Anyone want some foot tacos?
June 14, 2018 5:05 AM   Subscribe

Warning: Consensual Cannibalism "Three weeks after his accident, our anonymous redditor invited his friends for a meal: On Sunday, July 10, 2016, three weeks after the accident, Shiny, who prefers to remain anonymous, invited 10 of his most open-minded friends to a special brunch..."

"They ate apple strudel, quiche puff pastries, fruit tarts, and chocolate cake. They drank gin lemonade punches and mimosas. And then the main course came out: fajita tacos made from Shiny’s severed human limb."
posted by starlybri (124 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite
 
fajita tacos made from Shiny’s severed human limb

now, I thought a fajita was a different thing than a taco
posted by thelonius at 5:09 AM on June 14, 2018 [34 favorites]


Maybe it's because they had onions and peppers?
posted by starlybri at 5:12 AM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


There's not a lot of meat on a foot, so you have to stretch it with some onions and bell peppers.

(Dammit, starlybri.)
posted by Faint of Butt at 5:12 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


"Mmmm love this cheese ..."

"I didn't put any cheese on it."
posted by GallonOfAlan at 5:13 AM on June 14, 2018 [17 favorites]


I would have served foot-long hot dogs.
posted by chavenet at 5:15 AM on June 14, 2018 [20 favorites]


I’d have tried it.
posted by SansPoint at 5:17 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


"There’s no law against cannibalism in the United States, except in Idaho."
There's got to be a story there.
posted by doctornemo at 5:21 AM on June 14, 2018 [33 favorites]


Well technically you make tacos from fajitas, but it does seem like only a heel would actually call them “fajita tacos”.
posted by nikaspark at 5:22 AM on June 14, 2018 [16 favorites]


I didn't think reading this would make me heave, but here I am, heaving a little bit. I mean, it's just meat, but ... I don't know.

(Also probably they should have stewed it instead, made carne guisada or something if they wanted to go tex-mex.)

(Also also fajita "technically" refers to the cut of beef, the skirt steak... which is the diaphgram, which in itself is a little bit grody.)
posted by uncleozzy at 5:30 AM on June 14, 2018 [7 favorites]


only a heel

(ಠ_ಠ)
posted by inire at 5:32 AM on June 14, 2018 [30 favorites]


damnit I am on my fourth re-watch of Hannibal and texting a friend about how mental comfort food for me is cannibals in love, and this comes up?

metafilter out of my brain! no brain soup for you!
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 5:36 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


this is part of the new donner menu at taco bell, right?
posted by pyramid termite at 5:45 AM on June 14, 2018 [23 favorites]


Not sure I'd eat something that had been sat in a bucket of formalin for a month, but each to their own.
posted by pipeski at 5:46 AM on June 14, 2018 [5 favorites]


That was a different foot. This foot was just frozen.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:48 AM on June 14, 2018


I would've made Donner Kebabs.
posted by slogger at 6:08 AM on June 14, 2018 [64 favorites]


the only thing that nauseates me about this thread is all the shitty puns
posted by Bwentman at 6:11 AM on June 14, 2018 [8 favorites]


Mmmmm, foot-jitas.....
posted by dr_dank at 6:15 AM on June 14, 2018 [8 favorites]




So why on earth didn't he serve sourtoe cocktails to go with the tacos? Missed opportunity.
posted by ian1977 at 6:22 AM on June 14, 2018 [5 favorites]


Because of course Reddit
posted by 4ster at 6:27 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


I had a vegan friend who liked to remind people that he was vegan "except for consensual cannibalism," which he considered morally consistent with veganism. That conversion then, if I recall, led to discussion of Armin Meiwes (Google at your own risk). I'm certain my friend would not have partaken in Meiwes-style cannibalism, but a taste of a friend's foot? I bet!
posted by the_blizz at 6:35 AM on June 14, 2018 [5 favorites]


You promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one severed foot on my taco. Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?

The Lord replied, "What?
posted by Floydd at 6:38 AM on June 14, 2018 [66 favorites]


...Also also fajita "technically" refers to the cut of beef...

