Lawrence says that objects have no meaning, but simply exist.
July 10, 2017 2:09 AM   Subscribe

Boiled to remove its toxins, Amanita muscaria can usually be eaten with impunity. Usually.

A few highlights from a brief account of accidental intoxication:
19:38. Our "highs" seem to have stabilized. Lawrence is again trying to identify some of our mushrooms. Tonya says she feels almost normal, whereas Lawrence says he can't feel normal because he isn't.

20:30. Tonya's feeling clumsy and poorly coordinated, but otherwise okay. Lawrence can't seem to dial a friend's phone number, and likewise can't close the sliding door without getting his hand stuck in it. Also, he says the mushrooms we're trying to I.D. are talking to him.

21:54. At a Chinese restaurant. Tonya thinks our food has a consciousness of its own as well as a texture that's "very real." She also thinks everyone in the restaurant is high, and that Lawrence likes Republicans, although he's earlier made it clear that he doesn't.
posted by automatic cabinet (21 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite
 
Take notes!

My notes would include things like "Huh. Heh. I am Neanderthal." and "Look how these trees form a perfect circle." and "Well, then the wolves will just have to eat me."
posted by pracowity at 3:02 AM on July 10, 2017 [2 favorites]


Tonya thinks our food has a consciousness of its own as well as a texture that's "very real."

protip: don't shit until tomorrow
posted by thelonius at 3:06 AM on July 10, 2017 [10 favorites]


22:10. Lawrence is drinking a beer

Don't combine booze with wild mushrooms. Some kinds of wild mushrooms which are OK are nasty with booze. Inky caps come to mind.

(Now ponders the effects of prescription meds and wild mushrooms)
posted by rough ashlar at 3:06 AM on July 10, 2017 [5 favorites]


Boiled to remove its toxins, Amanita muscaria can usually be eaten with impunity. Usually.

"Once we've finished that, we'll show you how to denature the THC in your cannabis in order to make a tasty and non-hallucinogenic salad."
posted by sebastienbailard at 3:48 AM on July 10, 2017 [19 favorites]


Lawrence says that objects have no meaning, but simply exist.
That's very much the tone I remember from the lectures in my C++ class.
posted by Wolfdog at 4:36 AM on July 10, 2017 [24 favorites]


Lawrence is again trying to identify some of our mushrooms. Tonya says she feels almost normal, whereas Lawrence says he can't feel normal because he isn't.

Mushroom identification while tripping balls? Maybe not the best idea ever, particularly when the tripping was itself caused by a mistake.

My mushroom identification skills are pretty much limited to knowing puffballs, chanterelle, and morrells, on the one hand, and knowing Amanita muscaria and a few others in the "do not eat" category. I hadn't known that amanita could be eaten at all; amateurs preparing incorrectly is in the same category as preparing yourself some fugu based on reading an article once.

There are a number of foods I can think of that have to be prepared correctly to avoid potentially unpleasant consequences, like bitter cassava, ackee, and the afore-mentioned fugu; I am happy to eat them but only when prepared by someone who actually knows what they are doing.
posted by Dip Flash at 5:25 AM on July 10, 2017


As someone who cant stand the texture of cooked mushrooms, the thought of eating a boiled mushroom disgusts me.
posted by Splunge at 5:53 AM on July 10, 2017


For a real culinary treat, drink the urine of someone who has eaten the mushrooms.
posted by Obscure Reference at 5:57 AM on July 10, 2017


Seems like they had exceptional good fortune with dosing and response (possibly the boiling, although ineffective for its intended purpose, may have ended up favouring the more hallucinogenic and less unpleasant aspects of the make-up of amanita muscaria's chemical cocktail? Although it also sounds like they were lucky with set and setting.). Certainly, I don't think I've ever read an account of a fly agaric experience which sounded as positive and relaxed as their evening. People usually seem to spend much more time talking about feeling sick and confused, and much less about building positive and mutually respectful relationships with various comestibles.
posted by howfar at 6:13 AM on July 10, 2017 [2 favorites]


I was working in a local grocery during my undergrad. One evening a co-worker and her gentleman can in to the store on the way home from a mushroom hunting trip. When approached she excitedly revealed the beautiful mushroom she'd found.
I looked at the mushroom, which was obviously Amanita Muscaria, looked at her face, which seems perhaps a bit elated, and eyes which were glassy with dilated pupils and (possibly) yellowing sclera, and immediately expressed my concerns about possible hepatotoxicity. I also inquired as to how long she had been handling the mushroom, to which, after adding the hike and the drive, estimated at least 3 hours.
My concerns we politely noted. I never heard about her needing a liver transplant, so I'm sure it was fine.

