July 1, 2002

12:38 PM

The Grapes of 8th Grade Wrath.
When Andy Johnson refused to participate in a class reading assignment, his teacher gave him an alternative to detention or suspension: after getting permission from his mother, Johnson showed up at school in grungy clothes, goggles and a shower cap. His classmates lined up and pelted him with jelly. They laughed, he laoughed, the teacher and principal laughed...the school board called for a review of discipline policies at the school.
[via Opinion Journal's Best of the Web.]
posted by me3dia (37 comments total)

If only getting pelted with jelly was an acceptable punishment for other things you didn't want to do....

"Don't feel like paying your taxes? Bring out the Smuckers, boys."
posted by turaho at 12:41 PM on July 1, 2002

"Double post? Don your goggles and assume the position..."
posted by adampsyche at 12:43 PM on July 1, 2002

"Double post? Don your goggles and assume the position..."
Grape for double posts, apricot for triples, raspberry for flames...


I think it's great that his mom was willing to sign a consent form for it. My parents would have freaked.
posted by me3dia at 12:46 PM on July 1, 2002

"It was among the suggestions on folded slips of paper submitted by other students, and randomly selected by Johnson."

Knowing how I thought as an eighth grader, the original suggestion didn't involve jelly.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 12:49 PM on July 1, 2002

"It was real creative, not punishment of any sort," Thacker said.

Kid doesn't want to do homework and then becomes center of attention? Everyone has a good time? Maybe it is good that they are looking into discipline policies. What's to prevent the kid from doing it again? "Well I could do my homework, but last time I didn't all my classmates and I had a great time."

I don't know current theories on child psychology, but is it better for a kid to have a "cause and effect" type discipline system (don't do your homework 1 detention, skip school 3 detentions) or a mystery box type system of punishment?
posted by geoff. at 12:52 PM on July 1, 2002

Heck, does the board simply not have enough to do?

If I were on the board, wanting to investigate this, I would be looking at the flagrant waste of time in the classroom, not some weak excuse such as making sure the kid's civil rights were harmed in any way.

"Are we spending the taxpayers money for kids to have a food fight? This is an outrage!"
posted by meep at 12:53 PM on July 1, 2002

Well, really, to sort of echo turaho, what the--?

"I don't want to do this assignment."

"Far out. You get an F. Sit quietly at your desk until we're done."
posted by Skot at 12:54 PM on July 1, 2002

What is dumber this incident or the article? Maybe as a rebel, he thought he was a Stooge(Iggy), jelly not peanut-butter(doh). I bet the author just liked the article having, grapes, jelly, & wrath.
I would've asked to be drowned in wine, as my punishment.
This qualifies as an I love Lucy's son in the 21st century?
posted by thomcatspike at 12:57 PM on July 1, 2002

Johnson had agreed to is as an alternative to detention or suspension.

Oooh. Someone at the Washington Post needs to be jellypelted.
posted by ColdChef at 12:57 PM on July 1, 2002

Did the kid then have to sit in class all day covered in jelly?
posted by internook at 1:02 PM on July 1, 2002

BTW, "Jellypelted" would be a good name for a band.
posted by ColdChef at 1:11 PM on July 1, 2002

No that is what the goggles and shower cap was for, then the kids were allowed to lick him.
posted by thomcatspike at 1:12 PM on July 1, 2002

"It was real creative, not punishment of any sort," Thacker said.

Clearly this is why the school board is getting involved. Afterall, what good is a school that lets its students be creative?
posted by plaino at 1:16 PM on July 1, 2002

For a teenage kid craving attention, this is a dream come true. And he was laughing with his classmates during the 'punishment?' I'm sure he really learned his lesson.
posted by Dirjy at 1:16 PM on July 1, 2002

I can think of several piss-poor rationales behind an exercise like this, and a few good ones. I'd like to talk with this teacher about his angle, and how he presented the activity, and how he thought it played out, and how he followed up with his students. He could be very talented. He could be a moron.

I find stories like this (and the responses they tend to generate) frustrating: simplified soundbite, no context.

Feeling strangely earnest today....
posted by delapohl at 1:27 PM on July 1, 2002

Here is the same story with a little more information. Not much more, mind you, but according to this, Fleming has actually left teaching altogether, not just the school, as the first article implied.
posted by CreequeAlley at 1:40 PM on July 1, 2002

I find stories like this (and the responses they tend to generate) frustrating: simplified soundbite, no context.

You are an idiot; you can't be trusted with the context. (The media's opinion of you, not mine.)

Also, they figure you don't really care since you only read the news to be entertained, anyway.
posted by rushmc at 1:44 PM on July 1, 2002

BTW, "Jellypelted" would be a good name for a band.