Yes, I took liberties with the facts in order to make a bad pun. Apologies for putting my foot into my mouth.
posted by nikaspark at 6:38 AM on June 14, 2018 [12 favorites]


sock tacos
posted by ian1977 at 6:39 AM on June 14, 2018


There’s no law against cannibalism in the United States

Spoiler alert.
posted by CynicalKnight at 6:42 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


So I admit I skimmed a little, being susceptible myself to a bit of the involuntary squickles, but -- "healthy and ethical"? Isn't there a disease transmission risk associated with eating conspecifics? (Actual question.)
posted by inconstant at 6:50 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


I have no problem biting off and swallowing those little pieces of skin that get detached around my fingernails. I bet lots of people do that. So it's a spectrum.
posted by Vesihiisi at 6:52 AM on June 14, 2018 [22 favorites]


Everything about this story is f***ing peak Reddit.
posted by JamesBay at 6:52 AM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


this is part of the new donner menu at taco bell, right?

More like the new donor menu, amirite?

There's got to be a story there.

There is.
posted by Paul Slade at 6:53 AM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


Idk, I would eat human, but I'd rather have something meatier and more well-marbled than foot.
posted by The otter lady at 6:59 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


Cannibalism may not be illegal (except in Idaho! Be sure to remember that just in case!) but there are a lot of rules and regulations regarding biomedical waste. I can’t imagine my hospital giving someone their amputated limb without a lot of meetings and discussions with risk management.

Did this remind any other internet old-timers of Paul “Freck” Morgan, of cutoffmyfeet.com? (Link goes to news story as cutoffmyfeet.com is now sadly defunct.)
posted by TedW at 7:01 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


From Paul Slade’s link above: In Idaho, anthropophagy (called cannibalism by statute) is illegal. The statute makes it an offense to drink human blood or consume human flesh, punishable by up to fourteen years in prison.

Clearly driven by a Mormon backlash against Catholicism
posted by TedW at 7:06 AM on June 14, 2018 [15 favorites]


Keeping your amputated limb does indeed appear to be perfectly legal.
posted by tiger tiger at 7:07 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


[donor kebab joke]
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 7:12 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


Being too serious and political about this, I know, but I think class and race issues would come into play here. Friends of mine who are POC (black and Asian, mostly) and white professionals (teachers, doctors, accountants, musicians, engineers, surveyors, etc.) would respond with disgust to an invitation to dine on human flesh, I'm pretty sure. I would.
posted by kozad at 7:15 AM on June 14, 2018


Caveat Lecter.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 7:27 AM on June 14, 2018 [13 favorites]



Being too serious and political about this, I know, but I think class and race issues would come into play here. Friends of mine who are POC (black and Asian, mostly) and white professionals (teachers, doctors, accountants, musicians, engineers, surveyors, etc.) would respond with disgust to an invitation to dine on human flesh, I'm pretty sure. I would.


I... think it's probably not a super popular social invitation across the board.
posted by geegollygosh at 7:32 AM on June 14, 2018 [33 favorites]


I belong to one of these groups, and I would find it rather exciting.
posted by Vesihiisi at 7:34 AM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


People are being pretty damn arch in this thread.
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:35 AM on June 14, 2018 [8 favorites]


kinda puts a new meaning on going to get burgers at the "Golden Arches" huh, GenjiandProust?
posted by nikaspark at 7:37 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


It’s fucked up, but what grosses me out more than eating Person, is eating the flesh of something that is still living. Like, I’d probably try whole-roasted Person because that has clearly crossed the line that separates living thing and food, but I’d still feel weird about eating the amputed leg of a lamb that’s still out there stumbling around the yard. Albeit a little less weird than eating human foot.

Also, I’m a little weirded out by eating something that consented to be eaten. FOOD DOES NOT CONSENT TO BEING EATED.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:38 AM on June 14, 2018 [8 favorites]


People are being pretty damn arch in this thread.

I know, it's incredibly defeating.
posted by loquacious at 7:38 AM on June 14, 2018 [16 favorites]


this is part of the new donner menu at taco bell, right?

Run Lurch to the Border!
posted by Celsius1414 at 7:39 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


Also, I’m a little weirded out by eating something that consented to be eaten. FOOD DOES NOT CONSENT TO BEING EATED.

I ask my avocados for consent every time. They usually say yes. The few that don't get turned into guacamole while the others watch.
posted by loquacious at 7:40 AM on June 14, 2018 [15 favorites]


People are being pretty damn arch in this thread.

