"The Hair" is everywhere

March 24, 2016 6:39 AM

The Hair: Why nearly every woman on TV has the same hairstyle.
posted by ocherdraco (100 comments total)

It's also gorgeous.
posted by Talez at 6:55 AM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

Baader-Meinhair.
posted by Etrigan at 6:56 AM on March 24, 2016 [22 favorites]

What does she mean it doesn't happen in nature? That is pretty much what my hair does, as long as I keep it long. If I have short hair,it pyramids out and I look like carrotTop...which, I can tell you, is a bad look for him, but a much worse look on me.
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 7:02 AM on March 24, 2016 [18 favorites]

Maybe I'm just succumbing to the distortion that is TV, and I'm sure it is artificial since everything on TV is artificial, right? But none of them look that "done" to me. It looks casual. And I don't even recognize any of these shows.
posted by elizilla at 7:03 AM on March 24, 2016

You're the Worst is the best show on TV? Gimme these hairs any day.
posted by Beardman at 7:03 AM on March 24, 2016 [5 favorites]

This is one of those trends that accords with what my hair naturally likes to do (it rejects layers, laughs at straighteners, and destroys bangs), so I get that pleasant sensation of being briefly stylish without having actually done anything. Like whenever jewel tones come in!
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:03 AM on March 24, 2016 [11 favorites]

SecretAgentSockPuppet, that is what mine does as well. I think many white people have hair that just goes that way without much trouble. Maybe the article author has a different hair texture that won't do this, and this is why they think it's freaky?
posted by elizilla at 7:06 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

I thought I was just too lazy/broke to get a haircut so it's nice to know my hair is actually on trend! (My hair mostly does this naturally, too, with some coaxing and good conditioner. It's maybe not quite as smooth but I don't have a professional hairstylist attending to me in the mornings.)
posted by darksong at 7:10 AM on March 24, 2016

Of course, we can't have any women with, like, short hair on television. (Or even, for the most part, on Amazon, etc.) That would be awful because unsexy-to-men and unfeminine, and we can't be having with that, so even all the queer women characters have super-long, super-done hair like I very, very rarely see on actual queer women. (Other than on OitNB, basically.)
posted by Frowner at 7:13 AM on March 24, 2016 [35 favorites]

In that shot from Empire there's a lady in the background with some much more interesting hair. Sort of a rockabilly mohawk thing.

I have noticed "the hair." It looks kind of straggly and boring to me. I have a hard time telling all the skinny white ladies with the same hairstyle apart, they're like Barbies.

And if shows were only worried about profiles and showing faces, short hair would work even better. But too many shows think lead women must have long flowy hair, to fly back in the wind or hang down when she leans over to kiss someone, and basically indicate This One is the Princess.
posted by emjaybee at 7:13 AM on March 24, 2016 [10 favorites]

Half those people have bangs and half those people don't have bangs, which is pretty much the exact opposite of having the same hairstyle.
posted by jacquilynne at 7:14 AM on March 24, 2016 [6 favorites]

(At least for white chicks. My god, the agony over whether or not to cut bangs into your hair.)
posted by jacquilynne at 7:15 AM on March 24, 2016 [5 favorites]

Needed to add, the lady on Blindspot has a nice short cut, very Trinity-like. Maybe women in dystopian sci-fi/futuristic police procedurals get more hairstyle choices?
posted by emjaybee at 7:15 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

If you keep mostly-straight hair twisted back in some kind of bun style, this is what it does when you let it down. It's not so much that it never occurs in the wild, but why is this pretty much the only hairstyle women can have in mainstream entertainment? The article addresses some practical reasons for this (it looks more consistent from shot to shot, it keeps the hair off the actress's face), but I'm curious about the semiotics of it, too. To me it seems to comport with current cultural expectations around feminine identity and presentation--soft, voluptuous, ornamental, but at the same time unfussy. The "cool girl" of hairstyles.
posted by milk white peacock at 7:15 AM on March 24, 2016 [39 favorites]

I have long been aware of this. Not only can we not have any women with short hair, we can't have any women with actually curly hair, or any women with naturally textured hair of any kind...actually, you know, let's not have women and we can leave it at that.
posted by epanalepsis at 7:16 AM on March 24, 2016 [11 favorites]

Two characters on Girls are rocking a short hairstyle for season 5.
posted by aabbbiee at 7:16 AM on March 24, 2016 [4 favorites]

I disapprove of any media hair trend that involves heat styling. Or hairbrushes. Here's hoping for more naturally textured hair on TV, someday.
posted by asperity at 7:17 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

Women are expected to project laid-back, effortless beauty which actually takes a lot of unseen effort. See also makeup with a "natural look."
posted by milk white peacock at 7:18 AM on March 24, 2016 [24 favorites]

Not hair, but the ubiquity reminds me of the post from a year ago saying that women in Disney/Pixar all have the same face shape. Ubiquity because depictions of women are constrained by the need to be attractive.
posted by little onion at 7:23 AM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

I remember when Leslie Knope's hair morphed into this, I was like "what is happening? Oh, it's for continuity, ugh," and I've felt the same way about the hair ever since. I dislike it the way I dislike people pretending to drink out of empty cups, or pretending to struggle with carrying a suitcase/box that is clearly empty.

