Off to the vet!
November 6, 2017 5:16 PM   Subscribe

 
the decor in the vet's office 🙀
posted by exogenous at 5:36 PM on November 6


Can't believe the vet didn't do THE THERMOMETER =O.O=
posted by The otter lady at 5:53 PM on November 6 [7 favorites]


You have worked hard today.

Well, that's arguable, but I will take Simon's Cat whenever it is available, so thanks!
posted by turbid dahlia at 5:55 PM on November 6 [3 favorites]


Better a whole mouse than half a mouse.
posted by irisclara at 6:02 PM on November 6 [1 favorite]


Oh, man. I finally have a place to tell my new cat story.

So my housemate's cat has learned it can visit me to get away from the dogs, find a warm lap and even get treats . I even have some kibble on hand and I am totally her new favorite human and all that.

Well, over the past month said cat has become more relaxed and more of a bedhog and, y'know, that damn cat sometimes. She's also apparently ok with going out in the rain and snow so she's come in soaking wet and freezing cold a couple of times to happily jump into my bed to dry off on my feet.

She's also known hunter, unfortunately, but on the one hand she actually eats the moles and tree rats and stuff she catches. On the other hand she also catches birds, even hummingbirds, which is impressive for a 10-12 year old cat that I've never really seen move more than a leisurely saunter.

Well, the other night she woke me up from a really deep sleep by repeatedly pouncing on me, and then for some reason bolting away again. I wasn't having it so I ignored the cat and pretended to stay asleep. This happened a few more times until she was right over my head on my pillow, headbutting me and mewing at me in this weird way.

Until I heard a faint chirp pretty much right in my ear and face in the dark.

Chirp? Oh fuck no. You damn cat. I struggle to roll over and turn my bedside flashlight on, cat meows at me again with a "Yeah, I know you're awake now", pounces on my chest, tries to freakin' head butt me, deposits this poor sparrow right under my chin and meows at me proudly.

Bird flies off to the top of some shelves and a closed window, cat meows at me in annoyance, bolts after the bird, catches it, brings it back to my damn bed where I'm now sitting up and attempting to stand. Cat deposits the poor bird again, I wave off the cat, bird goes flying again, and cat goes after the bird. Well, apparently cat can move like a goddamn ninja and manages to leap straight up about 7 feet, catches the bird again and starts bringing it back. I scold cat, cat drops bird, bird flies off one more time. I stumble immediately over the outside door and open it as cat is encouraging me to catch it in the corner, poor sparrow bolts chirping "fuuuck fuck fuck fuck" the whole way and cat meows at me angrily and bolts out the door after the bird.

Five minutes later cat comes back (empty mouthed, thankfully) and meows and chatters at me in irritation a few times. Then demands to be fed. I mean, obviously, only part of the bird was mine. As if I even deserve a whole one.

I have also seen this damn cat pounce on and happily eat giant PNW house spiders like they're some kind of rare delicacy, so I'm now a lot more wary when she jumps into my bed in the middle of a night. I'm really, really hoping they're just too good to share, because omg cat why no stop.
posted by loquacious at 6:26 PM on November 6 [46 favorites]


I know that PNW house spiders are our beautiful spider friends, but if I had a cat who liked to munch on them as a nighttime snack, I would not complain.
posted by spinifex23 at 7:11 PM on November 6 [3 favorites]


Simon’s Cat videos make me very, very happy, always.
posted by Melismata at 7:22 PM on November 6 [3 favorites]


I know that PNW house spiders are our beautiful spider friends, but if I had a cat who liked to munch on them as a nighttime snack, I would not complain.

(SPIDER TRIGGER WARNING SKIP AHEAD)

I'm in full agreement with you. They're gorgeous and I've even held them and what not. But I've found a couple of those monsters on my pillow. The first time I saw a really big one I thought it was a plastic toy until it moved like a rocket propelled slot car on a twisty track, and even then I questioned physics and reality.

I had one under the blankets once on my bare shoulder that was big enough to wake me up... because I thought it was a frickin' mouse or something. It felt everything like when I used to have pet rats and they'd get out of the cage and wake me up.