I wish people would at least try to toe the line of MetaFilter's rules of… thumb SORRY, sorry, I blew it
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 7:41 AM on June 14, 2018 [16 favorites]


"There’s no law against cannibalism in the United States, except in Idaho."
There's got to be a story there.


When your state fish is the frickin' Cutthroat Trout, cannibalism is pretty well passé.
posted by Celsius1414 at 7:42 AM on June 14, 2018


I’d probably try whole-roasted Person

I mean, only if it was ethically raised, I’m not a monster.

posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:42 AM on June 14, 2018 [9 favorites]


I started reading this and got worried because my former neighbor also lost his foot in a horrific motorcycle accident but as I kept reading it became obvious it wasn't the same guy.

I've often wondered if you had a limb amputated and wanted to keep it, would they let you. I mean... it's yours, isn't it? I would probably ask to keep anything of mine that was removed. Not sure I'd eat it though.

I think I would have partaken in this meal. I'm not religious at all, I believe meat is meat and if you're ok with eating a cow you should be ok with eating a dog (but maybe not, you know, your neighbor's dog) or a horse or... sure, why not, a human. As long as it's legal and ethical (assuming you feel eating meat is ethical) where you are.
posted by bondcliff at 7:42 AM on June 14, 2018


It's super strange that people are weirded out more by consent than by the idea that it's human flesh. Like, (relatively) lots of people will eat a human placenta, but that's actually part of the baby and consent can't be granted. But a foot that is clearly part of a person who is capable of making decisions about the disposition of their limbs? Suddenly it's so creepy.

One of the interesting things about kidney transplants is that in general they don't remove the old kidney; they just stitch in another one. If they did remove the kidneys, I'm wondering if there'd be a whole underground dining scene around it.
posted by phooky at 7:44 AM on June 14, 2018


I don't have ten friends that I can get to all join me at a regular normal restaurant

For my birthday
posted by penduluum at 7:45 AM on June 14, 2018 [54 favorites]


For my birthday

Did you offer to foot the bill?
posted by Celsius1414 at 7:47 AM on June 14, 2018 [65 favorites]


"There’s no law against cannibalism in the United States, except in Idaho."
There's got to be a story there.


The potato state might know something.
posted by Brian B. at 7:49 AM on June 14, 2018


... but where does it all end...
posted by jkaczor at 7:49 AM on June 14, 2018


I dunno. I stopped reading in the first paragraph when he said "I recognize that pineapple on pizza is a legitimate culinary decision to make." After that, anything is possible.
posted by ubiquity at 7:53 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


Friends of mine who are POC (black and Asian, mostly) and white professionals (teachers, doctors, accountants, musicians, engineers, surveyors, etc.) would respond with disgust to an invitation to dine on human flesh

In Asia, it's not uncommon to eat placentas (like the redditor mentioned), to the point of there being quite a number of placenta encapsulation companies (and, until goverments enacted restrictions - people selling placentas). I think any culture that practices some form of TCM has normalized or at least accepted placenta-eating to some degree.
posted by aielen at 8:08 AM on June 14, 2018


In Asia, it's not uncommon to eat placentas

Is there a citation for this? Because it could also be said that "it's not uncommon for the Kardashians to eat placentas."
posted by JamesBay at 8:12 AM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


So I was once totally inspired by the idea that my friends and family should eat me after I die. I pictured it like being incorporated into them, being a part of them forever. It was a really beautiful thought.

Then I learned about prions and Kuru, and how HIV likely mutated from SIV that was acquired by humans by eating apes, which are so closely related to us ...

and I realised that eating closely related species or your own species is just a really, really bad idea, healthwise. (This was much more convincing to me than than 'ewww, yuck!' argument).
posted by jb at 8:15 AM on June 14, 2018 [7 favorites]


...and the farmer says "You don't eat a Redditor like all at once."
posted by MarchHare at 8:16 AM on June 14, 2018 [20 favorites]


Yeah no thanks. This little piggy went "eww eww eww" all the way home.
posted by duffell at 8:17 AM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


Huh. Fifteen years ago one of the other bar regulars posed this situation (yes it was near closing time, why do you ask?). I recall saying I would partake, based on consent and that if this were to happen, the amputee would likely appreciate the show of comradery.

But it was a hypothetical. A real-life example just makes it more fraught.
posted by notsnot at 8:17 AM on June 14, 2018


I’d still feel weird about eating the amputed leg of a lamb that’s still out there stumbling around the yard.