I do NOT dislike this hair on people in real life. People in real life look awesome with any hair choices!

But yeah, on tv, it is decidedly weird for nearly EVERY main female character to have the same look all the time.
posted by a fiendish thingy at 7:25 AM on March 24, 2016 [6 favorites]

I just want to clarify that, as someone who identified as and lived as a woman for about 37 years (not how I identify now), there's a world of difference between "short" hair that is like the left-most character in the Girls photo and, say, good old Emma Watson's former pixie cut. A lot of people call the Girls cut "short" because the ideal for women is to have hair that is at least to your shoulders, but you don't really start getting the "men don't like it"/"ugly lezbo" treatment until you have an actual short cut.

There was always a point where my hair grew past my ears and men would start treating me differently. It was like magic - as soon as my hair had any sort of flow, I stopped getting the aggro hostility that I get all the time now from men.
posted by Frowner at 7:25 AM on March 24, 2016 [26 favorites]

I liked Negasonic Teenage Warhead's hairstyle.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:29 AM on March 24, 2016 [20 favorites]

Lena Dunham's hair is definitely a pixie cut. Zosia Mamet's hair (the furthest left in that photo) is cut above her chin, which is considered a short haircut for a woman.

I too have had a typical lesbian haircut and have experienced the aggro hostility myself, so while I get what you're saying, there's still a little bit of the "no true Scotsman" fallacy going on here.
posted by aabbbiee at 7:35 AM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

i want an entire 10 page article on the styling of jane the virgin. it's super fascinating in that they do mostly all have long hair that has some bounce in the bottom, and there is a lot of very similar make up, but the differences between characters' styles mimics the differences between characters. take xo and jane for instance, the thing the author is talking about with the beauty queen hair? that's what xo does. but jane very much does the full effort "effortless" version of that same thing. you also see this xo and jane's makeup, especially their lips. i sometimes get so distracted picking apart and analyzing the styling of the show that i have to rewind and watch scenes again. don't even get me started on the sets and lighting. it's an incredible show and so much thought has seemingly gone into even the tiniest detail.
posted by nadawi at 7:36 AM on March 24, 2016 [11 favorites]

I call it the Cocker Spaniel Hair. Think of a cocker spaniel's head. Its hair is flat at the top of the head but then the ears have this cascading super-luxe curly look. Cocker spaniel hair - and I've seen ladies sport it in real life. It's weird.
posted by kariebookish at 7:37 AM on March 24, 2016 [13 favorites]

there's in fact women in this very thread that talk about how it's something their hair does naturally - i don't think it's weird at all.
posted by nadawi at 7:41 AM on March 24, 2016 [17 favorites]

Well, and there's the fact that most of the hair on TV is a wig (or a "fall," which is a 3/4 wig).

The hairstyle in question is perfect for wigs because the loose curls blend away differences between the actress's natural hair and the hairpiece. Straight hair would make the fake hair more obvious, and curlier hair is hard to match on an actress's own hairline.

(I wore a wig during chemo last year, and it was like the scales fell from my eyes once I knew what wigs look like. Lots of people on TV are wearing wigs.)
posted by purpleclover at 7:42 AM on March 24, 2016 [21 favorites]

In a mudbrick hut on a windswept planet, a grizzled Jennifer Aniston looks up sharply from the cooking fire. Her gaze turns to the scattering of stars visible in the night sky through her crudely cut window. She narrows her eyes. You may have need of me, she chides the force that calls to her, but what need now have I of you? She knows, though, that this is a call she will not ignore.
posted by No-sword at 7:45 AM on March 24, 2016 [37 favorites]

So none of these women have hair that frizzes? Fine, they all have this hair because it's stylish and pretty now, whatever, but it even shows up in post-apocalyptic The 100 and none of them have frizz, which, come off it.
posted by jeather at 7:46 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

I call it the Cocker Spaniel Hair. Think of a cocker spaniel's head. Its hair is flat at the top of the head but then the ears have this cascading super-luxe curly look. Cocker spaniel hair - and I've seen ladies sport it in real life. It's weird.

