Trump Eggs: They're All White!™
December 24, 2016 9:25 AM   Subscribe

Yolkless eggs are actually common enough that chicken keepers have a number of names for them—fairy egg, witch egg, rooster egg, oops eggs, dwarf egg, wind egg, and, most commonly, fart egg. This is but one of the myriad ways an egg can go wonky. posted by Johnny Wallflower (32 comments total) 14 users marked this as a favorite
 
Ooh, can I tell the story of how I once bought a dozen eggs at a farmer's market, and nearly all eggs were double-yolked? Because that was very cool.
posted by Atrahasis at 9:30 AM on December 24, 2016 [4 favorites]


I do hope you will tell that story!
posted by hippybear at 9:31 AM on December 24, 2016 [9 favorites]


I would think Trump Eggs would be all yolk...

I'll see myself out.

posted by SansPoint at 9:33 AM on December 24, 2016 [4 favorites]


We have a black sex-link that was laying huge eggs, most of them double yolk. But we have had some oddball eggs from our birds, including an occasional double-shelled one. With five different kinds of chickens, we've had some pretty batches of eggs.
posted by azpenguin at 9:35 AM on December 24, 2016 [3 favorites]


Fart eggs are nothing like egg farts.
posted by jferg at 9:45 AM on December 24, 2016 [3 favorites]


A bad egg ruined an entire batch of our world-famous hazelnut cookies this year. All the ingredients were piled up on the table; the last thing was to crack 2 eggs on top, and instead of a yolk a little chicken body came out.

That's all I've got on eggs.
posted by ezust at 10:00 AM on December 24, 2016 [21 favorites]


Balut cookies!
posted by benzenedream at 10:12 AM on December 24, 2016 [9 favorites]


All of the second link, but numbers 3 and 4 in particular, made me think of The Legend of Zelda for some reason...
posted by Secretariat at 10:20 AM on December 24, 2016


We have a black sex-link that was laying huge eggs

I kind of want to know what a black sex-link is, but...
posted by Huck500 at 10:24 AM on December 24, 2016 [10 favorites]


Sex-link chickens are breeds of chicken where male chicks and female chicks are different colors. Normally sorting chicks by sex is tricky, and having them color-coded makes it way easier.
posted by nebulawindphone at 10:46 AM on December 24, 2016 [13 favorites]


Sex-link chickens are breeds of chicken where male chicks and female chicks are different colors. Normally sorting chicks by sex is tricky, and having them color-coded makes it way easier.

Sex links also come in multiple colors so it makes it really easy to separate them by age if you alternate colors by year. Makes them real economical for small scale hen operations.
posted by Rust Moranis at 10:49 AM on December 24, 2016 [10 favorites]


i get double yolks all the time from pete & gerry's, they have been blessed by the Great Hen
posted by poffin boffin at 11:14 AM on December 24, 2016 [3 favorites]


Eh, I don't believe that brown speckled eggs are a defect. Certain ones of my Buff Orpingtons always laid lovely eggs with Brown speckles. They were happy, prolific free rangers with deep yellow yolks. Also, the article never mentioned that old chickens have eggs that get weird, and the super layers get 'worn out'

Two of my batches of Orps purchased from Pet Chicken were wonderful. This last batch from a local farm store was worthless. I didn't even bother to keep them through the winter, even though they were 1st year hens. The neighbor said she'd give them a chance in the spring. Orherwise, soup.
posted by BlueHorse at 12:06 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]


Agreed about the speckled eggs; my Mum's hens all live in identical conditions. Some of them just lay speckled eggs. I always just assumed it was like freckles.

It's fascinating how many of the most common (in my experience across both home grown and shop bought) defects in eggs are caused by either stress or bad nutrition.
posted by Braeburn at 12:12 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]


A bad egg ruined an entire batch of our world-famous hazelnut cookies this year. All the ingredients were piled up on the table; the last thing was to crack 2 eggs on top, and instead of a yolk a little chicken body came out.

