Comments on: Comments on 21067

Post number 21067

BentPenguin — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 10:52:43 -0800

"That's not funny, that's sick!" goes the old National Lampoon comic caption. Well, maybe this link's both... Again, not for the faint of heart.

By: tpl1212

tpl1212 — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:01:17 -0800

Oooh, how I wish I could say that I saw a bumper sticker that said "My pee smells like ham" ...but I can't.

By: BigPicnic

BigPicnic — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:09:27 -0800

I'm curious to know if anyone could possibly read that description and not click on the link.

By: ewagoner

ewagoner — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:11:04 -0800

Oh, but you can, tpl1212, thanks to the good folks at makestickers.com.

By: Mushkelley

Mushkelley — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:12:25 -0800

If anyone was wondering what the true purpose of Metafilter should be, or what kind of posts are good posts... Well look no further. A truly enjoyable read! Thanks BentPenguin.

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:23:19 -0800

Yeah, good post, BentPenguin... so that's why you picked that name. Oh, and Bigpicnic... I say: No.

By: Fabulon7

Fabulon7 — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:26:25 -0800

Enjoyable? Really? Unnerving, I would say. My last period looked like meat.?? Dear God.

By: serafinapekkala

serafinapekkala — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:26:39 -0800

I like the ones that are like, "I'm messin' around with my wife, my three girlfriends, my sister-in-law, etc etc and they're all dirty whores!" puh-lease...and hey, did you read this on ObscureStore, BentPenguin? give Jim Romenesko his due, if so...

By: BentPenguin

BentPenguin — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:29:42 -0800

Actually, Serafina, my source=Filepile for the trackbackers in the crowd.

By: archimago

archimago — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:34:31 -0800

I should have put my sandwich down before I read that. Luckily it was not a ham sandwich. I want the whole list of hundreds so i can read it every time I think I'm having a bad day.

By: Eekacat

Eekacat — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:43:08 -0800

Frank Zappa sang it best with "Why does it hurt when I pee?" "My pee smells like ham" Could have been a part of a Monty Python sketch if only they had said "Spam" instead.

By: Pressed Rat

Pressed Rat — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:46:25 -0800

A friend of mine in college had a biochemistry degree and later came back for a degree in chemical engineering. In between, he worked at the Lubbock, TX health department in the section that dealt with VD & other public health issues. He had some wacked-out stories to tell (which was part of his motivation to get an engineering degree to get the hell out of there). The one that stuck with me was the one about an employee at Church's Fried Chicken that called in and said that they had seen the manager whacking off in the chicken batter. My friend was the one who had to go down and talk to the guy about it - what a job.....

By: yhbc

yhbc — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 11:52:30 -0800

I swear I've seen this somewhere else earlier today, but of course that's impossible.

By: pardonyou?

pardonyou? — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:04:51 -0800

yhbc, it's just "deja vu all over again" monkeying around with your noggin.

By: konolia

konolia — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:14:30 -0800

I think that was a double post. It was here earlier, anyway.

By: yhbc

yhbc — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:21:55 -0800

That must be it pardonyou. I was afraid I was going bananas there for a minute (or even potatoes - eughh!)

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:25:40 -0800

I swear I've seen this somewhere else earlier today, but of course that's impossible. Good stories travel fast. "I think they hypnotized me and put implants and poltergeists in my brain and had sex with me." I may never stop laughing.

By: yhbc

yhbc — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:37:42 -0800

Or at least for about nine more days, eh, Chef? Hey, no linking, dammit!

By: Samsonov14

Samsonov14 — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:40:11 -0800

Yeah, it's pretty funny until it happens to you, ColdChef.

By: ColdChef

ColdChef — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:43:56 -0800

"I'm releasing semen when I take a crap." That may perhaps be the dirtiest sentence I've ever read.

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:45:47 -0800

The one that stuck with me was the one about an employee at Church's Fried Chicken that called in and said that they had seen the manager whacking off in the chicken batter. I've heard the same rumour about the KFC in my hometown, and a KFC in my current town. Methinks it's either a corporate policy, or an urban legend...

