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First Human Clone to be born in January
November 26, 2002 11:15 PM   Subscribe

First Human Clone to be Born in January. Discuss.
posted by McBain (39 comments total)

 
I want to clone myself so I can raise me right and whup some damn sense into my head.
posted by troutfishing at 11:24 PM on November 26, 2002


Begun this clone war has.
posted by Danelope at 11:31 PM on November 26, 2002


Enter: evolution.
posted by four panels at 11:32 PM on November 26, 2002


Hehe.
posted by donkeyschlong at 11:32 PM on November 26, 2002


*!*
posted by troutfishing at 11:37 PM on November 26, 2002


Uh pardon me.. wasn't the first clone born when some prehistoric woman gave birth to identical twins?
posted by PenDevil at 12:30 AM on November 27, 2002


Well...What took so long?
posted by black8 at 12:42 AM on November 27, 2002


PenDevil, that's not cloning. Cloning is when you take the DNA from one cell (a mammary cell in the case of Dolly the sheep) and insert it into an egg, then create a pregnancy with that egg. The trick is getting a mammary cell to lose its differentiation, which causes it to divide and create only mammary cells, and differentiate into all the cells of the body, *without errors*. Problem is, Dolly had errors which make me fear for these fetuses, if they exist. The doctor has been repeatedly characterized as a boastful man of dubious repute.
posted by planetkyoto at 1:24 AM on November 27, 2002


Specifically, Dolly had had telomeres that were 20% shorter than normal sheep. Telomeres are DNA strands at the end of her chromosomes that break off as one gets older, and seem to be a limiting factor on cell divison, thus related to aging. These people are all for it, though, in a blindly optimistic sort of way, but to their shame they seem more interested in Stephen Hawking than in Elvis.
posted by planetkyoto at 1:32 AM on November 27, 2002


Considering the number oif failed pregnancies (I believe it was in the 100s) before Dolly was born, I highly doubt that this supposed baby-to-be is a clone. I'll believe it when a genetic test is done and shown to be a match for an already grown person.

Of course, if it really is a clone, I'm with planetkyoto -- chances for abnormalities are high. Forget about Dolly - most of the bovine cloning attempts have ended in disaster when normal-looking calves died for no apparent reason. I really can't see a situation where cloning is necessary to treat infertility -- that doctor didn't need to use cloning to get a post-menopausal woman pregnant. I don't see the point of human cloning other than to be able to boast that you did it.
posted by meep at 1:35 AM on November 27, 2002


The major problems from cloning come from the lack of imprinted genes - genes which are only present in either sperm or egg. These genes often have important consequences for the developing foetus. See the link for more details.
posted by BigCalm at 1:45 AM on November 27, 2002


more information here
posted by BigCalm at 1:52 AM on November 27, 2002


but we already have humans!

When do I get my wooly mammoth clone?
posted by cadastral at 2:35 AM on November 27, 2002


I'm so upset- this was supposed to be my conceptual art project. I wanted to give birth to my own clone, and then raise it myself. Repeat as needed to achieve desired results. Something like the Alter Ego game, except with live humans!
posted by faustessa at 2:52 AM on November 27, 2002


When do I get my wooly mammoth clone?

I want one too, but it may have to live a few generations as a demi-elephant first.
posted by hama7 at 3:04 AM on November 27, 2002


I hope it glows in the dark, hums Mozart, and levitates Akron, Ohio with its left index finger.
posted by Opus Dark at 3:52 AM on November 27, 2002


Yes, but how much more delicious will these cloned babies be?

Will it lactate spider's milk? Can it glow in the dark? Is it powered by cold fusion? Honestly, it's nice of them to tell us about the clone, but shouldn't they at least hint at which genes they spliced into it? If they didn't splice in something cool I hardly see the point of making a clone.

I, for one, would like to welcome our delicious web-slinging iridescent overlord with frankincense or myrrh, but how do I choose when they won't tell me what it can do?

Really though, I think someone better call shenanigans on these guys.
posted by putzface_dickman at 4:22 AM on November 27, 2002


Can't they fix the cellular damage while the person is stuck inside the transporter?
posted by dhartung at 5:25 AM on November 27, 2002


Putzface, that was the single best "I welcome our [...] overlords" line ever used.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:39 AM on November 27, 2002


20 bucks says that religous guy on TV, Impy, is going to claim that this is the devil, and judgement is riiiiiight around the corner.
posted by CrazyJub at 5:56 AM on November 27, 2002


Science... what a mess. Science has been our greatest blessing and our greatest harm and waste. There are more useful and needy things to spend money on than this.
posted by grehy at 6:26 AM on November 27, 2002


Perhaps this is what they are really up to.

