Is Staying In The New Going Out?
April 16, 2016 6:57 AM Subscribe
These days, we respond to the question [how was your weekend] with a look of puzzled amnesia. Did we do anything? “Not really,” we say. “It was pretty uneventful.” We furrow our brows trying to remember key events, but nothing comes to mind. It’s as though the last two days have elapsed in a narcotized, undifferentiated blur. A leisure-time blackout. We still have fun — probably? — we just have no clue how it happened. [slnyt]
Also, it's none of your damn business what I did this weekend.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 7:04 AM on April 16, 2016 [36 favorites]
posted by Horace Rumpole at 7:04 AM on April 16, 2016 [36 favorites]
I will posit that the author and coworkers aren't the ones going out because they've aged a bit. When the influx of new grads and interns comes to my office every year, on Mondays, I hear about all the things they did on the weekend (they don't tell me, but I'm an eavesdropper and our cubicles are open plan) and they're doing young -person things out of the house.
posted by xingcat at 7:06 AM on April 16, 2016 [45 favorites]
posted by xingcat at 7:06 AM on April 16, 2016 [45 favorites]
SMH, New York Times. I went out and saw a play last night. It was fantastic. Tonight, we'll probably go to dinner, and tomorrow I'm running a half marathon. Just because you've decided to be a hermit doesn't mean anyone else has.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:07 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:07 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
You got old. I've also gotten old, and started staying in, but my younger friends still go out all the time.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 7:08 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 7:08 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
Is my current lifestyle the hot new trend? I shudder to think of the alternative.
posted by Halloween Jack at 7:09 AM on April 16, 2016 [36 favorites]
posted by Halloween Jack at 7:09 AM on April 16, 2016 [36 favorites]
when I go places on the weekend my guess is that 1/3rd are there so they have an answer to that question on Monday, the other 1/3rd are there so they have something to post on social media judging by the amount of selfies I see them taking. Maybe it's half. I also believe there are organizations that manufacture uninspired "events" with this knowledge in mind.
posted by any major dude at 7:10 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by any major dude at 7:10 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Man, I hate that question, because the real answer is usually a bummer, so I try to find some sort of highlight -- "We went bowling for a couple hours on Sunday and my son rolled a 135," or something like that. I try not to mention the marathon bill-paying sessions, the computer upgrade/repair/backup/maintenance sessions, the frantic trips to the grocery store, the side jobs that keep me working most Saturdays, the trips to the vet with my terrified dog (though those anecdotes can be amusing, people glaze over unless they're dog people)... dammit, I'm usually more exhausted on Monday morning that Friday because I am UP AND AT IT all weekend.(typing this at work. Ugh.)
So "fine" will be all most people get out of me, unless they're good friends.
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:11 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
So "fine" will be all most people get out of me, unless they're good friends.
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:11 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
The only thing that determines a successful weekend is...not working. A stellar weekend includes not even thinking about work.
posted by museum of fire ants at 7:11 AM on April 16, 2016 [89 favorites]
posted by museum of fire ants at 7:11 AM on April 16, 2016 [89 favorites]
Really? Not even a small aside about cost? Staying in is cheaper. Beer at your house is cheaper than beer at a bar. TVs are cheap, Netflix is cheap.
Like every other article about millenials and their apparently inscrutable preferences, this can also be boiled down to a pragmatic decision about where to spend your limited financial resources.
posted by almostmanda at 7:12 AM on April 16, 2016 [67 favorites]
Like every other article about millenials and their apparently inscrutable preferences, this can also be boiled down to a pragmatic decision about where to spend your limited financial resources.
posted by almostmanda at 7:12 AM on April 16, 2016 [67 favorites]
Seriously, NYT? You know going out costs money, right? Young people are not going out because they are unemployed/underemployed and are freaking out about never being able to afford to buy a house/have kids/retire.
Older people go out less because, as has always been the way, they have family obligations that make it harder, or they have got to a point in their lives where their home life is actually comfortable and pleasant.
I was out with friends at a bar on Friday night, and we got to talking about how when we were 20 the bar would have been awesome because it had aircon in summer and heating in winter, which our flats didn't, and there was a big tv out the back, and a pool table for entertainment, and there was enough room for everyone to have a chair each - no one sitting on the floor or a smelly mattress.
Now all we notice is the stickiness of the floor, and the bad lighting, and that the bathroom is gross, and that the drinks cost 10 times what they would at home, and it's kind of loud, and we don't like the music.
And some of our junior colleagues had to go home after about two hours because even at one drink an hour, they had reached their limit for what they could afford to spend in one evening.
posted by lollusc at 7:19 AM on April 16, 2016 [28 favorites]
Older people go out less because, as has always been the way, they have family obligations that make it harder, or they have got to a point in their lives where their home life is actually comfortable and pleasant.
I was out with friends at a bar on Friday night, and we got to talking about how when we were 20 the bar would have been awesome because it had aircon in summer and heating in winter, which our flats didn't, and there was a big tv out the back, and a pool table for entertainment, and there was enough room for everyone to have a chair each - no one sitting on the floor or a smelly mattress.
Now all we notice is the stickiness of the floor, and the bad lighting, and that the bathroom is gross, and that the drinks cost 10 times what they would at home, and it's kind of loud, and we don't like the music.
And some of our junior colleagues had to go home after about two hours because even at one drink an hour, they had reached their limit for what they could afford to spend in one evening.
posted by lollusc at 7:19 AM on April 16, 2016 [28 favorites]
Woah. I was 20 years ahead of a trend?
posted by Mezentian at 7:23 AM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by Mezentian at 7:23 AM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
(I mean, I was trying to be frugal and I still spent enough to scare myself a little. I was out for six hours, and I had two beers ($16) and a cocktail that someone ordered me before I had a chance to see the price ($20) and the cheapest pub meal on the menu ($14), and I took public transport both ways ($12) even though that involved a 30 minute walk from the station at 1am. And my evening still cost $78 (including the $15 cover charge for the terrible band we were seeing.))
posted by lollusc at 7:25 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by lollusc at 7:25 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
The rise of city-dwellers staying in is hard to quantify; how do you measure the frequency with which people don’t leave their homes?
By measuring their spending on leisure activities outside the home. It's not that this phenomenon is hard to quantify, it's that this article presents no evidence that it exists at all.
Cinema receipts have been up and down in the last few years (US was up in 2015), so I'm not sure there's much evidence of a trend there. I guess it's plausible that there could be an increase in staying in. But the opposite is plausible too. So yes.
posted by howfar at 7:25 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
By measuring their spending on leisure activities outside the home. It's not that this phenomenon is hard to quantify, it's that this article presents no evidence that it exists at all.
