Astounding Discovery

March 7, 2003 5:56 AM

Astounding Discovery. Anybody else been waiting with breathless anticipation for March 8th, 2003? It's too late to debate whether or not this is a hoax (although that particular horse was pretty well beaten here). Our mystery man is on the run again, but the photos are going up tomorrow. Stay tight. The government is closing in. Even with everything else going on in the world, if they can't prevent this information from going public, all I can say is "biblical proportions."
posted by RKB (72 comments total)

Looks to me like he's just another fruitloop.
posted by metaxa at 6:18 AM on March 7, 2003

I'm really curious to see what this thing is... perhaps they're pictures of a cloned baby :).
posted by freakystyley at 6:20 AM on March 7, 2003

What exactly is this person looking to expose? The site is just a bit too much to wade through on a Friday morn.

A quick cliff note description?
posted by lampshade at 6:21 AM on March 7, 2003

I used key words in the search engine - words that exactly described the images. That's when all hell broke loose.

That may the lamest transition into "all hell broke loose" that I've ever read. On a side note, I think this would have been more fun to discuss if it were posted tomorrow.
posted by Pinwheel at 6:22 AM on March 7, 2003

I find myself once more confused. Am I losing my mind or are the posts lately less informative and more cryptic. I feel like I haven't been invited to the super secret Metafilter meeting.
posted by Outlawyr at 6:29 AM on March 7, 2003

Better not be another penis enlargement site.
posted by CrazyJub at 6:29 AM on March 7, 2003

We've discussed this before; the MeFi link in the post is broken for some reason, but here's its Google cache.

Snopes, too, thinks it's hype for some sort of media, maybe a book.
posted by Slithy_Tove at 6:30 AM on March 7, 2003

Here's my prediction....this site will be number one by the end of today.
posted by CrazyJub at 6:31 AM on March 7, 2003

rule number one is: we do not talk about the super secret Metafilter meeting.
posted by quonsar at 6:36 AM on March 7, 2003

...link should have been posted tomorrow.
posted by tomplus2 at 6:39 AM on March 7, 2003

A fat-free brownie that doesn't let you down in the taste department?
posted by planetkyoto at 6:43 AM on March 7, 2003

Who is this faction he keeps referring to? A faction? Please. I find it odd, after reading the front page introduction, that this guy is on the run, his phones were tapped, his bank accounts frozen, people in vans showing up at his house, etc... yet the website manages to live on with a problem. I'm as curious as anyone, but I think it's some kind of hoax or game.
posted by Witty at 6:45 AM on March 7, 2003

Wow, what a great link. Almost as good as the "What do you think Colin will say tomorrow?" thread. Thanks for posting zero content.
posted by lazaruslong at 6:47 AM on March 7, 2003

It's going to be goatse.cx. I'm telling you.
posted by Pretty_Generic at 6:47 AM on March 7, 2003

Mefi's were curious last November too.
posted by Tarrama at 6:50 AM on March 7, 2003

This site has been posted as a piece of writing with purposeful clues and discrepancies to indicate its fictitious nature

It's not a hoax. It's fiction. Badly written fiction, at that.
posted by ook at 6:51 AM on March 7, 2003

My personal favorite from the second link above (received email):

Subject: Truth of the Stargate and Your Involvement
To: [e-mail]
Priority: Normal

I'm am sure that you, and many others have seen either the movie, or the television show known as Stargate. I wish to inform you all that it is loosely based on truth, of course their is no Colonel O'neil, Teal'c, etc., but the stargate itself is in fact real.

There was even an episode of the show with this premise. Priceless.
posted by moonbiter at 6:51 AM on March 7, 2003

My guess? It's a new color of M&M's. Or a picture of a tourist guy standing on top of the WTC towers as a plane comes in from behind him. Or maybe a picture of G.W. Bushes clone army.
posted by Hugh2d2 at 6:53 AM on March 7, 2003

My vote is that it's hype for a video game. (This opinion coming from a distinct non-gamer). But thanks for reminding of this little adventure.
Hey, maybe this is all tied in to hard evidence that will be presented to the UN...(Sorry, IraqFilter, I know).
Waiting with bated breath.
posted by chandy72 at 6:54 AM on March 7, 2003

It's a new flavor of gum.
posted by angry modem at 7:00 AM on March 7, 2003

"but I think it's some kind of hoax"

I just love watching people let this crap reel them in. People are actually waiting to find out if something they know is a dumb joke or a promo will turn out to be a dumb joke or a promo. What? "Who wants be a millionaire" no longer riveting? Jerry Springer in reruns? Already read the Enquirer cover to cover?
posted by y6y6y6 at 7:07 AM on March 7, 2003

We need a mojo working for this one.
posted by Tarrama at 7:24 AM on March 7, 2003

I got a buck that says it's a $5000 scooter.
posted by UncleFes at 7:30 AM on March 7, 2003

Did anyone read the disclaimer? Couldn't be plainer:

Dear reader,

This site has been posted as a piece of writing with purposeful clues and discrepancies to indicate its fictitious nature leading up to the release of ........