Lots of folk with light to middling curly hair don't have curls all the way to the root. Maybe it's weight or something else, but if I let my hair curl it looks a lot like what you're describing. I promise you that I've done nothing to it.
posted by Emma May Smith at 7:48 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

I mean, the fact that dogs manage to get this style to happen on their heads effortlessly should be pretty convincing evidence that it is not a high-effort look, yeah?
posted by town of cats at 7:57 AM on March 24, 2016 [10 favorites]

I think part of what makes it feel artificial is that we generally see actresses right after a cut in the scene, where the hairstylist has come on set and reorganized their hair so the curls are perfectly evenly situated, just enough hair in front of the shoulder to look just-so, no tucking behind the ears, etc. This is a hairstyle that makes it more obvious that you've just been freshly rearranged and hairsprayed or whatever, where like a bob wouldn't look that different.
posted by LobsterMitten at 7:57 AM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

Well, and there's the fact that most of the hair on TV is a wig (or a "fall," which is a 3/4 wig).

Yeah, I think this is the central fact about tv (and movie) hair. There are no women with thin hair on TV, because they all have thick, luxurious fake hair. How it's styled is a secondary issue.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 7:59 AM on March 24, 2016 [7 favorites]

Extensions must play a big role in this. It's easy to add a lot of extensions (for more volume) when you have hair at that length, because they tend to come in lengths about that length, and you can curl just those parts without having to give a big curly 'do.

In 5 years, every woman on TV will be sporting another version of this. Also, men. Remember Caesar cuts? Those look silly now.
posted by xingcat at 7:59 AM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

Y'know, I'm pretty sure that back in the 1960, I saw that hair on . . .

That Girl.
 
posted by Herodios at 8:01 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

Well, the author does refer to You're the Worst as "the most perfect show on television," so her credibility checks out.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:02 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

I'm about ten minutes old enough to appreciate the spiky Pat Benatar/Joan Jett look from the mid 1980's
posted by Sphinx at 8:03 AM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

I noticed this in the publicity stills for Fuller House. "Here are 3 proper grown ladies; you can tell by their proper acceptable hair."

It's nice that the style that signals "acceptable woman" is something that a lot of people's hair does anyway but it would be nicer if there were more than one or two options.
posted by bleep at 8:08 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

" Cocker spaniel hair - and I've seen ladies sport it in real life. It's weird."

Yes, it's what happens to thick, heavy curly hair when the weight of the hair pulls the curls near the crown flat. There are two ways to combat this: Either 20 to 40 pins at the crown of the head to take the weight off the curls near the crown while it dries, or spending at least half an hour after showering lying with your head upsidedown off the end of a couch or bed so the roots aren't weighted down. My disinterest in engaging in either of these two high-maintenance activities apparently makes me look "weird" and like a literal dog to you, which always brightens up any woman's day, to hear the patriarchy rule her natural hair makes her visually comparable to a dog.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:08 AM on March 24, 2016 [47 favorites]

Y'know, I'm pretty sure that back in the 1960, I saw that hair on . . .

That Girl.

That's a flip. Different thing.
posted by Etrigan at 8:10 AM on March 24, 2016 [9 favorites]

Some of these look like different styles to me?

Am I hair-stupid?
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 8:11 AM on March 24, 2016

"It's nice that the style that signals "acceptable woman" is something that a lot of people's hair does anyway but it would be nicer if there were more than one or two options."

Don't worry; it won't last. Ten years ago career services at my law school rebuked my hair -- exactly the same then as it is now, as it won't do anything else -- as looking childish, unserious, "too liberal," and "too ethnic" (Irish is ethnic, I guess?) and ordered me to straighten it, flatten it, and ideally dye it blond or brown because it was "making a political statement" (I'm not kidding!) by BEING RED. Now my hair is briefly grown-up and professional! It won't last.

(The saddest part is, after I laughed in their faces and refused, I had an interviewer tell me he liked my resume but my hair was "too Democratic" and would be offputting for their clients; they preferred to put forward a more neutral politics, especially with female attorneys, because clients were always suspicious women were liberal to start with.)

Anyway, TV hair is faddish; in another five years everyone will have some other mandatory hair and all the women with that hair will be like "YAY! I am briefly stylish!" and all of us with different hair will be like "Siiiiigh back to getting told my hair is incorrect and bad."
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:13 AM on March 24, 2016 [33 favorites]

(At least for white chicks. My god, the agony over whether or not to cut bangs into your hair.)

