Another year, another phone
September 12, 2017 10:03 AM   Subscribe

 
I miss Steve.
posted by macrael at 10:04 AM on September 12 [9 favorites]


excellent use of "capitalism" tag
posted by numaner at 10:07 AM on September 12 [14 favorites]


Unless they're bringing the headphone jack back or including bluetooth earbuds they can pry my 6S out of my cold dead hands. Especially for the rumored $999 price of the X, that better include fancy wireless earbuds.
posted by T.D. Strange at 10:07 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


iPhone X? Did VII VIII IX?
posted by dirigibleman at 10:09 AM on September 12 [117 favorites]


Especially for the rumored $999 price of the X, that better include fancy wireless earbuds.

If its got wireless and more space than a Nomad, I'm in!
posted by mazola at 10:12 AM on September 12 [12 favorites]


iPhone X, huh? So like OS X can we assume that we'll be given a POSIX compliant operating system with standard Unix facilities available from the command line interface?

Ha ha, just kidding. Things don't get better, they get worse! 😂
posted by leotrotsky at 10:13 AM on September 12 [16 favorites]


Calling stores “town squares” reminds me of the gentrified herbal tea brand that calls its pyramidal silk teabags “tea temples” or something similarly ridiculous.
posted by acb at 10:14 AM on September 12 [20 favorites]


I'm still using a seemingly indestructible iPhone 5 (knocks on wood). As of today, when iOS 11 comes out, I can no longer upgrade the OS. From what I've read so far, the iPhone X is supposedly introducing new biometric features including facial recognition to unlock. This is pretty much the last thing I'd want on my phone. For me, privacy and security is primary. Now looking for an alternative, as I'm sure others are as well.
posted by standardasparagus at 10:14 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


iPhone X? Did VII VIII IX?

Many machines on Ix. New machines.
posted by zombieflanders at 10:14 AM on September 12 [46 favorites]


Especially for the rumored $999 price of the X, that better include fancy wireless earbuds.

At that price it better beam the sound directly into my brain.
posted by It's Never Lurgi at 10:15 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


Many machines on Ix. New machines.

Better than those on Richese.
posted by Artw at 10:18 AM on September 12 [12 favorites]


Is this like Jason X? Can we look forward to iPhone Takes Manhattan? iPhone in Space?
posted by Kafkaesque at 10:18 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


Town Square? Genius Grove?
posted by gauche at 10:19 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


The jack off portion of the presentation just seems especially long winded and tone deaf this year for some reason.
posted by Artw at 10:20 AM on September 12 [14 favorites]


I find it disturbing how attendees mindlessly applause when Cook introduces a product or an update, not knowing what is to come
posted by standardasparagus at 10:20 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


standardasparagus: "Now looking for an alternative"

My Microsoft Windows Phone is my favorite so far. I mean, I know I'm being monitored and all that, and there are very few apps available, but hey the battery lasts a whole day, the phone part works extremely well & I can read my email jes' fine. Also, it cost $50 refurbished off Ebay.
posted by chavenet at 10:21 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


Town squares, groves, and forums - honestly, the fact that Apple drinks its koolaid so hard that it gets lightheaded and hallucinates its own largess would not bother me so much except I fucking know three years from now some fanperson in my own organization is going to propose our own lemon grove for genius and I am going to end up with a murder charge.

Please consider contributing to my crowdfunded bail, request arriving momentarily.
posted by notorious medium at 10:21 AM on September 12 [17 favorites]


Remember when our phones were 7.1mm thick and had a headphone jack? We lived like animals!
posted by thelonius at 10:22 AM on September 12 [33 favorites]


I hope they talk about the iPhone. :(
posted by mazola at 10:23 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


I’m trying to think of a brand I care deeply enough about to write a letter too, and it’s mostly a matter of narrowing down which processed cheese snack.
BRIAN BARRETT 09-12-2017 | 01:22:20 from Wired
posted by standardasparagus at 10:24 AM on September 12 [11 favorites]


notorious medium: I probably won't be able to contribute cash to the bail fund, but I'll gladly alibi you for such a worthy cause.
posted by easily confused at 10:25 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


I probably shouldn't have read the post about rich people before this event.
posted by Artw at 10:25 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


My browser, Chrome, does not support live streaming of the event.
This does not bode well for my continued interest in their products.
posted by mfu at 10:25 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


If I buy a phone for $1,000 it better write me some letters.
posted by chavenet at 10:26 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


Sorry, not in the mood for sitting in the new Crystal Cathedral and hearing a familiar recitation of the liturgy for the faithful. Especially not at those prices...
posted by jim in austin at 10:27 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


Speaking as someone with atrial fibrillation the heart study thing is kinda interesting.
posted by aramaic at 10:27 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


From The Verge cvoverage: "Great, Apple Watch now detects Trump tweeting."
posted by Artw at 10:28 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


The video of Apple Watch users reading their compliments of the product was expertly edited, but the segment with the guy trapped in his overturned car calmly reading his note about his beloved watch, was… disconcerting.
posted by Bora Horza Gobuchul at 10:28 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


I used to work at an Apple Store in San Diego. It was an awesome experience, and many years later, I was able to work side by side with Apple
Engineers and designers to help build the first Apple Watch. To have come from retail to that was beyond my wildest dreams. I get that there are legitimate and very serious reasons to hate on Apple. I share a lot of your frustrations and have never seen the company in a 100% positive way. But for the love of god, for some of us, these events that Apple hosts are really fucking positive and wonderful in equally legitimate ways. Please let those of us who feel that way enjoy that.
posted by Hermione Granger at 10:29 AM on September 12 [52 favorites]


“This has been our vision from the very beginning,” Jeff says. You can leave your phone when you go to the beach, you can run without it, you can receive calls and connect your same number. - Wired live-blog

...but also buy our $1000 phone!
posted by notorious medium at 10:29 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


If you want a live stream with less editorializing, try Mac Rumors. Of course, the need for snark is strong in this thread, so it might not be for everyone.
posted by TedW at 10:29 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


The Red Sox are the only ones excited about Apple Watch features. Boom!
posted by T.D. Strange at 10:30 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Well, how else do we signal nerd-virtue?
posted by aramaic at 10:30 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


I wonder if the multi-SIM phone number sharing works at the phone network level, or if it's a hack at the iMessage/FaceTime level of the stack. If the latter, it may be a hint to dump those loser friends who are holding you back by sticking with Android/WinMo/their old Nokia.
posted by acb at 10:32 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


From The Verge cvoverage: "Great, Apple Watch now detects Trump tweeting."

Despite the constant negative press cvoverage
posted by Faint of Butt at 10:33 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


This is the worst genre of anything and I can't stop watching. It's like a tent revival meeting for singularitarians
posted by theodolite at 10:33 AM on September 12 [38 favorites]


I don't even understand that comment but I'll favourite it.
posted by mazola at 10:35 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


If there's anything more 2017 than making an employee on a paddle board in the middle of a lake answer your conference call, I don't know what it is.
posted by notorious medium at 10:36 AM on September 12 [41 favorites]


I don't use a lot of the features on my current Apple Watch because I feel silly talking to my watch (despite growing up reading Dick Tracy every Sunday). But I already want the new one. Yes, I am brainwashed too easily.
posted by TedW at 10:37 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


The jack off portion of the presentation just seems especially long winded and tone deaf this year for some reason.

They're just building up to the jack back on portion of the presentation.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:38 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


Watching this thing out of curiosity. When the crowd applauds, listen closely. I'm pretty sure the applause is being 'sweetened' with pre-recorded voices. I get that this is Apple's propaganda in its purest, most polished form, but you'd think they could've used some newer, less obvious tracks-- I'm hearing canned studio audience whoops and cheers that have been around since at least the mid-to-late 80s, mostly from talk shows. I keep expecting Oprah to walk out from the wings and start throwing phones everywhere.
posted by KHAAAN! at 10:38 AM on September 12 [15 favorites]


The Bloomberg talking heads think that the *unteathered* phone is uge, hugely uge!

You can use it on a surfboard In The Middle of the ocean! Freedom to go anywhere.

Well unless it falls off and is on the bottom of the ocean, still buzzing for 18 hours.
posted by sammyo at 10:39 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I'm a pretty dedicated Apple consumer (ugh), but jeezum crow, the gross wankery of this event is really astounding. It's like they found a stray Silicon Valley script and just went with it.
posted by uncleozzy at 10:40 AM on September 12 [12 favorites]


Two things: one, the new Apple watch has cellular capability and is waterproof, as evidenced by COO Jeff Williams's in-presentation call to an Apple employee currently out paddle boarding on the water. And two, Williams mentioned that the new watch is the same size as the previous iteration, and despite the new features is not the "size of a home arrest monitor". I bring these two points together for they reveal a rather remarkable unconscious slip-up: while not the size of a home arrest monitor, they function is potentially the same as far as an employer may be concerned. With this watch, you are to be available all all times. Even if you are out paddle boarding, you must still be able to receive a call. Always on call, always present, never away.
posted by standardasparagus at 10:41 AM on September 12 [55 favorites]


When does Emma Watson come out and confront Tom Hanks about his unethical behaviour?
posted by Fizz at 10:41 AM on September 12 [16 favorites]


The headphone jack off portion of the presentation just seems especially long winded and tone deaf this year for some reason.

FTFY
posted by Melismata at 10:41 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I love how snarky the Wired livefeed is.
OK onto Apple TV, which “has changed the way we experience television.” Whatever you say, Cookie.
...
Last year it was the #2 watch in the world, now it’s #1. Suck it Rolex.
...
Tim Cook claims over 9,000 trees on campus, which David will be factchecking right after the event.
BRIAN BARRETT

I’ve counted seven so far. Progress.
DAVID PIERCE
posted by filthy light thief at 10:42 AM on September 12 [18 favorites]


If you run over on your "unlimited" LTE data plan, checking the time on your cellular Apple Watch will start costing you 15$ per extra gigabye.
posted by T.D. Strange at 10:43 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


4K HDR screensavers [mild applause]
posted by standardasparagus at 10:44 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


standardasparagus: "4K HDR screensavers [mild applause]"

Well that's a game-changer.
posted by octothorpe at 10:45 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Well unless it falls off and is on the bottom of the ocean, still buzzing for 18 hours.


Was that barracuda wearing a watch?
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 10:46 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


gigabye

I like it. I'm going to start using that.
posted by Melismata at 10:46 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Apple TV terms, defined: Dolby Vision is better than HDR (High Dynamic Range) imagery because Dolby Vision-capable feeds include dynamic metadata, so you get scene-by-scene image quality data for your device to interpret.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:47 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


4K, smorek, I'm more impressed that this livestream is playing for me, based on past Apple Events in previous years.
posted by Fizz at 10:47 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


MeFi's own cstross is tweeting about the presentation.
posted by Ber at 10:48 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I don't even understand that comment but I'll favourite it.

He means it's an extravaganza for extropians
posted by thelonius at 10:48 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


$999? For a phone?!? I feel like this is what's wrong with the world today. Another huge wedge between the haves and have-nots, more disparity, more greed, more jealousy.

I remember, about ten years ago, my landline was $10/month on a low-income plan and that was a stretch for me during lean times. How is it possible that a $1000 pocket device has/will become a necessity?

