Zekevivor
April 13, 2017 8:55 AM Subscribe
Zeke Smith, on being outed as a transgender man on Survivor: The lights magnified in brightness. The cameras, though 30 feet away, suddenly felt inches from my face. All sound faded. Something primal deep inside me screamed: run. I lost control of my body, my legs bounced up and down uncontrollably, willing me to flee, but the rest of me sat dead as stone. To my left was The Abyss. I could’ve made a clean break for it, but I knew there was no running from what had happened. Cameras would follow me, if not that night, then eventually. Running was not an option. So I sat blank, almost in a trance, unaware of what happened around me, trying to form a plan.
NYTimes coverage, by Jennifer Finney Boyle: Outed as Transgender on ‘Survivor’ — and in Real Life: On “Survivor,” Mr. Varner’s gambit backfired, and in the end, he was the one whose torch was snuffed out. For this night, at any rate, the other survivors decided that outing someone else’s personal history was a far more unforgivable act than anything Mr. Smith had or had not done. But would people in reality behave with the same grace as people on the reality show? Would you?
Jeff Probst interview: We knew Zeke was a tremendous storyteller with an amazing ability to take a specific moment from the game or life and give it a universal perspective. That’s why we asked him back to play a second time. And yet I was still blown away by how he handled the entire situation. It was as if he had been preparing for this absolutely unpredictable, completely public, and incredibly vulnerable moment for his entire life. His composure was astounding. And when he connected the entire event to the word metamorphosis, I distinctly remember thinking — how in the world did you just do that?
NYTimes coverage, by Jennifer Finney Boyle: Outed as Transgender on ‘Survivor’ — and in Real Life: On “Survivor,” Mr. Varner’s gambit backfired, and in the end, he was the one whose torch was snuffed out. For this night, at any rate, the other survivors decided that outing someone else’s personal history was a far more unforgivable act than anything Mr. Smith had or had not done. But would people in reality behave with the same grace as people on the reality show? Would you?
Jeff Probst interview: We knew Zeke was a tremendous storyteller with an amazing ability to take a specific moment from the game or life and give it a universal perspective. That’s why we asked him back to play a second time. And yet I was still blown away by how he handled the entire situation. It was as if he had been preparing for this absolutely unpredictable, completely public, and incredibly vulnerable moment for his entire life. His composure was astounding. And when he connected the entire event to the word metamorphosis, I distinctly remember thinking — how in the world did you just do that?
It sure as hell wasn't right in the first place, but the dude who outed ZS has come around to a solid acceptance that outing somebody is a form of assault.
posted by entropone at 9:25 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by entropone at 9:25 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
The tribal council is on YouTube if anyone wants to watch. The man who outed him was Jeff Varner, who some of you may remember from the second season, Survivor: The Australian Outback, back when they were all minor celebrities. Varner himself is gay and chose not to reveal that fact during his original season in 2001. And here is Varner's statement.
posted by acidic at 9:26 AM on April 13, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by acidic at 9:26 AM on April 13, 2017 [6 favorites]
I am a trans man. I lived through this, back when 4chan's /cgl/ was determined to out me as when I still preferred being stealth. I see via Google searches there's been loads of speculation about Zeke, including people pouring over his photos analyzing his chest scars, skeletal structure, etc.
It's exactly what I went though when /cgl/ (annoyed, I suppose at my brief popularity) decided to pour over all my cosplay photos. It really sucks to have photos of yourself posted with red arrows pointing to everything you're dysphoric about. I had stalkers for years, using every excuse in the book, from "you're being deceptive" to "but if you're out, you'll inspire other trans people".
I've also gone through this when my partner's sister outed me to their parents. The sister and parents, who had spent months thinking I was a cis man, immediately began misgendering me in person. They told my partner (who I had disclosed to before the first date) I was being deceptive if I didn't immediately tell EVERYONE I met I was trans. I was not allowed to meet the grandparents because there was suddenly all this concern about if I pass (I have a beard, lol). All this concern-trolling hiding what was transphobia, plain and simple.
It's disgusting how much entitlement cis people have over trans bodies. Disclosure is a very personal choice, and it's almost always influenced by safety. I am no longer stealth, but I have absolutely given up a measure of safety in order to be visible to other trans folks. And to be honest, I overwhelmingly prefer to hang out with trans people.
And that's really the other important takeaway -- being openly trans, aside from being a personal decision, is most likely for the benefit of trans people, and seldom for the benefit of cis folk. (Same with transition photos. They are rarely ever for cis people.) A committed cis partner and certain cis medical providers are perhaps the only exceptions, and even then, there is some debate.
Never ever EVER out a trans person. You are putting them in danger by doing so. Even if they are publically out, that is a conversation for THEM to initiate and control. It's a mater of consent, and they may choose to withdraw it at any time.
posted by Wossname at 9:29 AM on April 13, 2017 [114 favorites]
It's exactly what I went though when /cgl/ (annoyed, I suppose at my brief popularity) decided to pour over all my cosplay photos. It really sucks to have photos of yourself posted with red arrows pointing to everything you're dysphoric about. I had stalkers for years, using every excuse in the book, from "you're being deceptive" to "but if you're out, you'll inspire other trans people".
I've also gone through this when my partner's sister outed me to their parents. The sister and parents, who had spent months thinking I was a cis man, immediately began misgendering me in person. They told my partner (who I had disclosed to before the first date) I was being deceptive if I didn't immediately tell EVERYONE I met I was trans. I was not allowed to meet the grandparents because there was suddenly all this concern about if I pass (I have a beard, lol). All this concern-trolling hiding what was transphobia, plain and simple.
It's disgusting how much entitlement cis people have over trans bodies. Disclosure is a very personal choice, and it's almost always influenced by safety. I am no longer stealth, but I have absolutely given up a measure of safety in order to be visible to other trans folks. And to be honest, I overwhelmingly prefer to hang out with trans people.
And that's really the other important takeaway -- being openly trans, aside from being a personal decision, is most likely for the benefit of trans people, and seldom for the benefit of cis folk. (Same with transition photos. They are rarely ever for cis people.) A committed cis partner and certain cis medical providers are perhaps the only exceptions, and even then, there is some debate.
Never ever EVER out a trans person. You are putting them in danger by doing so. Even if they are publically out, that is a conversation for THEM to initiate and control. It's a mater of consent, and they may choose to withdraw it at any time.
posted by Wossname at 9:29 AM on April 13, 2017 [114 favorites]
This guy is a fantastic writer. That first link is great reading from start to finish - relatable, funny, and perfectly detailed, and it really shows his passion for the show, his personal struggles and the struggles of trans people in general, and his dedication, awkwardness, and compassion. And the end made me cry. I don't even watch Survivor but if he writes a book about his time on the show I'd totally buy it.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:33 AM on April 13, 2017 [7 favorites]
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:33 AM on April 13, 2017 [7 favorites]
And yet I was still blown away by how he handled the entire situation. It was as if he had been preparing for this absolutely unpredictable, completely public, and incredibly vulnerable moment for his entire life.
Probst's words are kind, and I appreciate them, but it needs noting that yes, non-cis folk are forced against our will to constantly think about the moment when our reality and identity is ripped from our own hands, and then distorted and handed back to us and then questioned why it doesn't look like they thought it looked like.
posted by FirstMateKate at 9:38 AM on April 13, 2017 [17 favorites]
Probst's words are kind, and I appreciate them, but it needs noting that yes, non-cis folk are forced against our will to constantly think about the moment when our reality and identity is ripped from our own hands, and then distorted and handed back to us and then questioned why it doesn't look like they thought it looked like.
posted by FirstMateKate at 9:38 AM on April 13, 2017 [17 favorites]
FTFA:
--
And to the guy Varner: dude, you announced someone as trans as a diversion tactic because you were cranky about losing a TV game show? A Twitter apology cannot be self-abasing enough. Go away and don't come back ever.
posted by wenestvedt at 9:41 AM on April 13, 2017 [20 favorites]
On the whole, the world doesn’t treat trans people with much kindness. Even those who aren’t outwardly hateful crinkle their noses at you. When enough people crinkle their noses at you, you begin to think you stink.No one should have to live that way. I admire that pragmatism that made Zeke Smith plan out possible responses to so many different scenarios, but I regret that people like me necessitated it.
--
And to the guy Varner: dude, you announced someone as trans as a diversion tactic because you were cranky about losing a TV game show? A Twitter apology cannot be self-abasing enough. Go away and don't come back ever.
posted by wenestvedt at 9:41 AM on April 13, 2017 [20 favorites]
showbiz_liz: This guy is a fantastic writer.
