On the way to the funeral, he delivered a pizza.
November 3, 2017 3:00 PM Subscribe
This post was deleted for the following reason: Poster's Request -- travelingthyme
This seems like the sort of thing that a few years ago my surly, loving-New-York self would have loved, but now it just pisses me off that a dickhole old white guy who is wholly unremarkable save for literally being a dick gets his own multi-page profile.
posted by knownassociate at 3:35 PM on November 3, 2017 [7 favorites]
posted by knownassociate at 3:35 PM on November 3, 2017 [7 favorites]
There used to be a place here in Austin called Virginia's. Virginia was the owner, proprietor, cook, waitress and scullion. The hours were irregular, especially if she had a doctor's appointment. Everything was cooked in cast iron, either on the stove top or in the oven. The choices were on a chalkboard. No substitutions. You ordered by writing on a small piece of paper with a golf pencil. She would pick it up when she had time. The service was glacial. The food was devine. And god help you if you complained about the wait. She would hand you a small map with directions to the nearest McDonalds. You might as well go because you weren't getting fed...
posted by jim in austin at 4:04 PM on November 3, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by jim in austin at 4:04 PM on November 3, 2017 [3 favorites]
Hmm. I haven't had this pizza yet. Now I'm curious...
Pizza vendettas and associated abrasiveness are definitely a thing in my part of the area too. The place I get pizza from, down the street from where I live, only I can go, because a family member has some kind of vendetta with the owner from back in the old days. That family member's father no longer lives here, but he grew up here, and he's the same way; he can't go to the pizza place down the street from where he lives on the East Coast now either, since they tried to upcharge him for some salad dressing once or whatever and he never got over it.
posted by limeonaire at 5:13 PM on November 3, 2017
Pizza vendettas and associated abrasiveness are definitely a thing in my part of the area too. The place I get pizza from, down the street from where I live, only I can go, because a family member has some kind of vendetta with the owner from back in the old days. That family member's father no longer lives here, but he grew up here, and he's the same way; he can't go to the pizza place down the street from where he lives on the East Coast now either, since they tried to upcharge him for some salad dressing once or whatever and he never got over it.
posted by limeonaire at 5:13 PM on November 3, 2017
Individuality is a varied and long, or short, life sentence.
posted by Oyéah at 5:42 PM on November 3, 2017
posted by Oyéah at 5:42 PM on November 3, 2017
I get the feeling that that neighborhood is on its way to gentrification. Articles like that aren't just about the person but the place, too. I liked the article and hey, shine on all you crazy diamonds. Shine on.
posted by jadepearl at 7:53 PM on November 3, 2017
posted by jadepearl at 7:53 PM on November 3, 2017
My neighborhood has had several of these guys and they only thrive if they have their own demented cheering squad. There was one who cussed me out for going in his shop to tell him one of his pets had wandered outside. "Oh, that's just his way of having fun with you!" I was told. Uh, being told "Go f-ck yourself!" when I told him his bird was loose outside is fun? No.
posted by lagomorphius at 8:25 PM on November 3, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by lagomorphius at 8:25 PM on November 3, 2017 [1 favorite]
I really can't stand people like that. Just can't stand 'em. There's enough ugly in the world right now.
posted by sarcasticah at 9:45 PM on November 3, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by sarcasticah at 9:45 PM on November 3, 2017 [2 favorites]
> a dickhole old white guy who is wholly unremarkable save for literally being a dick
And for making such great pizza that people are willing to put up with his dickishness. Don't forget that part.
posted by languagehat at 7:24 AM on November 4, 2017
And for making such great pizza that people are willing to put up with his dickishness. Don't forget that part.
posted by languagehat at 7:24 AM on November 4, 2017
My little southern town had a guy who would make a certain number of pizzas after the bars closed--you had to know his name to look him up in the white pages to place your order, but he was The Underground Pizza Guy to all of us. He delivered whatever he made that night with his best friend, a elderly German Shepard, riding shot gun, and whenever he'd parceled out the last of his admittedly sub-par pies, he just stopped answering the phone until the next night. Everyone knew of him, though not everyone could order--his real name and actual phone number were a jealously-held secret. The night-shift cops ordered often and any local officials who might otherwise be all over illegal pizza looked the other way. Then the local hipster magazine ran a fawning article about him and his beloved pup died and that was that. He retired and is remembered only to us oldsters and through t-shirts sold by the "pop-up" antique boutique in our downtown, which has dreams of gentrification. He gets nothing from the T-shirt sales.
posted by thebrokedown at 12:15 PM on November 4, 2017
posted by thebrokedown at 12:15 PM on November 4, 2017
The world would be a better place if more of us said "your pizza [movie/television show/software] is not worth putting up with you being an asshole." I know plenty of folks (restaurant owners, bar owners, etc.) who manage to have large personalities without being assholes.
posted by Lexica at 9:42 PM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Lexica at 9:42 PM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
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-- Author Kingsley Amis in Lucky Jim.
posted by Groundhog Week at 3:30 PM on November 3, 2017 [1 favorite]