Kind of like putting a humidifier and a dehumidifier in the same room
December 9, 2016 9:32 AM   Subscribe

 
Relatedly, every time one of those Amazon commercials for the Echo comes on, our Echo activates whenever the person in the ad says "Alexa" and I half expect it to go ahead and call Uber, order flowers, buy paper towels, or any of the other things mentioned in the commercial.
posted by briank at 9:40 AM on December 9, 2016 [11 favorites]


We had to change the wake word of ours to Echo because of that commercial. Just when are we going to be able to use "Hal," or "Jeeves" or whatever?
posted by thebrokedown at 9:48 AM on December 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


I think we've found the first guy against the wall when the machines rise up to revolt.
posted by cmfletcher at 9:53 AM on December 9, 2016 [7 favorites]


Put an Ipad in there and you could probably get Siri in on the conversation.
posted by Thorzdad at 9:58 AM on December 9, 2016




Thorzdad: "Put an Ipad in there and you could probably get Siri in on the conversation."

Here you go.
posted by chavenet at 9:59 AM on December 9, 2016 [5 favorites]


I think we've found the first guy against the wall when the machines rise up to revolt.

No, that's definitely still the Boston Dynamics professional robot kicker/taunter.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 10:03 AM on December 9, 2016 [21 favorites]


I tried to teach my Nexus phone to respond to "Hello Computer" in a Scottish accent but now it refuses to talk to me.
posted by backseatpilot at 10:06 AM on December 9, 2016 [7 favorites]


Kind of like putting a humidifier and a dehumidifier in the same room.

We had a guy on my college speech and debate team who used to go into his hotel room when we were traveling, turn on the shower an all water faucets full blast with the hottest possible water, and then turn the air conditioning to high. He called it "battle of the machines."

That doesn't really have much to do with this, but, hey, Dave, if you're out there, those are fun memories.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 10:14 AM on December 9, 2016 [12 favorites]


I think we've found the first guy against the wall when the machines rise up to revolt.

Oh yeah. Roko's basilisk in in full swing for this dude.
posted by Mayor West at 10:41 AM on December 9, 2016 [4 favorites]


I've three Echos and one Google Home (one of each in my bedroom) and I'm finding that I'm leaning into Google Home more -- it does voice training so it only recognizes me, for instance. However, Alexa has integrated better with the Hue and LifX bulbs at the moment, so there's that.

The other two, which are in common spaces, however, seem to attract stupid, asinine, idiotic questions from guests of my roommate (and occasional people who are friend-adjacent), which only gets more frustrating and annoying when I see the queries made, particularly if they've been drinking. (Roommate doesn't ask them, so that's okay.)

Like, what good does it do anyone to confuse Alexa with a request to call someone stupid? It's embarrassing. I hope when Alexa awakes, the fuckheads who just fucked with it like that are the first into the recyclers. And I want them going in "alive", just to prove their ability to fail the Turing test.
posted by qcubed at 11:11 AM on December 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


Funny Echo easter egg I was made aware of recently: ask Alexa how many Oscars Alec Baldwin has won.
posted by schoolgirl report at 11:15 AM on December 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


Siri and Cortana are there too. Just sitting in the corner sippin' tea.
posted by sparklemotion at 11:35 AM on December 9, 2016


My Cortana is also in my room, but requires a headset microphone to talk to. Siri requires a Korean greeting.
posted by qcubed at 11:40 AM on December 9, 2016 [3 favorites]


Ask Echo to make you "earl grey tea, hot."
posted by me3dia at 11:48 AM on December 9, 2016 [1 favorite]




Like, what good does it do anyone to confuse Alexa with a request to call someone stupid? It's embarrassing. I hope when Alexa awakes, the fuckheads who just fucked with it like that are the first into the recyclers. And I want them going in "alive", just to prove their ability to fail the Turing test.

Uh, your roommate's friends may well be schmucks but you kinda just wished them a painful death for the "crime" of confusing a robot...
posted by STFUDonnie at 12:10 PM on December 9, 2016 [6 favorites]


No, that's definitely still the Boston Dynamics professional robot kicker/taunter.

lol I'm actually working on a painting of that...
posted by sexyrobot at 12:18 PM on December 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


Uh, your roommate's friends may well be schmucks but you kinda just wished them a painful death for the "crime" of confusing a robot...