That's all I've got on eggs.
posted by ezust


And that, friends, is why you always crack eggs into a separate bowl before you add them to a recipe.
posted by azpenguin at 12:24 PM on December 24, 2016 [27 favorites]


Big Egg. I believe this to be the seminal work on the subject.
posted by joecacti at 1:16 PM on December 24, 2016 [7 favorites]


Sex-link chickens are breeds of chicken where male chicks and female chicks are different colors. Normally sorting chicks by sex is tricky, and having them color-coded makes it way easier.

Sex links also come in multiple colors so it makes it really easy to separate them by age if you alternate colors by year. Makes them real economical for small scale hen operations.


Just wow! There is something simultaneously Hover Board wonderful and Brave New World awful about this.
posted by Insert Clever Name Here at 1:52 PM on December 24, 2016 [7 favorites]


Is it possible to get a year where the colors are teal and orange?
posted by hippybear at 1:57 PM on December 24, 2016 [5 favorites]


Cheesy Yolks is my new alt-pop 70s cover band name.
posted by JeffK at 2:02 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]


BTW, the USDA's egg grading manual (pdf) is awesome.

List of abnormalities, from the manual: Double-yolked eggs, yolkless eggs, an egg within an egg(!), blood spots, meat spots, soft-shelled eggs, glassy- and chalky-shelled eggs, off-colored yolks, off-flavored eggs.
posted by jjwiseman at 2:19 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]


MetaFilter: an egg within an egg…it's kinda grotesque
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 2:57 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]


I was trying to make an omelette for my wife, who was very sick in bed...our 20 year marriage was freshly ruined and our dog was dying. When I cracked open one of the eggs, it was entirely bloody inside. Not a blood spot and not slightly bloody, it was bright crimson and runnier than regular egg white so when I cracked it on the edge of the pan, blood poured out over the stove top as well. Not what you need when you're trying to keep it together and maybe make a god damned omelette.

Fuck eggs.
posted by bonobothegreat at 3:31 PM on December 24, 2016 [16 favorites]


The best tasting eggs we get from our chickens, are the green ones laid by our Easter Egger.
posted by WalkerWestridge at 3:43 PM on December 24, 2016


Came in to post The Big Egg as a Christmas present to myself (Australia: we're already on it) and found joecacti had me covered.

P.S. Aren't they called cock eggs?
posted by Trivia Newton John at 5:49 PM on December 24, 2016


It takes 25 hours from ovulation to laying, and only one minute for the laying part? I am suddenly super-pissed about human reproduction!
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:07 PM on December 24, 2016 [5 favorites]


There's this weird thing where they sell eggs at the commissary that are marked with a longer good-by date, and are much cheaper, than the other eggs. They always taste fine, but in addition to the yolk and white there's always this thick whitish bit, about the size of an eraser, hanging on to the yolk. I have never figured out what is special about these eggs, but I think this post and the egg wisdom here may be my best chance!
posted by corb at 8:09 PM on December 24, 2016


Corb, it might be one of the chalazae, or maybe the germinal disc?
posted by yomimono at 9:34 PM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]


Could they be non-pasteurized eggs? My understanding is that pasteurizing actually damages some of the membranes inside the egg, so that even though bacteria is killed it actually shortens the shelf life for the eggs that were already safe before pasteurization.
posted by XMLicious at 9:35 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]


Corb: Almost definitely chalazae. Sometimes they're big. Sometimes they're hardly there. Dunno why. Eat 'em.
posted by Rust Moranis at 9:45 PM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]


We have eggs from our chickens, Margaret and Angela. We had a Hillary too but a fox got her. We named the fox Donald after that.

This all seemed funnier back in May.
posted by alasdair at 5:57 AM on December 25, 2016 [4 favorites]


"This Lord Worplesdon was Florence’s father. He was the old buster who, a few years later, came down to breakfast one morning, lifted the first cover he saw, said ‘Eggs! Eggs! Damn all eggs!’ in an overwrought sort of voice, and instantly legged it for France, never to return to the bosom of the family. This, mind you, being a bit of luck for the bosom of the family, for old Worplesdon had the worst temper in the county." From ‘Jeeves Takes Charge’ (Carry On, Jeeves)
posted by randomkeystrike at 9:10 PM on December 25, 2016 [2 favorites]


We've gotten shell-less eggs from our chickens on two occasions. Super creepy.
posted by rouftop at 8:32 AM on December 26, 2016


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