Cinema receipts have been up and down in the last few years (US was up in 2015), so I'm not sure there's much evidence of a trend there. I guess it's plausible that there could be an increase in staying in. But the opposite is plausible too. So yes.
posted by howfar at 7:25 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
The author is entitled to any opinion she wants to express, but this:
our modern horrors — terrorism, global warming, presidential campaigns — are documented so thoroughly that a voyage outdoors can feel just as dire [as living in a sod house in 19th Century Nebraska]
I doubt even she believes.
There's a decent 50-word observation in here, but the editor wanted 500 words, so that's what we got.
posted by ferdydurke at 7:30 AM on April 16, 2016 [11 favorites]
our modern horrors — terrorism, global warming, presidential campaigns — are documented so thoroughly that a voyage outdoors can feel just as dire [as living in a sod house in 19th Century Nebraska]
I doubt even she believes.
There's a decent 50-word observation in here, but the editor wanted 500 words, so that's what we got.
posted by ferdydurke at 7:30 AM on April 16, 2016 [11 favorites]
it's that this article presents no evidence that it exists at all
Hey, listen, this is a trendpiece. The author licked their finger and stuck it to the NYC trend winds. What more evidence do you need?
posted by dis_integration at 7:31 AM on April 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
Hey, listen, this is a trendpiece. The author licked their finger and stuck it to the NYC trend winds. What more evidence do you need?
posted by dis_integration at 7:31 AM on April 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
The author seems not to understand that Sex in the City was a fantasy. The people who watched it liked to fantasize about wearing those clothes and living in those apartments and going to art openings and restaurant openings and cocktail parties, but they didn't actually do those things, because that's not a lifestyle that is available to most actual people. Young, hip people in New York were probably always more like the people on Broad City and Master of None, because money. It's just that there wasn't media that reflected that reality.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 7:32 AM on April 16, 2016 [26 favorites]
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 7:32 AM on April 16, 2016 [26 favorites]
As a city dweller, do you know why I don't go out on weekends much?
Because most of the stuff I want to do happens during the week. I like to go to concerts. That is my major vice. Most concerts I go to are during the week. It's a function of there being more weekdays than weekends in a given week, but after dropping a bunch of scratch on a ticket, dinner, and the occasional overpriced venue beer, I'm likely to just stay in on the weekend. Besides, that's the only time I can do laundry.
Now, if you'll excuse me, it's Saturday, and I need to get a haircut before coming back home and... doing laundry.
posted by SansPoint at 7:33 AM on April 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
Because most of the stuff I want to do happens during the week. I like to go to concerts. That is my major vice. Most concerts I go to are during the week. It's a function of there being more weekdays than weekends in a given week, but after dropping a bunch of scratch on a ticket, dinner, and the occasional overpriced venue beer, I'm likely to just stay in on the weekend. Besides, that's the only time I can do laundry.
Now, if you'll excuse me, it's Saturday, and I need to get a haircut before coming back home and... doing laundry.
posted by SansPoint at 7:33 AM on April 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
Apparently, the New York Times has declared "puttering around the house" as the latest observable phenomenon.
posted by Smart Dalek at 7:35 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Smart Dalek at 7:35 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
Why pay $15 to see a boneheaded Marvel rehash in theaters when the world of premium streaming content is at your fingertips?
LOL 15 bucks! any movie me and my Old Lady go to costs upwards of 70 bucks with all expenses accounted for.
I do agree with the boneheaded Marvel rehashes though. why are there so many Spiderman movies?
posted by Max Power at 7:38 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
LOL 15 bucks! any movie me and my Old Lady go to costs upwards of 70 bucks with all expenses accounted for.
I do agree with the boneheaded Marvel rehashes though. why are there so many Spiderman movies?
posted by Max Power at 7:38 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I am always sort of stunned by the level of self-centeredness a person must possess to pen defining missives on their "generation" using their personal experiences as the rubric.
Or is it just some fundamental misapprehension of the use of the editorial "we"?
posted by jammy at 7:38 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
Or is it just some fundamental misapprehension of the use of the editorial "we"?
posted by jammy at 7:38 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
And my evening still cost $78
And if you want to really feel the pain, those are post-tax dollars, so you had to earn ~$95 to pay for your evening. How many hours did you work in exchange for six hours of "going out?" (Not a real question; don't answer it.)
posted by five fresh fish at 7:40 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
And if you want to really feel the pain, those are post-tax dollars, so you had to earn ~$95 to pay for your evening. How many hours did you work in exchange for six hours of "going out?" (Not a real question; don't answer it.)
posted by five fresh fish at 7:40 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
Nobody goes out anymore. The bars are too crowded.
posted by AndrewInDC at 7:43 AM on April 16, 2016 [31 favorites]
posted by AndrewInDC at 7:43 AM on April 16, 2016 [31 favorites]
Especially if you've been doing physical work, having a weekend where you can physically recover is nice. When I worked a less physically taxing job, on weekends I would go out and hike or other such outdoor things, now I just need those days to recuperate.
It's depressing.
posted by Ferreous at 7:45 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
It's depressing.
posted by Ferreous at 7:45 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
"Hey, Missy! How was your weekend?"
I work weekends. Mind, I'm done at 5:30, but all I want to do when I'm done is...not much of anything. People come over for a bonfire on Saturday nights, but it's right back to it on Sunday morning.
All of my "weekend" stuff happens on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. It's nice that one of my days off falls on $5 movie day at the local Cinemark.
posted by MissySedai at 7:47 AM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
I work weekends. Mind, I'm done at 5:30, but all I want to do when I'm done is...not much of anything. People come over for a bonfire on Saturday nights, but it's right back to it on Sunday morning.
All of my "weekend" stuff happens on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. It's nice that one of my days off falls on $5 movie day at the local Cinemark.
posted by MissySedai at 7:47 AM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
This weekend we will be going to a play, probably going out to a bar for karaoke, and going for a hike at a nearby wildlife refuge. In addition to taxes and tying up some loose ends from work. Also catching up on laundry and maybe cleaning the bathroom but definitely at least the sink. In other words, taking it easy.
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:49 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:49 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
I went to a bar last night and saw They Live in a crowd of people, drinking beer, eating overpriced sandwiches, and cracking jokes.
I hadn't gone out, really, in maybe three months prior.
Sooooooo yeah I kind of get it.
posted by Pope Guilty at 7:53 AM on April 16, 2016
I hadn't gone out, really, in maybe three months prior.
