The age of soothing imagery and blue liquid is dead.
June 5, 2016 9:24 PM Subscribe
But can they pour red liquid onto a little white pad on TV yet?
posted by stolyarova at 9:37 PM on June 5, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by stolyarova at 9:37 PM on June 5, 2016 [7 favorites]
I'm feeling...not so fresh
posted by thelonius at 9:56 PM on June 5, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by thelonius at 9:56 PM on June 5, 2016 [1 favorite]
But you still have to ride a horse or dance or something, right? It doesn't just happen, you need to exert yourself. Which seems to me such a biological injustice, first that this has to happen at all, and then that half of the population has to do krav maga or free climbing just to get it over with.
posted by Tad Naff at 10:32 PM on June 5, 2016 [13 favorites]
posted by Tad Naff at 10:32 PM on June 5, 2016 [13 favorites]
The youtube comments point out that the song is Native Puppy Love by A Tribe Called Red, who we've had a few posts about. It's fun to see them pop up in weird places.
posted by LobsterMitten at 10:47 PM on June 5, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by LobsterMitten at 10:47 PM on June 5, 2016 [6 favorites]
That poor dancer's toes.... and the sound as she peels back the strapping. Ugh. Everything else seems as sweetness and light by comparison now. :)
posted by adamt at 11:12 PM on June 5, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by adamt at 11:12 PM on June 5, 2016 [3 favorites]
Holy crap. That is the baddest ass ever commercial and the first one that has not made me feel guilty for sitting on my couch 16 hours a day.
posted by bendy at 11:27 PM on June 5, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by bendy at 11:27 PM on June 5, 2016 [2 favorites]
Seriously, I loved that! I - possibly like many other females - am a tiny bit embarrased about the period. But yeah, we bleed for so many reasons. Everyone does.
posted by bendy at 11:30 PM on June 5, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by bendy at 11:30 PM on June 5, 2016 [5 favorites]
That was cool as fuck. I've never bled from sports (unless you count going on a pub crawl in ill-fitting high heels) but it's ridiculously uplifting to watch those bad-ass women and see the word "blood" in a period advert. It shouldn't be - it should be the most obvious word to use in a towel/tampon advert for fucks sake, what the hell else are they even for? - but this feels huge. Of course now I have the old Bodyform jingle in my head for the next 24 hours but it's a small price to pay, and remembering those ads from when I was a teenager compared to this is kind of mind blowing.
posted by billiebee at 12:13 AM on June 6, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by billiebee at 12:13 AM on June 6, 2016 [8 favorites]
That is actually a pretty awesome commercial. Neat that it points out that it's just blood. And the sooner we get away from mythologizing and making menstruation into a big deal, the better.
posted by happyroach at 12:14 AM on June 6, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by happyroach at 12:14 AM on June 6, 2016 [6 favorites]
Mod note: A couple of comments deleted. Let's try to avoid "what are some ads about men?" derails, or similar. Thanks.
posted by taz (staff) at 12:26 AM on June 6, 2016 [15 favorites]
posted by taz (staff) at 12:26 AM on June 6, 2016 [15 favorites]
Not to be pedantic, but...bleeding from a cut and menstrual discharge are pretty much completely different things. And they leave the body for different reasons. The former, for just being female; the other, for being a badass athlete/warrior or something? Don't get me wrong, I like the empowerment message but...hmmm.
posted by zardoz at 12:27 AM on June 6, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by zardoz at 12:27 AM on June 6, 2016 [4 favorites]
What's your point Zardoz? It's hardly a differentiation the 'if it bleeds for three days or more and doesn't die, you should kill it'* crew make. Or the 'lols you're so emotional' crew. Or even the 'delicate lady problems' club. They all call it blood, and it's always that particularly feminine kind of bleeding that is seen as gross.
And honestly, I'm unathletic as fuck and my kid is following in her mama's footsteps, but we've both got scarred up knees from running, I've got scars on the back of my hands from netball, I've bust my face open playing softball and volleyball, my kid does her elbows and knees pretty regularly from playground sports. I love this, and all the 'get moving' ads Australia is doing, and the sweating ones from the UK, because they all break through this taboo about women's bodies being abject sites of disgust, for doing very normal everyday things like bleeding and sweating and grunting.
Bleeding and keeping going is a sign of power in sport, and in most things, unless you're female and it's your period in which case UGH GROSS NO-ONE WANTS TO KNOW JUST SHUT UP. And suffer.
When a squat pushes out a blood clot the size of a small clementine, you better fucking believe I'm putting in some extra effort dudebro isn't. I'm tired of that effort being ignored because 'ew yuck'. I'm tired of the way it's treated like shit, quite literally.
