October 11, 2002

12:49 PM

Look at your hands. Is your index finger shorter or longer than your ring finger? Be careful because according to John T. Manning, those two fingers reveal a variety of characteristics about yourself to the world including assertiveness, attractiveness, reproductive success, hand preference, verbal fluency, autism, depression, health and disease, homosexuality tendancies, musical and sports aptitudes. [via Tigerbunny]
And while you are at it don't forget what the middle finger and a long second toe might reveal.
posted by oh posey (37 comments total)

I couldn't find the section on determining people's personalities from the bumps on their head.
posted by Badgermann at 12:54 PM on October 11, 2002

My 2D and 4D are the same length. I guess that means I'm bi? Or asexual? I know that since I'm a Scorpio, I am vain, sexually obsessed, powerfully intimidating, and my favorite colors are blah blah blah.
posted by mikrophon at 1:01 PM on October 11, 2002

2D and 4D same length is what is normal for women. What this actually means in real life is difficult to say.
posted by Veritron at 1:06 PM on October 11, 2002

As a skeptical and pragmatic Capricorn, I'm fairly certain that John T. Manning is full of shit.
posted by spotmeter at 1:10 PM on October 11, 2002

Veritron, I may have missed something, but I think the point of the book reviewed is that the author proposes some very specific meanings for the ratio.

What I really want to know is why I keep typing an 'n' at the end of ratio. Not really but substantially more interesting question than what the digit ration means.

on preview: spotmeter, can a Taurus be skeptical too? ya think?
posted by billsaysthis at 1:11 PM on October 11, 2002

So this guy thinks that homosexuality is related to aggression and being good at sports. Yeah, right. Maybe he'll be impressed by my enormous shoes
posted by grahamwell at 1:14 PM on October 11, 2002

I have same length 2D and 4D on my right hand, on my left hand my 4D is slightly longer.

I would never have known this if not for this thread.
posted by WolfDaddy at 1:14 PM on October 11, 2002

Damn. I only have four fingers on my middle hand.
posted by eyeballkid at 1:18 PM on October 11, 2002

My ring fingers are much longer than my index fingers, but I think that's because my father, John T. Manning, pulled on them with pliers for an hour every night before I went to bed.
posted by yhbc at 1:19 PM on October 11, 2002

Really? And my penis hangs to the left, when it's flaccid.

That reveals my state of sexual arousal.
posted by livingdots at 1:22 PM on October 11, 2002

What does it mean if your penis is longer than your forearm?
posted by NedKoppel at 1:23 PM on October 11, 2002

That you have trouble feeding yourself?
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 1:26 PM on October 11, 2002

My penis is longer than yours, but I think that's because my father, John T. Manning, pulled on it with pliers for an hour every night before I went to bed.
posted by soyjoy at 1:30 PM on October 11, 2002

Really, though, I get the sense that this is about as scientifically credible as reverse speech.
posted by soyjoy at 1:33 PM on October 11, 2002

Has anyone asked Matt if it's time to close this chat room off to new users?
posted by yonderboy at 1:33 PM on October 11, 2002

This thread is better than nitrous oxide.
posted by languagehat at 1:39 PM on October 11, 2002

Yikers! My 2nd toe is longer than my big toe.

That explains why I've been killing all those people.
posted by Kafkaesque at 1:50 PM on October 11, 2002

Ok, but what does it mean if your 2D is substantially longer than your 4D? Should I fear the full moon?

Signed, Disturbed with Digital Diagnosis
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 1:55 PM on October 11, 2002

I have super long "spider fingers", because Mr. Marfan has apparently been pulling at my chromosomes with tiny little pliers.

And I have a big bump on my head that would have once been seen as proof of my "combativeness," because Mama Scody dropped me when I was a wee lass. (This last link is fun -- go phrenologically hogwild!)
posted by scody at 2:01 PM on October 11, 2002

If my ring finger is most significantly longer, does it make me a BIG lesbian? Cause if it does, maybe I need to buy more flashy rings or something; it'd be a shame to keep that to myself.
posted by answergrape at 2:02 PM on October 11, 2002

Hey, all my fingers are 3D!
posted by kirkaracha at 2:35 PM on October 11, 2002

The majority of women have digits of similar length, with the notable exception of lesbians. They tend to have ratios that are similar to those of men.

