Living with a Redneck Neighbor.

March 23, 2002 3:25 PM

Living with a Redneck Neighbor. What happens when a Vietnamese redneck moves in next door? You log all of his quirks and disasters (including setting the entire garden on fire) and put it all up on your Web site, of course! Complete with pictures.
posted by wackybrit (39 comments total)

what patience that guy has...I'm fairly certain I would have lost it very quickly...just goes to show you that rednecks come in all colors, shapes, and sizes....funny
posted by ayukna at 3:57 PM on March 23, 2002

"Feeling extremely patriotic for his American neighbors (remember, Phong Lee is from Vietnam), Phong Lee decides to put up an American flag in front of his house."

I think the site is funny 'n all. But I don't really understand that comment. Why shouldn't people feel just as proud of their new country as the one they are originally from? So the flag probably wasn't for "his American neighbours" Or at least not solely so, it was probably for himself his family.

Having said that, it's a funny site. I can sympathise. I used to live next door to a family that had some very similar ideas regarding home furnishings. They decorated their house with thousands of stuffed toys, and hung Christmas tinsel from the ceiling. Their karaoke machine was in constant use. Chicken wire was used to great effect in the garden, originally intended as the support for the various climbing plants they planted and forgot about, but the plants could never catch up, they didn't have a hope.
posted by lucien at 4:30 PM on March 23, 2002

Thanks for the link, that is hilarious!
posted by homunculus at 4:33 PM on March 23, 2002

What happens when a Vietnamese redneck moves in next door?

You get a new TV sitcom!! My Vietmese Neighbor and Me! On Fox next fall.
posted by geoff. at 4:38 PM on March 23, 2002

Well, it's not your typical NewsFilter post, not from CNN, the Atlantic, Slashdot or the Free Republic: rodii tested and passed! ;P
posted by y2karl at 4:48 PM on March 23, 2002

I posted it because it made me cry with laughter, and that's a good MeFi post prerequisite IMHO! Check out the bit where Phong Lee set fire to his entire garden, wtf is that about??

I think everyone can relate to 'neighbor' stories. Where we used to live, we had a devout Christian as a neighbour. For the six years we lived there, we called him 'Ned'.. as in Ned Flanders. They also had two kids who were like Rod and Todd, so it fit. I can't go into any of the hilarious episodes right here.

(I failed to mention I originally got the link from Angela's great TrippySwell so I guess that deserves a mention.)
posted by wackybrit at 5:03 PM on March 23, 2002

Jeez, don't get me started on neighbours.
Chuffin big gardens in that neighbourhood. How the hell do I emigrate to the U.S?
posted by Fat Buddha at 5:16 PM on March 23, 2002

Hilarious link, Wackybrit. Thanks a bunch. My parents had a neighbor of this same kind, although not nearly so ambitious. He only set his stove on fire. I'm afraid I cannot recall their nationality, it has been a few years.
About the funniest things were the twice weekly visits of Somebody's Grandmother, a real battle axe type who utterly refused to permit her progeny any yard decoration that violated her chosen theme: Scorched Earth.
The wife would have a few flowers--a small attempt at some color--sitting forlornly in the middle of the denuded patch of dirt that takes the place of a normal lawn and Grandmother would be out there with a rake inside of 3 seconds of arriving, mashing them into the soil with a vengeance until no speck of color remained. Just pulling them up was unacceptable. They had to be Destroyed.
Neighbors. Go figure.
posted by eszetela at 6:50 PM on March 23, 2002

For those of you in the UK, did anyone else notice that Carlos is a dead ringer for Jeremy Spake from Airport?
posted by wackybrit at 7:04 PM on March 23, 2002

While it was pretty funny reading, I can't help thinking what a total dick the author is.

This feels completely exploitative, no matter how comedic the neighbor's antics are. I've had dozens of obnoxious, ridiculous neighbors, but that's their life, and it's not my place to talk about them, I certainly wouldn't want them talking about me.

A part of me is hoping for a reverse backlash where we can read about Carlos Rodriguez's life next.
posted by joemaller at 7:05 PM on March 23, 2002

It's nice to see bigotry out in the open:

By now, my wife and I have come up with a name for our neighbor (Phong Lee). I know it sounds very stereotypical but hey, I'm a minority too.

By now, my wife and I are glued to the window hoping to see a little Rodney King action (yeah it's bad).

It becomes evident that the cop has mentioned somebody is going to jail because the entire Lee household is out of the house frantically apologizing, bowing, and trying to shake my hand - We ahr berry sahree. We aparagize, mistah, prease!

It seems to me that there is enough material to present the neighbor as a punchline without insulting his ethnicity.

I just didn't find the site funny, and these comments really soured the whole thing for me.
posted by JDC8 at 8:01 PM on March 23, 2002

Right. Seeing as how I love Vietnam, I feel sort of ill at the moment.
posted by aramaic at 8:43 PM on March 23, 2002

I'm starting to think this is less about the Vietnamese neighbor than it is about Columbus, GA. One of my oldest friends is a military spouse who had the unfortunate experience of living in military housing at Ft. Benning, GA, and everything I've read on this site so far reminds me of everything she's said about her ("no-account, low-rent, trifling") Columbus neighbors.