I've taken to being very open about my period - it makes a difference with how I view friendships. But it also had an unexpected side effect - because my husband has been ground zero for uterine nonsense, when one of his workers had to call in because of 'lady problems' he was not only comfortable saying 'you don't need to talk to my female admin unless you feel uncomfortable, I'm an adult, I can handle this' he also had enough knowledge to not say 'okay so you'll be back tomorrow' to a woman who is dealing with something a sight more difficult than 'overdid it at the gym' or 'stomach flu'.
*fuck you, you should worship me for staving off death morelike.
posted by geek anachronism at 12:54 AM on June 6, 2016 [50 favorites]
And honestly, I'm unathletic as fuck and my kid is following in her mama's footsteps, but we've both got scarred up knees from running, I've got scars on the back of my hands from netball, I've bust my face open playing softball and volleyball, my kid does her elbows and knees pretty regularly from playground sports. I love this, and all the 'get moving' ads Australia is doing, and the sweating ones from the UK, because they all break through this taboo about women's bodies being abject sites of disgust, for doing very normal everyday things like bleeding and sweating and grunting.
Bleeding and keeping going is a sign of power in sport, and in most things, unless you're female and it's your period in which case UGH GROSS NO-ONE WANTS TO KNOW JUST SHUT UP. And suffer.
When a squat pushes out a blood clot the size of a small clementine, you better fucking believe I'm putting in some extra effort dudebro isn't. I'm tired of that effort being ignored because 'ew yuck'. I'm tired of the way it's treated like shit, quite literally.
I've taken to being very open about my period - it makes a difference with how I view friendships. But it also had an unexpected side effect - because my husband has been ground zero for uterine nonsense, when one of his workers had to call in because of 'lady problems' he was not only comfortable saying 'you don't need to talk to my female admin unless you feel uncomfortable, I'm an adult, I can handle this' he also had enough knowledge to not say 'okay so you'll be back tomorrow' to a woman who is dealing with something a sight more difficult than 'overdid it at the gym' or 'stomach flu'.
*fuck you, you should worship me for staving off death morelike.
posted by geek anachronism at 12:54 AM on June 6, 2016 [50 favorites]
The ref for the rugby should really have done something about a bleeding headwound.
posted by biffa at 2:28 AM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by biffa at 2:28 AM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
In a generation, nobody will understand why “running along a beach in slow motion” was once a euphemism for menstruation.
posted by acb at 2:53 AM on June 6, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by acb at 2:53 AM on June 6, 2016 [12 favorites]
As someone in advertising, I really dislike this ad.
Partly because it looks like the creative team on this was entirely male (!!) and I would've given my right ovary to work on this brief.
Partly because every goddamned brief targetting women that goes across my desk uses the same 'I dunno, athleisure?' insight.
Partly because I think you'll find it's non-menstruating people who are uncomfortable about menstrual blood.
Partly because the website is just wildly condescending (tailor your exercise routine to your menstrual cycle? REALLY?)
And partly because, for some menstruating people, having a period is crippling in a very serious way.
I've seen this ad being broadly celebrated by my ad friends, but i just don't get it. There was an opportunity here to create genuinely insight-lead work, but instead a bunch of dudes just shrugged and made another 'empowering', 'if-she's-crying-she's-buying' Dovealike spot.
Signed, salty of London.
posted by nerdfish at 3:17 AM on June 6, 2016 [14 favorites]
Partly because it looks like the creative team on this was entirely male (!!) and I would've given my right ovary to work on this brief.
Partly because every goddamned brief targetting women that goes across my desk uses the same 'I dunno, athleisure?' insight.
Partly because I think you'll find it's non-menstruating people who are uncomfortable about menstrual blood.
Partly because the website is just wildly condescending (tailor your exercise routine to your menstrual cycle? REALLY?)
And partly because, for some menstruating people, having a period is crippling in a very serious way.
I've seen this ad being broadly celebrated by my ad friends, but i just don't get it. There was an opportunity here to create genuinely insight-lead work, but instead a bunch of dudes just shrugged and made another 'empowering', 'if-she's-crying-she's-buying' Dovealike spot.
Signed, salty of London.
posted by nerdfish at 3:17 AM on June 6, 2016 [14 favorites]
You know, periods involve the shedding of a lining. It actually involves pain in the vast majority of women. It's a workout for the uterus! So, this doesn't seem a reach at all.
The other period ad I liked was an Australian one that was like a dark murder mystery thingo where a woman uses a handy pad from her top desk drawer to soak up the tell-tale puddle of blood which is about to give everything away.