You've reminded me of an old joke.

Mike's car breaks down in the middle of nowhere and he asks for help at a nearby farm. The family couldn't be nicer: they use their tractor to tow his car into their yard and arrange for a local mechanic to come out and fix it next day. They make up a bed for Mike in the spare room and insist he eat with them that evening.

After a hearty home-cooked meal, the farmer takes Mike for a walk round his property. Heading back to the house, they sees a pig with a wooden leg making its way through the yard. "What happened to that little guy?" Mike asks.

"Aww, that's Billy," the farmer replies. "Damnedest thing. We had a fire here a year or two back when the whole family was asleep. Billy ran inside when saw the smoke, rattled his hooves on the bedroom door and woke me and the missus up before the fire could get to us. Then he ran through the flames to the nursery, grabbed the baby's smock in his mouth and dragged her out to where she was safe in the yard."

"That's quite a story," says Mike. "And I suppose Billy lost his leg from the wounds he got in the fire?"

"No, it weren't that," the farmer replied, leaning down to tickle Billy behind the ear. "He got out of the fire just fine. But Billy's courage and heart saved all our lives that night, mister. And you don't eat a pig like that all at once."

Edit: WhileI was writing this, MarchHare beat me to it with the punchline. Still, maybe there'll be some people who don't know the whole thing...
posted by Paul Slade at 8:25 AM on June 14, 2018 [14 favorites]


Also, I’m a little weirded out by eating something that consented to be eaten. FOOD DOES NOT CONSENT TO BEING EATED.
posted by Slarty Bartfast


Shmoo sure about that?
posted by Splunge at 8:33 AM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


where is the previously link to the paid penis feast post
posted by poffin boffin at 8:36 AM on June 14, 2018


if you're going to be eponysterical, at least link the right bit
posted by delfin at 8:36 AM on June 14, 2018


One of the interesting things about kidney transplants is that in general they don't remove the old kidney; they just stitch in another one.
....what does the old one do?
posted by inconstant at 8:43 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


it's best
posted by poffin boffin at 8:51 AM on June 14, 2018 [15 favorites]


And you don't eat a pig like that all at once

Buddy Hackett! That’s my dad’s favorite joke, and one of my favorites too. Immediately came to mind.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 8:52 AM on June 14, 2018


...what does the old one DO?

Paperwork, mostly.
posted by delfin at 8:54 AM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


So I guess this might be an uncommon thought to have, but:

If I was going to be one of the few people around to have eaten human flesh, I wouldn't want to be having it in a highly-spiced form of fajitas/tacos. I'd want to know what it really tastes like. Otherwise, what's the point?
posted by Gordafarin at 9:02 AM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


In Asia, it's not uncommon to eat placentas

Is there a citation for this?


Not a citation but, TV commercials for placenta capsules run frequently during the day here in Japan. Alas, they’re not sourced from humans, but from the finest Danish sows.
(Or, at least the brand I’ve seen enough to remember the on-screen fine print is)

Always makes me think of baby frogs and lark’s vomit.
posted by AxelT at 9:04 AM on June 14, 2018


What a choice to make: eat your own leg or have an authentic leg lamp.

I do know that if I can’t eat my body part I very much want it taxidermied and mounted.
posted by LizBoBiz at 9:09 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


May I say, with the others, damn you MarchHare for beating us to the punchline.

That's thinking on your feet though, I must say...
posted by randomkeystrike at 9:14 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


I used to Internet-know a trans woman who ate her testicles after having an orchidectomy - there were plenty of photos. Fried in butter, neatly halved and served on toast. Yes, she was also a redditor.
posted by Dysk at 9:16 AM on June 14, 2018 [11 favorites]


Is there a citation for this? Because it could also be said that "it's not uncommon for the Kardashians to eat placentas."

Google's your friend. (First link that comes up in a search is this, there's also this, this, this etc, and not counting all the many non-English links that would not appear on English searches. Or the Asia-based mom/pregnancy discussion boards where people trade placenta-preservation advice and recipes.)