(/rant and stepping off of old-lady luddite soapbox, but, really...)
posted by stillmoving at 10:49 AM on September 12 [16 favorites]


It's not a phone. It's a lifestyle.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:50 AM on September 12 [14 favorites]


Siri, where can I find a job that will let me pay off all this crippling debt I've incurred by buying a 4K HD TV, iPhone 8 and Apple Watch Series 3?
posted by Fizz at 10:50 AM on September 12 [18 favorites]


The thing about the $1k iPhone is that it includes features that will become more wide-spread, bringing down its cost and the cost for those features in other phones.

Except I don't want facial recognition in my phone, thankyouverymuch.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:51 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


$1000 for the iPhone X or $100 for a new iPhone 5? With 1080p, hidef, HD, fancy things throttled on LTE services I'm not sure what a new model does anymore.

So... what's actually next? Because smart watches are about as fascinating as pagers while fulfilling similar roles and we've already seen that a smartphone can do web, documents, google maps, etc etc.

Is there actually a better way of doing what a smart phone does or is it a sort of tech-evolutionary dead-ender at this point?
posted by Slackermagee at 10:52 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


You're looking for the new iNdenture app, Fizz. It will solve all of your problems. Now available from the company store.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:52 AM on September 12 [14 favorites]


" With this watch, you are to be available all all times. Even if you are out paddle boarding, you must still be able to receive a call"

You know you don't have to answer, right?
posted by uberchet at 10:53 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


$999? For a phone?!?

I really don't want a fragile, easily lost, easily stolen gadget, that I have to carry around at all times, to be that expensive.
posted by thelonius at 10:53 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


You know you don't have to answer, right?

Tell that to my boss who is monitoring my pulse rate and knows from the sudden spike that I received the call.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:56 AM on September 12 [68 favorites]


Heck, my new work phone has some proximity sensor feature that is somewhere between neat and super annoying, usually leaning towards the latter. My own phone is an iPhone 5c, which I got for free from Verizon, in a rare offer from them. Now, I pay full market price for a device over 24 months, plus my monthly service charges. I remember when you could upgrade and still get a free or reduced-price phone, but I guess that is a thing of the past.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:56 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


I wonder whether there are any plans to combine the Apple Watch's heart rate monitor with the Apple TV's news headline display.
posted by acb at 10:56 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


8 is 1 more than 7!! HUGE!!!
posted by Fizz at 10:58 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


You know you don't have to answer, right?

Yes, ideally. But it's also a question of expectations in light of diminishing workers' rights, and increasingly precarious employment.
posted by standardasparagus at 10:58 AM on September 12 [11 favorites]


Ok Phil keep it real
posted by mazola at 10:59 AM on September 12


Pepsi Blue Apple White
posted by MikeKD at 10:59 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


"Tell that to my boss who is monitoring my pulse rate and knows from the sudden spike that I received the call."

Maybe you need a different boss.
posted by uberchet at 10:59 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


They should have collaborated with Disney and got the Moana crab to do its song here.
posted by Artw at 10:59 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


It's Raining Florence Henderson: You're looking for the new iNdenture app, Fizz. It will solve all of your problems. Now available from the company store.

Apple calls their stores “town squares” now, which to me says it’s time to grab a skateboard and loiter. Stores with trees = The Genius Grove. Yes, that’s really what they’re calling it. [Two lines stolen from the Wired live blogging]

And D.C.’s Carnegie Library will become a new Apple store, I mean "town square."
posted by filthy light thief at 11:00 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


Maybe you need a different boss.

It's 2017. What if Black Mirror, but everyone.
posted by Artw at 11:00 AM on September 12 [55 favorites]


My wife needs a new phone -- she is constitutionally incapable of managing the (woefully inadequate) storage on her 16GB phone and can only manage to take three photos at a time before running out of space -- and I'm glad there's an iPhone 8 instead of just the $1k+ monstrosity, at least.

Although yes, I will be totes jelly.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:01 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Have they developed a screen that doesn't shatter when you look at it sideways?
posted by octothorpe at 11:01 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


And now, for the first time, iPhone comes with citizenship in Mr. Lee's Greater Hong Kong!
posted by goHermGO at 11:02 AM on September 12 [26 favorites]


lemme know when they get rid of those fucking airpods. God that's a stupid design.
posted by aspersioncast at 11:02 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Favorited so effing hard octothorpe!!
posted by Melismata at 11:03 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Have they developed a screen that doesn't shatter when you look at it sideways?

$5 tempered-glass screen protectors have saved me many hundreds of dollars in repair/replacement fees.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 11:03 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


I just got a new phone. I made good on my year-old plan to buy a 6S at what I figured was the last possible moment, so I preserve the ability to use good headphones without carrying around a stupid adapter.

I got 3 years out of my 6. I figure I'll get 2 or 3 out of the 6S before I have to migrate again. The 6S is a great phone -- you get Apple Pay, a really solid camera, plenty of storage, etc.
posted by uberchet at 11:03 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


I'm going to note in a non-snarky way just how amazing smartphone cameras are tight now.
posted by Artw at 11:09 AM on September 12 [14 favorites]


Have they developed a screen that doesn't shatter when you look at it sideways?

I drop my iPhone all the damn time, often on stone/concrete, and I have yet to so much as crack the glass. I don't have some fancy case either, just a purely for looks one I got off Society6. I don't think I even have a screen protector on right now, I'm pretty sure I took it off back when I first got it because it was introducing a weird lag in using the touch screen. Is everyone else dropping their phones screen side down onto concrete from great heights or am I just weirdly lucky?
posted by yasaman at 11:10 AM on September 12 [9 favorites]


Artw, in the same non-snarky way, I would like to note that the thing I'm most excited about is the electronic sim they've placed in the Apple Watch. I work for a cellular company and provide technical support. People who struggle with inserting a sim card into a new phone is one of our top call-drivers. I would like this to become standard across the industry.
posted by Fizz at 11:12 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Apparently gorilla-arm AR is the wave of the future. I am uncertain of this.

/wonders how far away socially acceptable Google Apple Glass is.
posted by Artw at 11:12 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Not for nothing, but in 10 years of iPhones I've broken one screen, plus shattering the back of whichever model had a glass back.

I take care of my stuff, but I'm not super paranoid or anything. I don't use an insanely fault tolerant case or anything.
posted by uberchet at 11:12 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I don't know why people are complaining about Apple pimping the products they have been working on and hope to sell in a presentation organized by Apple for the express purpose of pimping their products. What did you expect?
posted by AndrewStephens at 11:12 AM on September 12 [23 favorites]


Weirdly lucky, yasaman. I held mine a little tighter than usual while walking over a steel grate, and it cracked.
posted by Melismata at 11:13 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


ah the gaming demo, or as i like to call it, "the pee break."
posted by entropicamericana at 11:13 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


My boss's iPhone screen cracks every time my heart rate goes over 100 beats per minute.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:13 AM on September 12 [12 favorites]


My boss's iPhone screen cracks every time my heart rate goes over 100 beats per minute.

For what you and your boss are doing, she should put down her iPhone.
posted by The Bellman at 11:15 AM on September 12 [12 favorites]


I don't know why people are complaining about Apple pimping the products they have been working on and hope to sell in a presentation organized by Apple for the express purpose of pimping their products. What did you expect?

To complain?
posted by thelonius at 11:15 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


I drop mine so often I'm on my 3rd otterbox commuter case for my 6S after going through at least 3 more when I had a 5, screen hasn't broken yet.
posted by T.D. Strange at 11:15 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


It's the great cycle. They are IBM Microsoft now.
posted by Artw at 11:16 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Interesting to see that, while the iPhone 8 has wireless charging and Bluetooth headphones, it still has a Lightning port. Though I wonder if next year's iPhone 9 will continue to have one.
posted by acb at 11:17 AM on September 12


What did you expect?

I'm not even here to complain--I'm here to read the entertaining complaints of others.
posted by sandettie light vessel automatic at 11:18 AM on September 12 [25 favorites]


Why is it a "so-called" keynote? Seems like it literally is a keynote.
posted by Chrysostom at 11:19 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Looks like an iPhone. Woo.
posted by leotrotsky at 11:20 AM on September 12


From the Wired liveblog: Also this means, for the first time, you officially never need a cord for your iPhone.

This would be great if only Wireless Sync literally ever worked. Does it work on a regular basis for anyone? I get that it won't work with spotty wifi, but even when I have a very fast wireless connection, it just doesn't sync. I'm still plugging the damn thing into my macbook, like a wired animal.
posted by yasaman at 11:20 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


Why is it a "so-called" keynote? Seems like it literally is a keynote.

It's a cryptokeynote.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:20 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Discussing the price in UK pounds would likely cause (well monitored) heart attacks.
posted by Artw at 11:20 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


Looks like an iPhone. Woo.

But the Retina Display is... super!
posted by bondcliff at 11:21 AM on September 12


11:19 am Schiller: "There were a lot of people at Apple that didn't get much sleep last night preparing for this."

Well, then you can't plan for shit and you're kind of an asshole, Phil.
posted by leotrotsky at 11:21 AM on September 12 [28 favorites]


This is timely, but I'm probably going to drop about $180 on a used iPhone SE.

Daughter shattered her 5s screen. I ordered a DIY replacement, but it wasn't until after I had disassembled her phone I realized I ordered a replacement for a 5 and not a 5s. Once the 5s screen came in, I fucked up transferring over the home button/camera/ear speaker, so her phone is toast.

Swappa has a few used iPhone SE's going for $180 and up, and I think that will be adequate for what she needs. I have a 6s+ that I really like (although I now regret not getting the 6s as this thing doesn't ride well in a pocket), and my wife's 7 that she just got seems like a great device (even if you can't charge and use the headphone port simultaneously, my headphones are bluetooth).

We're heavily invested in the Apple environment and I don't see us transitioning anytime soon, but I think devices have also gotten to the point where we can wait a good year before upgrading. I wish Apple allowed for external storage (I went from 16GB to 128GB with my last upgrade and it's been wonderful to dump stuff to the phone and not worry about filling up storage). Now that I use Spotify more than I use my personal music library, that's less of an issue. It is nice to load up with Netflix/Amazon Video downloads for a flight though.

Still waiting for a handy dandy chart showing a comparison of features accross 6s/7/8/X. The phone does 90% of what I'd like it to do, and I think most limitations I encounter are on the software (damn I'd love to download a torrent fille) vs hardware (damn I'd love to charge wirelessly).
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 11:21 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


Well, there's only one question left: will it blend?
posted by T.D. Strange at 11:21 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


Looks like an iPhone

Kinda looks like an Android.
posted by Artw at 11:22 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Lets not kid ourselves - Face ID only exists so we finally have a reason to get Cage and Travolta back on the set for Face Off 2.
posted by notorious medium at 11:27 AM on September 12 [9 favorites]


That explains the iDoves feature.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:27 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


Yep, facial ID to unlock. So there goes your 4th amendment rights during every traffic stop. Gotta wonder how hard the NSA pushed Apple for this after losing a couple encryption cases.
posted by T.D. Strange at 11:28 AM on September 12 [20 favorites]


This is timely, but I'm probably going to drop about $180 on a used iPhone SE.

