Is Tom Brady a cheater? Ask a 10 year old.
January 24, 2019 8:09 PM   Subscribe

From Yahoo sports Meet Ace Davis, a 10-year-old kid from Lexington, Kentucky who created a science fair project about Tom Brady. While kids in New England might be trying to figure out how to scientifically prove that Brady is the greatest quarterback who ever lived, Ace decided to go in a different direction. He created a science fair project that proves that Brady is a cheater.
posted by gryphonlover (33 comments total) 13 users marked this as a favorite
 
PV = nRT, kid
posted by ocschwar at 8:23 PM on January 24, 2019 [4 favorites]


Gimme some of your money, you don’t deserve it.
I like your style, Ace.

I don't know anything about football. My husband's brother & SIL are very into it. I met them and was introduced to their cats, one of whom is named Tom Brady. For some reason, it didn't cross my mind that people who have named their cat Tom Brady are probably fans of Tom Brady, so I said "Is that the cheater guy?"

My sister in law demonstrated superior breeding and replied "He has been the subject of some controversy."
posted by Emmy Rae at 8:30 PM on January 24, 2019 [70 favorites]


This kid is going to be so disappointed when he loses to Tom Brady’s ‘Can Hamsters Fly Planes?’ experiment.

Also, while I can appreciate his prediction that the Pats will lose because Brady is a cheater, the amount of clapback he should expect to hear from Saints fans this week is not something I envy.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 8:33 PM on January 24, 2019 [7 favorites]


Also, to be a real spoiler, proving that a deflated ball goes farther doesn't prove Brady guilty. Other than that, great experiment, kid. Smart idea, Dad.
posted by etaoin at 8:37 PM on January 24, 2019 [5 favorites]


Proving that Patriots fans are statistically the most awful should be pretty easy, though
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 8:53 PM on January 24, 2019 [11 favorites]


Oh, Ace. Better focus on developing a hater-o-meter and checking your levels.
posted by praemunire at 9:08 PM on January 24, 2019 [2 favorites]


Proof that some act would give someone an advantage is not actually the same as proving that someone performed that act. It's actually bothering me that experiments unrelated to the conclusion walked away with top prize because it was a good troll. (I know the kid's just ten so nothing on him, but as someone who's judged fairs occasionally, this kind of disconnect should be a 'teaching moment' during the interview round.)
posted by mark k at 10:59 PM on January 24, 2019 [11 favorites]


This is a sports page reporting on science. They almost certainly got it wrong.

I wouldn't be surprised if the boy actually got the science right and phrased his hypothesis more like "if Tom Brady used deflated balls, this demonstrates why it would be cheating" and the reporter glossed it as "Kid proves Brady cheated."
posted by straight at 2:22 AM on January 25, 2019 [6 favorites]


If Tom Brady has thrown 10 zillion passes in his career with a normally inflated football I'm not sure how suddenly using a ball that goes farther is actually an advantage. Seems like it would result in a lot of overthrown passes. He isn't going to undo 30 years of muscle memory for one game. The grip might be better in bad weather, but we don't need a science experiment to know that.
posted by COD at 5:02 AM on January 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


Sad to see all the science and Tom Brady stans in here.
posted by kuanes at 5:33 AM on January 25, 2019 [2 favorites]


I see we have some salty Tom Brady fans here at Metafilter.
posted by Anonymous at 5:33 AM on January 25, 2019


Speaking as someone who's been an elementary school science fair judge for about ten years: for a ten-year old, with significant parental involvement, that's a pretty good science fair project. Much better than any of the five variations on 'Mentos and soft drinks: explosion, or explo-fun?,' or the ones where you're not 100% confident that they actually did the project instead of just googling 'science fair project' and made the display board.
posted by box at 5:48 AM on January 25, 2019 [6 favorites]


[Narrator] He is. They all are.
posted by Reasonably Everything Happens at 6:22 AM on January 25, 2019 [3 favorites]


Proving that Patriots fans are statistically the most awful should be pretty easy, though
Hello. There are Cowboys fans.
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:01 AM on January 25, 2019 [6 favorites]


It's a dandy project, the student probably learned some things, so, actual education, yay. Saw this on the news this morning, agree that a parent had some influence.
posted by theora55 at 7:09 AM on January 25, 2019


Psht, you're both wrong, Eagles fans are demonstrably worse, as the only team with no home team advantage because Of the fans. Not that I like any of those teams...
posted by evilDoug at 7:30 AM on January 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


proving that a deflated ball goes farther doesn't prove Brady guilty.