Perhaps the site author wasn't as well versed in satire as would be necessary so that this wouldn't come off as some long racist screed (because that's how it seems on the surface), but I'm almost willing to cut him/her a little slack. Almost.
posted by likorish at 9:01 PM on March 23, 2002

I just didn't find the site funny, and these comments really soured the whole thing for me.

Ditto. I thought it was boorish.
posted by lia at 9:38 PM on March 23, 2002

Ya, the guy does sound more than just a bit racist (understatement of the week there). If not for those comments, I'd think he'd have written about living next to a Red Green sort. I have relatives who tried the suburban farming bit, and can't build a structure to save their lives. I'm white, and so are they.
posted by Electric Elf at 9:48 PM on March 23, 2002

Wow. I'd hate to have this guy as a neighbor. I'm talking about the blogger, of course.
posted by Poagao at 9:57 PM on March 23, 2002

Ever have the kind of neighbor that makes you wonder if it's worth a 10-year blood feud if you pick up the phone to complain? This guy's lucky, his block-mate's an amusing harmless twit (I love that mailbox). If he'd just invite the family over for a cookout and some beers, I'm sure the late night home improvements would cease.

I'll bet that if the house was sold, he'd miss his neighbor.
posted by nikzhowz at 9:57 PM on March 23, 2002

I just didn't find the site funny, and these comments really soured the whole thing for me.

I thought it was boorish.

Which explains why you both read the entire website and all the comments. ;-P
posted by mischief at 10:04 PM on March 23, 2002

Hey--I try to be fair with my comments. Reading the whole site/article and the comments about it is my standard operation procedure before I add a post here.
posted by JDC8 at 10:52 PM on March 23, 2002

To be honest, I find this picture funnier than his writing. A lot. Here's hoping the neighbour strikes back.
posted by prolific at 12:28 AM on March 24, 2002

This guy goes on and on about his neighbor, but it looks as if it's the neighbor who wants to get the hell away from that place and its bigots and "friendly vandals" and style police. I suspect they made the Vietnamese family feel low and unwelcome instead of making friends with them and helping them with those mailboxes and fences and so on.
posted by pracowity at 2:06 AM on March 24, 2002

"For those of you in the UK, did anyone else notice that Carlos is a dead ringer for Jeremy Spake from Airport?"

Yeah kindof sortof. But not as much as his wife resembles a certain famous (read "infamous") Aussie.

Or at least a younger version of.
posted by lucien at 2:33 AM on March 24, 2002

When I was in college, we lived in a building. Right across us lived a gay teacher. We called him the CFAH (Crazy Fucker Across the Hall) because he'd take offense at our leaving garbage in the hall and singing stoopid Westlife songs at the top of our lungs in the middle of the night.

In retrospect maybe we were just being annoying to be annoying, but I think we really enjoyed it because we were closet bigots! (I'm over it now, feh.)

This blogger is hypersensitive because he's racist, tho--even with all his disclaimers!
posted by lillitot at 2:49 AM on March 24, 2002

When I was in college, we lived in a building. Right across us lived a gay teacher. We called him the CFAH (Crazy Fucker Across the Hall) because he'd take offense at our leaving garbage in the hall and singing stoopid Westlife songs at the top of our lungs in the middle of the night.

In retrospect maybe we were just being annoying to be annoying, but I think we really enjoyed it because we were closet bigots! (I'm over it now, feh.)

This blogger is hypersensitive because he's racist, tho--even with all his disclaimers!
posted by lillitot at 2:49 AM on March 24, 2002

> When I was in college, we lived in a building.

As opposed to what? What were you living in before? Are college kids living in tents or something now? I've been away too long.
posted by pracowity at 4:55 AM on March 24, 2002

Oops--pracowity: sorry for the waste of sarcasm. I should've explained that I live in the Philippines and most kids here live at home til they get married--hence the intro. It's not uncommon to dorm in college but it's not the usual practise to live in an apartment building either. :P
posted by lillitot at 5:04 AM on March 24, 2002

Oh, hell, I'll shut up now. The Philippines, eh?
posted by pracowity at 5:19 AM on March 24, 2002

I don't see any racism going on in the piece. I guess I am not very sensitive to these things, I think people should get over it.

I don't see how the 'We ahr berry sahree. We aparagize, mistah, prease!' is full-on racist. That's how they talked, and clearly demonstrates their proficiency in English. How else could you describe that without sounding like a dullard?

I do agree with pracowity though, the first person to make a valid 'anti' comment, IMHO.

I suspect they made the Vietnamese family feel low and unwelcome instead of making friends with them and helping them with those mailboxes and fences and so on.