Blood blood blood (and a clot or two), that's what they're for!
posted by h00py at 3:50 AM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
The other period ad I liked was an Australian one that was like a dark murder mystery thingo where a woman uses a handy pad from her top desk drawer to soak up the tell-tale puddle of blood which is about to give everything away.
Blood blood blood (and a clot or two), that's what they're for!
posted by h00py at 3:50 AM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
Hell yes. I just showed this to my husband, who at first thought this was a Nike commercial full of badass women (until the horse appeared).
posted by third word on a random page at 4:28 AM on June 6, 2016
posted by third word on a random page at 4:28 AM on June 6, 2016
Youtube popped up an advertisement for Men's Fitness over the video. Context-sensitive advertisement placement: not there yet.
posted by Hogshead at 5:01 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Hogshead at 5:01 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
"In a generation, nobody will understand why “running along a beach in slow motion” was once a euphemism for menstruation."
Wait, is that what they were advertising? I remember the commercial but I never remembered ("remembered"? Is that a word?) what they were advertising.
posted by I-baLL at 5:15 AM on June 6, 2016
Wait, is that what they were advertising? I remember the commercial but I never remembered ("remembered"? Is that a word?) what they were advertising.
posted by I-baLL at 5:15 AM on June 6, 2016
That and flavoured caramel popcorn balls.
posted by h00py at 5:38 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by h00py at 5:38 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
I'm torn. It's cis normative and essentialising. But it's tackling shame and patriarchy simultaneously. So yeah, it's pretty great, I enjoyed it (I'm also drunk and watching q and a) . But how about a trans man in there?
On first (squiffy) watch, I liked it.
posted by taff at 5:47 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
On first (squiffy) watch, I liked it.
posted by taff at 5:47 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
I thought the ad was really effective in illustrating the absurd double standard about which "types" of blood are allowed to be depicted in public on TV or advertising. All the blood depicted is regularly shown without any kind of furore and yet there is this "other blood" that the company manufactures a product to manage and it can't depict.
Some of the complaints above seem to mis the point of the ad in my perspective. How else can you visually explain this idea quite so effectively?
These are all examples of "woman's blood"...
posted by mary8nne at 6:14 AM on June 6, 2016 [9 favorites]
Some of the complaints above seem to mis the point of the ad in my perspective. How else can you visually explain this idea quite so effectively?
These are all examples of "woman's blood"...
posted by mary8nne at 6:14 AM on June 6, 2016 [9 favorites]
Eugh, I just looked up the credits for a Kotex spot I actually really like ('Aunt Flo'), hoping that the team credited might include at least one female creative, but nope. Written by dudes. It doesn't detract from the fact that it's a really solid spot, but that, combined with the male team behind this spot, just makes me feel so goddamned deflated about this industry.
It's a pretty sad indictment of the industry if they bothered to scare up a female creative - even one! - to take on a goddamned tampon brief.
posted by nerdfish at 6:50 AM on June 6, 2016 [2 favorites]
It's a pretty sad indictment of the industry if they bothered to scare up a female creative - even one! - to take on a goddamned tampon brief.
posted by nerdfish at 6:50 AM on June 6, 2016 [2 favorites]
I've never bled from sports (unless you count going on a pub crawl in ill-fitting high heels)
Yes I do.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 7:29 AM on June 6, 2016 [4 favorites]
Yes I do.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 7:29 AM on June 6, 2016 [4 favorites]
Written by dudes.
Many years ago, I used to work for a magazine that went out to retail pharmacists. We'd go to industry functions from time to time, where we'd often find ourselves drinking with the marketing and advertising folk handling products our readers sold.
That's how I came to meet the brand manager for Tampax who was (of course) a man. His favourite joke was, "Mind you, I had to pull a few strings to get this job!"
posted by Paul Slade at 8:01 AM on June 6, 2016
Many years ago, I used to work for a magazine that went out to retail pharmacists. We'd go to industry functions from time to time, where we'd often find ourselves drinking with the marketing and advertising folk handling products our readers sold.
That's how I came to meet the brand manager for Tampax who was (of course) a man. His favourite joke was, "Mind you, I had to pull a few strings to get this job!"
posted by Paul Slade at 8:01 AM on June 6, 2016
nerdfish: the website is just wildly condescending (tailor your exercise routine to your menstrual cycle? REALLY?)
