September 5, 2002

9:54 PM

Get on the love trainand ride the singles car: "Thousands of New Yorkers are now forwarding an anonymous e-mail to each other informing them that from now on, every first subway car has been declared 'the singles car.'" Any New York Mefites want to claim responsibility for this?
posted by mr_crash_davis (24 comments total)

Damn if this takes off I might have to walk to the second car! The first car stops right by the enterance to the station near my house (train towards Manhattan).

Leave the first car be.
posted by riffola at 10:01 PM on September 5, 2002

I think all the cars should be specialized. I would enjoy a car full of Three-Card Monty dealers if I fancied a gamble, or perhaps a "Staring Contest" car, or maybe a car solely for street musicians where they can jam together.

Or, for the singles car, every passenger must submit to a "Am I hot or not" rating, and each car will be separated accordingly. (i.e. I am a 7.3, so I will be in the 7th car)
posted by Stan Chin at 10:07 PM on September 5, 2002

“You can’t be a subway playboy and walk around with a martini,” he said.

Hmmm...
posted by MiguelCardoso at 10:21 PM on September 5, 2002

Will gay singles get the rear car, then?
posted by Ryvar at 10:49 PM on September 5, 2002

Kelly said the first cars of many subway trains have become so overrun that the second car has become a de facto "singles car for people who aren't so desperate as to need to squeeze into the front car."

And the third car has been titled "The Singles Car For People Who Too Shy For The First Or Second Car, But Really Are Nice People Once You Get Then To Open Up."
posted by Neale at 11:02 PM on September 5, 2002

The Singles Car For People Who Too Shy For The First

When I first read that, I thought it said "Too Shy For The Fist" and was wondering why the public transit here isn't so, ummm, exciting.

I think all the cars should be specialized. I would enjoy a car full of Three-Card Monty dealers if I fancied a gamble, or perhaps a "Staring Contest" car, or maybe a car solely for street musicians where they can jam together.

I like the idea of a staring contest car, though I suspect many of the female subway-riders already unwillingly engage in one-way staring contests while riding the subway.
posted by The God Complex at 11:12 PM on September 5, 2002

Will gay singles get the rear car, then?

[Extremely tasteless Chris Rock type "southern transit system" joke here]

posted by Stan Chin at 11:31 PM on September 5, 2002

"The last car of every train, appropriately enough, is the anal sex car," Kelly added.

I didn't need to know that...

The first link reads like a refugee from The Onion. This is humor, right? I'm willing to believe the 'singles car', but not the rest.
posted by Slithy_Tove at 11:51 PM on September 5, 2002

I'm waiting for the orgy car..
posted by slipperywhenwet at 11:57 PM on September 5, 2002

"The last car of every train, appropriately enough, is the anal sex car," Kelly added.

Cripes. I made my above comment without even reading the article. There's some irony for ya.
posted by Ryvar at 12:50 AM on September 6, 2002

I'm still laughing at Stan Chin's post... the first one.

... a Staring Contest Car.... HAHA!

... crane kick... HAHA!

Hey, it's 5:45am damn it. I've been at work for 3 hours already. Wheeee!... and , AND Rosanna by TOTO is randomly wailing from the MP3 drive. Lucky me. What the hell is happening?
posted by Witty at 2:46 AM on September 6, 2002

Okay, tell you what. I'm gonna go out an try this right now, and I'll let you know how it goes.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 4:31 AM on September 6, 2002

Erm, gr'ups are pretty desperate to get a date these days aren't they? Although the idea of a staring contest car is hilarious :D Is that first link a fake news site, like the onion?

Rosanna by TOTO is randomly wailing from the MP3 drive

You mean on purpose, or do you share your computer with other co-workers??
posted by zarah at 5:32 AM on September 6, 2002

Went to a party
I danced all night
I drank 16 beers
And I started up a fight

But now I am jaded
You're out of luck
I'm rolling down the stairs
Too drunk to fuck
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:38 AM on September 6, 2002

Perhaps slightly on purpose. I've grown tired of dealing with what's available. So I randomize all 4,000 tracks. I am responsible for the fact that music is currently playing, just not really for what song is being randomly chosen.

Oddly enough, the current track is Lord of the Rings by STYX. I'm in hell.
posted by Witty at 5:52 AM on September 6, 2002

I'm not sure which is the scarier thought: A Dead Kennedys car or a Styx car... I think I'd have to go with Jello Biafra
posted by ElvisJesus at 6:02 AM on September 6, 2002

Let the extreme right hand side of the train be the I/P car, and the left is the 'Shrub is President?' car.

I'll be down the far end....
posted by dash_slot- at 6:08 AM on September 6, 2002

I declare the first car the "Stupid people who stupidly forward stupid chain letters" car.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 7:28 AM on September 6, 2002

slithy: I believe the word Rejected! in large letters at the top of the page is supposed to be our cue not to take it seriously.
posted by blueshammer at 7:34 AM on September 6, 2002

Could we make every second subway train a hopelessly cynical and jaded bloggers' car?
That's my ride.
posted by Dukebloo at 7:54 AM on September 6, 2002

Okay, I'm back. No luck. Just a dirty old man who stared at me a little bit too long and a nice Asian lady who went car to car peddling minature figurines of the World Trade Center with an American flag on on side and a thermometer in the other.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 8:58 AM on September 6, 2002

Ever since I saw this email a couple weeks ago, I've been riding in the first car (I'm not single or hetero, just overly curious about spam). I just got off (not got off on) an F train and a C train, and boy howdy, no action, no playas, no disco, no booty, no swingles. Perhaps it was the terrorists-winning car.

Ooo, a thermometer AND a flag you say? That shits gonna be worth money soon.
posted by RJ Reynolds at 9:09 AM on September 6, 2002

Yeah when you want to take the temperature of America's patriotism.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 2:04 PM on September 6, 2002

Ouch! Trust me, I'm patriotic.
posted by Wood at 4:18 PM on September 6, 2002