Pikachu vs Eevee

December 8, 2018 8:54 AM

If we're going to live in a world of ruthless competition, let it be like this.
posted by storybored (16 comments total)

These student athletes have quite good grades, as it turns out.
posted by GenjiandProust at 9:02 AM on December 8, 2018

Eevee's tail and ruff really worked against them. The long jump was a rip-off.
posted by sevenyearlurk at 9:10 AM on December 8, 2018 [4 favorites]

Shock Rat and Me

The only Pokémon that I have ever played is Pokémon Go, which I still play (regularly but casually).

I hate Pikachu. He’s a weak Pokémon who evolves into a different weak Pokémon but who makes up for his weakness by also being a pain in the ass to catch. I would have ignored him entirely after adding him to my Pokédex except that there is an achievement (Pikachu fan) that you unlock by catching 300 Pikachu (Pikachus? Pikas Chu? I don’t know the plural of Pikachu.).

What kind of man would do something that he absolutely hates just to get a virtual award that no one in his life respects and that carries no material value? Let me answer your question with a question: What kind of man is still playing Pokémon Go in December 2018?

A couple of months ago I finally gold-medaled the Pikachu Fan achievement and so I have caught the last non-event Pikachu that I will ever make any sort of effort to catch.

I was really hoping that Eevee would kick Shock Rat’s ass in this video.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 9:32 AM on December 8, 2018 [19 favorites]

Yo these sports are discriminatory against eevee's body type.

Also I want both of those suits.
posted by Going To Maine at 10:01 AM on December 8, 2018 [1 favorite]

Allegations have emerged that Pikachu’s medical team has been caught with a supply of performance enhancing poffins. When we reached out to them for comment, Pikachu’s team replied that the allegations were ‘fake news concocted by Team Rocket’
posted by juv3nal at 12:21 PM on December 8, 2018 [2 favorites]

RIGGED!
posted by ckape at 12:44 PM on December 8, 2018 [1 favorite]

Parasite Unseen, I feel the same about electro rat, and similarly, only got the medal during the last event, and have no plans on ever attempting to catch one again
posted by Ghidorah at 3:15 PM on December 8, 2018 [2 favorites]

My 2-year-old was allowed to watch this and now is standing next to me saying plaintively, "I want to do it again."
posted by potrzebie at 4:14 PM on December 8, 2018 [1 favorite]

I am so upset for Eevee 😤
posted by numaner at 4:35 PM on December 8, 2018 [4 favorites]

What kind of man is still playing Pokémon Go in December 2018?

It's become something of a running joke among the people I meet to take part in Community Days that someone will effectively ask the question, "Oh, you're still playing that game which is in active development and receiving regular, often large and impactful, updates, not to mention remaining relatively unique?"
posted by entity447b at 10:58 PM on December 8, 2018 [9 favorites]

What kind of man is still playing Pokémon Go in December 2018?

Well, let's put it this way. I could drop non-trivial amounts of coin on a game where they prioritized changing the size of horse testicles in response to weather conditions. Or I could spend ten bucks and buy a nice new outfit for my Pokemon Go character, then go for a walk and join a raid where I meet in real life people who are enthusiastic and happy to see me.

Now if you'll excuse me, Professor Daddy has a line on a new rare Pokemon.
posted by happyroach at 2:45 AM on December 9, 2018 [5 favorites]

Entity447b, I finally had a day off for the last weekend long community day and met up with friends to play in Tokyo. There were people playing all over the place (we chose a place with a ton of stops and gyms) and it was pretty great to see so many people playing. The only thing that wasn’t so great, in Japan, it’s not a social game at all. For EX raids, the ones I’ve been able to go to in Tokyo, it’s like a silent flash mob. Ten minutes before, there’s no one on the street. Five minutes before, people start showing up, and by the time the raid starts, there’ll be 200 people silently tapping on their phones. Five minutes later, they’re all gone. No chatting, no talk.
posted by Ghidorah at 2:47 AM on December 9, 2018 [1 favorite]

Pikachus? Pikas Chu?

Pikachū would be a fourth-declension neuter noun, like cornū, so the plural would be Pikachua.
posted by nebulawindphone at 12:34 PM on December 9, 2018

The “real” answer is that Japanese does not do plurals this way, so it’s moot. We could argue about whether Pokémon get counted with -hiki, -non, or something else....
posted by GenjiandProust at 9:16 AM on December 10, 2018 [2 favorites]

The “real” answer is that Japanese does not do plurals this way, so it’s moot. We could argue about whether Pokémon get counted with -hiki, -non, or something else....

I'll defer to the person named after Japan's most famous story (also, I like to use hiki to count kids)
posted by kurumi at 10:12 AM on December 10, 2018 [2 favorites]

My internal dialogue watching this video: "C'mon Eevee. Get it together... No, goddamit. C'mooon. Just... just do the thing. You can do this. Noo..."
posted by mhum at 12:31 PM on December 10, 2018 [1 favorite]