Of course! Don't you know that if you menstruate, all of your life should be all about your menstrual cycle? After all, we're entirely regulated and driven by our hormones and nothing else. [/vegaburger]
But yeah, there were nice things about the commercial as well as problematic aspects. The fact that a commercial for a menstrual product shows actual blood, and women doing other things than skipping around in white dresses, is... well, refreshing.
posted by Too-Ticky at 8:02 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
Of course! Don't you know that if you menstruate, all of your life should be all about your menstrual cycle? After all, we're entirely regulated and driven by our hormones and nothing else. [/vegaburger]
But yeah, there were nice things about the commercial as well as problematic aspects. The fact that a commercial for a menstrual product shows actual blood, and women doing other things than skipping around in white dresses, is... well, refreshing.
posted by Too-Ticky at 8:02 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
Ten years ago, I (a male) had to fight to mention "body wash" in a radio commercial because my (also male) bosses thought it was gross to mention a "feminine hygiene product" on the air (client was a retailer with a pharmacy in store).
I think this spot would have given them seizures.
posted by GhostintheMachine at 9:28 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
I think this spot would have given them seizures.
posted by GhostintheMachine at 9:28 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
tailor your exercise routine to your menstrual cycle? REALLY?
idk what is so horrible about this? acknowledging that your energy levels vary throughout your cycle? how is this condescending? god, if only i'd had some kind of backup for trying to explain to gym teachers that actually, the week BEFORE my period was way more horrible for me, exhaustion-wise, than the actual week OF my period. see also: when increasing pain levels did make it the worst thing ever, trying to explain that no, actually, exercise doesn't always make it better.
posted by poffin boffin at 10:17 AM on June 6, 2016 [8 favorites]
idk what is so horrible about this? acknowledging that your energy levels vary throughout your cycle? how is this condescending? god, if only i'd had some kind of backup for trying to explain to gym teachers that actually, the week BEFORE my period was way more horrible for me, exhaustion-wise, than the actual week OF my period. see also: when increasing pain levels did make it the worst thing ever, trying to explain that no, actually, exercise doesn't always make it better.
posted by poffin boffin at 10:17 AM on June 6, 2016 [8 favorites]
All these women, bleeding from their whatevers.
posted by emjaybee at 11:01 AM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by emjaybee at 11:01 AM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
Not having a menstrual cycle, I can't comment on the ad itself. But I can verify from observation at my kids' dance school that the feet of ballerinas on pointe are indeed horribly abused and often disgusting. Holy crap.
posted by Ben Trismegistus at 11:07 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Ben Trismegistus at 11:07 AM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
I don't see how not having a menstrual cycle would keep you from having an opinion about a commercial. Feel free, as far as I'm concerned. It's not like the commercial is all MENSTRUATION ALWAYS FEELS LIKE THIS.
posted by Too-Ticky at 11:56 AM on June 6, 2016
posted by Too-Ticky at 11:56 AM on June 6, 2016
Oh sure, I appreciate that. Any opinion I had, however, would not be based in experience, and therefore be of limited usefulness.
posted by Ben Trismegistus at 12:31 PM on June 6, 2016
posted by Ben Trismegistus at 12:31 PM on June 6, 2016
It's not like the commercial is all MENSTRUATION ALWAYS FEELS LIKE THIS.
1. First, imagine you have a uterus.
2. Now imagine blood leaking out of it that will stain everything you lie or sit on unless you use some sort of barrier to prevent it.
3. Next imagine your pecs are swollen and sore and you have to strap them into a bra every day or they hurt even worse.
4. Add some gut cramps, backaches, swollen feet, headaches, and mood swings and congratulations. That's (partly) how it feels.
(That first one is the toughest, admittedly.)
posted by emjaybee at 1:04 PM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
1. First, imagine you have a uterus.
2. Now imagine blood leaking out of it that will stain everything you lie or sit on unless you use some sort of barrier to prevent it.
3. Next imagine your pecs are swollen and sore and you have to strap them into a bra every day or they hurt even worse.
4. Add some gut cramps, backaches, swollen feet, headaches, and mood swings and congratulations. That's (partly) how it feels.
(That first one is the toughest, admittedly.)
posted by emjaybee at 1:04 PM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
... the commercial does not show not a single thing that has to do with menstruation, though. It shows women participating in various sports. Do you have any experience with sports? With being in a forest perhaps? Have you ever had a bloody nose? I don't think they're very different based on ones gender.
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:05 PM on June 6, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:05 PM on June 6, 2016 [2 favorites]
Native Puppy Love yt by A Tribe Called Red - nominative determinism anyone?
posted by The Seeds of Autumn at 3:47 PM on June 6, 2016
posted by The Seeds of Autumn at 3:47 PM on June 6, 2016
geek anachronism: I'm unathletic as fuck
we've both got scarred up knees from running, I've got scars on the back of my hands from netball, I've bust my face open playing softball and volleyball,
When a squat pushes out a blood clot the size of a small clementine
Jesus. If you're calling yourself unathletic, I hate to think what you'd call me.