Like I said, this practice/belief was transmitted through TCM and dates back centuries, so it's not really weird to people who subscribe to TCM ideas. The encapsulation trend is a modernized version/interpretation of TCM beliefs, and may perhaps have encouraged more people (especially the younger generation) to carry on or re-adopt this practice*. Some people say the placenta is less potent if you eat it in pill form, though. (Broadly speaking - encapsulation has been around for decades (i.e. the Kardashians did not invent this for us), and I believe it's part of the wider progression of modernizing TCM and making it more convenient/congruous with modern Asian lifestyles - many other Chinese herbal medicines are also available in pill form where previously (like maybe 2 generations ago) they were only available as herb packets that you needed to boil/brew manually, etc.) I think the placenta-smoothie trend comes from the West though. The cooking method (or rather lack thereof) just doesn't seem inline with the TCM beliefs I know (method is too "yin" I think); I could be wrong though.

I'm Asian, grew up in Asia, my friends who have given birth where I'm from have all had the option of preserving their placentas, a number of them chose to do that and ate their placentas. Not unusual to go over to a friend's house after her delivery and see her placenta in the freezer/fridge. If I ever produce a viable placenta, I intend to eat it too.


*That this practice was re-adopted by some, or faced a dip then resurgence in popularity has a lot to do with the interplay between influences from Western colonialism/imperialism and TCM beliefs - but it's always been there in the culture, and part of a wider historical narrative of colonialism/postcolonialism/imperialism in Asia and the ever-ongoing debate of what it means to "modernize" on Asian terms, etc. I guess for this stuff academic journals (instead of Google) may be your friend.
posted by aielen at 9:27 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


I do know that if I can’t eat my body part I very much want it taxidermied and mounted.

My uncle wanted to put his amputated ankle joint on the top of a cane. He took it to a friend who keeps flesh-eating insects for cleaning bones, but his friend said no because he was worried there would be antibiotics in the flesh that would kill the insects (which are apparently very, very expensive).
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 9:31 AM on June 14, 2018 [5 favorites]


I used to Internet-know a trans woman who ate her testicles after having an orchidectomy - there were plenty of photos. Fried in butter, neatly halved and served on toast.

OH HELL THE FUCK NOPE

Well, I'm definitely no where even remotely close as weird as I think I am. GAAAHHHH.

Come on, lady, you just got them out, why are you putting them back in, oh why!?
posted by loquacious at 9:32 AM on June 14, 2018 [11 favorites]


AND I JUST WANT TO ANNOUNCE I AM OFFICIALLY DONE WITH THE INTERNET FOR TODAY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN YEARS AND IT'S BARELY 9 AM. WELL DONE, DYSK. GAAAAAAGH.
posted by loquacious at 9:35 AM on June 14, 2018 [10 favorites]


You'll be glad to hear that I no longer have the photos, then.
posted by Dysk at 9:37 AM on June 14, 2018 [7 favorites]


some of us are disappointed now
posted by sciatrix at 9:39 AM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


(Though a decent Google will find similar photos from a different individual)
posted by Dysk at 9:39 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


if you're not slow-roasting your severed testicles, you aren't doing them culinary justice.
posted by delfin at 9:48 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


Food does not consent to being eaten, Slarty? But what about the Dish of the Day?
posted by runincircles at 9:56 AM on June 14, 2018 [5 favorites]


It was a really beautiful thought.

This is exactly why I wish to be buried in a hessian bag, standing up in a posthole, with an apricot tree planted on the mound. I've long enjoyed the thought of being reincarnated as apricots.
posted by flabdablet at 10:06 AM on June 14, 2018 [5 favorites]


Es ist mein toe (Nein)
posted by Query at 10:09 AM on June 14, 2018


doctornemo, I have no idea. Maybe Idaho is working overtime on their "We're not Colorado" stance. Colorado, of course, has a beloved (if unofficial) State Cannibal named Alferd Packer.
posted by queensissy at 10:39 AM on June 14, 2018


fajita tacos made from Shiny’s severed human limb

Ah! Sonoran style!
posted by Thorzdad at 11:07 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


....what does the old one do?

Nothing except not leave a kidney-shaped hole which has to heal up. Apparently surgical recovery is much easier if you're doing less cutting. <end derail>

posted by phooky at 12:22 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


I used to Internet-know a trans woman who ate her testicles after having an orchidectomy - there were plenty of photos.

Somehow I'm more grossed out by these pictures than I was by those. Something about how much these are just like, meat chunks.
posted by vibratory manner of working at 12:42 PM on June 14, 2018


Well, most of the obvious and not-so-obvious jokes have already been made, so let me throw this out: "If you are what you eat, then I haven't changed a bit." Can anyone else source it without Googling?
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:49 PM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


This seems to be lose-lose.