Sooooooo yeah I kind of get it.
posted by Pope Guilty at 7:53 AM on April 16, 2016
Is my current lifestyle the hot new trend? I shudder to think of the alternative.
I'm too tired to shudder. Or think.
posted by srboisvert at 7:59 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I'm too tired to shudder. Or think.
posted by srboisvert at 7:59 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I agree with a previous poster that I am a huge fan of live music but most shows happen during my work week and at late hours. I'm nearly 40 so I no longer have the stamina of staying out to see live music super late and being able to function or feel good the next day. (I don't drink at live shows because it's too expensive and it doesn't add much for me in the way of enjoyment.) For example, Frank Turner did a double show here in my town back in February and I was thrilled that he did a 6:30 pm show. Oh man, I wish more musicians did that though I know it's not practical or cool.
I am always down for going out to the pub, but I often request that we do it earlier rather than later as I like to be home by eight or nine pm. This even applies on weekends.
posted by Kitteh at 8:02 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
I am always down for going out to the pub, but I often request that we do it earlier rather than later as I like to be home by eight or nine pm. This even applies on weekends.
posted by Kitteh at 8:02 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
ArbitraryandCapricious: The author seems not to understand that Sex in the City was a fantasy. The people who watched it liked to fantasize about wearing those clothes and living in those apartments and going to art openings and restaurant openings and cocktail parties, but they didn't actually do those things, because that's not a lifestyle that is available to most actual people.
Yes, exactly. Sex and the City was the Dallas or Dynasty (or maybe soap opera) of its day. It was a way for people to live vicariously; just like Friends with its twentysomethings living in a spacious, well-appointed city apartment, and with "good" jobs that still allowed them endless time off to sit and jaw in a cafe all day. Most people don't live like that. The New York Times trend pieces either forget that, or they themselves have bought into the myth.
As an Old, I will tell you that there is so much more to do at home these days, thanks to the Internet and the wide availability of what used to be luxury commodities. When I was a twentysomething who could have been profiled in a NYT piece, you had to go somewhere - bar, restaurant, someone's home - to hang out with your friends. No Internet. No Netflix. No TiVo. No binge watching. No easy and (comparatively) inexpensive kitchen equipment and widely available gourmet seasonings so you could stay home and cook something super-fancy (I really notice the difference between the early 80's and now in that regard). No Kindle, tablets, or e-books. No texting. No fanfic.net or A03, no discussion forums for everything under the sun, no Facebook...
I could go on and on, but I think you get the picture. If more people are staying home (and it's not just another NYT bullshit trend piece) it's because staying home is not nearly as boring or socially isolating as it used to be.
posted by Rosie M. Banks at 8:02 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
Yes, exactly. Sex and the City was the Dallas or Dynasty (or maybe soap opera) of its day. It was a way for people to live vicariously; just like Friends with its twentysomethings living in a spacious, well-appointed city apartment, and with "good" jobs that still allowed them endless time off to sit and jaw in a cafe all day. Most people don't live like that. The New York Times trend pieces either forget that, or they themselves have bought into the myth.
As an Old, I will tell you that there is so much more to do at home these days, thanks to the Internet and the wide availability of what used to be luxury commodities. When I was a twentysomething who could have been profiled in a NYT piece, you had to go somewhere - bar, restaurant, someone's home - to hang out with your friends. No Internet. No Netflix. No TiVo. No binge watching. No easy and (comparatively) inexpensive kitchen equipment and widely available gourmet seasonings so you could stay home and cook something super-fancy (I really notice the difference between the early 80's and now in that regard). No Kindle, tablets, or e-books. No texting. No fanfic.net or A03, no discussion forums for everything under the sun, no Facebook...
I could go on and on, but I think you get the picture. If more people are staying home (and it's not just another NYT bullshit trend piece) it's because staying home is not nearly as boring or socially isolating as it used to be.
posted by Rosie M. Banks at 8:02 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
My answers to questions about the weekend are usually pretty sanitized and anodyne because the reality is either not suitable for workplace conversation, or not something I want to get into with most of my colleagues. I sometimes wonder if many of them are likewise hiding some kinky secrets behind their whitebread office drag.
posted by sevenyearlurk at 8:09 AM on April 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by sevenyearlurk at 8:09 AM on April 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
I wish there was a third option where you could be in a house still, somehow, but not your own. Oh well time for more netflix I guess.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 8:10 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by Potomac Avenue at 8:10 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
I have this conversation a lot as a part of my job Monday mornings caffienating three office towers near downtown Los Angeles, and am happy to be prepared to say I visited the top of a mountain this weekend and it was amazing and free and Nature is not to be underestimated. On the other end of the week, I make a point of asking people if there's anything they're looking forward to over the weekend. If there isn't already, it at least gets people thinking about doing something.
posted by carsonb at 8:12 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by carsonb at 8:12 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
Also, it's totally fine if you want to Netflix and chill or binge watch something and browse Din. One fewer hiker I have to yield to on those beaut switchbacks. ;D
posted by carsonb at 8:13 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by carsonb at 8:13 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Or is it just some fundamental misapprehension of the use of the editorial "we"?
Yeah, apparently, the target audience is urban New Yorkers, so, really outside of my field of experience. I'm going to say that these New York-centric articles are for people with whom I share no life experience, and since I'm not their intended audience anyway, I have nothing to add if my life experience is different.
The Gothamist will always be one of my favorite websites, but I think I am best off staying out of the comments on anything from the New Yorker or NY Times lifestyle sections, here on out. Sorry for cluttering up the thread with my baggage from an entirely different airport.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:15 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Yeah, apparently, the target audience is urban New Yorkers, so, really outside of my field of experience. I'm going to say that these New York-centric articles are for people with whom I share no life experience, and since I'm not their intended audience anyway, I have nothing to add if my life experience is different.
The Gothamist will always be one of my favorite websites, but I think I am best off staying out of the comments on anything from the New Yorker or NY Times lifestyle sections, here on out. Sorry for cluttering up the thread with my baggage from an entirely different airport.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:15 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
It's easier to get good seats at the community theater.
There's elbow room at the bar.
You can see the good stuff at LACMA up close instead of over several heads.
Sure, the Golden Age of Television! I've got it queued.
posted by carsonb at 8:16 AM on April 16, 2016
There's elbow room at the bar.
You can see the good stuff at LACMA up close instead of over several heads.
Sure, the Golden Age of Television! I've got it queued.
posted by carsonb at 8:16 AM on April 16, 2016
I went to an old guy dive in Kensington, after having some coat curry in the restaurant across the street. The jukebox was free from 5 to 7 so we played a lot of classic rock and oldies.
posted by jonmc at 8:17 AM on April 16, 2016
posted by jonmc at 8:17 AM on April 16, 2016
> There are opportunity costs associated with chronic staying in, too.
