Anyone who sides with Dan Snyder about anything is wrong. That is a fact

January 31, 2017 2:35 PM

Drew Magary would like you to spent some time thinking about the second most hated orange clown in America: Roger Goodell’s 25 Dumbest Moments.
posted by MartinWisse (18 comments total)

... and yet, he will remain in his seat until the owners see a downtick in profits.

Also: The NFL is the only league on Earth with a penalty for “excessive celebration”
wrong, FIFA has also penalized taking the shirt off during a celebration (in part because of those awful two-layer Nike shirts released 15 years ago or so that were a problem to put on). Players also can't go past the adboards to celebrate a goal. You can, however, do all these.
posted by lmfsilva at 2:55 PM on January 31, 2017 [1 favorite]

I have to say I loved the article even though I really do loathe Goodell. It's amazing how wrong he consistently is able to be. AND I'm able to actually find common ground on my hate of Goodell with my father, which is a rare thing. He's the type of guy that is pretty much all in favor of the NCAA's dumb policies, so if even he can agree, you know it's pretty bad.
posted by Carillon at 3:16 PM on January 31, 2017

That pizza thing really clinches it.
posted by AndrewInDC at 3:38 PM on January 31, 2017 [2 favorites]

I came here thinking of Dee Snider. I'm not sure what to say about this Daniel.
posted by groda at 3:39 PM on January 31, 2017

The events related in that article made it too painful to pay close attention the whole way through, but I really did like the sentence: "Yes, let’s bring to football all the excitement of filing for a commercial oyster-farming license."
posted by LeLiLo at 4:19 PM on January 31, 2017 [1 favorite]

That guy sounds like a treat. He should run for President.
posted by lagomorphius at 4:43 PM on January 31, 2017

Did you complete the process of the catch? Did you make a football move AFTER securing the ball? Did you have possession BEFORE your second foot went out of bounds? Were you a legally documented citizen when you made the catch? What did focus groups say about your catch? In Goodell’s hands, any breathtaking play made by Dez Bryant now gets permanently wiped from existence after 10 excruciating minutes of super-slo-mo replay followed by an appeal to the 19th district circuit court. Yes, let’s bring to football all the excitement of filing for a commercial oyster-farming license. Christ.

truth.
posted by srboisvert at 5:20 PM on January 31, 2017

And yet he still can't make me root for the New England Patriots.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 5:25 PM on January 31, 2017 [2 favorites]

I hate him but I will defend to my death his right to punish the New England Chea-triots.
posted by Megafly at 6:02 PM on January 31, 2017 [2 favorites]

I STAND WITH DEE SNIDER AND WE'RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Goodell is a disaster and needs to go.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:07 PM on January 31, 2017 [1 favorite]

I’m gonna go stare longingly at a poster of Adam Silver for a while.

Silver allowed ads on uniforms, so fuck that guy.
posted by Chrysostom at 10:00 PM on January 31, 2017

As an aside, what is it about white dudes insecure about their rank that make them dye themselves orange? Goodell and Trump, sure, but also John Bohner and innumerable middle-aged corporate executives too.

For that matter, what *is* that shit their stylists are rubbing all over their heads? Who thought this was a good idea as a power display? Has Tony Robbins been notified?
posted by ardgedee at 5:42 AM on February 1, 2017

It's the same thing that makes them get ridiculous haircuts or wear suits that manifestly don't fit -- with enough money and/or power you reach a point where people just won't tell you that you look absurd, either out of fear or because they know you won't listen so why bother.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 9:37 AM on February 1, 2017

See also: Raiders owner Mark Davis.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 9:41 AM on February 1, 2017 [1 favorite]

God damn it, Skyline is delicious.

The rest is spot on, he's a horrible commissioner.
posted by Mick at 1:10 PM on February 1, 2017

God damn it, Skyline is delicious.

I honestly do not understand why so many people lose their mind at the thought of Cincinnati chili. Yes, it is not what you'd get in San Antonio. It's its own thing, and perfectly good at what it's doing, but for whatever reason it's subject to all sorts of abuse just for existing.
posted by Copronymus at 1:18 PM on February 1, 2017

It's its own thing, and perfectly good at what it's doing, but for whatever reason it's subject to all sorts of abuse just for existing.

Cincinnati transplant here who likes the stuff. I think it is the word association thing with "chili". Some people just can't accept that something that tastes different than one of a half dozen other chili traditions has the same name. I think if it was sold as Kertefblan*, an Italian-Greek-Macedonia hybrid meat sauce over noodles with cheddar cheese, no one would blink an eye.

*Just to pick a random name out of a hat.
posted by mmascolino at 1:43 PM on February 1, 2017

People react with horror because it's in a very real sense not the chili they're expecting -- it's something entirely unrelated, based on Mediterranean cuisine, that Greek immigrants decided to label "chili" because of reasons. It's an even more extreme version of the Chicago style/New York style pizza divide, except different styles of pizza don't look nearly as similar as the different chilis. You can order Cincinnati chili and not realize it's going to taste any different from the other kind until you actually take a bite, at which point the surprise factor will color your opinion of the dish.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 1:47 PM on February 1, 2017