Thank you for your overwhelming positive response. I have posted some of the emails that I've received during the last few months for your viewing.

The purpose behind this site was to create intrigue, fascination and interest leading up to what this event is about.
posted by TurkishGolds at 7:34 AM on March 7, 2003

I bet it's a declaration of war on Iraq.
posted by Frank Grimes at 7:36 AM on March 7, 2003

The point isn't to debate whether or not it's a hoax. I think I already said that, and Turkish and others obviously point to the fact that it's a work of fiction (even though, surprisingly, a lot of people write in swearing up and down that it's the most really real conspiracy ever). Everybody knows Joe Millionaire wasn't "reality," but millions still turned in for the finale.

What I'm waiting for, seriously, is the pictures. The finish. He's been good about keeping the story going, amidst a ton of early hype, and it deserves some closure.

I know it should have been posted tomorrow, but I got ants in my pants, and, besides, who's to say they're actually gonna go up? This is just an early placeholder to be ready, right at 12:05, to click and be... umm... amazed. Or something.
posted by RKB at 7:47 AM on March 7, 2003

(Cliff Notes Version)

Aliens! Government conspiracy! (I'm on the run!... mystery vans follow me everywhere!) Mystery cults! Strange sects!....Sex! Death! This site will change your life! Stay Tuned! Give me more site hits! Propagate my memes throught cyberspace! Waah waah waa, waah, waa, waah!!!! [*Kaachiiing!.....$*]

There you go. I've covered it all. No need to even muck about on fruity, cryptic web-vertising campaign sites.

As the Buddha's followers said to the disciples of a miracle worker - "So....your master works miracles. Mmm. Interesting. So does our master. When he eats, he eats. When he sleeps, he sleeps. When he shits, he shits. When he talks, he talks!" - But it went right over their heads.
posted by troutfishing at 7:51 AM on March 7, 2003

*Scratches head, dandruff flakes drift lazily to floor to land in bright patch of sunlight.......Writes down memo to self: "Tomorrow, 12:15 p.m. - check out weird cult website. Prepare to flee/worship/capitalize on situation. Eat healthy lunch."*
posted by troutfishing at 7:55 AM on March 7, 2003

It'll be for a camera that *vibrates*
posted by metaxa at 7:58 AM on March 7, 2003

on the basis of 9 + 1 + 1 = 11, 11 = 33 = elitist.

3 + 8 = 11

therefore. If anything, it will be a terrorist attack or something with terrorists

or nothing
posted by RobbieFal at 8:00 AM on March 7, 2003

OhmyGAWD - a new meme?

"Yes sir. SIR! We are fully prepared to capitalize/worship/flee"

"In other news tonight, Mr. Shadily Avaricious, of AvariceCo said of the new corporate takeover looming over his company: "We are fully prepared to exploit/worship/flee our new management structure."

"Groooovvy Baby!....Capitalize/worship/flee.......Oh, behave!...." (apologies to Mr. Mike "bitchin' meme" Meyers)
posted by troutfishing at 8:02 AM on March 7, 2003

I can't wait for the pictu......uh oh, My computer just made a 'whirring' noise. dammit! now I must flee...

While browsing the previous thread, I skimmed the TimeCube link... Wow! being delusional must be fun and exciting. I mean how else can you be the only one with absolute truth and the smartest person on the planet? No how, that's how!
posted by srw12 at 8:36 AM on March 7, 2003

But we are all going to check it anyway, aren't we?
posted by Tarrama at 8:36 AM on March 7, 2003

whatever it is for (my guess is the matrix)
i have taken a solemn oath not to buy whatever the heck it is in revenge for its annoyance.
posted by sgt.serenity at 8:38 AM on March 7, 2003

8 March is International Women's Day. Maybe someone has cloned dozens of Maggie Thatchers to lead us into Armageddon against Saddam.

Anyway, my curiosity is roused, but then I am easily suggestible and can scare myself witless looking at photos of ghosts on the net.

Let's hope the site doesn't exceed its bandwidth before tomorrow.
posted by essexjan at 8:51 AM on March 7, 2003

on the basis of 9 + 1 + 1 = 11, 11 = 33 = elitist.