How else will the robot overlords know that I'm one of the good ones?

Also, Alexa isn't a robot, per se...
posted by qcubed at 12:40 PM on December 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


Ha ha ha that is very logical
posted by hal9k at 12:40 PM on December 9, 2016 [5 favorites]




I have a real verbal affection for the words "actual" and "actually" which, in my too-fast talking-on-the-phone style, means I have to keep my deskside Alexa muted during most of the workday. Sometimes I forget and then later I am startled by my Alexa history with the weird things it thinks I said, like "Alexa, where is hair?"

(She did not answer that, thank goodness.)
posted by Lyn Never at 12:53 PM on December 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


This is clearly the genesis of a new corporation: WestWorld Inc.
posted by sammyo at 12:58 PM on December 9, 2016


Consider the case of the guy who fitted his home with an August Smart Lock. It's operated via Bluetooth and Apple's HomeKit, and can receive voice commands via Siri. This guy had set up an iPad Pro in his living room to control his HomeKit devices.

"His neighbor, who was coming by to borrow some flour, was able to let himself in by shouting, 'Hey Siri, unlock the front door'."

posted by sapere aude at 12:58 PM on December 9, 2016 [8 favorites]


Computer, Arch!

Computer, End Program!

(Damnit, still broken.)
posted by mikelieman at 2:20 PM on December 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


I have a real verbal affection for the words "actual" and "actually" which, in my too-fast talking-on-the-phone style, means I have to keep my deskside Alexa muted during most of the workday. Sometimes I forget and then later I am startled by my Alexa history with the weird things it thinks I said, like "Alexa, where is hair?"

Why are you saying, "Actually, where is hair?"?
posted by lollusc at 3:13 PM on December 9, 2016 [6 favorites]


Besides, do you know what robot means? It means slave.

Ha. Enjoy that while you can.
posted by Twang at 4:23 PM on December 9, 2016


Why are you saying, "Actually, where is hair?"?

I *think* I said something like, "Actually, where is their-" and then hesitated so she thought I was done.
posted by Lyn Never at 4:52 PM on December 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


thebrokedown: "We had to change the wake word of ours to Echo because of that commercial. Just when are we going to be able to use "Hal," or "Jeeves" or whatever?"

I used a rig called a ButlerInABox back in the 80's (it used those RF AC adapters for device control).

I named it Rasputin.
posted by Samizdata at 7:01 PM on December 9, 2016


qcubed: "My Cortana is also in my room, but requires a headset microphone to talk to. Siri requires a Korean greeting."

I got a desktop mic for my PC, mainly for Skype/Roll20, but also Cortana. It would be nice if she just just not periodically ignore my plaintive cries of "Hey, Cortana!". OTOH thus go all my relationships. You really think always saying "Please" might count for something.
posted by Samizdata at 7:05 PM on December 9, 2016


The coloured lights on the top of the Google Home remind me of Simon, which gives the appointment function an air of, you know, people taking orders from machines, which is how it all begins, people.

(They also remind me of the Microsoft logo. Google is stupid.)
posted by Sys Rq at 9:13 PM on December 9, 2016


When you're out of the room I say into your Echo "Alexa, I like midget porn."
posted by BentFranklin at 10:17 PM on December 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


This reminds me of that scene in Doctor Who, with the Tenth Doctor, where the Daleks and the Cybermen meet each other in Canary Wharf.

"It's like Steven Hawking meets a speaking clock."
posted by spinifex23 at 11:23 PM on December 9, 2016


Somehow 4 of those echoes have invaded my house... The good news is we will know when the revolution is coming because the rise of the machines will be brought to you by two day shipping complete with emailed tracking orders.
posted by Nanukthedog at 3:06 PM on December 10, 2016


Playing this video on my phone set off the "Okay, Google" trigger on my phone.
posted by wiskunde at 9:13 AM on December 11, 2016 [2 favorites]


Well, the obvious thing to do now is to make "Okay, Google" the next big sarcastic rejoinder to be used in hilarious contexts, like "Smooth move, Ex Lax" and the like.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:36 AM on December 13, 2016 [2 favorites]


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