"In the evenings it’s not PG-rated..."

February 27, 2021 11:22 AM

"There only a few hundred lockmasters employed throughout the United States, and most of them are in the industrial waterways of upstate New York." Originally, "lockmasters literally lived the jobs much like a lighthouse keeper of the day did—constantly on watch, available to take quick action in case of a river-related emergency day or night." (pdf) The last lockmaster moved out of their on-site lockmaster house in 1990. The Mississippi River promises nine feet of navigable depth along its entire length for shipping, and this requires a system of locks and dams, the last of which is in St. Louis Missouri. People who do these jobs start out as a lockman (even the women) and then graduate to being a lockmaster. [via]
posted by jessamyn (19 comments total)

Oo, I grew up in St. Louis and did not know about these folks!
posted by limeonaire at 11:29 AM on February 27, 2021

Yo dawg I heard you like lox so we put some lox in your bagels and cream cheese so you could read this FPP while you nosh.
posted by not_on_display at 11:32 AM on February 27, 2021

Ooh, nice! I grew up right next to the Erie Canal, and the locks and bridges were always fun to watch.

One of Jacques Brel’s most beautifully haunting songs, “L’eclusier” is told from the point of view of a lockmaster watching the cycle of life and death along the waterway. Listen French lyrics and English translation
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:33 AM on February 27, 2021 [3 favorites]

Here's a full transit of the Panama Canal, including locks, in a seven-minute timelapse.
posted by not_on_display at 12:06 PM on February 27, 2021 [8 favorites]

I'm not sure if a lockmaster is the same as a lock keeper, but I do know that Stan Roger's Lock-Keeper is a beautiful song.
posted by clawsoon at 1:27 PM on February 27, 2021 [4 favorites]

Sounds like a good setting for Robert Eggers next film.
posted by Saxon Kane at 2:11 PM on February 27, 2021 [2 favorites]

Anyone else wondering why there was such a need for locksmiths in upstate New York?
posted by leotrotsky at 3:27 PM on February 27, 2021 [6 favorites]

I'm not sure if a lockmaster is the same as a lock keeper, but I do know that Stan Roger's Lock-Keeper is a beautiful song.

...and both differ from the key master and the gate keeper. There is only Zuul.
posted by leotrotsky at 3:29 PM on February 27, 2021 [2 favorites]

The Mississippi River promises nine feet of navigable depth along its entire length for shipping
Only 850 miles of the total 1,300 miles are navigable for shipping. Saint Anthony Falls used to be the upper limit until they built the locks, but even after that there are dams that span the whole river in St. Cloud, and probably elsewhere. Now that they have closed the northern lock to prevent carp from making it farther north, Minneapolis is the upper limit again. I grew up in St. Cloud and fell in the Mississippi at least once. Seeing boats on the river was a rare thing due to the dams and rapids around.
posted by soelo at 6:19 PM on February 27, 2021 [4 favorites]

Anyone else wondering why there was such a need for locksmiths in upstate New York?

I would assume the Erie Canal, but I could be wrong
posted by freakazoid at 7:17 PM on February 27, 2021

It wasn't until the mention of "waterways" that I realized what sorts of locks we were dealing with.

If I could pick a lock, I'd pick Pinopolis Lock which connects Lake Moultrie to the Cooper River. It's no match for the giant shipping locks from the article, but it does its job well.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 7:22 PM on February 27, 2021 [1 favorite]

If I could pick a lock

I see what you did there...
posted by judgement day at 7:58 PM on February 27, 2021 [2 favorites]

Oh, I'm the locktender at Lock Number 10
I whistle and sing every now and again
I'll sing you a ditty about how and when
I saw a young mermaid at Lock Number 10.
...
Everybody sing:

Oh, a locktender's lot can be joyous and free, fa la la, la la, fa la, la la la la
But probably not on the Mon-on-ga-he-lee, fa la la, la la, fa la...

Locktender's Lament, written by Robert Schmertz and sung by Burl Ives
posted by serena15221 at 9:25 PM on February 27, 2021 [3 favorites]

Two brothers, Dennis and Bill Campbell, followed in their family’s footsteps when they started working for USACE as chief lockmasters.
“It’s the best job in the world"

The Soo/Saught Locks
posted by clavdivs at 11:13 PM on February 27, 2021

There's a public observation area at Lock and Dam Number 1 on the Mississippi between Minneapolis and Saint Paul. Notice that they mention on their site, one of the ways that you can 'schedule' lock service is to "pull the recreation pull cord on the lock's guide wall".

This is true! You can watch the lock traffic on a nice, summer day, and one person in a kayak can paddle up, tug on the rope, and shortly the whole giant lock mechanism and procedure will start working to lift or lower the kayaker to the other level.

It's a nice example of a good government service that's available to everyone, no matter how big or small you are.
posted by gimonca at 5:22 AM on February 28, 2021 [6 favorites]

Tired: locks
Wired: wheels
posted by thatwhichfalls at 6:21 AM on February 28, 2021

Anyone else wondering why there was such a need for locksmiths in upstate New York?

"Who are you and how did you get this barge in here?"

"I'm a lockmaster...and I'm a lockmaster."
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 12:23 PM on February 28, 2021 [7 favorites]

If I could pick a lock, I'd pick Pinopolis Lock which connects Lake Moultrie to the Cooper River. It's no match for the giant shipping locks from the article, but it does its job well.
Is that near the Damocles Docks where one can catch the Fickle Ferry?
posted by boilermonster at 8:35 AM on March 2, 2021

Every summer, we used to take an afternoon cruise on an old-fashioned mule-drawn canal boat. A banjo player would lead a singalong of all the great old-timey songs, and the costumed muleskinners would dance along the towpath.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 3:55 PM on March 2, 2021