Since its the only Apple phone now with a headphone jack, my next phone will either be another SE with a spec bump, or Android. I do find it amusing that Gruber glibly dimissed people who consider no headphone jack a dealbreaker, but then on his blog just about threw a shoe over the prospective lack of a home button.
posted by tclark at 11:28 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


*Crosses fingers for iPod Touch 4.1X, which will be just like my iPodTouch 4.1, only it won't freeze/crash on every site except for MeFi & sometimes Gmail and maybe there's a decent camera*
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:28 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


How about if the thief severs your head and carries it off with them. Is there a protection against that?
posted by Grangousier at 11:29 AM on September 12 [15 favorites]


I mean against unlocking the phone. I wouldn't expect it to protect against decapitation. That's for the iPhone X Plus next year.
posted by Grangousier at 11:30 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Yep, facial ID to unlock. So there goes your 4th amendment rights during every traffic stop. Gotta wonder how hard the NSA pushed Apple for this after losing a couple encryption cases.

Cut off your nose to spite the law.
posted by notorious medium at 11:30 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


As of about a year or two ago, I stopped wanting anything new w.r.t. my iPhone (6S).

I have stripped apps to bare minimum and use basically text, slack, twitter, email, safari (in that order) and not much else. I love my phone. Don't want anything new - I'll be sticking with my 6S (PEAK PHONE!) for as long as possible.
posted by parki at 11:31 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


From the Wired liveblog: You have to look at it for it to work. Remember this when you get arrested.

So, someone could force you to look at it, but someone can force you to unlock with your fingerprint for TouchID too.
posted by yasaman at 11:31 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


How about if the thief severs your head and carries it off with them. Is there a protection against that?

Has society learned NOTHING from Quake 2?!?
posted by codacorolla at 11:31 AM on September 12 [6 favorites]


Oh, and I use my headphone jack. A lot.
posted by parki at 11:31 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


"Since its the only Apple phone now with a headphone jack"

The 6, 6s and 6+ have headphone jacks. I'm looking at them right now on my work desk.
posted by FritoKAL at 11:31 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


So it's got facial recognition unlocking only seven years after Android? That's some innovatin'.
posted by octothorpe at 11:32 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


Re: 4th amendment issues, as with TouchID, you can almost certainly turn it off and force the entry of a passcode. Apple's paying attention to these issues, probably more than anybody else.
posted by uberchet at 11:32 AM on September 12 [16 favorites]


How about if the thief severs your head and carries it off with them. Is there a protection against that?

The iCollar 1.x. Don't worry, the explosive charge is there for your protection.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:32 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


Have we all forgotten iOS 11 has that "cop mode" function that specifically locks them out?
posted by aramaic at 11:32 AM on September 12 [9 favorites]


That's some terrible animation there on those emojis. Horrifying
posted by dng at 11:33 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


I recall that Apple previously stressed that the information associated with TouchID is stored locally on the phone, and not sent to Apple or any cloud. Yet to hear of this privacy feature with this new Face ID.
posted by standardasparagus at 11:33 AM on September 12


face id off to an auspicious start on the demo
posted by entropicamericana at 11:33 AM on September 12


Cook did just refer to the passcode, if they're leaving the passcode option on, that's much better. A passcode cannot be legally compelled, unlike fingerprints or presumably your face.
posted by T.D. Strange at 11:34 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


Tbh I'm 100% willing to trade my privacy and rights for the ability to be a wisecracking animated panda
posted by theodolite at 11:34 AM on September 12 [8 favorites]


Yet to hear of this privacy feature with this new Face ID.

He said it's stored locally in the same way, with the secure enclave chip.
posted by T.D. Strange at 11:34 AM on September 12 [8 favorites]


They specifically mentioned that it stays on-device.
posted by aramaic at 11:34 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


He said it's stored locally in the same way, with the secure enclave chip.

Cheers, must've dozed off…
posted by standardasparagus at 11:35 AM on September 12


The 6, 6s and 6+ have headphone jacks. I'm looking at them right now on my work desk.

My understanding, which may be mistaken, is that the 6/6s are being discontinued, and only the 7/8/X/SEs will still be manufactured and in stores.
posted by tclark at 11:35 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


iPhone X UI seems to be entirely predicated on the use of gestural stuff I find irritating and turn off elsewhere.
posted by Artw at 11:35 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


A passcode cannot be legally compelled, unlike fingerprints or presumably your face.

There are a number of cases that are before the courts now that until now have held up as legal.

Not saying you might not be ultimately proven correct, but right now you can be held for multiple years for not revealing a passcode.
posted by bonehead at 11:39 AM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I'm interested to see how they deal with pre-existing apps that have some kind of function you access by swiping up from the bottom of the screen.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 11:39 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


It's Apple, so by mocking and insulting the developers of those apps until they admit they were wrong and change.
posted by Artw at 11:41 AM on September 12 [12 favorites]


One white, grey haired man in hip jeans sending Snaps onstage to another white, grey haired man while millions watch in awe. Democracy may be dead and half the country might be underwater, but the teenage angst punk rock and rap this will fuel for the next decade is going to be lit.
posted by notorious medium at 11:42 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


1. FaceID doesn't sound as nice as Windows Hello, but it's the same thing, right? Let's hope it does well for people who aren't white...

2. Man, fuck Google. I really went all in on the Qi Wireless thing they had before they dropped in the 5X/6P and the Pixel. I'm glad Apple's picking it up, so my iPhone will benefit from the ecosystem I bought into, but I'm really hoping the Pixel 2 brings it back. Which it probably won't.
posted by anem0ne at 11:43 AM on September 12


More on "forgetting" passcodes leading to jail time. Francis Rawls is now two years in jail.
posted by bonehead at 11:44 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]


right now you can be held for multiple years for not revealing a passcode

Right, I was over simplifying. But judicial contempt for refusing to give up the passcode is much different and extreme than the cop on scene holding the phone up to your face or finger and getting everything.
posted by T.D. Strange at 11:44 AM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Remember the Apple "1984" Big Brother commercial? This is totally just like that. Except they've swapped roles.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:47 AM on September 12 [17 favorites]


Does it work on a regular basis for anyone?

Yeah. I'm not going to say that it's amazingly reliable, or amazingly fast. But it's OK for me these days.
posted by wotsac at 11:47 AM on September 12


I really don't get the apparently universal appeal of wireless charging. I mean, why?
posted by uberchet at 11:48 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


But for the love of god, for some of us, these events that Apple hosts are really fucking positive and wonderful in equally legitimate ways. Please let those of us who feel that way enjoy that.

I appreciate your feelings of accomplishment, but this thread probably isn't for you. Asking people to not criticize the world's richest electronics manufacturer is probably a non starter and you'd have better luck trying to stay dry by pissing up wind in a hurricane.

Also... maybe drink less of the kool-aid. Apple's house brand is known to be an exceptionally potent and addictive hallucinogen.
posted by loquacious at 11:48 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


I really don't get the apparently universal appeal of wireless charging. I mean, why?

Convenience, mayhap?
posted by slater at 11:51 AM on September 12 [3 favorites]


How hard is it to plug in? I mean, I don't have an issue with it at all. Never have. Plus, a charging pad is likely to be bulkier and harder to travel with than a Lightning cable.
posted by uberchet at 11:53 AM on September 12 [7 favorites]




Because cords suck. They do, Apple is right about that. I'm not sure their solution is a good one, but a world without the need for wires would be wonderful.
posted by Sangermaine at 11:53 AM on September 12 [5 favorites]


I've been watching some of this (on my £50 Amazon Tablet which has Skype, social media, email, a browser and a bunch of other stuff) and it's making me feel old and confused about the modern world.
posted by Wordshore at 11:53 AM on September 12


I really don't get the apparently universal appeal of wireless charging. I mean, why?

A couple of reasons - one, you can simultaneously charge devices on the same pad and two, because cord ends and ports tend to be points of failure on many devices.
posted by notorious medium at 11:54 AM on September 12 [4 favorites]


"Because cords suck."

You still have a cord. There's just a more complicated and fiddly thing on the end of it, and a subsystem on the phone to support contact charging instead of just using the port (which it also still has).
posted by uberchet at 11:55 AM on September 12 [10 favorites]


Because cords suck.

Apple cords suck. I've had dental floss that lasted longer than Apple cables.
posted by peeedro at 11:55 AM on September 12 [10 favorites]


Also... maybe drink less of the kool-aid. Apple's house brand is known to be an exceptionally potent and addictive hallucinogen.

This is the point where I start to agree with Hermione. Calling Apple's brand a cult is on the verge of becoming as much of a cult as it is. Come on, seriously. I own a MBP. I do not own an iPhone anymore because I don't like them, I don't like the experience of using them, I don't like how closed-off they are, I have tons of problems with that and I roll my eyes every time they release a new one and keep buying my Nexus devices. But lots of people like using them and they get excited about there being new ones and... great! It's not for me but it doesn't have to be for me. I can talk factually about the things I don't like about the iPhone without this ridiculous hyperbole of you needing to be on drugs to appreciate it.

Anyway! I like the appeal of convenience in charging, but wireless charging is a thing that was... already a thing once? I don't understand why it didn't work last time and why it's novel and going to be useful this time. You know what was actually a charging innovation for me? The fact that my MBP and my Nexus 6P phone can now share a charger when I'm at work. But I'll be happy when wireless charging is really a thing, I'm just dubious since the last iteration didn't work out.
posted by Sequence at 11:55 AM on September 12 [11 favorites]


Apple cords suck. I've had dental floss that lasted longer than Apple cables.
I have, in 10 years, only had one Apple cord fail. And I travel. I'm not sure what other folks are doing, but holy hell it's never come up at our house.
posted by uberchet at 11:58 AM on September 12 [15 favorites]


I ran a pair of Apple earbuds through the wash, and they got pretty gnarly and lost some of the insulation, but somehow they still worked.

I did abandon my iPhone 5s earlier than planned, though, after I broke the screen, got it fixed (by a teenager, of course), then dropped it in the toilet (still worked!), and wound up with so much crud in the camera that every photo looked like it was shot underwater.
posted by uncleozzy at 12:01 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


because cord ends and ports tend to be points of failure on many devices.

It's also a step towards removing the lightning port entirely. But I hope they don't remove it until they can actually make the phone waterproof. Not water resistant, but waterproof to the point it's not an instant deal breaker with your AppleCare. That would probably be enough to move me to the high end phone instead of being an iPhone SE holdout.
posted by Gary at 12:02 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


it's making me feel old and confused about the modern world.

It often feels like the only way I know anything about what's going on in the modern world is by reading snark on MetaFilter. This is not a bad thing.
posted by JanetLand at 12:02 PM on September 12 [8 favorites]


I don't understand why it didn't work last time and why it's novel and going to be useful this time.

See also - USB, wireless networking, touchscreen tablets, etc. Apple is good at ironing out the details in tech that has been tried in other places but spun its wheels.
posted by Slap*Happy at 12:02 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


I love the 'end to end' touting about the screen, while that ghastly whatthehell is sitting center top, pretending not to exist.
posted by rc3spencer at 12:03 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


How hard is it to plug in? I mean, I don't have an issue with it at all. Never have. Plus, a charging pad is likely to be bulkier and harder to travel with than a Lightning cable.

With a USB-C port it's not as big a deal as before with Micro-USB, but there are advantages to wireless charging, for sure.