Can't say I'm grateful.
posted by Dunvegan at 6:32 AM on November 27, 2002


Hmm...Italian fertility expert...cloning...could it be...Jesus!?
posted by gottabefunky at 7:11 AM on November 27, 2002


If it is indeed a cloned baby and if it is born, lives shortly, then dies because of problems with the cloning - is it murder?
posted by four panels at 7:12 AM on November 27, 2002


"Demonstrators & journalists who gathered in Charlotte, N.C. for the groundbreaking ceremony for the new Billy Graham Center asked, “How do you feel about Muslims?”

RVI: Well, here you see him at the groundbreaking ceremony. This is what he had to say. “I welcome them and I love them and I have many friends who are Muslims.” Certainly, Jack, we should love everybody.

JVI: Rexella, I wish we had time for all these headlines as our President said, it is the fundamentalists among the Islamic who are the troublemakers. Most Muslims are people of peace and love and this proves is. Do you know that the Kuwaitis, the Curd’s, the Iranians may help us with the war against Iraq? Plus the Yemen people and Jordan and others saying, we want to stand with America. Now, I, too, love Muslims like Billy Graham does because it's the word of God. The Jewish Old Testament, "love your neighbor as yourself." The Lord Jesus said it in Matthew 5, verse 43. In Matthew 19:19, and in Mark chapter 12, verses 31 and 33, He said, "love your neighbor as yourself". He said it six times. The Apostle Paul in Romans chapter 13, verse 8 says, "Love your neighbor as yourself". Then explain what it meant, verse 9. Love works no ill, no harm to his neighbor. "

yup , sounds like a real wacko.
posted by sgt.serenity at 7:12 AM on November 27, 2002


Yeah, well, all I can say is, if this baby vibrates... I'm gettin' one!
posted by JollyWanker at 7:20 AM on November 27, 2002


What does this have to do with clones, sgt.serenity? Should we love the clones as ourselves?

yup , sounds like a real wacko.
posted by MaddCutty at 7:47 AM on November 27, 2002


Maybe it's just me, but I find this very sad. I imagine this upcoming baby as someone who'll face as many doubt as the Haley Joel Osment character in "AI". It's a human being, you know, and people talk about it as a dry experiment.
posted by 111 at 8:11 AM on November 27, 2002


faustessa - you and me both. how weird! I wanted to do that as soon as I knew about Dolly. It would have been fun, and like troutfishing I'd woop some dang sense into my cloned head.
posted by dabitch at 8:52 AM on November 27, 2002


Once again, thanks to our increasingly Taliban-esque intermingling of reality and religion - America gets left behind scientifically. But then, what to expect of a power structure that kicks out good soldiers because of who they sleep with in bed?
posted by owillis at 8:57 AM on November 27, 2002


/cheer cloning
posted by rushmc at 9:21 AM on November 27, 2002


Born in January? If it shares my birthday, I'm going to throw a fit. My dad already shares his birthday with 9/11, and I don't want constant reminders of other things on my birthday. Though this probably wouldn't be as sad as my dad's.
posted by stoneegg21 at 9:28 AM on November 27, 2002


Dunvegan: Clone Jerry? Fuck that! Clone Joey!
posted by BitterOldPunk at 9:54 AM on November 27, 2002


Hmm...Italian fertility expert...cloning...could it be...Jesus!? posted by gottabefunky

Not to be a total nerd (but, to be a total nerd), didn't the Klingons do this with Kahless? At least they had a single god-tradition--try programming Jesus with all the apocryphal info.

But hey! If we clone Jesus, Mohammed, Buddha, Abraham, and any others...imagine the Celebrity Boxing! ("My deity beat up your deity.")
posted by PennyPrune at 10:37 AM on November 27, 2002


Missed being the first new years baby? Just keep cloning yourself until you get it right.
Also, could we clone people without a head and use them for spare parts?
posted by blue_beetle at 10:44 AM on November 27, 2002


Mmmmm . . . Cloney Ramone.
posted by hackly_fracture at 10:52 AM on November 27, 2002


I, for one, welcome myself.

Sorry, couldn't resist. I wonder if the people in charge of these clones will fully take away all the humanity from these experiments, letting them die and be tested on at will. Could some unscrupulous pharmaceutical researcher use these clones as test subjects for experimental medicines? I would assume some further goal would be experimentation of gene modification in these clones. But what if you had a perfect, fully functional human clone? Is it ethical to test on it while its alive? Is it even ethical to test on it before it's born by tinkering with its genes?
posted by Stan Chin at 10:53 AM on November 27, 2002


Really though, I think someone better call shenanigans on these guys.

Putzface is right. This is a hoax, people. I don't believe the amount of credibility the media are giving this ass.
posted by mr_roboto at 11:12 AM on November 27, 2002


Even scarier. (NY Times, req log-in)
posted by BitterOldPunk at 11:42 AM on November 27, 2002


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