Agreed: I would like to hear more tales about "Survivor" told in this writer's voice.
So many contestants on the show are instantly detestable, but I liked Zeke well enough from the parts of shows I saw during that "Gen X. versus Millennials" season.
posted by wenestvedt at 9:43 AM on April 13, 2017
Agreed: I would like to hear more tales about "Survivor" told in this writer's voice.
So many contestants on the show are instantly detestable, but I liked Zeke well enough from the parts of shows I saw during that "Gen X. versus Millennials" season.
posted by wenestvedt at 9:43 AM on April 13, 2017
The part of this that's been bugging me since I read this last night (ok, all of it bugs me, it's awful) is that Survivor's role in this is completely unaddressed. Varner didn't just out Smith to the other contestants, he outed him to Survivor's cameras, and a chain of people from editors to producers to the network were involved in actually outing him to millions around the world, to the obvious benefit of the show in terms of attention and publicity.
Is that what Zeke wanted? I read his essay, and I don't exactly know. Obviously, he didn't want any of this, but once the moment happened, there was still an opportunity to not put it on television. If we go with the framework of this being a serious, vicious assault, and I think that's a good model, doesn't airing it give the show the same responsibility for what happened as Varner?
posted by zachlipton at 9:44 AM on April 13, 2017 [30 favorites]
Is that what Zeke wanted? I read his essay, and I don't exactly know. Obviously, he didn't want any of this, but once the moment happened, there was still an opportunity to not put it on television. If we go with the framework of this being a serious, vicious assault, and I think that's a good model, doesn't airing it give the show the same responsibility for what happened as Varner?
posted by zachlipton at 9:44 AM on April 13, 2017 [30 favorites]
Is that what Zeke wanted?
Last night's episode was aired as it was with Zeke's permission and with story editing help from GLAAD.
posted by phunniemee at 9:47 AM on April 13, 2017 [33 favorites]
Last night's episode was aired as it was with Zeke's permission and with story editing help from GLAAD.
posted by phunniemee at 9:47 AM on April 13, 2017 [33 favorites]
The part of this that's been bugging me since I read this last night (ok, all of it bugs me, it's awful) is that Survivor's role in this is completely unaddressed. Varner didn't just out Smith to the other contestants, he outed him to Survivor's cameras, and a chain of people from editors to producers to the network were involved in actually outing him to millions around the world, to the obvious benefit of the show in terms of attention and publicity.
From GLAAD: "GLAAD's Transgender Media Program worked with Zeke Smith and CBS for several months to ensure that when the episode aired Zeke would have the opportunity to speak for himself about his experience." This doesn't clear up whether he was offered an option to exclude it from the show entirely, but it sounds like they at least made an effort.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:49 AM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
From GLAAD: "GLAAD's Transgender Media Program worked with Zeke Smith and CBS for several months to ensure that when the episode aired Zeke would have the opportunity to speak for himself about his experience." This doesn't clear up whether he was offered an option to exclude it from the show entirely, but it sounds like they at least made an effort.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:49 AM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
Well, presumably they could be held liable since it does put Zeke at real risk of harm as a direct result of the show's content. I'm guessing they had considerable legal involvement during this process.
I also get the distinct impression that Varner knows how much of an asshole he is. He didn't just out Zeke in that moment, he outed himself, and there's no taking it back. He'll spend the rest of his life paying for that.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:56 AM on April 13, 2017
I also get the distinct impression that Varner knows how much of an asshole he is. He didn't just out Zeke in that moment, he outed himself, and there's no taking it back. He'll spend the rest of his life paying for that.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:56 AM on April 13, 2017
I'm not sure how easily it could have been excised from the show entirely. And then people are going to wonder why cast member X is all the sudden awkward around cast member Y and probably no NDA is strong enough to keep cast member z blabbing about it to some blog... yeesh, I admire Zeke for handling this in a way to turn it into a positive but he was probably between rock and hard place in terms of maintaining whatever confidentiality he deserved.
posted by midmarch snowman at 9:58 AM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by midmarch snowman at 9:58 AM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
This doesn't clear up whether he was offered an option to exclude it from the show entirely, but it sounds like they at least made an effort.
I don't believe he would have been offered that option, or would even have taken it. He says in the original article that he had discussed with Probst what would happen if he was outed, and he said that he would deal with the situation when it happened. And the fact that it happened during a tribal council meant that it became not only relevant to the episode, but the only essential point.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:00 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
I don't believe he would have been offered that option, or would even have taken it. He says in the original article that he had discussed with Probst what would happen if he was outed, and he said that he would deal with the situation when it happened. And the fact that it happened during a tribal council meant that it became not only relevant to the episode, but the only essential point.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:00 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
I also get the distinct impression that Varner knows how much of an asshole he is. He didn't just out Zeke in that moment, he outed himself, and there's no taking it back. He'll spend the rest of his life paying for that.
People get a lot of leeway for being an asshole. I suspect that, if he does indeed spend his life paying for that, the price will be very low.
posted by Galaxor Nebulon at 10:01 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
People get a lot of leeway for being an asshole. I suspect that, if he does indeed spend his life paying for that, the price will be very low.
posted by Galaxor Nebulon at 10:01 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
I haven't watched this show in many years but I remember when Johnny Fairplay lied about his grandmother dying and that seemed like the worst thing anyone could do to win the game.
It's hard to reconcile his statement of apology with his claim at the Tribal Council that Zeke's not revealing he's transgender shows that he's capable of deception. Did he just decide he was wrong about that? I don't think so. I think he's genuinely sorry he outed Zeke but still sees it as deception. That's bullshit, Jeff.
I am impressed though that we have a popular show on a major network discussing trans issues in the way they are.
posted by bondcliff at 10:07 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
It's hard to reconcile his statement of apology with his claim at the Tribal Council that Zeke's not revealing he's transgender shows that he's capable of deception. Did he just decide he was wrong about that? I don't think so. I think he's genuinely sorry he outed Zeke but still sees it as deception. That's bullshit, Jeff.
I am impressed though that we have a popular show on a major network discussing trans issues in the way they are.
posted by bondcliff at 10:07 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
Is that what Zeke wanted?
Very, very obviously, yes.
posted by mikoroshi at 10:27 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
Very, very obviously, yes.
posted by mikoroshi at 10:27 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
I am impressed though that we have a popular show on a major network discussing trans issues in the way they are.
Me too, and I think that the silver lining about all this is that it *does* put a spotlight on the whole, "What? I thought Zeke was just a regular guy the whole time" "he IS just a regular guy" issue. It could be a good watershed moment. I certainly hope so, because there should be soemthing good that comes out of such a shitty act besides ratings and gossip columns.
posted by Autumnheart at 10:30 AM on April 13, 2017 [8 favorites]
Me too, and I think that the silver lining about all this is that it *does* put a spotlight on the whole, "What? I thought Zeke was just a regular guy the whole time" "he IS just a regular guy" issue. It could be a good watershed moment. I certainly hope so, because there should be soemthing good that comes out of such a shitty act besides ratings and gossip columns.
posted by Autumnheart at 10:30 AM on April 13, 2017 [8 favorites]
I'm curious what you all think of CBS/production's role in all of this. Big Brother cast its first transgender houseguest in 2015 with Audrey Middleton. It was a big deal, there was a lot of press before the season, she revealed it on the first episode to very positive reactions. Her gameplay was, to put it mildly, frenetic, and she burned out quickly and spent the last week walking around like this. But CBS was clearly very happy with their casting choice and how she was treated in the house (in contrast to two years prior, when the show was in the news constantly for racism and other scandals).
Then Survivor came along. First of all, you have to know that Jeff Probst looooooves when "societal issues" become part of the storyline and he gets to spend the reunion mediating dumb debates about these issues instead of anything else that happened on the show. So, Zeke was cast on last season. He had a heartwarming moment with another gay man, but did not discuss (on camera at least) being transgender. Then he got voted out, and was immediately asked to come back in a couple weeks for the next season. Which was... kind of a random choice. He had a ton of potential, gave great confessionals and was well-liked by Survivor fans at first, but ended up as kind of a middling disappointment who did not come off great in the edit. Survivor fans were very surprised when they found out he was asked back-- only 10 people have ever played back-to-back, and he just wasn't really in that league as a character (Rupert, Bobby John, Stephenie, James, Russell, Malcolm, Joe (voted by fans), Shirin (voted by fans), and Michaela are the others).