However, I have one particular use case where Qi comes in very handy.
posted by linux at 12:03 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I really don't get the apparently universal appeal of wireless charging. I mean, why?

Maybe it's not for you?

The main reason why I like it is I like keeping my devices topped up when I'm sitting down at my work or home desk. When the Nexus devices I used had Qi, it was a simple matter of just setting it down and then being able to easily pick it up and look over it without having any wires in the way.

I'm looking forward to breaking out all the chargers again for the new iPhones, because then it means that it's always topped off.

It also means that I can now bring a single larger charger for my Moto 360 2nd Gen (uses Qi) and the new iPhone, rather than having to get the weird oddly shaped one for just the Moto 360 when I travel.
posted by anem0ne at 12:04 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I'm just dubious since the last iteration didn't work out.

It's the same thing though? It's not a new iteration at all.
posted by anem0ne at 12:06 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Wireless charging is great; I have a wireless charging pad on my home desk, work desk, and nightstand. I never have to do anything to keep my phone charged, I just set it down and it's done. It's really nice at work because I'm often coming and going from my desk and can pick up my phone without futzing with cords.

It is quite a bit slower than charging over a cable, but this is easily mitigated by the fact that it's on a power source for 16 hours a day instead of 8. My battery really only ever has to last my commute.
posted by 0xFCAF at 12:08 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


The main reason why I like it is I like keeping my devices topped up when I'm sitting down at my work or home desk.

Yep. I don't travel with a Qi charger pad, just USB-C cables and a USB power brick. Like I said, it's much easier now that USB-C is around and I don't have to fiddle with making sure I've got the plug orientation right. But for work, in the car, and on my bedside table, Qi hockey pucks await.
posted by linux at 12:09 PM on September 12


It's also a step towards removing the lightning port entirely.
I'm sure they'll do that, and I'm sure it'll piss me off, too. I don't do streaming services, and I like to keep a lot of music on my phone, so that means I still sync with iTunes. I also like local backups.

USB is faster than wifi, no?
posted by uberchet at 12:10 PM on September 12


They are very, very good at churning up press.
posted by theora55 at 12:11 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


can we assume that we'll be given a POSIX compliant operating system with standard Unix facilities available from the command line interface
Not quite. There still seems to be a bug with their implementation of chmod, wherein a user can "chmod +x app" but then Apple doesn't get 30% of the revenue.
posted by roystgnr at 12:12 PM on September 12 [8 favorites]


@KenTremendous:
APPLE: The iPhone 8 is the most incredible machine ever built.
ALSO APPLE: Fuck that old outdated piece of garbage. Here's IPhone X!
posted by zombieflanders at 12:14 PM on September 12 [25 favorites]


Guess I'm using my 6 Plus for a fourth year
posted by Automocar at 12:15 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Okay I just wanna know how the roof is held up on the entrance to the Steve Jobs Theatre. And are they sneaking power up the channels in the glass?
posted by JoeZydeco at 12:16 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


I have an iPhone 5, it's about 3 years old. I'm so annoyed you don't get a "free" phone anymore with your cell phone plan- the thought of paying $25, 30 a month for a phone on top of everything else just seems insane to me, but there really aren't any other options. I should have upgraded back when I could have done a trade-in. Blah.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 12:17 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


RETINA: The best display that could ever be made. It matches, nay, exceeds the human eye in resolution, color gamut, dynamic range, and response time. To attempt to improve it would be stark hubris, for it is perfection made manifest. A display that speaks to our commitment to hone the human-computer interface to the point that it vanishes into pure experience.

SUPER RETINA: It's better than Retina, upgrade now.
posted by 0xFCAF at 12:18 PM on September 12 [23 favorites]


USB is faster than wifi, no?

Depends? Under ideal conditions, with the majority of Lightning cables being USB 2 (480Mbit/s), it's slower than basic 802.11ac (867Mbit/s).

Some Lightning cables are USB3, which ups it to 5Gbit/s, but the top speed for handhelds right now with ac is 3.39Gbit/s.

So it depends on use cases and what you're doing and how far from signal and how new your cable is...
posted by anem0ne at 12:19 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


it was Flavor-aid
posted by sandettie light vessel automatic at 12:20 PM on September 12 [22 favorites]


So, should I retire my flip-phone now?
posted by Thorzdad at 12:23 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


I downgraded to a clamshell for emergencies only. You know, if if if something's worth saying, I-it's worth eye contact.
posted by filthy light thief at 12:26 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


"We went back to the drawing board and thought up new ways we could copy Samsung and call it new and original. This phone has some of the best features copied from our competitors, showing Apple's ability to innovate in doing the same thing other companies have already been doing for years."
posted by fremen at 12:27 PM on September 12 [7 favorites]


Have to admit, I didn't see the iXplode app coming. Thought nobody was ever going to match the sheer power of the Samsung Gren8.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 12:30 PM on September 12 [6 favorites]


Guess I'm using my 6 Plus for a fourth year

iPhone 4 still going strong.
posted by run"monty at 12:33 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


As a developer I'm wondering if I'll ever have to deal with that weird notch at the top.
posted by Artw at 12:37 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Guess I'm using my 6 Plus for a fourth year

iPhone 4 still going strong.


5 here but I'll probably upgrade so I can keep up with iOS 11. Looks like the 8+ is basically the same as the X except for the display and the home button. OLEDs are great but that and facial recognition aren't worth $200 to me.
posted by CheeseDigestsAll at 12:42 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


I have an iPhone 7 Plus. After my house and car, it's the most expensive thing I own. I kept my last iPhone 9 years, so I'm not apologizing for it. (I wasn't able to get new apps for my old phone for quite awhile. It was a bit of a shock to visit the app store I find nearly all the games have "in-app purchases." Weird!)
posted by SPrintF at 12:54 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


How about if the thief severs your head and carries it off with them. Is there a protection against that?

Don't tell those roving gangs of thieves who have created an epidemic of severed thumbs. You might give them ideas.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 12:59 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Every year I hope that they'll announce a global switch for iTunes Match that defaults all matched music to "explicit" and every year I am disappointed.
posted by eustacescrubb at 12:59 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


As a developer I'm wondering if I'll ever have to deal with that weird notch at the top.

I wonder if the little display bits on either side can be isolated and used independently.
posted by ZeusHumms at 1:02 PM on September 12


So, should I retire my flip-phone now?

Samsung Announces Plans for Galaxy Note Smartphone With Bendable Display in 2018.
posted by Gary at 1:22 PM on September 12


iPhone X is going to be amazing, just look at some of the features:
• lengthy story mode
• more gruesome fatalities
• online matchmaking
• enhanced graphics
posted by Fizz at 1:23 PM on September 12 [12 favorites]


more gruesome fatalities

Not to be confused with the iPhone xXx: Xander Cage Edition
posted by peeedro at 1:27 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


I find it disturbing how attendees mindlessly applause when Cook introduces a product or an update, not knowing what is to come

There needs to be an iOS app for the sole purpose of playing the "woots" that come from the crowd every single time they announce something. I swear the people doing that are paid by Apple and planted in the crowd. Use it at the State of the Union address or similar.

It's like a tent revival meeting for singularitarians

The phony Apple sanctimony has really redlined. Jobs may have had a reality distortion field, but "town squares" and all the other BS piety evidenced by Cook et al is really becoming intolerable. I'm surprised they don't have Cook wearing a mitre and Apple minions waving incense around him.

We definitely need a Rust Cohle commentary on these keynotes.
posted by CosmicRayCharles at 1:36 PM on September 12 [5 favorites]


Some day I may actually buy a cell phone. I can't figure what good they are.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 1:36 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Some day I may actually buy a horseless carriage. I can't figure what good they are.
posted by Faint of Butt at 1:39 PM on September 12 [7 favorites]


How about if the thief severs your head and carries it off with them. Is there a protection against that?

Download your conscience and back it up with iCloud, only $19.99 a month!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 1:40 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I've never even heard of phones. Why am I here? What is this.
posted by 0xFCAF at 1:42 PM on September 12 [21 favorites]


they have the internet on computers now
posted by entropicamericana at 1:43 PM on September 12 [8 favorites]


CosmicRayCharles: "We definitely need a Rust Cohle commentary on these keynotes."

I would totally pay to hear that.
posted by chavenet at 1:44 PM on September 12


peeedro: "Apple cords suck. I've had dental floss that lasted longer than Apple cables."

This is what got me to change to Android.
posted by signal at 1:57 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


They didn't offer me a choice about changing to an Android. Just let themselves in and started fitting me for parts. I have to say, the laser pointer in my right index finger comes in very handy during presentations, though, as does the remote clicker in my left palm. Also all the guns are pretty cool. So in infrared hindsight, I probably would have opted into Android, anyway. But it would have been nice to be asked.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:04 PM on September 12 [11 favorites]


I have more money and less sense than ever.
posted by Burhanistan at 2:05 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Charging that kind of money for a phone. I don't think so.
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 2:12 PM on September 12


You know, if if if something's worth saying, I-it's worth eye contact.

Also: if you don't know what someone smells like, they're a stranger.
posted by acb at 2:14 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


And sometimes they're stranger after you know what they smell like.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:17 PM on September 12



As a developer I'm wondering if I'll ever have to deal with that weird notch at the top.

I wonder if the little display bits on either side can be isolated and used independently.


AFAIK, it's one display, that happens to miss pixels in an area at the top (and also at the corners). You can draw to those phantom pixels as to anywhere else, but what you draw there won't appear.

From what I understand, the design/manufacturing techniques for LCD/OLED panels these days are such that they can cut off arbitrary pixels from the edges without killing the adjacent intact pixels. This has been the case since the round-faced Android smartwatches of a few years ago (whose displays were undoubtedly internally represented as rectangular RGB grids).
posted by acb at 2:17 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Charging that kind of money for a phone. I don't think so.

Yeah, they did also introduce new models that are more in line with previous iPhones' prices, which basically says to me they agree that's too expensive for most people.
posted by aubilenon at 2:23 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


Incidentally phone charging cords which don't have heavy braid over them are always failing. I do have problems finding places to plug in when I am out and about. I always have to carry some sort of charger.
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 2:23 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Anker makes braided lighting-certified cables for about $10 a pop. Their equivalent USB-C cables are among the best I've ever used for Android phones.
posted by bonehead at 2:25 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


It's not just the price, it's the fragility and the size. I do use an Otterbox. At whatever point I upgrade from my 5SE it'll be something less expensive. I really don't want to be That Poor Person!
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 2:27 PM on September 12


As a long time Mac user and ex-consultant, I switched to using PC's for my home use almost a decade ago and not really felt any pain. Just bought my first iPhone because 'security' and 'wtf' why not find out why all the hype.
I am thoroughly unimpressed. What's up with the maniac Home button pressing, it's archaic. When they talk about a walled garden ecosystem, that's exactly what using IOS 10 feels like, a little room where not much happens. I'm occasionally impressed by the beautiful visuals or integration but not so much by the overall experience. My Blackberry Z30 was far more fun and easy to use by comparison, sadly becoming obsolete and no longer supporting my most used applications, like Evernote. The machine ran Blackberry OS and Android in emulation and did it with style and intelligence.
Hard to believe I am considering switching to Android after purchasing this phone but I find it a confining and poorly mapped experience. The $1k iBone just confirms this for me, Apple's become a soulless corporate system and completely lost its way.
posted by diode at 2:28 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Also pocket size matters.
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 2:28 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


iPhone X: Buy it By Any Means Necessary
posted by 4ster at 2:29 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Yeah, they did also introduce new models that are more in line with previous iPhones' prices, which basically says to me they agree that's too expensive for most people.