If your hair is sufficiently slow-growing, bangs are a commitment to a solid year of shitty awkward hair in the future, whenever the world (or your morning routine) decides that bangs are wrong again for whatever reason.

signed,
another literal dog apparently.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 8:14 AM on March 24, 2016 [5 favorites]

My hair (very thick and heavy, but so curly that it does not actually flatten up top naturally -- and it's waist length) is never fashionable. (Frizz, frizz, frizz.)

Unless, of course, I have just spent 2 hours at a stylist, in which case my hair looks fantastic until I sleep or it rains.
posted by jeather at 8:19 AM on March 24, 2016 [4 favorites]

bleep: "I noticed this in the publicity stills for Fuller House. "Here are 3 proper grown ladies; you can tell by their proper acceptable hair."

It's nice that the style that signals "acceptable woman" is something that a lot of people's hair does anyway but it would be nicer if there were more than one or two options."

I don't want to go too deeply into the semiotics of Fuller House, but I'm sure only D.J. is really a "proper" woman. Stephanie and Kimmy Gibbler are clearly the wacky sister/friend role.
posted by Chrysostom at 8:28 AM on March 24, 2016

I have noticed this! I see a difference between when this happens naturally vs via a heat styling tool. Mostly, it's that the "beachy waves" look as it is called on Pinterest often means the very tips of the hair are actually not curled. When it's natural, yes you get the straight on top and more curls towards the bottom but I usually can ID the heat styling version pretty quickly. I think the trend is changing a bit so there now is more curl at the tips but for a while this or this was the style that everyone had. Often combined with an ombre or bayalage coloring technique.

It's not just on your fiction TV shows either. Every female SportsCenter anchor has curled hair.

I'll admit to being a little bitter because my hair is too fine to pull this off, plus I'm in the midst of growing out my very very short hair, and/or I've never quite mastered the "use a straight iron to get waves" technique. I actually yelled at the TV a few weeks ago "Why isn't anyone allowed to have straight hair anymore?!"

The other day I was watching wrestling and Stephanie McMahon came out with sleek, straight hair and I saw a complaint on twitter: "Why is her hair so flat?" I would very much like to see women represented in media with a MUCH wider range of hair styles and colors. Not just on shows you need to pay $15 a month for HBO to watch.
posted by misskaz at 8:30 AM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

So basically, it's a hair style that has the maximum function for it's use.

Mrs. VTX and I were watching a Big 10 gymnastics meet last weekend and I commented that one gymnast's hair really stood out. It was because the gymnast is black and had a sort of short afro and every other athlete there had their hair pulled back tight into some flavor of pony-tail and they all looked basically the same.

She was the only one whose hair type allowed a different style that would still function in that context.

But none of them look that "done" to me. It looks casual.

A TON of work goes into their hair, clothes, and make-up so that everyone you see on TV looks really well put together while still looking like they're trying very hard to look that put together.

So a lot make-up goes on to make it look like they're not wearing very much make-up, hair is carefully styled to look really good but as if that person just towels it dry and sort of naturally looks that way, and clothing coordinates and fits perfect while looking like they just grabbed stuff at random out of their closet.

Much like the consent and awkward conversations around sex all happen by looking deep into each other's eyes. Or the way James Bond doesn't really have enough time in the day to do his job AND put the hours of practice it would take to maintain that level of skill in any one of the disciplines he is an expert in (driving, shooting, martial arts, etc.).

I mean, it's fantasy. It's supposed to show us all the best outcomes without any of the effort that would have to go into it in reality.
posted by VTX at 8:31 AM on March 24, 2016

This is my hair in real life, too, and now I'm super sad and like, really angry, that some people think I look like a literal dog and/or have a stupid hairstyle. Wishing I hadn't clicked on the link or read the comments here, cos I kind of thought my hair was looking awesome without me doing basically any work on it at all.

Like, seriously, now I'm worrying that most people think my hair is dumb and I forgot a ponytail elastic today and I'm going to feel super self-conscious all day.
posted by cooker girl at 8:38 AM on March 24, 2016 [8 favorites]

As a guy, I can say that my hair does this too, if it gets long enough. I've had hair down to bottom of my shoulder blades and once it gets roughly past my ear it starts to do the "skater flip", then once past my chin it starts to try and curl like this. Due to keeping it in a ponytail most of the time, it never really stayed that way, but yeah this is pretty common in the wild.
posted by Twain Device at 8:44 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

cooker girl, if it helps, I think curly/wavy hair is soooo pretty and I am very jealous of anyone who has hair that does that naturally or can make it happen without gobs of sticky product. Seriously.
posted by misskaz at 8:45 AM on March 24, 2016 [8 favorites]

for what it's worth, hours before this article was written i was figuring out if my super fine refuses to hold a curl hair would do this if i did a tshirt tie on the ends and twisted it into two buns while i slept. i think it's a gorgeous style and i'm jealous of people who can just towel dry it to get there.
posted by nadawi at 8:45 AM on March 24, 2016 [6 favorites]

This is kind of my hair in theory (though I won't pretend I roll out of bed with barrel-iron salon curls). It's a nice hairstyle, I think! And I appreciate being accidentally stylish. The more 'done' version of this was pretty ubiquitous among celebrities for a few years (Kardashians et al). But I definitely think that in a few years this will be the 'late aughts hair'... nothing wrong with that, it's just an era marker a la 20s bobs or The Rachel.

