Airport Security Tightens: Al Gore stopped twice for extra screening
June 14, 2002 11:43 AM   Subscribe

 
Well, he is a rather swarthy looking male. Good thing Ann Thrax Coulter hasn't gotten her Dubya appointment to the Homeland Security Cabinet yet or he may have been shot on sight.
posted by nofundy at 11:52 AM on June 14, 2002




There's a computer program that automatically checks anyone with Al- in their name. Apprerently they thought his name was Something Al-Gore. Haha.
posted by cell divide at 11:55 AM on June 14, 2002


Gad Fundy, you have gone around the bend, and I am able to get some enjoyment out of your posts now. Well done.
posted by thirteen at 12:01 PM on June 14, 2002


My father travels often with high-up generals in the DoD to and fro the Pentagon. He once told me a story right after 9/11, when some DC airport officials, who just happened to be Arabic, had to pat down the American general for any metal objects (or something like that).

Funny.
posted by aaronshaf at 12:04 PM on June 14, 2002


Also, Al is sporting quite a beard right now. God only knows what kind of terrorist training could be going on in that thing.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 12:13 PM on June 14, 2002


Ah. Gore has a beard. Ha. That's pretty funny.
posted by eyeballkid at 12:16 PM on June 14, 2002


I'm so glad we're safer now than pre-sept. 11, what with the airport screeners patting down teenage girls, elderly women and washed up politicians...
posted by insomnyuk at 12:18 PM on June 14, 2002


Hey, if I had to pat down teen-aged girls in the interest of national security, I'd begrudingly accept it like the true patriot I am.
posted by zpousman at 12:27 PM on June 14, 2002


Al Gore? Washed up? No way, Bush is down to 69%, and dropping. I officially hijack this thread in the name of the 2004 elections.
posted by gsteff at 12:30 PM on June 14, 2002


Did they find the concealed pole?
posted by machaus at 12:31 PM on June 14, 2002


It's good that they're checking him. After all, there's enough empty space in his head to pack about 40 pounds of C4. Maybe they should run him through the x-ray machine.

Heh. I kid our waffling Golem.
posted by evanizer at 12:32 PM on June 14, 2002


"Ann Thrax Coulter" -- awesome.
posted by artifex at 12:32 PM on June 14, 2002


If this speaks to the quality of people who screen passengers, I'm scared. How much brains does it take to say, "I know our system randomly chose Al Gore, but he's not a terrorist threat. Let's just wave him through."? Only morons are inflexible in situations like this. And it's easy to outwit a moron.
posted by Holden at 12:39 PM on June 14, 2002


What a stupid waste of time. Al Gore is no more a terrorist threat than the little old woman with tweezers.

I would appreciate it if the USA would stop being so damn afraid of "offending" and actually bother checking the people who fit the profile of a hijacker/bomber/terrrorist/etc.

As someone who often flies I do not like the idea that the security staff are patting down people who have NO CHANCE of being a threat instead of spending their time actually concentrating on those who might actually be a threat.

Does that mean racial profiling? Probably. Is that "fair"? No, probably not. Neither is losing family members due to killers getting through because we were too busy being politically correct.

Now, in all fairness, this could mean checking all white males between 25 and 35 - especially if they lean towards the "patriot" movement in the US. And you thought I was talking about arabians, didn't you? My point is: If you can make a reasonable case that a class of people are a potential threat then by all mean pat them down. The little old lady probably doesn't fall under that umbrella, I'll bet...
posted by hadashi at 12:43 PM on June 14, 2002


I think it really isn't random, but more celebrity profiling taking place. Last time I was in an airport, they did nothing like "ticket numbering" or anything. It was basically just everyone lined up to get on the plane, and whoever was next to go on when they finished the previous person got searched. But they always pulled out people who might typically be profiled.