I'm curious what would meet your high bar here for proving Brady guilty. Like, maybe the NFL instituting and the commissioner standing behind a 4 game suspension of Brady over Deflategate. Or, how about the 2nd US District Court of Appeals reinstating that suspension and Brady accepting it?

Do you need like SCOTUS weighing in here? The whole friggin world knows he's a cheat, just like his coach. This is why I can't stand people from the Northeast. They know the Pats are cheaters and they don't care and yet want to pretend they aren't so they can feel good about supporting a team that cheats to get ahead.
posted by allkindsoftime at 9:36 AM on January 25, 2019 [2 favorites]


Or, how about the 2nd US District Court of Appeals reinstating that suspension and Brady accepting it?

The US district court basically ruled that: that they could not "second-guess" the arbitration but were merely determining it "met the minimum legal standards established by the Labor Management Relations Act of 1947".

IE:, they didn't rule on whether Tom Brady cheated or not, they just ruled that the NFLPA and NFL had a legitimate bargained agreement which stated that the NFL has the power to punish members of the NFLPA and that they did so appropriately. That doesn't mean they found the punishment to be just or evaluated the facts in that particular case, just that it was legal.
posted by The_Vegetables at 9:54 AM on January 25, 2019 [3 favorites]


I'm curious what would meet your high bar here for proving Brady guilty.

Your confusion of "This particular science experiment proves X, which is not the same as proving Brady cheated" with "Brady isn't guilty" is not exactly the same mistake as confusing "deflated balls travel farther, so using them would be cheating" with "Brady cheated" but it's close enough to be pretty funny.
posted by straight at 10:11 AM on January 25, 2019 [3 favorites]


They know the Pats are cheaters and they don't care and yet want to pretend they aren't so they can feel good about supporting a team that cheats to get ahead.

They all cheat, allkindsoftime. They. All. Cheat.
posted by Rock Steady at 10:23 AM on January 25, 2019 [4 favorites]


Also, this is a great science project, and I like the kid's moxie, but you don't have to prove a competitive advantage if you want to prove that the Patriots cheated. There is a rule about the permissible PSI for NFL footballs (it's Rule 2). If you ask me (and the Patriots), the NFL did about the worst job you could possibly do in attempting to demonstrate that the Patriots broke Rule 2. The Wells Report in Context is the team's official response to the charges, and it I think it makes an excellent, fact-based case that the Patriots do not appear to have broken Rule 2.
posted by Rock Steady at 10:35 AM on January 25, 2019 [2 favorites]


If by scientifically proving that Tom Brady is the greatest QB, you mean by statistics, I think that's pretty much settled.

One example: Tom Brady has played 19 seasons of football. We'll take out two of those seasons (his rookie year and 2008 when he was out for the season in game 1, Q1 with torn ACL and MCL) where he didn't play much at all, leaving 17 seasons.

He has been to NINE Super Bowls (winning five of them, blah blah blah, one more and he gets the Infinity Gauntlet etc etc). In other words, he has gone to the Super Bowl mores times than he hasn't.

There are many more ridiculous statistics you can dig up on Brady.
posted by kuroikenshi at 10:44 AM on January 25, 2019


Dunno about this kid's project but I do know that Pats in the Superbowl* means one more year of my favorite NFL-related activity: Loudly complaining that Robert Kraft has shit taste in shirts, because anyone who would intentionally wear the crap Bill Lumberg wore in Office Space has shit taste in shirts. I may not make the kind of money Kraft does, but by god, my collars actually match my goddamn shirts.

*YES, NFL, I SAID IT, I DIDN'T SAY "THE BIG GAME", GO AHEAD AND SUE YOU OVER-LITIGIOUS BASTARDS, YOU CAN'T STOP ME
posted by caution live frogs at 11:48 AM on January 25, 2019 [3 favorites]


I love it that there is a lauded kid’s science fair project that does not involve DNA, a fancy lab, electron microscopy, or some other such stuff that shows the kid had mega-help in doing it.
posted by SLC Mom at 12:51 PM on January 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


Hello. There are Cowboys fans.