Still holding out hope that Claire Underwood's pixie cut will have its cultural moment.
posted by sonmi at 8:48 AM on March 24, 2016

If your hair is sufficiently slow-growing, bangs are a commitment to a solid year of shitty awkward hair in the future, whenever the world (or your morning routine) decides that bangs are wrong again for whatever reason.

Oh, trust me, I know. I have managed to restrain myself from cutting bangs into my hair for over 10 years now. But it's a close thing sometimes. And every once in awhile, I think of just choosing a short cut in general, which has similar problems, because the front of my hair grows out so much slower than the back. (Or, more accurately has further to grow out to look long.) But so far, so good. Right now, I just wear it pulled back off my face and up off my neck in the same way at all times. I would love to do this kind of beachy wave thing that's apparently all over TV, but I don't have enough actual hair to get this look. It would just look stringy, instead.
posted by jacquilynne at 8:51 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

I noticed this a three years ago at my sister's high school graduation in Indiana. I was astounded how 75% of her female classmates had that hairstyle and theirs were much more similar than the examples in the article.

But then I guess high school with its emphasis on conformity lends itself to this sort of behavior. When I was in high school back in the late 90s, a similar percentage of the guys all had fades.
posted by nolnacs at 8:53 AM on March 24, 2016

That "Girls" promo photo is so bizarrely pieced together and Photoshopped. Look at the lighting. It's different on everyone. And the background is pasted in. It's so weird looking. For a show that's very naturalistic, it's jarring. Bad job, HBO!
posted by jeff-o-matic at 8:53 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

everything old is new again : in the 90s it was the Friend's haircut, right ?
posted by k5.user at 8:54 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

It's definitely a continuity thing. Everything these days is about continuity. The whole Cinema Verité style that's nearly ubiquitous these days is more than just a choice... it makes editing easier, and shooting faster. All in all, cheaper.
posted by jeff-o-matic at 8:57 AM on March 24, 2016

To be fair tho I would much rather spend my afternoon with a cocker spaniel than any actual human person of any variety, so you've got that going for you, which is nice.
posted by phunniemee at 8:57 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

everything old is new again : in the 90s it was the Friend's haircut, right ?

I had a Rachel in 1996 -- probably the tail end of when it was fashionable. I didn't even mean to get it. It was like a standard issue haircut for women with fine hair that worked best in layers.
posted by gladly at 9:05 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

I could never get my hair to do this. I'd use rollers and/or curlers to get one side perfect and the other side looked like bizarro snarl. I can't do symmetrical.

After years of agonizing over bangs/no bangs, chin-length, shoulder-length, waist-length, I finally told my hairdresser to "Give me the Furiosa," and I have never looked back. Taking hair decisions out of the equation was the best decision I've made in a long while.
posted by bibliowench at 9:07 AM on March 24, 2016 [8 favorites]

i don't ask for the rachel, but the way my fine hair + cowlicks + the length i like works, sometimes i accidentally end up with something similar once it grows out a bit. when i go to get it cut from someone new i spend forever trying to find pictures that have the right amount of fine hair layers but are not "the rachel" so i'm not mocked or judged. the pressure women put on ourselves and other women to be the right kind of fashionable is exhausting.
posted by nadawi at 9:08 AM on March 24, 2016 [5 favorites]

i unfortunately got tricked into promising my very sweet grandmother that i wouldn't shave my head as long as she was around to see it. i hope i have a good decade or more before i can shave it again, but boy do i miss it!
posted by nadawi at 9:09 AM on March 24, 2016

This style is what my hair did naturally when I was a kid -- no idea if it still would, since it's been chin-length or shorter since I was 14. There were also a couple of times when the stars would align and my hair spontaneously formed a very unnatural-looking banana curl sort of thing for a few months and then went back to wavy/frizzy/pyramidal.
posted by zeptoweasel at 9:14 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

This is also what my hair does!

I need pics of this now.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:15 AM on March 24, 2016

Actually I would like pictures of this haircut on any men, it's hard to imagine though clearly the truth is out there.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:16 AM on March 24, 2016

I just looked at every picture on this bad article and none of the men had the Haircut. We may be breaking new ground here people.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:20 AM on March 24, 2016

I don't think the dog thing is meant to be insulting, merely descriptive. (My hair is also just like this.)