If you don't taste very good, then your friends and acquaintances have just had an unsatisfactory meal.

But does anyone here really want their friends and acquaintances to discover that they're extraordinarily delicious?
posted by sebastienbailard at 1:43 PM on June 14, 2018 [15 favorites]


I like to thing that I‘d eat anything dead and non-slimy. But I‘m really not sure how I‘d react to human meat.
Like, I‘m really really curious, but also there‘s a real barrier there.
posted by Omnomnom at 1:46 PM on June 14, 2018


I didn't think I had much of a taboo about this (thanks to Hannibal) until I read all the comments here and discovered that I'm actually quite squeamish. Thanks for the self-knowledge, Metafilter!
posted by grandiloquiet at 1:56 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


I hate lime so much that I find that aspect of their dish almost as disturbing as the human flesh aspect. Lol.
posted by Social Science Nerd at 2:36 PM on June 14, 2018


I am reminded of the cow from Douglas Adams’ Restaurant at the End of the Universe.
posted by Big Al 8000 at 2:39 PM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


I mean I'd eat manflesh sure but I wouldn't start with a foot.
posted by turbid dahlia at 2:50 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


Every time I starting really believing I’m a pacifist I read something like this and I have the urge to slap some sense into some people. It does seem to involve reddit more often than not. Like, just what is wrong with these people? Bad parenting I guess.
posted by freecellwizard at 2:54 PM on June 14, 2018


Anyone here read Survivor Type by Stephen King?

Of Survivor Type, King says: "As far as short stories are concerned, I like the grisly ones the best. However, the story "Survivor Type" goes a little bit too far, even for me."
posted by Splunge at 3:05 PM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


Keeping your amputated limb does indeed appear to be perfectly legal.

Nobody tell David Sedaris about this, he might get ideas.
posted by jenfullmoon at 3:26 PM on June 14, 2018


What did Sherlock Holmes say when investigating the Case Of The Mysterious Severed Leg?

"Watson, the game is a foot!"
posted by Quackles at 4:40 PM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


I used to Internet-know a trans woman who ate her testicles after having an orchidectomy - there were plenty of photos. Fried in butter, neatly halved and served on toast.
OH HELL THE FUCK NOPE

Well, I'm definitely no where even remotely close as weird as I think I am. GAAAHHHH.

Come on, lady, you just got them out, why are you putting them back in, oh why!?
I was considering having mine launched into space JUST TO GET THEM AS FAR AWAY FROM ME AS POSSIBLE, but it turns out doing that is really fucking expensive.
posted by nebulawindphone at 4:53 PM on June 14, 2018 [9 favorites]


Gordafarin: If I was going to be one of the few people around to have eaten human flesh, I wouldn't want to be having it in a highly-spiced form of fajitas/tacos. I'd want to know what it really tastes like. Otherwise, what's the point?

Me too. I've always wondered since reading about Wendigos in undergrad -- Wendigo being an Algonquian word for spirit-possessed cannibals -- If I remember correctly, many of them may have started out eating human flesh only because of desperate starvation during a bleak Canadian winter, but a cultural understanding held by many First Nations groups was that a Wendigo kept on eating human flesh because supposedly they found it so much tastier than other kinds. Here's one historical example that Canada prosecuted.

Canadian law doesn't mention cannibalism by name but it seems to me that this effectively outlaws it: "every one who . . . improperly or indecently interferes with or offers any indignity to a dead human body or human remains, whether buried or not, is guilty of an indictable offence and liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding five years."

(Wikipedia on Wendigo as concept or metaphor: "In addition to denoting a cannibalistic monster from their traditional folklore, Native Americans also understand the wendigo conceptually. As a concept, the wendigo can apply to any person, idea, or movement infected by a corrosive drive toward self-aggrandizing greed and excessive consumption, traits that sow disharmony and destruction if left unchecked." hmmm this suits 45 exactly...)
posted by cybercoitus interruptus at 5:59 PM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


Previous discussions of ethical cannibalism on Metafilter.
posted by MarchHare at 6:41 PM on June 14, 2018


"Watson, the game is a foot!"