This person sounds like a real hit at parties.
My wife and I still go out a fair bit at the age of 40-ish, but we don't have kids, which of course makes it a lot easier. I have (perhaps foolishly) committed to seeing two different concerts in two different venues tonight, which is not a typical Saturday night for me. Tomorrow will likely be a Day of Rest.
Anyway, one funny thing about getting older is watching every generation (including my own) act like they invented everything, and react with bemusement/horror as they, against all expectations, get older, get married, have kids, etc., just like their parents and grandparents! "Dear NY Times Style Magazine: I never thought this would happen to me, but..."
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:18 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
This person sounds like a real hit at parties.
My wife and I still go out a fair bit at the age of 40-ish, but we don't have kids, which of course makes it a lot easier. I have (perhaps foolishly) committed to seeing two different concerts in two different venues tonight, which is not a typical Saturday night for me. Tomorrow will likely be a Day of Rest.
Anyway, one funny thing about getting older is watching every generation (including my own) act like they invented everything, and react with bemusement/horror as they, against all expectations, get older, get married, have kids, etc., just like their parents and grandparents! "Dear NY Times Style Magazine: I never thought this would happen to me, but..."
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:18 AM on April 16, 2016 [13 favorites]
Wait.
Can someone smarter and more sober than me (I have been drinking *with my cats*) some up with a pity phrase we can use: staycation -> stayboozening is as far as I got.
#stayboozening ain't gonna trend.
posted by Mezentian at 8:18 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
Can someone smarter and more sober than me (I have been drinking *with my cats*) some up with a pity phrase we can use: staycation -> stayboozening is as far as I got.
#stayboozening ain't gonna trend.
posted by Mezentian at 8:18 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
Awesome! I'm on trend for the first time in my life.
posted by Nanukthedog at 8:22 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Nanukthedog at 8:22 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
some coat curry
Goat curry, actually. Coat curry sounds nasty.
posted by jonmc at 8:27 AM on April 16, 2016
Goat curry, actually. Coat curry sounds nasty.
posted by jonmc at 8:27 AM on April 16, 2016
> #stayboozening ain't gonna trend.
You could just tell people you had the best seat in the house, ordered bottle service all night, and the DJ was amazing...
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:28 AM on April 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
You could just tell people you had the best seat in the house, ordered bottle service all night, and the DJ was amazing...
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:28 AM on April 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
You could just tell people you had the best seat in the house, ordered bottle service all night, and the DJ was amazing...
I did that.
If you know the code, that playlist is on Google.
#MostExclusiveClubNight.
posted by Mezentian at 8:30 AM on April 16, 2016
I did that.
If you know the code, that playlist is on Google.
#MostExclusiveClubNight.
posted by Mezentian at 8:30 AM on April 16, 2016
On Saturdays I usually do my heaviest gym day and clean the house while also doing the big personal upkeep things (exfoliation, face masks, yoga, whatever) then on Sunday's I go down to the pub and eat a burger and have a lager or three while doing the crossword with my husband and gossiping with the ex showgirl/mystery writer bartender , then we go home and nap. I usually clear out the fridge with a big stew. We don't go out on the weekends, that used to literally be my job and I can't take crowds anymore.
How's that work for you NYT?
posted by The Whelk at 8:35 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
How's that work for you NYT?
posted by The Whelk at 8:35 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
Anyone remember how, back in the old days, it was normal to spend all morning on Sunday lounging around, drinking coffee and reading the entire Sunday New York Times? And people subscribed to lots of paper magazines? I was broke when I lived in New York, so I checked out lots of books from the library, and then I read them, sometimes in coffee shops and on the subway but also at home. There was no Netflix, but there were video rental places. If you lived in a city, there were great video rental places. If you lived in Chicago, there was Facets.
I have always been more of a homebody than the average bear, and I'm sure that there were people whose lives were non-stop clubbing and gallery openings, but I actually think that plenty of people did plenty of stuff at home. And a lot of New York going-out was motivated by the fact that people lived in tiny, tiny apartments, rather than by some innate impulse to socialize all the time.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 8:36 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
I have always been more of a homebody than the average bear, and I'm sure that there were people whose lives were non-stop clubbing and gallery openings, but I actually think that plenty of people did plenty of stuff at home. And a lot of New York going-out was motivated by the fact that people lived in tiny, tiny apartments, rather than by some innate impulse to socialize all the time.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 8:36 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
NYT trend piece, so of course there are weasel words to beat the band and all the associated snark-able content.
But I found her analogy of chronic staying in : managing emotional state :: stashing money in savings account : managing wealth to be a silly, pretty blatant apples-and-oranges scenario... but equally arresting and thought provoking. I found myself kicking around this analogy for a while. A modestly redeeming thought exercise for an NYT trendpiece! Thumbs up, Molly Young, for that.
posted by Theophrastus Johnson at 8:37 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
But I found her analogy of chronic staying in : managing emotional state :: stashing money in savings account : managing wealth to be a silly, pretty blatant apples-and-oranges scenario... but equally arresting and thought provoking. I found myself kicking around this analogy for a while. A modestly redeeming thought exercise for an NYT trendpiece! Thumbs up, Molly Young, for that.
posted by Theophrastus Johnson at 8:37 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
How's that work for you NYT?
I would watch the pilot for your Sex and the City.
Just the pilot.
Maybe the episode where you went to see Guy and his donkey wings.
But, mostly the pilot.
posted by Mezentian at 8:38 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I would watch the pilot for your Sex and the City.
Just the pilot.
Maybe the episode where you went to see Guy and his donkey wings.