"Somehow, these women might have gotten an errant dose — an accidental tsunami of Testosterone — during their first trimester in the womb. As a result (and this is just one theory), their sexual preferences leaned strongly toward other women. Were it not for their lack of penises, the presence of breasts, and an affinity for LPGA-sponsored events, they might as well have been men."[link]
posted by oh posey at 2:37 PM on October 11, 2002

Some further inspection reveals that John Manning is actually a plastic surgeon, with what can only be a very elaborate plan to raise new business....
posted by mattpfeff at 2:38 PM on October 11, 2002

Damn. 2D...4D...it's all so confusing. I wouldn't know what to believe in anymore if it weren't for my Lucky Astrology Mood Watch.
posted by mathis23 at 3:09 PM on October 11, 2002

it has been suggested that the male digit ratio pattern may be functional -- a longer ring finger may help to stabilize the third digit (the middle finger) when throwing objects, thus increasing throwing accuracy.

wouldn't the general length of fingers overall have more impact on throwing than the miniscule difference between a ratio of .96 and one of 1?
posted by mdn at 3:14 PM on October 11, 2002

%5 of the population has a longer second toe which means we have about 15 million serial killers in America.

Perhaps the ring finger has grown to better use the 'p' 'r' and '0' keys which is an essential part of 'pr0n'. Or the other way around.
posted by stbalbach at 3:50 PM on October 11, 2002

Upon sober reflection, I have concluded that my extra long index finger is indicative of my vampiric tendencies.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 3:55 PM on October 11, 2002

I have long noticed that looking at my palms, my 4D is longer than my 2D on my left hand, and vice versa on the right. Looking at the backs of the hands, the 4D is longer in both cases.

Perhaps the ring finger has grown to better use the 'p' 'r' and '0' keys which is an essential part of 'pr0n'.

Is the ring finger the standard finger for hitting the 'p'? I always use my fifth finger, which is consistent with hitting 'q' with my fifth finger. Personally, I think ring fingers evolved to assist with eating pancakes.
posted by quarantine at 4:08 PM on October 11, 2002

However, if your index finger is longer than your middle finger, it almost certainly means you're a werewolf. If you spot such a person (particularly if he or she also has a unibrow), steer very clear as the full moon approaches. Because, as you know, even a man who is pure at heart and says his prayers by night can become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms and the moon is full and bright...

OwwwwoOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
posted by chuq at 5:17 PM on October 11, 2002

This is the second time in less than a week that someone's linked to an image of Galileo's mummified middle finger.

Just in case anyone's keeping track of links to images of Galileo's mummified middle finger, and stuff.
posted by iconomy at 5:20 PM on October 11, 2002

On that subject, this book was a pretty good read,
posted by jaded at 6:15 PM on October 11, 2002

Make that three times!
posted by iconomy at 6:32 PM on October 11, 2002

Let's have a look at the Long Second Toe story's URL.
http://www.chebucto.ns.ca/Recreation/Notionalpest/longtoes.html
Notional Pest? Hmm. That's a new one.
A closer inspection of some of the recent additions reveals that this is most likely satire.

Do I get a prize?
posted by Dillonlikescookies at 7:17 PM on October 11, 2002

Do I get a prize?

I'm afraid Badgermann caught on right away so technically he wins the prize. Sorry.
posted by oh posey at 7:50 PM on October 11, 2002

bwahahahaha!
posted by tolkhan at 12:50 AM on October 12, 2002

what a bunch of BS, especially the part about finger length indicating homosexual tendencies!
posted by jasontromm at 10:48 AM on October 12, 2002

It's not about the fingers. folks - it's about the nose!
posted by Carlos Quevedo at 12:46 PM on October 18, 2002