I've another story about a friend, high on mushrooms, discovering a mushroom on the cost (here in Oregon), and using it as a sort of divining-rod to find other mushrooms, but I can't say whether those were Amanita or not, as the whole story is second-hand.

Also, the comment in the article about mushrooms being people reminds me instantly of the second episode of Hannibal.
posted by The Legit Republic of Blanketsburg at 6:31 AM on July 10, 2017 [8 favorites]


'Any mushrooms in these parts?’ said Brutha innocently.
St. Ungulant nodded happily.
‘After the annual rains, yes. Red ones with yellow spots. The desert becomes really interesting after the mushroom season.’
‘Full of giant purple singing slugs? Talking pillars of flame? Exploding giraffes? That sort of thing?’ said Brutha carefully.
‘Good heavens, yes,’ said the saint. ‘I don’t know why. I think they’re attracted by the mushrooms.'

--Terry Pratchett
posted by poe at 8:44 AM on July 10, 2017 [19 favorites]


I've always loved the cover picture on David Arora's pocket field guide: All the Rain Promises and More
posted by Mei's lost sandal at 9:10 AM on July 10, 2017 [3 favorites]


My own experiences with low-dose AM tea was a pleasantly relaxed/slightly drunk feeling, but with the added strangeness of loss of balance the next morning in a way that was not like being drunk/hungover. It's not one I would want to take a high dose of, though, as I could feel my thoughts just on the edge of being uncomfortably scrambled/confusing/racing.

This is also the mushroom of the "Jesus was a mushroom" hypothesis.

There are some interesting, though probably unlikely, comparisons here, such as the story of the rising from the dead after three days in the tomb originating in the temporary coma-like death state that a high dose of AM can put you in.
posted by pinothefrog at 9:51 AM on July 10, 2017 [1 favorite]


I've another story about a friend, high on mushrooms, discovering a mushroom on the cost (here in Oregon), and using it as a sort of divining-rod to find other mushrooms, but I can't say whether those were Amanita or not, as the whole story is second-hand.

That's actually a good strategy for finding mushrooms. If you're in the right locale, finding a fruiting amanita muscaria means you ought to start looking for fruiting boletus edulis. In the Sierras, there's an orange cup fungus that often means you're getting close to treading on a morel. Snowplant is also a potential sign of lurking morels.

Sometimes the best way to find mushrooms you're looking for is to instead pay attention to the mushrooms you're not looking for.
posted by mudpuppie at 11:56 AM on July 10, 2017 [3 favorites]


Yes, they're lucky they didn't get more ill than they did, fly agaric can be harsh.

related note: recognized Lawrence Millman's name from his transcriptions of Inuit and Innu folk tales and dark humour: 'A Kayak Full of Ghosts' and 'Wolverine Creates The World'. These books are surreal.
posted by ovvl at 12:07 PM on July 10, 2017


In Siberia, it's not so much don't eat the yellow so much as run! ...lest thee be trampled by every caribou within a quarter mile radius beelining it at top speed to slurp up the magic snowcone.
posted by y2karl at 1:15 PM on July 10, 2017


For a real culinary treat, drink the urine of someone who has eaten the mushrooms.

You usually pay extra for that, Cotton.
posted by Huffy Puffy at 1:15 PM on July 10, 2017 [1 favorite]


This is also the mushroom of the "Jesus was a mushroom" hypothesis.

*reads above quote*

*clenches mouth shut*

*shakes head*

*thinks: "I won't say it. I won't say it. I WON'T say it!"*

*fights smile forming upon lips*

*closes eyes, presses hands to head*

*considers closing MeFi account to avoid making comment*

*sighs*

*resigns self to inevitable fate, to unavoidable capitulation*

*watches self, as if in a dream, reach for phone to comment in thread*

Was it because he's a FUN GUY?! HA HA HA HAHAH HAHAHA HAH HAAA!!!!!!

*wonders if mods will ban self for worst/most obvious dad joke of 2017, possibly of all MeFi history*
posted by the quidnunc kid at 2:05 PM on July 10, 2017 [11 favorites]


My concerns we politely noted. I never heard about her needing a liver transplant, so I'm sure it was fine.

Fortunately I don't think A. muscaria contain amatoxins.
posted by atoxyl at 4:11 PM on July 10, 2017 [2 favorites]


Obviously Jesus rose from the tomb because there wasn't mushroom in there.
posted by Miss Otis' Egrets at 4:48 PM on July 10, 2017 [2 favorites]


A blog post on eating Amanita muscaria with David Arora. Interestingly, it links to a different copy of the same story linked in this post, from ten years ago.
posted by exogenous at 9:01 AM on July 11, 2017


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