"Lardo," probably. Or maybe "Tubbs."
posted by biogeo at 4:07 PM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
we've both got scarred up knees from running, I've got scars on the back of my hands from netball, I've bust my face open playing softball and volleyball,
When a squat pushes out a blood clot the size of a small clementine
Jesus. If you're calling yourself unathletic, I hate to think what you'd call me.
"Lardo," probably. Or maybe "Tubbs."
posted by biogeo at 4:07 PM on June 6, 2016 [1 favorite]
All those injuries were school-enforced sportsball. Well, except the running, that's just be being late for things and also clumsy as hell. See also: the scars all over my fingers from cooking.
And I only wish I were still lifting, damnable wobbly joints - which, FYI, was something I tailored around my menstrual cycle because at certain times I am more limber and have a lower pain tolerance. That's not being condescending, that's acknowledging the riot of hormones. Right now I'm 85kgs of soft squishiness in a 165cm frame that is super grateful for hormonal birth control also giving me the option of stopping my period so I don't have yet another long haul flight while bleeding profusely. I did that exactly once and there is NO advice online about it. None. Bunches of stuff on other things to manage on long haul flights, but not your period. Hell, it rarely makes it into the 'must pack' tip lists. It's invisible. For something so so so common, it's invisible because people don't want to be reminded of it. Packing bandaids? Fine. Packing tampons? Don't put that on your travel blog, it'll ruin the aesthetic.
(see also: periods on fieldwork)
Mind you, I'd love to see another version - ladies with bleeding knuckles from cooking, pricked fingertips in sewing, a bunch of really uber-feminine coded stuff that can/does make you bleed.
And I'd never call someone Lardo or Tubbs, unless they wanted me to.
posted by geek anachronism at 6:02 PM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
And I only wish I were still lifting, damnable wobbly joints - which, FYI, was something I tailored around my menstrual cycle because at certain times I am more limber and have a lower pain tolerance. That's not being condescending, that's acknowledging the riot of hormones. Right now I'm 85kgs of soft squishiness in a 165cm frame that is super grateful for hormonal birth control also giving me the option of stopping my period so I don't have yet another long haul flight while bleeding profusely. I did that exactly once and there is NO advice online about it. None. Bunches of stuff on other things to manage on long haul flights, but not your period. Hell, it rarely makes it into the 'must pack' tip lists. It's invisible. For something so so so common, it's invisible because people don't want to be reminded of it. Packing bandaids? Fine. Packing tampons? Don't put that on your travel blog, it'll ruin the aesthetic.
(see also: periods on fieldwork)
Mind you, I'd love to see another version - ladies with bleeding knuckles from cooking, pricked fingertips in sewing, a bunch of really uber-feminine coded stuff that can/does make you bleed.
And I'd never call someone Lardo or Tubbs, unless they wanted me to.
posted by geek anachronism at 6:02 PM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
In grade six, my partner fell and broke her arm. She kept it a secret until someone noticed that it was useless. On the other hand, she needs drugs to exist with cramps.
Perspective, man.
posted by klanawa at 6:02 PM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
Perspective, man.
posted by klanawa at 6:02 PM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
And I'd never call someone Lardo or Tubbs, unless they wanted me to.
Sorry, I meant it just as a lighthearted joke of impressed admiration mixed with self-deprecation -- I hope that was clear!
posted by biogeo at 7:03 PM on June 6, 2016
Sorry, I meant it just as a lighthearted joke of impressed admiration mixed with self-deprecation -- I hope that was clear!
posted by biogeo at 7:03 PM on June 6, 2016
An acquaintance on Dreamwidth wrote about the tampon ads she wanted to see a few years ago. She lists several; here's one:
A woman dressed in torn clothing creeps down a back alley, looking fearfully both behind and ahead of herself. She's exhausted and covered in dirt, and she clutches a baseball bat that's cocked up over one shoulder, ready to swing. She looks terrified and worn down but NOT HELPLESS OR SEXUALIZED.
Suddenly, ZOMBIES come spilling around the corner in front of her! It's the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE. The woman looks terrified but cranks the bat up high to swing on the first one. Then a BIG GODDAMN TRUCK rams into the zombies from behind, knocking them all out of the frame. The sound of gunfire come from the street behind. The First Woman looks up at her rescuers: the truck is full of equally badass women with machine guns/crowbars/machetes/brass knuckles, who are all completely ready to kill zombies and are NOT HELPLESS OR SEXUALIZED. The one standing in the back of the flatbed grins and reaches out a hand to pull the First Woman up into the truck.
