June 26, 2002

12:50 PM

New treatment for depression in women possibly best news ever for men.
posted by rushmc (45 comments total)

During my research I have found that the opposite effect is acheived when it ends up on their sofa, curtains, or uniform.
posted by ColdChef at 12:54 PM on June 26, 2002

Best. Post. Ever.
posted by insomnyuk at 12:59 PM on June 26, 2002

Depression in the students ... was more severe the longer they went without sex. Duh!
posted by timeistight at 1:01 PM on June 26, 2002

As amusing as I think this all is, and aside from the fact that in the hands of the stupid it makes a dangerous piece of information "baby, I could wear a condom, but if you end up wanting to kill yourself, don't blame me", it doesn't seem entirely convincing.

The study (and I haven't read the actual study, so I may be off) does seem like it has some loopholes. What if couples who aren't using condoms tend to be in more trusting/secure relationships, and thats the explanation for the mood difference? Anything like a "mood questionare" always seems a little off to me, and the difference in "scores" does seem fairly small for a sample of 300.
posted by malphigian at 1:03 PM on June 26, 2002

Oh, so that explains all the vacuously grinning porn stars.
posted by jonmc at 1:04 PM on June 26, 2002

Since when did this place turn into Fark?
posted by birgitte at 1:05 PM on June 26, 2002

"Scientists at the State University of New York suspect the mood-altering hormones are absorbed through the vagina".

Damn. There goes all the really good jokes.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:05 PM on June 26, 2002

Also, a Salon.com article: 'Can semen cure the blues?'
posted by gummi at 1:06 PM on June 26, 2002

The scientists suspect semen will have the same effect on women regardless of how they are exposed to it.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways ...
posted by yhbc at 1:06 PM on June 26, 2002

I once read that semen has bacteria-killing properties. You can imagine what I said every time the women in my life complained of sore throats. I should adopt the motto: "What's in it for me?"
posted by Holden at 1:11 PM on June 26, 2002

I'm going to print this article out and start taking it to the bars with me.
posted by bingo at 1:12 PM on June 26, 2002

Bingo, can I come? I'm curious to see how many times one guy can get slapped in an evening ;)
posted by mkultra at 1:17 PM on June 26, 2002

can I come?

No pun intended, surely?
posted by tomcosgrave at 1:22 PM on June 26, 2002

Anything like a "mood questionare" always seems a little off to me, and the difference in "scores" does seem fairly small for a sample of 300.

I suspect (based on the scores) that they used the Beck Depression Inventory for their mood test. Developed by cognitive psychologist Aaron Beck, famous for his cognitive theory of depression, it's widely used and accepted. I know therapists that use it to screen new patients (because it's a very quick and simple, yet reliable, test) to get an idea of exactly how severely depressed they are. Based on my experience with the BDI, I think the difference in scores is enough to have some relevance.

[Wow, I never thought I'd get anything out of those two years of psychology.]
posted by katieinshoes at 1:32 PM on June 26, 2002

print this article out and start taking it to the bars

That would take balls.
posted by stbalbach at 1:33 PM on June 26, 2002

Since when did this place turn into Fark?

More or less six months ago, sadly. Maybe it was some post- 9/11 anxiety, maybe too many new users. Discussed on Metatalk quite a bit
Anyway, I've seen worse -- a few days ago, the cock-piercing FPP (with pics, I assume) was definitely worse than this. This FPP is scientific and informative (Reuters) if you compare it to a recent "how to change your semen's taste" FPP
posted by matteo at 1:48 PM on June 26, 2002

That would take balls.

Gee, this is the day for unintended puns, isn't it.
posted by Tin Man at 1:49 PM on June 26, 2002

Cock piercing FPP? When was that? I know there was a uvula piercing thing...

And no, this really isn't like Fark.
posted by insomnyuk at 1:53 PM on June 26, 2002

The cure of woman depression is semen, the cure for man depression is sex. Win Win situation, yay !
posted by elpapacito at 1:59 PM on June 26, 2002

insomnyuk, within the uvula piercing thread I posted a link to a Prince Albert piercing. Think what you want Matteo.

This pokes another hole in the condom-wearing argument, it feels better for everybody without one.
posted by ashbury at 2:08 PM on June 26, 2002

I'm reminded of: the 'boyzone' MeTa thread. thank for giving me the opportunity.
posted by danOstuporStar at 8:45 PM PST on February 24

Great article now to try convincing the girlfriend when she has a headache,
I wish. Not worth my headache, no pun intended.
posted by thomcatspike at 2:12 PM on June 26, 2002

So many jokes... must... maintain... basic... standards... of... decency...
posted by nath at 2:24 PM on June 26, 2002

ashbury:

This pokes another hole in the condom-wearing argument, it feels better for everybody without one.

If, you as I have, had worked in a pathology lab, you would think differently. You'd be surprised how many people are eaten up with incurable STDs and most of them don't even know they have them.

Wear a condom? If you're smart you'll wear two.