So that begs the question, did Survivor ask him back because he was a big personality with potential as a player, or because he was a big personality with potential as a player and as a major, newsworthy, "TV moment"? On the one hand, I'm happy about the representation and I get that the "public coming out" is necessary in some shape or form to move the needle on awareness/acceptance. But a part of me feels really icky because I think this is exactly what CBS wanted and expected from Zeke when they asked him back, even though Zeke went into this experience not wanting this to be part of his public story. Like, why couldn't they have cast someone who explicitly wanted to make this public?
posted by acidic at 10:30 AM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
Then Survivor came along. First of all, you have to know that Jeff Probst looooooves when "societal issues" become part of the storyline and he gets to spend the reunion mediating dumb debates about these issues instead of anything else that happened on the show. So, Zeke was cast on last season. He had a heartwarming moment with another gay man, but did not discuss (on camera at least) being transgender. Then he got voted out, and was immediately asked to come back in a couple weeks for the next season. Which was... kind of a random choice. He had a ton of potential, gave great confessionals and was well-liked by Survivor fans at first, but ended up as kind of a middling disappointment who did not come off great in the edit. Survivor fans were very surprised when they found out he was asked back-- only 10 people have ever played back-to-back, and he just wasn't really in that league as a character (Rupert, Bobby John, Stephenie, James, Russell, Malcolm, Joe (voted by fans), Shirin (voted by fans), and Michaela are the others).
So that begs the question, did Survivor ask him back because he was a big personality with potential as a player, or because he was a big personality with potential as a player and as a major, newsworthy, "TV moment"? On the one hand, I'm happy about the representation and I get that the "public coming out" is necessary in some shape or form to move the needle on awareness/acceptance. But a part of me feels really icky because I think this is exactly what CBS wanted and expected from Zeke when they asked him back, even though Zeke went into this experience not wanting this to be part of his public story. Like, why couldn't they have cast someone who explicitly wanted to make this public?
posted by acidic at 10:30 AM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
He had a ton of potential, gave great confessionals and was well-liked by Survivor fans at first, but ended up as kind of a middling disappointment who did not come off great in the edit
To be fair to CBS, Michaela Bradshaw, the other person from Zeke's cast who was asked back for this season, has the exact same player profile.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:34 AM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
To be fair to CBS, Michaela Bradshaw, the other person from Zeke's cast who was asked back for this season, has the exact same player profile.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:34 AM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
This episode was surreal and gut-wrenching to watch. I'm still processing it even just as a fan and as a queer (but cis) person; I can't imagine how it feels for Zeke. I hope he had lots of preparation and support for this moment since the filming happened last year.
I've been a huge fan of Zeke as a Survivor player and as a person ever since he first walked on the beach. He is in many ways the kind of man that I aspire to be. I don't want to push the notion that there is any "correct" way to respond to such a horrifying assault, because there isn't, but Zeke has handled this incident with immense grace and aplomb that I admire a lot. I'm also really glad that he is being very open and honest about his reactions and feelings, specifically in not letting Varner off the hook.
Zachlipton, I have read a lot of articles and commentary about what happened. It's not clear to me if he was given an explicit choice of whether or not it would be aired. I think once it happened, though, there wasn't much of a choice—if they had left it out of the broadcast, people would have known something was up and gone digging for the answers, and that likely would have been even more damaging in the long run. (Many people in the Survivor community have been speculating about his gender history since he was announced as a contestant.)
Not that it erases the horror of what happened or justifies it, but it sounds like that he went on Survivor knowing the risks, and was (at least somewhat) at peace with that possibility. He did write: "Months before I plotted how I’d respond in case of such a disaster scenario." I really hope that he had conversations with production beforehand about what would happen if he was outed.
At the end of the day, though, I just can't shake this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach. What Varner did was so profoundly and viscerally wrong. I'm equal parts angry and sad that we live in a world where it seems that education and visibility can only come at the expense of a trans person's agency.
posted by mr. manager at 10:36 AM on April 13, 2017 [11 favorites]
I've been a huge fan of Zeke as a Survivor player and as a person ever since he first walked on the beach. He is in many ways the kind of man that I aspire to be. I don't want to push the notion that there is any "correct" way to respond to such a horrifying assault, because there isn't, but Zeke has handled this incident with immense grace and aplomb that I admire a lot. I'm also really glad that he is being very open and honest about his reactions and feelings, specifically in not letting Varner off the hook.
Zachlipton, I have read a lot of articles and commentary about what happened. It's not clear to me if he was given an explicit choice of whether or not it would be aired. I think once it happened, though, there wasn't much of a choice—if they had left it out of the broadcast, people would have known something was up and gone digging for the answers, and that likely would have been even more damaging in the long run. (Many people in the Survivor community have been speculating about his gender history since he was announced as a contestant.)
Not that it erases the horror of what happened or justifies it, but it sounds like that he went on Survivor knowing the risks, and was (at least somewhat) at peace with that possibility. He did write: "Months before I plotted how I’d respond in case of such a disaster scenario." I really hope that he had conversations with production beforehand about what would happen if he was outed.
At the end of the day, though, I just can't shake this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach. What Varner did was so profoundly and viscerally wrong. I'm equal parts angry and sad that we live in a world where it seems that education and visibility can only come at the expense of a trans person's agency.
posted by mr. manager at 10:36 AM on April 13, 2017 [11 favorites]
Why did Varner take so long to let the other contestants know that he's an inconsiderate and entitled asshole?
posted by cichlid ceilidh at 10:41 AM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by cichlid ceilidh at 10:41 AM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
mr. manager: "I think once it happened, though, there wasn't much of a choice—if they had left it out of the broadcast, people would have known something was up and gone digging for the answers, and that likely would have been even more damaging in the long run."
Not to pick on you specifically, but there seems to be some nascent defenses of CBS forming along the lines of "well, they just couldn't help but out him, they have to make a TV show after all." I doubt anyone has any real feelings in their heart in that direction, because it's a monstrous thought, but perhaps we could modulate our words so that's not what it seems like.
posted by TypographicalError at 10:44 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
Not to pick on you specifically, but there seems to be some nascent defenses of CBS forming along the lines of "well, they just couldn't help but out him, they have to make a TV show after all." I doubt anyone has any real feelings in their heart in that direction, because it's a monstrous thought, but perhaps we could modulate our words so that's not what it seems like.
posted by TypographicalError at 10:44 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
Not to pick on you specifically, but there seems to be some nascent defenses of CBS forming along the lines of "well, they just couldn't help but out him, they have to make a TV show after all." I doubt anyone has any real feelings in their heart in that direction, because it's a monstrous thought, but perhaps we could modulate our words so that's not what it seems like.
I don't think that's what they were saying. What they were saying was that once the tribal council became solely about that, there was no way to edit around it. They didn't even vote.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:46 AM on April 13, 2017
I don't think that's what they were saying. What they were saying was that once the tribal council became solely about that, there was no way to edit around it. They didn't even vote.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 10:46 AM on April 13, 2017
Then he got voted out, and was immediately asked to come back in a couple weeks for the next season. Which was... kind of a random choice. He had a ton of potential, gave great confessionals and was well-liked by Survivor fans at first, but ended up as kind of a middling disappointment who did not come off great in the edit.
I'm not entirely sure this is accurate. I would describe myself as a huge Survivor fan. Not a "superfan" like the folks on reddit who obsess over the personal lives of the players (throwback to MvGX when r/survivor totally spent plenty of time outing Zeke themselves) but someone who has watched every episode, rewatches seasons from time to time, and follows the "characters". So I have feelings about Survivor.
I started Zeke's first season eyerolling at his stupid "I hate people my age" tired generational spite nonsense, and quickly went to shouting "OMG VOTE ZEKE OUT HE'S GOING TO KICK ALL YOUR ASSES" because he was clearly going to wipe the mat with them if they didn't do something. He was a great player, and has been this season, too, and certainly is far less "random" a choice for returning this season than, say, Sierra.
That's of course not to say that there weren't other production motivations for bringing Zeke back on, just that, you know, he's good at Survivor and fun to watch and is a good casting decision.
posted by phunniemee at 10:46 AM on April 13, 2017 [6 favorites]
I'm not entirely sure this is accurate. I would describe myself as a huge Survivor fan. Not a "superfan" like the folks on reddit who obsess over the personal lives of the players (throwback to MvGX when r/survivor totally spent plenty of time outing Zeke themselves) but someone who has watched every episode, rewatches seasons from time to time, and follows the "characters". So I have feelings about Survivor.
I started Zeke's first season eyerolling at his stupid "I hate people my age" tired generational spite nonsense, and quickly went to shouting "OMG VOTE ZEKE OUT HE'S GOING TO KICK ALL YOUR ASSES" because he was clearly going to wipe the mat with them if they didn't do something. He was a great player, and has been this season, too, and certainly is far less "random" a choice for returning this season than, say, Sierra.
