October 7, 2002

6:35 AM

Memories of a dead friend, posted bit by bit: this obituary for Milon Buneta (who died when he was 20, 20 years ago) is a weblog. His friend is writing it as a weblog because it's not a story newspapers would carry, yet the posts seem so poignant, brief, concentrated that it seems the weblog form is perfect for gathering the fragments we remember about our dead. Do you know of any other weblog obituaries?
posted by jill (8 comments total)

While it is quite touching, sometimes you have to let go. And this dude hasn't. 20 years is a long time to hold a candle.
posted by PenDevil at 6:47 AM on October 7, 2002

Nice idea, and well worth reading for this story:

Milon's was a made-up name. He was born on March 10, 1961, in War Memorial Hospital, Waverley, and the hospital, in its bureaucratic way, wanted a name promptly.

Milan was a possibility, a familiar name in the Balkans that Milon's parents, Tomislav and Katica, had left behind. Tomislav's father was a Milan.

"Tomislav, he said, I leave it to you," Katica recalled tonight, when I asked her about this.

She liked the sound of "Milo" (pronounced "meelo"). Milo is a term of affection --- "dear" --- in her language. "Not exactly Milo, not exactly Milan," she said, thinking out loud, as the hospital and its blank form waited.

"And Tomislav said --- Milon --- and I said, yes, that's nice. So we made up this name."

posted by languagehat at 6:57 AM on October 7, 2002

I think its really interesting. I certainly don't think its unhealthy (necessarily) in any way. You might want to post it on blogrootsas well.
posted by xammerboy at 7:03 AM on October 7, 2002

Actually, PenDevil:

HIS mother tracked me down. She knew I'd become a journalist and she had a story for me.

She wanted me to write about Milon Buneta, her son and my friend from those years when life puts on speed and seems on the brink of arriving everywhere at once.
posted by valval22 at 7:04 AM on October 7, 2002

I don't think it's a matter of letting go...it's just a collection of memories about someone he loved. I think it's a gentle tribute and something he's probably doing for his friend's mother. There have been plenty of times I've thought about collecting the stories of my grandmother's life who died over 30 years ago by putting them down in written form. But I procrastinated too long and all those who held the details of her very colorful life have now died including my mother.

Those kind of candles really never die. I think it's a great idea even if the only one that ever reads it is yourself. Thanks Jill for giving me a little gush of memory this morning about my own losses.
posted by oh posey at 7:16 AM on October 7, 2002

Wow, that is really really touching. A unique way to use a weblog. Some might say he's "holding a candle", but sometimes someone touches you in ways that you might not understand at the time. It's only over time that you realize what that person's influence over you was.
posted by mkelley at 7:34 AM on October 7, 2002

It's an interesting experiment, but I don't know that it lends itself to the weblog form unless it becomes a collaboration with others who knew him. The time required to learn out about Milon, as scattered memories are presented over weeks or even months, is pretty high. I do think it's admirable of him to take this on for the guy's grieving mother.
posted by rcade at 7:46 AM on October 7, 2002

I noticed on a Daypop textad today, there's a weblog devoted to posting obituaries.
posted by mathowie at 11:56 AM on October 7, 2002