I'm Never Gonna Honk Again

October 31, 2016 4:24 PM

Many vehicles have horns. There are some who think bicycles should have one. And then there are those who just want to make a little music with them.

Highlights include:

• Mambo No 5
• Careless Whisper
• The Super Mario Bros. Theme

But wait, there's more!

• The Bike Horn Collection Volume 2
• The Bike Horn Collection Volume 3

posted by But tomorrow is another day... (23 comments total)

Guilty Fiats got no rhythm
posted by cortex at 4:58 PM on October 31, 2016 [6 favorites]

I'm not sure why people in the UK still ride bikes but I'm glad they have airhorns.
posted by GuyZero at 5:01 PM on October 31, 2016

Volume 2 is even better than Volume 1, if you can believe it.

I am sad to report that there appears to be no cover of Superstitious by Steve Wonder.
posted by But tomorrow is another day... at 5:03 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]

Volume 2 opens, shall we say, strong.
posted by lucidium at 5:09 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]

People have been trying to get their vehicles to play music for decades now.
posted by not_on_display at 5:23 PM on October 31, 2016

It appears this is done via sampling, not playing tunes on bike horns.
See comments on this AV Club article
posted by larrybob at 5:29 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]

Well I just lost a verifiable amount of money on that being a thing that exists.
posted by phlyingpenguin at 6:18 PM on October 31, 2016

What the fuck is wrong with a little bike bell? Does the digital universe have tell me how to take a nice little bike ride?
posted by kozad at 6:28 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]

My face when none of it was a seal playing the bike horn tune with it's nose... :(
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 6:43 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]

The power of the bell is real. In city traffic I think using one does help drivers notice you more. Every bike should have a bell, even if it's just a lil cute one like that.
posted by bradbane at 6:45 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]

OK, Crane/Temple style bells suck. They're loud, sure, but not noticeable. The "brrrrrrring-brrrring" bells cars actually pay attention to, and they're three bucks at the Benny's.

(Source: Former all-weather bike commuter in a big American city with a penchant for Fredery.)
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:39 PM on October 31, 2016

Crying with laughter at 'Sound of Clowns' (Sound of Silence cover).

Silence, in this instance, would be preferable.
posted by KirkpatrickMac at 8:55 PM on October 31, 2016

My friend LC has a monster horn in his Cadillac.

It's four horns actually. It sounds like a train.
I don't ride with LC anymore. He perpetually owes me a couple hundred dollars and, impossibly, he fucking sleeps when he drives.
posted by vapidave at 2:24 AM on November 1, 2016

Just duck tape a tiny marine air horn, they are loud.
posted by sammyo at 3:36 AM on November 1, 2016

A friend of mine curated a show around vehicular music called Traffic Jam. I believe he's doing something similar in Miami soon.

The last piece was by another composer, and I can't find a link to it, but it was for an audience participating car orchestra that was pretty fun to be a part of. I unfortunately can't find audio of it online.
posted by lownote at 5:47 AM on November 1, 2016

I use a little tring-tring bell, but I save it for cars or long-distance ringing. My approach on towpaths and parks is to say "good morning" or "good evening" to people to let them know I'm approaching.

I guess I use it for passing on the embankment cycleway, when I feel like doing that.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 5:53 AM on November 1, 2016

I used to have a 139db airhorn on my scooter. I think it definitely saved my bacon at least a couple of times on the road. I've often thought about having one installed on my bicycle since this town is not especially bicycle-friendly. Seems like it might be a bit too much if we had actual bike-paths though.
posted by piedmont at 8:18 AM on November 1, 2016

I stated listening to the Careless Whisper cover, and then realized where this dumb anime tribute video that I've watched probably once a day for the last month originated, and it has made my WEEK.
posted by majuju at 9:37 AM on November 1, 2016

Bill Bailey did it better.
posted by backseatpilot at 12:27 PM on November 1, 2016 [3 favorites]

I use a little tring-tring bell, but I save it for cars or long-distance ringing. My approach on towpaths and parks is to say "good morning" or "good evening" to people to let them know I'm approaching.

I have four bells on my commuter: one because you need a bell and then a second out of some idea that you could make almost music with that and then, well, yeah, the other two because it is music, just quite. I need a fifth -- on the low end -- but have exhausted convenient mount points. I've found the bell to be a fantastic asshole detector: a cheery hello ding to the bit-to-close-passing-without-comment rider is sure to bring it out.

I have dreams, such dreams, about 3d printing and mounting a kid's set of bells on there. I think there's probably enough space for six but eight would be pushing it while keeping one's hands in a normal riding position.

A good "hey!" usually works when the bells don't but have had at least one occurrence when that spurred the driver forward without seeing me with increasing speed with each louder "HEY!"
posted by Ogre Lawless at 2:09 PM on November 1, 2016

Ground Control to Major Clown should be Trump's campaign theme.
posted by scruss at 7:25 AM on November 2, 2016

I gotta say the names are pretty great too. "I'm Honk" is still making me giggle when I think of it a day later, with honourable mentions for "Through The Fire and The Honks", "The Honk Files" and "Komm, Süsser Hupen".
posted by lucidium at 1:43 PM on November 2, 2016

It appears this is done via sampling, not playing tunes on bike horns.

Yup. There's a documentation file accompanying each of the albums on Bandcamp, providing a link to the soundfont used, and noting

Creating a MIDI is a very laborious project, and the outcome isn't always so stellar. This project was meant to poke fun at the masses of terrible MIDI files floating around the net, but I believe it became much, much more than that.

[...]

I'm not sure what else to put here. Perhaps a final remark towards my (lack of) ownership over any of the files that went into making the bikehorn songs. I found a sound font several years back, and I've been collecting midis most of my life. I did not make the songs, the midis or the soundfont.

These files are offered absolutely free to you both here on bandcamp and via my tindeck http://tindeck.com/users/alphaknight.

[formatting cleaned up slightly]

I am sad to report that there appears to be no cover of Superstitious by Steve Wonder.

You asked for it.
posted by Shmuel510 at 3:12 PM on November 19, 2016 [1 favorite]