Here is what drives me FUCKING BONKERS though. If I look for photos of haircuts for wavy hair, I cannot ever find anything where the curls are just natural curls! They're always heat-styled! So I have no idea what that cut would actually look like on me, a person who air-drys 95% of the time.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:21 AM on March 24, 2016 [11 favorites]

Does Jared Leto count, or is that insufficiently curly at the bottom?
posted by Etrigan at 9:22 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

Actually I would like pictures of this haircut on any men, it's hard to imagine though clearly the truth is out there.

Well there's this guy.
posted by phunniemee at 9:22 AM on March 24, 2016 [14 favorites]

I don't think the dog thing is meant to be insulting, merely descriptive.

I think the "It's weird." tacked on to the end of the comment makes it insulting.
posted by cooker girl at 9:23 AM on March 24, 2016 [7 favorites]

The show Sleepy Hollow has been doing interesting things in its third season with the hair of its female protagonist, Abbie Mills, a black woman who before has always displayed The Hair in carefully styled form.

SLEEPY HOLLOW SEASON 3 SPOILER ALERT

• Abbie Mills from seasons 1 - early season 3: The Hair, The Hair, The gently-flowing Hair, as deliberate and elegant as Abbie's personality
• Abbie Mills after spending a year trapped alone, fighting for survival, and going slightly crazy in a hellish Purgatory dimension: curls, natural curls, Purgatory doesn't have straightening treatments (though it seemingly has mascara)

Even after her return home, initially Abbie retains her natural curls, perhaps indicating the profound effect her ordeal had on her and/or an outward symbol that her sanity has not quite fully returned after isolation and sinister magic screwed with her head.

By now Abbie has returned to a pulled-back professional ponytail, but she's kept the curls. Maybe hair-straightening feels petty and unappealing after a year of natural hair in hell.
posted by nicebookrack at 9:26 AM on March 24, 2016 [8 favorites]

Actually I would like pictures of this haircut on any men, it's hard to imagine though clearly the truth is out there.

My hair was sufficiently long for a while, although I wore it in a ponytail, until I finally cut it last year. I let it hang loose for Halloween to scare trick-or-treaters, and this was the result.
posted by Faint of Butt at 9:42 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

My hair does this as well because it's wavy and once it gets a certain length the weight of my hair makes the top flat like the pictures; but I see this article as fairly pointless, especially when it opines that the hairstyle isn't natural. Women's hairstyles that have been popular over the past several hundred of years (or more) have never been "natural". The term and practice of hairstyling is basically making hair do what it doesn't naturally do. And go back 10, 20, 30 years or more of tv hairstyles and one will find the same ubiquity of a certain style.
posted by SA456 at 9:47 AM on March 24, 2016

Actually I would like pictures of this haircut on any men, it's hard to imagine though clearly the truth is out there.

When I had long hair, it totally did this. Heck, even now it will start to wing if I stretch the time between cuts too long (which I often do as I hate getting my hair cut).
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:04 AM on March 24, 2016

Even the new Lex Luther is in on the game. Providing for a dramatic turn when it's inevitably removed late in the second act.
posted by OwlBoy at 10:07 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

My daughter's hair is pretty much this exactly, to the point where it does kind of look like I take a curling iron to her ends, which I don't. She is almost three. I think it's so dramatic because at the ends she still has hair from when she was born, and it's curlier than the rest of her hair.

My hair is finer and less straight, and very layered, and it kiiiind of looks like this but has more frizz and craziness. I only get it cut once or twice a year (I hate getting haircuts - literally would rather go to the dentist), and when it gets longer the weight makes it straighter.
posted by town of cats at 10:27 AM on March 24, 2016

Actually I would like pictures of this haircut on any men, it's hard to imagine though clearly the truth is out there.

Lots of paintings of cavalier-era gentlemen. Like the canonical picture of Shakespeare, but moreso.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 10:38 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

I think the article does a good job in one sentence of distinguishing The Hair from beach waves/natural curls/Jesse Eisenberg etc.:

Natural waves are never this three-dimensional, and natural curls contain way fewer strands per spiral.

The Hair isn't just any hair that is smooth on top and then has some degree of wave, curl, or frizz at the bottom. It's a specific style with big sections of hair being formed into large-diameter curls.
posted by mama casserole at 10:42 AM on March 24, 2016 [14 favorites]

Lex Luther

Now *there's* an interesting character idea. He'd nail 95 theses on the door of the Fortress of Solitude.
posted by Chrysostom at 10:44 AM on March 24, 2016 [11 favorites]

Previous, hair on teevee was modeled after Jennifer Aniston. This seems a bit less contrived, is pretty on a lot of women, but, could we be people with hair that has individual characteristics? In winter's reduced humidity, I might be able to manage that look for a couple hours, but my hair is hard to restrain, and I can't be bothered with lots of maintenance on it.