That's of course not to say that there weren't other production motivations for bringing Zeke back on, just that, you know, he's good at Survivor and fun to watch and is a good casting decision.
posted by phunniemee at 10:46 AM on April 13, 2017 [6 favorites]
there seems to be some nascent defenses of CBS forming along the lines of "well, they just couldn't help but out him, they have to make a TV show after all." I doubt anyone has any real feelings in their heart in that direction, because it's a monstrous thought
"It's such good television, how can we not include this???"
Reality TV is shaped by editing ALL THE FUCKING TIME. CBS could have easily decided this isn't a storyline they were interested in showing and edited the show to not include it.
I'm glad the network got GLAAD involved with the episode, but really, networks don't "have to make a TV show after all". They have probably 23.75 hours of footage per contestant for every 5 minutes they show on TV. They could have easily edited around this. They chose to air it because they knew it would get the InterWebs chatting. Just as we are doing here.
Backfire: It's not convincing me to watch Survivor and thus give any eyeballs to their advertisers.
Action: Should we be boycotting the advertisers for this show, given CBS's choices?
posted by hippybear at 10:55 AM on April 13, 2017
"It's such good television, how can we not include this???"
Reality TV is shaped by editing ALL THE FUCKING TIME. CBS could have easily decided this isn't a storyline they were interested in showing and edited the show to not include it.
I'm glad the network got GLAAD involved with the episode, but really, networks don't "have to make a TV show after all". They have probably 23.75 hours of footage per contestant for every 5 minutes they show on TV. They could have easily edited around this. They chose to air it because they knew it would get the InterWebs chatting. Just as we are doing here.
Backfire: It's not convincing me to watch Survivor and thus give any eyeballs to their advertisers.
Action: Should we be boycotting the advertisers for this show, given CBS's choices?
posted by hippybear at 10:55 AM on April 13, 2017
Reality TV is shaped by editing ALL THE FUCKING TIME. CBS could have easily decided this isn't a storyline they were interested in showing and edited the show to not include it.
I really can't imagine how they could have done that without it resulting in Zeke being outed anyway. It wouldn't have been possible to just 'edit around' the tribal council like any old event from the course of the competition - that's the voting at the end of the show where it's decided who will leave. It would be like showing a race on TV and cutting out the part where they cross the finish line. I'd be surprised if it had ever been excluded throughout the entire run of the show.
By saying this I don't mean "well it would have made the show bad." If they excluded it, people would have immediately gone digging to find out why, and I doubt that it wouldn't have come out then - and in a way that Zeke had no control over.
posted by showbiz_liz at 11:01 AM on April 13, 2017 [6 favorites]
I really can't imagine how they could have done that without it resulting in Zeke being outed anyway. It wouldn't have been possible to just 'edit around' the tribal council like any old event from the course of the competition - that's the voting at the end of the show where it's decided who will leave. It would be like showing a race on TV and cutting out the part where they cross the finish line. I'd be surprised if it had ever been excluded throughout the entire run of the show.
By saying this I don't mean "well it would have made the show bad." If they excluded it, people would have immediately gone digging to find out why, and I doubt that it wouldn't have come out then - and in a way that Zeke had no control over.
posted by showbiz_liz at 11:01 AM on April 13, 2017 [6 favorites]
They could have easily edited around this.
I really do not think they could have. They would have had to stage an entire tribal council discussion. The entire group would have had to start over, pretend it hadn't happened, and improvise some other argument for voting Varner off, even while they were still sitting there upset at having gone through it. I just don't see that happening, not with this show. Shows like the "Real Housewives" do stage scenes and re-do conversations, but those are shows where there are no stakes - there's no game involved there.
posted by dnash at 11:02 AM on April 13, 2017 [8 favorites]
I really do not think they could have. They would have had to stage an entire tribal council discussion. The entire group would have had to start over, pretend it hadn't happened, and improvise some other argument for voting Varner off, even while they were still sitting there upset at having gone through it. I just don't see that happening, not with this show. Shows like the "Real Housewives" do stage scenes and re-do conversations, but those are shows where there are no stakes - there's no game involved there.
posted by dnash at 11:02 AM on April 13, 2017 [8 favorites]
Zeke Smith clearly loves Survivor as a show and with his own words has said the show has been a motivating force in his own life for bettering himself. He appears, even after all of this, to still love Survivor as a show and a game.
The only person who actually matters in this story is Zeke, and maybe burning the thing he loves to the ground wouldn't actually make his life better in any way.
posted by phunniemee at 11:05 AM on April 13, 2017 [18 favorites]
The only person who actually matters in this story is Zeke, and maybe burning the thing he loves to the ground wouldn't actually make his life better in any way.
posted by phunniemee at 11:05 AM on April 13, 2017 [18 favorites]
TypographicalError, you make a good point. To be clear, I meant that I don't think Zeke really had a realistic choice about the matter—not CBS. The Survivor community is relatively small but very intense. On top of that, Survivor is not like most other reality television. If Zeke had chosen to have it omitted it from the broadcast, it absolutely would have been obvious from the editing that something significant had been left out, and people would have found out and gossiped and speculated. I think the fallout would have been awful, probably worse than having it included in the episode. (This is, of course, all speculation—I have no idea how it would feel to make that decision in Zeke's shoes.)
I certainly hope (although I somewhat doubt) that CBS gave him the explicit choice to have it broadcast or not. It certainly seems that they worked hard on the editing to present the incident (relatively) appropriately and respectfully. The whole episode, not just the last 20 minutes, was edited noticeably different than a typical episode of Survivor; I sensed that something significant was going to happen about 5 minutes into the episode. (This is not to praise CBS or Survivor production for doing what should be seen as the absolute bare minimum; they have made many problematic choices in the past and I am highly critical of them in general.)
I'm 100% sure that legally Zeke had no real choice on the matter, and would have been aware of that when he signed his release forms before filming. He's a smart guy, and he's a huge Survivor fan, and so he knows how reality editing works. I'm convinced that he would have known that this might happen, and known how the producers would want to exploit it, and so I really do think (and hope!) that got assurance from production beforehand that they would treat his outing or coming out with respect should it happen.
posted by mr. manager at 11:09 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
I certainly hope (although I somewhat doubt) that CBS gave him the explicit choice to have it broadcast or not. It certainly seems that they worked hard on the editing to present the incident (relatively) appropriately and respectfully. The whole episode, not just the last 20 minutes, was edited noticeably different than a typical episode of Survivor; I sensed that something significant was going to happen about 5 minutes into the episode. (This is not to praise CBS or Survivor production for doing what should be seen as the absolute bare minimum; they have made many problematic choices in the past and I am highly critical of them in general.)
I'm 100% sure that legally Zeke had no real choice on the matter, and would have been aware of that when he signed his release forms before filming. He's a smart guy, and he's a huge Survivor fan, and so he knows how reality editing works. I'm convinced that he would have known that this might happen, and known how the producers would want to exploit it, and so I really do think (and hope!) that got assurance from production beforehand that they would treat his outing or coming out with respect should it happen.
posted by mr. manager at 11:09 AM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
I get that. I don't really think there's a good answer besides "it shouldn't have happened in the first place," and nobody can undo that. And even if they managed to suppress it in the edit somehow or another, there's a fair chance it would have leaked out, and at least this way Zeke has the opportunity to get his message out in his own way.
I'm just uncomfortable with the situation of "well, this assault happened, so obviously we had no choice but to put it on national television, to the obvious commercial benefit of our company regardless of its impact on a person."
posted by zachlipton at 11:09 AM on April 13, 2017 [4 favorites]
I'm just uncomfortable with the situation of "well, this assault happened, so obviously we had no choice but to put it on national television, to the obvious commercial benefit of our company regardless of its impact on a person."
posted by zachlipton at 11:09 AM on April 13, 2017 [4 favorites]
I really do think (and hope!) that got assurance from production beforehand that they would treat his outing or coming out with respect should it happen.
From the Jeff Probst interview link:
It wasn’t until after he left [the casting] that I was told he was transgender. From that point forward we agreed that if his story was to be told, he would be the one to decide when, where, and how.
As for someone else bringing it up, Zeke was fully aware someone might suspect it or bring it up and he said, “I will deal with it as it arises.”
posted by showbiz_liz at 11:12 AM on April 13, 2017 [4 favorites]
From the Jeff Probst interview link:
It wasn’t until after he left [the casting] that I was told he was transgender. From that point forward we agreed that if his story was to be told, he would be the one to decide when, where, and how.