The word on the street is that the OLED panel is only available from one source: Samsung. And it was pretty crazy expensive to begin with. And Apple isn't too chummy with Samsung these days. And yields on the panel are not as great as they should have been by this point.

Long story short, the X might be $1k not because they're reaching for Veblen territory (although IMO they will hit it unintentionally), but because they're trying to stifle demand until the sources pick up and Apple can find another manufacturer.
posted by JoeZydeco at 2:31 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


I'm not going to like iPhone X but will buy it. THANKS FOR NOTHING APPLE.     >:(
posted by mazola at 2:32 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


have it shipped to me and i will like it for you
posted by entropicamericana at 2:38 PM on September 12 [9 favorites]


$999? For a phone?!? I feel like this is what's wrong with the world today.

Charging that kind of money for a phone. I don't think so.


I mean, I don't use Apple stuff personally, but I've been looking for a new phone. The Samsung Galaxy Note 8 is $930, the S8+ is $830, the top Sony phone is $800 and the Pixel XL is $780 (all unlocked B&H prices). So that's something like a 20% Apple tax - certainly one reason I don't use Apple - but otherwise not out of the range of typical top-of-the-line smartphones; it's just the first one whose price rounds to a thousand dollars.

I'm replacing my phone because my old phone is 3 years old; that seems to be my cycle, which would make a thousand dollar phone cost about a buck a day. Probably the only thing I own that I use more than my phone is my bed, which I'm unconscious for most of the time. There are a lot of things I've bought that have given me a lot less value per use than my phone, even when I buy an expensive one.

And what's right with the world today is that the Wirecutter pick for best budget phone is only $220, and it does between 85% and 100% of what the top-of-the-line phone does, depending on your needs. A few years ago, if you didn't pony up (a slightly lower) top dollar for a smartphone, you had something that had wildly less functionality.
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 2:39 PM on September 12 [5 favorites]


I want to be more cynical about Apple and their culture of wireless gee-whizzery, but I just drove three hundred and some miles to Homer, NY to perform a spoken-word-and-music gig with a knob controller, a tiny keyboard, and my (64-bit A9 processor) iPhone SE (running Apesoft's Mood and Loopy HD) to the smirking amusement of my friends in the festival, who rent full-size commercial vans to transport thousands of pounds of retromodern modular synthesizers to these events. They sure talk slick, but from where I stand, there's still a shitload of genuine future in those little machines.
posted by sonascope at 2:44 PM on September 12 [17 favorites]


I switched to using PC's for my home use almost a decade ago and not really felt any pain.
The machine ran Blackberry OS and Android in emulation and did it with style and intelligence.
I found the contrarian.
posted by uberchet at 2:44 PM on September 12 [7 favorites]


I run MetaFilter on a sliderule.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:45 PM on September 12 [16 favorites]


Metafilter: I don't even understand that comment but I'll favourite it.
posted by ZeusHumms at 2:58 PM on September 12 [12 favorites]


I would like to make a public apology to Hermione Granger for my comment upthread. On re-read it comes across as more prickly or pointy than I meant for it to be.

I really don't mean to diminish your joy in this.

I'm actually earnestly curious to hear about how you went from retail to working alongside engineers and designers in any capacity, because I was under the impression that this kind of thing doesn't really happen at Apple any more.

My feelings about Apple as a company and cultural force today are obviously strong and mainly negative, and I grew up drinking - and I do believe I'm going to coin a new one, here - the Apple juice by the gallons as a kid and young adult, and I didn't really stop until about the Era of the Newton and System 7 or so. IBM/PC/Windows was clearly the evil one, Apple meant open and free, etc, etc.

And I've been conflicted about this, because in objective historical reality early Apple and early Steve Jobs weren't really that much different than post OS X and iOS Apple and Steve Jobs, including the lifestyle/cultish aspects.

Just much larger, and more complicated, with a lot more surface area.

I miss Wozniak. Heck, I'm even starting to miss Stallman. I miss the idealism of the computer and network as liberation, not an involuntary enslavement. I miss it being weird, nerdy and even fringe.

I do not like this new all-seeing, all-glowing, all-shiny Apple very much.

I don't like the even more all-seeing crufty android-google hydra, either, but at least the phones are cheaper.
posted by loquacious at 2:59 PM on September 12 [14 favorites]


Metafilter: a tent revival meeting for singularitarians
posted by ZeusHumms at 3:00 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


But I hope they don't remove it until they can actually make the phone waterproof.

The iPhone 7 *is* waterproof. Mine's been underwater. I do ludicrously long bike rides with one on my handlebars for navigation in heavy rain, completely unprotected. I will happily run it under a tap. It shows no signs of water ingress.

(though I doubt they'll ever stop hedging their bets with warranty coverage)
posted by grahamparks at 3:00 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Yeah, there's a part of me that.. I dunno, a 5.8" screen in a device that's only marginally larger than my standard 4.7" iPhone 7? (5mm taller, 3mm wider and .4mm thicker) Yesplz. And for all the sticker shock shirt-rending, it's only $168 more for the first year on an Apple iPhone Upgrade Program compared to a similarly specced iPhone 7 or iPhone 8. I think I can manage it, considering I get the dual camera OIS system from the plus in a pocketable form factor? mmmm. I'll reconsider whether I need the "aspirational" model the year later, or if FaceID and the screen tech and camera tech moves down the line to the "mainstream" model. (Ok, this is probably highly location-dependent, and I get that the iPUP is USian and and and. Still, see Homeboy Trouble's post above. Just because the ceiling is hovering around $1000 for the top tier phones does not mean that lower end devices aren't available. Sheesh.)

And yeah, I'm going to have to see if Ram makes a Qi compatible charger mount or if I can wodge one onto my existing phone mounting arm. I'm already sold on wireless charging from my watches, I just didn't want it to be the extremely fussy docking like some of the original wireless specs. But if I can just put it on a pad and it works? I'm down with that.

After 6 years of dicking around trying to make my BMW head unit talk right to my various iPhones (the head unit was made juuust before the switch to both lightning and standardized 5W charging, solutions were various and hacky), I finally bit the bullet and bought a bluetooth head unit adaptor for like $80, and suddenly my phone is controllable with my head unit? And just sort of automatically when I start the car for short trips? aw gosh how terrible. But yeah, I really definitely want a tether for the initial media load. None of the wireless, cloud-like Apple systems has managed to not completely eat it when I'm shoving 171 gigs of music at it. Maybe Apple Music would manage better? But I don't have to spend anything more for the 18,000 songs I already own, so... Maybe they could spend some of their 80 gazillion dollars on making iTunes not suck so hard.

I feel for the guys that needed lightning MIDI + 1/8" AUX for audio purposes and acknowledge that people have different experiences, but yeesh some of these complaints are played out guys.
posted by Kyol at 3:03 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


It's Raining Florence Henderson: "I run MetaFilter on a sliderule."

Pff, luxury!
posted by Chrysostom at 3:07 PM on September 12 [5 favorites]


(though I doubt they'll ever stop hedging their bets with warranty coverage)

From my understanding, you have to be a special kind of dick to get them to not just shrug and fix it if you have the extended warranty plan, anyway. I've had nothing but the best of experience with AppleCare+ when it comes down to it, even though I've only really needed it like 2 or 3 times on my phones. I'm more ambivalent about it on laptops/desktops, but it was a bargain even before screen replacement was a $29 incident.
posted by Kyol at 3:07 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


After reading about all the new shiny things I am getting confused. What is the point of shelling out all that money for an iPhone X if you can just leave it at home while you wear your new Apple Watch?
posted by TedW at 3:08 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Loquacious, that's a lovely post.

It's interesting to me that "your" Apple was really the beginning of mine. I didn't start using Macs full time until the last days of OS9, and didn't really become a fan of the platform until OSX. I'm still here, even though the hardware choices recently have been offputting enough to delay upgrades for me.

How do you feel about Apple's increasingly public position as privacy guardian?
posted by uberchet at 3:10 PM on September 12


Kramers into thread:

Motorola Moto G price performance champ 3 years running hooaaaaahhh

Kramers out of thread yelling something about Android being really good nowwww
posted by Sebmojo at 3:13 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


loquacious: I miss Wozniak

FWIW, Woz appears to have been in the audience at the keynote today, and the camera cut to him or someone who looks a LOT like him for reaction shots a couple of times.
posted by hanov3r at 3:16 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


The only Apple product I've ever owned was a Powerbook G3. It came with an iBook ufo-style charger, because I got it near the end of life and the charger they originally released with it got recalled because they would short out and catch fire. The UFO charger itself eventually shorted out and there was a whole class-action lawsuit. Mine didn't catch fire, but since it was clear I got to see all the sparks as it killed itself.

It's been interesting in the more than decade and a half since how consistently I've heard stories about charging cables failing because Apple hates thick cables and strain relief more than they hate electrical fires.
posted by ckape at 3:21 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Upgrade the SE (without removing the headphone jack) and you'll have a winner. Still the perfect size for a phone.
posted by moorooka at 3:22 PM on September 12 [16 favorites]


Agreed. I don't want a phone bigger than the 4" SE. There's a rumor that there's a new one of those coming out in 2018, but no real details or substantiation so far.
posted by rifflesby at 3:32 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


I'm not going to like iPhone X but will buy it.

I arguably should get one, being a professional iOS developer and all, and making part of my income from apps whose design/UX I'm entirely responsible for, and could claim it as a business expense, though the gargantuan size puts me off a bit. The iPhone 6S I have is slightly larger than ideal in my opinion (if they had something in the iPhone 5 form factor with 128+Gb of storage and a decent camera, I'd prefer that), and the 6+ was a bridge too far, so the iPhone X, despite its groundbreaking/gorgeous design and nifty features, is off the radar. Were I to upgrade now, it might well be to an 8, ideally with an external case that has a headphone socket.

Now next year, once the bezelless screen design has migrated to smaller phones, that might be another story. Especially if they've developed an under-screen fingerprint sensor and brought back Touch ID, but kept the front camera array for Animoji and stuff.
posted by acb at 3:32 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Upgrade the SE (without removing the headphone jack) and you'll have a winner. Still the perfect size for a phone.

It gives me a glimmer of hope that they are keeping it in the lineup instead of pushing the 6 down to fill that price point. Now if I can only get them to make a MacBook Pro SE with a current processor but the keyboard they shipped with up until a few years ago.
posted by Gary at 3:39 PM on September 12


I miss those hills.
posted by humboldt32 at 3:42 PM on September 12


So, uh, does the new iPhone have a lanyard hole? Because that's the only feature I really want from a new phone.
posted by asperity at 3:45 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


IKEA sells Qi furniture. So there's that.

I think they are leaving the lightning port to support charging in cars older than like...2016, and because there are lots of people who like to use their USB devices with their iOS devices. Photographers in the field who want to get their photos off of their SLR cameras and onto their iOS devices would be pissed if they removed that port. People with MIDI equipment hooked up to their phones would be pissed. People who want to use headphones would be pissed! Non-starter for the foreseeable future, removing that port.
posted by oceanjesse at 3:45 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


People who want to use headphones would be pissed!

