Products as far as the eye can scroll
May 13, 2016 11:48 AM   Subscribe

Akvariums! Robot-Hund! Star Wars merchandise! A sort of mail-order Sharper Image kind of store, www.ARNGREN.net offers many, many products and rejects modern design sensibilities by putting quite a few of them on their front page in a vast, scroll-requiring field of boxes.
posted by ignignokt (10 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
Can't tell if this is a parody or a relic.
posted by EndsOfInvention at 11:56 AM on May 13, 2016


The blinking, moving Christmas scene at the bottom of the page makes it.
posted by bibliogrrl at 11:56 AM on May 13, 2016 [2 favorites]


I'm tempted to open the DOM explorer and see what the HTML looks like, but I'm also tempted to maintain my sanity. Decisions, decisions.
posted by benito.strauss at 12:16 PM on May 13, 2016 [2 favorites]


Scroll across and find the hilariously NSFW surprise.
posted by lagomorphius at 12:31 PM on May 13, 2016


what the HTML looks like

It looks like Angelfire has sex with an entire webring of born-again christian hobby sites.

My favorite feature is when you click on the Union Jack, expecting English, you instead get sent to a page hawking giant, bulky translators that maybe your dad bought at Radio Shack supposedly for that trip to Italy that never happened. You were relieved the trip fizzled out because you would be mortified the moment your family sat down at a cafe that didn't have English menus and your Pop, with little or no shame, reaches into his fanny pack to pull out the Grouper-size Babel Fish and says, "Oh don't worry kids, I got this."
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 12:35 PM on May 13, 2016 [3 favorites]


You took LING'S CARS
and you LOOPED IT,
you LOOPED IT
posted by Smart Dalek at 12:54 PM on May 13, 2016 [2 favorites]


nice try, but this is obviously a Desty Nova joint and I like my brain right where it is thank you very much
posted by prize bull octorok at 1:21 PM on May 13, 2016


It looks like one of those full-page Olympic Sales Kids Club ads I remember from '80s magazines and comics. Did anyone here ever take the bait and sell for one of these?
posted by Strange Interlude at 1:33 PM on May 13, 2016 [1 favorite]


what the HTML looks like
It looks like Angelfire has sex with an entire webring of born-again christian hobby sites.


It seems to have been built with Yahoo Site Builder.
Speaking of NSFW:

Description :
You can't have Jenna Jameson !
nless, of course, you order her from us.
Jenna Jameson is the most popular adult superstar
of our time and now you can have her
as your very own !
Arngren.net offers you an exclusive version of
Jenna Jameson wearing a white witch costume
complete with cool spider-web design. Nice !
Imagine Jenna all dressed up for Halloween, would
she be a good witch or a bad witch ?
This exclusive action figure stands 20 cm tall and
is a limited edition of 1,200 pieces.
Ages 18 and up. Recommended for mature
collectors due to her removable costume !

Klassy.

According to Wiki, she stopped doing porn in 2007. This almost feels like a relic from the Geocities-era... and yet....

I was trying to figure out what arngren was, which led me here, and that led me here.

And I have determined this dude is Frithjof Arngren, The Electronic Gadget King of Scandinavia!

They have has some criticism over their website.

In the eighties was Frithjof Arngren king of Norwegian mailboxes with its mail order catalog, where he sold unlikely products (how about a flying car?) For prices ending in 99, -. Now all his catalog posted online - including design.
posted by Mezentian at 9:42 PM on May 13, 2016 [1 favorite]


It makes so much sense that this is a translation of a giant mail-order catalog!
posted by ignignokt at 6:03 PM on May 14, 2016


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