As for someone else bringing it up, Zeke was fully aware someone might suspect it or bring it up and he said, “I will deal with it as it arises.”
posted by showbiz_liz at 11:12 AM on April 13, 2017 [4 favorites]
I'm just uncomfortable with the situation of "well, this assault happened, so obviously we had no choice but to put it on national television, to the obvious commercial benefit of our company regardless of its impact on a person."
It seems that GLAAD worked with Zeke and CBS for the past 10 months to make sure that it was aired with some amount of decency.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 11:13 AM on April 13, 2017
It seems that GLAAD worked with Zeke and CBS for the past 10 months to make sure that it was aired with some amount of decency.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 11:13 AM on April 13, 2017
He was a great player, and has been this season, too, and certainly is far less "random" a choice for returning this season than, say, Sierra.
Sure, of course! His return being surprising to certain corners of Survivor fandom does not make him a bad returnee. (Certainly doesn't compare to Sierra who is random even by last-minute-replacement-for-concussed-Natalie-Anderson standards). Maybe I am too jaded and viewed the choice to bring anyone back but Jay (who was built in a lab in Probst's basement to play Survivor) with deep suspicion.
Regarding r/survivor-- there are a whoooole lot of people on there today denying that they ever saw any of those attempted outing threads which, lol I guess maybe. The mods did seem to delete most of them as they popped up, but the people spreading that "theory" or "innocent question" (ugh) were awfully persistent.
posted by acidic at 11:13 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
Sure, of course! His return being surprising to certain corners of Survivor fandom does not make him a bad returnee. (Certainly doesn't compare to Sierra who is random even by last-minute-replacement-for-concussed-Natalie-Anderson standards). Maybe I am too jaded and viewed the choice to bring anyone back but Jay (who was built in a lab in Probst's basement to play Survivor) with deep suspicion.
Regarding r/survivor-- there are a whoooole lot of people on there today denying that they ever saw any of those attempted outing threads which, lol I guess maybe. The mods did seem to delete most of them as they popped up, but the people spreading that "theory" or "innocent question" (ugh) were awfully persistent.
posted by acidic at 11:13 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
I'm just uncomfortable with the situation of "well, this assault happened, so obviously we had no choice but to put it on national television, to the obvious commercial benefit of our company regardless of its impact on a person."
I'm gonna be the nth person to chime in a note that CBS talked to Zeke, got his permission and worked with GLAAD to make present this shitstorm in the best possible light. Yeah, they got some benefit but as someone who's watched Survivor for that 15 years, Probst clearly loves the show and doesn't want it to appear as uncaring of people. It's not perfect but they do a decent job of portraying people well that have behaved well.
I think everyone worked out much better than I ever would have credited society. Everyone at the tribal council was thoroughly appalled and shocked and instantly sided with Zeke, as they should have. Zeke himself was awesome in handling it and Varner was rightfully shamed by everyone, including the host.
As to whether the incident could have been edited out, probably. Tribal councils tend to g on for hours, we just see 10 minutes of carefully selected footage. The show is storyboarded after filming stops, editors and producers pick the storylines they want to show and the audience sees what they're told. They could have come up with a storyline (perhaps a weak one) to explain Varner getting voted out, no doubt with heavy editing.
I'm glad they didn't though.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:24 AM on April 13, 2017
I'm gonna be the nth person to chime in a note that CBS talked to Zeke, got his permission and worked with GLAAD to make present this shitstorm in the best possible light. Yeah, they got some benefit but as someone who's watched Survivor for that 15 years, Probst clearly loves the show and doesn't want it to appear as uncaring of people. It's not perfect but they do a decent job of portraying people well that have behaved well.
I think everyone worked out much better than I ever would have credited society. Everyone at the tribal council was thoroughly appalled and shocked and instantly sided with Zeke, as they should have. Zeke himself was awesome in handling it and Varner was rightfully shamed by everyone, including the host.
As to whether the incident could have been edited out, probably. Tribal councils tend to g on for hours, we just see 10 minutes of carefully selected footage. The show is storyboarded after filming stops, editors and producers pick the storylines they want to show and the audience sees what they're told. They could have come up with a storyline (perhaps a weak one) to explain Varner getting voted out, no doubt with heavy editing.
I'm glad they didn't though.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:24 AM on April 13, 2017
I just want to say that I've haven't seen the show, but judging by the first link he seems like a genuinely stand up guy, and he is such a fucking cutiepie??? I am very here for Trans Cutiepie and Reality Star Zeke. Please, tv networks, replace all non cutiepies with new and improved Trans Cutiepies so that little old ladies in the grocery store will see their pictures on magazines and think they are, in fact, cutiepies.
posted by FirstMateKate at 11:57 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by FirstMateKate at 11:57 AM on April 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
I watched this last night and I'm honestly still shaken up about it today. I can't imagine how traumatic it would be to not only be outed suddenly on national TV, but also have it done as proof of how "deceptive" you are.
I really want to bring everyone's attention to the immediate outpouring of love from everyone else on the tribe and how they shut down Varner. There was no "whaaaaaa?", no "omg you're transgender? scandalous!" They told Varner that that's personal, it was totally unnecessary, that it was so wrong to out him, that coming out was Zeke's decision to make. They hurt for Zeke in that moment.
I've seen stuff around the internet from closeted transgender people about how much seeing that support from a diverse group of friends (including one who talked about how she came from a conservative background and didn't get the opportunity to know a lot of LGBT people but she loved Zeke so much and his being transgender didn't change that at all) meant a lot to them. I hope the love those people showed there makes waves across the world.
posted by BeginAgain at 12:09 PM on April 13, 2017 [33 favorites]
I really want to bring everyone's attention to the immediate outpouring of love from everyone else on the tribe and how they shut down Varner. There was no "whaaaaaa?", no "omg you're transgender? scandalous!" They told Varner that that's personal, it was totally unnecessary, that it was so wrong to out him, that coming out was Zeke's decision to make. They hurt for Zeke in that moment.
I've seen stuff around the internet from closeted transgender people about how much seeing that support from a diverse group of friends (including one who talked about how she came from a conservative background and didn't get the opportunity to know a lot of LGBT people but she loved Zeke so much and his being transgender didn't change that at all) meant a lot to them. I hope the love those people showed there makes waves across the world.
posted by BeginAgain at 12:09 PM on April 13, 2017 [33 favorites]
Wow, that tribal council video is worth watching. I read Zeke's article and other stuff about it today, but the magnitude of Varner's awfulness goes to another level when you watch it. He realizes that it's backfired badly and starts apologizing and crying, and then still says Zeke was being deceptive and tries to defend himself.
posted by Mavri at 12:26 PM on April 13, 2017 [7 favorites]
posted by Mavri at 12:26 PM on April 13, 2017 [7 favorites]
Am I missing something? In Varner's "apology" he says he's sorry he recklessly revealed something he mistakenly believed everyone already knew but the clip I saw had him muttering There's something about Zeke nobody knows, claiming Smith was guilty of deception on levels that these guys don't even understand and asking Smith Why haven't you told anyone you're transgender?
Is he really trying to claim the outing was a mistake after all that, or did the clip take things out of context?
posted by layceepee at 12:28 PM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
Is he really trying to claim the outing was a mistake after all that, or did the clip take things out of context?
posted by layceepee at 12:28 PM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
(including one who talked about how she came from a conservative background and didn't get the opportunity to know a lot of LGBT people but she loved Zeke so much and his being transgender didn't change that at all)
Not just "a conservative background" but Sarah is a police officer from Iowa who had in her pre-show bio that one of her greatest dreams in life is to one day read the entire Bible. Having that person process all of what happened--her friendship with Zeke, her lack of personal experience knowing transgender folks, the outing, Varner's crappy responses at tribal council--on television for everyone to see, and that person turn around and describe (accurately and succinctly) Varner's actions as "malicious" is something that, I think, has a lot of value. Conservative-religious-cop ticks a lot of boxes for a specific reality tv show stereotype, and we all watched as her heart broke for Zeke in that moment. That's important for people to see.
posted by phunniemee at 12:28 PM on April 13, 2017 [37 favorites]
Not just "a conservative background" but Sarah is a police officer from Iowa who had in her pre-show bio that one of her greatest dreams in life is to one day read the entire Bible. Having that person process all of what happened--her friendship with Zeke, her lack of personal experience knowing transgender folks, the outing, Varner's crappy responses at tribal council--on television for everyone to see, and that person turn around and describe (accurately and succinctly) Varner's actions as "malicious" is something that, I think, has a lot of value. Conservative-religious-cop ticks a lot of boxes for a specific reality tv show stereotype, and we all watched as her heart broke for Zeke in that moment. That's important for people to see.
posted by phunniemee at 12:28 PM on April 13, 2017 [37 favorites]
MTV: Survivor Handled Last Night's Outing of a Transgender Man Irresponsibly
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:40 PM on April 13, 2017
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:40 PM on April 13, 2017
Wow this was such a moment to watch. My wife and I watch it regularly, and our 14 year old son is a big fan. We were all eager to see if Varner would be able to pull off an upset and get the votes switched to Ozzy. The edit seemed to indicate he was convincing people, and I was actually a little impressed with Varner because he's never been that strategic a player before, and then that hammer fell. You could tell he hadn't quite intended it to come out that way, but it's damn hard to see any positive way he could have meant to reveal that. Zeke's good at hiding things, perhaps? I mean, it's not quite saying "deceptive", but that's a pretty big stretch.