A Third Woman in the back of the truck hands the First Woman a duffle bag and a stack of clothing.
Second Woman: You're gonna need these supplies.
Cut to: a shot of the First Woman armed and ready to kill zombies, dressed in PRISTINE WHITE PANTS. She does some clicky-sounding mechanical shenanigans with her sidearm (you know, like soldiers do in ~menz movies~) and jumps down from the back of the truck to fight zombies somewhere offscreen. Camera pans down to the duffle bags/crates left stacked in the back of the pickup, on top of which is a box of Tampons®.
Tampons®: "They can handle anything you can."
posted by ErisLordFreedom at 8:39 PM on June 6, 2016 [7 favorites]
A woman dressed in torn clothing creeps down a back alley, looking fearfully both behind and ahead of herself. She's exhausted and covered in dirt, and she clutches a baseball bat that's cocked up over one shoulder, ready to swing. She looks terrified and worn down but NOT HELPLESS OR SEXUALIZED.
Suddenly, ZOMBIES come spilling around the corner in front of her! It's the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE. The woman looks terrified but cranks the bat up high to swing on the first one. Then a BIG GODDAMN TRUCK rams into the zombies from behind, knocking them all out of the frame. The sound of gunfire come from the street behind. The First Woman looks up at her rescuers: the truck is full of equally badass women with machine guns/crowbars/machetes/brass knuckles, who are all completely ready to kill zombies and are NOT HELPLESS OR SEXUALIZED. The one standing in the back of the flatbed grins and reaches out a hand to pull the First Woman up into the truck.
A Third Woman in the back of the truck hands the First Woman a duffle bag and a stack of clothing.
Second Woman: You're gonna need these supplies.
Cut to: a shot of the First Woman armed and ready to kill zombies, dressed in PRISTINE WHITE PANTS. She does some clicky-sounding mechanical shenanigans with her sidearm (you know, like soldiers do in ~menz movies~) and jumps down from the back of the truck to fight zombies somewhere offscreen. Camera pans down to the duffle bags/crates left stacked in the back of the pickup, on top of which is a box of Tampons®.
Tampons®: "They can handle anything you can."
posted by ErisLordFreedom at 8:39 PM on June 6, 2016 [7 favorites]
LIVE FEARLESS
..ly.
What do advertising execs have against adverbs?
posted by desuetude at 9:58 PM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
..ly.
What do advertising execs have against adverbs?
posted by desuetude at 9:58 PM on June 6, 2016 [3 favorites]
desuetude: they just think different, OK?
posted by Tad Naff at 1:20 AM on June 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Tad Naff at 1:20 AM on June 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
An acquaintance on Dreamwidth wrote about the tampon ads she wanted to see a few years ago.
Nice one! I have thought of a menstrual cup commercial that I'd like to see:
We're watching Uma Thurman and Lucy Liu doing the sword fighting scene from Kill Bill. During the fight, Uma suddenly gets a worried/distracted expression on her face, holds up her hand, and says: 'Would you excuse me for a moment? I need to take care of... you know. I'm on my period.' Lucy lowers her sword, smiles, nods, and graciously shows her which way to the toilet.
Record scratch sound effect. Scene cuts to Uma in casual clothes, who says: "Can you imagine that? Neither can I. That's why I love my [cup brand]." [holds up cup for us to see] "Having your period should not interfere with what you're doing. [cup brand] is on your team. [or other such slogan]"
Scene cuts back to the fight, just before Uma interrupted it, which does not happen this time. Instead the fight continues as normal.
posted by Too-Ticky at 2:42 AM on June 7, 2016 [3 favorites]
Nice one! I have thought of a menstrual cup commercial that I'd like to see:
We're watching Uma Thurman and Lucy Liu doing the sword fighting scene from Kill Bill. During the fight, Uma suddenly gets a worried/distracted expression on her face, holds up her hand, and says: 'Would you excuse me for a moment? I need to take care of... you know. I'm on my period.' Lucy lowers her sword, smiles, nods, and graciously shows her which way to the toilet.