I'll take a slight reduction in sensitivity as opposed to getting an incurable disease, thanks!
posted by mark13 at 2:30 PM on June 26, 2002

Come on, can't you see, men, that this is hardly a laughing matter? Get a grip on yourselves, and try to shake these urges to joke about it. It's obviously a deep subject, and although some people might find it hard to swallow, I think the thrust of the matter is that further study is required!
posted by five fresh fish at 2:34 PM on June 26, 2002

insomnyuk - In one way you're right. Fark is a hell of a lot funnier.
posted by birgitte at 2:41 PM on June 26, 2002

So--rry, five fresh fish! I was jizz kidding around.
posted by ColdChef at 2:42 PM on June 26, 2002

Fark is a hell of a lot funnier.

Yeowtch. You really know how to hurt a guy. Luckily, I just found a way to cheer myself up.
posted by ColdChef at 2:43 PM on June 26, 2002

For the Brits...
There must be some very happy biscuits in English boarding schools...
posted by i_cola at 2:50 PM on June 26, 2002

cheer myself up

Strange mental images, can't stop.
posted by birgitte at 2:58 PM on June 26, 2002

In one way you're right. Fark is a hell of a lot funnier.

Hmm...you sound depressed....
posted by rushmc at 3:22 PM on June 26, 2002

Luckily, I just found a way to cheer myself up.

Hehe.

I wonder if anyone is really going to take this research seriously. Every few days the press picks up on some study that hasn't been peer-reviewed and presents it as more or less a fact. Its shakey on the details too.

Lets assume semen is mood altering, but we don't know how mood altering. Is it more potent than theobromine and other mood altering chemicals in ordinary chocoalte? Or the anti-depressive properties of a cup or two of coffee?

If people have to pick up some placebo at least this one isn't made of ground up endangered animals or something potentially lethal like fugu fish.
posted by skallas at 3:23 PM on June 26, 2002

'Fugu me!'
posted by i_cola at 3:31 PM on June 26, 2002

Is it more potent than theobromine and other mood altering chemicals in ordinary chocoalte?

Less fattening, anyway.
posted by rushmc at 3:40 PM on June 26, 2002

Hmm. . .you sound depressed. . . .

Well, I can cheer myself up by knowing that I don't sound like an asshole.
posted by birgitte at 3:42 PM on June 26, 2002

It's true.

It's true.

It's true.
posted by oh posey at 3:44 PM on June 26, 2002

mark13, I don't doubt your findings. Trust me, I'm always covered.

ColdChef, you can't do that all day, you've got to stop. Besides, I would assume it only works on women. Then again, my amorous little guinea pig...
posted by ashbury at 3:45 PM on June 26, 2002

fff:It's obviously a deep subject, and although some people might find it hard to swallow, I think the thrust of the matter is that further study is required!
Best joke of all.
posted by thomcatspike at 4:00 PM on June 26, 2002

Oh, so that's where gay comes from.
posted by semmi at 4:20 PM on June 26, 2002

Is it more potent than theobromine and other mood altering chemicals in ordinary chocoalte? Or the anti-depressive properties of a cup or two of coffee? -skallas

ah yes, but what about coffee with, er, cream? and chocolate with, um, cream filling? i see diversification of the sperm bank revenue model coming...
posted by hob at 6:47 AM on June 27, 2002

Maybe the thread's hopeless, now, but here goes:

There's not much in the article to go on, but is there any evidence that the result:

Women whose partners never used condoms scored about eight on the test while those who never had sex without condoms scored 11.3.

is attributable to the substance itself and not simply to the generally more physically pleasant barrierless contact? I don't really see the correlation as described as being anything other than one of condom use, not one of seminal contact.
posted by majick at 7:31 AM on June 27, 2002

Wear a condom? If you're smart you'll wear two.

mark13: wearing two condoms is actually a particularly stupid thing to do. The friction generated by latex rubbing on latex makes it much more likely that one or both of the condoms will break.
posted by rbellon at 8:05 AM on June 27, 2002

The scientists suspect semen will have the same effect on women regardless of how they are exposed to it.
posted by straight at 8:09 AM on June 27, 2002

Seamen caused depression recently to most of the English population.

(World Cup related)
posted by Frasermoo at 8:43 AM on June 27, 2002

"The scientists suspect semen will have the same effect ..."

Big hat, no cattle. Um, I mean, big hypothesis, no data. HTF does "suspect" qualify as a result worthy of publication? I realize the probability of the press misrepresenting the actual science here is exactly one, but even so I just don't see the dotted line between the data they claim to have and the conclusion they seem to draw. If we follow along in a straight line, there's a layover in conjecture country and a direct overflight of the Wild Ass Guess jungle.

Having said all that, my experience leads me to chime in with: Yeah, what oh posey said!"

But I'm not passing that opinion off as science.
posted by majick at 6:46 PM on June 27, 2002

i_cola - I didn't know that was a tradition in English boarding schools as well. I have heard tell of it in the Army here, though.
posted by dg at 9:09 PM on June 27, 2002