His defense that he thought everyone knew rings hollow if he's trying to show Zeke was keeping things secret. He had to know he was outing Zeke in order for his point to make sense. Which leads me to one point I haven't seen anywhere - how did Varner know? Did Zeke reveal it to Varner, or did Varner's work in the LGBTQ community let him recognize the signs?
posted by GhostintheMachine at 12:42 PM on April 13, 2017
His defense that he thought everyone knew rings hollow if he's trying to show Zeke was keeping things secret. He had to know he was outing Zeke in order for his point to make sense. Which leads me to one point I haven't seen anywhere - how did Varner know? Did Zeke reveal it to Varner, or did Varner's work in the LGBTQ community let him recognize the signs?
posted by GhostintheMachine at 12:42 PM on April 13, 2017
Is he really trying to claim the outing was a mistake after all that, or did the clip take things out of context?
I think he was just scrambling to say anything at all that he thought might make him look a tiny bit better, which of course made him look way way worse. If after he started crying he had just said something like "I'm sorry, you're right, that was indefensible" and then SHUT THE HELL UP he would have come off more like a guy who made an incredibly fucked-up mistake while blinded by a million-dollar prize.
As it is, I literally muted the video whenever he started to speak because I couldn't stomach his bullshit excuses.
posted by showbiz_liz at 12:42 PM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
I think he was just scrambling to say anything at all that he thought might make him look a tiny bit better, which of course made him look way way worse. If after he started crying he had just said something like "I'm sorry, you're right, that was indefensible" and then SHUT THE HELL UP he would have come off more like a guy who made an incredibly fucked-up mistake while blinded by a million-dollar prize.
As it is, I literally muted the video whenever he started to speak because I couldn't stomach his bullshit excuses.
posted by showbiz_liz at 12:42 PM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
how did Varner know? Did Zeke reveal it to Varner, or did Varner's work in the LGBTQ community let him recognize the signs?
Varner said he figured it out himself.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:44 PM on April 13, 2017
Varner said he figured it out himself.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:44 PM on April 13, 2017
Zeke's good at hiding things, perhaps?
This statement rubs me the wrong way when I think about trans people I know who simply want to live a life. I can't clearly state exactly why, but "hiding things" feels like a bad way to regard trans people living their lives.
posted by hippybear at 12:49 PM on April 13, 2017 [16 favorites]
This statement rubs me the wrong way when I think about trans people I know who simply want to live a life. I can't clearly state exactly why, but "hiding things" feels like a bad way to regard trans people living their lives.
posted by hippybear at 12:49 PM on April 13, 2017 [16 favorites]
I can't clearly state exactly why, but "hiding things" feels like a bad way to regard trans people living their lives.
I think because it implies that anyone who is trans who isn't actively going around telling people is "hiding" it which means whomever is complaining about it thinks they have a right to know something that is 100% none of their business.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 12:54 PM on April 13, 2017 [15 favorites]
I think because it implies that anyone who is trans who isn't actively going around telling people is "hiding" it which means whomever is complaining about it thinks they have a right to know something that is 100% none of their business.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 12:54 PM on April 13, 2017 [15 favorites]
Am I missing something?
No, you totally got that Varner's excuses were incredibly lame and self-serving
MTV: Survivor Handled Last Night's Outing of a Transgender Man Irresponsibly
If CBS really wanted to treat its conservative audience to a teaching moment, then breaking the fourth wall and discussing the vileness of the stereotype Varner used in an attempt to keep himself in a game show might have been worth considering.
Uh writer person, that's pretty much what the host of the show did. Jeff Probst specifically talked about whether Zeke was transgender or not had nothing to do with the show or his game playing, that Varner was doing some reprehensible on a global scale and basically "Dude, what is wrong with you". Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:57 PM on April 13, 2017 [4 favorites]
No, you totally got that Varner's excuses were incredibly lame and self-serving
MTV: Survivor Handled Last Night's Outing of a Transgender Man Irresponsibly
If CBS really wanted to treat its conservative audience to a teaching moment, then breaking the fourth wall and discussing the vileness of the stereotype Varner used in an attempt to keep himself in a game show might have been worth considering.
Uh writer person, that's pretty much what the host of the show did. Jeff Probst specifically talked about whether Zeke was transgender or not had nothing to do with the show or his game playing, that Varner was doing some reprehensible on a global scale and basically "Dude, what is wrong with you". Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:57 PM on April 13, 2017 [4 favorites]
Yes, definitely a resounding fucking yes to both hippybear and Mrs. Pterodactyl, but also: If we all stopped assuming everyone was cis, there would be no frame of reference for trans people to either a)out themselves, or b)"hide something". You can't hide a fact unless the opposite of the fact is the assumed default.
posted by FirstMateKate at 12:58 PM on April 13, 2017 [8 favorites]
posted by FirstMateKate at 12:58 PM on April 13, 2017 [8 favorites]
I think because it implies that anyone who is trans who isn't actively going around telling people is "hiding" it which means whomever is complaining about it thinks they have a right to know something that is 100% none of their business.
I thought about this a little more and I think it's what I said AND ALSO that it implies that people should be actively talking about being trans to everyone which is something you only do about stuff that matters. I don't talk about getting my wisdom teeth out with every person I meet but that doesn't mean I'm hiding it, just that it's not something I think people need to know to interact with me.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 1:00 PM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
I thought about this a little more and I think it's what I said AND ALSO that it implies that people should be actively talking about being trans to everyone which is something you only do about stuff that matters. I don't talk about getting my wisdom teeth out with every person I meet but that doesn't mean I'm hiding it, just that it's not something I think people need to know to interact with me.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 1:00 PM on April 13, 2017 [5 favorites]
Am I missing something? In Varner's "apology" he says he's sorry he recklessly revealed something he mistakenly believed everyone already knew but the clip I saw had him muttering There's something about Zeke nobody knows, claiming Smith was guilty of deception on levels that these guys don't even understand and asking Smith Why haven't you told anyone you're transgender?There are a lot of behind the scenes videos and interviews from Varner that you can look up if you want; I won't link them here, because I think we need to be careful not to centre Varner in this narrative. I do believe there is some genuine nuance in Varner's intentions; I certainly don't think he's a malicious person as much as a selfish and reckless person with a fuck-ton of cis privilege of which he is unaware. But I don't care about his intentions, because regardless of what they were, he tapped into some dangerous and painful stereotypes of trans people and did permanent damage in his outing of Zeke.
Is he really trying to claim the outing was a mistake after all that, or did the clip take things out of context?
However: I do think it could be useful to understand how and why Varner fucked up so badly. I don't think it's an accident that Zeke was outed by a cis gay man who is a self-professed queer advocate. I think one of Varner's biggest mistakes was his assumption that his experience as a cis gay man was similar to Zeke's experience as a trans man. I also get the feeling that Varner mistakenly and tragically thought that his (apparent) proximity to and knowledge of trans people and their experiences in his real life meant that he was somehow more entitled to be able to know about or reveal Zeke's history. Honestly, this is pure conjecture, but I even have a queasy feeling that Varner maybe thought himself a bit clever for "figuring out" that Zeke was trans—he certainly thought that revealing it might help him. And on top of all that, Varner also attempted to use his queer identity and experiences to downplay the significance of what he did.