Yes, that would indeed be unacceptable.
posted by acb at 3:52 PM on September 12 [8 favorites]


the 6+ was a bridge too far, so the iPhone X, despite its groundbreaking/gorgeous design and nifty features, is off the radar

FWIW, the iPhone X is a bit thicker than the 6+, but it's smaller in the other two dimensions. Still it's a big phone for sure.
posted by aubilenon at 3:55 PM on September 12


The Android people flipping out over the price of the X have curiously not lost their cool at Red, who's got an android phone coming out for $1200, and only if you pre-order, otherwise it's $1500 at launch. The X has a world-beater screen and hardware accelerated machine learning baked into the SoC. The Hydrogen One is only going to have the former, due to glasses-free 3D that seems truly cool, but will likely still be LCD. They will both be built like tanks. (As is Motorola. My original Droid with the slide-out keyboard still boots without a problem and toodles around the web on wifi. If you need a cheap phone that does expensive phone things far longer than is reasonable, the Moto G is where you want to be.)

In all honesty, the X is a prestige product designed to get early adopters in enough quantity to tempt devs into finding a use for the Bionic part of the A11 Bionic, and to ease the userbase into a post-home-button world.

What I needed but didn't get:

1) Updated Mac Mini.
2) Licensing the sync features of the Air Buds to other can manufacturers
3) A Beats audio device that doesn't suck.
4) An iTunes that's usable.
posted by Slap*Happy at 4:35 PM on September 12 [7 favorites]


Something tells me that in six weeks, there's gonna be a Mac-oriented thing, and we're all going to be doing this again as everyone falls all over themselves to broadcast their shibboleths about how this new speaker and/or iMac Pro can't possibly be worthwhile or even good. What fun.
posted by DoctorFedora at 4:51 PM on September 12 [7 favorites]


4) An iTunes that's usable.

I understand all of those words, but not in that order. You might as well ask for "delicious artisinal Spam."
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 4:54 PM on September 12 [15 favorites]


I understand all of those words, but not in that order. You might as well ask for "delicious artisinal Spam."
Yeah, I don't think anyone actually likes iTunes at this point as a piece of software. It's the junk drawer that needs to be cleaned out.

Like, at this point, I genuinely believe that the numerous complaints that Apple doesn't redefine entire industries a little more often are only slightly less misguided than the idea that iTunes can be fixed in some way other than rebuilding it from the ground up as a collection of smaller, more focused apps. There's no compelling reason today why a music player should be the thing you use to do an OS restore on what is conceivably a more powerful computer in the case of older Macs and newer iPads.
posted by DoctorFedora at 4:59 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


Well, and something else the lightning port brings is a recovery method - brick your phone and you can do a tethered recovery with iTunes. If your Apple Watch manages to brick (somehow - failed OS update, whatever), all you can do is send it back to Apple. And wireless charging is still a fraction of wired charging rates, so it'll be around until they're ready to give up the 80% charge in an hour schtick.
posted by Kyol at 5:01 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Yeah, they did also introduce new models that are more in line with previous iPhones' prices, which basically says to me they agree that's too expensive for most people.

Maybe they read those articles about the Apple watch going against the egalitarianism of the iPhone and decided something had to be done.
posted by ckape at 5:06 PM on September 12


Artw: "They should have collaborated with Disney and got the Moana crab to do its song here."

I spent a long, dark, bitter time in deep depression after a difficult breakup with an ex whose name was Moana.

I also own & prefer to use Apple laptops, desktops, & phones.

I guess what I'm trying to say is your comment brings up some … interesting … emotions for me. But, on the whole, I find it more hilarious than you could possibly imagine, while simultaneously being completely unable to favourite it ;)
posted by Pinback at 5:07 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


yeah, the tinfoil hat wearing side of me thinks that Itunes is a "digital copyright permission enforcement gatekeeper" dressed up as an entertainment service
posted by idiopath at 5:47 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


yeah, the tinfoil hat wearing side of me thinks that Itunes is a "digital copyright permission enforcement gatekeeper" dressed up as an entertainment service

The iTunes music store is DRM-free. The streaming service is DRM-laden, like all streaming service. The movies are DRM-laden, as are literally all the other options. Apple is giving people who purchased 1080p movies free upgrades to 4K HDR versions, just as they did for the transition from 720p to 1080p. There are plenty of criticisms of iTunes to be made, but I'm not sure "digital copyright permission enforcement gatekeeper" (whatever that is) is one of them.
posted by entropicamericana at 5:53 PM on September 12 [9 favorites]


> I miss Wozniak. Heck, I'm even starting to miss Stallman. I miss the idealism of the computer and network as liberation, not an involuntary enslavement. I miss it being weird, nerdy and even fringe.

when networked computer tech went from nerdy and fringe to ubiquitous and mandatory, the old-school basically apolitical technoutopian stuff became untenable as a position — we received a long and painful education in how liberation is less about what technology we have and more about who owns the means of production of that technology, and about the labor relations present within the society that uses that technology.1 All that's left of the original naïve technoutopianism is a creepy smiling mask ("apple stores are town squares!") stretched over the grim skull of capitalist exploitation.2

As a result most of the weird nerdy fringe folk have moved on from experimenting with computers and into experimenting with communism instead.3

1: Basically most of the late 20th c. technoutopians fetishized the potential for newness present within digital technology, but overlooked how those new potentials would be viciously pruned back to only include those which effectively serve the maintenance and extension of the rule of capital-owners. They focused on the potential for exciting new social mutations, without recognizing that the only mutations which would persist would be those that could survive capitalism's process of unnatural selection.

2: okay, so really it's survived in two forms: in the form of silicon valley's banal parody of technoutopianism, and in the form of creepy technolibertarian cypherpunk shit like bitcoin.

3: Stallman, as always, was ahead of his time on this one. Unfortunately Stallman is and always has been more than a little bit of a "missing stair."
posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 5:56 PM on September 12 [15 favorites]


Wireless charging is a very nice feature to have.

Is it earth shattering? No.

Is it nice that I can simply set my phone down and have it begin charging without any two handed fiddling and poking? Yes.

Do I have to worry about my (Nexus, not Apple so this may all be irrelevant to some) phone ever seeing a charging port failure that nukes the device altogether? Not as likely.
posted by RolandOfEld at 6:17 PM on September 12


The real news today, Apple's best phone, the iPhone 5SE, dropped in price from $400 to $350. It's a great device, it has the camera and processor of the 6s, with the smaller form factor. It has a slower touch ID (I think the same as the 5s?), but still pretty good.
posted by skewed at 6:27 PM on September 12 [13 favorites]


Man, yeah, the "town square" thing was a little cringeworthy.
posted by DoctorFedora at 6:39 PM on September 12 [5 favorites]


"Village Green" would be a thousand times better.
posted by Ice Cream Socialist at 6:46 PM on September 12


We are the Village Green Preservation Society.
God save power cords, headphone jacks and variety.
posted by parki at 6:57 PM on September 12 [15 favorites]


Jesus, people we get it. You're not gonna buy an iPhone.
posted by Big Al 8000 at 7:08 PM on September 12 [14 favorites]


Also they're cooler and nerdier than you are. That's the most important bit.
posted by aramaic at 7:13 PM on September 12 [9 favorites]


Random drive-by responses, sorry:

This is the point where I start to agree with Hermione. Calling Apple's brand a cult is on the verge of becoming as much of a cult as it is.

Some years back when I was still pretty new to the site, a number of other members seemed to take pleasure in tearing into me for not always describing Apple devices in the best possible terms, despite the fact that I *had* an iPad that I enjoyed using. That convinced me that the Apple cult is a lot more cultier than the anti-Apple cult, especially since there is little cult-competition anymore--Android is the pragmatic, fall-back mobile OS, and good luck finding someone all-in on Microsoft these days.

Apple does some things very well, but it's regularly known now that you're paying a bit extra for the Apple Tax, in all their products.

The Android people flipping out over the price of the X have curiously not lost their cool at Red, who's got an android phone coming out for $1200, and only if you pre-order, otherwise it's $1500 at launch.

False comparison. The latest-and-greatest iOS product can only be got from Apple, whereas there's tons of competition in the Android space. What would be an Android company doing something a bit crazy is the only game in town for an iPhone devotee looking for edition N+1.

Yeah, I don't think anyone actually likes iTunes at this point as a piece of software. It's the junk drawer that needs to be cleaned out.

And yet there was a time when it was indeed pretty cool, before it got saddled with so many extra functions. Before it became the interface to ALL iDevices from the outside world, before it had to be able to recover and restore such devices, before it had media stores bundled with it, people legitimately used it as their media player. Now it's a huge bloated mess that even tries to install a piece of itself in your startup, so you've always got a bit of iTunes running on your system unless you get that bit out--and it'll put it back there the next time it updates itself.

I miss Wozniak. Heck, I'm even starting to miss Stallman.

You miss him now? Give it 20 years.

the old-school basically apolitical technoutopian stuff became untenable as a position

I believe the last chapter has yet to be written on this....
posted by JHarris at 7:34 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


personally i like the iphone company
posted by JimBennett at 7:38 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Oh, yeah, I looooooved iTunes back when it was new and also just a music player. I even dealt with the Windows version since I was on XP at the time, and the instant search (and the idea of cataloguing music as songs, instead of as files, was so much better than WinAMP etc.) made it worth it.

iTunes is not a good piece of software anymore, and it pains me. It doesn't even seem to have the instant search that winnows down your library keystroke by keystroke anymore, and I loved that feature!
posted by DoctorFedora at 7:44 PM on September 12


What would be an Android company doing something a bit crazy is the only game in town for an iPhone devotee looking for edition N+1.

But Apple announced three new phones today. The iPhone X is not at all the only game in Apple's town.
posted by aubilenon at 8:17 PM on September 12 [2 favorites]


Upgrade the SE (without removing the headphone jack) and you'll have a winner. Still the perfect size for a phone.

I'd be perfectly happy to buy a specced up SE every few years for the rest of my life (and not as happy with any of their other options) so I'm sure they won't do it.
posted by atoxyl at 8:27 PM on September 12 [6 favorites]


I'd be perfectly happy to buy a specced up SE every few years for the rest of my life (and not as happy with any of their other options) so I'm sure they won't do it.

Places like India and Nigeria and Brazil exist, so, they will. Apple is actively manufacturing and supporting the SE, the Six S/Plus, the 7/Plus, the 8/Plus and the X. They are a global brand and understand their role in emerging markets and tiered hardware. If anything you will overpay for that SE to subsidize SE iPhones in other markets, and you'll do it, as it's an awesome little phone with first-class software support from Apple. iOS11 due later this month.
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:43 PM on September 12 [5 favorites]


The iPhone 6S I have is slightly larger than ideal in my opinion (if they had something in the iPhone 5 form factor with 128+Gb of storage and a decent camera, I'd prefer that)

You're in luck - this is literally what the iPhone SE is. It's a 6S (it even has the 6S camera) that is the size of a 5. You can get it with 128GB of storage. It has a headphone port. They are still selling it, it will run the latest iOS 11, and they just dropped the price.