But, mostly the pilot.
posted by Mezentian at 8:38 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
thank god some people upthread mentioned (lack of) money more in depth because that's the #1 reason I and my bf don't do anything (that the author would probably consider A Thing) on weekends. there is a literal cost-benefit analysis of every activity, and typically what we end up doing is a mix of working out on our 10 year old exercise equipment in the basement, driving somewhere nearby and walking like 8 miles, playing some video games, maybe watching some tv/a movie, and having a couple of beers served from our refrigerator.
the fact that money wasn't even mentioned in the article at all is ridiculous for people in my age group (yeah, yeah, I know... we're millenials). yeah some of our friends go out to bars and sometimes they drag us out with them but, hilariously, invariably the topic of conversation includes some form of 'i'm spending too much money tonight and shouldn't do this as often'. sometimes we do go to board game parties hosted at a friend's house, not sure if that's considered Going Out to the author or not.
anyway. netflix/hulu/etc. are cost-effective as sources of entertainment. cooking in is cheaper than eating out. I have no doubt a large part of this 'trend' among many younger people is from necessity.
posted by suddenly, and without warning, at 8:41 AM on April 16, 2016
the fact that money wasn't even mentioned in the article at all is ridiculous for people in my age group (yeah, yeah, I know... we're millenials). yeah some of our friends go out to bars and sometimes they drag us out with them but, hilariously, invariably the topic of conversation includes some form of 'i'm spending too much money tonight and shouldn't do this as often'. sometimes we do go to board game parties hosted at a friend's house, not sure if that's considered Going Out to the author or not.
anyway. netflix/hulu/etc. are cost-effective as sources of entertainment. cooking in is cheaper than eating out. I have no doubt a large part of this 'trend' among many younger people is from necessity.
posted by suddenly, and without warning, at 8:41 AM on April 16, 2016
> #MostExclusiveClubNight.
I put the "I" in "VIP".
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:42 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
I put the "I" in "VIP".
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:42 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
there is a literal cost-benefit analysis of every activity
It depends where you live. In NYC, I can go to a museum, go for a run in Central Park, go kayaking in the summer, go to a concert, etc. for free.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 8:42 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
It depends where you live. In NYC, I can go to a museum, go for a run in Central Park, go kayaking in the summer, go to a concert, etc. for free.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 8:42 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
There is the thing where a lot of these "self care" stuff sounds exactly like when I'm entering a depressive state and low key crying out for help. Add in the No One Has Any Money anexity and you get s nation of spooky, nervous people at home alone.
(Don't worry it's just prep work for when the weather means no one can leave the house)
posted by The Whelk at 8:48 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
(Don't worry it's just prep work for when the weather means no one can leave the house)
posted by The Whelk at 8:48 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
All snarking aside, I did relate to this part:
Going out, on the other hand, is closer to prospecting. The upside is huge: You could have a life-altering adventure, meet your soul mate, find your new best friend. The potential downside is equally monumental.
Back in the day, when I was home from university for the summer I would almost always go out on Wednesday nights (Wednesday was the big night out in my hometown for some stupid reason) to the same crappy bar featuring a set by some lousy cover band with the same high school friends I was barely friends with anymore because I was bored as shit and I reasoned that if I stayed home there was a 0% chance of something fun happening and if I went out the chance was...well, not much higher than 0%, but at least 1%. Nothing ever really happened, but I guess that's prospecting for you.
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:51 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
Going out, on the other hand, is closer to prospecting. The upside is huge: You could have a life-altering adventure, meet your soul mate, find your new best friend. The potential downside is equally monumental.
Back in the day, when I was home from university for the summer I would almost always go out on Wednesday nights (Wednesday was the big night out in my hometown for some stupid reason) to the same crappy bar featuring a set by some lousy cover band with the same high school friends I was barely friends with anymore because I was bored as shit and I reasoned that if I stayed home there was a 0% chance of something fun happening and if I went out the chance was...well, not much higher than 0%, but at least 1%. Nothing ever really happened, but I guess that's prospecting for you.
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:51 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
#stayinebriation
posted by howfar at 8:52 AM on April 16, 2016 [26 favorites]
posted by howfar at 8:52 AM on April 16, 2016 [26 favorites]
#stayinebriation
Shut Vegas DOWN.
We have a winner.
posted by Mezentian at 9:11 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Shut Vegas DOWN.
We have a winner.
posted by Mezentian at 9:11 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Two problems with going out on the weekend:
1. No one goes there anymore, it's too crowded
2. As someone else mentioned above, the good shows are on weeknights
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 9:11 AM on April 16, 2016
1. No one goes there anymore, it's too crowded
2. As someone else mentioned above, the good shows are on weeknights
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 9:11 AM on April 16, 2016
Anyway, one funny thing about getting older is watching every generation (including my own) act like they invented everything, and react with bemusement/horror as they, against all expectations, get older, get married, have kids, etc., just like their parents and grandparents!
I started feeling old when I started referring to all video game consoles as Nintendos.
posted by Pope Guilty at 9:12 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
I started feeling old when I started referring to all video game consoles as Nintendos.
posted by Pope Guilty at 9:12 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
As someone else mentioned above, the good shows are on weeknights
Surely the only reason shows are on weeknights is because all the interesting bands want to be in Hip City come the weekend?
posted by Mezentian at 9:14 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Surely the only reason shows are on weeknights is because all the interesting bands want to be in Hip City come the weekend?
posted by Mezentian at 9:14 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I started feeling old when I started referring to all video game consoles as Nintendos.
*strokes Hanimex*
My Atari 2600 has a fine wooden finish and .... Fine Wooden Finish.
(Yes, I have a Hanimex).
posted by Mezentian at 9:16 AM on April 16, 2016
*strokes Hanimex*
My Atari 2600 has a fine wooden finish and .... Fine Wooden Finish.
(Yes, I have a Hanimex).
posted by Mezentian at 9:16 AM on April 16, 2016
Molly Young used to curate a tumblr that I very much enjoyed, Magic Molly.
I think the piece is more about growing up into one's introvertedness than about any real trend for young things, or even being poor. When you're an introvert in college or just out of college, you (or at least I did) imagine that if you put on the makeup and the nice blouse and went out that something amazing would happen. Over time, you realize this is far more unlikely than it would seem from movies and TV. The new staying in technology is just the enabler.
posted by permiechickie at 9:29 AM on April 16, 2016 [14 favorites]
I think the piece is more about growing up into one's introvertedness than about any real trend for young things, or even being poor. When you're an introvert in college or just out of college, you (or at least I did) imagine that if you put on the makeup and the nice blouse and went out that something amazing would happen. Over time, you realize this is far more unlikely than it would seem from movies and TV. The new staying in technology is just the enabler.
posted by permiechickie at 9:29 AM on April 16, 2016 [14 favorites]
Mezentian--perhaps it's the flip-side of that for me since I live in LA and tend to like smaller shows?
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 9:36 AM on April 16, 2016
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 9:36 AM on April 16, 2016
I do fuckall on my weekends because my weekend is Monday and Tuesday. There's virtually nothing to do, because the world is built for M-F 9-5 people. Most of my friends are either those people, or are fellow cooking people who just want to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:46 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:46 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yeah if yer a freelancer or have an other non m-f schedule why would you EVER go out on a weekend that's when EVERYONE ELSE IS OUT
posted by The Whelk at 9:50 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by The Whelk at 9:50 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
And weekdays are often field trips to museums etc which, no.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:54 AM on April 16, 2016
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:54 AM on April 16, 2016
I do fuckall on my weekends because my weekend is Monday and Tuesday. There's virtually nothing to do, because the world is built for M-F 9-5 people.
