It's Not Easy Hating Football...

July 19, 2002 7:32 AM

It's Not Easy Hating Football......or sports in general, when all around you conspire to make you feel an outcast and a, well, spoilsport. Andrew O'Hagan's account of his own brave - but losing - battle against (for a lot of us) the waste of time and intelligence that are spectator sports is the funniest, most obsessive and refreshingly blinkered anti-football tirade I've ever read.
posted by MiguelCardoso (14 comments total)

oh, it's very easy hating football. one need merely have watched bullies with marginal intellect receive accolades, special treatment and have undeserved success handed to them throughout high school to hate football.
posted by quonsar at 7:38 AM on July 19, 2002

Here I was expecting an article about football, and for some reason it turns out to be all about soccer.

;-)
posted by Tin Man at 7:38 AM on July 19, 2002

My grandmother advised me years ago to always begin reading a newspaper by turning first to the sports page. There she said, you will always find some people who win.
posted by Postroad at 7:41 AM on July 19, 2002

I find it's much easier to no give a rats ass about sports. Then you might be excluded from some kinds of interaction, but you don't feel left out since talking about athletics doesn't interest you anyhow. Bothering to hate the local team just generates emnity. Of course, if you want everyone to hate you in return...
posted by shagoth at 7:52 AM on July 19, 2002

With my life long disinterest in team sports, I figured this article would be perfect. But as a life long American, I'm afraid half of the UK-culture comments are lost on me. Bummer.

I feel so parochial.
posted by Red58 at 7:54 AM on July 19, 2002

Sport, Sport
Masculine Sport
Equips a young man for society.
Yes sport will make you
A jolly good sort
It's an odd boy who doesn't like sport.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 7:56 AM on July 19, 2002

Red58: Any in particular? I'm offering a free cultural translation service for the rest of the day...

e.g. 'Pizza & fags diet' refers to pizza & cigarettes. I think the US version of the diet would be healthier tho' ;-)
posted by i_cola at 8:30 AM on July 19, 2002

certainly more fun
posted by tolkhan at 8:45 AM on July 19, 2002

Well i_cola thanks! There are so many to choose.

Cake and jelly? sherbet dib-dabs? Jaffa Cakes, Swizzle Sticks, cans of Tizer? Ayrshire Oompa-Loompas ? the revenge of the English swot! netball ?

My Irish co-worker already explained Airofix models.

that's a good list for today. Spell check had a field day with this.
posted by Red58 at 9:56 AM on July 19, 2002

Everything in life is ultimately some sort of waste of time. You have your 15 minutes of life-- might as well enjoy it rather than senselessly arguing about what is truly trivial.

It all is.

GO MARINERS.
posted by xmutex at 10:28 AM on July 19, 2002

Tizer is a sickly drink from the makers of irn bru.
posted by the cuban at 10:40 AM on July 19, 2002

sherbet dib-dabs are heaven but the sherbet fountain is the true king of sweets.
posted by niceness at 1:55 PM on July 19, 2002

I thought Netball was another name for field hockey.
But I was wrong.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 1:59 PM on July 19, 2002

Real football is played by manly men who run into each other with great abandon and with complete disregard for their own personal safety. And without padding or helmets.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:21 PM on July 19, 2002