July 3, 2002

8:10 PM

Canine candidate challenges Harris in FL electionsHarris the dog is running as a write-in candidate in the Republican primary. Percy is described as "a compassionate conservative who takes a hard-line with social parasites, particularly fleas and worms. His past is free of sex scandals, due to 'timely neutering.'" A great reminder of why this country is so great.
posted by wackybrit (25 comments total)

Sometimes those canines win.
posted by benjh at 8:38 PM on July 3, 2002

Percy is online in full force.
posted by owillis at 8:47 PM on July 3, 2002

They'd better label those photos very clearly.
Side by side, it's like Chang and Ang.
posted by dong_resin at 8:50 PM on July 3, 2002

I love stuff like this. It lightens up the process, gives something to remember different elections by other than the year, and doesn't seem to harm anyone. I wish it happened in Canada, too (that I knew of, anyway).
posted by holycola at 9:04 PM on July 3, 2002

I hear these dogs are on the take from the Alpo lobbyists.
posted by owillis at 9:08 PM on July 3, 2002

Is "Percy has a lot of paws to shake to catch up," REALLY the best Harris' spokeswoman could do? I mean, come on, coming up with memorable quotes about stuff like tax law is this woman's job, surely Harris' staff isn't that humorless...
posted by gsteff at 9:29 PM on July 3, 2002

holycola: we used to have the Rhino Party - they once had a platform that included repealing the law of gravity - in Canada. I don't know what happened to them.

I agree about how great these candidates are. They're my favourite part of election time.
posted by Salmonberry at 9:51 PM on July 3, 2002

I wish it happened in Canada, too (that I knew of, anyway).

What about the Rhinoceros Party (1963-1985) founded by Quebecois novelist Jacques Ferron? When he died, the part disbanded itself in honor of the man, but this guy is trying to bring the Rhino Party back, despite some controversy. It looks like they have stayed somewhat true to Ferron's goal: approaching politics with ironic humor, and most importantly, putting candidates in as many elections as possible without any of them actually being elected.
posted by insomnyuk at 10:03 PM on July 3, 2002

Wow, I didn't see Salmonberry's post until I posted mine. It just goes to show that the new Rhino party's publicity sucks, since both of you guys are in BC and that seems to be where the new one is HQ'ed.

And I love this: "It’s low in fat, just eat rat."
posted by insomnyuk at 10:06 PM on July 3, 2002

Don't forget the Natural Law Party. The flying yogics, who want to commune the world's chakras, or something strange like that.
posted by five fresh fish at 10:06 PM on July 3, 2002

It's nice to form things like the Rhinos if you have money to burn. Anyway they're a very pale imitation of the UK's Monster Raving Loony Party. Frankly I'm not sure that North America can come up with anything at all that's truly original...
posted by clevershark at 10:08 PM on July 3, 2002

Actually the Natural Law Party was just a front for Transcendental Meditation, which essentially converted tax-free political contributions into more Rolls-Royces for the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. Once again you don't have to take my word for it.

My first hint that they were nothing but crooks came when I realized that their "flying yogis" was just a bunch of freaks bouncing around on mattresses. Besides, it's become obvious that TM and Natural Law can't even manage to beat liver cancer, let alone war or deficits...
posted by clevershark at 10:16 PM on July 3, 2002

I'm not sure that North America can come up with anything at all that's truly original...

Anal fisting?
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 11:02 PM on July 3, 2002

Source, Stavros? What a second...I don't want to know that!
posted by Dick Paris at 11:07 PM on July 3, 2002

Stavros, you rock my sangria-ed out self.
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:26 PM on July 3, 2002

I dunno stavros, I'm pretty sure the ancients were all over that, not to mention a few Roman Emperors, I'm willing to bet (probably Nero or Caligula)
posted by insomnyuk at 11:39 PM on July 3, 2002

I'm not sure that North America can come up with anything at all that's truly original...

Corndogs?
posted by y2karl at 11:47 PM on July 3, 2002

Brunch?
posted by vacapinta at 12:21 AM on July 4, 2002

Corndogs for brunch!

Sounds like a winning July 4 idea to me.
posted by youhas at 12:25 AM on July 4, 2002

I'm not sure that North America can come up with anything at all that's truly original...

I can think of at least one thing...

(here's a hint: my name is pretty famous because it was written by one of the greatest artists of the 20th Century)
posted by BlueTrain at 12:42 AM on July 4, 2002

There's even at least one canine former mayor.

A canine governor would also be pretty neato. Maybe we could arrange for some mutt to get sprung from a Minneapolis pound to run for Jesse Ventura's spot when he steps down.

Now that'd be a first: governor goes from being a son of one to just being one...
posted by Bixby23 at 3:22 AM on July 4, 2002

I'd vote for Percy.

I'm thinking about running my dog against my moronic scumbag congressman, who recently said "I could get elected even if I was in a pine box".

He's right, unfortunately.

Hitler, Stalin or Pol Pot could easily get elected in my district as long as they were Republicans.
posted by mark13 at 12:33 PM on July 4, 2002

Likewise in my neck of the woods -- the north-east -- you could say the same if the three aforementioned luminaries ran as Democrats.
posted by clevershark at 7:35 PM on July 4, 2002

Weirdest Most Out There Political Party:

Libertarians!

Best Motto in a particular Florida district:

Vote for the dog, not the bitch!
posted by nofundy at 5:32 AM on July 5, 2002

See, Chang and Ang were twins....
posted by dong_resin at 8:59 PM on July 7, 2002