Coldchef, I completely agree. Do you often think that certain terms or short phrases would be a good band name? I do that almost daily! I've found SO many on this site alone. I really should keep a list. I'm sure it's being done already elsewhere, but still. :)
posted by rio at 2:12 PM on July 1, 2002

What I find most amusing is the fact that the child psychologist cannot bear to consider how a partially-molded psyche will consider the events as opposed to one wholly discipilined by the internalization of social context and supposition. This is in reference to her remarks of how any substance being thrown at anyone is degrading. Give me a break. She'd probably say Andy Kauffman was a pitiful on stage.
posted by wantwit at 2:16 PM on July 1, 2002

Jellypelting is punishment just like being slimed on Nickelodeon is punishment.

Any combination word, real or not, (radiohead, coldplay, fastball) seems to make a good band name. I should be able to think of more but I offer the quintessential MetaFilter excuse of not having enough caffiene in my system to kick-start my brain. I think some of the combination word user names here (metrocake, tweebiscuit, crasspastor, bluetrain, crunchland, coldchef)) would make great band names as well.
posted by iconomy at 2:33 PM on July 1, 2002

I totally approve of a band named "ColdChef" as long as:
a. They play dixieland or blues
b. The lead singer has illegally long sideburns
c. I get to run up on stage in leiderhosen when they win their first MTV Music award.
posted by ColdChef at 2:39 PM on July 1, 2002

Ehh, they should've just beaten his butt with a paddle while verbally berating him. Apparently that was good enough for me -- in first through third grades, no less!

Being pelted with jelly? Luxury! I used to dreeeeeam of being pelted with jelly ...
posted by chuq at 3:16 PM on July 1, 2002

They need to start giving these judges piss tests.
posted by ponchogaddo at 4:20 PM on July 1, 2002

Punishment is not the only course to reform. So the jelly-throwing incident was not punishment, that much is obvious. But perhaps, the element of surprise incited an intent to change.

Just maybe the students were all shocked at the impromptu jam toss, and the sheer fun of it all, and gained a new respect for their teacher in the process. And since they know thorugh illustration that she is capable of kookiness, and a bit of kindness, they won't want to disappoint her in the future.

Or I'm a completely naive optimist.
posted by brittney at 4:33 PM on July 1, 2002

Back in middle school, one teacher wanted us all to listen to the soundtrack of Jesus Christ Superstar and write an essay about it. He excused anyone who didn't want to listen to it or whose parents didn't want them listening to it, but he made them write an essay anyhow -- explaining the reason(s) for not listening to it. That sounds a lot saner, less intellectually lazy, and more to the point than what this stupid goddamned idiot of a teacher did.
posted by alumshubby at 6:10 PM on July 1, 2002

More than anything, I'm concerned about the school principle, who said "It was real creative,". This woman runs a school, but has demonstrated a strong lack of mastery of the proper use of adjectives. That's frightening. Really frightening.
posted by Dreama at 6:15 PM on July 1, 2002

Back in middle school, one teacher wanted us all to listen to the soundtrack of Jesus Christ Superstar and write an essay about it.

Original Broadway cast or OMPS? Either way, you're right: a chilling punishment. What? Not a punishment? Hrmm....

a lot saner, less intellectually lazy, and more to the point

Now I'm really confused. Going back to downloading bootlegged ColdChef MP3's.
posted by delapohl at 6:47 PM on July 1, 2002

: salutes chuq :

"We had to go and live in a lake!"
posted by yhbc at 6:51 PM on July 1, 2002

I have a friend who teaches 3rd grade. I dread every February, because she starts talking about what project she has in store for her students for "Valentime's Day". Every year I patiently tell her that it's Valentine, but she just doesn't hear me. She also substitutes good for well, as in, "I can't see the blackboard too good".

She buys most of her clothes from a catalog she likes to call L.L. Beam.
posted by iconomy at 6:57 PM on July 1, 2002

Thread hijackers, don your showercaps...
posted by Quixoticlife at 7:04 PM on July 1, 2002

but has demonstrated a strong lack of mastery of the proper use of adjectives

Adverbs, actually.
posted by redfoxtail at 8:22 PM on July 1, 2002

takes baton from yhbc..

"You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road."
posted by dg at 8:57 PM on July 1, 2002

Adverbs, actually.

I knew that. Of course, this is why I am not the principal of a school.
posted by Dreama at 9:29 PM on July 1, 2002

cardboard shoebox?

: dammit, someone, stop me now!!! :
posted by yhbc at 9:30 PM on July 1, 2002

in my experience with the schoolboard when i was in high school, they're nothing but a selection of middleaged parents or spinsters who feel obligated to give back to the community by wasting everyones time and taxpayer money with novel and totally useless ideas to "better education in the county" when really all they do is hamper it. < /my 2 ¢>
posted by sixtwenty3dc at 9:49 PM on July 1, 2002

Aye


too late, can't stop now
posted by dg at 10:31 PM on July 1, 2002

* choke *

you were lucky
posted by yhbc at 4:37 AM on July 2, 2002