My math does not add up for what is in bold, do I have to wait for tomorrow too to find out this arithmetic.
posted by thomcatspike at 9:06 AM on March 7, 2003

I am SO hoping this guy posts pictures of his schlong. It would be the greatest F.U. ever perpetrated on the net.
posted by Perigee at 9:12 AM on March 7, 2003

So all you people who are sure that it's a hoax or a joke or an ad AREN'T going to check it? And for some reason, those of us who are curious are, for the same reason, easily amused and "reeled in". Isn't the anticipation entertainment in and of itself?
It's plain to see I have squared the sphere.
posted by hoborg at 9:15 AM on March 7, 2003

If it's photos of a rabbit with some pancakes on its head, I quit.
posted by Guy Smiley at 9:35 AM on March 7, 2003

You guys, this is obviously real. Jeez...are we all so naive?
posted by Kodel at 11:00 AM on March 7, 2003

hey, does this March 8 blah blah page look 3D to anybody else? Those reds are really jumping forward and the blues receding backward. Maybe it's my new glasses.

Seriously, it looks really freaky.

I'm afraid a monster is going to burst through the screen!
posted by billder at 11:14 AM on March 7, 2003

I got a buck that says it's a $5000 scooter.

Classic.
posted by mathis23 at 11:25 AM on March 7, 2003

Jesus, people. It's obviously this guy.
posted by password at 11:45 AM on March 7, 2003

yawn. those of us in the know, know it's nothing less than the grand opening of livenudequonsar.com.
posted by quonsar at 12:23 PM on March 7, 2003

Time for everyone to break out their copies of "The Illuminatus!" Trilogy...
posted by tgrundke at 12:34 PM on March 7, 2003

I feel sorry for the guy who wrote the page... there's someone I know who's, shall we say, seriously unwell, and he's reported exactly the same things as the 8march guy, and he's absolutely convinced that black vans used to follow him around, etc.

It's called schizophrenia. My advice for this guy is to take some fscking Haldol and deal with it...
posted by clevershark at 1:27 PM on March 7, 2003

Yeah, totally, schizophrenics should just "deal with it."
posted by saltykmurks at 2:29 PM on March 7, 2003

So, this 8march2003.com thing...is it something that one would have to own a calendar in order to appreciate...?
posted by davidmsc at 6:37 PM on March 7, 2003

Of course whoever it is didn't buy enough bandwidth... whoever hears first, will you post it here?
posted by sparky at 9:24 PM on March 7, 2003

Its 03/08/03 now (well, where I live it is) and http://www.8march2003.com/ is a dead link.

The page cannot be displayed
The page you are looking for is currently unavailable. The Web site might be experiencing technical difficulties, or you may need to adjust your browser settings.

Looks like they got to his host.
posted by Trik at 10:47 PM on March 7, 2003

Had to check this site out... looks like it's back up again, but no pictures and all of the domains that they suggest for foriegn mirrors are pointing back at the main site.

The main site, incidentally, is registered through a company that does anonymous domain name registrations, and traceroutes to somewhere around San Diego. 64.202.166.10 .
posted by insomnia_lj at 11:20 PM on March 7, 2003

Oh. The world will fictionally end in a cataclysmic flood, that's all. From the site:

"Why the hell has a secret faction built a SUPERSHIP on a man-made plateau in a mountain range high above sea level?

This could only mean one thing! They are expecting an event to take place that will cause cataclysmic global flooding."
posted by moonbird at 11:24 PM on March 7, 2003

Ark II?
posted by quin at 11:30 PM on March 7, 2003

Ok... looks like mountainsub.com traceroutes to somewhere in Australia, probably around Sydney. 203.17.36.11 .

The last hop is con7608-4.gw.connect.com.au

The registrar for mountainsub.com is:

Hartley, Roger [e-mail]
Level 8 237 Collins Street
Melbourne, Victoria 3000
AU
+61.395139612

Not sure who this Roger Hartley is. There is no listing on the web for a Hartley Publicity, but conspiracy theorists will be glad to know there *IS* a Roger Hartley, who is South Australia's Deputy Chief Executive of the Department of Industry & Trade.
posted by insomnia_lj at 12:16 AM on March 8, 2003

From the linked site:
Tell us in one word what this publicity event is about, and you could be one of 100 winners of a free special gift that relates to this release.

IS IT FOR A NEW:
GAME
BEVERAGE
TOY
NOVEL
CELLPHONE
SNACK
MOVIE
CRUISE
CAMERA
SHOW
CD
CAR
BOAT
VACATION
OTHER SUGGESTIONS?

WRITE YOUR ANSWER IN THE SUBJECT LINE
AND EMAIL TO: [e-mail]
posted by planetkyoto at 12:18 AM on March 8, 2003

This is really dumb - like I thought it was dumb before, but just a little. Now, it's just really really dumb. I mean really, a big Noah part II boat? A chopper in the air? Secrets? No. This is a classic case of boredom, and lonliness. If I am dreadfully wrong, than well...I guess I'll be the only moron without a wetsuit. Oh, where is Gilgamesh when you need him...
posted by Kodel at 12:39 AM on March 8, 2003

It is definitely a publicity stunt. There is a disclaimer link off of http://www.8march2003.com that says a lot more:

--------------
Dear reader,

This site has been posted as a piece of writing with purposeful clues and discrepancies to indicate its fictitious nature leading up to the release of ........