I think there are a lot of lessons here for cis gay people like myself to reflect on how we treat and think about trans people and the issues they face (beyond the most important and obvious message of not fucking outing people). I am also reflecting on why we cis people seem to require horrible assaults like this to happen before we actually start considering changing our behaviour.
posted by mr. manager at 1:14 PM on April 13, 2017 [36 favorites]
I don't really buy the line about the show's having no option to edit this incident out of the episode, considering producer Mark Burnett apparently had no trouble permanently disappearing a shit ton of damning footage of Donald Trump saying sexist and racist things on the set of a different reality TV show he produced a few years back...
posted by Atom Eyes at 2:20 PM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Atom Eyes at 2:20 PM on April 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
I live in a town where a transgender female used to work at a now-defunct video store, before they transitioned. Very quiet and unassuming. Then several months later, I see that she is working at a new place in the same neighborhood, and had apparently fully transitioned to female. So, I know that she used to be the same person that worked at the video store, but it never occurred to me that telling other people this fact would constitute assault. Maybe because she stayed in the local area, so I assumed that most long-time neighborhood residents and regulars were aware, just as I was? At any rate, I never thought about it from the perspective of how it went down on survivor. for me, it's a lesson learned.
posted by KillaSeal at 2:22 PM on April 13, 2017
posted by KillaSeal at 2:22 PM on April 13, 2017
Zeke Smith says he had 'unprecedented autonomy' in telling the story of his Survivor outing:
posted by mr. manager at 2:54 PM on April 13, 2017 [17 favorites]
I love Survivor and I was drawn to apply to Survivor because of the integrity in the storytelling. And when I first applied, I didn’t tell casting that I was trans. That was developed later in our relationship. And I had a chat with Jeff Probst in which we agreed if, how, and when I’m gonna talk about this part of my life—it’s gonna be up to me, as opposed to being outed by a fellow contestant being the exception.Really glad to hear this. I don't think we should stop being critical or skeptical of CBS or Survivor producers, but it really does seem like the aftermath of this situation was handled about as well as it could have been.
But in the aftermath of being outed, I’ve been granted unprecedented autonomy in how I wanted to tell my story. We started having conversations all the way back in Fiji nine months ago about the care with which this episode was going to be handled. I came to Jeff and asked if I could write a personal essay about what happened and he immediately said yes. And I was really proud of how I responded. And I wanted the world to see how much I’d grown and I also thought by showing what happened, maybe it wouldn’t happen to someone else and something good could come of it.
posted by mr. manager at 2:54 PM on April 13, 2017 [17 favorites]
I can't clearly state exactly why, but "hiding things" feels like a bad way to regard trans people living their lives.
For one thing it assumes the stupid premise that no cis person is ever hiding anything.
posted by ejs at 3:06 PM on April 13, 2017 [9 favorites]
For one thing it assumes the stupid premise that no cis person is ever hiding anything.
posted by ejs at 3:06 PM on April 13, 2017 [9 favorites]
Finding the right words to describe what I mean is difficult, but I'm trying to draw a distinction between "hiding" something like being married, being an ex-NFL star, and being trans, with the idea of being "deceptive" in saying your grandmother is dead when she's not. I see there being somewhat of a distinction, the difference between covering something up and simply not talking about it. I just had the impression from watching this season that Varner was intending a more benign motive.
At this point it's beginning to feel more like I'm saying at least Hitler didn't use Sarin gas, trying to determine shades of black. There's a distinction in what Varner did, but I don't think it much matters. Even if he had the purest of motives to do what he did, what he did is indefensible.
posted by GhostintheMachine at 4:01 PM on April 13, 2017
At this point it's beginning to feel more like I'm saying at least Hitler didn't use Sarin gas, trying to determine shades of black. There's a distinction in what Varner did, but I don't think it much matters. Even if he had the purest of motives to do what he did, what he did is indefensible.
posted by GhostintheMachine at 4:01 PM on April 13, 2017
I don't think it's an accident that Zeke was outed by a cis gay man who is a self-professed queer advocate. I think one of Varner's biggest mistakes was his assumption that his experience as a cis gay man was similar to Zeke's experience as a trans man.
As a trans guy I experience this a lot. They think they're allies, but they don't realize their privilege.
Regardless of Zeke's reaction or his agreement to let this air, it is sickening that Varner's words furthered the stereotype of trans people as "deceptive." This is what gets people (mostly trans women) killed. There's a handful of people who need to know I'm trans, and they all have "MD" after their names.
posted by AFABulous at 4:02 PM on April 13, 2017 [25 favorites]
As a trans guy I experience this a lot. They think they're allies, but they don't realize their privilege.
Regardless of Zeke's reaction or his agreement to let this air, it is sickening that Varner's words furthered the stereotype of trans people as "deceptive." This is what gets people (mostly trans women) killed. There's a handful of people who need to know I'm trans, and they all have "MD" after their names.
posted by AFABulous at 4:02 PM on April 13, 2017 [25 favorites]
I live in a town where a transgender female used to work at a now-defunct video store, before they transitioned. Very quiet and unassuming. Then several months later, I see that she is working at a new place in the same neighborhood, and had apparently fully transitioned to female. So, I know that she used to be the same person that worked at the video store, but it never occurred to me that telling other people this fact would constitute assault.
I'm glad you are open to learning, so here are a few other things to keep in mind:
1. There is no reason to talk to anyone about her transition except to gossip, and gossiping is wrong. Gossip will spread, and you don't know who to whom. Her boss may not know. In most states there are no employment anti-discrimination laws that cover gender orientation. Or housing. Does her landlord know?
3. Besides the physical danger, outing hurts trans people emotionally because it shows that you think their history is more important than their present, and that their story - and the timing of its telling - belongs to you, when it doesn't. It's a very clear sign of disrespect and I have cut off relationships over it, not because it's super duper secret (I'm sure if you dig you can find my real name) but because my past and present belongs to me and me alone.
posted by AFABulous at 4:18 PM on April 13, 2017 [30 favorites]
I'm glad you are open to learning, so here are a few other things to keep in mind:
1. There is no reason to talk to anyone about her transition except to gossip, and gossiping is wrong. Gossip will spread, and you don't know who to whom. Her boss may not know. In most states there are no employment anti-discrimination laws that cover gender orientation. Or housing. Does her landlord know?
1a. caveat: you witness a horrible accident where she's badly injured and unable to speak, and an EMT needs to insert a catheter RIGHT NOW or she will die, but you notice they grabbed the wrong kind. Then you have my permission to speak up. However, this scenario will never happen to you.2. Trans women get harassed, assaulted and killed just for being trans, all the time. Just last week a friend was walking down the street, minding her own business, and had epithets yelled at her and food thrown at her. She's been chased by pickup trucks.
3. Besides the physical danger, outing hurts trans people emotionally because it shows that you think their history is more important than their present, and that their story - and the timing of its telling - belongs to you, when it doesn't. It's a very clear sign of disrespect and I have cut off relationships over it, not because it's super duper secret (I'm sure if you dig you can find my real name) but because my past and present belongs to me and me alone.
posted by AFABulous at 4:18 PM on April 13, 2017 [30 favorites]
I'd think this has been in the story stack since Zeke was first cast. Zeke may not have directly told the casting director/producers about being trans, but they could have figured it out, and added it as a sidebar to any story line.
posted by Ideefixe at 7:33 PM on April 13, 2017
posted by Ideefixe at 7:33 PM on April 13, 2017
Besides the physical danger, outing hurts trans people emotionally because it shows that you think their history is more important than their present, and that their story - and the timing of its telling - belongs to you, when it doesn't.
To be honest, in some ways I feel the same way about the coverage of this. It's deeply uncomfortable to have cis people valiantly assert that trans people are not obliged to be out. Yes! True! Finally someone got the message! But... we're not obliged to be invisible either and that's what we're conditioned to hear "you shouldn't have to tell anyone" as.
Did Zeke reveal it to Varner, or did Varner's work in the LGBTQ community let him recognize the signs?
There aren't "signs" unless you're intimately acquainted with the trans community (and trans men at that), which, as a rule, cis gay men are not. (And then you have transdar that makes you think everyone is trans, so there still aren't "signs".) Especially not cis gay men who talk about how trans people are "deceptive".
Jennifer Finney Boyle
Boylan.
posted by hoyland at 7:55 PM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
To be honest, in some ways I feel the same way about the coverage of this. It's deeply uncomfortable to have cis people valiantly assert that trans people are not obliged to be out. Yes! True! Finally someone got the message! But... we're not obliged to be invisible either and that's what we're conditioned to hear "you shouldn't have to tell anyone" as.
Did Zeke reveal it to Varner, or did Varner's work in the LGBTQ community let him recognize the signs?
There aren't "signs" unless you're intimately acquainted with the trans community (and trans men at that), which, as a rule, cis gay men are not. (And then you have transdar that makes you think everyone is trans, so there still aren't "signs".) Especially not cis gay men who talk about how trans people are "deceptive".
Jennifer Finney Boyle
Boylan.
posted by hoyland at 7:55 PM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
The linked articles make it clear that the producers knew that he's trans and agreed with his wanting to be not "the trans Survivor competitor" but "Zeke the Survivor competitor", and that they'd follow his lead as far as him coming out.