Surely, "Watson, the foot is gamy!"
posted by MikeKD at 6:46 PM on June 14, 2018 [5 favorites]


I'm familiar with Wendigos through the Marvel Comics version, which is a big white-furred critter with Hulk-level strength. In fact, Wolverine's first appearance is basically a big three-way fight between him, the Hulk, and "Wendy." Looking at Wendy's Wikipedia entry, we get this tidbit: "The Wendigo makes another appearance in the MC2 imprint of Marvel Comics, an alternate future featuring, among others, the children of existing Marvel superheroes. In an issue of Wild Thing, Hulk, Doctor Strange, Wolverine, and Wolverine's daughter Wild Thing encounter a large number of Wendigos, which turn out to be a lost cub scout troop that had eaten its scoutmaster." Uh... OK, then.
posted by Halloween Jack at 7:29 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


It appears that the consumed flesh was from the calf, not the foot. From the Vice article this one is based on:
How did you prepare the foot to be eaten?

Before we cast it, I quickly took a knife from my kitchen and cut a chunk off the top of my shin. The skin was already kind of off from the surgery, leaving a big chunk of muscle exposed. I just took the muscle. I put it in a plastic bag and put it in my freezer.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:47 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


Sorry for the pedantry, but I had to put my foot down.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:48 PM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


*Calling Donner, party of 8. Donner, party of 8.*
posted by sexyrobot at 8:06 PM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


*Donner, party of six, your table is ready.*
posted by sexyrobot at 8:07 PM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


*Donner, party of 4, please come to the hostess stand. Donner, party of 4.*
posted by sexyrobot at 8:09 PM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


*Last call for Donner, party of two...Donner, party of two.*
posted by sexyrobot at 8:11 PM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


*Calling Donner, party of one...last call for Donner, party of one...hello?*
posted by sexyrobot at 8:12 PM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


I suppose I would eat foot taco if it was served with cilantro as the sole garnish.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:32 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


What I’d like to know is whether onefootwander, who had their leg bones cleaned and articulated instead, could actually have a prosthetic made out of them. The bones could be suspended in clear Lucite.
posted by Countess Elena at 9:04 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


Am unsure exactly how, but is there an income stream somewhere in this concept which can help fund MetaFilter and alleviate the current monthly cash shortfall?
posted by Wordshore at 9:07 PM on June 14, 2018 [6 favorites]


Every so often I discover a new reason to be happy I'm a vegetarian.
posted by the_blizz at 9:12 PM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


nthing MarchHare beat me to it
posted by bendy at 9:18 PM on June 14, 2018


This is so wrong. They ate their dessert before dinner?

(How have we gone this far without somebody suggesting they should have served the foot fajitas with fava beans and a nice Chianti?)
posted by Ursula Hitler at 9:37 PM on June 14, 2018


Every so often I discover a new reason to be happy I'm a vegetarian.

So ... would you describe yourself as being low in prions?
posted by sebastienbailard at 11:29 PM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


Relevant Obvious Plant
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 11:52 PM on June 14, 2018


"I suppose I would eat foot taco if it was served with cilantro as the sole garnish."

Oh come on! Human flesh may well be perfectly fine, but cilantro? That stuff is REVOLTING.
posted by Fuchsoid at 3:22 AM on June 15, 2018 [5 favorites]


Oh come on! Human flesh may well be perfectly fine, but cilantro? That stuff is REVOLTING.

Sole garnish. /chortle
posted by Celsius1414 at 1:07 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


What the hell. I had to go to the doctor years back to have a huge wax ball blasted out of my ear, & he wouldn’t even let me look At it, and it turns out you can keep your amputated foot? Fuck that ear doctor, what a jerk. I KNOW MY RIGHTS, SHOW ME THE WAX BALL
posted by Devils Rancher at 11:09 PM on June 16, 2018 [4 favorites]


Am unsure exactly how, but is there an income stream somewhere in this concept which can help fund MetaFilter and alleviate the current monthly cash shortfall?

“I’d give my left leg to help keep this pl... Hey! It was just an expression!
posted by Devils Rancher at 11:12 PM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Every so often I discover a new reason to be happy I'm a vegetarian.
posted by the_blizz


What are your favorite vegetables? Do you eat a lot of allium? You know, onions, garlic, scallions, shallots, leeks and the like. Or do you prefer sweeter things? Asking for a... friend. Yeah, a friend. >:)
posted by Splunge at 11:03 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


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