I watched a whole *(&(*&(* stadium of fans doing war whoops and tomahawk chops last Sunday. The bar for fans in the NFL is very, very low.
posted by praemunire at 1:34 PM on January 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


I just saw a white truck with an InfoWars / Hillary For Jail and Patriots sticker.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 1:57 PM on January 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


I'm curious what would meet your high bar here for proving Brady guilty.

I think Brady is both one of the best quarterbacks ever and also probably a cheater. I am a Pats fan. I am not awful. With that out of the way....

I agree that it's weird when experiments that are supposed to teach kids about the scientific method sort of sidestep that if their topic is fun enough. Deflated balls go further, yes. This kid proved this more or less scientifically (albeit with a small sample size). The stretch between that and "so he cheated" is a big one unless it's supposed to mean "The act of throwing underinflated balls means he cheated" which I don't think it is. Anyhow, I found this both adorable and slightly maddening only because I feel we're in the age of anti-science and I worry.

I think the NFL sucks, a lot of football sucks, the NFLs examination of Brady sucked and I honestly shouldn't be watching football at all.
posted by jessamyn at 2:05 PM on January 25, 2019 [2 favorites]


I wouldn't be surprised if the boy actually got the science right and phrased his hypothesis more like "if Tom Brady used deflated balls, this demonstrates why it would be cheating" and the reporter glossed it as "Kid proves Brady cheated."

The poster is in the story, the framing is about what is reported it seems.

I would agree this might actually have been the best experiment--I'm kind of spoiled seeing projects from Bay Area geek kids; in a small school more like my elementary school this indeed could indeed be the only original one.

If I were trying to coach the kid I would probably get them to realize the question they were answering was Why did Tom Brady's cheating help him? It's totally reasonable for a ten year old to understand that this, and not Did cheating happen?, is the question they answered. The kid gets to keep the anti-Tom Brady slant that was probably a really fun part of the whole setup for him.

And best of all no one needs to re-litigate the Deflate-gate arguments. Though if you want to, my view is the fact that the league's response to the Giants ("my" team) complaining about a different deflation event is "It's not a big deal and not worth investigating, please go away" kind of points to the passion level being related to dislike of the people involved and not the seriousness of the allegations themselves.
posted by mark k at 2:53 PM on January 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


The poster is in the story, the framing is about what is reported it seems.

I could only see the eye-catching headline of the poster, not the actual hypothesis. How did he word it?
posted by straight at 4:22 PM on January 25, 2019


I can't see the hypothesis but the conclusion is clear in one of the pictures: "The Patriots were found guilty of doctoring footballs thus [unreadable] and losing future draft picks. Tom Brady is a cheater."

So he's plenty smart--he knows the guilt is based on a case--but he has the conclusion-unrelated-to-experiment problem.

I've actually gotten over my concern for the fair after my initial post. I said it should have been a teaching opportunity but maybe it was--don't know what happened in any discussion with the judges. Kids are allowed to do their revise-and-resubmit verbally. I'm still not crazy about his framing, which is no better than what's done by a university PR department but also, alas, no worse.
posted by mark k at 6:19 PM on January 25, 2019


I just saw a white truck with an InfoWars / Hillary For Jail and Patriots sticker.

The innocence required to believe here in 2019 that any NFL team doesn't have a sizable contingent of white-supremacist supporters is so rare and beautiful I hesitate to sully it.
posted by praemunire at 10:55 PM on January 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


Tom Brady is the greatest QB

You misspelled Joe Montana.
posted by fuse theorem at 5:38 AM on January 26, 2019 [1 favorite]


On the subject of Pats fans, I was introduced to a friend of a friend from Maine recently. He's a Pats fan. He goes to a Pats bar where they specifically exclude anyone from Massachusetts. Anywhere else in New England, sure. From the actual state? Find another bar.

Even Pats fans hate Pats fans.

Brady and Belichick have transformed the Patriots into the Yankees of the NFL. I am from Boston, I usually live in NYC and I love saying this because it's guaranteed to piss off people from both cities. It doesn't matter if Brady was caught cheating during one game. The Patriots have shown themselves to be a dominant team for the past decade. They're what Trump wishes he was: tired of winning. (Or at least, I'm tired of them winning.)
posted by Hactar at 9:49 AM on January 26, 2019 [1 favorite]


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