You seem to be aiming for some kind of gotcha that isn't there.
posted by Lexica at 7:58 PM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
You seem to be aiming for some kind of gotcha that isn't there.
posted by Lexica at 7:58 PM on April 13, 2017 [3 favorites]
"There is much to discuss. But for tonight: I'm proud of my best friend. I love him very much."
- Survivor Season 33 (Millennials vs. Gen X) Runner-Up Hannah Shapiro on her best friend, Zeke Smith
posted by The Gooch at 8:45 PM on April 13, 2017 [4 favorites]
So, I have a former housemate who is a trans guy. I did not know this for the year and change we lived together, because a) it was none of my fucking business and b) I'm pretty sure he assumed his girlfriend (who I'd known much longer) had said something, and she assumed he had said something, and it was none of my fucking business anyway so it never came up. I only know now because we're still Facebook friends and he was complaining fairly recently about the crappiness of medical care for trans folks in the town he lives in now.
I bring this up because this is literally the only context where it is even slightly appropriate to talk about someone else's gender history without their express permission, and you are all anonymous Internet strangers who do not know him or me IRL, and frankly I would have known better than to fucking out someone on national television even if I'd never known a single trans person in my entire life. What the fuck. Jesus.
(also, he was a great housemate and I miss his cats. he would actually be a pretty great Survivor contestant, now I think about it: he could fix literally anything and the vegetable garden he put in still manages a volunteer pumpkin every now and again.)
posted by nonasuch at 10:17 PM on April 13, 2017
I bring this up because this is literally the only context where it is even slightly appropriate to talk about someone else's gender history without their express permission, and you are all anonymous Internet strangers who do not know him or me IRL, and frankly I would have known better than to fucking out someone on national television even if I'd never known a single trans person in my entire life. What the fuck. Jesus.
(also, he was a great housemate and I miss his cats. he would actually be a pretty great Survivor contestant, now I think about it: he could fix literally anything and the vegetable garden he put in still manages a volunteer pumpkin every now and again.)
posted by nonasuch at 10:17 PM on April 13, 2017
(also, he was a great housemate and I miss his cats. he would actually be a pretty great Survivor contestant, now I think about it: he could fix literally anything and the vegetable garden he put in still manages a volunteer pumpkin every now and again.)
Minor side note: Those are great skills but are in no way indicate that person would be a great Survivor contestant. It's a social game and the ability to bond with others and get along with them in close quarters, 24/7, is far more important.
End site note.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:12 AM on April 14, 2017
Minor side note: Those are great skills but are in no way indicate that person would be a great Survivor contestant. It's a social game and the ability to bond with others and get along with them in close quarters, 24/7, is far more important.
End site note.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:12 AM on April 14, 2017
I was just listening to Varner's exit interview with Rob Cesternino. While not doubting he is sincerely contrite, this really made me question what, exactly, the best method is to demonstrate remorse after doing a truly terrible thing. Maybe it's just timing: Varner has had many months to process this while I was listening the day after watching this episode with his heinous behavior fresh in my mind. But listening to Varner go on and on about trans rights, fighting against anti-trans bigotry, etc., was almost cringe-worthy, like listening to OJ Simpson or Ray Rice give a PSA on domestic abuse.
posted by The Gooch at 9:59 AM on April 14, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by The Gooch at 9:59 AM on April 14, 2017 [2 favorites]
Certainly in the moment Varner seemed more concerned with his own feelings and regret than about Zeke's. That was one of the things that bugged me most watching the clip: how dare you cry and interrupt people to defend yourself and go in for a hug wtih Zeke to make YOURSELF feel better after what you just did?
posted by misskaz at 10:21 AM on April 14, 2017 [5 favorites]
posted by misskaz at 10:21 AM on April 14, 2017 [5 favorites]
If the obsession with trans people's genitals and appearance applied to cis people too, 'hiding' these things would be considered deceptive:
your bra size
the length of your penis, flaccid and erect
your current menstrual cycle date
your fertility treatment history
your pregnancy/miscarriage/abortion history
your sperm count
the details of how you 'lost' your 'virginity'
your hair loss/baldness/toupee history
your height and weight
In trying to make this list, I realize it's not a perfect analogy - there are for example women who are expected to publicize their height, weight, and bra size as part of their jobs.
posted by medusa at 8:18 PM on April 14, 2017 [2 favorites]
your bra size
the length of your penis, flaccid and erect
your current menstrual cycle date
your fertility treatment history
your pregnancy/miscarriage/abortion history
your sperm count
the details of how you 'lost' your 'virginity'
your hair loss/baldness/toupee history
your height and weight
In trying to make this list, I realize it's not a perfect analogy - there are for example women who are expected to publicize their height, weight, and bra size as part of their jobs.
posted by medusa at 8:18 PM on April 14, 2017 [2 favorites]
It's now being reported that Varner had been fired from his job as a realtor.
I'm torn. On the one hand, what Varner did could have resulted in much much worse for Zeke than losing his job.
On the other hand, where do you draw the line?
But on reflection, Varner had no right to a job, and should have thought about the ramifications of what he might do and say on national television. He clearly didn't care about what it could mean for Zeke.
Finally, I've found Varner's statements since this aired problematic on multiple levels. Eg when he talked about the time he had spent with organisations and how he'd "even joined the boards on some of them", I wanted the interviewer to ask, "which ones?" - cause I'm surprised any org would have the risk tolerance to add someone link Varner to their boards, especially as he doesn't seem to have m/any qualifications in that area?
posted by smoke at 4:01 AM on April 16, 2017 [1 favorite]
I'm torn. On the one hand, what Varner did could have resulted in much much worse for Zeke than losing his job.
On the other hand, where do you draw the line?
But on reflection, Varner had no right to a job, and should have thought about the ramifications of what he might do and say on national television. He clearly didn't care about what it could mean for Zeke.
Finally, I've found Varner's statements since this aired problematic on multiple levels. Eg when he talked about the time he had spent with organisations and how he'd "even joined the boards on some of them", I wanted the interviewer to ask, "which ones?" - cause I'm surprised any org would have the risk tolerance to add someone link Varner to their boards, especially as he doesn't seem to have m/any qualifications in that area?
posted by smoke at 4:01 AM on April 16, 2017 [1 favorite]
Being a realtor means belonging to a profession that has a code of ethics. Article 10 under "Duties to the Public" seems relevant:
posted by Lexica at 3:03 PM on April 16, 2017 [1 favorite]
Article 10 (Case Interpretations for Article 10)as does Standard of Practice 10-3:
REALTORS® shall not deny equal professional services to any person for reasons of race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status, national origin, sexual orientation, or gender identity. REALTORS® shall not be parties to any plan or agreement to discriminate against a person or persons on the basis of race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status, national origin, sexual orientation, or gender identity. (Amended 1/14)
REALTORS®, in their real estate employment practices, shall not discriminate against any person or persons on the basis of race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status, national origin, sexual orientation, or gender identity. (Amended 1/14)
REALTORS® shall not print, display or circulate any statement or advertisement with respect to selling or renting of a property that indicates any preference, limitations or discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status, national origin, sexual orientation, or gender identity. (Adopted 1/94, Renumbered 1/05 and 1/06, Amended 1/14)While they weren't conducting a real estate transaction, I think it's not unreasonable if his employers told him "you outed somebody on international television because you didn't want to lose a game being played for financial reward. This is a business where reputation and being perceived as ethical and trustworthy are essential, and we're not willing to give the impression of supporting your breach of ethics by continuing to pay you to represent us."
posted by Lexica at 3:03 PM on April 16, 2017 [1 favorite]
TBH, it sounds like they said "this is way too hot for us" - and dropped him because of that, rather than any ethical concerns.
posted by smoke at 3:13 PM on April 16, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by smoke at 3:13 PM on April 16, 2017 [1 favorite]
I'm way late to the conversation but I just wanted to add one thing about watching the tribal council. I had seen it late, though without any spoilers and the silver lining of it all was the reaction of all the other tribe members. The immediate and passionate reaction of everyone just going "VARNER. YOURE AN ASSHOLE AND LEAVE MY FRIEND ALONE." was amazing to see on public television, setting the example of what behavior is ok. Ty's clear statement "you don't out people. You don't make that choice for them." is so important for all of America to hear.
posted by raccoon409 at 8:46 AM on April 18, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by raccoon409 at 8:46 AM on April 18, 2017 [6 favorites]
I agree, raccoon409. It really was an incredible and instantaneous outpouring of support.
posted by graventy at 1:37 PM on April 21, 2017
posted by graventy at 1:37 PM on April 21, 2017
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