"Purrieu," "ptlee-bl," and other vital feline vocabulary words

August 9, 2017 7:10 PM

"Cases have been given of… cats and dogs living together, in the same kennel, of which there have been innumerable instances." In 1895, Marvin R. Clark self-published a 150-page pamphlet, Pussy and Her Language, about how (and why) to talk to your cat. Atlas Obscura's Cara Giaimo helpfully highlights each chapter of the dense text.
posted by Room 641-A (16 comments total)

I thought the guy was a nutter until I got to this: "Their word 'yow' means extermination from the face of the earth."

Yeah, I'd say that nailed it.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:53 PM on August 9, 2017 [2 favorites]

Oh dear, EmpressCallipygos, that put Cogrove right off her feed!
posted by janey47 at 8:00 PM on August 9, 2017

Cats have language, some of it quite salty. Miss Pie had an entire lexicon of profanity for her nemesis, Norma, though the most eloquent expression of her disdain was when she would let a haughty *pff* from one of her whisker-cheeks.
posted by louche mustachio at 8:18 PM on August 9, 2017 [1 favorite]

The first time she had to stay with Norma, she caught me alone in the bathroom and dressed me down for about fifteen minutes with an extensive list of grievances. Lectured me. I got TOLD.

The only other thing I heard was howls of laughter from the other room. "So Pie, how do you REALLY feel?"
posted by louche mustachio at 8:22 PM on August 9, 2017 [6 favorites]

In our house, everything is discussed, debated, or otherwise related to us by our little soldier. "I'm outside the window! I'm coming in the window! I'm in the bedroom! Hello! Is there biscuits? Can we check if there's biscuits? We're going down the hall to check if there's biscuits! Are you coming down the hall to check if there's biscuits? What if there isn't biscuits?..." and so on.

All day.

There's some blessed relief between the hours of midnight and 4:30 am, but otherwise it is slowly wearing on our sanity. (Except he's stupid cute and we love him)
posted by prismatic7 at 8:57 PM on August 9, 2017 [9 favorites]

Have not skimmed links yet, but oh, I could write chapters of updates just on the (stuffed) Mouse Yowl as performed by current cat. Indeed, I describe it as the sound you'd make if you were told the world is ending in five minutes.

she ... dressed me down for about fifteen minutes with an extensive list of grievances. Lectured me.

Oh, I know the Lecture. Once a former cat of the house was left mostly alone for a few days (necessary trip) in a new apartment we'd just moved to. Upon my return, that orange and white half-Siamese followed me around for 10 minutes: "Row row rowrowrow, rowrowrow rowrowrow..."
posted by NorthernLite at 9:24 PM on August 9, 2017 [3 favorites]

We've had cats that meow-drank. Pretty funny. Not as much as listening to a cow moo-drink, since moos already sound dummer than meows. Pretty close though.
posted by metagnathous at 3:30 AM on August 10, 2017

Count me in as the companion of a kitty who definitely speaks her own language. She has learned that humans communicate by looking you in the eye and making seemingly random noises, so if she has a little cat feeling it's only her duty to do the same.

Last night I had a friend over, a friend who doubles as her favorite prey. She began to sweet talk him in the most high-pitched series of mews I've ever heard her produce while laying with her belly exposed. "Aren't I cute? Don't humans love high-pitched noises? Doesn't it make me sound innocent and not at all like I'm plotting a murder?"
posted by tofu_crouton at 5:43 AM on August 10, 2017 [4 favorites]

Thanks for posting this it's really interesting. I do think the author of the article is underestimating how much of the pamphlet is tongue in cheek.

Marvin R. Clark was a New York newspaper editor and a member of the Thirteen Club. The Thirteen Club was a men's club that met annually to flaunt superstitions (though really it sounds like they just wanted an excuse to have superstition theme parties). But their annual report is the same sort of half joking discussion of doing the opposite of what society expects.
posted by interplanetjanet at 6:03 AM on August 10, 2017 [1 favorite]

I was hoping this might be a real description of cat communication (which is mostly silent body language). Cats do communicate, but their vocalisations are just a small part - and maybe learned from us (cats vocalise more around people).
posted by jb at 6:11 AM on August 10, 2017

I was hoping this might be a real description of cat communication (which is mostly silent body language).

This previous FPP lead me to this scientific description of cat vocalizations that might be of interest to you. I personally feel like my cat has a lot more reasons for vocalization than described, however.
posted by tofu_crouton at 6:33 AM on August 10, 2017 [1 favorite]

My Zach had a series of vocalizations when he was old, that happened only when I caught him somewhere he shouldn't be and shooed him out of a room. He'd comply, but then park himself just outside in the door in the hallway and start protesting:

"muuhhhh-ROW!
muuhhhh-ROW!
muuhhhh-ROW!
muuhhhh-ROW!
muuhhhh-ROW!
muuhhhh-ROW!
muuhhhh-ROW!...."

Like he was a chanting in protest or something. After a while I'd finally get sick of it and snap "Knock it off!" And then after a beat, there would be one last sulky little "........mruw......." like "fine, be that way...." and then silence.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:39 AM on August 10, 2017 [8 favorites]

Sir Isaac Newton may have used his cats to study the laws of physics

Cats don't abide by the laws of nature.
posted by radwolf76 at 7:24 AM on August 10, 2017

Real 'wrath of God' stuff.
posted by stevil at 7:36 AM on August 10, 2017

My cats only meow when they get themselves locked in a bedroom or closet.

You will never convince me though that they do not understand English (though with highly selective hearing).
posted by tivalasvegas at 9:02 AM on August 10, 2017

Hello! Is there biscuits? Can we check if there's biscuits? We're going down the hall to check if there's biscuits! Are you coming down the hall to check if there's biscuits? What if there isn't biscuits?

Coming in late to say that I have had this little monologue as a rather adorable earworm since I read it a few days ago.

(I get "Hello and where is my dinner?" meows from my cat, but otherwise she's more of a headbutts-and-licks communicator.)
posted by une_heure_pleine at 7:05 AM on August 15, 2017 [1 favorite]