"Oh, it was such a hell of a smelly, noisy one"
January 20, 2018 9:01 PM Subscribe
Tired of the sanitised, filtered, and happy depictions of the everyday lives of her friends and family on social media, Kaviya wanted to talk about things and issues that not many like to discuss or even acknowledge in public. So, much in the vein of #100DaysOfHappiness and #100DaysOfExercise, the Mumbai-based artist decided to take up her own 100-day challenge on Instagram; but hers is #100DaysOfDirtyLaundry [all links NSFW, probably].
I think I may have just found my sufficiently-cynical muse.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:25 PM on January 20, 2018
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:25 PM on January 20, 2018
Confirmation bias: makes one actively seek out information that confirms one's pre-existing beliefs.
Well, hell. Did I just fall into one of those darn cognitive traps? Who can tell anymore
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:30 PM on January 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
Well, hell. Did I just fall into one of those darn cognitive traps? Who can tell anymore
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:30 PM on January 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
What a pickup for my Sunday morning blues. Love this line: On the contrary, accept mediocrity, that you are pretty average, it's a lollipop you'll lick forever, forgetting ambitions.
posted by perrouno at 1:39 AM on January 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by perrouno at 1:39 AM on January 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
Day 63 - The high and the hangover
Every single post online is a snazzed up variation of the call (cry?) "Acknowlege me. Validate me. Like me", no? . . . But isn't that true of real life as well?
Yes.
posted by I_Love_Bananas at 3:38 AM on January 21, 2018
Every single post online is a snazzed up variation of the call (cry?) "Acknowlege me. Validate me. Like me", no? . . . But isn't that true of real life as well?
Yes.
posted by I_Love_Bananas at 3:38 AM on January 21, 2018
eh. my friends selfie when they think they look good or share their fancy cocktails, but they also Instagram pictures of themselves looking stupid or tweet about stripping on their own two feet or something way more like the "acknowledge me and validate me" than the "sanitized, perfect, i'm always winning" criticism hurled at social media and our interactions on it. I mean, my friends fart and I know they fart. But when we're sitting in a bar together and one of them farts, no-one shouts "Hey! I just farted!" The fact that they're not logging it on Twitter either is not presenting a false face--it's just mirroring how life works. We accept one another--farts and all--as friends, but we broadcast the significant bits--triumph or tragedy--and we cultivate the moments/photos/ticket stubs that create the borders of who we want to be.
I don't think the central tension of social media is the "false face" one--the "I'm Perfect Everything I have is Luxe" vs. "We're all average and ordinary and sometimes untidy"disconnect--that articles like this posit as the central tension. I think the central tension is false intimacy or misapprehension of connection. More "social media is great as a circle of people you already know" vs the belief is will bring you intimacy with strangers you admire.
This second tension is way more complicated than the perfect vs real tension because all of us have met people through social media we became close to. Many of us are isolated by where we live or demands on our time/emotions or illness or other factors and manage to make real connections via social media. But there's a huge swath in the middle of truly shallow interaction. Interaction which is more like being friendly with the clerk who is always at the Walgreens when you stop in for milk because you ran out than it is like getting to know the person who sits next to you in class.
In both cases, you notice if the person has a new hairstyle or has been absent for a while and is back. You may remark on it with some level of genuine interest. In one case, it's not going to generate intimacy and in the other, it might. We assume, on social media, that all moments of connection are supposed to lead to bonds. That's misguided.
So we begin to criticize social media, and the things people present there, as false. As curated lies about who they are and how they live. It's not, frankly. It's normal social gatekeeping. Ain't nothing wrong with that.
posted by crush at 8:29 AM on January 21, 2018 [12 favorites]
I don't think the central tension of social media is the "false face" one--the "I'm Perfect Everything I have is Luxe" vs. "We're all average and ordinary and sometimes untidy"disconnect--that articles like this posit as the central tension. I think the central tension is false intimacy or misapprehension of connection. More "social media is great as a circle of people you already know" vs the belief is will bring you intimacy with strangers you admire.
This second tension is way more complicated than the perfect vs real tension because all of us have met people through social media we became close to. Many of us are isolated by where we live or demands on our time/emotions or illness or other factors and manage to make real connections via social media. But there's a huge swath in the middle of truly shallow interaction. Interaction which is more like being friendly with the clerk who is always at the Walgreens when you stop in for milk because you ran out than it is like getting to know the person who sits next to you in class.
In both cases, you notice if the person has a new hairstyle or has been absent for a while and is back. You may remark on it with some level of genuine interest. In one case, it's not going to generate intimacy and in the other, it might. We assume, on social media, that all moments of connection are supposed to lead to bonds. That's misguided.
So we begin to criticize social media, and the things people present there, as false. As curated lies about who they are and how they live. It's not, frankly. It's normal social gatekeeping. Ain't nothing wrong with that.
posted by crush at 8:29 AM on January 21, 2018 [12 favorites]
Fwiw, I definitely have friends who use Facebook and Instagram to present their lives as sanitized and luxurious, a game that I long ago decided I could only win by not playing.
I appreciate the fact that I have pretty good offline friendships with those folks, even though my online modality is more "all farts, all the time."
posted by evidenceofabsence at 8:46 AM on January 21, 2018
I appreciate the fact that I have pretty good offline friendships with those folks, even though my online modality is more "all farts, all the time."
posted by evidenceofabsence at 8:46 AM on January 21, 2018
A+ review crush. Please subscribe me to your newsletter.
posted by tirutiru at 10:32 AM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by tirutiru at 10:32 AM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
This woman is awesome!
posted by supermedusa at 7:00 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by supermedusa at 7:00 PM on January 21, 2018
« Older As gouda drum solo as possible | Something's Happening at Tagruato.JP Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
And farts.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 9:48 PM on January 20, 2018 [1 favorite]