I was all calmly mammalist as I lifted the edge of my covers to peer back over my shoulder as I lay on my stomach. As soon as it was uncovered enough for me to see what it was and gasp it then lunged at me and ran over my face to escape the covers. Oh, the screaming and thrashing. Oh dear.

I just don't want to be offered a live one. Or a dead one, really. So, yeah, have at 'em, cat. Next on Marty Stouffer's Wild America.

Speaking of which, here's that cat. Hi cat.
posted by loquacious at 8:16 PM on November 6 [12 favorites]


This will unseat 3D GCI as the animation standard. And about goddamn time.
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:29 PM on November 6 [1 favorite]


Loquacious -- cat tax, please.
Also... I'm laughing so hard I'm crying. Cats be weird.
posted by TrishaU at 10:47 PM on November 6


Y'all are reminding me of my Oregon childhood bedroom and feeling wiggles in my feet on the way to school, checking my shoes and finding LARGE SPIDER staring at me. Also putting on jeans, getting tickled and then hearing the plop of a spider on the ground from a leg.

You know the horror movie shower scenes? Nothing when you've grown up with spiders the size of the palm of your hand hanging out in your bath towel. Which of course you discover after taking your shower.

I love spiders, enjoy looking at them outdoors, and refuse to use insecticide because I'd rather they and bats and house centipedes enjoy feasting, but when they're on you? Eeeek.

New kitten enjoys scronching them too. Black ninja kitty who passed away a few months ago was our fly-catcher. Miss tortie kitten prefers arachnids and caddisflies, which I didn't know we had in our area until she started presenting me with them. She has found larger, furrier arachnids than I knew were around too.

The only mammal my pointy-teethed, razor-clawed carnivores have ever presented to me was a bat a few years ago. It was okay, only a small puncture wound to one of its wings. It recovered enough to fly away, thank goodness.
posted by fraula at 1:46 AM on November 7


PNW House Spider — translation, please? (I'm having an acronym fail over "PNW".)
posted by cstross at 4:03 AM on November 7


I'm pretty sure PNW means Pacific Northwest, as in Oregon and Washington states. Maybe parts of northern California? This doesn't seem the place to get into it anyway. Spiders of Washington state

I always thought that the whole "gently opening your eyelid with a claw" thing was an exaggeration until it happened to me. Fortunately our cats are better behaved lately. One even manages to catch me at what feels like the perfect time in my sleep cycle to get up for the morning and gently wakes me up with furry snuggles which is pretty nice actually.
posted by exogenous at 4:37 AM on November 7


Ah, wasn't thinking in terms of US geography. Yeah, that'd be a sudden awakening experience all right (although perhaps not as bad as finding a camel spider in your sleeping bag.

Eyelid/claw is best treated as an application for feline flight school, in my books. Luckily none of my cats ever did it more than once. (Although a close second is waking the food ape by licking their eyebrows.)
posted by cstross at 4:55 AM on November 7


Yeah, that'd be a sudden awakening experience all right (although perhaps not as bad as finding a camel spider in your sleeping bag.

Heh, I used to live in a desert and my cat would bring home vinegaroons and scorpions. And then eat them. Thankfully.

Same cat used to bat at my eyes when I had REM sleep. What the hell, cat?
posted by loquacious at 5:46 AM on November 7


Eyelid/claw is best treated as an application for feline flight school, in my books. Luckily none of my cats ever did it more than once. (Although a close second is waking the food ape by licking their eyebrows.)

When I lived in a small apartment, the only place for the litterbox was a corner of my bedroom. My cat would routinely use his box in the middle of the night, jump immediately onto my bed, and paw at my lips. That, and the sound of him beginning to hork on the bedcovers, are the only two things that can wake me immediately from a sound sleep.
posted by zebra at 6:34 AM on November 7 [4 favorites]


Thank you for the reminder to visit Simon and his cat. Good things do exist.
posted by mightshould at 6:24 PM on November 8


A cartoon about a cat engaging in cat behaviour for 12 minutes! Funniest thing evar.

This is exactly like a day in my life. Even his house looks like mine (albeit with a bigger kitchen).
posted by tel3path at 12:38 AM on November 9


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