It's just SE, not 5SE!
posted by Pruitt-Igoe at 8:44 PM on September 12 [5 favorites]


I have never owned an iPhone, but could see maybe an iPhone SE without a carrier. Here's a question: right now I have a little candy-bar phone that I bought for like $20 from a T-Mobile store seceral years ago. Basically, I buy 500 or 1000 minutes of talking time every few months (or once/twice a year), so it's pretty cheap and there's no monthly charges.
Can this be done with a carrier-less iPhone SE? Like pay for the phone and then just buy a lump of minutes in a "pay as you go" manner?
posted by blueberry at 9:07 PM on September 12


As much as any other phone, presumably! I actually got the 7 Plus last year because "best camera available in a cell phone" is a very, very strong selling point for me, but the SE has been really tempting to me from time to time just because I like using phones one-handed, and the 6 I'd had previously was only barely one-handable. I thought maybe the Plus would be so far in that direction that my brain would be able to compartmentalize it as a new thing altogether, but nope: just sort of uncomfortable to hold for long stretches overall.

On the other hand, I've noticed a really weird phenomenon with owning the Plus model, because after a month or so it felt "normal" in my own hand, but when I see literally anyone else using one, no matter how close it is to the one in my own hand, it just looks like a giant cafeteria tray and I start to wonder if, when they travel, they can store it in the overhead compartment or if they have to check it
posted by DoctorFedora at 9:30 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Can this be done with a carrier-less iPhone SE? Like pay for the phone and then just buy a lump of minutes in a "pay as you go" manner?

The lump of minutes thing doesn't really work with smartphones because the primary use case for many isn't using the smartphone as a phone* but as an internet-connected pocket computer, which requires data. Smartphones often use data even when you're not actively engaging with the device. There are pay as you go plans for smartphones but they start at around $30/month for some amount of data and often unlimited talk and text.

*For example, I've owned my 6S for two years. I've used 4 minutes of voice. My previous iPhone went to its new owner with all of 18 lifetime minutes racked up in voice (it was a chatty 3 years).
posted by jamaro at 9:36 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


If you run over on your "unlimited" LTE data plan, checking the time on your cellular Apple Watch will start costing you 15$ per extra gigabye.

Hah! Why would I need an Apple Watch when I can just go to whattimeisitrightnow.com?

(That's a Bojack Horseman reference, the new season is good.)
posted by jcreigh at 9:37 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


From what I've read so far, the iPhone X is supposedly introducing new biometric features including facial recognition to unlock. This is pretty much the last thing I'd want on my phone. For me, privacy and security is primary. Now looking for an alternative, as I'm sure others are as well.

Which smartphone companies prioritize privacy and security higher than Apple?
posted by fairmettle at 11:05 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


Apple is just as bad as anyone else, according to my uninformed hot take! They're all just as bad! Nothing ever distinguishes anything in a way that can't be expressed with numbers on a checklist.

(Seriously, though, the stuff about how they made facial recognition actually secure, instead of something that will go viral like every time Samsung or Microsoft has implemented one and it's defeated with a Facebook selfie, was insane. The stuff about getting Hollywood professionals in to make ultra-realistic masks to make sure that they weren't good enough to fool it was really impressive.)
posted by DoctorFedora at 11:34 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


I have no data plan for my iPhone 6 Plus, I run it on a pay as you go plan, with no monthly fee. The significant increase in wifi hot spots means I rarely am without internet connectivity, and I have never noticed any issues with lapses in data. I am looking to possibly get the iPhone X, but I have no plans to change my phone plan. The SE should run perfectly fine in your desired use, blueberry.
posted by birdsquared at 11:36 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


From what I've read so far, the iPhone X is supposedly introducing new biometric features including facial recognition to unlock. This is pretty much the last thing I'd want on my phone.

It’s not a phone anymore and it’s not yours. For each new generation of these devices, it’s becoming more clear that what started out as a mobile phone is developing into a surveillance instrument. Your personal DataCollector™ or whatever you want to call it. We should be thinking more about what tools and devices we want, instead of admiring, discussing and accepting what we are given.

Bonus link: the German author Ernst Jünger imagined something pretty much like an internet connected smart phone already in 1949. He wasn’t wowed by this technology, he understood its capacity for surveillance.
posted by Termite at 12:57 AM on September 13 [1 favorite]


So the great iTunes unpacking job has begun...

Farewell to the App Store in iTunes (and a few other pieces of that oversized puzzle)
posted by pjm at 1:21 AM on September 13 [6 favorites]


Well, that's a fair start. I'm even impressed that they've kept things like custom ringtones in mind, and that the instructions to add them to the phone now make sense.

But, really, it needs to be broken up into multiple apps:
  • Media Library Manager: manage all media - music, video, podcasts, books, photos, etc - from a single place.
  • App Library Manager: manage all your iOS & OSX apps properly (including per-device version management; not everybody updates - or even can update - everything to the latest OS version). Bonus points for managing multiple/family accounts, and the ability to completely delete junk/useless purchases from your accounts.
  • Apple Store: buy/rent everything from here - media, books, apps, etc.
  • iPhone/iPod Manager: The central point for dealing with your iPhone/iPod. Handles backups/restores/updates/configuration, and accesses the Media & App libraries to load/unload media, playlists, apps, etc.
  • Plus separate OSX apps for Media Player, Photo Browser, Book Reader, etc. that also access the main libraries.
And for God's sake, stop trying to tie it all to 'the Cloud' - some of us don't have unlimited (or even large or cheap) data plans, some of us want to access things while working completely/frequently/intermittently offline, and some of us just want to keep it all locally and handle our own backups etc. thank you very much….
posted by Pinback at 5:36 AM on September 13 [1 favorite]


Basically, I buy 500 or 1000 minutes of talking time every few months (or once/twice a year), so it's pretty cheap and there's no monthly charges. Can this be done with a carrier-less iPhone SE? Like pay for the phone and then just buy a lump of minutes in a "pay as you go" manner?

blueberry, there are providers that offer that. Here's one example (scroll down a bit on the page). I think this might be easier to find with "MVNOs," which are basically resellers who use the existing wireless infrastructure but don't own them. You bring your own phone and pre-pay for minutes/text/data.
posted by aka burlap at 6:10 AM on September 13


Now that every man, woman, and child over the age of six has an iPhone, I wanted to see even more and even better family controls for parents (like what happens to purchased items now that my kid turned 18?), and better tools for families to share photos (because we can't have a shared Photo.app library, and none of use have enough iCloud storage to keep separate libraries and also share with each other).
posted by wenestvedt at 8:18 AM on September 13 [1 favorite]


I just sold my iPhone 6s Plus and got a used iPhone SE. I am tired of big phones.
posted by 4ster at 8:38 AM on September 13 [6 favorites]


The iPhone X reminds me of when touchscreen interfaces started being introduced in cars, demanding that drivers look at the screens to do anything. I think it's possible that one year Apple will release a black, featureless slate with a simulated black button which when pushed shows a message in black font on a slightly more black background.
posted by ZeusHumms at 8:50 AM on September 13 [2 favorites]


Will the button make it fly into the sun?
posted by Zalzidrax at 9:49 AM on September 13 [2 favorites]


Yes.
posted by ZeusHumms at 9:54 AM on September 13 [2 favorites]


Ha
@PHP_CEO
DUE TO COMPANY PASSWORD POLICY WE WILL BE REQUIRING ALL STAFF WHO GET THE NEW IPHONE TO HAVE THEIR FACE SURGICALLY ALTERED EVERY 90 DAYS
posted by jamaro at 10:04 AM on September 13 [18 favorites]


[bd]ad jokes (none of the them mine):

- Does introducing the 8/X this year mean that next September will bring us the 9/11 models?

- AirPower is a major lost opportunity; they should have called it Apple Juice.
posted by bonehead at 10:30 AM on September 13 [4 favorites]


I have no data plan for my iPhone 6 Plus, I run it on a pay as you go plan, with no monthly fee. The significant increase in wifi hot spots means I rarely am without internet connectivity, and I have never noticed any issues with lapses in data.

Take proper precautions when connecting to public wifi.
posted by jamaro at 10:35 AM on September 13


Nice to see lots of love for the 4 inch form factor here. I remember being very confused when that hockey player was mocked for taking a photo with an SE, you know, the only phone anyone makes anymore that an average-sized human can fit in their pocket.
posted by Yowser at 11:58 AM on September 13 [2 favorites]


Swinsian is iTunes without the bloat, unfortunately its macOS only not iOS.
posted by Lanark at 12:16 PM on September 13


iTunes successfully chased me away from Apple products after spending too long fighting with it when I had a iPod Mini and then iPod Nano. I can't remember how many times iTunes managed to corrupt the databases on the iPods, not to mention what it did to my music library.

I do have a macbook now but in 1.5 years, I've never started iTunes on it and don't intend to.
posted by octothorpe at 12:32 PM on September 13 [1 favorite]


Same here, octothorpe. I'd spent just as much wasted time trying to re-tag songs and keep my iTunes library organized the way I wanted it (with the proper album cover art, song titles, etc.) as I did keeping viruses and malware at bay when I used Windows computers... only to have things get screwy again after another inevitable shitty iTunes update. Eventually I just gave up and subscribed to Spotify. No regrets. When Spotify doesn't have what I want, I can still listen to my music on my computers using an older version of Vox. I have never bought any music, movies, or tv shows from Apple and probably never will.
posted by LuckySeven~ at 3:41 PM on September 13


I survive using a MacBook by not using any Apple software on it other than Finder* occasionally. Chrome, Outlook, MS-Office, Adobe Photoshop and Lightroom, Oracle Virtual Box and Slack all work pretty well on the Mac although it gets crashy if you run them all at once.

* Has there ever been a worse file manager than Finder? Are they ever going to update it?
posted by octothorpe at 4:04 PM on September 13 [1 favorite]


Yes. Windows Explorer is much worse.
posted by uberchet at 5:00 PM on September 13 [5 favorites]


Ehh. It really isn't, you know.
posted by Artw at 5:45 PM on September 13 [2 favorites]


- AirPower is a major lost opportunity; they should have called it Apple Juice.
I believe the properly accepted structure for perfect jokes like this is "What idiot named it Google Glass instead of Googly Eyes"

(I really like this name though)
posted by DoctorFedora at 6:03 PM on September 13 [3 favorites]


Ehh. It really isn't, you know.

It is, and Safari is just as terrible. If you rely on WebUI's running your app/appliance, you will be using Firefox as the target platform, as they tell you what the hell is going on with their rendering. This doesn't mean Firefox isn't terrible and stupid, it's just terrible and stupid in ways you can rely on. So if your slick "single pane of glass" dashboard doesn't even bother to render, you can just tell your customer, who is probably running NetBSD in a VM on an OpenIndiana server, "Have you tried it in Firefox?" (So sayeth the edge-security/cloud-security admin who apparently cannot use ssh to administrate all of the appliances/applications said admin is responsible for. Just use Firefox, and all of your UI troubles melt away!)
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:12 PM on September 13


Well I don't know about any of that but Explorer does a better job of letting find sort and manipulate files and file structures than Finder does.

It bothers me less these days as I'm more command line reliant my god would I sooner have BASH than the DOS command line, but it's still the case.
posted by Artw at 8:28 PM on September 13


Heads up, Everybody! Public Service Announcement re iTunes:

iTunes 12.7 is now available, but do NOT update unless/until you have a backup plan in place for all of your apps, both previously purchased and those currently installed. I recommend using an app like iMazing.