Thank you for your overwhelming positive response. I have posted some of the emails that I've received during the last few months for your viewing.

The purpose behind this site was to create intrigue, fascination and interest leading up to what this event is about.
--------------

So, that leaves three big questions...

1> What are the purposeful clues?
2> Where are the discrepencies?
3> Why should we give a rat's ass?

Oh... wait. A hundred people will win a special free gift Count me in!
posted by insomnia_lj at 12:43 AM on March 8, 2003

This reminds me of Alternative 3, which almost gave me nightmares in 1977 (well, I was only 18 you know, and I've already told you I'm highly suggestible/gullible).

We are told that more will be revealed on 15 April. I know I won't be able to resist clicking on the site on that day to see how much of a sucker I've been taken for this time.
posted by essexjan at 5:30 AM on March 8, 2003

Mmm. Bummer. I still can't make out anything other than a big blurry blob. A photoshopped blob on a mountainside. I was hoping for something more dramatic, I suppose, like bondage photos, or Jesus in a police lineup, or some equally smoking gun.

And the mountainsub website? The e-mail that planetkyoto quotes actually goes to cia.com.au, which looks like an Australian web hosting site. The guy unfortunately got sloppy, too, because the URL to the bogus competetition actually points to http://www.cia.com.au/wakeman2012/page2sub.htm.

Well, at least if any of this turns out to be true, I don't have to worry about some massive American government coverup. Just looks like Australia is going to sink into the ocean.
posted by RKB at 5:38 AM on March 8, 2003

Hello....... Can anyone hear me? Did anyone else survive? Am I the last man on Earth?

[OVER]
posted by LowDog at 7:19 AM on March 8, 2003

Haha!
posted by Witty at 9:53 AM on March 8, 2003

Sorry, I know a "haha" is such a lame post, but that was fuckin' funny... not just funny, but fuckin' funny. Especially the [OVER] part. Still laughing. [OUT]
posted by Witty at 9:54 AM on March 8, 2003

Roger that, LowDog.

Overlords here. Thanks for the welcome.

[OUT]
posted by Dunvegan at 10:56 AM on March 8, 2003

they've taken the disclaimer offline, but it's easy enough to see that this is a publicity event. A little more sophisticated than your average web hoax, but not much.

You're supposed to...
-go to 8march2003.com
-as per the instructions, go to "mountainsub.com". Note the server for the link at the bottom of the page (cia.com.au, an innocuous enough internet connectivity company in australia, probably chosen because of its ominous-sounding name). Click on said link.
-The site uses a 0-pixel top frame in order to mask the domain name, which is supposed to make us think it's a big conspiracy. On that second page they're running a contest to see if people can determine what this is an ad for (my bet is, it's a movie).

The funny thing is the feedback link. If you just look at the link it says it goes to a "cia.com" address (which BTW is just another internet company), but the link goes to "cia.com.au".

It's pretty elaborate, but it shouldn't really fool anyone... I'm guessing it's trying to generate hype for some new aussie movie.
posted by clevershark at 11:09 AM on March 8, 2003

You're breaki -fffffffffffffff- ome in, come in. We're sending a squad over. What's your operating number?

[krrrrrtch]
posted by Witty at 11:15 AM on March 8, 2003

help ! help ! the waters coming up to my knees!
AND I LIVE ON THE THIRTEENTH FLOOR !
posted by sgt.serenity at 2:15 PM on March 8, 2003

Arc II exposed!
posted by grumblebee at 5:15 PM on March 8, 2003

Yes, grumblebee, it was already funny when quin did it.

Why are so many people thinking this is for a movie? Wouldn't a movie have, like, a budget or something. (for decent website/photoshop/coherent writing, etc.)

. . .or do y'all mean for some lame student film.
posted by dgaicun at 10:46 PM on March 8, 2003

I think a budget for a website that you suggest would detract from it's "authenticity".
posted by Witty at 12:11 AM on March 9, 2003

Oops. Missed Quin's scoop. Sorry.
posted by grumblebee at 9:11 AM on March 9, 2003

I think a budget for a website that you suggest would detract from it's "authenticity".

I was thinking of Blair Witch, that was a low budget movie, with a clever high budget promotion campaign, with a cool web site. Blair Witch did a spectacular job of faking authenticity too. (looking back it feels we were all a little bit tricked into seeing it. replay value=0%)

Ark II (*snicker*, at least you thought of it too gb!) could have done 1000 things to make its story more vague, mysterious and believable, and it could've started, not with a kick-ass flash website, but at least a coherent story or good photoshop.
posted by dgaicun at 3:40 PM on March 9, 2003

I like to watch.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 7:23 PM on March 10, 2003