Record scratch sound effect. Scene cuts to Uma in casual clothes, who says: "Can you imagine that? Neither can I. That's why I love my [cup brand]." [holds up cup for us to see] "Having your period should not interfere with what you're doing. [cup brand] is on your team. [or other such slogan]"
Scene cuts back to the fight, just before Uma interrupted it, which does not happen this time. Instead the fight continues as normal.
posted by Too-Ticky at 2:42 AM on June 7, 2016 [3 favorites]
Partly because it looks like the creative team on this was entirely male (!!)
the male team behind this spot
the brand manager for Tampax who was (of course) a man
But do only the creatives count in campaigns like these? There’s a lot of female names involved in the complete credits, including brand manager, marketing director, marketing controller, and at least other 7 names, now I’m no insider or expert on all those different roles but I doubt they have no relevance in shaping an advertising campaign?
I don’t know, either way, to me it doesn’t look like an ad made by obtuse men being patronizing towards women. And considering that previous video where the fake CEO does mention "the flagrant use of visualisations such as sky-diving, roller-blading and mountain-biking – you forgot horse riding, Richard!", seems they went overboard with all that on purpose - they even put in those Game of Thrones-like shots with an armed medieval-looking warrior... riding a horse!
Before that appeared, as I was watching I was actually starting to groan a bit at all that super serious badass athleticism - oh here we go again, as if sky-diving wasn’t enough, now I’m supposed to get into boxing and football too to be happy with periods? - and then here comes a cross between Yara Greyjoy and a wildling warrior (with the sound of glass smashing! did she just kill a white walker?) and I had to laugh, well played. It works, it’s fun, and all the blood looks great. Without the horse-riding warrior I would still be groaning a bit, but I’m really ok with "flagrant use of visualisations as metaphors" taken to fun extremes in that way. It’s light years better than those tedious ads with the smiling women in lab coats explaining how the new thingey with the new layers holds the mysterious blue liquid soooo well and for sooo long, and I doubt more women were actively involved in making those. (Hope not, at least!)
posted by bitteschoen at 5:09 AM on June 7, 2016
the male team behind this spot
the brand manager for Tampax who was (of course) a man
But do only the creatives count in campaigns like these? There’s a lot of female names involved in the complete credits, including brand manager, marketing director, marketing controller, and at least other 7 names, now I’m no insider or expert on all those different roles but I doubt they have no relevance in shaping an advertising campaign?
I don’t know, either way, to me it doesn’t look like an ad made by obtuse men being patronizing towards women. And considering that previous video where the fake CEO does mention "the flagrant use of visualisations such as sky-diving, roller-blading and mountain-biking – you forgot horse riding, Richard!", seems they went overboard with all that on purpose - they even put in those Game of Thrones-like shots with an armed medieval-looking warrior... riding a horse!
Before that appeared, as I was watching I was actually starting to groan a bit at all that super serious badass athleticism - oh here we go again, as if sky-diving wasn’t enough, now I’m supposed to get into boxing and football too to be happy with periods? - and then here comes a cross between Yara Greyjoy and a wildling warrior (with the sound of glass smashing! did she just kill a white walker?) and I had to laugh, well played. It works, it’s fun, and all the blood looks great. Without the horse-riding warrior I would still be groaning a bit, but I’m really ok with "flagrant use of visualisations as metaphors" taken to fun extremes in that way. It’s light years better than those tedious ads with the smiling women in lab coats explaining how the new thingey with the new layers holds the mysterious blue liquid soooo well and for sooo long, and I doubt more women were actively involved in making those. (Hope not, at least!)
posted by bitteschoen at 5:09 AM on June 7, 2016
3. Next imagine your pecs are swollen and sore and you have to strap them into a bra every day or they hurt even worse.
4. Add some gut cramps, backaches, swollen feet, headaches, and mood swings and congratulations. That's (partly) how it feels.
How about "That’s (partly) how it can feel, or a little, or not at all" - not everyone has the same body and the same periods and symptoms, there really is a huge variety out there!
Sure, not everyone will be up for some fun sky-diving or mountain biking in a snowy forest or running marathons or slaying zombies, but there’s all sorts of real humans with an uterus who continue their lives during periods without major suffering. No need to pathologise all menstruation as such, that’s no better than advertising going to ridiculous extremes to gloss over it.
posted by bitteschoen at 5:39 AM on June 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
4. Add some gut cramps, backaches, swollen feet, headaches, and mood swings and congratulations. That's (partly) how it feels.
How about "That’s (partly) how it can feel, or a little, or not at all" - not everyone has the same body and the same periods and symptoms, there really is a huge variety out there!
Sure, not everyone will be up for some fun sky-diving or mountain biking in a snowy forest or running marathons or slaying zombies, but there’s all sorts of real humans with an uterus who continue their lives during periods without major suffering. No need to pathologise all menstruation as such, that’s no better than advertising going to ridiculous extremes to gloss over it.
posted by bitteschoen at 5:39 AM on June 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
bitteschoen: " 4. Add some gut cramps, backaches, swollen feet, headaches, and mood swings and congratulations. "
That's (partly) how it feels. How about "That’s (partly) how it can feel, or a little, or not at all" - not everyone has the same body and the same periods and symptoms, there really is a huge variety out there!