By: Songdog

Songdog — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 12:54:35 -0800

Meat?

By: Pressed Rat

Pressed Rat — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 13:07:12 -0800

fivefreshfish Normally I'd discount rumors like that, except that I knew the guy personally who had to go out from the health department and bring the subject up with the manager, so no urban legend here. You're right about the corporate policy thing, though - I've heard too many stories about guys taking dumps in the chocolate shake machine, that kind of stuff. The old adage about how people wouldn't go out to eat if they knew what went on in the kitchen is definitely based on some element of truth, however. I've seen waitresses at country clubs pick steaks/prime rib up off the floor and plop it back on the plate when it fell off & walk right out the door to serve it up. Spitting contests at burger joints to see who could spit farthest to hit the grill, etc. When I worked at the UNiv. of Tennesee student center in the 60's another student I worked with was working as the hamburger chef in the line. Some obnoxious clown wanted a hotdog right now & kept bitching about how long it was taking to get (we were out of cooked ones & it had to cook on one of those rotating hotdog cookers). Finally, tired of the bitching, Alexander took a dead mouse he'd found back in the kitchen, put it on a bun and shoved it out to the guy. He got fired, but it was funny as hell.

By: Secret Life of Gravy

Secret Life of Gravy — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 14:37:16 -0800

"I live at the VA and my roommate has his girlfriend from Minneapolis over. They throw ticks at me that bite my neck and when I pop the sores, they smell like vagina juice." Vagina Juice great name for a band...or a health food store!

By: chrismear

chrismear — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 14:57:26 -0800

Hmmm... I don't know about everyone else, but I think people are embarassed enough about going to their sexual health clinic, without the added worry that their complaints (surely said in privacy to the health workers at the clinic?) might be broadcast to the masses. Sure, nurses from facility sharing their cases, but this just seems a bit wrong, even if it is completely anonymous.

By: kavasa

kavasa — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 15:23:33 -0800

Chris - maybe, but the quotes aren't attributed to anyone. The potential harm to the quoted is pretty much zero, I'd say. Besides. Her last period looked like meat - getting linked to from MeFi is the least of her worries.

By: Woolcott'sKindredGal

Woolcott'sKindredGal — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 16:25:25 -0800

Agreed, they are completely anonymous. I have to say that as a hypochondriac, some of the things I have said to my doctor are pretty ridiculous. I don't have a problem with them being shared, so long as it's really, really and truly anonymous.

By: languagehat

languagehat — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 16:31:33 -0800

Pressed Rat: That was you in that bun, wasn't it?

By: adamt

adamt — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 16:40:56 -0800

The one that stuck with me was the one about an employee at Church's Fried Chicken that called in and said that they had seen the manager whacking off in the chicken batter. I've heard the same rumour about the KFC in my hometown, and a KFC in my current town. Methinks it's either a corporate policy, or an urban legend... So that leaves just 10 secret herbs and spices left to identify.

By: adamgreenfield

adamgreenfield — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 17:33:54 -0800

Me too! I want the whoooooole list. Priceless post, thanks.

By: konolia

konolia — Thu, 24 Oct 2002 19:20:47 -0800

I worked in a country club years ago. They were having some sort of outside party...the hired help was bringing out the potato salad and tripped, with the food going all over the asphalt. They scooped up the mess and went inside. When they came out everyone was commenting "good thing they had another batch back in the kitchen." There WASN"T another batch in the kitchen.... That's why I like Waffle House. At least you can WATCH what they do to your food.

By: johnnyboy

johnnyboy — Fri, 25 Oct 2002 04:04:47 -0800

freakin' hilarious, I have to say though if it looks like meat then it don't sound too healthy love.

By: elwoodwiles

elwoodwiles — Fri, 25 Oct 2002 14:36:02 -0800

20 minutes of fun isn't worth a lifetime of topical salve.