I re-watched some (ok, all) of the West Wing recently, and the wonderful, talented Alison Janney has a straightened shag or bob in it, and now has a looser version of The Hair, which looks terrific on her, in Mom. No matter what 'do she rocks, she is an amazing actress.
posted by theora55 at 10:45 AM on March 24, 2016

my hair was "too Democratic"

...the fuck?

I wore my hair in a porcupine cut when I lived in Germany in the 80s, dyed purple. Let it grow in college and kept growing it, occasionally attempting perms (they never took well). Now, at 45, it's down to my ass, stick straight, and deep purple. Aside from dyeing it, the only thing I do is wash and brush it. No styling aside from a ponytail or a bun if it's hot and I want it up off my neck.

Would that be too Democratic, or too Socialist, you think?
posted by MissySedai at 10:51 AM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

Last year my wife lost all her hair from chemo.
As it has been growing back, it has been a journey through hair, which I think is quite liberating for her as a professional woman.

She has had the Sinead (her least favorite because she says her head gets cold), progressed from there to the Furiosa as mentioned up thread, the Negasonic Teenage Warhead (which I thought suited her).
She had a fade with snowflake sides for Christmas, hearts for Valentines day, and is now exploring the wonders of pomade.
Next along the hairstyle timeline is probably a pixie cut, and then shoulder length but I am not sure she will ever go return to the mid-back length she had for years previously.

While I do not recommend cancer as a catalyst for change, I know my wife has been enjoying the opportunity to experiment with her appearance in a way she wouldn't have had the opportunity (or maybe courage) to do before.

So I say forget about The Hair and go crazy.
Grow some Farrah Fawcett wings because you've always wanted to, dig the Aquanet out of the back of the cabinet, find your inner Manic Pixie Dream Cut.
Just stay away from the Sinead in the winter. Unless you like hats.
posted by madajb at 11:02 AM on March 24, 2016 [7 favorites]

I think the "It's weird." tacked on to the end of the comment makes it insulting.

Aw, I'm sorry you took it as insulting. I assure you it was not meant as much.

My 'looks weird' comment was more along the lines of seeing hair styles on the street that are meant to look like TV hair which in turns look like an uncanny valley version of everyday hair. A bit like makeup trends that mimic reality TV makeup trends that are heightened version of street makeup trends. It's a fascinating thing - and it always takes me aback.
posted by kariebookish at 11:19 AM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

This is a hilarious article. I was actually really happy that this was the particular few years of television where people had my hair (they aren't my ethnicity though, but eh). My hair is naturally slightly wavy and curls away from my face, due to me having layers and shorter bangs around my face. I was always aggravated by "The Rachel" and pinstraight hair being the norm growing up in my early teens, since it seemed really unattainable and only for people with very fine hair. Also, by how EVERY Asian person had pinstraight hair, which is also strange.

Y/N to hair diversity?
posted by yueliang at 12:13 PM on March 24, 2016

Yes hello I too have straight hair on top and curls on the bottom. I do not have The Hair, my curls are much skinnier and more numerous than that unless my hair guy has insisted on blowing it out or I have put it up wet and taken it down to dry. I have much finer hair than Eyebrows describes, but it's equally difficult to get any sort of curl or volume up top.

My mom has pin straight hair and doesn't understand how this works, so when I was a teenager she wanted to know why I was wearing my hair like Janis Joplin.
posted by clavicle at 1:38 PM on March 24, 2016

I'm tired of The Hair combined with That One Tawny Shade on white actresses. The Fuller House women are a good example of this. It's just, can we have different hair styles? Lengths? Colors? It's just so tired and Stepford Wife at this point.
posted by Windigo at 1:49 PM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

No-sword: "In a mudbrick hut on a windswept planet, a grizzled Jennifer Aniston looks up sharply from the cooking fire. Her gaze turns to the scattering of stars visible in the night sky through her crudely cut window. She narrows her eyes. You may have need of me, she chides the force that calls to her, but what need now have I of you? She knows, though, that this is a call she will not ignore."