So what they do is pull out celebrities, and say, "see, celebrities get searched too, so it has to be random."
posted by benjh at 12:44 PM on June 14, 2002


Is anybody a little disturbed by the reference to "Al Gore's unmentionables"?
posted by PrinceValium at 12:50 PM on June 14, 2002


Sweet! I got to see Danny Boy get wanded and patted down in Phoenix a few months ago. We were on the same flight. He seemed to take it in stride.
posted by RakDaddy at 12:51 PM on June 14, 2002


What's even more disturbing PinceValium, is how he got them in to his suitcase.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 12:54 PM on June 14, 2002


How much brains does it take to say, "I know our system randomly chose Al Gore, but he's not a terrorist threat. Let's just wave him through."?

But then, Holden, Al Qaeda members would simply dress up like Al Gore. And then there would we be. :)
posted by Marquis at 12:54 PM on June 14, 2002


Its easy to say that Al Gore poses no terrorist threat and the inflexible screeners ought to have preserved his dignity and let him pass. But they probably would have been fired for doing so. I highly doubt that the airlines' profiling system allows for much subjective judgement from the screeners, at least in the direction of leniency. If the screeners superiors found out that they let a celebrity through (as they undoubtedly would), it would probably be a clear protocol breach, and an indication that the screeners might be letting other people through based on appearances, although those instances wouldn't be noticed as much.
posted by gsteff at 12:57 PM on June 14, 2002


Also, Al is sporting quite a beard right now.

Um, Al Gore shaved his beard in March.
posted by mattpfeff at 12:59 PM on June 14, 2002


and CNN had an article about it.
posted by tolkhan at 1:12 PM on June 14, 2002


I'm so glad that when I fly, I can do so in the certainty that I am being protected from former Vice Presidents of the United States of America.
posted by ilsa at 1:45 PM on June 14, 2002


They searched him once and found no weapons, but then he demanded a recount.

I have a future writing lame "Headline News" bits for sketch comedy shows, don't you think?
posted by Shadowkeeper at 1:51 PM on June 14, 2002


I (and many others) have said the problem is we're looking for weapons, when we should be looking for terrorists. In that instance, a soldier who caught a bullet in his jaw (and a purple heart) in Afghanistan wasn't initially permitted to take his dental wire cutters onboard. The ones he needed, in case he began choking.
posted by dhartung at 2:41 PM on June 14, 2002


dhartung: and even with that, there is little security to be found. Claiming that the current measures are successful is bogus since the only airport arrests that have gotten any coverage were by customs on entry into the country. Current security measures repel airport terrorists as well as the blue trim on my garage doors keep dragons away. I haven't seen any dragons so it must be working.
posted by shagoth at 3:33 PM on June 14, 2002


What a stupid waste of time. Al Gore is no more a terrorist threat than the little old woman with tweezers.

I have to agree with you wholeheartedly on that. Hell, he'd micromanage his actions to the point where nobody under him could make a move without passing it through layer upon layer of bureaucracy and the whole organization would grind to a halt. Sort of like his presidential campaign...

But an old woman with tweezers...shudder!! Especially if her target was Al's beard...
posted by RevGreg at 3:41 PM on June 14, 2002


(For Shadowkeeper) *rimshot*

And you thought I was talking about arabians, didn't you?

Make sure you check their teeth!
posted by BitterOldPunk at 3:45 PM on June 14, 2002


They thought his expanding waistline was really a bomb.
posted by Yelling At Nothing at 3:53 PM on June 14, 2002


Homeland security men had a tip that Al-Quaeda was plotting to hack into his programming.
posted by crunchburger at 4:10 PM on June 14, 2002


Is anybody a little disturbed by the reference to "Al Gore's unmentionables"?

That reminds me of Fight Club:

"It's airline policy not to imply ownership in the event of a dildo. Use the indefinite article.
A dildo.
Never your dildo.
Never say the dildo accidentally turned itself on.
A dildo activated itself and created an emergency situation that required the evacuating of your baggage."

posted by insomnyuk at 4:35 PM on June 14, 2002


And don't forget, they're out to get those terrorist toddlers too.
posted by JanetLand at 8:48 AM on June 15, 2002


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