You're right, there is. For example, sometimes I get the mood swings mentioned above, but I never get the congratulations.
posted by Too-Ticky at 7:17 AM on June 7, 2016 [7 favorites]
That's (partly) how it feels. How about "That’s (partly) how it can feel, or a little, or not at all" - not everyone has the same body and the same periods and symptoms, there really is a huge variety out there!
You're right, there is. For example, sometimes I get the mood swings mentioned above, but I never get the congratulations.
posted by Too-Ticky at 7:17 AM on June 7, 2016 [7 favorites]
How about "That’s (partly) how it can feel, or a little, or not at all" - not everyone has the same body and the same periods and symptoms, there really is a huge variety out there!
Well, I would think even if you had no other symptoms, you would have the uterus and the bleeding, if you were having a period.
Less snarkily, I was not trying to encompass the entire experience of menstruation for every uterus-haver, just slapping together a list in terms a non-uterus-haver might be able to understand, in response to a guy upthread who mentioned not really understanding how it felt.
posted by emjaybee at 11:23 AM on June 7, 2016
Well, I would think even if you had no other symptoms, you would have the uterus and the bleeding, if you were having a period.
Less snarkily, I was not trying to encompass the entire experience of menstruation for every uterus-haver, just slapping together a list in terms a non-uterus-haver might be able to understand, in response to a guy upthread who mentioned not really understanding how it felt.
posted by emjaybee at 11:23 AM on June 7, 2016
Yes but those lists tend to be really negative when people come up with them.
I know a lot of people post in these threads like omg my uterus is mine enemy I would rip it out with my bare hands if I could and I get that, I really do. There's a history of difficult womb-related stuff in my family. But that's one area where I won the gene lottery - my sister got the high cheekbones and I got the cankles; she got the fibroids and by and large I got 5 days a month of light bleeding which arrives like clockwork, with 1-2 days of mild cramping and a benevolent feeling of being in touch with my body. I am very lucky to be privileged up the wazzoo when it comes to periods so I generally don't say it in these threads because it's like I'm betraying the sisterhood or something, but at the same time my experience is rarely represented. Blood doesn't hold me back. The only thing stopping me from participating in any kind of activity is pure bone idleness.
posted by billiebee at 12:03 PM on June 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
I know a lot of people post in these threads like omg my uterus is mine enemy I would rip it out with my bare hands if I could and I get that, I really do. There's a history of difficult womb-related stuff in my family. But that's one area where I won the gene lottery - my sister got the high cheekbones and I got the cankles; she got the fibroids and by and large I got 5 days a month of light bleeding which arrives like clockwork, with 1-2 days of mild cramping and a benevolent feeling of being in touch with my body. I am very lucky to be privileged up the wazzoo when it comes to periods so I generally don't say it in these threads because it's like I'm betraying the sisterhood or something, but at the same time my experience is rarely represented. Blood doesn't hold me back. The only thing stopping me from participating in any kind of activity is pure bone idleness.
posted by billiebee at 12:03 PM on June 7, 2016 [2 favorites]
billiebee: she got the fibroids and by and large I got 5 days a month of light bleeding which arrives like clockwork, with 1-2 days of mild cramping and a benevolent feeling of being in touch with my body.
I used to have cramps that really hurt. Then I got a cup and that was pretty much the end of that.
Then my flow got gradually heavier over the years, until it meant that I could not leave the house for longer than half an our at a time on my two heavy days. Then I got a fibroid removed and that was the end of that.
Now my periods are a lot like yours, and I feel doubly lucky because I remember how it used to be (and I know that it can certainly be a lot worse than I ever had it).
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:46 PM on June 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
I used to have cramps that really hurt. Then I got a cup and that was pretty much the end of that.
Then my flow got gradually heavier over the years, until it meant that I could not leave the house for longer than half an our at a time on my two heavy days. Then I got a fibroid removed and that was the end of that.
Now my periods are a lot like yours, and I feel doubly lucky because I remember how it used to be (and I know that it can certainly be a lot worse than I ever had it).
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:46 PM on June 7, 2016 [1 favorite]
It must be cultural. But I fncking hate the phrase "on my period". What in the hell does that even mean? Usually the damn thing is all over me, on day two anyway. Cup be damned.
posted by taff at 7:02 AM on June 8, 2016
posted by taff at 7:02 AM on June 8, 2016
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