Apparently, Apple, in their infinite wisdom, has removed the App Store icon/access point. What that means is that you can now only download apps that are still in the AppStore (and the process is more convoluted). Anything that's been removed, you'll no longer be able to download.

Changes In The New iTunes.

Redownload music, movies, TV shows, apps, and books from the iTunes Store, iBooks Store, and App Store.

Redownload previously purchased tones.
__________

Octothorpe, ITA; Finder blows. Check out Nimble Commander.
posted by LuckySeven~ at 8:41 PM on September 13 [4 favorites]


Windows Explorer is worse than Finder (with the reservation that I still haven't used Windows 10 much, but what little I have used makes me doubt it's improved much in that regard). Every Linux file browser I've used (Dolphin, GNOME Files, Thunar, etc.) has been far worse than Finder.

Finder is actually surprisingly good at a number of weird corner cases you wouldn't expect an Apple consumer product to be good at, such as handling browsing directories with a very large number of files without getting stupidly slow, having a built-in batch renaming feature, having a "go to this path that I type in/paste" shortcut, and a bunch of other neat stuff. Plus, column browsing is useful for a lot of scenarios.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 9:13 PM on September 13 [2 favorites]


What kind of user hostile...?

Thin bezels, I get, but entirely bezelless? How do they expect a person to grip it? And what keeps the gorilla glass from shattering when you inevitably drop it on the screen? I would really like to see a trend away from the fragile design phase we seem to be going through. I'd like a phone with gorilla glass and a raised bezel! There is no reason phones cannot be designed to survive being dropped, run over by bicycles, left in the snow, and more. They used to make smartphones that could do that, but apparently nobody gives a shit about durability so it's impossible to find a phone that does better than being waterproof and able to take minor falls that is also a decent phone, much less smartphone.

Also, good reception. It doesn't matter so much most of the time these days with cell networks being way over built so they can handle the massive data traffic, but when 40% of the cell sites in your county are dead, it makes an enormous difference. Rather than barely having service if anything at all, you can keep in communication and maybe even do some work. ;)
posted by wierdo at 10:31 PM on September 13 [1 favorite]


I came here to complain about that iTunes update that removes the app store. It's like the only toilet in your apartment was in the middle of your kitchen and you've been complaining about it to your landlord. And one day you come home and your landlord goes, "Good news! I moved the toilet out of your kitchen!"

"Great! So you put it in the bathroom?"

"Oh, no. I know how much you hated it so I got rid of it completely. My research shows you've been using the toilet at work more and more, so I figure that's the way of the future. I'm just nudging you there a little faster."

"But-- but--"

"Oh, so you complained about having the toilet in your kitchen, and when I fix the problem, you get upset? I can't win with you, can I?"
posted by yankeefog at 2:34 AM on September 14 [7 favorites]


it's impossible to find a phone that does better than being waterproof and able to take minor falls that is also a decent phone, much less smartphone.

There totally are ruggedized smartphones. For instance, Cat (as in Caterpillar) makes some. Bonus: some of them have thermal imaging cameras! (They run android of course)
posted by aubilenon at 3:14 AM on September 14 [1 favorite]


What does a ruggedized phone do that a skinny waterproof phone + rugged case doesn't?
posted by grahamparks at 4:30 AM on September 14 [4 favorites]


Explorer does a better job of letting find sort and manipulate files and file structures than Finder does.
I don't understand how this is true. I use Windows and the Mac every single day, and dealing with files is WAY easier with Finder. Sort is by column which is more or less the same, but among other improvements Finder's search is miles and miles better. The Finder also includes QuickLook, which has no real equivalent on Windows, so searching through a directory of screenshots (for example) is much more of a hassle than it is on the Mac.

What tasks does Explorer make simpler or easier? I'm not being rhetorical; I'm literally asking the question.
posted by uberchet at 6:52 AM on September 14 [1 favorite]


Troy Hunt has a nice article up about a pragmatic view of the security tradeoffs of introducing Face ID: Face ID, Touch ID, No ID, PINs and Pragmatic Security.
posted by Jpfed at 7:43 AM on September 14 [1 favorite]


The Finder also includes QuickLook, which has no real equivalent on Windows,

Wouldn't the equivalent be the preview pane (not enabled by default for most folders)?
posted by Jpfed at 7:45 AM on September 14


but among other improvements Finder's search is miles and miles better.

Everything is a necessity for me on Windows. It doesn't search inside the files, but it is near instant search of filenames across your whole system.
posted by Gary at 8:19 AM on September 14 [2 favorites]




I can see why they would actually want the notch beyond technical limitations. The current iPhone silhouette is iconic with the speaker line at the top and the circle at the bottom. An actual edge to edge display means it would look exactly like every other edge to edge phone. They need something to give it a distinct appearance.

But what a pain in the ass for developers. Why not block that off as a "system" area and always display the status in portrait and go black in landscape mode? Instead everyone has to work around this thing (taking into account if it's 90° vs 270° rotation). It's going to be a bug farm and even when it works things still look stupid in landscape.
posted by Gary at 1:38 PM on September 14


I can see why they would actually want the notch beyond technical limitations. The current iPhone silhouette is iconic with the speaker line at the top and the circle at the bottom. An actual edge to edge display means it would look exactly like every other edge to edge phone. They need something to give it a distinct appearance.

Only for people who are worried about other people recognizing what brand of phone they are using. When I am alone, late at night, I am seldom kept up lovingly staring at the speaker line at the top of my phone.
posted by ActingTheGoat at 2:03 PM on September 14 [1 favorite]


Only for people who are worried about other people recognizing what brand of phone they are using

For sure, but my point is why Apple would want the notch there. I don't think it's entirely a technical shortcoming. Apple the corporate entity is definitely worried about people recognizing what brand of phone you're using.
posted by Gary at 2:17 PM on September 14 [1 favorite]


The notch’s days are clearly numbered — I’m sure it’ll be gone in a generation or two, just because there’s no way they want it there. It’s just that right now, it’s tough to put basically a Kinect in a phone without having to cut part of the screen away, I guess.

I mean, they already have patents about putting stuff behind a transparent display. And if they’re worried about branding, it’s not like the back won’t have the Apple logo, and presumably having a phone that really is 100% edge to edge on the front would still be quite the bit of branding for at least a while.
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:41 PM on September 14


waaay back, someone commented on how companies always showcase their new products, so why complain?. Yeah sure, but at least on our local newscasts, every time there is an iPhone update of any kind (new iPhones in gold!) it makes the damn news. It just feels like a shill, not news of a major breakthrough. Maybe others have examples, but I'm hard pressed to think of technology updates that are regular like this, and so minor. Sure driverless cars made the news, but that was hyuuuuuge. I can't think of a time when new medical technology (unless it was some freakishly new procedure, like test tube babies back when) gets this kinds of coverage, and we're talking life and death. Not a fuckin' phone.

Apple can pimp their products all they want just like any manufacturer, but when newscasters talk about it, I want to punch the screen.
posted by GospelofWesleyWillis at 4:26 PM on September 14 [2 favorites]


oh, and I know there are some significant features in this new one, but I just came here to bitch about gold iPhones making the news. grrr.
posted by GospelofWesleyWillis at 7:19 PM on September 14


aubilenon: "There totally are ruggedized smartphones. For instance, Cat (as in Caterpillar) makes some."

I like how their designers clearly have a Battlestar Galactica fetish.
posted by signal at 7:44 PM on September 14 [2 favorites]




Does this mean the top of the screen will be less busy with information? I haven't seen screenshots that have all the little icons (the 'back to safari' to the left, for example, or bluetooth or location services to the right)...where will all that information go, with the notch?
posted by mittens at 4:56 AM on September 15


As the years pass, Apples design themes seem more and more about beauty, elegance, and monopolizing attention, and less and less about interaction and integration into the real world.
posted by ZeusHumms at 7:39 AM on September 15


After owning 2 iPhones and 2 Android phones, I'd like to point that Apple still hasn't figured out how to put a back button on iOS soft/hardware which is a definite deal breaker for me.
posted by signal at 8:21 AM on September 15 [2 favorites]


Apple’s iPhone X notch is an odd design choice

Longtime iOS developers are having to redesign apps to meet artificial design constraints that will make apps look and behave like garbage. Despite all the people who hate Steve Jobs, despite all the people who hate everything Apple does, despite all the people who hate everything Apple users use, and despite all the people who hate all Apple users for every first and last decision they ever make on this earth, even those same people would have to agree with Steven Paul Jobs, who would have never let that stupid, ugly notch ever get out of prototype.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 10:51 PM on September 15 [1 favorite]




The Jobs era of iPhone UI design was defined by photorealistic textures and glossy buttons everywhere which placed a massive burden on developers trying to make their apps fit the overall aesthetic of the OS. Changing a few margins around to fit the iPhone X is no burden at all in comparison.
posted by grahamparks at 2:40 AM on September 16 [1 favorite]


Clearly, the notch is just an homage to the other Apple notch.
posted by Chrysostom at 9:59 PM on September 16 [1 favorite]


Ehh. It really isn't, you know.

I routinely type in a file name exactly correctly and windows has no idea where it is. Windows search is appalling. I use Everything and it just finds shit for me, it's blissful.

i will say that Microsoft Office help is actually very good these days, after decades where it was worse than useless, so i presume there's hope.
posted by Sebmojo at 7:54 PM on September 17




Anyone who would line up for an iPhone at this point is probably waiting for the X.

It will be interesting how this strategy turns out though. It reminds me of the year they had the 5C and 5S. The 5C sold ok in the end, but it was vastly outsold by the 5S and also went on sale really fast at places like Best Buy. So if they actually end up supply constrained on OLED screens for the X they could be in for a rough year*.

(* - Rough meaning they sell a few percent less phones and the tech press acts like they're going out of business tomorrow)
posted by Gary at 2:35 PM on September 22


Well and from what I can tell you don't need to wait in line if you're on the iPhone Upgrade Program, you can just order one to be delivered and ship the old one back without spending an hour at the closest mall. I mean, sounds like a plan to me.

And yeah, although the 8 is getting good reviews, I really want the camera in the X almost more than anything else. If the regular 8 had the dual camera design that the 8 plus does it would be a harder call between the two. I mean _yes_ bigger screen in a not especially bigger device, that is nice, and oooh improved front facing camera capabilities and yay OLED display and whatnot, but mostly it's the traditional camera capabilities in the X for me.
posted by Kyol at 2:58 PM on September 22


https://www.tomsguide.com/us/iphone-8-benchmarks-fastest-phone,review-4676.html

Huh, apparently the chip in the iPhone Finger and iPhone Face is just stunningly, terrifyingly fast. And this is running off a phone battery — imagine what it could do without thermal or power constraints, given that it already runs faster than at least some modern MacBook Pro models, without even having a fan.

More importantly, perhaps… what’s up, Intel? What happened to you guys?
posted by DoctorFedora at 4:42 PM on September 22


Yeah, the Geekbench on the iPhone 8 is literally higher than the 2011 iMac I use to produce music, sometimes at 96kHz. The potential performance of this device is unreal.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:00 PM on September 22


I guess dropping 32-bit support paid off!
posted by aubilenon at 2:55 AM on September 23


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