But the world's beer gardens are built for you.
When I was a carefree young binge drinker, working mostly late nights and weekends, I enjoyed nothing more than slumping over tapas and 2-for-1 cocktails on a Monday lunchtime, watching other people chasing about clutching a Tesco "meal" deal sandwich and crisps.
posted by howfar at 9:56 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
But the world's beer gardens are built for you.
When I was a carefree young binge drinker, working mostly late nights and weekends, I enjoyed nothing more than slumping over tapas and 2-for-1 cocktails on a Monday lunchtime, watching other people chasing about clutching a Tesco "meal" deal sandwich and crisps.
posted by howfar at 9:56 AM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
My grandfather was right - nothing good happens after 11pm
Not quite, I once made out with the then current face of Prada after 11.
posted by The Whelk at 10:10 AM on April 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
Not quite, I once made out with the then current face of Prada after 11.
posted by The Whelk at 10:10 AM on April 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
I sang "Bohemian Rhapsody" with about 60 of my friends at midnight karaoke a few days ago. It was pretty great.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:14 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:14 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I'd push that deadline back to the more traditional 2:00 AM, and even then I had my moments...
posted by The Card Cheat at 10:17 AM on April 16, 2016
posted by The Card Cheat at 10:17 AM on April 16, 2016
(I mean, I was trying to be frugal and I still spent enough to scare myself a little. I was out for six hours, and I had two beers ($16) and a cocktail that someone ordered me before I had a chance to see the price ($20) and the cheapest pub meal on the menu ($14), and I took public transport both ways ($12) even though that involved a 30 minute walk from the station at 1am. And my evening still cost $78 (including the $15 cover charge for the terrible band we were seeing.))
We had a dinner date last night, within walking distance so no parking or commute costs. A couple of drinks each, a shared appetizer, and entrees still cost almost $100 with tip, and that was just a low-key dinner at a pub and home after 8, not a fancy place or a long evening where you stumble home in the wee hours. I earn an ok salary but I can't afford to do that too many nights in a row, and for people just starting out or in low salary situations even a basic evening out like that isn't going to be much of an option.
I can vividly remember that sinking feeling I used to get when the bill would arrive and something would turn out to have cost more than I had thought. It doesn't take too many instances of that to take a lot of the fun out of going out.
posted by Dip Flash at 10:22 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
We had a dinner date last night, within walking distance so no parking or commute costs. A couple of drinks each, a shared appetizer, and entrees still cost almost $100 with tip, and that was just a low-key dinner at a pub and home after 8, not a fancy place or a long evening where you stumble home in the wee hours. I earn an ok salary but I can't afford to do that too many nights in a row, and for people just starting out or in low salary situations even a basic evening out like that isn't going to be much of an option.
I can vividly remember that sinking feeling I used to get when the bill would arrive and something would turn out to have cost more than I had thought. It doesn't take too many instances of that to take a lot of the fun out of going out.
posted by Dip Flash at 10:22 AM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Am I so out of touch? No, it is the children who are wrong.
posted by sourwookie at 10:22 AM on April 16, 2016 [11 favorites]
posted by sourwookie at 10:22 AM on April 16, 2016 [11 favorites]
Not quite, I once made out with the then current face of Prada after 11.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:27 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:27 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Even little things can change the "going out" calculus. I used to live in New York, and knew that I could get back home from pretty much anywhere in the city at any hour of the night for basically no cost, as I already had a monthly Metrocard.
Now I live in Portland, where there is literally no overnight transit service (seriously, Portland, what the fuck) so if I go out somewhere that's not walking distance back to my apartment (and being an ex-New Yorker, "walking distance" for me is a pretty wide radius, a couple of miles at least) I have to either get a ride from someone or take Lyft or a cab and pay $12-15.
posted by Automocar at 10:28 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
Now I live in Portland, where there is literally no overnight transit service (seriously, Portland, what the fuck) so if I go out somewhere that's not walking distance back to my apartment (and being an ex-New Yorker, "walking distance" for me is a pretty wide radius, a couple of miles at least) I have to either get a ride from someone or take Lyft or a cab and pay $12-15.
posted by Automocar at 10:28 AM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
So all these people clogging up the San Francisco sidewalks in the evenings are either walking to work or tourists, right?
posted by ananci at 11:09 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by ananci at 11:09 AM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Whenever anyone at work asks me what I'm going to do this weekend I say "Catch up on sleep." It has the double benefit of being unabashedly true and a complete conversation stopper to boot. Everyone at work, like me, is either completely overworked or suffers from sleep apnea, so there is not a lack of comprehension as to why extra sleep might be an appropriate weekend activity. It's not to say I never go out. But when I think about, all other things being equal, what I'd rather do, the answer is clear.
posted by blucevalo at 11:13 AM on April 16, 2016
posted by blucevalo at 11:13 AM on April 16, 2016
> "why are there so many Spiderman movies?"
I am starting to find them threatening. Or possibly menacing.
posted by kyrademon at 11:24 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
I am starting to find them threatening. Or possibly menacing.
posted by kyrademon at 11:24 AM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Hi I'm in a bar right now and it's 7.24pm! In my 20s I was the last one standing now I am catching up with some people and then leaving at 8.30 so I can go home and put on my jammies and drink gin which is not one million pounds and watch some tv! Sat-ur-day night woop!!!
posted by billiebee at 11:25 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by billiebee at 11:25 AM on April 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
So all these people clogging up the San Francisco sidewalks in the evenings are either walking to work or tourists, right?They're looking down at apps that tell them which errands to run for people who are in their apartments building new apps that will send other people to run errands for people who stay home building apps.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 11:29 AM on April 16, 2016 [18 favorites]
Sometimes I go out.
Sometimes I stay in.
At no time do I consider either to be particularly interesting to the world at large.
posted by kyrademon at 11:35 AM on April 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
Sometimes I stay in.
At no time do I consider either to be particularly interesting to the world at large.
posted by kyrademon at 11:35 AM on April 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
I know when to go out. I know when to stay in. Get things done.
Come on this has been settled since '83 people.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 11:40 AM on April 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
Come on this has been settled since '83 people.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 11:40 AM on April 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
It's pretty weird that the author is reading so much into this on a generational level. Some people are introverted, just don't like bars that much, can't afford/don't think it's worth the cost, or all of the above. I'm not convinced by her anecdotal experience that people of a given age go out less now than people of the same age did 10 years ago in the first place, but if she's right that they do, maybe she could consider looking into what their actual reasons are instead of assuming it's all because of Evil Technology....