This is just what happens nowadays. The 'Pleasantville' neighborhood is pretty much dead these days. A lot of people don't even bother to know who their neighbors are, and that leads to things like these. I can't speak though, I don't know my neighbors either!
posted by wackybrit at 5:41 AM on March 24, 2002

But Vietnamese don't mix up their r's and l's. That's (a stereotype of) Chinese, Koreans and Japanese. It's not accurate, it's a caricature, and a misplaced one at that. Are all Asians the same?

At least he didn't say "gook".
posted by rodii at 8:00 AM on March 24, 2002

rodii, Yes, Yes they are.

As an aside, I don't think Oriental Asians receive racial abuse in the same way that, say, those of African descent do. There are a lot of Oriental stereotypes, but they're no more offensive than the generally false stereotypes about the 'stupid Irish', the 'rude French' and the 'stiff-upper-lipped English'.

Somehow, Oriental Asians have thankfully avoided much of the abuse that those of African descent have had to face through the years, and even though some may make fun of the 'funny ways' of Oriental Asians (differences will always be celebrated or noticed), we invariably like them and welcome them into our communities.. whereas in many places in the world, those of African descent are not so lucky.. (You'll often find many Asians living in the English countryside, but not Blacks, I've seen two people in my county ever.)
posted by wackybrit at 8:40 AM on March 24, 2002

If it had been a white American-born redneck neighbor it would be OK to poke fun at his accent and other cultural quirks, I'm sure.
The blogger seemed fairly restrained in his response, considering all the disturbances--but he seemed to cut the Viets some slack, recognizing they weren't really bad people, just clueless. The smiles and apologies rather than a hostile response kept it from getting as ugly as it might have been.
I didn't find it funny because it reminded me of redneck neighbors I've had (but in most neighborhoods I've lived in, building codes and zoning restrictions are a non-issue). Try living next door to a redneck meth freak--no, don't. 'nuff said
Making fun of your neighbors on a website isn't something I can really applaud, but it's better this guy took out his frustrations online rather than throwing bricks through the "Lee's" backboard (I'm sure he had no idea who those "thugs" were). Sucks that the "Lees" felt unwelcome in the neighborhood--because they really do just seem clueless, not evil--and I'd hate to have a neighbor blogging about my efforts at home improvement, not that they have room to talk (We don't need no steenking building codes!).
Going to the lengths this weblogger did to chronicle the whole thing seems a little over the top to me. I didn't look at the pictures...pictures? OK, if you're going to go as far as the blogger did, I guess he needed to take pictures to demonstrate just how bad it is, but I'm damned if I'll take pictures of crap in my neighborhood I don't want to look at. It's great that the Web enables one to express oneself on any topic, but it's the whole project that seems suboptimal to me. But maybe the blogger feels a little of that sense of accomplishment Mr. Lee gets from his projects...well, far be it from me to throw bricks.
posted by StOne at 10:56 AM on March 24, 2002

Wisconsin rednecks.

With monster trucks.

And lesbian neighbors.
posted by NortonDC at 10:59 AM on March 24, 2002

direct link
posted by NortonDC at 11:11 AM on March 24, 2002

I'm smack-dab in the middle of a redneck neighborhood ("A lil' bit o'redneck right here on Long Island!"). I'll write about my neighbors only when they do something particuarly outstanding, like scream about their coke habits while standing in the middle of the street, at midnight, in front of our house -- my husband and I call it "Neighborhood Theatre."

I've never taken pictures, though -- probably never will -- but I was sorely tempted when my neighbor (different one than the coke guy) decorated his house for Halloween. He had a row of "ghosts" going up his driveway, which would have been fine, 'cept they looked more like mini-Klansmen. Swear. To. God...
posted by metrocake at 12:50 PM on March 24, 2002

hoohooo, ow, I had my wife and I in tears with this one, frankly it was just too funny, I wouldn't want anyone documenting my home improvement projects though...

Did have a neighbour come by one night after 9pm, asking me to stop running the shop-vac... I was... well... vacumming the lawn... ummm, slight miscalculation with a powerwasher, and raised deck, wind, and white flaky paint chips, which I didn't want embedded into the lawn...

sigh...
posted by jkaczor at 9:50 PM on March 24, 2002

about the 'stupid Irish',

Hey lay off us stupid Irish, we're doing the best we can!
posted by jonmc at 10:15 AM on March 25, 2002

Hey, you can't say that, JonMC. You're supposed to get all belligerent and upset and offended, and rant about how there's all sorts of racial bias against the Irish, and demand that we pay restitution for repressing you, and claim that prejudice is what keeps you down and drunk, and demand compensation for grievous psychic injury, and start a million Irishman staggwalk, and all that.

Laughing it off is not an option. This is The Era Of Political Correctness, after all. It's not only your right, but your god-damned duty to be offended!
posted by five fresh fish at 10:25 AM on March 25, 2002

Damn, I missed it.

He took it down.
posted by tpoh.org at 3:59 PM on March 25, 2002

it's back, and he's polished the rough edges mentioned throughout these comments.

presumably to protect the innocent [or in this case, the guilty].
posted by basmati at 2:56 PM on April 17, 2002