posted by JHarris at 2:01 PM on January 30, 2016
But you have a better chance of getting the police to go after someone who didn't pay your $4 bathroom usage fee if you make it sound as menacing as you can.
Or maybe she misheard him or he misspoke?
posted by teponaztli at 2:36 PM on January 30, 2016
Or maybe she misheard him or he misspoke?
posted by teponaztli at 2:36 PM on January 30, 2016
The use of "plundered" as an action makes the pirate one perfect.
posted by graymouser at 3:35 PM on January 30, 2016
posted by graymouser at 3:35 PM on January 30, 2016
Some are horrible, like theold black man arrested for using a golf club as a cane.
Or the white woman taunting the black officer.
Still, appreciate Callan's way of highlighting the absurd.
posted by Omnomnom at 3:37 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
Or the white woman taunting the black officer.
Still, appreciate Callan's way of highlighting the absurd.
posted by Omnomnom at 3:37 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
I have 3 SPD cards. One was years ago when we were hosting a July 4th party and some yahoos were shooting fireworks. Another I was driving down Aurora home from a friends at one am and stopped for some tacos, got in the car and spilled one all over myself, swerving into the next lane. Yes, that was me taking a sobriety test on the side of Aurora at one am (thank Jebus I was actually sober), a proud moment in my life. The third involved heavy heavy amounts of alcohol and property damage and is best not discussed, but they escorted me home and gave my wife a card in case she had any problems. She continues to threaten me with it.
I am well aware that any of these situations could have ended very differently if I were not white.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 5:15 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
I am well aware that any of these situations could have ended very differently if I were not white.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 5:15 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
I live in Seattle and have been reading the police report comics for a few months now. I always appreciate the little touches of animation in the webcomic versions.
posted by matildaben at 5:45 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by matildaben at 5:45 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
Still: ordering food without any intention of paying seems like it's over the line.
was it sushi?
posted by ennui.bz at 6:10 PM on January 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
was it sushi?
posted by ennui.bz at 6:10 PM on January 30, 2016 [2 favorites]
Not quite the zen-like absurdity of Police Log Comics (my two physical copies of the books are permanent fixtures in the water closet reading rack), but always amusing. Even if they remind me a little too much of work.
posted by Scattercat at 6:41 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Scattercat at 6:41 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]
Now I know what would happen if I ever said anything to the army of line-cutting little old ladies in my neighborhood.
posted by lagomorphius at 8:06 PM on January 30, 2016
posted by lagomorphius at 8:06 PM on January 30, 2016
Well, that's not creepy at all.
The combination of the thing the guy is reported to have said and the artwork (slitted eyes, super wide mouth, reminds me of Attack on Titan) is what did it. Effective!
posted by Existential Dread at 8:57 PM on January 30, 2016
The combination of the thing the guy is reported to have said and the artwork (slitted eyes, super wide mouth, reminds me of Attack on Titan) is what did it. Effective!
posted by Existential Dread at 8:57 PM on January 30, 2016
I love the little details like the coffeeshop menu and the signs on the c-store counter that say "smoke," "drink," and "gamble."
I also find it amusing how many of these incidents involve coffee! Seattle, eh?
posted by mama casserole at 6:12 PM on January 31, 2016
I also find it amusing how many of these incidents involve coffee! Seattle, eh?
posted by mama casserole at 6:12 PM on January 31, 2016
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Misread this as 'in comic sans.'
posted by fizzix at 11:54 AM on January 30, 2016