I've always been like this before it was supposedly "the new thing", though I go out a bit less now at 29 than I did at 20 - mostly because I'm not looking for a date and because the novelty of getting wasted has passed. Many of my friends still go out to bars all the time. I just prefer to do other things. On that note, it's also pretty weird that restaurants and bars and "events" are apparently the only activities that count as "going out". No mention of hiking, weekend trips, sports, hobbies, visiting friends' houses/inviting people over, doing artistic stuff, walking in the park, etc etc etc? That's how I get most of my social time in. Though I do still prefer to stay in the house probably 3/4 weekends, and I don't really see a problem with that.
I know what I'm "losing", and more importantly, I know what I'm gaining. Staying in might be a guilty pleasure for her but it's not for me. It's a deliberate choice, because I know myself well enough to know that most nights, I will be more unhappy if I go out. I guess she's part of that obnoxious subset of extroverts who can't believe that not everyone is like them, and that some people would genuinely be happier staying at home than going out to a big party.
posted by randomnity at 11:55 AM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
I've always been like this before it was supposedly "the new thing", though I go out a bit less now at 29 than I did at 20 - mostly because I'm not looking for a date and because the novelty of getting wasted has passed. Many of my friends still go out to bars all the time. I just prefer to do other things. On that note, it's also pretty weird that restaurants and bars and "events" are apparently the only activities that count as "going out". No mention of hiking, weekend trips, sports, hobbies, visiting friends' houses/inviting people over, doing artistic stuff, walking in the park, etc etc etc? That's how I get most of my social time in. Though I do still prefer to stay in the house probably 3/4 weekends, and I don't really see a problem with that.
I know what I'm "losing", and more importantly, I know what I'm gaining. Staying in might be a guilty pleasure for her but it's not for me. It's a deliberate choice, because I know myself well enough to know that most nights, I will be more unhappy if I go out. I guess she's part of that obnoxious subset of extroverts who can't believe that not everyone is like them, and that some people would genuinely be happier staying at home than going out to a big party.
posted by randomnity at 11:55 AM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
As was mentioned by several folks up thread, I work weekends. It has to be something I really want to do to dig me out of my apartment to waste work week time on. Also, I'm old. Also I'm introverted. Trifecta! Ehh, punk rock is old and codified, I've got no interest in watching some kids run through the same chords I did when I was their age. I got nothing against the kids either staying in or going out. They should find the fun that works for them. I know I didn't care about other peoples opinions when I was 20 something (like I do now, HA!) And NYT Trend pieces are a nice way to waste a couple of minutes, not something to actually be concerned with. Right now I'm at work watching a late season snow storm. When I go home I've got meatballs and red sauce waiting for me, a comfy chair, and my cat. Sounds like heaven.
posted by evilDoug at 12:12 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by evilDoug at 12:12 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
On Friday, once the kids were asleep, I settled in with whatever-the-fuck wine was left in the fridge and finally watched Star Wars The Force Awakens. Later in the night, my toddler climbed into my bed and ended up peeing himself. So my weekend so far has been: lots of loud crazy shit, alcohol, and inappropriate urination. It's like I'm still in college, but totally not.
posted by Kabanos at 12:27 PM on April 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by Kabanos at 12:27 PM on April 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
permiechickie: Molly Young used to curate a tumblr
She still has one, but with a new name: mollyyoung.tumblr.com
posted by pjenks at 12:50 PM on April 16, 2016
She still has one, but with a new name: mollyyoung.tumblr.com
posted by pjenks at 12:50 PM on April 16, 2016
My theory: Staying In is the new Going Out, but Going Out is the new Staying In.
posted by kyrademon at 1:00 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by kyrademon at 1:00 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
what if we Go Sideways?
posted by The Whelk at 1:12 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by The Whelk at 1:12 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yeah, I mean, winter is just ending in New York and the eastern and middle parts of the United States (well, I mean, it's the end of winter everywhere in the Northern Hemisphere, but it's still COLD here in the Midwest). Who wants to put on the heavy coat and boots once you get in from the cold?
Although my husband and I ARE going out tonight! It's finally getting warm, and we are going to a micro-grants dinner, where we pay for dinner and presentations from the heads of local initiatives, and then we all vote on which project gets the door money as a grant.
Normally, though, yeah, weekends are for grocery shopping and laundry.
posted by chainsofreedom at 1:31 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Although my husband and I ARE going out tonight! It's finally getting warm, and we are going to a micro-grants dinner, where we pay for dinner and presentations from the heads of local initiatives, and then we all vote on which project gets the door money as a grant.
Normally, though, yeah, weekends are for grocery shopping and laundry.
posted by chainsofreedom at 1:31 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
what if we Go Sideways?
But I hate merlot.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 1:38 PM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
But I hate merlot.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 1:38 PM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
Reminds me of a single-panel comic I saw recently: "How was your weekend?" "Light. Dark. Light. Dark. Monday."
posted by uosuaq at 2:23 PM on April 16, 2016 [9 favorites]
posted by uosuaq at 2:23 PM on April 16, 2016 [9 favorites]
I work from home so Going Out* is necessary for my mental health and I try to do it most nights. I'm a cheap date and my bar is pretty low. Like "I-put-on-a-dress-to-walk-to-the-co-op-and-listened-to-a-busking-Klezmer-band-on-the-porch-of-the-bar-next-door-for-a-minute-and-called-it-going-out" low
posted by thivaia at 2:36 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by thivaia at 2:36 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
NYT trend piece
Has there been a NYT Trend Piece since the founding of MetaFilter that contains any more truth or logic than a Donald Trump campaign speech (albeit a completely separate set of lies and illogic)?
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:08 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Has there been a NYT Trend Piece since the founding of MetaFilter that contains any more truth or logic than a Donald Trump campaign speech (albeit a completely separate set of lies and illogic)?
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:08 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
We furrow our brows trying to remember key events, but nothing comes to mind
Not that many people care what I did over a weekend, but I could describe it to them, in precise detail, to anyone who really wanted to know. I'm thinking the "not much, you?" is merely a politeness, like "How are you? Fine. Thanks." Anyone who really can't remember how they spent weekend should put down the bong and the video games and the Netflix.
posted by octobersurprise at 3:12 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Not that many people care what I did over a weekend, but I could describe it to them, in precise detail, to anyone who really wanted to know. I'm thinking the "not much, you?" is merely a politeness, like "How are you? Fine. Thanks." Anyone who really can't remember how they spent weekend should put down the bong and the video games and the Netflix.
posted by octobersurprise at 3:12 PM on April 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
why are there so many Spiderman movies?