Where is your God now?
posted by team lowkey at 2:07 PM on March 24, 2016 [4 favorites]

cooker girl, don't feel bad about your hair! I love that style when I see it it it's natural habitat (i.e. on a head that grows wavy hair) and anytime I want to fancy myself up I'll try to mimic it with a curling iron. If I saw you in person I wouldn't be judging, I'd be thinking "she looks lovely"
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 2:12 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

haha my barista tonight has The Hair I'm not gonna be able to unsee this for like ever

(It is clearly heat styled)
posted by clavicle at 4:42 PM on March 24, 2016

I actually spent all day on the lookout for The Hair. I did not see any instances of The Hair, although I did see lots of normal-looking wavy hair.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 4:51 PM on March 24, 2016

My last boss had this style. I always knew when something special was going on because I'd walk into the bathroom and find her curling iron on the sink.

I, however, do not have this hair. Mine is thick, coarse and curly. Right now I have an asymmetrical short 'do with one short spiky side and one curly bob side. Last year I had teal stripes in it. Nobody on tv has my hair!
posted by Biblio at 6:44 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

When I was growing up in America in the 90s/early 2000s, I was repeatedly told by people that no one would ever take me seriously if I kept my naturally very curly hair curly. The counsellor at school even told me curly hair was a barrier to becoming a professional, because it looked 'too ethnic.'
posted by toerinishuman at 8:14 PM on March 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

To cooker girl, specifically, but to all the women in this thread, I bet you look dope with your long wavy brown locks. But, you (with the wavy TV locks...that are somehow now bad??) have inspired me.

Just some Random Ideas for my new blog...thoughts?

How women with short hair are treated
How women with brown hair are treated
How fat women are treated
How thin women are treated
How black women are treated
How mothers are treated
How sick women are treated
How Muslim women are treated
How women managers are treated
How disabled women are treated
FFS How severely disabled women are treated
How pretty women are treated
How old women are treated
How pregnant women are treated
How young women are treated
How poor women are treated
How wealthy women are treated
How Asian women are treated
How women with “tv hair” because that’s a thing are treated
How nursing mothers are treated
How competent women are treated
How exhausted women are treated
How women who parent as a career are treated
How women with cancer are treated

It's going to get boring. Every blog post is just going to say:

Shitty.

Crone Island Folks. I'll make the cocktails...
posted by metasav at 8:22 PM on March 24, 2016 [10 favorites]

(Because it seems like we have already managed my future blog:

How women with long hair are treated

--right here. Answer above.)
posted by metasav at 8:25 PM on March 24, 2016

How women with long hair are treated

Oooh, wait! How Middle Aged Women With Long Hair Are Treated!

I have been asked many times now when I'm going to "act my age" and cut my hair. I am "too old" to wear my hair long. I have been told this by men and women alike. I was never informed of any expiration date on the length of my hair!

My typical response is a cheery "Fuuuuuck yoooouuuu".
posted by MissySedai at 10:19 PM on March 24, 2016 [4 favorites]

I've totally tinned myself by not explicitly including trans-women (I assume you are any and all of the women on my list) I absolutely should have explicitly said (though I'm still leaving out so many kinds of women) how

How trans women are treated
posted by metasav at 11:30 PM on March 24, 2016

Hmpf, kids today. You don't know how lucky you have it!

/returns concentration to walking to school barefoot in the snow, uphill both ways
posted by taz at 1:06 AM on March 25, 2016

Oh I'm no kid, and I went through many an Ogilve home perm and cans of Aqua Net to try to get that 80s do on my pin-straight hair.
posted by misskaz at 7:56 AM on March 25, 2016

Hmpf, kids today. You don't know how lucky you have it!

Speaking as a heterosexual lady who is more trend-conscious than she wants to admit and totally went to junior high at the end of the eighties, let me just tell you that the spiral perm is why I've mostly had short-very short hair since the 8th grade.

On the TV hair issue, I tried to do that with my own straight, fine, wispy hair when I last had long hair (2011ish), but as usual it resulted in curling iron burns on the neck, precarious waves sticky with "we don't call it hairspray anymore because it's a fancy salon and this shit is made out of rose petals and organic unicorn tears and costs $30 a bottle but actually it's totally just green-tea scented Aquanet" hairspray and despair at the utter futility when all the curl had fallen out roughly ten minutes later. It's just easier to go to the salon be like, "I want a cross between Jean Seberg and Edie Sedgwick and no, don't give me a lecture about my face shape."
posted by thivaia at 11:36 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]

I think I was a teenager when I realized that women on tv always look perfect because they have someone come over every two minutes and fix makeup/ brush hair. I hope every girl knows that.

Annie had a really good burn in a fight with Britta on Community once- she said something like "you get up an hour early every day to curl your hair oh so perfectly" and Britta was a character that wasn't supposed to care about those things (although she did).
posted by betsybetsy at 6:00 AM on March 26, 2016 [1 favorite]