If you consider that the world is 4.2 billion years old, there really aren't that many Spiderman movies.
However, there are too few weekends.
posted by GenjiandProust at 3:22 PM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
If you consider that the world is 4.2 billion years old, there really aren't that many Spiderman movies.
However, there are too few weekends.
posted by GenjiandProust at 3:22 PM on April 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
what this really goes back to is David Bowie's death. Now who among us knows when to go out or when to stay in and get things done?
posted by Krom Tatman at 3:28 PM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by Krom Tatman at 3:28 PM on April 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
This is why being a musician is awesome. We "go out" pretty infrequently but I spend a fair amount of time getting paid to hang out in bars and that generally includes a cider or two. What I'm saying is, did you tip the band?
posted by OverlappingElvis at 3:52 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by OverlappingElvis at 3:52 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Hey Kabanos, I feel it. Spouse was working, so I stayed home Friday with my two kids, and finally watched The Force Awakens. With a big bowl of Singapore rice noodles, and a martini for dessert. I'm fairly sure that, while it would have been nicer to see on the Big Screen, my way was more fun and cheaper to boot.
posted by Ella Fynoe at 4:10 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Ella Fynoe at 4:10 PM on April 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
We are practically empty nesters (2 kids in college) and we go out way more now than at any time in the last 20 odd years.
posted by COD at 4:17 PM on April 16, 2016
posted by COD at 4:17 PM on April 16, 2016
> "If you consider that the world is 4.2 billion years old, there really aren't that many Spiderman movies."
You don't think it's a little weird that once every six hundred million years, on average, someone says, "Hey, let's make a film where a guy is bitten by a spider and gets spider powers"?
posted by kyrademon at 5:54 PM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
You don't think it's a little weird that once every six hundred million years, on average, someone says, "Hey, let's make a film where a guy is bitten by a spider and gets spider powers"?
posted by kyrademon at 5:54 PM on April 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
Considering spiders have only been around 380 million years, it *is* a little odd...
posted by Zalzidrax at 7:52 PM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Zalzidrax at 7:52 PM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
I am frustrated that shows these days don't even start until 10. That means anyone I'm interested in seeing doesn't start until after midnight. Back in my day, young'ins, shows started at 8:30 so that by the time 10 o'clock rolled around there would be somebody that you wanted to listen to.
Starting at midnight means getting home after 2. Getting home after two means sleep at 2:45am and then a full day of feeling thrashed. So far no 1 1/2 hour performance has been worth a full day of feeling shitty and unproductive.
posted by small_ruminant at 7:53 PM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Starting at midnight means getting home after 2. Getting home after two means sleep at 2:45am and then a full day of feeling thrashed. So far no 1 1/2 hour performance has been worth a full day of feeling shitty and unproductive.
posted by small_ruminant at 7:53 PM on April 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
When I used to be in ...vaudeville. I guess, I was annoyed when my number was pushed back to 2:30not the 12:30 I was told so you just got drunk in the alleyway or basement and dealt with it
I don't need to stay out til 4 anymore I did that for money for yeeeears. Now if I I do it it's inside and near lots of couches.
posted by The Whelk at 9:13 PM on April 16, 2016
I don't need to stay out til 4 anymore I did that for money for yeeeears. Now if I I do it it's inside and near lots of couches.
posted by The Whelk at 9:13 PM on April 16, 2016
Spidermans Georg, who lives in a cave and makes over 10,000 Spiderman movies each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted.
posted by RobotHero at 9:22 PM on April 16, 2016 [9 favorites]
posted by RobotHero at 9:22 PM on April 16, 2016 [9 favorites]
I didn't see this essay so much as criticizing or being quizzical about but just straight up describing my life.
The thing I don't understand is if no one else is going out, and they're not watching tv, what are they doing. I know they're not watching tv because nobody I have ever met will admit to watching tv. If they have kids it's "My kids don't let us watch grown up shows." If they don't have kids, I don't know, they just don't.
posted by bleep at 11:30 PM on April 16, 2016
The thing I don't understand is if no one else is going out, and they're not watching tv, what are they doing. I know they're not watching tv because nobody I have ever met will admit to watching tv. If they have kids it's "My kids don't let us watch grown up shows." If they don't have kids, I don't know, they just don't.
posted by bleep at 11:30 PM on April 16, 2016
The thing I don't understand is if no one else is going out, and they're not watching tv, what are they doing.
playin vidya, mainly.
posted by Krom Tatman at 12:08 AM on April 17, 2016
playin vidya, mainly.
posted by Krom Tatman at 12:08 AM on April 17, 2016
The thing I don't understand is if no one else is going out, and they're not watching tv, what are they doing.
gardening
posted by Jacqueline at 4:18 AM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
gardening
posted by Jacqueline at 4:18 AM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
Netflix and meh.
posted by Fizz at 5:18 AM on April 17, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Fizz at 5:18 AM on April 17, 2016 [4 favorites]
The Times Magazine comes out every week and they can't print empty pages. Thus, this article.
posted by lupus_yonderboy at 2:34 PM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by lupus_yonderboy at 2:34 PM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
Not that many people care what I did over a weekend, but I could describe it to them, in precise detail, to anyone who really wanted to know. I'm thinking the "not much, you?" is merely a politeness, like "How are you? Fine. Thanks." Anyone who really can't remember how they spent weekend should put down the bong and the video games and the Netflix.
yeah really the "not much, just chilled" response is because I'm fairly sure the barista does not actually want to hear what I argued about on the internet
posted by Krom Tatman at 6:33 PM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
yeah really the "not much, just chilled" response is because I'm fairly sure the barista does not actually want to hear what I argued about on the internet
posted by Krom Tatman at 6:33 PM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
The thing I don't understand is if no one else is going out, and they're not watching tv, what are they doing.
Arguing with strangers and/or watching cat videos on the Internet, of course.
posted by SisterHavana at 8:08 PM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
Arguing with strangers and/or watching cat videos on the Internet, of course.
posted by SisterHavana at 8:08 PM on April 17, 2016 [1 favorite]
"rise of city-dwellers staying in is hard to quantify"
Indeed, no evidence is whatsoever is presented that this is happening.
posted by aspersioncast at 8:36 AM on April 18, 2016
Indeed, no evidence is whatsoever is presented that this is happening.
posted by aspersioncast at 8:36 AM on April 18, 2016
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posted by signal at 7:04 AM on April 16, 2016 [9 favorites]